


Winter Hearts

by KPRC8N



Category: Byeolbit, Starlights, VIXX
Genre: Athens, Bortherhood, Delphi, F/M, Greece, Rivalry, Romance, Slow Burn, Some angst, holiday romance, some mature scenes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-28
Updated: 2019-02-19
Packaged: 2019-05-29 19:46:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 201,851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15080405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KPRC8N/pseuds/KPRC8N
Summary: FYI this has been previously published online elsewhere, to fair responseSiana just wants a quiet life working hard and dreaming harder. A routine vacation job at her dad's during winter break turns into a dream come true when her favourite pop idol group spends a few weeks in town. But the dream soon becomes a nightmare when reality and fantasy collide, forcing her to choose between the safety and security of her old routine, and a life filled with the promise of love, desire and glory.





	1. Siana's Last Day

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to write out some feels, and also to explore how a real-life situation might turn out if a starlight ever, ever got to meet the boys and wow, start something
> 
> It's a fiction, and the premise is ridiculous, but I wanted it to read as possible and real
> 
> It's turned into something bigger than I ever expected
> 
> I still feel as if I am stealing a member's soul when I write as if I know who they are - I don't, am just projecting my own ideals onto characters that look like them and share their past as we know it:)

Siana yawned and looked up from her book. The clock showed it was just past 9am. She closed the book and hugged it to her chest. Despite sleeping with the aircon on, she felt overly hot and bothered. She wished the book was a warm somebody who would hug her back.

Today she had woken up early to go for a run, but it was raining heavily outside. Condensation fogged up her windows as she read her fantasy novel. It was the latest in a series of books about an immortal woman whose special abilities had forced her on the run from a league of men eager for her demise.

Siana grimaced. She used to love these books. She had waited almost a year for the last one to be published, and now that it was finally in her hands... she wasn't interested anymore. She felt listless, vaguely emotionless. She turned over to lie at the edge of her bed, letting the book fall to the ground.

It was her last day of college, and she couldn't wait to leave. It was also literally her last day in Malaysia, at least for a while, as she was leaving for Greece for a few months.

She would miss her mum, of course. Her mum was a mix of Korean and East Malaysian, and Siana grew up speaking the local Malay language fairly well, as well as a smattering of Hangguk. But since her grandmother died, Siana's ties to Korea had lessened, and she identified less as Korean and more as general urbanite who spoke several languages and happened to be partly Korean, Sabahan and Greek.

She was Greek because her dad was Greek, and unlike her mum, he had spent a lot of time teaching her to speak and write his language well when they were living there. But since her parents' divorce almost ten years ago, she and her mum had gone back to Sabah, where her mum had family, whilst he had remained in the motherland to run his small studio in his hometown. From there he composed and produced songs, getting more and more work as time went on. Then he had turned his family building into a short stay apartment block for international tourists and began to find more time on his hands as he could be more choosy about the music work.

He had called her one night before she had graduated from high school and told her that he would like her to spend her Christmas vacations with him Greece, where she could help him with guests. She loved the idea, because she knew it was low season during the winter and the work wouldn't be difficult, and because he had a basement space which he would let her use as a dance studio. For the last three years she had spent her holidays there, and even started teaching dance classes to children last Christmas.

She sat up, yawning again. Her body felt languid and heavy from sleep, and she wanted to feel her muscles wake up. It was that feeling of restlessness that dancers have, who need to feel their muscles and bones move well. She circled her head gently and stretched her arms up high. Feeling the stretch rejuvenate her sleepy body, she sat on the floor with the soles of her feet together, slowly bending over her them and feeling a deep stretch spread warmth through her back and her inner thigh muscles. She groaned, loving that feeling of a good deep stretch, immensely satisfying.

She looked up at the posters on her bedroom wall. Kpop idols and Korean drama actors. Her gaze reached the large poster above her headboard. It was of VIXX, during their Chained Up era. White suits, no shirts, red collars. She still cringed a little at their collars, but that same thing that made her cringe was the thing that made her love it so much. It was an obvious statement, and a hidden one

She loved the idea that despite their masculinity, their physical strength and maturity, they were willing to submit to being slaves to love. She looked to Ravi, whose black hair stood high and contrasted with his forehead and darkened eyes. Bless Ravi for his perceptive and seemingly highly sexualised thought processes.

She smiled. It was a bit of a joke, since he always seemed so juvenile on camera.

Then she looked at Leo, whose public persona had become more and more relaxed and cheerful in the past few months. In the poster, though, he looked surly, almost angry.

Under a mop of bleached blonde hair, his eyes were half shut and stared belligerently at her. His high cheekbones and straight nose made her think of those idealised oriental warriors, with narrowed eyes and windswept hair. She smiled, knowing that somewhere in Korea, Leo was probably slouched over a device with a wire headband keeping the hair out of his eyes.

She rolled her eyes at herself. Fantasising over her pop idols was never a clearcut process for her. She always managed to ruin the moment for herself by the thought of those beautiful men, without the stylists and makeup artists, greasy from a day of work, walking around their dorms in sweats and old tee shirts.

Somehow, it comforted her to know that even pop idols have bad hair days.

And sometimes, if she let the pictures in her head linger, those pop idols in sweats became just as delicious to her as they were in white suits with red chokers round their necks.

She looked back up at Leo. He looked back at her, so...pissed.

It was her most favourite look on him.

 

**

 

Siana continued stretching, slowly bending and sinking into each position, as she thought about her upcoming trip. She had already packed, lightly as usual, since she already had winter clothes in Greece.

She had spent the last few weeks of college restless, unhappy. She was glad that, unlike most of her class mates, she had been taught young to look for work and business opportunities - so she didn’t feel the dread they did that school was ending. She felt lucky her mum worked from home as a copy editor and dabbled in writing here and there. It meant that there was always someone home for her, and it was a great comfort.

Her mum also sold handicraft which made her a surprising, if modest, amount of money. She herself taught dance part-time at the nearby ballet school, which offered street dance classes for kids on the weekends. Often she helped her mum tend to her booth at bazaars. She knew how to take care of herself, and how to keep busy.

Her dad lived in a tiny port town called Itea, situated south of Delphi, that tourist destination that kept the surrounding townships in business all year round. His family home was really an apartment building of four floors and a basement. The top was a penthouse that took up the whole floor. The next floor down was her small studio apartment and a slightly larger apartment for rent. The second floor had four apartments for rent on it, but most of those were long term rentals and, although paid less, were steady and provided her dad with part of his livelihood. The ground floor had four spaces: her father's apartment, his separate, now unused music studio, a retail space which faced the main road, and another apartment for rent. And under all that, a basement studio that opened out into the yard via a small set of stairs up out of the ground.

She would be responsible for the guests' comfort, a concierge of sorts.

She sighed happily and jumped up. She tidied her bed and put away the book. Her mum called out to her from outside, and she went out for breakfast.

Her mum Jenny was sitting at the table with her espresso by her side. Before her, her laptop was open and she was typing furiously. Siana went over and kissed the top of her head.

"Love you, productive mother."

"Mmmhmm," Jenny smiled, never taking her eyes off the screen. Siana made her breakfast and sat down next to Jenny.

"Breakfast time, mother! Put the electronics away now."

Jenny sighed, typing the last few words and saving the document. She shut the laptop and rested her her chin in her hand, squinting at Siana as if she were a specimen.

"I love you too, management mary."

Siana cracked a smile through the toast she was biting.

"What will you do while I am gone, ma?"

"Sleep anytime of the day and party when I wake."

"Really? Party with your knitting wool and special scissors?"

"YAAAASS!"

"Ugh, ma stop."

"I have about a thousand tiny beanies to make for my christmas booth and this year i want to make me enough money to publish my trash novel."

Siana smiled, happy her mum would be busy while she was gone. Her eyes twinkled naughtily.

"Please don't ever ask me to read it," Siana said.

"Promise me you will never read it or recommend it to people we know."

They both held up their hands, munching thoughtfully.

Jenny smiled a little, then held out her hands to Siana. Siana looked at them suspiciously.

"You see these hands? These hands birthed you on their own."

"MA!"

"Ok, they changed your diapers. Anyway, they love you very much and want you to take care of yourself, and to give your dad a big hug, and that you forget about me for a while and that you find your husband soon." She placed her two hands on Siana's munching cheeks and patted them forcefully. Siana cringed.

"I don't want a husband."

"They want you to find anyone you want who is of a decent character, sexual orientation and fat paycheck to love soon."

"Ma, I barely made 20."

"Okay I take that bit back, I don't know, I was overcome. Anyway, someone real, not like those kpop idols you love."

"I don't just love them ma. I worship them." Siana stared blankly into the near distance, pausing for effect.

"That used to scare me, now I just worry you seriously think you should hold out for one of them to come sweep you off your feet."

"Ma, I know that will never happen, but let me compartmentalise my romantic fantasies. I swear I won't lose sight of reality."

Jenny's face crunches into a dramatic sigh.

"Awww, my baby, that makes me feel so much better."

"Do you need someone to stay with you, because I can ask Aunty Josie-"

"Ugh no, she's a neat freak."

Siana looked around at their spotless, minimalist house. She smiled.

They finished their breakfast, Siana listening to the steady pouring rain outside. Although she worried about leaving her mum alone, she could not wait to get on that plane and leave the hot tropics and school life behind.

 

**

 

Siana walked down the gangway leading to the plane. She had her carry-all, which had everything she needed for the trip. But in the hold was her humungous suitcase stuffed with crafting wool, textiles, and the two evening gowns her mum had forced her to take with her.

"Sweats and tights. Ugh! That's for Teacher Siana and Working Siana. These, " Jenny said, holding up the two dresses, "...are for my Lady-Like, Looking for a Boyfriend Siana."

Siana frowned.

"Ma, I will never ever wear those."

"You don't like them?"

"It's not that I don't like them, which I don't, by the way. It's just that I can't do laundry and mop floors with them in the middle of winter. And they look scratchy."

Jenny smiled and folded them expertly into the suitcase.

"Because you love me, and because all these things in here are mine anyway, you are taking these."

"I will give them to the first cousin I see."

Jenny huffed and pointed at them.

"They're wash and wear, look! they don't even crinkle! Just do me a favour, and hang them up. If you don't use them by the time you leave, give them away. Better yet, sell them with all the other stuff."

"Great, a store full of crafting haberdashery and two evening gowns."

"Thank you and I love you and you promised."

"No I didn't."

"I saw it in your beautiful expressive eyes." Jenny chucked her on the chin.

Siana smiled as she approached the cabin crew at the cabin entrance. Suddenly she saw Minjani in her uniform step into view. They both smiled widely, excitedly waving at each other as she approached. The handsome steward in front of Minjani looked at Siana in puzzlement before realising she was waving at Minjani who was behind him.

"Hi babe! Back to Athens?"

"Min! I should have asked you if you were flying! Sorry, I was so busy getting ready for this trip!"

They hugged in front of the steward, who looked on with a big smile on his face. His gaze lingered on Siana's happy face as she squeezed her eyes shut with glee.

"Yeah and I will be flying again in about two weeks, so maybe I can come visit! Oh, this is Mark, we’ve been flying this sector together.”

"Hi Mark. Siana."

"Siana. Nice-iana. I mean, nice name"

Siana smiled at him as he continued staring at her. Min cringed and rolled her eyes. Siana nodded her head and looked at Minjani with her plastered-on smile. The passenger behind her coughed dramatically. Mark suddenly broke out of his stupor and turned to tend to the next passenger. Minjani laughed and showed Siana the way to her seat. As Siana walked by, Mark caught Minjani's attention. She rolled her eyes and mouthed "nice-iana?"

Siana looked for her seat. She loved flying, because it always meant the beginning of something new, even if she was just returning home. On a flight, all she had were her thoughts and feelings and she loved immersing herself in her fantasies and memories and living a life she didn't really have. It made her feel happy, although more often than not, left her feeling a little antsy and restless. She laughingly thought of it as an addiction, then remembered her mum's words that morning.

She put her bag in the overhead bin, smiling down at the child sitting next to her seat and the mother by the window. The mum looked at her anxiously. Siana offered for her to sit in the aisle so that she could get up easy for the child if she needed to. Gratefully, the mum smiled and stood up. Inwardly, Siana shook her head at herself. She couldn't help thinking about being trapped by the window with a noisy kid between her and her exit. Oh well, she would deal with that if it happened later. She sat down and sent a last message to both her parents that she had boarded. She turned the phone to airplane mode and checked she had her documents and battery pack with her. Earphones on, she put some music on shuffle and leaned back. Clazziquai's "Hold Your Tears" came on.

Immediately, her thoughts turned to Leo, and she remembered the clips and pictures of Vixx's latest comeback that had flooded her feed. Self-conscious, awkward, but now cheery Leo. She suspected he was less self-conscious than he seemed. Sometimes he just stared too confidently into the phones that recorded him. Sometimes, she felt he knew exactly what effect he had on his fans.

Starlights were supposed to be well-behaved fans. She wondered if any of them ever regretted not stealing a hug or kiss when they were face to face with their idols. She smiled wryly. She wondered if she would keep her composure or lose it if she ever met Leo face to face.

Then she laughed a little. As if that would happen. It made her feel sad and a touch emotional that she was acting lovesick over what was really a set of pictures. There was no Leo in her life, there wasn't even any love interest in her life.

She shook herself. She prided herself on being level-headed, hardworking and productive. She felt she wanted her future partner to admire those traits rather than her looks or body.

A little sadly, she waited for the plane to taxi down the runway.

 

**

Siana looked at her reflection in the dark glass of her phone. She had glossy dark brown hair, now slightly lighter as she had spent a lot of time in the sun for campus sports. She supposed it was straight like her mum's, but coloured like her father's. It lightened in the sun, which is what his did. When she was younger she had sometimes looked blonde.

Her skin was naturally a honeyed creamy tone, but now was almost caramel from her tan. She had a straight nose and high cheekbones, thanks to mum. Her eyes were dark brown and hitched up at the corners like her mum's, though they were large like her dad's.

She could see that she was pretty and she knew her looks had an effect on men, just as they had on Mark earlier. But she also knew very well that they were not talents or skills or something she had earned.

She had merely received them, almost by chance, as gifts that had dribbled down a genetic line from her ancestors.

Others would say that that confluence of gifts were fated for her. She would say those gifts could open doors but they didn't keep them open.

Above all, Siana saw herself as a well-grounded, cheery sort of person who loved life.

And yet, she had been feeling so restless and agitated for the last part of the school year. Was it because she was finishing college? She thought not. Whilst her friends were still trying to figure out what they wanted to do, or were facing their biggest challenges trying to get into university degrees for further studies, she was already on her life path.

She loved dancing, teaching and working. She wanted to live deep in the community, and affect the people directly around her. She didn't really like the idea of making changes from behind a desk. She wanted hands-on, human experiences. And she was already setting herself up well for that. Sometimes, it made her feel old. Other times, she felt free of hangups and the daily pressure her friends seem to have.

So why did she feel suddenly restless?

As always, during these times when feelings of listlessness consumed her, she turned to her thoughts. Sometimes she became highly rational, thinking through events and experiences in her life. Sometimes, like now, she turned to fantasy.

She saw herself in a world that was just like hers, real and everyday. She saw herself bumping into the famous six, and having a stupendous moment of connection, where one of them spoke to her, or smiled at her, or just looked at her. She felt butterflies in the pit of her stomach, and replayed her imagined moments over and over until they became like broken records, both annoying and compelling at the same time.

Being who she was, she felt she was stealing a part of them and keeping it for herself, and she felt weirdly selfish and grotesque about it. She laughed. What kind of fan felt guilty like she did? Fans were all about feeling like they had ownership of their idols. She wondered if she was superstitious, like people who believed cameras captured their souls for real, when they first invented cameras. Her lip curled. Then all of us are guilty of soul stealing, she thought wryly. It made her feel better, so she turned her thoughts back to her daydreams.

The plane took off, and she enjoyed the rumble of the engines as she got pressed back into her seat. She was suddenly back in her imaginary world where she was sharing stares with VIXX.

She saw herself standing under an umbrella, in the rain, waiting to cross a small road going into a basement carpark of the large convention centre she imagined she was working in. Two large MPVs rolled up, turning into the road as a garage door opened to let them in. As the first van passed, she looked inside and suddenly locked eyes with N, who was sitting in the front seat. Recognition dawned on her face, but she tried hard to school her features. What was she, a schoolgirl?

N immediately saw her reaction and his lips curled into a knowing smile. She saw him laugh a little and turn his eyes back to the front as they passed. In the back, she saw Hongbin and Hyuk talking to each other, unaware of her. The car slowed and entered the building. She could hear distant shouting and some screaming behind her, and suddenly she heard a rush of footsteps. She turned to notice a small horde of girls running towards her, or rather, towards the cars.

In the next car, Ken, who was sitting in the front seat, rolled down his window and started waving to the fans.

"Slow down, starlights, we will see you inside!" he called, scrunching up his eyes and blowing a kiss. The girls squealed, but they slowed down, though still approaching as quickly as they could. The car kept passing, almost by her. In the back she saw Leo by the window, looking out, with Ravi hanging his arms round his neck and looking out at all the girls. Ravi smiled and waved, but Leo stared impassively into the upheld cameras, one by one.

Siana wondered if he was unhappy or merely doing the fans a service by looking into their cameras. Oddly, she thought it would be rather calculative of him to look into the cameras like that, knowing that people were misreading his impassivity as awkwardness, shyness or even unhappiness.

If he was using that misconception to purposefully make the girls' hearts flutter when he looked into their cameras... well, that would make him a casanova of sorts.

She scoffed and rolled her eyes. Typical, she thought. Typical that a guy would do that. and typical that she would think that sort of thought in the middle of fantasising about her idols. Siana settled back into her seat.

Way to go to break your own spell, Siana. The corner of her mouth lifted as she rolled her eyes. Suddenly Leo's gaze fell on her, and he seemed to stop himself from blinking. Stunned, she locked gazes with him as they passed by, then at the last moment she smiled at him. She felt like she was apologising. He, on the other hand, seemed to look both angry and bored until they finally disappeared into the building. Guards stepped forward to prevent them from stepping inside as the roller shutter came down.

Amidst some more screaming and more than a few whimpers of delight, she stood still until the girls brushed past her to leave.

 

**

 

Shaking herself, she crossed the road and continued on her way. She entered the building where she worked and left her umbrella with the security. She took off her overcoat and bypassed the lift lobby to take the workers' lift in the back.

As she waited, she put on her lanyard and checked her security pass. She was working as an admin assistant at the hotel in the building, and had to make sure she was presentable at all times. As she waited, she heard a commotion behind her and the hiss of walkie talkies as security came through some restricted access doors.

To her surprise, they walked in escorting the boys, all dressed in black suits and sporting their various hairstyles. N saw her first and smiled and waved. He nodded politely as he said, "Didn't we see you outside?"

She only managed to nod as one of the security came up to her and apologised that she would have to take the lift separately because they were running late for an appearance. The lift pinged open. It was one of those huge lifts that could accommodate a car, since this was a convention centre that held all sorts of exhibitions.

N looked at the lift, then security and then at her. The officer immediately guessed N's intentions and nodded reluctantly. N gestured for her to get in, and she did so, standing as close to the button panel and as out of the way as she could. The boys filed in, one by one acknowledging her, and she felt her face burning as she saw Leo bringing up the rear. She bowed her head before he walked by, as if in shyness, to avoid an awkward exchange or non-exchange with him.

One of the officers she was familiar with, and he came in last and stood by her. In a tiny voice she asked which floor, and he answered jovially. She pressed the buttons for her floor and theirs, and realised they would be getting off first, which felt like a relief.

Loudly the officer who knew her asked if he would see her at lunch today at the cafeteria as usual. She smiled reluctantly and nodded, hoping a large hand would appear from the heavens and zip his mouth shut. She suddenly felt like she was under a microscope.

The lift stopped, and everyone started getting out.

She could feel Leo hanging back, and that he was going to be the last one out. She felt hot and bothered, and was a little aghast at herself for being all flustered.

She told herself, hewas just a guy who was on the way to work, just like her. Just a guy who had a childhood like her, who grew up playing and fighting with friends like she did, and who found something to do and was chasing a dream, just like any other person she came across.

Except this was Leo, and Leo had caught her staring at him, and Leo probably knew that she had thought and dreamed and talked about him in many ways, way before he ever even saw her for the first time.

Leo, who knew more about what she was feeling right now, than she could ever possibly know about even his public life. Because him knowing only that one tiny thing about her, was one thing too many. It made her burn with embarrassment and she wished him to walk right past her without a thought.

Everyone left the lift and proceeded down the long hallway. She looked up to see Leo approaching, the last one left in the lift with her. She was horrified to see that he was staring straight at her as he walked forward, that same almost blank, bored look in his eyes.

He slowed down and faced her. Her finger was still on the button holding the door open. Her pulse was racing, her mouth dry. His arm reached out towards hers, and she had an alarming thought that he was going to lean against the wall behind her and kiss her.

His head came forward as he leaned in, and her eyes dropped to look at his lips. Slowly, ever so slowly, he licked his lips with his tongue. She gasped, her mouth dropping open.

Then she heard a soft click, and then another and another. She looked up to see him concentrating on the panel to her side.

She glanced over to see him pressing every single button between this floor and hers. He did it slowly, almost thoughtfully. When he finished, he looked slightly pleased and straightened up, looking her belligerently in the eyes. She raised her eyebrows, thinking, how rude and mean.

His eyes, black, relaxed and still empty of expression. But his mouth... a slight crinkle in the muscle under his skin told her he was smirking.

But when she looked again, it was blank Leo all over.

Suddenly he was gone, a small gust of wind playing at her feet in his wake.

She let go of the button and the doors slid shut. She spent the next six floors looking blankly at the next floor number on the panel.

 

**

 

Siana's eyes flew open, and she snapped her mouth shut. She looked up to see Mark watching her as he stood in the aisle next to the trolley. He held a sippy cup in one hand as he stared at her for a moment. Then he smiled brightly and handed the sippy cup to the mother in her row.

"Here you go, fresh water. Anything else?" The mother shook her head and proceeded to feed her daughter. Mark looked at Siana.

"What would you like to have?"

"Oh, do you have chicken?"

"Yes, one chicken coming up." He retrieved a tray and took off wrappings and placed a bun and mineral water on it. As he passed it to her, he mouthed, "You okay?"

Siana nodded, flushed. She took the tray and put down her food tray. As Mark rolled the cart further down, she sat up and put away her phone. Maybe he had seen her gasping involuntarily in her seat with her eyes closed while she imagined Leo almost kissing her. No wonder he was checking if she was okay. She hoped he didn't think she was acting weird.

She screwed up her mouth into an angry pout.

She wondered at herself for imagining such odd things. That instead of a kiss, she would imagine Leo using his magnetic sexuality to trick her into thinking he was interested.

She groaned and stuffed a forkful of rice into her mouth. She was embarrassing herself, she thought. "Magnetic sexuality"? Who talks like that? Even worse, imagine fantasising about your favourite idol and ending the dream like that!

She chewed thoughtfully. But she was Siana. Siana never let things escalate. So of course, the Leo in her daydreams wasn't a player, but liked to play.

She smiled and laughed a little. Because if there were such a thing in real life where you bump into your pop idol on the street, share a weird unspoken intimate connection via eyeballs, then meet in an elevator and then he just walks up and kisses you, well...

Siana thought, yes, that would be an unrealistic and frankly, unnecessary escalation She laughed and looked down at her food, noticing that the little girl beside her was watching her intently.

And now even this child sees my insanity, she thought.

Siana smiled and winked at the little girl, who smiled back. She ate up, waited for her tray to be picked up and settled back into her seat to sleep. She slept deeply and dreamlessly.

Before she knew it, an announcement signalled their approach to Athens. When the mother and child went to the bathroom before their arrival, she followed as well and chatted with Min for a little while waiting in the queue. They promised to meet up again when Min came to Athens next, and as they hugged, she noticed Mark watching them as he collected blankets in the aisle.

She pretended she hadn't seen and went back to her seat. In no time, the plane was preparing for descent and she was asked to put her seat back up.

After a smooth landing she gathered up her stuff and followed the passengers out of the plane, waving excitedly to Min and nodding smilingly at Mark. She walked quickly to customs and had her passport stamped. At the luggage belt, she turned on her phone and searched for wifi to send her dad a message. As she started typing, she got a notification from her social media newsfeed.

Siana's eyes widened in shock. VIXX had announced new concert dates, and they were starting a tour of Asia in the last week of December!

And she would be here in Greece, working.

Her heart sank. All her excitement about coming here to Greece, finally seeing her dad again, and settling down to some easy work and cold weather for the next three months, seemed to seep out of her body like water through a sieve.

She wanted to stamp her foot and whine, but instead she let her her eyebrows crinkle up and a sigh escape from her lips. She felt tears welling up but she immediately took a deep breath and shook herself. She knew she had an opportunity to have a wonderful break in a beautiful place, making some money and seeing her beloved father. Why would she let the disappointment of missing a long-awaited concert spoil her enjoyment of it? She should be grateful and happy.

She looked up, blinking away more tears which threatened to fall. She took a step forward towards the luggage belt and saw her ginormous suitcase coasting towards her. Sadly, she thought of the crafting items inside, and those two evening gowns. She hated them all of a sudden.

As she reached forward to to pick it up, she was suddenly overcome by the silliness of hating inanimate crafting objects, and a little snicker of laughter escaped her lips. She smiled, her heart lifting a little. Like her mum, she couldn't help thinking of the silliness of any situation. She stood the vile suitcase of haberdashery upright and got her carryall and documents in order. If she wasn't alone, she would have kicked the suitcase out of spite in the hopes of making herself feel better. She walked up to the customs inspection, falling in line.

She saw Min ahead of her and watched to see if she would turn to say goodbye. She didn't, so Siana turned her attention to the customs officer, who asked her to open her suitcase. Seriously? She gave the officer a despondent look. She didn't know what it was that made him change his mind, but he suddenly waved her through with a wry smile on his face.

"Don't worry, he's not worth it, child," he said in Greek to her.

She cracked a wonky smile and nodded politely, grateful he was letting her through. How wrong and right he was, she thought. Not worth it, yet so worth it, not him but him... her thoughts jumbled over in her mind as she pulled the case out the sliding doors ahead. Inside the airport arrivals lobby she looked left and right for Min, but she was nowhere in sight.

"She went ahead to check on our shuttle to the hotel," Siana heard Mark's voice behind her.

"Oh, I just saw her ahead and wanted to say goodbye again," Siana smiled through her red eyes. Mark peered closely at her, standing a little too close for her comfort.

"You okay?" he asked, concerned.

She wasn't sure what it was, but her heart skipped a little beat from him standing so close. But she somehow felt he wasn't asking her the question out of concern for her sake.

"Yes, thanks, just tired. Anyway, nice to meet you, my dad will be waiting." She made to move, but he was still standing too close, so she stuck her hand out to shake his. He looked at it and because he couldn't refuse, shook it slowly whilst still looking at her.

She pulled her hand back and stood back a step to go around him, accidentally pulling her suitcase over his feet. Apologising profusely, she kept walking, almost saying sorry over her shoulder.

Yeesh, that was uncomfortable.

 

**

 

She stopped just before the exit to unlock her suitcase and pull out a massive bubble jacket that she had placed there for her arrival.

She was dying to get out of the stuffy heated airport and into the cold fresh winter air and see her dad, Mikhalis.

She zipped up and swished her way through the airport doors, her step lighter now that she was finally here. She felt the blast of chill air hit her and she breathed in a thirsty breath, feeling the chill settle deep into her lungs. As she breathed out, she watched the heat of her breath condense and make "smoke" come out of her mouth. She loved it.

She looked up and down the loading zone for her dad's svelte old Citroen. It was like a pimp mobile from the 70s, but she liked it because it was her dad's, and he loved it. It was low-slung and looked like it couldn't make it over traffic humps, but it had a big boot and liked to hug the people it carried with its cosy interior.

She couldn't see the car, but she saw her dad, in a large army surplus flak jacket, waving at her from across the thoroughfare. He was standing next to a shiny, tall, boxy four wheel drive. He ran over to her, a huge smile on his face, and gave her a big bear hug.

"My sweetheart!" He said in Greek loudly, causing bystanders to look at them. An obviously Greek, slightly hoary older man hugging a young girl of mixed asian descent.

"Yeiasou Baba!" She called him dad loudly, a little embarrassed that he had made a scene and now she was making an even louder scene. The onlookers kept looking. Well, she supposed they would wonder about her mum now. She felt so self-conscious. But, as was her habit, any thought that was even slightly negative always got replaced by something positive and happy.

Ah, why was she bothering?

She hugged him back tightly, leaning in to smell his cologne and feel his stubble on her forehead. He pulled away and took her suitcase, looking at her questioningly. She smiled.

"Mum sends her love," she said to him quietly. He nodded and took the bag across to the new car. She gawped at its shiny brilliance.

"What happened to the car?"

"She died a horrific death, gasping in the street. Don't worry! I found a new replacement straight away!" her dad joked as he loaded her case into the back. Siana hopped in the passenger seat as she undid her jacket and let it slide off her shoulders. She shut the car door and put on her seat belt.

When her dad got in and started the car, he turned to her and smiled a twinkly-eyed smile.

"Did you miss me, karthoula mou? Matia mou glykia? Omorfoula mou?" (my heart, my sweet eyes, my beauty)

"Aggh daad! No, not at all. I'm just here to make some money. And meet my future husband."

Her dad crinkled up his nose with disgust.

"But I thought boys were dirty and disgusting?"

"Well, they still are. But now I like it."

It was her dad's turn to cringe.

"Let's not talk about boys anymore, not until you are 35 like you promised."

"I made that promise when I was 5. Mum can't wait for me to find someone and have babies. You should get with the programme, Dad"

"Is she still making you sell that stuff in the shop?"

"Yes. Half of it is back orders, but those sales paid for her new shoes."

"Thrifty!"

Siana laughed. She loved joking with her Dad. He always kept things light, maybe because he never really liked to talk about things that were too serious. Even though her mum had a great sense of humour too, his unwillingness to open up about their problems eventually led to her having enough, and leaving him.

All thoughts of the sad VIXX news gone, Siana looked at her dad's profile as he drove the car out onto the highway.

He wasn't particularly handsome, though he had a strong brow and nose and beautiful light brown eyes. His hair had been salt and peppery for a few years now, and she thought it made him look better, stronger.

Yet he seemed a little smaller than she remembered him, and she felt a touch of sadness that he was here alone while she had her mum and a whole other life at home.

 

**

 

"What have you been up to, Dad?"

"Oh, the usual. It was busy over the summer. You know, Greece is cheap and tourists love to come here. But they're rowdier and younger and less respectful of their surroundings. I had to forfeit some deposits you know. Some of the units had to be upgraded because of damage."

"Seriously?"

"Nothing major, just some fighting and drunkenness."

Siana felt alarmed.

"Was anyone hurt? Did you get hurt? What would you do if someone got violent towards you?"

"I have your uncle Stratos, and all your cousins. Don't worry about me, I have all the backup I need."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. Itea is still a little town, but now everyone has a tablet or device and are a little wiser than they used to be."

"Oh I can't wait to see Itea! Has it been cold?"

"Raining and cold and dreary."

"Just how I like it! And how is everyone?"

They chatted about Stratos, her dad's brother, whose own in laws now populated the township with all her male cousins. She couldn't wait to see them.

There was Panos, her cousin closest in age, who was the youngest of them all, and his older brother George, who was away at military service now. They were Uncle Stratos' boys and were the closest to them all. Uncle Stratos had welcomed her mother into the family straightaway when the rest of the family were a little distant. Her dad's only other sibling was her Aunt Maria, whose three boys Yianni, Dimitri and Costas were a little older, one or two close to marriage.

Whenever she was in Greece when she was younger, she would play catch with them in the streets and they would go biking in the afternoons when the town was deserted during the afternoon siesta. There were vast plains of olive groves between the township and the Parnassos mountain range, and she exhausted her holidays exploring the tiny inroads with them. Adventure and physical activity made her a happy, bright and active child. It was no wonder she took up dancing, her body always needed to move and feel alive.

"So is Uncle Stratos still doing the _tsifteteli_ in the barfor Christmas?"

Her dad laughed out loud.

"You still remember that?"

"He taught me all the moves, everything I need to know!"

They both laughed heartily. Tsifteteli was the greek version of belly dancing, and like middle eastern and turkish belly dancing, could be sensual - but it was also danced by families and communities as a form of expression of the music. Although the moves involved hip popping, gyrating and waves, the ultimate intention was to feel the music, which was oriental, arabic, turkish, sentimental, sensual and had a hint of drama. She really did learn to dance it from watching all members of her family.

Like with Latin dancing, her people's particular brand of sensual dancing also crossed over into cultural dancing and was a part of their social and historical tradition - and so families and friends could be dancing quite sexy moves, but it would not be considered a come-on or a seduction.

It was a celebration of the self and of the body, and she felt free to be as expressive as she wanted to be, without fear of being seen as too sexy or lewd.

Though she knew that if the company or the atmosphere was slightly different, the dance could become intensely erotic. It always depended what the situation was, and how you acted within that situation.

Circumstances and context - they always made a difference.

 

**

 

She thought back to last Christmas when Uncle Stratos, in the heat of the moment, got up on the bar in his restaurant and started gyrating with a soulful expression on his face. Panos had immediately taken pictures and was whooping and egging him on. It ended up being a wonderful night filled with warm memories.

She texted Panos. _Will be in Itea soon. Basket?_

She immediately got a text back. _Yes! Am meeting the others at 4 at the school. Join us when you can._

She smiled. After a day of travelling, she wanted to move and sweat. She told her dad she would be out that afternoon with the cousins. He nodded, then turned to her in all seriousness.

"Just so you know, we have a long term booking starting tonight. Don't worry about it, I have prepared everything. But tomorrow onwards you need to handle most of it. Mostly being on hand to help them if they need any, because I have organised for a cleaner and they say they will handle meals on their own, except for breakfast."

"Oh, where will you be?"

Her dad smiled.

"I'm writing again, and I have a few contracts I have to finish before New Year's."

"Oh, wow that's great, dad! What is it? Jingles? Songs?"

"Yeah, mostly for ad agencies in Athens, but other things as well."

"Does that mean you have opened up the studio again?"

"Well, I don't need as much equipment as I used to, so I am working at home. The studio... well, maybe one day someone will need to hire it. Not many composers in Itea."

"You never know, some kids might form a band or something."

"Anyway, I will just leave it as it is, but if I don't start using it again, I may clear it out and make a studio apartment or something."

"Aww, wait another year, I would hate to see it go."

Siana sat back and thought about the times she had spent with her dad in that studio. She was barely ten when he made her sing for jingles he had made for kids' products, or nursery rhymes for educational videos.

She enjoyed the late nights and just being alone with him, even though she had felt guilty that her mum was alone in their home. She remembered waking up late and being teased by the boys that because she was on holiday she was acting like a princess.

Then she would run just as hard and fast as them and make them eat their words.

She opened the window a little to let some chill air in for a moment. She felt the bright mediterranean sunshine on her face, and combined with the crisp cold air, made her feel both alive and sleepy at the same time.

Her thoughts turned to the concerts she was going to miss at the end of the year. The closest venue was Singapore, a quick and relatively inexpensive trip from Kuala Lumpur, where she lived. She could easily make the money for the concert ticket, with a bit of scrimping and maybe borrowing.

She felt a little hollow inside that, by sad coincidence, she would be away visiting a place and person she loved very much, just when the concert she had been waiting for years to see, was happening back home.

She looked out at the slowly fading industrial landscape of outer Athens and spotted the odd olive tree and orange tree in the now-harvested cotton fields and vegetable orchard. The land was rocky and mountainous in places, but where there were flatlands the soil was dark and rich. Very soon she would see some old traditional houses crumbling by the roadside, then modern and stark farmhouses and businesses, built for function rather than beauty.

She anticipated the road rising up into the mountains on their approach to Delphi from the northeast, and seeing goats being shepherded along by young men in old wool cloaks with their faces buried in their mobile phones.

It was on odd, old, heavy world with flashes of quirky weird modern contrasts.

After a while, the wind became fierce as they rolled along and her hair became frenzied whipping snakes that hurt her neck and eyes. She closed the window. Her dad glanced at her for a moment.

"You okay?"

"Yeah."

"If you say so."

"I'm okay, just found out I will be missing a big concert back home."

"Oh, do you want to go home early?

Siana's heart leapt and for an instant she felt relieved that her dad might be okay with that if that was what she wanted to do.

But then she thought, in the big scheme of things, the fun and excitement of seeing the concert would fade once it was over, and she would have left her dad alone for a few hours of fun. She wanted to be honest, though, so she thought about what she wanted to say.

"Well, that would be great, but then I would miss out on another month here."

"Then come back after."

Siana shot her dad a scowling look. His comment made up her mind.

"No, that would be totally frivolous and would make me angry with myself. Don't worry, it's just a concert." She sighed dramatically and slouched into her seat. "I guess I will have to fangirl from a distance. As usual."

"Aww, honey, you're so tragic."

She smiled into her chest. She suddenly felt much, much better.

Perspective always gave her the answers she needed.

The road started to rise up into the sudden mountain range. They were approaching the Parnassus mountain range, and would pass below its peak as they went through the historic Delphi. Before that, they would go through the old town of Arachova, which was the last stop before skiers and adventure seekers would stop for supplies and nourishment on their way up to the ski resort on the mountain.

She wanted to see Arachova very much, because she had just finished watching Descendants of the Sun, in which Joongki confronts the gangsters in the town before all hell breaks loose. She recognised the municipal council building and cafes next door where they shot the scene.

When she saw the locale in the episode, she literally squealed and pointed at the screen. She used to visit there for touristy paraphernalia and a spot of glamorous cafe lounging. She knew that if the camera had just panned left a little more, it would see a tourist shop with overpriced old stock and magnets and traditional woollen shepherds' bags in the window. A little further left by a few metres was the clock tower perched on the edge of a precipice that you could walk down into via a paved walkway to view the huge crevice in between two mountainsides. It was the clock tower where he and she had had their heart to heart.

She felt enormously proud of her Arachova, even if it was only hers by proximity to Itea.

She chatted to her dad about it, her excitement growing even more as they approached. He laughingly suggested she should take a picture of the location, even though she had seen it and walked through it hundreds of times before someone ever put it onscreen.

Her eyes brightened.

"That's a great idea! Please stop, I want a picture!"

Mikhalis rolled his eyes. He was happy to see her usual cheerful self back. He worried a little when his daughter became quiet and sullen, not because he thought she was troubled, but rather because he didn't want her to feel the weight of sadness. That was for older people who had seen harder times, or at least, had been through more of life.

He gladly slowed to a stop when they came to the turn in the narrow street at the spot she told him about. The road was relatively wide until their parking spot, and then it became a bottleneck nightmare, a main street running past cafes, local artisans and ski shops through which trucks and buses would clog up traffic as they passed.

There were alternative roads to Itea, but he always took this road on their trip home for Siana's sake, because she loved it so much. Further on, past Arachova, they would turn the corner and snake past the Delphi Museum and the ruins of the Agora and the Stadio, and then they would see a large metal statue that looked like two flames making the shape of a man. Between the two metal flames, if you were approaching at just the right time, you would catch the sun glinting through like a bright burning heart. It was of Prometheus, and for him, symbolised the fighting human spirit, and sacrifice.

Just at that corner, the magnificent view of the sudden drop down to the olive groves and plains below would be revealed, with the distant Itea on the near horizon, before the calm waters of the Gulf of Corinth stretched out towards the mountain ranges on the land opposite. It was a magnificent view and he was willing to tolerate the sometimes dreary drive through Arachova tourist traffic just to see it.

He watched as Siana bounced out of the car, pulling on her jacket and readying her phone camera. She trotted over to the corner of the municipal building and posed against its red exterior. It had been red for as long as he remembered it, which was decades. He watched happily as she flashed her bright almond eyes at the camera and smiled, exposing the tiny dimple high up on her cheek. Her hair, shiny and straight, shimmied as she shook it out of her eyes. He felt she was very precious, and wanted for her not to be lonely or alone.

He noticed a bunch of school boys across the street ogling her, some even trying to catcall with their pubescent voices. He scowled at them for letting their hormones get the better of their manners. He suddenly agreed with 5-year old Siana: boys were dirty all over.

He decided that it wasn't so bad for Siana be lonely, that it wasn't the end of the world. Hard work and good meals every day can keep many people happy, why not her?

She came running back and plopped into the seat as he shifted into drive and pulled back out into traffic. Soon they were rounding the the bend at Delphi and watching the gorgeous view roll out before them. She took a picture of Metal Prometheus and murmured with pleasure as they drove up the sharp incline into the one way street in Delphi that took them above the old town.

They descended down onto a road that winded down the barren mountain face. All the way down they had a spectacular view of the valley which opened out into the sea beyond. There, she could see Itea glinting under the sun.


	2. Leo's First Day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please excuse any mistakes - Kkomae was Mr Joon or Joonie for a long time for some reason lol

Leo looked out the plane window as they approached the airport runway. Next to him VIXX's manager Kkomae slept, his head resting on his hand between them both. Leo smirked. For a little pudgy guy, he was surprisingly elegant and neat in his personal habits. He glanced behind him at Ken who was fiddling with his electronics, packing them up for landing.

"Jaehwan-ah," he said softly.

"Yea hyung?"

"Why are we doing this?"

 

"Concept. Holiday. Rest. Secret Mission."

Hyuk, who was sitting next to Ken, leaned across him to put his face in view.

 

"Is hyung tired? Do you need a health tonic? Massage?"

Leo snorted. Ken high-fived Hyuk.

"Yeah, that never gets old," Leo murmured to them. He turned back to see N walking towards him. He closed his eyes and let his head fall back. He heard N stop at his aisle and lean over to give him a lingering stroke on the cheek.

"Wake up my sleeping flower," he said loudly. Leo kept his eyes shut as he heard Hyuk and Ken snigger behind him.

Across the wide aisle he heard a croak of disgust as Hongbin said, "Oh god, stop!"

N looked up at Hongbin, who was cringing in his seat. Next to him, Ravi slept deeply, snoring.

"Don't be jealous Hongbin, you're my flower too."

Hongbin laughed, waking Ravi, who stretched with the fervour of a child, groaning loudly as he finished.

Hyuk said, "That's rude, hyung, can you restrain yourself?"

Ravi looked around with sleepy eyes, blinking.

"That was the best sleep I've had in ages."

"I'm very happy you slept well, hyung. I, on the other hand, had to listen to you singing in your sleep."

Ravi looked sheepishly at Hongbin. "But you still love me, right?"

The seat belt sign pinged on. N immediately became business-like, prodding Kkomae awake.

"Kkomae-ssi, you have all the customs forms? You've taken care of our arrival?"

Kkomae nodded as N went to his seat behind Ravi. Next to him their PA Min Seok looked out the window, sighing. N patted his hand.

"It's okay, you will be fine."

Leo put his seat upright and sat with his arms folded in his lap over his crossed legs. He was often teased for the way he sat, but the real truth of it was that as a teen he didn't know what to do with his long limbs. Crossing them kept them neat and tidy. Now, it was more of a habit than anything, as he had naturally grown to be more comfortable in his own body. Being a sportsperson, he felt at ease when his body was in action. At rest, he felt listless and insecure with his physique.

They landed and disembarked before everyone else. Although they were assured of a quiet arrival, they all covered their faces with sunglasses and face-masks and some put in their earbuds, just in case. However, just as Joonie had said, their trip through customs was quick and quiet, and they strode straight into the waiting coach without any trouble. 

They waited in the coach for a while as Min Seok brought their baggage up to it for loading with the help of two trolley handlers.

Leo settled into his seat and felt good about being able to slouch out of the airport like that. Although it was business as usual for them to be photographed and chased through airports, there were moments when standing and waiting to move became extremely awkward with people pointing their phones and cameras at them while only a few feet away. He was used to it, but it still seemed like a weird static dance with strangers.

He texted family back home, keeping it brief and short of the details. The less they knew the better, both for him, the boys and also for their privacy. All they had to know was that he was on some company trip to brainstorm for their new concept, but also primarily as a reward for their year-long promotional comebacks. He had been hoping they would send them home to their families for an extended stay, but he should have known the work never really stopped.

N sat next to him, sighing with relief.

"From now on we have a bit of quiet time. Even though we are going someplace away from the public eye, there is always the possibility that someone might recognise us. It could turn out okay, but we don't know."

Hongbin smiled. "Are we that big that we could cause a commotion enough to make us change our plans?"

N smiled. "Of course we are. But we are lucky we have a sensible fandom." Ravi and Ken looked at each other, smiling.

"Hyung, there are some crazy starlights out there too," Ravi said.

"But it's up to us and how we react that will keep the excitable ones from becoming dangerous."

Kkomae rolled his eyes and turned to N.

"Your job is to be tall, sexy, cute, charismatic and talented and to make the noonas want you for themselves and the ahjummas want you for son-in-laws. We will manage everything else."

N turned to the boys proudly. "You see? Nothing could be easier."

Hyuk joked, "Be careful not to grow shorter, everyone. That would really mess things up!"

Ravi snorted, "We're prostitutes."

"Slaves," laughed Hongbin.

N rolled his eyes. "Then everyone who gains fame and success by giving people what they want is a slave or prostitute."

"Hey, I never said I didn't like it," Ravi settled back with a smile.

Leo shook his head, smiling at the others. He was still surprised by N's positivity and strange self-confidence. He often set himself up for ridicule, but he always trooped through it impervious to any form of attack. In that way, he never allowed even the most bitter or personal attacks on him to sour the mood. And many a time, this deflected away from the others, often saving them from having to answer deeply personal questions.

Himself, on the other hand, still didn't really know how to handle the sometimes veiled attacks on his demeanour, or their group. Although he was confident and relaxed now on camera, there were still times when he felt he couldn't read a situation or catch the tone of what someone was saying, and often ended up getting into awkward, drawn-out and jumbled conversations where he couldn't figure out the gist of someone's words.

Still, he had a deep trust for his company and for his group mates, something that came to him naturally from playing team sports.

Even when someone let the ball drop, it was a matter of picking it up no matter what and driving the game forward. That was natural to him, he was good at it, and it made him feel useful and alive. He enjoyed being good at what he did, and liked being acknowledged for it. This was also a source of discomfort for him because the need for acknowledgement and adoration conflicted with his natural introversion. He simply didn't know how to be completely natural in highly unnatural situations like press conferences and fan meets. Personal appearances were downright torture for him. Well, they had been. It was getting easier now.

He realised he owed a lot to his brothers, who had playfully and angrily guided and forced him through tough situations, till finally he seemed to learn and find some modicum of relaxation in those situations. He owed a lot to N, who set himself up for the fall by becoming the easy target on variety shows - thus letting the others relax, knowing they wouldn't be bearing the brunt of it.

Variety shows were weird. The hosts could seem both friendly and critical. He knew they were just doing their job, and some may even have producers talking in their in-ear, guiding or pushing for a result on camera. To a certain extent, they were doing the same thing, playing out a public persona on camera that fans and audiences wanted.

Although they repeatedly thanked their fans for their support, he knew the real relationship here was between the company who was risking money on them as a product, and the fans, who had to be kept happy in order to sustain their livelihood. But the fans were really only engaging with them, the product, and he sometimes felt he wanted a freedom he would never have as a pop idol.

He peered at his brothers, all of whom were gazing out at the landscape as they sped along the highway. He was sure they had all felt that at some point or other. 

He knew, though, that besides talent and ability, it was opportunity that created the mix that led to success. And he couldn't have created the opportunity he had by himself. For that, he owed the company, his group and the fans a great part of his success.

He put on some music and stared out the window for a while. After a few years of travelling, every new landscape seemed just like any other he had seen. From any highway, cities looked dirty or pretty or industrial or quaint. Here was no different. He closed his eyes and let the music take him into his thoughts.

**

Itea was a young town, only a hundred or so years old, established by the French and named after the local willow trees. Unlike its neighbours, towns which jumbled across their terrain organically, Itea was an ordered, wide and airy sort of town, with long wide avenues and boulevards set in a grid, and boasting a huge boardwalk and jetty that stretched out into the bay.

Ships often docked on their way to or from the Corinth Canal, and would enjoy perfectly still waters on their journey. Itea was a port town, and the boardwalk - which was really a splendid marble and stone-paved esplanade on the waterfront - boasted cafes, customs and supplies outlets, eateries and family-owned hotels.

Although the neighbouring towns were in the olive and other agrarian businesses, Itea was about the sea and visitors and the sun.

Siana loved it so much.

Finally they were driving through the flatlands and olive groves, on a small highway that cut through on an almost direct route to Itea. From being high above the land, as if soaring like birds, they were suddenly buried deep in trees, which swayed in the small breeze. The trees made a surprisingly loud noise, like spraying water, and their tiny sage and silver leaves turned and swirled, looking like schools of anchovy in the sea.

She felt like she was underwater, and the emptiness of the road made it all feel so surreal and dreamy.

They reached the outskirts of the town and began a series of turns towards their home. A system of one-way streets made a direct approach impossible, so they twisted and turned through the street grid, past cousins' houses, churches and bakeries until they came out at one end of the esplanade near the end of the town. 

She caught a glimpse of the still sea on her right as they turned left to go to the end of the road. There, her father's apartment building stood nestled among other older and newer buildings.

They pulled up and parked right outside. She got out into the cool air and brought her bag out. Mikhalis unloaded her case and they walked into the lobby together. The small lift typical of older buildings, was just big enough to accommodate them with her case, and they ascended to the third floor where she would be staying.

Her dad pulled out the key and let them into the studio apartment, which opened straight into the living room space which was wide enough for a narrow sofa bed and tv console, a small kitchenette to the left and beyond a dividing wall, a spacious bedroom with adjoining bathroom.  
Although she didn't spend the whole year here, Mikhalis kept it closed to visitors, so it was completely her space, which she had made a home.

He rolled the bag into her bedroom and went to turn on the thermostat for the water heating. He shouted at her to remember to turn off the heater before she got into the shower. She smiled as she opened the living room shutters which opened out into her own narrow balcony overlooking the back yard below. 

She didn't have a view of the street in front, but the view at the back of the building was stunning. Whilst the apartment block faced the sea, the back of it faced the olive groves and beyond, the spectacular mountain range which boasted the peak of Mount Parnassos.

Below, she saw the backyard which was paved but had geraniums, roses and an old grapevine growing out of planters around the edges. The grapevine had a few straggly bunches of grapes, and though they were sparse, were fragrant and sweet. Her father's apartment opened out into the yard and she would often see him pottering about or having a drink, seated at the rusting outdoor table by his back door.

She looked beyond the perimeter of their yard to see a small neighbourhood orange tree grove, a scrap metal yard and a smattering of old apartment blocks and even older traditional buildings reaching outwards towards the mountain ranges. 

At one point the town turned into dark green olive trees that looked like a murky blanket over the feet of the mountain. The bare mountain face they had just driven down glinted in the sun. In the evening during the sunset, the white snows of Parnassos turned orange and pink until at last darkness covered the land.

She heard her father come into the kitchen and peek out the doors at her.

"You going out?"

"Oh, yeah, I'm meeting Panos. At the school."

"Watch out for bandits."

Siana laughed.

"Okay. When are the guests arriving?"

"Later around midnight. Can you stay up to help me?"

"Sure. What's happening for dinner?"

"Whatever you want."

"If you're gonna work then I will eat out with the boys. I can bring you something."

"No, I'm fine. Don't be too late."

He gave her a warm hug.

"Welcome back, karthoula mou."

"Thanks Dad."

After Mikhalis left, Siana quickly changed out of her soft slacks and boots and put on some leggings and joggers. She knew she would be getting sweaty but needed to keep warm, so she pulled a body-fitting long-sleeved top over her body tank, then a thin windcheater. 

Tying her sneakers on tightly, she grabbed her bubble jacket and looked for the set of keys she knew would be hanging in a cuckoo clock they had by the door. There was no cuckoo and it wasn't a clock either, it just had a faux face which opened to reveal hooks for keys to hang. She smiled. 

Her father had let her buy the ugly thing when she was younger and now insisted that she should live with it.

She got the keys out and carefully closed the door. In Greece, vestiges of the old times remained and the afternoon siesta was still a must for many people. Nowadays, she found more and more younger people used that quiet time to do things unbothered by their adults.

She ran down the three flights of stairs to the lobby and turned left outside to access the door that led round the building to the back yard. Unlocking it, she found a small open air shed that housed a few old and rusting bikes. Her dad kept them for guests to borrow and also for her to use to get around town. She pulled out the largest one, which was now a little low for her. It was teal, with a white seat and girly handles, a little old school and heavy, but she preferred it over a new one. It reminded her of happy days.

She locked up and pulled it out into the street. She put on her jacket and pedalled straight down til she got to the esplanade and headed down towards the pier. There was no traffic, but she knew there were many errant drivers who didn't really watch where they were going, so she kept to the sides, avoiding the gutters and badly parked vehicles. She turned right at the pier, following the central main street down past the main church and out towards the school that was on the outskirts of the town.

Here she crossed the highway and cycled towards the gate entrance. She could already see the tall, blonde Panos towering over the rest of her stocky, dark-haired cousins.

He saw her and opened his hands, italian gangster-style, as if to say, "Where have you been?"He lifted his chin up, hoodlum-style. His face reminded her of JRE's stank face he did on youtube whenever he saw something he loved.

She laughed and swung her leg off the bike, running to a stop and parking it against the kerb with the pedal. She ran in the gate up to the boys. Panos stepped forward and took her into a bearhug.

"Hello Cousin!" he yelled in Greek, putting her into a headlock, smothering her with his jacket. She came up spluttering.

"Nice bouffant jacket."

"Panos stepped back and smoothed front of his pillowy jacket proudly.

"My mama wants me to keep warm," he beamed.

She turned to hug Yianni and Dimitri, who were a few years older than her. They both had pale skin and black eyes and hair, although she knew that in the summer they tanned to a dusky olive colour . By contrast, Panos was pale but with a shock of straw coloured hair, like his mum's. She marvelled at the differences between them.

She remembered a young Panos boasting at a family gathering that the original Greeks were mountain dwellers with blonde hair, and that they only became darker because of migration from the Middle East and Asia Minor.

Her dad and Stratos laughed good-naturedly, calling themselves tainted. It's funny how people thought of themselves as unique to others.

Dimitri rolled a basketball between his hands, looking her up and down.

"You been practising back there in China?"

She smacked him, laughing. It was a running joke between them, that people everywhere seemed to think all Asians were Chinese. He himself was like that until she taught him better.

They were only little when he had called her Chinese, and she had turned on him with a glint in her eye and said, "You can call me Chinese. Back home, my friends think the Mediterranean is Italy, so, I suppose it's okay."

Panos and Yianni had laughed at Dimitri, patting her on the back and then pretending to kick him. Her child's logic had made sense. He got the hint very quickly, and they soon became her backup whenever the local kids brought up her Asian heritage in a rude way. She didn't mind so much. It was highly unusual at the time, for a local boy like her dad to marry outside of the country, let alone outside of the village.

She had grown up surrounded by a caring community, even though they needed a little educating sometimes. The result of it was, she was welcomed and recognised here when she returned, but she knew that they still had misconceptions about Asians, and had very little knowledge about the cultural and racial distinctions between Asian countries and peoples. Well, she couldn't expect them to, just like she wouldn't expect her Sabahan relatives to know all the history and culture of Greece. So she was happy to explain when needed, but she didn't take it personally when people spoke out of ignorance.

"Yes, I have been practising. You know, I have these new things that help me run. They're called shoes." She kicked the side of his leg. He yelped.

"Oh, you still crying when girls hit you? You must cry all the time."

Yianni and Panos laughed, nodding.

"It's true, he's always whining!" Yianni snickered. Dimitri threw the ball at him.

They played two on two, trying out flashy run ups and shots, all the while chatting and ribbing each other. She loved this, the verbal sparring and the joking, the put-downs and the laughing. She loved moving, especially after cramped travelling, testing the limits of her body and her endurance.

She began to sweat, and had already stripped off her jacket. She took off her wind cheater and felt the chill air on her neck. She knew she couldn't stay like this for long as the evening air was getting colder and a sea wind was coming in from the bay. 

They played a little longer, then the boys began to look at their watches.

**

Leo awoke with a start when he felt the coach lurch to a stop.

He heard bells, and looked out onto the road before them. Outside, a herd of goats trotted by, their bells clanking merrily whilst they took their time to walk ahead of the coach. 

The odd goat would look at him, its weird eyes making it look like it had the face of a demon. 

Leo felt a chill run through his body, and he sat up to look around. He looked outside and saw that they were high up on a mountain, looking down on the valley below. 

In the distance he saw a body of water, still, like a huge lake, looking like a pink mirror under the setting sun.

It was magnificent. He gazed out at it while his playlist changed songs and Kim Kwang Seok's "Love that is Too Painful is Not Love". Although he had seen many beautiful places, he had never seen anything quite like this before, with the sun just at the right moment making magic. 

The sad strains of the music and the lonely voice of the artist gave the scene a poignant tone, and he suddenly felt homesick, not for a place, not for a person, but for a feeling.

He turned to wake N, but found him already peering over his shoulder at the beautiful view. N's eyes were sombre, almost sad. Their eyes met, and for a moment Leo acknowledged that, in spirit, he and N were true friends from the beginning.

He heard Hyuk and Ken's exclamations as they noticed the view too, and soon, everyone was awake and taking pictures, and the quiet sentimentality of the trip took on a carnivalesque vibe. Leo felt a little overstimulated and turned towards the window, watching the various scenes unfold as the bus edged its way down the face of the mountain.

Evenutally, the bus lurched out of the olive groves on to the main road that led to town. Leo looked out to see the entrance to a large cemetery nestled against the foot of a small hill to their right. They passed a school and he saw a group of boys on the basketball court. 

The tall blonde one caught his eye, as he was hugging a girl whose hoodie obscured her face. He could see her pony tail of straight dark hair as it spilled out onto her shoulder. 

She pulled back as the blonde guy straightened out his jacket, beaming at her proudly.

"Hey, we should play basketball," Ken exclaimed. Everyone got excited, staring out at the kids on the court, but then they passed by and didn't see the game start.

Leo looked down at his phone. Besides his family, the only physical contact he had with others was with the boys, or with people he worked with. He thought back to times when he was still in school, dating. He smirked. What did he know of caring for someone back then?

N nudged him. He looked up to see that annoying face that always seemed to know so much. He kept his expression impassive. Finally he asked, "What?"

"Your thoughts are all over your face. Don't you know what I'm thinking?"

"Will you leave me alone if I ask?"

"Never, sweet child," N said, suddenly putting his arms around Leo and gripping him in a deadlock, arms pinned by his sides. Leo let him waggle him back and forth, closing his eyes in resignation.

"I love how you hug me back, it makes me feel so good." N smiled at him. He snorted, a small smile curling up his lip.

"Leo-hyung, you cannot encourage this behaviour, it spreads to all of us," said Hyuk from the back.

"You are the worst one, Hyuk," N said, fixing him with a glare.

"I learned from the best," Hyuk said. N smiled, smug and happy.

"Ten points for Hyukkie!" N released Leo and looked at him with eyebrows raised. Leo smiled a little. He knew N was trying to lighten his mood. All the big gestures, the teasing, the cringey behaviour... N only did it for someone else's benefit. The more teaseable N was, the less heat others got. It was the way he worked. Leo himself knew he had escaped some situations he didn't want to be in because N had noticed, and under the pretence of trying to grab the limelight, had turned the focus away from him. 

For someone who put himself out there as self-aggrandising and narcissistic, N was really surprisingly observant and knew how to handle situations and people just right. Unlike himself, who couldn't read people and had trouble keeping up with the changes in tone in his everyday exchanges with others. He felt he had learned a lot from N, and at the very least, felt grateful to him.

"I'm okay, just tired."

"And sad and depressed and feeling like you will never know the heat of love again?"

Hyuk and Ken started hooting from the back.

"Did someone say love?" Hongbin asked sleepily as he stared out the window with dead eyes. Ravi laughed at him. N stood up and leaned against the seat in front, facing the boys to make sure everyone was listening.

"Listen, children! We're all doing this to work, and as luck would have it, we seem to like each other and work well together. Love has to take a back seat for now, right? There are many ways to handle feelings of loneliness, like having good friends, channeling our energies into creativity, establishing good professional relationships for the benefit of our future, learning our way through life and up the ladder of success-"

Hyuk and Ken were nodding their heads like obedient students, while Ravi and Hongbin looked at each other and smirked. They were all playing along with N, who was reciting the same old spiel he rolled out whenever he was in pep-talk mode. It was an in-joke that only their little group understood: Know It All N, who really was a know it all and could make fun of himself about it anyway.

Hyuk put up his hand and interrupted N, all innocent eyes and seriousness.

"But hyung, how do we handle all those other things, like butterflies in the stomach, and twitching muscles, and itchy lips and fingers, and-"

Ken and the others started sniggering. They knew what he was referring to. Their natural physical urges that often visited. They were young males after all. But Hyuk kept the deadpan face, looking at N for the answer. N smiled knowingly and nodded.

"Ah, yes, those physical feelings, like feeling nervous, or itchy, or all twisty up inside, which sometimes come when you are thinking of girls, or being with a girl, or GETTING MARRIED too soon and spoiling all our plans for Vixx, right?"

Ravi and Hongbin started laughing. Leo couldn't help but smile. N continued.

"Well, by their everyday behaviour I already know that Ken and Ravi have very good ideas about how to handle those physical feelings. Even Hongbin, but he is not a dirty sort of boy like them. Even our Leo here," he gripped Leo's shoulder for effect. Leo doubled over as if in pain. "...may have some good advice about what to do when you feel so overcome by the natural physical symptoms of love that it's as if you feel your whole self is going to explode out of your body, right Leo-ssi?"

Leo nodded, giggling, as he tried to disengage N's deathgrip on his shoulder, who then put his other hand on his other shoulder and started pushing him back and forth, establishing a rhythm, like he was kneading dough, or something. Leo alternated between putting his hands up as a barrier between them and trying to lever off the pincer-like grip N had on him.

"You see, when I get those feelings, Hyukkie, and you should listen carefully now, it would be natural to try to take matters into my own hands, you know?"

Ravi and Ken were cackling, and Hongbin had his face buried in Ravi's shoulder as he shook silently with laughter.

"But I realise that this isn't a problem I should handle on my own, that I need help and I should turn to someone or something that will help soothe my body and de-stress me. You hear me, boys?"

N looked down at Leo as he pushed him back into the seat, leaning over him ominously. Leo was giggling, but red with the humiliation he was dishing out. N smiled menacingly for effect, although inside he was happy that he was cheering Leo up.

"This is why I make candles and arrange flowers! Okay?!" He finally finished with a groan, his eyes crazy, as he let go of Leo and let him fall back into his seat. Hyuk let out a roar of laughter and the boys in the back fell about laughing. N flopped into his seat next to Leo as if he was spent, then whacked him gently in the chest. Leo looked at him with his twinkling half-moon eyes as he grinned.

"You think too much, friend," N said quietly, still smiling. Leo nodded, the smile still lingering. He turned to face out the window, enjoying the gentle silence that often followed their bouts of laughter. It was as if they had exercised an old muscle, and relaxation was settling in.

He caught a glimpse of the sea as they turned into a small road and stopped outside the building they were going to spend the next few weeks in. He got out of the bus and stretched his long legs, breathing in the fresh cold sea air.

He looked around as all the boys trundled out of the bus. N stood next to him and smiled.

"Now you know why I have sooo many candles," he said with a big smile.

Ravi laughed aloud and put his arm around N as they walked in.

"Candle-making sounds fun," he laughed.

Hyuk thumped Leo on his back as he walked by.

"Hyung, I still don't understand, maybe you can shed more light for me?"

Leo kicked him as he walked on, and missed. He let momentum carry him forward into the building.

The landlord, a Mr Mikhalis, was already talking to KKomae in the lobby. He asked them if they could go up ahead on their own. Hyuk took the key and pushed for the lift. There was a glass panel in the door which was illuminated by the light within. They opened the heavy door to find that it was barely bigger than an airplane toilet cubicle, and about as tall as they were. 

Hyuk got in, followed by Binnie. Ken tried to get in too, but N held him back by the scruff of his neck.

"Let the rabble go on ahead to prepare the way, young Ken."

Hyuk and Hongbin stared impassively at Ken as N let the door swing shut and they started their gentle journey up to the fourth floor.  
Ken turned to smile at N. Leo looked around and saw they were right next to the staircase. Without a word, he turned and took the stairs, three at a time. He reached their floor before the lift arrived, and was happy to see the surprised look on Hongbin's face when he exited the lift and saw him there. 

It still gave him a thrill to surprise people, mostly because winning anything with Hyuk and N around was almost impossible nowadays. They outstripped him physically and mentally, and made him miss the straightforward team games where people just had to be good at playing by the rules.

Hyuk, on the other hand, could see Leo's chest heaving under that cool demeanour. When he caught Leo's eye, he smiled a tight-lipped smile that promised future ribbing and teasing. Leo sharpened his gaze at Hyuk as he came forward to open the door.

He opened it and let Hongbin walk through, then sidestepped Leo's foot which was intended to trip him, smoothly entering their new abode. Leo gave up on trying, and walked in behind Hyuk.

They all stood for a moment, in awe.

They had the perfect view of all the bay of Itea and the Pelopponese mountain range beyond.

The place was simple, all white walls and white marble flooring, completely open plan except for the tiny vestibule to their left into which all the rooms opened. To their right, the living area spread towards the three sets of balcony doors, whose shutters had been opened to let in the evening sun.  
They could see sky, peachy and dewy in the fading sunlight, the still waters of the bay and the esplanade in the distance towards the right. Hyuk and Hongbin immediately went to open the doors and were exclaiming with delight. Leo let them go while he walked through the living area, only to find that beyond to the right, there was an even larger more casual living area with a huge stone fireplace and more large windows and doors that looked out towards the mountain range they had just journeyed down.

The mountain face was now a dusky pink and he could see the white snowcap of Mount Parnassus, tinged a pinky orange under a now darkening sky. Soft twinkling stars were emerging even while there was still a faint light from the sun, and the whole vista had a magical quality he couldn't have imagined.

If he kept going right, he would walk into a large kitchen with an ensuite laundry room tucked into the back. There was a tiny breakfast table in the middle of it which he knew wouldn't fit even two of them. He walked into the kitchen and found the pristine white marble countertops to be taller than he expected, and a perfect fit for him, although he hoped he wouldn't be expected to be responsible for all their meals.

He came back out of the kitchen, retracing his steps, to see Hyuk and Hongbin hanging over the narrow balcony's railing, looking straight down.

They were calling out to Min Seok, who was parked directly below and unloading the bus.

Leo walked by and into the vestibule to check out the rooms. He heard the lift coming up as he peered into the open doors of each bedroom. To the right were two rooms facing the street below, each with two single beds, built-ins and their own doors or windows which opened onto the single long and narrow balcony.

In the middle, a bathroom with a shower, which he supposed would be for the two bedrooms to share. To the left, the master with a massive double bed and a private ensuite.

My room, he thought decisively, wishing he wouldn't have to share.

This room had a window and one set of doors opening out onto a small private balcony. There was enough extra space for an extra bed, but he was hoping against hope that the decision would be made to rent another apartment so that they would all get a modicum of individual privacy.

He opened the doors and went out onto the balcony. The mountain view was magnificent, and he wished he could just step off the ledge and soar into the sky towards the wild mountains. He looked below to see their building had a small yard that backed onto other small yards that were either used for businesses or orchards. 

He could see the olive groves, so close by, that extended deep into the crevices at the foot of the mountains several kilometres away. To the left, he saw a small byzantine church, and further towards the centre of town, the much larger main church which they had passed on the way. To the right, he saw a few buildings making up the end of the town, and the bare rock-face of another smaller mountain range which seemed to curve round the town like the arms of a giant buried chest-deep in the earth.

He heard N come into the room, calling for him. When he came out onto the balcony, he gasped in wonderment at the view.

"We need another apartment," Leo said quietly. N looked at him in surprise.

"It will be cosier if we all stay together."

"I want this room alone."

"Me too and Me and ME," said N, turning to face Leo, their eyes taking on a serious gaze. Leo could see N didn't like the idea of changing anything. He wondered for a moment what could change N's mind.

"You and I would have to share one bathroom with at least two of the others. Either Ravi, or Ken, or Hyuk or Hongbin. Or Kkomae or Min Seok," he said, slowly, deliberately.  
N's gaze wavered.

"We need another apartment." N said, matter-of-factly. "I'll speak to Joonie." He turned immediately to look for Kkomae.

"I want this room."

"Don't push your luck."

"I want this room."

"Alright."

Leo smirked a little as N left the room. He followed N inside, leaving the door open to chill the room, and walked through to the vestibule. He could see the boys shedding their outer clothing and draping themselves languidly over the living room furniture, already getting comfy.

 

**

It was already dark, the sun long sinking below the watery horizon to the west, when Siana asked her cousins if they wanted to hang and have dinner. They all begged off, saying they were expected home by their families. She nodded, wishing their families well and promising to meet again soon. 

She knew she would be seeing Panos regularly because he would be helping her with guests whenever they wanted tour logistics taken care of, like car rentals and day tour packages. At the hotel, he and his dad Stavros were the PR reps and would do on a larger scale what she would do on a tiny scale. Basically, when she couldn't handle a job, she would call in Panos for help.

She got on the bike after saying goodbye and cycled back the way she came. When she hit the esplanade she stopped by a small grill joint that made gyros and bought herself one, the Greek version of kebabs and shawarmas. The owner knew her dad and asked after her and welcomed her back. She took the tightly wrapped package and put it in her jacket pocket, and in no time she was cycling back home.

She was already cooling down, but drying sweat made her feel sticky and her hair, tied up during the game, was getting everywhere and slicking to her skin. She felt like she had ropes clinging to her neck as strands stuck to her. She approached the house, seeing a white minibus parked at the front. A man was unloading baggage from the back of it onto the pavement in front of their front door.

She thought her dad said they would be coming later that night.

They must have arrived early. Her dad would be handling it alone when he had expected to have her helping him. 

She had no time to spare. She just parked the bike by the kerb and ran up to the door. The guy handling the baggage looked up and saw her in surprise. She smiled and said hello. He replied in english, so she asked him if they had all gone upstairs already. He nodded and pointed to the lobby. 

She peered in to see her dad waiting with another man for the lift. They were talking, slowly in english, but from what she could hear her father was struggling with the man's accent.

She quickly approached them, checking her gyros was still in her pocket as she sauntered over.

Mikhalis looked up with obvious relief on his face.

"Siana, you might be able to understand better. They arrived early, and are very tired so they just want to rest. There's eight of them."  
Siana's eyes widened.

"Eight? Is there enough space for you all in the penthouse?" She turned to look at the man with her dad. She immediately saw there was something familiar about him, as if she had seen his type before. She supposed he reminded her of golf club members she saw when she used to visit the club with her grandmother back when they were living in Sabah.

The man seemed to peer at her closely, which she supposed would be normal, since she realised that to him, she looked like the one other Asian he had seen here in this tiny port town full of Greek people.

"There are four single beds and a double bed in the penthouse. Won't you need more space? We can arrange for extra beds or you may find it better to rent a separate smaller apartment. Anyway, where is everyone else?"

The man pointed at the lift. She could see it was engaged and on the way up.

"Lift too small."

She almost smiled. As they say, think of something often enough and it manifests. Her mind had been on Koreans all during her trip, and suddenly, here stood one in her building.

"You're Korean? Annyeong Haseyo." She said with a small bow. The man looked surprised and relieved all at the same time, and was about to say something when she continued in English.

"But my Korean is very rusty, so I hope we can converse in both languages?"

They heard the whirring of the lift stop and upstairs, the sound of the heavy door being swung open. Because the stairway to all the floors opened straight onto each floor lobby, the sound carried and echoed all the way down. She heard male voices exclaiming as they exited the lift and let the door slam shut. 

She reached over and called the lift down.

It whirred back into action, and she heard another exclamation of surprise when the people upstairs they noticed the lift leave immediately.

She looked at the little man and smiled.

"First time in Greece?"

"Yes. We are all on working vacation. So, must not be disturbed. Yes?"

Siana smiled. This was the kind of guest she liked - people who wanted to be left alone.

"Sure. Is there anything I can do for you now? Do you need me to take you up?"

"No, Mr Mikhalis will do that."

Siana looked at her dad and wondered if he had eaten. He wouldn't have had time with this early arrival. She pulled out the gyros in her pocket and asked him in Greek if he wanted it. His eyes lit up and he took it gladly.

"But what about you?" Mikhalis asked her.

"I can go back out after I shower." She turned to the man. "What about you, sir, can I arrange for your dinner? Would you all like to go out?"

The man seemed to take a long sniff in the air, and his eyes settled on the gyros whose rich aroma must have attacked his senses. Siana smiled.  
"I can get some for you."

The man nodded fervently, he was practically salivating. He reached into his wallet, but Mikhalis stopped him.

"Any requests you make will be billed, since your company made a generous deposit. If you have any questions please ask Siana. I will give you her number as well. She is on call until midnight every night, to help all our guests. Siana, I will call Yiorgo to place the order. You just go and pick it up, okay? Then you can take it up to the penthouse."

Siana nodded and watched her dad text her number to the man.

The lift arrived and she held the door open for them to go in. She smiled as it closed then turned to see the lone baggage handler wheeling in bags. She went to help him bring them to the lift, but he waved her off and practically pushed her hands off the bags she touched. She smiled and nodded, relieved that she could leave it up to him. She trotted past the lift to sprint up the three flights of stairs to her flat. Upstairs she heard the front door was open and several male voices calling to each other, some tired, some energetic.

The lift stopped and she heard it open for her father and the guest as she went into her flat and closed the door.

**

Kkomae walked in with Mr Mikhalis, with N by their side. It was obvious that they were already worried about how small the penthouse was for the eight of them. Min Seok came in behind them, rolling in a couple of bags. Leo saw that one was his, so he stepped forward to take it out of Min Seok's hands.

Seokkie smiled gratefully, then realised that he wasn't getting any extra help as Leo disappeared into the room and shut the door behind him. 

They all heard him turn the old-fashioned key in the lock, which screeched with resistance, the metal cold and sticking.

N turned to look at Kkomae with an expression that said, "I told you so."

Kkomae turned to Mikhalis and after a moment of hesitation, nodded. Then he asked which two or three people would move to another apartment on a lower floor. Ravi and Hongbin looked at each other and Hyuk. They all turned to Kkomae as Ravi said, "Ken will join you."

Ken stuck his head in from the balcony, "Did someone say my name?"

Kkomae waved him over, slinging a short arm around Ken's neck as he pulled him towards the front door. He couldn't quite reach, so what was supposed to be a friendly arm around the shoulder turned into a weird neck-grip.

"We're gonna have a great time," he said, smiling at Ken. Ken smiled at the boys as he was dragged out.

Ravi shook his head as Hyuk said, "Like a little lost lamb."

**

Siana stripped off everything except her leggings and her body tank and bundled the clothes into a basket that stood by the bathroom door. She turned off the thermostat, thankful that despite the cold flat, her shower would be warm and her body would feel good and clean in no time. Inside the bathroom, she got naked and turned on the water which took an age to run warm. This was her first shower in almost 24 hours and the water felt good, as did the scrubbing and lathering with the cheap, beer-scented shampoo she had only ever found in Greece and loved so much.

She showered quickly and dried off in her bedroom, which was now getting heated with the central heating system. The building was old and so had radiators which turned on at the same time each evening, then off in the early hours of the morning. She usually dried her delicates and towels on the radiators, and the moisture they gave off as they dried humidified her tiny apartment throughout the night. Nifty!

She opened up her drawers to find all her clothes as they were when she last left. Rows of leggings, tank tops, long sleeved body tops and socks and underwear. It was like a uniform she always wore, on top of which she would layer more interesting pieces under her jacket.

She dressed quickly and grabbed a soft sweater and tracksuit pants from the cupboard. She dried her hair cursorily, loving how fresh it felt still wet. If it were windy, she would blow dry it to feel warmer, but even in the winter, she liked going out with her damp hair.

Soon she was back out the door again and sailing down the stairs. She hopped on the bike that was still where she left it and cycled back to the grill joint. 

Yiorgos saw her approaching and trundled out with two large bags of gyros, fries, a raw cabbage and carrot salad drenched in olive oil and vinegar, a whole roast chicken and two large bottles of soft drink. She hoisted these on to each handle bar, and although heavy, she kept a steady pace and got back home with the food.

She took the lift up to the penthouse and rang the doorbell.

The little man opened the door, now in one of the fluffy bathroom robes they provided in the bathrooms. His eyes brightened when he saw the food, but he kept the door jammed with his leg, as if to stop her from coming in. She noted that and wondered why he would assume she would do that. She supposed it was a habit of his.

She heard several male voices round the corner to the right, where the large living area was. She saw the luggage guy come over, and he helped to take the bags from her. 

She bowed politely, saying "annyeong-hi jumuseyo." Then she turned to leave, but not before she heard the voices die down at her greeting. She heard the little man say something as if to explain, to the others inside. Before the door even closed, she was already sprinting down the stairs to her father's flat below.

He opened the door before she could ring the bell.

"That was quick."

She held up a tightly wrapped gyro and stepped inside.

"Have you eaten, dad?"

"Yes I have, but I will sit with you. Outside?"

"Of course!"

"You crazy thing, it's freezing out there! Okay, you talked me into it." He joked, pulling on his old flak jacket.

They walked to the back of the house through his kitchen and out into the small balcony that faced directly onto the yard. He picked up two tumblers from the kitchen counter along with a small bottle of home-brewed retsina.

They stepped down into the yard and settled at the wrought iron table and old cafe chairs that were too upright and rickety to really be comfortable. She unwrapped her gyros as her dad poured their wine.

She didn't realise how hungry she was. She tore at the wrapping on her food and proceeded to wolf down the delicious grill-toasted gyros bread, the tender chicken with tomatoes, onions, feta cheese and a garlic mayo that was to die for. She stopped after a few bites to breathe and take a sip of the crisp, bitter, pine-scented wine that cut through the grease on her palate and refreshed her.

Mikhalis watched her for a moment, then began chatting about the guests.

"They turned up early because they took an earlier flight than expected. They seem to want to be left alone and the organiser Mr Joon, you know the guy you met? Well, he says they might reconsider the cleaner-"

Siana looked up in surprise. "But Maria will be expecting work, how can we cancel with her?"

"They agreed to pay anyway, for the inconvenience of cancelling. Either they are silly rich or really want privacy."

"But can they manage the place? Aren't they staying for a few weeks? They have to go out sometime. Tourists always get noticed here, especially if they aren't European. Do they want to stay indoors the whole time?"

Siana rolled her eyes. Sometimes people with money had such an opinion of themselves.

She stopped that thought. Those people with money had made her family into people with money too. Okay, I take that back, she thought.

Mikhalis looked at her conspirationally and leaned in to whisper to her.

"They're either famous, or models. Whatever they are, they look like both. And Mr Joon is holding all the money, like he's some sort of tour operator in charge of a group."

Suddenly they heard the screech of screen doors being opened up at the fourth floor. They both looked up to see someone step out and peer into the darkness outside. The bright patio light shone in her eyes, so she shielded them with one hand. They watched as the shadowy figure eventually looked down, and then turn to another figure she hadn't noticed was already standing outside in the dark, to speak.

She realised that whoever it was could possibly have heard all their conversation. With bald-faced bravado, she waved at them, to acknowledge their presence. Then she turned back to her dad, embarrassed. She was happy her face was hidden from above when her still-drying hair fell about her face.

She heard someone murmur "Hello," from above and she let her dad acknowledge that with a nod. Finishing quickly, she gathered up the wrappings and the glasses and went back inside.

"You coming in?" She asked her dad. He took a deep breath and looked out into the darkness for a moment.

"No I think I will stay out here a while."

Siana came back out to give him a warm hug and kiss.

"Thank you," she whispered into his ear. He beamed up at her kindly, then blew her a kiss while she was still in his arms. She smiled and let go, hopping up onto the balcony to let herself out.

She was back in her house again. Off came all the clothes, and she slipped into an old tracksuit which would be her pyjamas. It was now almost 9pm, and she was starting to feel drowsy from jet lag. But, for one last look, she put on her bubble jacket and opened her balcony door to sit on the lone chair that faced the mountains.

Now in the dark, she couldn't see anything, except for the lights below and her father still sitting at the table, and there on the distant mountain, a twinkling partial view of a few of Delphi's lights nestled on the mountain face. She got up to switch off the kitchen light inside, thus making it easier for her eyes to adjust to the darkness outside. Soon, under the meagre starlight she began to see the outline of the mountains against the sky, and the gorges and grooves in the land.

She sighed, the busy-ness of the last 24 hours finally melting away as she felt sleep coming. The happiness of being back, seeing her wonderful cousins and being outdoors and active, and finally eating well and feeling full, made her forget all the silly thoughts she had had about missing out on the VIXX concert.

What did that matter in the big scheme of things? If she went to the concert, she would likely only see them from afar. If she were lucky to be chosen for a fan meet or high-touch, those seemed to her to be tiresomely inadequate opportunities to get to know the boys.

She rather felt it would be better to accidentally meet them on the street while they were touring her city, and to have a real encounter and exchange some proper words of communication. Or even better, she thought fancifully, be working with them, or have the same circle of friends. She would discuss dance techniques with N and then they would play basketball after. Ravi would ask her opinion on his latest project, and she would suggest music to him. With Leo, she would...

She stopped for moment, cocking her head. What would she do with him?

She remembered her daydream and his face coming in close as he bent over her to press all the lift buttons. She groaned and put her feet up on the balcony rail.

She imagined that instead, he bent over her to make her fall back against the wall, put his hands on her waist and dropped a soft kiss on her lips. When he pulled back, he stared so deeply into her eyes she felt she was falling into them.

"Oh god," she said breathily. Siana snatched her feet back from the rail and stood up noisily, shaking off her thoughts. Below, her father looked up in alarm, calling out if she were okay.

She leaned on the rail and peered down at him, smiling sheepishly.

"I'm fine, I just lost my balance."

"You sure?"

She nodded, smiling. She wondered if her dad would ever understand the sometimes terrible, deep yearning she had for some... thing, some feeling or some one, that she never had.

"Sleep well," she said softly, gently to him. He blew her a little kiss again, and she turned to go back inside.

Before she even hit the pillow, she was fast asleep in a deep, dark world.

 

**

Mikhalis had taken them down the stairs down one floor to the apartment next to Siana's.

He had let them in to a two-bedroom apartment which had a kitchenette next to a cosy living room. The whole apartment was long and skinny and every room faced the sea and street below, although their views were partially obscured by the buildings opposite. Mr Kim let Ken and Min Seok choose their rooms and confirmed some other details with Mikhalis, who then said good night and left them to their own devices.

Mikhalis had walked slowly down to his room, wondering about the new guests. Mr Kim had explained to him that they needed privacy and had travelled early as a routine precaution during their private travel sessions. This meant to him that they were under the regular public eye, and by their looks and ease with each other, he was certain they were an idol group.

He wondered if Siana would know who they were. He knew she could be discreet, so he wasn't worried that their privacy would be jeopardised, but it occurred to him that they might possibly see her as a teen fan and consider her a security risk. He would wait to see how things unfolded before doing anything. 

Mikhalis didn't believe in unnecessary actions. He liked to see how things played out. He also felt that the urge to protect people with warnings was sometimes really the urge to interfere, and he didn't see himself as someone who did that.

His reluctance to get involved in every day matters irked his ex-wife, he knew, who took it as apathy or uncaring moral laziness. He sighed. He really couldn't explain himself. 

Often times his non-action ended up causing problems too. But this was who he was and what he felt was right. And they both didn't want to try to change each other anymore, so their eventual split was pretty amicable, even though old pains still hurt sometimes.

He had showered, changed and ate and was about to watch the tv when Siana knocked. They went outside to sit while she ate.

While she ate, he watched her pretty eyes twinkling as she chatted, and silently wished she would always have someone to care for her. He looked up when they heard the balcony doors open above and rested his eyes a moment on the one they had called N. He seemed so self-assured and self-possessed, so in control and yet so pleasant and mindful of everyone else. When Mikhalis was that age, he remembered having none of that confidence, he was practically flailing through life until he met Jenny.

He heard Siana get up suddenly and was surprised she wasn't lingering over their first chat like she usually did. He kissed her goodnight and sat awhile as he listened to the slowly quieting sounds of the night.

He heard her come out onto her balcony and smiled. She loved her little corner, and he often heard her strumming her guitar at night before she went to bed. He heard the sudden scuffle with the chair and asked if she was okay. 

Then she was gone, probably fast asleep from a long day. He eventually stood, stretched and looked up to the clear sky and the stars above. 

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a dark shadow on the penthouse balcony, but he didn't let on that he saw that person as he finished stretching and went back inside, locking up.

Although he guessed that there was someone there all along, he couldn't be sertain the person was hiding himself, or if, like Siana, he just wanted to be alone on the balcony in the cold night air.

Another quiet soul in this noisy world, he thought, lying down and turning on the tv.

 

**

Leo saw the small light come on in the darkness, and stepped back when he saw Mr Mikhalis come out into the yard. He didn't want to go back inside yet, but he wanted to avoid any interaction so he could just be by himself on the balcony in peace. He noticed the young woman who followed him out, and watched as they sat together with ease and she wolfed down her meal.

He listened to them chatting, he supposed mostly in Greek, but every now and then he heard English words. They were too hushed for him to get the gist of their conversation. 

Suddenly the balcony shutter was thrown open and N peered out. Leo remained still and quiet, not wishing to let on that he had been standing there all along.

He saw her look up directly into his eyes. He saw she was an Asian mix, but most intriguing were her large almond-shaped eyes which carried a glint of defiance in them. She seemed angry that their privacy was intruded upon. He was startled that she was staring straight at him, but then realised that she couldn't actually see his face, as she shielded her eyes from the light. N waved and said a quiet hello to Mr Mikhalis, who waved back. Leo couldn't look away. He saw her eyes narrow a little before she bent her head to hide her face. 

She had obviously realised that there was someone else besides N, and that he had been watching them for longer than N's sudden appearance. Her damp hair fell over her face, straight and long. Leo realised she was the girl he had seen on the basketball court. Then she suddenly gathered up her food wrappings and went inside.  
He motioned to N to be quiet. Leo knew Mr Mikhalis hadn't seen him, and had only noticed N.

N lifted his chin in questioning, then held up a wrapped item - food with the same sort of wrapping she had been eating out of. Leo nodded as N motioned that he would leave it inside, and left.

Leo held his breath as he watched the girl come back out and lean over Mr Mikhalis for a hug and a kiss. He wondered if they were related, since Mr Mikhalis was definitely not Asian. He had a sudden, reluctant thought that they were not, and that perhaps they were friends, or even romantically involved. He peered down at her as she stood up straight and smiled before leaving.

When she was gone, he saw Mr Mikhalis rest for a moment, looking up at the sky. Leo looked up to see it and the tiny twinkling stars in the distance. Because the town had few bright lights, and because the air was cold and crisp and clean, the night sky was thick and dark and close, and it felt as if he was standing right under the sky such that he could reach out and touch it.

He felt a sudden rush of sensation, a dizzying breathlessness and could hear his heartbeat in his ears. He felt as if his next breath would carry him over the balcony rails and he would soar out over the groves and up into the mountains. The feeling both scared him and enthralled him, made him feel like there was magic in the air. He felt the urge to capture the feeling with words and music, and wondered if he could do it justice with a song. He suddenly wished he was back at his studio where he could put everything down as the mood came to him. Here, away from his tools, he only had apps and recording devices at his disposal.

He realised that someone was coming out onto the balcony below him, so he quietened his heart, slowing his breaths. He heard a soft sigh and wondered if it was the girl from before. 

She was staying directly below them? 

Then he heard a gasp, as she seemed to fall over, which caught the attention of Mr Mikhalis below, who then called up in concern.

They had a brief conversation while Leo kept out of full view. The tone of her voice was gentle, and he could hear a little tiredness in it, along with a strange breathlessness. He was intrigued, and wondered how often he would be seeing her again, since she lived directly below them. Then he realised that Ken would be staying next door to her along with Kkomae and MIn Seok, and for a moment he felt a twinge of old jealousy come up. 

Ken, who always had such ease with anyone, but especially with the opposite sex.

At first it hadn't mattered to Leo that there were more personable people in the group than he was. He was confident in his talent and skills, enough to be certain that he would make the final cut of their group. But after their debut came appearances, variety shows and interviews. He wouldn't just be performing or making music and just putting his talent out there. He found he had to put himself out there too, and it became painfully obvious to him and everyone around him, that he didn't really know how to do that. It didn't feel natural to lay himself out bare.

He would see the others, even the shyer, more inexperienced dongsaengs, come out of their shells onscreen and gain more confidence, and wonder what it was that was holding him back. He had felt a particular envy of Ken, who seemed to be comfortable in almost any situation. Of all of them, at first, Ken was most comfortable in his own skin, even when he was goofing off or embarrassing himself.

At the time, Leo never had a quick answer for anything unless it was to a straight forward, factual question. He had trouble noting sarcasm or dry humour sometimes, or he didn't show enough of a reaction to acknowledge a joke or comment. He was embarrassed to notice the members would try to compensate or make excuses or joke about him, and wanted desperately to break out of his awkwardness.

Things were a little different now. He could show parts of himself to the world without feeling that he was showing too much. He capitalised on his awkwardness and found it was the sort of thing that made him uniquely attractive to his fans. He felt most comfortable with N and Hyuk onscreen because they had a gentle ease with him and could coax the more dry humour he possessed out of him. Like his performances on stage, there was a part of him he was exhibiting which he felt was true to his character, but he was a little embarrassed to have the world know about him.

This was a part of what he envied about Ken. Like the others, Ken was comfortable with his stage and screen persona, and was practically the same person on and off the stage, both with their friends, family and colleagues, and with fans and strangers. But Leo saw himself as putting a part of himself out there that he couldn't reconcile with himself, and that included the sexual moves and expressions as well as the cheery smiles and cuteness.

Perhaps deep down, he feared that someone would recognise that there were stronger urges within him than he let on, and that he wasn't sure he had full control over himself.

Perhaps he was a control freak whose biggest fear was that he would lose the tight grip he had over himself.

He didn't really know, and it hurt his head to think too much about it, even though he seemed to like spending time thinking too much about things. This was where he knew N was his truest friend. Even though the other boys were somewhat aware of his preoccupations, N was the only one who had actively stepped in to help when he was floundering. 

To a certain extent, he recognised that Hyukkie, that monster child, was taking care of him as well, taking imaginary sides with him when he needed it most, then manhandling him for fun in return.

And now, for some reason, that old feeling that he couldn't compare to someone like Ken, had risen up out of forgotten memories.

Leo looked back up at the sky, trying to recall that heady feeling he felt just moments ago, trying to distract himself with thoughts of song-writing and expression. He felt hampered by the fact that he couldn't start work straight away, and the rising feelings ebbed away under a current of frustration with his circumstances.

They were stuck here for almost a month before they would return for a week of rehearsals before their concerts in the south east asian region.

Whatever would he do until their return?

**

Siana woke up in the same position she fell asleep in, at 5 in the morning. Because of the time difference, she became an early riser by default when she was in Greece, which made her feel productive and healthy, even though technically, she wasn't doing anything different throughout the day.

She turned over and stretched one way and then the other, like a cat, feeling ripples of tension rolling up and down her body until all her flesh relaxed on her bones.

She suspected that she wouldn't be needed before 8 in the morning, so she had a few hours to take a walk and see the town properly.

She dressed quickly, taking some money and her phone with her. She texted her dad, knowing he would be asleep still, saying she could pick up groceries if he let her know what he needed before her return.

Sneakers, joggers, hoodie and jacket. She grabbed the suitcase and wheeled it out of her studio. She noticed the outside light to the next door flat was on, which made her think that the guests had taken the extra rooms for more space. She rolled the case into the lift and took it down to the ground floor with her. Right next to her father's apartment was the small retail space with a tiny back room and bathroom, which faced directly onto the street. 

She went in and opened up a window. It was dusty, but she had time later to clean it all up. She took the case to the back room and opened it to stack all the items neatly on some shelves. Most of it was to be delivered to waiting customers, but some was for display and for her to sell to locals keen on crafting but who had no access to cheap supplies and weren't internet savvy. 

She wondered if she would be bringing haberdashery across the world every time she visited for Christmas. She was surprised that the customers were more willing to wait weeks for their delivery than to figure out how to order online. She guessed most of them would be older women who had few relatives patient enough to help them.

She sighed as she came across the two gowns. They were simple and elegant, which she liked - she would give her mum that. She just had no reason to have one. She would always prefer a casual night out with friends to some stately dinner where she had to stand up straight all the time.

She found some hangers and hung them on the coat hooks in the hallway. She would deal with the shop later, after she settled into a routine with the guests. She locked up and headed out the front door. Outside, the sun was beginning to rise, casting a dim light over the streets. People were already up and she could see chimney smoke rising from some of the older houses. It was a friday morning, and she knew the weekly fresh markets would have sprung up by now, with vendors selling anything from preserved fruits and raw honey to fresh vegetables and fruit, to trinkets and blankets and cheap plastic items.

She got her bike and pedalled out away from the town, along the stretch of beach which lead to an alternative highway that ran along the coast for a while before meandering upwards into the mountains. This was the less populated route which meant faster travel time to the flatlands beyond the mountains, but as her dad knew, she always preferred the Delphi road. But before she got to that coastal road, she took a left and turned inward towards the mountains.

She was taking a small paved road through the groves that workers used when they were collecting olives. These groves were situated on rocky and muddy terrain, and could not accommodate the machinated collection systems that other olive suppliers in the world could. This meant they still had to collect the olive fruit by manually.

Every time she came to Greece, the nets had already been laid out on the ground to catch the fruit as it fell. She never really got to see them working anymore, although when she was younger she would often tag along with relatives and their workers. The groves were dense with trees, and the sound of their voices would die quickly before it could travel far, so she often felt as if they were talking inside a dark cotton cloud, where every sound was muffled away before it could echo.

That feeling could give the groves a very eerie atmosphere, especially during the quieter times of the day like the early morning or dusk. She didn't think she could ever go into the groves during the night, even with company, unless they stayed in a car or something. Much as she enjoyed the solitude of being alone in the groves, she only really liked it in the morning, when she knew people would start cropping up throughout the land to do their work, and the birds would soon wake and the sun would start its journey to heat up the land.

Right now, she pedalled gently through the groves, not able to speed on the heavy bike, but working out her leg muscles and working up a sweat. She would go almost halfway to the foot of the mountains, where there was an old well by a small shed which the landowner used to to store his empty olive barrels and other tools. Then she would turn back and be home before the sun came up.

She wanted to check out the basement studio which was situated next to her father's apartment, but was a walk down several steps into what used to be an old wine cellar and space for storage. Her father had installed a springy wooden floor and mirrors and affixed barres to the walls on one side of the room. She had brought bluetooth speakers from home a couple of years back and played music from her phone. 

It was where she had been holding small classes for the little kids in the neighbourhood. Although she had some ballet experience and was used to teaching kids, she was well aware that she was really providing an alternative to babysitting, rather than fostering new talent or dancers with passion for performance.

She didn't mind that, as she was more interested in having that whole space for herself to work out and plan new choreography.

The last time she was here, she had noticed that the mothers who brought their kids around often stayed to watch. After a little chat with them, she offered to teach aerobics and belly dancing, and ended up making extra money with a few more classes than she had planned.

After she left every year, her father made the space available for rent for parties and meetings. She wondered if it remained the lively place it was when she was around.

She reached the well and circled back. She could now see the sun's rays beginning to stretch over the ground.

Before long she was back at the apartment block and had swung her leg off the bike pedal and stopped to park the bike on the kerb.  
She was breathing hard and she felt sweat trickling down the sides of her face and also down her back. She pulled her phone out to check for messages from her dad, but found none. She thought she had enough time to go visit her class room before she would check in on him at around 7am.

She practically skipped into the lobby and walked past the lift towards the staircase. To the right of the staircase, between it and the door to her father's apartment, was a tiny metal door to what looked like under-stairs storage. In fact it was an entrance down into the classroom space below. She used her key to open the lock and then unlatched the door, rather like a barn door, and it swung open with a raspy creak. She turned on the light to the stairwell and went down to the metal grill door at the bottom. She unlocked that and was in the room. She turned off the light at a switch inside the room.

Although underground, there were some windows above ground level that let in some natural light. Under these were a long a row of barres that stretched along the whole wall. 

At the opposite corner to where she had come in, a proper security door that led directly to the yard outside her father's apartment stood locked. She turned on a couple of lights and crossed to open that door. Outside she heard the sounds of the rousing township. Voices calling out, radios being turned on, a couple of dogs yelping in the streets.

She opened it and looked out into the yard, turning to check for signs of activity at her father's place. He didn't seem to be awake yet. She smiled and pulled out her phone. She ran through her music list and brought up a playlist she used for warming up, which included some songs for which she had already created some choreography.

The electric piano sounds to Heize's "No Way" starting playing gently through the speakers, and she immediately started moving, at first a slow step, shoulders and arms swaying as she approached the centre of the room and faced the mirrors. With the beat, she sank into an easy, lower stance, starting to gently work her legs, while her arms began a stretch routine that began to involve the rest of her upper body. Before she knew it, she was doing gentle body rolls from side to side, feeling the rhythm and groove of the song, adopting an attitude which she felt suited the lyrics, even though, like the song, her movements were easy and smooth. The song ended and she walked around, stretching her arms more and rolling her neck. Her body, warm from the cycling, was responding well to the movement and she felt like she could start running and jumping and spinning.

Because she was up so early she didn't feel her body was up to doing that, even though she felt like her heart and soul were ready for it. The next song up was Lee Hi's "Breathe", which she knew was very slow and sombre. She considered changing the music but decided she would just go with it, and lay on the floor to do some leg stretches.

On her back, she engaged her core muscles and lifted her legs one by one up and then towards her, bending them, pulling them towards her body, then stretching them out to the side. Naturally her body followed, and she turned to twist and stretch her spine. Then she was straight on her back again and letting her legs move as if they were independent, while she kept her back cemented to the ground using her tummy muscles. Eventually the urge to express overtook the physical stretching and she arched off the floor into a sitting position, then pulled her legs straight up into the air before her, forming a "v" with her legs and body, a pilates move to centre her balance and engage her core muscles.

She rolled back, letting the backward roll propel her into standing position. The vocals began soaring at that point, and like the title, Siana was feeling like she wanted to express that need to let go, that need to take a deep breath or to let go of one, to let out those feelings of constriction someone could feel, whether in love or exercising. She smiled, happy to be where she was.

She practised some gentle pirouetting, spotting and spins, testing if she still had the leg strength to carry her whole limb out to the side as she spun. Although the muscles had not been worked recently like that, she was happy to find she still had residual strength and thought to herself she should take up ballet again. Although she had stamina and strength, teaching kiddie ballet and dancing street dance just required a different kind of power.

She could see she didn't have the lightness and grace of a ballet dancer, as if her centre of gravity was too low, and her stance too close to the ground. She practised travelling jumps and worked on her attitudes as she cut through the air.

She stopped during the silence between the songs to check her arm lines, trying to lean deep into her back without losing her upright stance, to open out her decolettage and give her arms the feeling of being very light, long and poised.

As if it was a reminder tapping her on her shoulder, Crush's "Hug Me" came on, and her body began to respond, demanding she abandon her poise and daintiness, and to get down and dirty.

His voice came on and she fell into a routine she had choreographed with one of her dance partners back home. They had soon realised the song was not about hugging at all, and after choreographing accordingly, had had to abandon the routine they had come up with because it had become too risky for the show they had planned to perform at.  
She remembered the routine very well though, because it was one of the few where she had to dance intimately with a partner. At first, they had both been a little awkward, but they soon figured they had to commit to it one hundred percent, otherwise they would just look embarrassed and awkward. He had been very respectful, but there were times when her own physical boundaries had to be crossed for the sake of making it work.

Like when he stood behind her and held her close while they did a long, slow bodyroll. She still felt bothered by the thought of it, but she remembered also that when they did it right, it looked fierce and amazing and she felt like she was getting somewhere in terms of performance. It felt like she was expressing something natural, and human. That made her happy, and she had come to value her partner's gentle reassurance that he wouldn't do anything she didn't like. Although she didn't have much physical experience with boys, she began to imagine that this was what it was like, being so close to someone they could hear your breath or feel your heartbeat. She often found herself wondering how it would be like to be close to her dance partner, to hug him whenever she wanted, or to kiss him. She fantasised they were together, and daydreamed about what could happen beyond the dancefloor.

Then she was brought to reality very quickly.

She remembered them finishing up rehearsal one day and finding that his girlfriend was waiting for him outside. Siana didn't know how much feeling was showing in her face, but the mixture of disappointment and jealousy was so strong that she felt like she was eyeing the girl with hatred. The girl looked at her, smiled politely as they were introduced, then lifted her face as he kissed her on the lips.

Siana suddenly saw that she was just another dance partner, and that they could never have been anything else, no matter what she believed of her own fantasies.

As they left, she realised one thing: that professionalism was the only way to work in the industry, especially when it involved the dignity and private lives of the the others involved. She put herself in the girlfriend's shoes and thought about how she would feel if her boyfriend was dancing intimately with some other girl.

Siana resolved to never be the cause of another girl's pain when it came to boys.

She also suddenly understood a very important thing: that pining or lusting after someone did not give her any rights over them. Often when she heard news of the sasaeng fans that would say and do things that crossed moral boundaries and caused safety problems to the very idols they professed to love, she knew she could never understand that frame of mind. No matter how much she fangirled over an idol, she didn't even for minute, think that the idol would ever, in real life, suddenly fall in love with her, if she were to find his number, or stalk his family, or write hate about his friends.

She smiled as the song reached its chorus, where Crush sang in his desperate, plaintive voice, "Hug, Hug, Hug Me", which was where she would have been wrapped in her partner's arms as he stood behind her and guided her hips with one hand and his own pelvis, as they body-rolled and gyrated. Now alone, she let one arm hang down while the other was thrown up and behind her head as if she were holding her imaginary partner's neck who would have been standing behind her. Her legs were bent in an open position, her body down low. She watched herself through heavy-lidded eyes as she moved her hips from side to side, then, with her head and legs stationary, while she did a body wave, she focused on getting her torso isolations just right.

She did it to the left then to the right, then came out of her stance to flip her hair and turn out of his grasp. Because he wasn't there to grab her hand and spin her back to him, she took the choreography elsewhere and began practising her hip isolations, suddenly going into belly dance hip drops and pops, all the while watching herself in the mirror.

She laughed as she saw herself dancing ethnic middle eastern steps to the sound of Crush's R&B. But she kept on practising, focusing on keeping her upper torso and arms upright, still and light, whilst her hips and legs did all the work.

The music ended, and there was silence. Her movements didn't slow as she pulled the hair-tie out of her hair, which was in a messy, loose bun, and shook it out with her hands, at first holding it up off her neck as she stepped forward and popped her hips. Then she started to sway very slowly, trying to create an illusion that her body was twisting like a snake. She flicked her hair out behind her and spread her arms, bending back slowly as she moved her shoulders and arms, emphasising the strength she had in her belly and upper torso. She turned slightly so that the narrowest part of her waist would be shown off as she kept bending backwards, her eyes never leaving the mirror so that she could check her lines and make sure it was all looking effortless.

Finally, she had bent back as far as she could handle, before she released her neck and allowed her head to fall back completely, letting her hair touch the ground. She kept her eyes open for balance and to spot herself so that she wouldn't lose her sense of direction. 

When she finally looked back, she saw someone standing in the stairwell leading in from the upstairs lobby.

 

**

Leo awoke like the rising dead: he sat straight up in bed, his legs straight out and his head bowed as he slowly deep-breathed into consciousness, his hands resting on his thighs to steady himself.

He had slept fitfully, dreaming of himself auditioning in a tiny room where everyone stood too close around him and watched in stony silence. After he finished singing, the judges looked at each other without a word. Someone he couldn't see said out loud, that he should sing better for an idol. Someone else asked him to make them laugh. Yet another told him to dance with his shirt off.

Leo opened his eyes and shook off the anxiety that had plagued him throughout the night. He hadn't had a dream like that in years.

He heard the lift whirring into action and then a long struggle as someone was loading what seemed to be a wagon full of goods into it, before he heard the heavy door close, and the compartment descend to the ground floor.

Despite the cold outside, he was warm from the heat given off by the wall-mounted radiators in the room. He got up and went to the bathroom, opening up the biggest towel he could find, which wasn't that big, to heat it up on the radiator in the bathroom. After washing up, he decided the shower could wait, and wrapped the now hot towel around his shoulders. It barely covered his shoulders and kept sliding off, so he wrapped it around his neck like a muffler, feeling the dry heat seep into his shoulders, sending a molten relaxation down through his muscles.

He tried to unlock the bedroom door quietly but it made quite a noise. He had locked the door the night before to prevent any of the members walking in casually while he lounged on his bed before he slept. Although he didn't mind it, he wanted peace and quiet after the long hours of travelling. Most of all, he didn't want them coming in and out to share the bathroom, even though it meant the four of them left outside were then forced to share the one remaining bathroom.

He needn't have worried, because after their quick and delicious meal, nobody even knocked. He heard the tv going for some time, until late in the morning when someone turned it off.

He walked outside to find that Hyuk and Hongbin had taken the room directly opposite his, which was larger and had two double doors leading to the front balcony. They had left their door slightly ajar, and seemed to have fallen asleep in mid-conversation, as they were lying on top of their duvets and bed-coverings, with the bedside lamp on.  
Leo found a spare blanket on an armchair and covered Hongbin with it, but there wasn't another one for Hyuk. He rolled Hyuk's massive body to one side of the bed, tucked the sheets into the centre of the bed under Hyuk's body, then aggressively pulled him back to the exposed side of the bed, so that now the sheets could be pulled over the maknae's form.

He bent down to cover Hyuk and tuck in the sheets around his body, taking extra care to "finish the pie" properly by making sure the covers didn't let any air in or out. He tucked the covers under Hyuk's feet, legs, butt, arms and torso as if he were covering a pie with a large piece of pastry, then took special care to poke it around Hyuk's neck nice and tight.

He got the fright of his life when Hyukkie whispered seductively, "Thank you Oppa," in his ear as he leaned close.

He almost punched Hyuk as he jumped back.

"Aaaagh!" he said, weirdly restrained as he tried to keep quiet for the sake of the others. Almost without thinking, he smacked Hyuk across the chest. Hyuk was grinning widely.

"I love it when you treat me to your love-smacks, Oppa. Do it again."

Leo grabbed the pillow Hyuk was lying on and covered his face with it. It wobbled and fell to one side, so Leo adjusted it, pressing lightly down and then sighing when it fluffed back up again. He saw Hyuk's smile peeking out from under it.

"How do I kill this thing?" he muttered under his breath.

Hyuk calmly removed the pillow and looked at Leo with crinkling smiling eyes as he said, "Oppa so kinky. I like."

Leo snorted and walked out, checking in on the other room. In it, he saw N lying in a stately, neat position, his arms resting on top of the covers, crossed over his stomach. Without warning N flipped the covers and sat up, swinging his legs to the side so he could put on his house slippers. He looked so neat he could have walked straight into a meeting in his pyjamas.

"Taekwoonie, you're up already? We found coffee in the kitchen, you know."

Leo shut the door wordlessly just as N reached it, then turned toward the living room, heading for the kitchen. He found Ravi lying face-down on one of the sofas, his covers having fallen off during the night.

Leo bent to pick them up and flung them over Ravi, who had his arms hugged tight under him and his hands curled up under his chin with the cold. Because the living room was so large and airy, the heaters were too far away to keep him warm. His phone was still clutched in his hand, so Leo pried it out of his grasp and laid it on the table. He heard N come out of his room and shuffle after him, turning on a small light in the kitchen.

He saw N procure the small jar of instant coffee, and he smiled. Much as he preferred espresso coffees, if all he could have was instant, then instant would do, too. He watched N make a single cup of coffee for him, then went over to get it when N held it out to him. They both stood at the sink, looking out at the dim mountain view.

"We've never been somewhere like this. The mountains are at our backs and the sea at the front. The sky is like magic. It's very inspiring." Leo nodded as he blew on the coffee.

"I wish our studio was here with us too. Then we could work on that inspiration."

N turned to face Leo squarely, a smug look on his face.

"This is why all of you need me. Because of my big shameless mouth, I managed to find out that the owner is a composer and has a studio in the building. You're welcome."  
Leo laughed.

"And Kkomae said that he met the owner's daughter, who is half Korean or something. The girl who brought us the food last night." Leo burnt his lips on the coffee as he sipped too much too quickly.

"He said she doesn't speak Hangguk very fluently, but she speaks it. We are dying to know how her father came to marry his wife. Where is she? And why does he have a studio? And whether we can use it while we are here. Because the place is so inspirational. But you are clueless as usual because you're always busy being chic in the corner, while you leave me to look after everybody alone."

"Are Mum and Dad fighting again?" Hyuk appeared in the kitchen, walking up to stand behind Leo.

N glared at Leo and pushed his shoulder, who smiled apologetically at him, trying to stabilise the hot coffee swirling in his cup. But N was not finished.

"My mother told me there is always a way if you look for it. You just have to open your eyes and look. And be interested."

"Very logical and common-sensical," said Hyuk, leaning against Leo hanging an arm over his shoulder. He and N looked like the friendly playground bullies who had cornered the quiet kid.

"How does he get the best room all to himself? Because I let him. Because Leader N let him," N poked Leo in the shoulder for emphasis, his most indignant face on. Leo stepped back, giggling, but was blocked by Hyuk, who held him fast.

"This dysfunctional relationship of who dominates who is teaching me a lot about parenting," Hyuk said observationally.

Ravi raised a sleepy head, mumbling, "You're talking about domination without me?" before turning over and opening one eye to watch them.

Hongbin appeared, his hair fluffed up from sleep and the blanket around his shoulders.

"Guys, can we ever just have a normal conversation like other people? It's too early in the morning for that kind of talk."

Hyuk spoke to Ravi over his shoulder.

"Apparently there's a studio here in the building, hyung."

Ravi's other eye popped open. Then he shut them both again and turned over in a sulk.

"Don't tease me, it's cruel."

"No, it's true. N-hyung, let's go and see Mr Mikhalis about it this morning."

"Kkomae said he would speak to him."

"Then let's go exploring," Hyuk said.

Hongbin brightened suddenly.

"Oh, yes, let's go out in the cold and be back home before the sun comes up like nature intended!" Then he dropped his bright smile and turned to leave. "It's not even six in the morning, what is wrong with you?" he said as he shuffled back to his room.

Leo looked at N, who stared at him with pursed lips. He bowed his head, looking at his coffee.

"Thank you for the coffee, hyung. And for the good advice. I will try my best."

N smiled and turned Leo around sharply, putting an arm around his neck and putting him into a headlock. He pinched Leo's cheek as they walked out of the kitchen, past Hyuk.

"This one pleases me," N purred.

**

Leo let N move his toiletries into his bathroom.

While N felt he had won a little victory, Leo was thinking that now he had the perfect bathroom mate who would clean up and keep things organised. By the same token, nobody else would want to share because they usually avoided sharing with N. Leo thought briefly about how the world behaved, and felt with certainty that there was a natural order to things, and that his total acceptance of N was one of many small ways in which the members co-existed peacefully.

He smiled. They always teased each other and rarely had bad fights or prolonged resentment. But the teasing came from truths. And truth be told, Leo realised, he was lazy about personal relationships. Or more honestly, he didn't really know how to initiate things. He realised that much of the time, others felt they were doing the work when it came to his relationships with them.

N often admonished him about it, telling him he should act from the heart, and to trust himself. Leo didn't really know what N meant by that. He didn't understand what it meant to trust oneself. It's not like he would hurt himself on purpose. The concept confused him. N would try to explain, but the words seemed to fall over him in a jumble and he would end up just nodding and saying he would do better.

He opened up the balcony door and walked out into the brisk morning air, listening to the town come to life as the sun began to rise.

But Leo understood when N spoke about him acting from the heart. N would point out that he always took care of their dongsaengs in a way N didn't, which he reckoned was caring. Leo understood what N meant by that. Because he just did those things without thinking, just because they had to be done, and he could.

But noticing when someone needed space, or when someone needed to talk... Leo didn't know how to do that. He realised he spent too much time in his head, and if it wasn't about music and work, then it was about how he could avoid undue attention when he wasn't performing.

He gulped down the suddenly cold coffee and sighed. Unless everything was planned out, or had distinct limitations, or had set rules, he began to flounder. And dealing with people often meant not knowing what the boundaries were, or not knowing what to expect. Or feeling like there were unknown expectations of him, which could stress him out sometimes.

He was nearing thirty, and he felt he still hadn't figured life out. While he was walking on a road of success that he couldn't have fathomed when he started, others admired him. He felt conflicted. He had a great awareness that his role in the business that was Vixx was as just another player, who, although seemed irreplaceable, did not get that place on his own. He was another cog in the machine, albeit a famous, well-dressed, well-blowdried and well-rehearsed one. All the real action was going on in corporate boardrooms upstairs while he looked into mirrors and audiences with seductive expressions.

Leo looked up to see N who had stuck his head out, smiling.

His smile disappeared.

"Are you thinking again? Stop it. I mean it! We are going downstairs to wake up Ken and Kkomae. Coming?"

"I will catch up."

N pointed at him, clicked his tongue and winked. Leo smirked. Then N was gone.

Leo took the cup back to the kitchen and noticed everyone was gone except one person who was showering. He grabbed his coat and walked out, still in his sleeping clothes. He shoved his feet into the boots he had worn to travel and closed the door behind him.

He slipped on the coat as he took the stairs, sauntering down slowly, listening as he passed each floor to the sounds within the different homes. One floor down, he heard the boys chatting loudly in the flat below theirs. He noted that the only other door on that floor must belong to the girl's home, whose balcony was directly below his.  
He remembered seeing her from afar, wrapped in another boy's arms on the basketball courts. 

The picture in his mind was of how small her waist was under the boy's arm as he held her tight. When she stepped out of his embrace, her hair fell out of her hoodie and spilled out onto her shoulder and chest. Later, when she had looked up at him from below, he saw her pretty brown eyes as they looked straight at him for a moment.

Leo walked down to the next floor, hearing kettles boiling and doors opening and closing. As he neared the ground floor, he slowed, hearing someone in the lobby. His reluctance to be discovered wasn't just about being recognised, it was also habit. As an introvert, he was naturally sneaky. He felt that any undue amount of stimulation, like unnecessary human interaction, should be avoided and thus, he had to think pre-emptively. Which made him sneaky.

He slowed down enough to peek around the corner in the final bend of the staircase, and saw that the owner's daughter was opening a small door under the stairs. He waited til she went in, then slowly came down to peer around the door jamb.

As his eyes adjusted to the dimness, he heard her unlocking a padlock and opening a door. He waited, listening, at the top of the stairs. He couldn't see what was around the bend in the staircase. Curiosity made him want to follow, but his better sense thought she could be going to a store room or bathroom and be coming straight out again.

He stood by the door, hesitating. He realised anyone could walk into the lobby and see him loitering. He sat on the steps, trying to appear like he was waiting there for a reason.  
He heard music begin to play, and it sounded familiar. As soon as Heize's vocals came on, he realised it was Korean and he leaned forward to pick out the lyrics. But the music travelling up to his ears was both muted and blown out by the stairwell that it travelled through. He sat rooted to the spot, wondering what was happening.

Suddenly he heard a voice calling from upstairs. It was Hongbin, checking to see if anyone had taken the key to the penthouse. Leo listened as Hongbin listened for a response. When he got none, he shuffled down the stairs and knocked on the door of the flat the others were in. Leo heard Kkomae open the door and say he had left it in the bowl on the hallway table for them.

Then they heard the door upstairs shut, and a distressed yelp from Hongbin as he realised he had locked himself out.

Leo smirked. He heard the music change to Lee Hi's "Breathe". This was getting interesting. What was that girl doing in the storeroom?

He heard a series of manly sighs and childish whines as they realised they were locked out of the penthouse. After a bit of discussion, he heard them decide to come down to get a spare from Mr Mikhalis. He jumped up silently when he heard them call for the lift and it creaked into action. He gingerly stepped through the small doorway and pulled the door shut without locking it.

Suddenly he was in the dark. He stepped down further into the stairwell, rounding the bend and peeking around the corner. He was surprised to see that instead of the storeroom he was expecting, it was a bright, airy basement with a row of ballet-style bars going across the wall on the left to the far wall, where he could see there was another door that stood half open, which had stairs that lead up to what must be the yard outside. He craned his neck around from his hidden spot to look for the girl.

He saw that she was standing in front of the mirrored wall to the right, checking her stance and adjusting her arms, which she held up in a ballet pose. He could see her from the back clearly, but he wanted to see her reflection in the mirror, which he knew would require him stepping into the light so he could see the far right wall. He could see she was making miniscule adjustments in her arms, lifting her upper arm more and softening her fingertips, leaning her head more to one side, turning her face forward but angling her chin up.

Because she was moving so slowly, and making such small adjustments, he could tell she was an experienced dancer who was very concerned with getting it right. She was checking her form, trying to remember how it felt rather than how it looked, so that when she was performing without a mirror, she would do the moves just right. She reminded him of N, who would often step out of position to watch their practise, pinpointing exactly where someone's arm went too high, or whose angles were not quite right.

The music changed, and he recognised the first ambient notes of "Hug Me" come on. He watched the graceful creature, concerned with poise and form, suddenly shake out her arms and drop low into a squat, her arms up as if someone were holding on to them, then suddenly come up to standing, popping her butt and straightening her legs and back. 

She ended the move by flipping her head back, her hair sweeping up and behind her, as she went back, almost into the same staring position, a slightly wider leg stance, her arms up.

His eyes widened, and he risked stepping out into view to look at her reflection in the mirror. She let one of her arms fall to her side and dangle down the front of her thigh, as the other bent at an angle and grasped her hair behind her head.

He finally got a good look at her face as she watched herself in the mirror. Her eyes were half-closed, and she stared at her own face as her hips began to rock from side to side, her dangling arm lifting to stroke a line down her thigh. When her hand reached her knee, she did a body roll and popped her chest, flipping to the other side, repeating the same move again.

He saw her mouth open slightly with the exertion, and felt his own breath catch. He didn't know why he was breathless, he had seen countless performances and dancers in rehearsal, dressed in less and doing more explicit moves. He had partnered with some of the best dancers on stage, and had certainly done some hard moves in their own stage choreography.

However this was different. This wasn't a stage. This was someone's private time, and she didn't know he was watching. It stirred something inside of him, that was both exciting and disturbing.

She seemed to do a spin, and awkwardly stopped with her arm out. He realised she must have danced this with a partner, and that he was supposed to catch her hand and assist her, but now the choreography was off without that balancing factor. He suddenly felt that he didn't like that she had danced this with someone before. How close had he stood to her when she was gyrating her hips and flipping her hair?

Then she did something which surprised him. She laughed and started doing a bellydance shimmy, her arms held away from her body , her hands by her hips with her palms facing them, as if she were saying, "here, look at these hips!"

He watched as she expertly rolled her hips as if she were drawing an infinity sign in the air with her pelvis.

She did a quick spin and ended with her legs apart, facing the far wall. She started doing some chest isolations, rolling her ribcage as she started bending backwards. She turned her head to watch her form in the mirror. 

She was moving slowly, displaying a great amount of core and leg strength as she bent back slowly. From his vantage point, he could see her head coming back, and at the final moment when she released her neck and allowed her head to drop right back, her hair spilled behind her and touched the floor. He saw the top of her chest and the rise of her breasts, all covered by the layer of sweatsuit she was wearing.

But most enticingly, he saw her look straight at him in an upside down glance that made his heart skip a beat. 

He immediately stepped back into the shadows and let out a long-held breath.

He squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head. He was sneaky, but he wasn't good at it. He always got caught. He grimaced with embarrassment that he had been caught spying and backtracked like the chicken that he was.

He went quietly back up the darkened stairs, listening to hear if she was coming over to check who was there. He was afraid she would, then he would have to face her and acknowledge that he had been spying.

He heard male voices as the lift door opened, and paused to listen behind the little door he had pulled shut earlier. He heard the voices die down and quickly opened the door and stepped into the lobby.

He noticed immediately that the door to Mr Mikhalis' place was open, and saw Ken and Hongbin coming out, arguing with each other.

They had obviously come down late after the others, found the front door open but the house empty, and didn't feel they could walk through his home without him.

It was too late for Leo to close the door behind him, so he pretended to find it just as they looked up and saw him.

"I wonder where this leads to?" he said aloud. Ken yelled a loud good morning as Hongbin screwed up his face and leaned away.

"Too loud!"

Ken looked into the doorway, "You think we can get out to the yard from here?"

"Yeah, sure, where else would it go?" Leo said, letting them both go ahead of him. They went straight down and turned the corner into the room. He heard Ken ask N about making friends, realising it was about the girl.

**

Siana thought nothing of seeing someone in the doorway, since people often walked in on her practise sessions or even into classes from that way. She finished by bringing herself up slowly and ending.

She turned to acknowledge the person, but no one was there.

She skipped over to her phone and checked the time. It was already seven. She scrolled through her music and pressed shuffle on a playlist before trotting to the door to look outside and check in on her father. She went up to the mirror to tie up her hair, moving out of sight of the yard door, which she had left ajar to let the morning air in. Then she turned to swing it open, and walked straight into two men who had been sneaking a look, and unaware that she had approached so quickly.

She went face-first into someone's chest, and heard him gasp as his arms came round to grab her shoulders. To his left, the other man jumped back with an amused look on his face. She yelped, stepping back in surprise.

And looked straight up into the eyes of Cha Hakyeon.


	3. Everyone Gets Acquainted

Siana blinked, hardly believing that the person holding her was, in fact, Cha Hakyeon. And next to him, looking amused, was Hyuk, who seemed to be peering over N's shoulder at her with glee.

She stepped back, pulling out of his grasp. Amused, N let his hands drop as he gave a small polite bow. He spoke in Korean, asking her if she was okay. She nodded, seeing that behind him was her father, coming down the small set of stairs with the Mr Kkomae. Above ground, she heard other male voices, but she felt that if she were to see who they were, she would faint.

She focused on Mr Kim. So that's why he seemed familiar. She had seen his face so many times. He must have been in every single airport photo she had seen of Vixx, always leading the way or bringing up the rear with documents in hand.

Siana met eyes with her father, who looked at her with concern. She realised her mouth was hanging open. She shut it immediately, biting her lip.

Of course. Yeah, it was perfectly reasonable.

Mr Kim was here in little, unknown, seaside Itea with Cha Hakyeon and Han Sanghyuk who happened to be standing right outside the door of the room where moments ago she was erotically dancing with an imaginary partner whilst Crush sang "Hug Me" in a voice full of desire and longing.

Her hand flew up to cover her mouth involuntarily. N's eyes glinted and he pressed his lips together as if to stop himself from smiling. Hyuk whispered in N's ear.

"I thought Kkomae said she didn't speak the language?" They both looked at her curiously, Hyuk's eyes twinkling and N's mouth curving into a tiny smirk. He lifted his eyebrows in questioning.

As if she wasn't standing in front of two out of the six only people she had ever dreamed of meeting in her lifetime, she answered in English, "I can understand, but I don't speak very well."

Hyuk nodded as her father stepped around them and looked at her in questioning.

She stepped back, stammering, "Uh, what's going on?"

Her father fixed her with a concerned stare.

"These are our guests who arrived last night. You know that. Something going on here? You okay?" he stepped closer to ask her quietly.

Siana nodded, then said, "I just... I recognise them." Mikhalis raised his eyebrows at that and nodded.

"Well, don't forget you are still here to work. And remember they are concerned about their privacy, so..."

Siana nodded, giving herself a little mental shake. She had to remember that she was here to do a job. She smiled at N and Hyuk, then moved back to let them and Mr Kkomae come in. He looked around the room in surprise, then turned to Mikhalis.

"You have a dance studio too?"

Mikhalis gestured toward Siana. "My daughter teaches dance classes here during the holidays." N straightened up and looked excited. "Dance?" he said in his accented English to her. She nodded, still in a daze. Behind him and Hyuk she saw two more people descending the stairs, and realised that they were Ravi and the luggage handler, whom she now guessed must be another manager or assistant, that she had passed in the lobby the day before.

She watched, stunned, as Ravi walked through without seeing her, pushing past N and Hyuk, to join Mr Kim and her dad in the room. He exclaimed with delight, looking around at the mirrors and noticing the tiny speakers she had mounted on the ceiling.

She wanted to turn to a friend, to anyone, and squeal with delight, but she had no one there with her, no one standing there except godamn Cha Hakyeon and Han Sanghyuk.

She wanted to tell someone that Ravi was looking at the speakers she had installed. So silly, but so important and she needed to share that information. She suddenly wished she had shared her love for Vixx with someone, anyone from back home, so that she could call them and scream down the phone about how they were in her dance space, in her building, and she would be in charge of their stay while they were there.

She stopped for a moment. Were all the members here? She looked past N and Hyuk to see if anyone else was outside, then caught N looking at her.

"Yes, we're all here," he said with a smirk. She felt herself going red with embarrassment.

She heard Mikhalis answering Ravi's questions through Mr Kim, then they all heard a commotion coming from the other door - the one that lead through to the lobby.

She recognised Ken and Hongbin's voices as they echoed through the stairwell, then they burst through the door and into the room. Ken looked thrilled and he whacked Hongbin on the shoulder.

"See? I told you we could come this way!"

"No, Leo said we could come this way," said Hongbin in his calm voice. They both acknowledged Mikhalis and looked around the room, their eyes finally stopping when they saw Siana across the room. They looked from Siana to N and Hyuk, then at each other.

Ken smiled so hard his eyes curved into little half-moons that made her almost want to gasp with how attractive that was.

He gave N a naughty look from across the room. "Hyuuuuung? Have you been making friends without us?"

N put a hand on Siana's shoulder, making her turn to face him. He looked into her eyes seriously for a moment, then waggled a finger in front of her eyes.

"No Ken. NO. Ken bad." Hyuk nodded aggressively at her from behind N. She heard Ken shout across the room for them to stop.

She smiled, then looked at Ken, only to see that behind them, very quietly, Leo had stepped into the room as well.

Her heart skipped a beat. His eyes met hers for the tiniest moment, before he looked down and away, as if he barely noticed she was there. He walked, hands in pockets and head down, towards Ravi, who began excitedly talking to him about the room.

She felt a weird mixture of intense relief and intense disappointment, but her smile never wavered.

She focused on Ken, who was coming forward. He walked right up to her, so close that she felt a wave of air following him, and she noted that he smelled of handsoap and toothpaste. She liked it, and kept eye contact with him till he stopped next to them all.

He was so tall, she had to look up a couple of inches. His smile was so open, relaxed and inviting, she smiled back warmly. It felt as if an old friend was returning home. She almost wanted to open her arms and hug him.

Hyuk stepped in front of him and pushed him back a little, but Ken played at trying to chest-bump his way through back to her. She giggled.

"Who is this? Is she the food-bringer? My name is Ken," he finally said in English.

She nodded her head politely and said, "Siana."

N, Ken and Hyuk all murmured in approval, circling around her in interest, as if her name was the most wonderful thing they had ever heard of.

She was used to being around big hulking men even when they were crowding her, because of her cousins, but here, she felt so intensely aware of who they were, of how they moved and their whole stage persona which she had long regarded as incredibly sexy and attractive, that she felt they were standing way too close for her to remain calm. She also felt suspicious of their pack behaviour, as if they were moving in for the kill.

From watching her cousins, she realised that sometimes boys did things in groups, both out of camaraderie, and also out of a sense of belonging, of looking out for each other.

Whilst she was enjoying the sudden attention, in the back of her mind she knew they were testing the waters to see where they stood. And whilst Ken seemed to be the one leading the way with the flirting, it was N and Hyuk who were observing and learning from his approach.

This behaviour was both exciting and frightening for her, because she knew the outcome was unpredictable. She had seen her cousins unknowingly scare girls with raucous behaviour, where she had had to step in and calm the boys down from being too aggressive. She knew that it all depended on how the girls stood their ground, and that if they were smart, they could control the situation carefully.

They were standing so close, she was worried she might reach out and touch them without knowing what she was doing, and a sudden panic ran through her.   
She looked up into the eyes of Ken, who was watching her with a glint in his eye.

She felt he knew exactly what kind of effect he was having on her, using his bodily proximity and his natural confidence to make her feel excited.

N noticed Ken staring at her, realised it was a little too intense, and tapped him on the shoulder. Ken immediately laughed softly, making a cute little sound in the back of his throat, and stepping back, dissipating any obvious tension there was in the air.

Siana let her gaze follow the angle of his face as he laughed, and she couldn't help thinking that he had the prettiest eyes when he smiled like that. His exposed neck seemed dangerously close, and she felt a sudden urge to reach up and... Funny, she had never really thought much of his looks until now. She realised how little actual good looks had to do with attraction.

And Ken, whom she had never really thought of as hot, seemed incredibly attractive right now.

She stepped back too, smiling a tight-lipped smile, and looked to her dad, who was watching out of the corner of his eye as he spoke to Mr Kim. She hoped her lewd thoughts weren't showing too much on her face.

She noticed that Leo was standing next to her dad, looking at Ravi, who was talking, and Mr Kim, who had their backs to her. She almost thought Leo was actually looking past Ravi at her, and her eyes widened momentarily as she thought she looked him in the eye. But then, he nonchalantly looked down at the ground when Ravi turned to ask about having access to the space.

Mikhalis looked up at Siana, saying, "That depends on Siana."

They all turned to look at her.

All except Leo, who seemed to have found something very interesting on the ground, and was perusing it closely with his foot. She finally looked Ravi in the eyes, and it seemed as if he had noticed her for the first time. He seemed a little taken aback to notice that she had mixed looks. Perhaps he recognised that she was part Korean, or at least, Asian.

After a moment, she realised they were all waiting for an answer.

"Uhmmm... I haven't set any times yet." She said in English. Then she looked at her father and spoke to him in Greek.

"Baba, if you want I can set aside a fixed time for them, but I must have the weekends and early evenings free for now until I can set the times with the parents."  
He replied in Greek also, "They don't want fixed times, they want access whenever they feel like it."

She looked at Ravi, who was watching her with interest. How could they possibly expect to have access whenever they wanted? She spoke again, a little louder this time.

"No, there are some kids expecting to have classes. They are repeat students who have been looking forward to it all year. Just tell them any weekday afternoon or early morning, like today. I need the weekend."

Mikhalis sighed, saying, "They all go to church on Sundays, I'm sure they won't want dance lessons on that day."

"Yes they go to church and some of them need a place for the kids to be looked after and kept busy while they are there."

She noticed that everyone was listening and watching with interest. She realised that perhaps they had expected her to be a gracious daughter who didn't question her father's authority, because she was Asian. However, that was not how their relationship worked. Even her mother didn't expect that behaviour of her. They had treated her as an equal almost as soon as she began having concrete opinions about the world around her.

But they had also taught her that having the right to voice an opinion came with a certain responsibility toward the people she wanted to hear her out.

She learnt very quickly that "having an opinion" didn't make her any more adult or mature than others, if she didn't know how to BE an adult and mature. However, knowing that the boys were from a rather conservative culture, she realised that she may have been coming off as rude, either towards her father, or towards them. She really couldn't tell if they were offended or intrigued by her interaction with her dad.

She turned to Mr Kim, who seemed pretty fluent in english, and explained carefully and politely that she had children who were expecting to re-enroll in her holiday classes and had been waiting all year.

Hyuk cocked his head, obviously understanding very well and getting interested in her explanation.

She explained further that, because she had just arrived, she had not yet had a chance to set class times with the parents.

Both Kkomae and Hyuk went, "Aaah!" with understanding and began explaining to those around them. She looked at her dad, who smiled a little, nodding.

Then she realised that Leo, who was standing near MIkhalis, was watching her with a frown on his face. She blinked, unsure if she had done something wrong. He cast his eyes down, turning to Hongbin, who had been a quiet observer all this time.

Kkomae and Ravi were having a quick, business-like discussion and she realised they meant to wait for her to set the times, and then request they could have access at other times. She nodded, saying, "Yes that will be fine. I can let you know by the weekend." Ravi and Kkomae looked up in surprise.

N and Hyuk said one after the other, "She understands Hangguk." "But she doesn't speak it very fluently."

Ken looked at her, almost beaming with pride. She felt ridiculously happy that he looked at her like that, and tried not to smile back at him like an idiot.

"Really?" he said cutely. She couldn't help letting her eyes travel down from his gaze, to the hollow in his neck. God, what was wrong with her?! She looked back up to see him still smiling cutely at her, his eyes knowing. She was aghast that he had noticed her looking him up and down like that. At least he seemed polite enough not to acknowledge her lewd once-over.

Mr Kim then walked towards the door, with Ravi and the luggage guy following him. Ravi looked at her with amusement in his eyes and he nodded politely as he passed. The three of them went back outside and up the stairs.

Mikhalis walked over and said in Greek, "Mr Kkomae has your number. They don't want to have any meals prepared for them, so you won't have to worry about cooking. But they will require help ordering and going out."

He looked at her seriously.

"Will you be able to handle that?"

She nodded vigorously, maybe ten times, looking up at him with serious eyes. He nodded back at her once, slowly, then cocked his head slightly at Ken, who was next to him.

"I will be watching him. And you."

She clamped her lips tightly together and felt heat rising in her cheeks. She looked down as he passed, feeling a little ashamed that her dad had seen her gawking at someone like that.

**

Leo had steeled himself and walked slowly out into the light.

He was taken aback to see her look straight at him, but he simply dropped his gaze as if he hadn't noticed her. He took particular interest in the quality of the wood floors as he listened to the conversation he was pretending not to hear. Although he wasn't fluent in english, he could understand more than he could speak.

He heard her say her name: Siana.

He had seen Ken make a beeline for her immediately, and thought it was a little arrogant of him to act so.

But then, he also thought he wouldn't mind very much being the focus of the girl's attention. He saw that she couldn't take her eyes off Ken as he approached, and was sure Ken was turning on that cute smile for her as he walked up to her.

Leo positioned himself so that Hongbin was between all, and made a studied attempt to look at her over Hongbin's shoulder, pretending he was looking at Hongbin.

He saw her grinning from ear to ear at Ken who was towering over her, looking down at her, too close, he thought. She seemed to drop her eyes shyly, but not before she paused to stare at his lips or his neck or whatever it was girls seemed to like about Ken, Leo thought, a little bitterly.

But then she turned to look straight at him, or was it Hongbin? He simply stared at the back of Hongbin's head like that was where he was looking all the time.

Inside, he felt ridiculously stupid, but intensely gratified that he had gotten away with it. Hadn't he?

What did it matter? She was obviously enthralled by Ken's attentions. Leo wondered if she knew that Ken was like that to everyone. That she was getting what everyone got, easy. That Ken liked to spread himself around like that.

Leo frowned at himself. He was thinking some very miserly thoughts about Ken, he realised.

He wondered what could have possibly brought that about. He heard the tone of her voice change when she began talking to her father in their language. Then he heard her explain that she was teaching children. The girl that he had been watching illicitly in the mirror earlier, that same girl was teaching children.

He had no idea what had lead the conversation in this direction, and wondered what it had to do with anything.

When the boys started explaining that she would be setting times for them to use the space, he looked up with concern, finding himself looking into her eyes. Those brown eyes that were slightly upturned, and so invitingly pretty, stared straight at him for a moment, making him feel that despite himself, he wished he had been where Ken was for the last few minutes. Up close and being admired by her.

He turned to Hongbin, not exactly happy with the thoughts going through his head.

He heard Ravi and Kkomae leave, and Mr Mikhalis say a few words to her. He turned as if to look around the room, but looked into the mirror to see her expression. She seemed embarrassed, or worried.

And then there was quiet.

Hongbin casually walked up to Leo and patted him on the shoulder, saying, "Good thing you found that staircase, otherwise we would have missed all the introductions."

Leo looked at Hongbin, who smiled at him with an innocent expression. He couldn't help but glance back into the mirror to look at her again, at which Hongbin smiled even wider, shaking his head.

**

"Ah, Hyung, for a pokerface, you're pretty bad at this."

Before Leo could deny it, Hongbin yelled over his shoulder to the boys who were still crowded around Siana.

"We're hungry here!" He looked at Leo with a twinkle in his eye before leaving him to walk over to the others. Leo looked like his soul had left him.

"Maybe a little thirsty too." He said, just loud enough for Leo to hear. He heard a swish of fabric as Leo tried to take a swipe at him, but missed.

Hongbin smiled. It was so easy to bait Leo. You just had to observe and watch for those tells that gave away what was on his mind.

Hongbin realised Leo was often stony-faced because that was his defence mechanism, to keep from revealing himself and his motives to others. It was the very thing that showed he had something to hide. Hongbin shook his head. He had learned from young, that people thought they could hide what was really there for anyone to see, if they were looking. But most other people were busy hiding their own secrets to notice other people's ordeals.

Internally, Hongbin gave himself a pat on the back. I didn't spend years at a buddhist temple for nothing, he thought inanely, then laughing at himself. He approached the others, checking out the girl, Siana.

Hmm, it was hard to determine if she was Leo's type, since he never really let on about things like that. She was certainly pretty, and obviously fit with a good figure. She looked like she had been working out. Hongbin was sure that Leo had been spying on her earlier, and they had caught him coming out of the staircase, and not finding it, as he had made out. He wouldn't put it past Leo to do that. Leo, you rat, he thought to himself.

"Hi, I'm Hongbin," he said politely, nodding his head towards her. She nodded back politely too, her smile a little hesitant now she was surrounded by almost all of them.

"I know who you are. I mean, I know you are Vixx. I mean, I listen to kpop. I teach the dances back home." Siana seemed to stop herself, afraid she was gushing too much. Hongbin smiled at her as the boys erupted into pleased chatter about how even people in greece knew about them, and wasn't it great to find someone who was a fan in this town?

Through the chatter, Hongbin asked her, "Where are you from?"

Siana looked at him, surprised he was interested.

"I'm from Malaysia. Uh.. my mum is half-Korean. I live with her there, but I'm here for the holidays to help my dad."

Hyuk asked her, "Holidays? Are you at school?"

"I just graduated college."

Hyuk yayed and held up a hand for her to high-five. With wide eyes, she high-fived him, looking a little bewildered. Hongbin realised that they were about to spend a few weeks with someone who probably knew a lot more about them than they expected. And this person was to be looking after them like a butler or concierge would. And she was probably a bit dazed trying to get used to that fact.

He wondered if she were going to be able to do the job properly. After all, she was practically a teen and any teen could be a little crazy around the edges, depending on their character. She had said she helped her dad during the holidays, which meant she had done this before. Perhaps she was more level-headed than most kids her age. But looking after an idol group, let alone one she knew, or perhaps was an avid fan of... he had his doubts.

"Where can we have breakfast?" He asked, gently testing.

He was pleased to see she immediately focused and turned to face him. She spoke clearly in English, asking if they wanted something brought to them or if they would like to eat out.

Then her eyes brightened and she said they could walk to a cafe bistro nearby that was on the water, which served coffee and fingerfood all day.

Hongbin asked how they would get there. He saw that as she replied, she seemed relieved to be answering questions and being useful. There was no distraction in her eyes, no wandering gaze, no thoughtless words. He decided he liked Siana very much and mentally gave her a stamp of approval.

He felt rather than saw Leo's hulking presence at his back, and he laughed at his hyung's behaviour. He could simply come over and say hello, but there he was over-complicating things as usual. Hongbin wondered if he should just let Leo languish alone, or invite him in to the fun.

He turned and went over to him, saying loudly, "You hear that Leo-hyung? Coffee. I vote we go for a walk and have breakfast by the sea."

He heard Ken ask, "Do they have anything more than just snacks though?"

He was surprised to hear Siana answer, "They have ouzo too."

He clamped his hand onto Leo's arm and steered him towards the group.

All the boys were ooh-ing and aah-ing and asking about ouzo. She explained, looking more at Hyuk, who seemed to understand easily, that ouzo was served in the mornings and either drunk neat or with ice or water, to accompany coffees and breakfast tidbits. She continued, there used to be a tradition of men-only cafes that served ouzo for breakfast. But now, it was rare to see those old style cafes.

Hyuk asked what ouzo was, and she described it as alcohol made from aniseed, which gave it a minty, licorice taste.

Hongbin smiled. Did they really care what it tasted like? They were all watching her as she rolled out her tourist-guide spiel as if she were the most charming thing on earth.

If he didn't know his brothers better, he would think they were a pack of wolves circling Little Red Riding Hood.

But he knew them better. Hongbin snorted. They were all just baby lambs, and she was their Little Bo Peep.

**

Leo stood by Hongbin's side, watching and listening to Siana. She still hadn't acknowledged him since he had been dragged to the circle, and it bothered him. She was obviously younger and should show a certain amount of respect.

But he could see she was eager to impart information, and was looking N and Hyuk in the eye as Ken stood next to her, a little too closely, he thought. Then suddenly, he saw N link arms with her and start pulling her towards the door.

"Come on, why don't you show us the way?"

Hyuk and Ken clapped their hands, following, with Ken exclaiming, "Mama can we keep her? Please, please?"

Leo stuck his foot out to kick Ken in the shin, but Ken, his Leo-radar always on, sidestepped him neatly without even looking, and followed N and Siana up out of the room. Hongbin laughed, slapping Leo on the back. Hyuk followed behind Ken, pushing him up the stairs by his butt.

They all rose out of the stairwell and into the yard, where Ravi was still chatting with Kkomae and Mr Mikhalis. They explained they would go out for breakfast. Siana pulled out of N's grasp and said she needed to close up the rehearsal space and have a shower and change.

That was when N remembered that they had come down to get a spare key for their apartment from Mr Mikhalis. Siana said she had a spare key and that she would bring it down for them.

Which was when Hongbin turned to Leo and looked him up and down and said, a little loudly, "Hyung, don't you need to change too?"

Hongbin looked down at Leo's loose pyjama pants that were spilling out of his leather boots under his overcoat. Leo pulled his coat around his body.

N waved a hand at Leo. "Leo you go with Siana and get the key from her. Hurry up guys, so we can eat."

Siana finally looked at Leo, who met her gaze. She smiled a little nervously, then nodded quickly to them as she turned to go back down the stairs.

"I have to lock up first. Shall we meet in the lobby? I don't need long to get ready."

They all murmured in agreement, and then she turned and looked expectantly at Leo. After a moment, Hongbin gave him a gentle but firm push toward Siana, and Leo fell in behind her as she trotted down the stairs and back into the studio.

She waited for him to follow her in, then pulled the door shut and turned the lock. As she walked across the space, she passed the speakers to turn them off, and went ahead of Leo to the other doorway, waiting for him to catch up and letting him go up the stairs first. She turned off the studio light and stepped into the stairwell to pull the door shut, making it dark suddenly.

She reached gently up the wall till she found the little button and pressed it. In the sudden light she saw Leo was ahead on the stairs but had turned to face her. He was taken aback by the sudden exposure, and she smiled up at him as she pulled the door to and turned to lock it with a key.

She turned back to go up, waiting for him to continue ahead. He turned and led the way up, until they emerged in the lobby, by her father's open door. They could hear the others coming through the house, chatting.

She opened the door lift to let him walk in, but he hesitated, gesturing for her to go in first. Feeling awkward, she wanted him to go up in it alone so that she could take the stairs. She pulled on the sweatshirt she was wearing and made a face, as if she was too sweaty and uncomfortable joining him in the tiny cubicle.

Leo couldn't see himself riding the lift up while Siana walked up the stairs, so he gestured to the stairs for them both to go up.

Siana couldn't let the guest walk up the stairs because of her own discomfort, so with a sigh, Siana smiled and finally went in the lift, followed quickly by Leo.  
The cubicle was so small that she had no space to turn around to face the door as it shut because Leo had already entered the cab. She looked into the mirror at that was on the wall, and saw he was slouching to fit his frame in comfortably.

Leo was aghast. They were stuck unless he stepped back out again, but he wanted to get the situation over with. He looked to the wall on his left to find the floor number to press. They were literally push-buttons, the lift was that quaint.

"Number 3," he heard her say, and he duly pressed it. The lift jerked into motion and they rode up in silence, facing the back wall and mirror.

He sneaked a glance down at her face in the mirror, but she was looking down into her clasped hands. Her cheeks were flushed. From exercise? Or from being so close in the lift which he suddenly felt was too hot for comfort? Perhaps his cheeks were flushed too, he thought, mortified. He cleared his throat.

The lift ascended so slowly he regretted not taking the stairs. At least if they were both to do so, they would actually be doing something, instead of standing in silence, in a lift, going up.

He saw a little crease appear at the corner of her lips. Was she stifling a laugh? She looked up suddenly, her eyes merry with laughter as she chuckled a little. He was so taken with her sudden relaxed demeanour he forgot himself and smiled back. She seemed relieved and dropped her gaze down. He noticed she had a little mole high up on her jaw, just near her earlobe. He watched it for a moment as she tried to stop smiling.

Finally they reached her floor, and he backed out of the lift to let her out.

She unlocked her door and walked through, leaving the door open as he waited outside.

He saw a guitar propped against the far wall of an open living area, which contained a sofa bed facing the tv. She walked out of view to the left, and he stepped inside a little to see where she was going.

Adjacent to the living area, separated by a wall with no door, he saw straight into her bedroom. Out of habit, he stepped back and waited out of view as he heard her rummaging for the spare key in a drawer.

Then she was back, smiling. She held up the key and spoke, the first words for him since they had met.

"I have to keep this, so I will let you in. Shall we take the stairs this time?" He understood and let her lead the way up the stairs.

She ran up, two stairs at a time, reaching their door and opening it before he caught up. She pushed open the door and turned to face him.

"See you downstairs in ten minutes. Don't forget your key!" She rattled her copy in front of her eyes, which were bright with cheerfulness. He nodded, smiling, and went in. She pulled the door closed behind him and her heard her run back down.

Leo walked to his room, shedding the coat and about to peel off his sleepwear. The door to the balcony was still open as he had left it, and the room was too chilly. He closed it and undressed.

He kneeled in front of his baggage which he had opened and left splayed out like a patient on an unfortunate surgeon's table. Its contents had been rummaged through the night before as he searched for something to sleep in, and lay spilling out of the bag like entrails out of a long-dead victim.  
He found skinny jeans, a long white tee and a loose sweater to wear on top. Although it was still chilly from the night, the morning sky was clear and he knew it could become hot under the rising sun. He grabbed a large scarf to wrap around his neck and found a beanie for his head and fresh socks for his feet. He grabbed his phone and some money and walked out of the room, picking up his overcoat on the way. Outside, he put his shoes on and looked for the key, before leaving the house and puling the door shut.

He walked slowly down the stairs and listened for sounds from Siana's place as he passed by. At the ground floor, he found N, Hongbin and Hyuk by the lift, whilst Ravi and Ken were outside with the others. Hongbin looked up at Leo with eyebrows raised, his dimples like two accusing dots in his cheeks. Leo ignored him and turned to N.

"What was that all about? I thought we were on a break? Who decided we need rehearsal space anyway?" He asked.

N shook his head. "It's not like that. Ravi wants to do his dance practise, that's all. Mr Mikhalis is letting him use it for free because we took the rented the extra flat. So... score!"

N smiled cheerily. "Anyway, why are you complaining, you just said you wished you had a studio. There's one right here, and he's willing to rent that too."

"Hyung, do you really want to do some work? Already? We just got here." Hyuk asked, surprised.

Leo nodded, then shrugged.

Hyuk understood immediately. "So you did, but now you don't."

Leo nodded glumly. N sighed. "Is it diet that makes you the way you are? Because you do eat a lot of fried food, you know. I read somewhere that free radicals cause your brain synapses to fire wrongly."

"As long as they don't go to his hips, it's fine," said Hyuk defensively, patting Leo on the chest. "Leave my hyung alone, leader-nim!" He smacked N's shoulder.

Leo looked appreciatively into Hyuk's adoring eyes and drew his hand gently across the maknae's neck in another neck-slice. Hyuk squealed, making Leo laugh.

"Twice in one day! Thank you oppa!!!" Leo and Hyuk cringed at each other.

Hongbin rolled his eyes. Whatever bromance that was going on between Leo and Hyuk, he hoped it wasn't catching.

They heard a door shut upstairs and quick footsteps descending down the stairs. Without a word, Leo turned and walked out of the lobby, followed by Hyuk who was smiling inanely.

Hongbin looked at N and then out at Leo. N raised his eyebrows in questioning.

"What?"

Hongbin shook his head and turned to see Siana leaping down the stairs, at the last minute, slowing to smile. He nodded and waited, seeing N go up to her to give her a hand as she took the last step.

She looked a little surprised at the gentlemanly gesture, and Hongbin was sure that N knew she was capable of making her way surely down the stairs. Hongbin looked at N in surprise. Was N's gesture purely to make her feel taken care of? Hongbin raised his eyebrows.

Not N too? What was going on with everyone?

Hongbin shook his head. He knew Ken seemed gaga over her, but had assumed it was because he pretty much would cuddle and coo over any female thing that let him. Well, she had smiled so warmly at him that morning, Hongbin supposed that naturally Ken felt he had permission to fawn over her. Then again, Ken probably pulled out all his manly charms, whenever he could, with similar results, all the time.

And Leo... well, Leo seemed unable to process whatever was going on between him and her.

That left Ravi and Hyuk who seemed unperturbed by this creature in their midst. Hongbin felt Ravi was too preoccupied with work and improving himself, and Hyuk, although not really an innocent, was enjoying being single and busy and productive, and making friends and having fun.

Hongbin suspected that, despite his physique and cuteness, Hyuk was not one for emotional attachments, but rather had an affinity for people with a certain warped sense of humour that played up the strange, sometimes twisted nature of human beings. That explained his unusual relationship with Leo, where Hyuk must have found some touchpoint in Leo's character that allowed him to make fun of him in a way the others couldn't. Like the european fool in a medieval court who was allowed to say things others couldn't about the stern king.

Hongbin thought, if Vixx were characters from mythology, Hyuk would be Mercury, the messenger and mischief maker who governed intellectual thought.

Hongbin looked at N as he linked arms with her and said, "Let's go!" before steering her out the door.

And N would be Pabo Number 3, he thought as he followed them out.

**

Siana had showered and changed into jeans and a long sleeved tee, towel-dried her hair like there was no tomorrow, and found the cash wallet her father gave her for any guest purchases she would have to make.

She felt bewildered and a bit in shock. She had practically accidentally hugged Cha Hakyeon, though technically he had done the holding part, looked up into the amused eyes of Hyuk, had Ken make eyes at her and Ravi smile as he walked past. Then Hongbin had chatted with her and finally, after all that, the one creature she thought she might never ever meet in her lifetime, Leo, shared a giggle with her as they rode up facing the wrong way in the tiny lift.

Thank the heavens for that trusty old, tiny lift that can only fit two people, she thought wryly.

For such a momentous occasion as meeting her favourite pop idols, it went about as awkwardly as one could expect.

She had no time to think about it much, since they had graciously waited for her to change. She pulled a fresh hoodie out, zipped it up and pulled up the hood to keep her head warm till the sun warmed up the day, and grabbed her bubble jacket. At the door, she pulled on some calf-length boots, tucking her jeans into them.

She paused, questioning her fashion sense for moment. After-ski party on the bottom, marketplace housewife on the top.

When it came to fashion Siana always erred on the side of comfort. Like, whatever-is-clean-and-doesn't-restrict-breathing-or-bodily-functions kind of comfort. She had always been fine with that. Now, today, she wished she was a little more put together.

Ah, who cares? It wasn't like her clothes made her who she was. I make me who I am, she thought, smiling. Like how my mama taught me.

She grabbed her keys and practically flew down the stairs.

Almost into N's waiting arms, it seemed. He appeared at the foot of the stairs just as she was slowing down to take the last steps, and held his hand out for her. She was surprised, mostly because, she was practically taking the last step. But she couldn't deny it felt good to have a reason to take his hand, and to see his eyes smiling down at her.

He immediately linked arms with her, pulling her quite close into the side of his body as they walked out into the early morning sunshine.

"Siana smells delicious," he announced to everyone. She saw Leo and Ken turn to look at them. Leo looked at her briefly, then looked at N. The eye contact was too short, but it made her feel uncomfortable to be the centre of attention.

"Like a flower?" Ken said cutely.

"Like beef?" She heard Hyuk from behind her. She heard Hongbin smack him. Hyuk giggled, "But hyung, beef does smell delicious."

"Like flowers and wild herbs," N said. He must be smelling her shampoo, which was supposedly made from beer. It was a commercially-flavoured version of the real thing, which girls used to use to give their hair lustre. It had a bittersweet smell, almost like tea, or wheatgrass. She liked that N liked it as much as she did.

She disengaged from his arm, feeling a little too close for comfort. He took her arm again, winding it around his and asking her which way. When she pointed to the right, toward the centre of the town, and toward the sea, he started walking, pulling her along with him and calling for Hyuk to follow.

"Miss Siana, you know who we are, and you know how long we will be here. Your father has given us special assurance that we will enjoy our privacy while we are here. He says we can trust you. Is that true?"

Siana nodded as she half-listened to Hyuk's interpreting and half-understood N's own words.

"Not to say that other people here may know who we are, but if somehow our location is found out, it could make it difficult for us to stay here as we have planned."

She stopped and pulled out of his grasp to face him.

"I am a fan, but I'm not stupid. It would cost my father and myself very dearly if we were to cause a major problem for a customer. We have a strict confidentiality policy here, so that won't be a problem."

N looked a little taken aback. She realised she was probably not observing cultural formalities, but she wasn't very familiar with them even though she was partly of the same culture. She simply didn't have enough experience of it. She felt a little offended by N's presumption that she needed to be reminded of their professional relationship, when it was they who set the casual tone, and he who invited her to join them for breakfast.

Hyuk stepped in, saying gently that they had to take precautions for security reasons, and that he hoped she would understand. Siana nodded, and returned his smile. She realised the atmosphere was a little tense, so she asked them if they would feel more comfortable dealing with her father.

N shook his head, taking her arm once again and walking on. He made a gentle apology, which made her feel bad, so she apologised too. He changed the subject, asking her about her dancing.

She went with it, wanting the mood to lighten again. She told him how she had been dancing from young, and began working with a dance group who did mall events, backup dancing and commercials. It was mostly street, but she had done some training in ballet and ethnic dances.

He asked if she was a soloist, if she was experienced in dancing with partners and whether she had done her own choreography. She explained that mostly she performed in a group, but that she had done some partner work and choreography. She revealed that even when she had just graduated high school, she had been performing for almost five years before that as a semi-professional, and since starting college she had been teaching amateur kid dance classes here in Itea during the last three years' Christmas holidays.

"You started young. Like pop idols do," N said.

Hyuk asked if she would ever audition for a pop idol group, since she was obviously talented in dance.

"How would you know?" She asked. N and Hyuk looked at her sideways. She gasped. They nodded, their eyes alive with the memory of what they had seen that morning.

"How much did you see?!" She asked, her voice high. She shut her mouth and turned around to see if they others had heard. Her actions caught the attention of Hongbin, who was a little behind them, walking with Leo, Ken and Ravi. Hongbin came forward to hear.

"Enough to understand a LOT about you," joked N, sharing a laugh with Hyuk.

Siana was mortified. She may as well have been stripping, she thought in despair. She put a hand up to cover her face as she thought about how she had committed a hundred percent to her facial expressions as she has grinded against her imaginary partner that morning.

 _I mean, who does that at 6 in the morning?!_ She put her other hand up to cover her face. But then, she thought, hang on, there was nothing wrong about her dancing, which was intended for the public eye anyway, at one point. She dropped her hands, shaking her head.

 _Get real, Siana._ The only ones actually doing that kind of dancing for money were the six boys around her.

She looked at N, who was shaking his head too. "Why are you so embarrassed? We do that kind of thing all the time."

"Well, I- I didn't realise I had an audience!" She cried indignantly. Then she remembered the face she had seen, that there was someone else watching, in the shadows of the stairwell. She whipped her head around, a suspicious look on her face as she eyed the three boys who had come into the room that way: Ken, Hongbin and Leo.

She saw that Hongbin was already listening and watching her, and that he checked to see who she was looking at, frowning. He seemed to put two and two together.

Oh god! If this was news to him then it meant that it was either Ken or Leo who had been spying on her. She looked again.

And saw that whilst Ken was smiling and chatting with Ravi, Leo was watching her like a hawk, his mouth a stern line. There was something in his gaze, she couldn't tell if it was reproach or concern, but whatever it was, was like a heat that burned slow and deep.

He dropped his gaze, turning to listen to Ken's chatter. Siana felt her cheeks burn. Not Leo.

She was flustered, and felt silly for it. Like N said, people danced like that all the time. They practised, they performed, and they did it in groups, partners or alone. She knew the difference between the real feelings that inspired those moves, versus the professional reenactment of those feelings.

Sometimes, there was physical intimacy that could not be avoided when performing onstage, where guys and girls had to hold each other in certain ways to be safe, to keep their balance and to support each other. It couldn't be helped. A dancer had to think of their body as a tool and let go of their personal inhibitions so that another person, sometimes a relative stranger, could lift them or support them. Legs, armpits, under the boobs, under the butt, almost in the crotch... whatever offered the best grip, she supposed.

But this... she realised why this upset her so much. It was because that morning she wasn't performing for work. She was calling up those feelings that dancing stirred up in her sometimes, very private feelings that she felt should only be for her, and for a future someone whom she felt she could get close to, and be vulnerable with.

And now she found that she had inadvertently shared that private space with at least three men. Pop idols she had fangirled and fantasised over for at least two years. Her mortification turned to shame. Then that shame turned to indignance.

"You were spying on me?"

N and Hyuk saw the change in her and looked at each other, all serious. N turned to her, concerned.

"Yes. We saw you." His admission took the steam out of her anger, calming her down a little. He continued.

"Don't get us wrong, we were just watching a dance practise. Dancing should be seen. It is why we do it. So we didn't think we were spying. But we should have announced ourselves. Sorry about that."

Siana got what he meant immediately, understanding and accepting his explanation. Whoever the other person was... had still not revealed himself. That was a different story altogether.

Siana walked with N and Hyuk in silence. Things seemed to suddenly be very complicated. she tried to shake off the feeling of discomfort by replaying N's words. She got what he meant, and realised they were the same kind of people.

They believed dancing was meant to be seen, an expression that bypassed the limitations of words. She became thoughtful. Much as she loved performing on stage, there was something about choreography which was limiting. A dance routine was meant to be perfect, to follow the music, to be in sync, and to have the same effect, each and every performance.

But dancing freely to music, like in a club or at a party... that was harder to do for some people. Unless you just wanted to rock from side to side, you needed to have knowledge of dance moves, like a dance vocabulary, and yet be unfettered by them, and let them make you feel free. This was what she loved about street dance in general.  
Since she was sixteen, she had spent her winter holidays clubbing with her cousins. Because the towns were so small, as long as you behaved, no one really looked into the ages of their clubbers. She was with her cousins, which made her dad feel better. Even so, it was he who suggested she go out with them, since nights in little Itea could be tediously boring without anything to do, and he wanted her to benefit from being with good company.

Dancing with her cousins was great. There was no pressure on her and she felt they had her back.

They would dance altogether on the floor, sometimes in empty clubs, sometimes in clubs bursting at the seems with the influx of tourists coming to ski at the Mount Parnassus resort, or at the annual winter dance party just outside of Itea in an old empty restaurant slash dance hall on the hill facing the sea to the west. It was her uncle's place, and had become so popular he opened it on the weekends and was now a full-fledged club by the sea.

She wondered out of the six member of Vixx, which members needed choreography to dance, and which could let their body lead them?

She knew about N and his dance training, but he seemed to have more of a contemporary dance background. She smiled. Like ballet dancers, sometimes classically trained people had no swag whatsoever. But, N did have a certain extra that made him stand out on stage, she knew that. He could work it when he needed to. Then there was Ravi, who was obviously into street and hip hop. And Ken, who seemed so at ease and, as she had found out earlier, wasn't afraid to use his body up close and personal. That left Hyuk, Hongbin and Leo. Hyuk seemed like he would have fun and be keen to keep spirits up. Hongbin... well she wasn't quite sure what to make of Hongbin, except that he seemed thoughtful and very gentlemanly. So far, he seemed to be a little reserved, studying and commenting on whatever was happening. As for Leo, she assumed he would be too self-conscious to truly let go on the dance floor. She imagined it would be worse if people were aware of who he was.

She wondered what it would be like to feel like people were watching your every move, taking pictures and then analysing them on social media.  
It seemed that life could be miserable if someone in the limelight couldn't take that kind of scrutiny. Even worse for someone in the limelight for the wrong reasons.

She looked up at N, who had secured her arm under his again, and was smiling to himself as he stared ahead. On the other side of him, Hyuk was looking at the orange trees that had been planted on the sidewalk, one every few metres. They were bearing fruit, but she knew that these ones would not be suitable for eating. They were just too sour.

She didn't know why there were orange trees decorating the sidewalk, even though they had been growing there ever since she could remember. She would often help neighbours pick oranges for their jams. But all the kids knew not to bother eating them.

She felt a sudden surge of feeling. They seemed so engaged with the world she loved, even though they were who they were. They were all not that much older than her, but they didn't seem to have that off-hand demeanour a lot of guys that age could have. Politeness and positivity seemed to permeate their personalities, but she wondered how much of it was a product of their training.

She thought of Leo and realised, training obviously couldn't "fix" everything. She smirked. Not that that was a bad thing. She had been drawn to his persona from the beginning, seemingly aloof, but eventually revealing an awkwardness she found both cringingly embarrassing, and endearing. And more recently, she had discovered he had a sense of humour, even though he never seemed to be able to get one up on his faster, more cunning brothers - they always got the better of him.

Did that suggest that he had a kinder, gentler nature than people normally assumed? Well, she wouldn't really know. After all, whatever she knew about them was simply what had been recorded, reported, and probably scripted to a certain extent.

They reached the end of the street, which was actually one side of a "Y" in the road. She motioned for them to cross the road carefully, since it curved slightly and had bad sightlines, and traffic moved fast.

She was happy to be showing them the little building which was situated on a large plot, right by the sea. It was a single-story building, rather like an American stand-alone diner, which was suitably named Miami. It wasn't very big - large enough for a fully-stocked bar, a huge tv, a few tables and chairs and bathrooms. The rest of the patrons would sit outside in the cold winter air, or on the plastic-covered patio, which was still outside but offered some protection from the elements and had a few outdoor heaters.

Today, a sunny winter's day, the place was packed.

To the left of it, was the beginning of a stretch of pebble beach, formed from the minor land reclamation during the building of Itea. To the right, the stretch of the esplanade, a wide paved area, wider than a road, on which cafes put out chairs and tables for customers to chat over coffees and mezze - the greek equivalent of tapas - as they listened to the gentle waves lapping at the stone boardwalk.

All the cafes were actually situated back across the street in the row of shoplots that faced the sea. So waiters had to cross the road with the coffees and food. Now during the winter, there weren't enough customers happy to sit in the cold, so there was little of that business.

However Miami prospered from having its cafe and open area in one place. It seemed to be the only place that was busy all day.

Today was no exception. Although it was still early, not yet eight in the morning, there were already the usual older men dressed in their trenches and overcoats, sitting facing the sea like crows, sipping on iced ouzo and munching on cold cuts and olives and cheese. Some brought their wives with them , but most were seeking refuge from a noisy home. Later, the younger, cooler crowd would come in, then the lunch crowd and them families and the after-work customers. At night, it stayed open and served dinner, then would close just before nightclubs would fill up. Despite being a small town, there was a little nightlife to speak of.

She knew the place would make toasted sandwiches for breakfast, and she hoped the boys would be alright with the limited choice. She let go of N's arm to walk ahead to greet the barista, who was related to the owner. He was a handsome man in his thirties who liked to groom his beard and salt-and-pepper undercut hairstyle just so. He always pulled his sleeves up to reveal his muscly forearms, and had a tattoo peeking out from under one of the cuffs.

"Yeiasou Affendi," she said, calling him "boss" in Greek. She didn't really know his name, only that that was what she called him, and that his family knew her dad. The word was probably left over from Ottoman rule, because she knew it as a middle eastern name which many muslims in her country had. He looked up, and without smiling, let a twinkle come in his eye as he gazed at her while he washed used glasses.

"Who said you could come back here?" he drawled, teasing her with his stony face on.

"Nobody."

"Bring him here, I wanna speak with him," he growled. She laughed, happy to be teased by him.

"You're laughing at me? You little runt." He flicked soapy water at her. "How is your mum?" He asked, finally letting some warmth into his voice.

"She is good, she sends her regards to your family."

"I see you have brought some friends. Are they guests?" Siana nodded. "Go and sit down, I'll come take your order."

"No, I won't be staying, they just asked me to show them here."

"But you speak better Greek than I can speak English, so stay to help me first." She rolled her eyes at him and went to see the guys.

Mr Kkomae, the luggage guy, whose name she found out was Min Seok, N, Ravi and Leo were seated, whilst the others had strolled to the tiny jetty that divided the pebble beach on the left from the esplanade on the right. She could hear their feet kicking at the pebbles. N was chatting to Mr Kkomae, while Ravi and Leo had sat facing the sun, letting its rising warmth heat their faces. She couldn't tell if they were sleeping behind their dark glasses, but they certainly looked relaxed.

The wonders of fresh sea air and sunlight.

N turned to her as she walked up to them.

"They just have small snack plates, or toasted sandwiches. Cheese, tomato and ham toasties, in any combination. Also espresso coffee or greek coffee. Hot chocolate. Juice. And ouzo. Will that be alright for you?"

Mr Kkomae nodded.

"So I will help you order and let you enjoy your breakfast-"

"No you must join us," N said, gesturing to an empty seat between him and Leo.

"Er... I have to go to the market- "

"Perfect!" N interjected. "I love markets. We'll come with you. After breakfast."

Siana looked at him as he smiled up at her, his eyes naughty. She glanced at Leo and Ravi, who seemed to be ignoring everyone. Mr Kkomae nodded obligingly and gestured to the seat. Reluctantly, she sat down. She was hoping to spend her first day at the market alone. It was a ritual she liked to do when she first came here. She would meet up with old neighbours and speak to vendors from nearby towns, and check out the goods and fresh foods available.

She also felt a residual discomfort from the day's events and didn't know where she stood. It was obvious N, Ken and Hyuk were eager to have her hang out, but the others seemed to keep to themselves. And proximity to hot-and-cold Leo was not helping her nerves.

"You're so pushy, she may not want to join us," Ravi drawled out of his lazy, sun-bathing mouth.

"Don't say that, it sounds like you are encouraging her to leave," N countered. Ravi pulled his glasses down to peek over them as he lifted his head to speak to her. She let herself stare into his eyes for that tiny moment. Without makeup, he looked gentle and sleepy, like he had just woken up. Not the sharp, edgy Ravi she felt his stage persona was.

"You're very welcome to do whatever you want. How do you say "we don't stand on ceremony"?" he asked Kkomae, who explained to her quickly that they didn't have expectations of her to stay as their host. She nodded with a smile as Ravi leaned back again and pushed back his sunglasses.

"We can discuss things to do here, after all, that is what she is supposed to help us with, right Siana?" N looked at her. They were suddenly interrupted by the Boss, who turned up to take their order.

Mr Kkomae called out to the others to come order, but they ignored him. He ordered for them. Toasted sandwiches, mezze, lattes and juices. Siana asked for a greek coffee and a melomakarono, a honey syrup-soaked shortbready biscuit made with cinnamon and nuts.

She introduced Mr Kkomae and explained they were staying at their apartment for a few weeks. Boss smiled and said they could call him Con, which was short for Costas.  
Incredulously she looked at him and told him that was the first she knew his real name. "Huh, and you thought you knew me," he retorted smartly, giving her a glare as he left.

N regarded her closely.

"Is he mad at you?"

Siana shook her head, laughing, explaining that that was his sense of humour. She explained that she always called him Affendi, because people called the person in charge Boss. Really, his older brother owned it.

She asked N what she should tell people if they asked who they were. It was a small town and there was no doubt people would ask about them, since they already stood out anyway. The locals knew when there were tourists in their midst, and always became curious about long-staying guests.

"Tell them we are models," N said confidently.

She snickered before she could stop herself. His self-confidence was very amusing. He gave her a look.

"You're laughing? We absolutely look like models. Look at Ravi and Leo. We can't do much about Ken, but he is trying his best."

It took a superhuman effort for Siana not to turn and look at Ravi and Leo at N's command. She heard Ravi laugh low in this throat, a rumble that sent a warm tingle down her spine.

"Oh no, Ken's doing very well in that department," she said before she knew it. She regretted it instantly. N narrowed his eyes, seizing an opportunity.

"KEN-SSI!!" He yelled out to Ken. Siana's first instinct was to clap a hand over N's mouth, but she controlled herself, panic rising. Ken yelled back, looking like an annoyed child forced to stop playing.

"Come here!" Ken ignored him and went back to skipping stones over the still water with the others.

Ravi propped his sunglasses on his head and sat up, grinning. She had always thought he had the most delicious-looking overbite, and she loved when he did this thing with his lips where they twitched with amusement, drawing attention to their shape. She pulled her eyes up to look into his, not wanting to be caught gawking, but he was smiling at N, who raised an eyebrow at him.

"It makes sense. And it will throw people off the truth because it just makes so much sense. Am I right?"

N looked around for affirmation. Ravi looked amusedly at Siana, who was looking from person to person. When she finally looked at him, he laughed and shrugged.

"N is always right, even when he is full of himself."

"That's right." N nodded smugly, and somehow without arrogance. Maybe because of the twinkle in his eye, or that smirk pulling on his mouth. He looked at Siana and smiled warmly. She was beginning to understand this creature called N.

**

When the food arrived, all the boys gathered and began devouring their breakfast. She wondered if there was enough in the town to feed them three times a day a the rate they ate. Her greek coffee arrived, and it piqued their interest.

  
It came in a tiny cup, and was a rich dark brown and smelled heavenly. She saw Leo eyeing it curiously and gestured for him to smell it. He leaned in, that long straight nose so close to her cup, and closed his eyes as he drew in the aroma. His eyes fluttered open as he smiled. She smiled a little, taking a sip. It was still scalding hot, so she set it down and munched on her pastry.

She took her time, listening politely to the idle chatter, because she had to wait for them to finish and accompany them to the market. She was itching to go, feeling a little like an unnecessary party in the mix. Except for the few odd interactions she had had with Leo, he sat next to her in almost stony silence. Because she was so highly aware of him, and because she was trying very hard not to fangirl or be silly, she felt as if he was almost resentful of her presence.

Finally Hongbin turned to her and asked what they could do to pass the time.

She said dryly, "Skiing, visiting Delphi and Arachova, walking, eating, coffee and clubbing."

Hongbin laughed. "Oh wow, you sound so excited."

Siana smiled. "It's all exciting, but that is really all there is to do. You can also visit the nearby monastery, the olive groves, and there's a wind farm near here which is really spectacular. But that is all there is to do other than hanging out."

"Eating sounds good, let's do that everyday," said Ken.

"I've never gone skiing," said Hyuk.

"I want to visit all the historical places," said N.

"We never go clubbing, what's clubbing like here?" asked Ravi.

Siana perked up at that. She described how there was a bit of an underground scene, because of the bigger towns of Amfissa and Arachova, and the irregular influx of Athenians who liked to party after skiing. Sometimes there were raves, but she was more into hanging with her cousins and dancing.

She noticed Leo look her way when she said that. It seemed like he was about to ask her something, but thought the better of it.

Mr Kkomae asked if they had to book to see the various places. Siana answered that unless they wanted to book skiing lessons, even going skiing was open to anyone anytime as long as the snow and weather were good. She said that it had not been cold enough, and skiing on Mt Parnassus at the moment was limited to the kiddie slopes in front of the resort cafe. They would have to wait for a good snowfall before they could try the skiing.

She thought of something. There was an alpine valley at the foot of the snowcap where businesses opened eateries and last pit-stops for ski gear. They offered hang-gliding and paragliding off the cliffs near there. Even watching others do it was exciting, because they would soar over the deep valley below with the sea in the distance and the sun on their backs. And even if they weren't interested in that, the mountain lamb on offer at the eateries was to die for.

If they wanted to visit the mountain sooner, they could still do things other than skiing.

N looked at Siana.

"Can you plan something for us?"

She nodded happily. This was what she was here for. She sipped the last of her coffee, being careful not to drink in the half-inch of thick coffee grounds left in the cup. She spoke to N, but it was for the benefit of Leo, since she knew he was a coffee freak.

"The Greeks use their coffee to tell fortunes to each other. Usually grandmas and mothers know how to read their cups."

She swirled the "mud" around in her cup to loosen it with the little liquid left. Then she covered the cup with the upturned saucer and deftly flipped it over, letting the coffee slide down the sides. She let it sit in its saucer while the boys stared at the coffee beginning to seep out at the bottom.

"Do you believe in that sort of thing?" Hongbin asked.

"I don't think it's set in stone, but I have had some things told to me which had some truth. I like the idea of a psychic connection, which can develop between close friends. Like when you can tell what someone else is thinking, or you finish their sentences for them. Maybe that's what really happens when people read each other's cups. They're picking up vibes."

"I love that sort of stuff," said N. "What does your cup say?"

Siana shook her head. "I can't read cups."

All the boys groaned, muttering that they were hoping for a show of her talent. N picked up the cup and gingerly turned it over. Siana peered into it with him.

It just looked like mudtrails left by the tiny crabs she used to watch make their way across the muddy beach in Sabah.

"You're supposed to see things in the coffee, and also in the white cup. Where you drink is closest to you in time, and opposite is a time of either 6 hours, days or months away from now. If you see a fish, it means anxiety. If you see a cat, it means someone close to you is jealous. If you see a dog, that's a loyal friend. Lots of bubbles means lots of people and activity. That sort of thing," she smiled, a little self-conscious about it all.

N looked up, his mouth open in disbelief.

"I think I can see all of that."

"What? Where?" Hyuk took it from him and looked into it with Ken and Hongbin. they all exclaimed, pointing out where they thought they could see a cat or dog or bubbles or fish. They disagreed on what they saw, making Siana laugh.

"That's why I can't read cups. When someone tells me they see a cat and try to point it out to me, I can't see it. So, it's entirely subjective what someone sees. That's why I think it's more about a psychic connection."

"What does subjective mean?" Hyuk asked.

"When the meaning or interpretation of something is very personal rather than neutral. If it were neutral it would be objective."

Hyuk smiled, pleased to learn something new in english.

"Come on, we should go, before they pack up the markets," she said. She gestured to Affendi, who lifted his chin in acknowledgement. He brought over the bill, and she waited to see if Mr Kkomae would be paying, otherwise she would front the payment and they would bill them later. Sometimes guests turned up without enough cash until they could go withdraw some, so they were always prepared with some money for that purpose.

Siana didn't notice Leo pick up the abandoned cup and look into it. He turned the cup round and round, figuring he did see a fish at the bottom of the cup. He searched for other images, feeling like he could make any of the shapes look like something he wanted them to. Rather like seeing shapes in clouds. It was interesting because it was finding something hidden, but he couldn't see the point of it. Then he saw it, the face of a cat. He looked closely, and found he could not deny that it was definitely the face of a cat, and couldn't be mistaken for something else. He turned the cup to see what was near the place where she drank from.

He saw a large, dark figure of a man, looming over a small figure, which was lying prone at his feet. He felt a tingle run up the length of his arms. He put the cup down, laughing a little to himself. What, was he a fortune-teller now? He flipped it so that it was upside down.

Kkomae paid, and they got up, putting on various scarves and hats and coats. Siana led the way, and was caught up to very quickly by N and Hyuk. The rest followed behind, watching N chatter to Siana with the assistance of Hyuk.

**

  
Leo walked next to Ravi, thankful for Ravi's self-absorption. Much as N was someone who had his back and understood him on a level others didn't seem to display, Ravi had a neutral vibe to him that relaxed Leo. He liked that Ravi never initiated any teasing. He only reacted to people teasing him, or reacted to others' silly behaviour. He seemed to walk through life with a deep, quiet confidence and acceptance of whatever came his way, whilst at the same time going for what he wanted with a single-mindedness that left Leo in awe.

He felt that Ravi didn't judge anyone, not even in the privacy of his own mind or feelings. It was for that reason Leo felt he was the gentlest of all of them because he had no spiteful bone in his body, even when he wrote his lyrics. Because no matter what, Ravi would never use whatever moral ammunition he had on you, against you.

On the other hand, it was terribly annoying to find that Ravi seemed to have almost no desire to connect deeply with any particular person. He liked steady, non-committal relationships that were grounded in work and responsibility. And unlike himself, Ravi was a workhorse who scheduled his own work if there was none to do. When others were looking forward to rest, Ravi became antsy and listless.

Leo stayed close by his side because he felt Ravi was the least affected by Siana's presence. Besides perhaps, Hongbin. Everyone else had displayed an uncommon interest in her, and it irked Leo.

He felt a little betrayed by N, who was busy forming an easy friendship with Siana without including him. He resented Hyuk for his fabulous english and his boyish charms. He hated that Siana didn't realise that Ken was generous with his flirting and would flirt with grandmas and grandpas with that overloaded eye smile. He felt sore that he had none of these things to share with her, and that he was being left behind somehow. He realised that she was probably wondering if she was somehow unlikeable to him, since he was keeping an uneasy distance between them.

N often admonished him for overthinking and over-compensating for what he perceived he was lacking.

"We are all born perfect. We are all born loveable," N would say. He couldn't understand how N could have such utter faith in himself, even when he was making a fool of himself on tv.

"You care too much about what people will think of you. But they already love you or hate you, and there is nothing you can do about it. So relax. Be like Ravi and don't worry about the haters. UGH why am I talking to you, everyone knows you are the fan favourite anyway, Hamjji."

Then N would hug him tight and pretend to struggle. "Let me go, get away from me! Stop it, Taekwoon!" Then Leo would laugh at his silliness and be embarrassed by N's words, and try to follow his advice.

He felt he was making progress, especially beginning to feel comfortable with having no control over how he appeared on tv. The boys had cottoned on to the reasons for his self-consciousness: that he didn't want to make a fool of himself unknowingly. Which is why they knowingly made a fool of him all the time, making sure he was really clear on that fact. So, sadly for him, who the one who most cared about appearing cool and self-possessed, he was the one who most often fell prey to humiliation and razzing on the set. Even though N got a lot of it, he knew how to give back. Leo was always at a loss for words when it came to striking back verbally.

He was pleasantly surprised to find the fans loved to see that vulnerable side of him, and began to relax a lot more with his brothers on set, allowing himself to be the weary, sad, old, weak and put-upon prey that Hyuk liked to call him. He really was a grandpa in the group.

It was funny because he had grown up the youngest, spoiled rotten and fawned over by his all-female siblings. Well, he supposed it must have been to prepare him for this life, with all the feminine teasing he had had to put up with in his life. He smiled, feeling warm and loved.

They turned into a side road and came into full view of the bustling market. The sun was high in the sky now, and shone down on umbrellas and carts an utility trucks laden with fresh produce. Besides fruit, honey, olives, grains, meats and fish, there were clothes and accessories, plasticware and fresh cooked snacks on sale. The boys split up, wandering slowly between the carts, avoiding grumpy morning shoppers and loud workers shouting at each other across the way.

Leo noticed that some people stared at them blatantly, some out of curiosity and some seemingly glaring with hostility. But most of them would break that glare with a smile when he caught their eye and gesture for him to come inspect their wares. He looked ahead to see Siana chatting loudly in Greek with the poultry farmer, who had stacks of fresh eggs on the ground at his feet.

He watched her as she smiled at the rugged older man, whose white handlebar moustache was impressive. He recognised that people knew her and liked her very much. At the very least she had a pleasant relationship with them as a customer. He saw another man come out from behind a van and approach them, and realised he must have been the vendor's son, because except for the moustache, they looked almost alike. The son walked up to Siana with a serious look on his face, put his arm lightly around her waist and leaned in sideways to kiss her on the side of her head. Her hair, now dry, shimmered in the sun as she looked up at him with a smile.

It was brief and the guy pulled back immediately to look into her eyes and smile at her, before moving away to continue working.

But Leo felt a stab of jealousy. He didn't like the intimacy with which the guy had come forward and greeted her like that. His hand had lingered at her small waist, and he was sure he saw the man's fingers curl into her flesh. Leo realised he was being silly. How could that be if she was wearing several layers of clothing?

He looked at Siana, trying to figure out what their relationship was. She hadn't let the kiss interrupt her chatter with the vendor, except for a quick verbal acknowledgement to the son. Leo rationalised that maybe everyone greeted each other a little intimately here in Greece. He wanted to confirm that.

He followed at a distance, half-listening and looking at the things Ravi and Hongbin were pointing out by his side.

She moved on, rushing over to an older lady who was behind a counter packed with wild vegetables, sacks of onions and garlic, dried herbs tied in bundles, in jars and plastic bags, and large jars of what looked like honey. The older lady opened her arms and hugged her warmly, pulling back to push the hair out of Siana's eyes and take a closer look at her. Her hair had dried under the sun and flipped prettily over her shoulder.

Leo watched her lips moving as she talked and smiled at the lady. Then he saw the young man from before come up and stand next to them, gesturing to the lady, who smacked him on the shoulder. He didn't even flinch, his face as serious as before, whilst the older lady and Siana burst into laughter. He felt a little more at ease as he surmised that she must know them very well, or even be related.

Then he heard a man's voice call out her name. He looked up to see a tall man with dirty blonde hair walking over from further along, whom he recognised as the one he had seen holding her on the basketball court the evening before. He wanted to see what exactly was up with that guy. He had been holding her so close when they had passed, and Leo's curiosity was getting the better of him. He watched as the guy walked up, almost a full head taller than her, and stop next to the group of them. Leo was surprised when he leaned over and kissed the older lady on the cheek, and she ruffled his hair happily.

Then Siana playfully punched the guy in the stomach, which he skilfully dodged. Both the women turned and looked at the blonde guy with mock anger, arms on their hips. Siana laughed and stepped away from them all with ease, which made Leo think they were very close indeed, since she could leave them casually. He followed her with his eyes until she walked passed him and ahead. As he turned to watch her, his eyes met Hongbin, who was standing right next to him, watching intently. He blinked, caught, but schooled his features immediately. Out of habit, he wouldn't let on what he was thinking or what he was doing, whenever he was caught red-handed.

Hongbin shook his head, a look of pity on his face.

"You are like a child who hides behind the curtain and lets his feet show underneath, hyung."

"They sell honey here, maybe we should get some." Leo looked around, as if honey was all he needed.

"Besides looking like a stalker, you stick out like a sore thumb with that face of yours."

Leo looked around and realised that he stood head and shoulders above the crowd that was milling about him, and that more than a few people, including Siana's friends, were eyeing him with either appraisal or approval in their eyes. He made to move, but Hongbin shifted into his way.

"At least Ken knows how to keep things light, but hyung, you like to get serious about things."

Leo looked blankly at Hongbin , then tried to sidestep him again.

 

Hongbin let him go, shaking his head.

He saw the older lady looking at him as she was flanked by the two men behind her. He smiled and nodded politely, stepping forward out of courtesy. They watched him carefully as he approached, his dimples on full blast. He certainly wasn't one for physical appearances, but he knew what worked, and the dimples were his initial ace.

He bowed politely and gestured towards the way Siana had gone, saying, "We are guests, staying at Siana's house," in his tentative English, not knowing if they even knew the language. The blonde nodded and extended his hand with a bright smile. Hongbin noted that while relaxed, his face looked austere, but when lit with a smile, his eyes twinkled and his own killer dimples appeared.

"I am Siana's cousin. Panos. This is my aunt, Maria, and my cousin, Yianni."

Hongbin introduced himself, shaking their hands. He turned to look for Leo, but he had disappeared. He mentioned that there were a bunch of them travelling together, but they must have gone on ahead.

  
Panos welcomed him and asked how long they would be staying and if they had ever been to Greece before. He invited Hongbin to his dad's hotel which was by the waterfront near the edge of town, where they could rent boats or have coffees or dinner. Hongbin nodded politely, going to leave. Panos nodded as well, saying he would mention it to

Siana, whom he would be seeing later. He then thought of something, and asked Hongbin if he liked basketball.

Hongbin nodded and shrugged at the same time. He could play well enough. Panos invited him to a basketball game at 4 that afternoon. He pointed to a small street further up, and Hongbin saw that there was a playground there, with a basketball hoop standing in a half-court next to it. He brightened and nodded. 4 o-clock.

Hongbin left and went looking for everyone else. He passed the basketball court, mentally noting its location, then came to a small junction in the road where someone had set up a fire using a large empty oil drum. Around it, a couple of swarthy old men stood hunched over their cigarettes, while Ken, N and Hyuk stood as close as they could, looking like scared chickens next to the older men.

Hongbin smiled. No matter how tall they were, or how manly they all could be, they necessarily looked effeminate next to other men who weren't primped up like they were. It was part of their trade, to look their prettiest best for their fans. Sometimes he wondered if any of them would ever be allowed to grow out a beard or moustache. Not that they wanted to, but it put a lot of pressure on them to look a certain way all the time.

Whatever. Hongbin had no delusions about why he was in the group. He wanted to work and be successful and make his loved ones proud. Comparisons with the others in the group were inevitable, and whilst they sometimes hurt, he was a realist through and through who looked at life through a wry understanding that life was funny and painful and happened whilst you waited for it to get better. So, instead of waiting for life to get the better of you, you had to live the life you wanted to live. Like Ravi, he just did what he had to do with whatever talent or skill that he had.

Further ahead he saw Leo catch up to Ravi, and then Siana coming from another direction, several plastic bags in her hands. He caught her eye and smiled, and the boys turned to see her and offer to carry the goods she was holding. She looked pleased with her things as she shook her head. She said she had talked to Mr Kkomae, who mentioned they would stay out and have lunch. She would go on ahead and let them have some time to themselves.

She said goodbye and turned to leave as they said their loud goodbyes to her.

Hongbin looked around surreptitiously at Leo. He saw Leo watching her leave. When Ravi looked up to call out a goodbye to her, Leo looked down, pretending he hadn't noticed. 

Hongbin rolled his eyes. 

Pabo Hyung just couldn't hide it. He was falling for Siana, hard.

 

**

 

Siana walked up to her father's apartment and rang the doorbell. She listened for a moment, hearing nothing. He must be at work, she thought, so she pulled out her key and let herself in, slipping off her bubble jacket and hanging it by the door.

  
She called out that she was in the house and went to the kitchen to put some honey, vegetables and eggs away in the fridge and cupboards. She put what was left for her into two bags and left them by the front door before going deeper into his flat to find him in his den, sitting in front of a couple of computer monitors with his head phones on.

She tapped him on the shoulder, giving him a fright.

"Ana, for god's sake!"

"I rang and I called and you didn't hear me, so, tough." She smiled down at him.

"I brought some stuff from the market," she said, leaning on a sideboard that stored an assortment of hard disks, old records, and books.

"Oh, how are the guests?"

"They're fine, they're still there. Dad, did you know who they were before they got here?"

"No, the booking came through online as usual. Then I got a call from Mr Kkomae, and we went over some details, like how busy we are with tourists. I realise now why he was so concerned about their privacy. So you know of them?" Mikhalis asked.

"They're the group whose concert I told you about. That's happening back home at the end of the year."

Mikhalis nodded thoughtfully. He leaned back in his chair and sighed. "Well, lucky you. You get to spend a few weeks with them up close."

Siana looked at her dad. She could tell he was trying to gauge her reaction. Well, she wasn't about to fangirl in front of him, seeing as he already knew how disappointed she had been that she couldn't see them live - before she knew they were staying upstairs from her, that is.

Mikhalis looked back at her for a moment. Then he sat up and leaned forward.

"You know, for a band who are concerned about their privacy, they don't seem to care about keeping to themselves too much."

Siana knew what he was getting at. She was about to receive a warning about boys and boys who travelled in packs.

"They're not a band, they're an idol group," she protested weakly.

"I know what they are. They're a well-oiled machine who are playing a survival game. Half of what they do is constrained by contract rules and the other half is highly rehearsed. It's all paid for by the company or a sponsor, so none of them have much leeway, especially when it comes to their personal lives. Make no mistake, Ana mou." My Ana. "You don't know what is genuine and what is for effect."

"You just said they don't care about keeping to themselves. Maybe they really are just... relaxed about things." Siana shrugged nonchalantly. She didn't like what she thought was coming.

"I've worked with composers who have intimate knowledge of that industry. It looks like bubblegum pop, but in truth it is competitive, and cruel. Fans think they own their idols because they pay for their music, their concerts, their merchandise, and even gifts out of their own pocket. But Siana, the true exchange happens between the fans and the companies. The idols are just the face that sells the music."

"But you know there is real talent there."

"Of course there is. We're not talking about that. What I'm saying is that, you can't ever believe that any friendship that you form with them could be real or lasting. Not unless you want to expose yourself to that world."

Siana was taken aback. Much as she had fantasised about this day, and much as she had fantasised about being wonderously close to Vixx as a fangirl hankering over her posters and the videos she watched, she never once thought she would form close friendships with her famous guests. Heck, she had trouble speaking to them from sheer nerves. She was annoyed that her dad thought she had so little control over herself.

"Dad, I'm not going to be anything more than what is expected of me by you and by them as paying guests. You don't seriously believe I hope to make friends?"

Mikhalis laughed, shaking his head. She sighed, exasperated.

"I don't have any issues with you and your ability to do your job well. I'm talking about those boys."

Siana was stunned. What?

Mikhalis continued.

  
"I saw how they were around you. They're in a private place away from their world, they're very sure of themselves because they are successful and talented and good-looking, and here you are, the flower in their midst. Instead of keeping their distance, they were practically all over you. I was a boy once. I know what's going on in their heads."

"DAD!" Siana practically shrieked. Aah, it was so awkward hearing this come from him! She started babbling, anything to prevent him from saying anything else.

"Please, let's not talk about it anymore! Just please believe that I will alright and I won't lose my head around them, okay? Besides this I have other things to do, like the classes and seeing Panos and the boys, and mum's things... So, can we, can we just not?!"

Siana left the room like a bullet, stopping only to pick up her bags and throw her jacket over her arm.

She heard him call out after her, "Hyenas. They're hyenas!" before laughing out loud. He was obviously tickled by her reaction.

She tugged open the door and found herself staring at N, Hyuk and Ken who were waiting by the little lift opposite. They were watching her, as if waiting for her grand entrance. She quickly stepped out and closed the door tight behind her.

She nodded politely with a grimace for a smile, moving to take the stairs. The lift arrived, and N beckoned for her to get in. She smiled, feeling harrassed by all the politeness, shaking her head and speeding up to get to the stairs. Ken stepped out and grabbed her hands, lifting the bags out of them so that he could carry them for her. He told N and Hyuk to get in and that he would walk her up since his flat was on her floor too. They waved and went in.

Filled with dread, she walked up the stairs, knowing that Ken would have a glorious view of her jeans-clad backside as she walked up. She wished she had worn her sweatpants, or her old overalls. Better still, she wished she had put on her jacket before leaving the apartment, but she was in such haste to leave her dad...

She heard Ken follow, keeping up easily with the pace she set as she tried to get up the stairs as quickly as possible. He was probably going slowly, three or four steps at a time with those long lanky legs- AAAGH she had to stop thinking about details like that.

She stopped at the first floor and tried to take back her bags. After all, she couldn't really expect guests to carry her stuff up for her, right?

Ken stopped too, barely out of breath, and looked down at her amusedly as he shook his head. He was making it clear he liked the view. She looked up at him, disturbed that he was standing so close. She had always thought he looked like a person who needed glasses, which she knew he did. Although he didn't wear them anymore except for fashion, he had never lost that expression that people with poor eyesight had. It was a look like they were really concentrating, trying to focus, looking deeply into your eyes, so they could see you better.

And now in that tiny little moment when they stopped, he was looking down at her as if she was the loveliest thing he had ever seen, and he was smiling that eye smile, and not letting go of her bags. Why did he have to stand so close? People didn't normally do that. She wondered if there was any truth in what her dad had said. That maybe Ken was laying on the charm because he was used to doing it.

Or... he truly was interested in her - a thought which scared the shit out of her.

She could feel herself holding her breath, so she stepped back and breathed deep. Smiling awkwardly, she turned and continued up the stairs.

Although the other two were in the lift, she and Ken were keeping pace, and they could see the light illuminating the interior of the cab as she passed it on the way up. She wanted to run the rest of the way up, because this genteel walking up in silence while Ken from Vixx stared at her ass was really uncomfortable for her.

As if he had read her thoughts, Ken suddenly sped up. She heard him approaching fast and looked back in alarm. He had a mischievous look in his eyes, and he was biting his lower lip as he tried to push past her.

Naturally, Siana's competitive side flared up and she sidestepped him and athletically took the stairs three at a time. She had the advantage of having her hands free, so she pulled on the banisters to help gain momentum. She giggled maniacally as he protested loudly in Korean, but he was keeping up rather well. At the last bend, she sprinted up in a runner's stance, using all her thigh and butt muscles to bounce up the stairs gracefully.

Happy to win, she turned with a pleased smile on her face, to see Ken's naughty expression had turned into something more... predatory.

For a split moment she saw he was watching how she moved, but he instantly schooled his expression back to mischievous and brought his gaze back up to hers. He stepped up to the landing and went to stand by her door.

The space echoed with the last of her silly giggles, and was now filled with the sound of her catching her breath. She felt a bit ridiculous, like she had allowed herself to be tricked into doing something she didn't need to. She gestured to take her bags again, but he insisted on holding them till she opened her door. As she turned the key, she supposed he would be taking them in for her, which seemed gentlemanly, but right now felt pushy. She sure as hell didn't want Ken walking into her apartment. It was enough that he was staying next door.

Her breath was still heavy as she reached forward and took the bags as politely as she could from him. She guessed he would let go since it would be really strange for him to fight her for them. He gave them up, bowing his head quickly and turning to his own door. She went into her apartment and shut the door quickly, resisting the urge to look back at him.

**

Ken went in to his apartment, leaving the door open. They had come back briefly to get cameras, wash up after breakfast and pack anything for the drive they had decided to take with Kkomae and Ravi. Leo and Hongbin had gone for a walk or something and could not be found. Plenty of time to find them later for dinner.

It was fortuitous that they had bumped into Siana, because like any girl he came across, Siana was a babe.

When she had looked back up at him with those almond eyes, he was sure she was aware of the effect she was having on him. Ken stopped. He meant to say, the effect he was having on her. Because that was what he did, have an effect on others, making them feel adored.

Ken smiled happily. He felt his purpose in life was to show people he met how truly loveable they were. All human beings were loveable and deserved love and he was there to manifest that purpose with every step he took, he told himself. It helped that Siana was adorable, and like any girl he came across, adored him right back at first sight.

What can I do? he thought to himself. My Eomma gave me my charms, and such a gift should not be wasted.

He laughed aloud.

"Ah, Jaehwannie you're full of it. But I still love you." He said to himself in the mirror as he grabbed his stuff and made sure he had the key.

She seemed a little skittish just now as she came out of her father's apartment. He knew he was laying it on thick insisting on following her up the stairs, but the three of them couldn't fit in the lift and he was going to the same floor as her anyway. She seemed tense and went up the stairs stiff as a robot. He had kept a modest distance for a while but then he felt he needed to loosen up the atmosphere with a little horseplay. That was when he tried racing up the stairs with her.

He was surprised how quickly she reacted to his attempt to move past her and how competitive she was, wanting to win at all costs. It reminded him of someone, or something.

She bounded up those stairs like a gazelle, and he couldn't help but notice her fine form and figure. She was athletic and graceful, and from what N and Hyuk had described earlier on the walk back to the house, was a charismatic dancer who wasn't afraid to express the more carnal side of her dancing.

He had a momentary lascivious thought as he watched her run up the stairs, but he quickly pushed it from his mind when she turned triumphantly at the top to wait for him to catch up. Her breathless smile was charming, and it made his own breath catch. 

What would it be like to have her in his arms?

He had a sudden thought that, despite the fact that it was he who was putting out all the signals, Siana was doing all the actual charming. Of him.

This feeling of it caught him unawares, which didn't happen often, but he supposed that their current circumstances were unusual. They didn't expect to spend long periods of time with people other than their work colleagues, let alone pretty part-Koreans living in the same house in a remote part of Greece, of all places. He was well aware that the circumstances probably enhanced the feelings of attraction he was having towards her.

He was sure she had no idea what effect she was having on him, as she seemed to be too surprised by their presence and a little on edge. He was more surprised at himself, because he usually didn't get too caught up in feminine wiles. He liked to keep things simple and cute and friendly when he interacted with fans, with only a tiny hint of sexual tension.

However in this case, he didn't have the barrier of distance. Proximity to Siana made his smile seductive, his eyes knowing. And, he thought, she was responding to him. It felt nice not to have to pull back as he normally would.

Ken pulled the door shut and ran all the way down to the lobby. He reached the main door and opened it to see the mini bus warming up in front. He saw Kkomae and Min

Seok sititng in the front, but N and Hyuk had not yet appeared. He climbed in.

Kkomae acknowledged him and leaned back in his chair, cleaning his sunglasses.

"Kkomae-ssi, where are we going?" Kkomae was their nickname for the little guy.

"We're just taking a drive to see what's happening. We'll stop somewhere for lunch and then come back, nothing much."

"Did you guys find Leo and Hongbin?"

"No, but Ravi decided to wait near the markets in case they turn up. We will pick him up on the way."

"What if they don't turn up? Will they be alright?"

"Yes, they're big boys now, they can handle themselves. If they need any help they can run to ask Mr Mikhalis or Siana. Speaking of which," Kkomae turned around in his seat and looked Ken square in the eye, "I would like to remind you that we are here on a working holiday and fraternising with the locals is not advisable. In fact, it is discouraged."

Ken dropped his mouth open in mock shock.

"And you're telling me this why?"

"I saw your tongue hanging out in the studio this morning. That's our landlord's daughter, remember your manners and remember who you are."

Ken scowled like a cute child and sat back in his chair. 

There it was, the ever-present reminder to pull back.

Min Seok looked out towards the main door, seeing N and Hyuk come out. They piled into the car and Min Seok started driving. Ken waited for their chatter to die down and then looked expectantly to Kkomae, then N and Hyuk, waiting for Kkomae to lecture them as well. N and Hyuk noticed, and were curious.

"What?" Hyuk asked.

Ken exploded in mock fury. He turned to Kkomae.

"Why did you give me a warning and not them? Shouldn't they be reminded too?!"

Kkomae ignored him. Min Seok laughed.

"What is it?" asked N.

"Kkomae warned me not to get too friendly-"

"Oooh," interrupted N knowingly, "with Siana. Yes, you must be careful, Ken."

"ME? You guys were sticking to her like glue-"

"But we didn't do all that eye stuff."

"Or the smelling good stuff."

"Or the carrying her bags up three flights of stairs stuff."

Ken paused, then shrugged.

"Oh, you noticed all that."

"Oh, yes we did." Said Hyuk, putting his feet up on the ledge that ran behind the front driver's seat.

"Well, I didn't say she smelled delicious," Ken countered. Hyuk burst into laughter and turned on N with Ken.

"Yes, N-hyung, that was so cheesy!"

N kept his head high.

"It was the truth and the point of it was that she could feel comfortable with all you lechers waiting to pounce. Except for you Hyukkie, you were very well-mannered. And Hongbin. And I suppose Ravi and Leo weren't crowding around her. That means you were the only lecher there, Ken-ssi."

Laughing, Hyuk interjected.

"This is N-hyung's secret. He makes the girls comfortable. He lulls the them into thinking they are best friends, then suddeny they find they can't do without him. suddenly they're in love."

"No, that's not true, although it is true that I am very good at making people feel comfortable."

Hyuk and Ken chuckled as Kkomae groaned in the front seat.

"Will you guys shut up, it's giving me gas listening to all that." he grumbled. "The point is, we will be spending time together because we have asked her to arrange some activities for us. But don't encourage anything more than that, you hear me," Kkomae looked back at Ken pointedly, "Lee. Jae. Hwan?"

Ken nodded, feeling a little put out. Was he that readable? Was it that obvious? He thought he was being his usual self. Maybe they were ribbing him, but it irked him all the same.

For someone who liked to make others feel happy, he often felt a little drained by his own trait, and would sometimes need to vent from the frustration of always feeling like he had to be "on" and cheerful and cute. This was one of the times when he wasn't sure if he was joining in the fun with everyone, or if he was being made fun of without him knowing it, or worse, if the gentle scolding was really a warning.

He looked out the window, sulking. He was being singled out, but all of them were happy to find Siana was going to be in their circle for a while. N and Hyuk were especially pleased because they had gotten to see her dancing. It made Ken jealous that he didn't catch a glimpse of her dancing, and he wasn't certain he would ever get to see her performing. Her mortified reaction this morning told him that she was going to be a little more careful about practising where she could be seen.

He suddenly realised who Siana reminded him of when she got all competitive running up the stairs. She reminded him of Leo.

He was reminded of the way they met her, and how Leo had led them through the stairway down to the little basement dance space. He suddenly wondered how Leo had found the stairs, since they hadn't even noticed the doorway was open. Ken realised that Leo could possibly have found it open, and been down the stairs and seen more than he was letting on.

Ken shook his head. 

Sly Leo-hyung. Not admitting to something that he shouldn't have done. And here he was, getting the brunt of Kkomaeie's distrust.

Ken wondered what Leo thought of Siana, especially if he had seen her dancing the way N and Hyuk described her. He noticed that Leo had acted especially reserved towards her, which made him think that it was likely.

One thing about Leo-hyung that Ken loved so much, was his inability to properly hide his thoughts. He was completely guileless. When he was lost for words, he was lost for words. He couldn't talk his way out of a situation even if he tried. So he always did one of two things: take the direct option, or employ any of his avoidance techniques, like distraction, hesitation, confusion or pure obstinate denial. 

Since Leo didn't like confrontation unless it was within the constraints of a game, he would always take option number two and its myriad flavours.

Ken loved that because it showed a purity in Leo's spirit that matched his own desire to make people happy. In fact, all of them in one way or another, had some sort of innocence about them that came from living in a weirdly sheltered, yet over-exposed world.

They were like rock stars who still found a thrill in playing little games with each other. He hoped they would never lose that affection for simple pleasures, that they would never become bored with each others' company or find themselves cynical about their lives.

He would prefer they fought and hated each other for a while than to stop caring for each other.

Ken felt the only thing missing was true intimacy with someone they could devote themselves to as individuals. But he knew Kkomae was right, and not only for security or privacy reasons.

They all had a perfect balance right now that would be affected if one or more of them were to begin thinking about the welfare of a third person that wasn't a part of their group, let alone a part of their world.

They were now riding high and needed to maintain a certain momentum, which they could make last for a long time if they wanted it to.

Their fans were still passionate, and changing the status quo could affect how fans relate to them. Still, there were many idols who made their relationships public and survived the inevitable backlash. And also many others who didn't make it through.

Ken shook his head. He didn't want to think too much about it all. He should clear his head and forget about chasing after Siana up the stairs and looking down at her and standing too close and wondering whether her body would go soft in his embrace...

Ken sighed. How does one stop thinking about something like that?

The bus slowed and approached a waiting Ravi by the roadside. The door whooshed open and he climbed in.

"Hello ladies, shall we lunch?" he rumbled, flopping into a seat. He looked around at the threesome, who were all quiet.

"So... what did you guys think of that studio, huh?"

Ken smiled. Of course Ravi would be thinking about the studio and not the pretty girl who owned it. Hyuk smiled too.

"The nice studio with the dance teacher who got mad at you for wanting to have access to it any time?" he said snarkily, sweetly.

Ravi continued, seemingly unaware of what Hyuk was getting at, "We'll be here for almost five weeks, I think I can get a few songs out and maybe we can work out in the studio as well, do some choreography? That's what we are here for isn't it?"

"We're not expected to come up with so much, just a concept and themes. But if you do more than that, it will make people happy back home," answered Kkomae lazily. He was watching the market vendors beginning to pack up their wares. It was almost noon and the sun was now a hot eye in the sky. He spied Leo and Hongbin strolling slowly down the main street and rolled down his window.

"We're going for a drive and then lunch, coming?"

They waved him on, saying they would meet back at the house afterwards. Kkomae closed the window and turned back to Ravi.

"Why aren't you relaxing anyway, we have such a long break. You guys deserve it after this year's work."

"Five weeks of nothing to do? I can't do that," Ravi said, tapping his finger on his knee as he looked out the window.

"Hyung is like a shark. If he stops swimming he'll die," ventured Hyuk. 

Ravi smirked. "I want the respect of my seniors," he said matter-of-factly.

"And world domination," said Hyuk.

"Aww he just wants love," N said sweetly, before turning on Ravi with a death-glare. "You over-compensating workaholic freak!"

Ken chimed in, "Yeah, making us all look bad with your late nights and monthly song releases!"

Even Kkomae chipped in with, "You should be begging me for rest and relaxation, not the other way round!"

Ravi chuckled and pulled out his phone.

"We haven't even finished our conversation and he's checking his mail already," N sighed. 

Ravi wasn't even listening by then.

**

Leo and Hongbin walked along the main row of shops that faced the sea. They passed quaint boutique shops, banks and eateries as they headed for the main jetty which they could see ahead. They crossed the main road which ran along the waterfront and made their way past a small playground until they came to the water's edge, where the jetty began. They were standing on old stone or marble that had been used to build the huge jetty that was as wide as a double-carriage road.

As they walked along the jetty, they saw huge iron moorings every few metres. They were a deep reddish brown and polished smooth by the elements and handling. They looked like huge iron heart-shaped mushrooms which they could stand or sit on.

They looked over the edge to find that the water was already quite deep, which was suitable for smaller vessels to moor right by the dock. However all the larger vessels would probably drop anchor in the bay a few hundred metres out where it was deeper. They saw a fish trawler coming close to the jetty as it passed by, a small flock of seagulls trailing behind it.

They walked to the very end of the jetty where they saw a permanent lighting fixture, like a maypole of string lights, which had been bolted to the ground. It was conical, the shape of a christmas tree. Since it was permanent, it probably played more functions than just as a christmas ornament. Beyond it, there was a lighthouse, small and squat, just tall enough to make it one story above ground.

And next to it, a lone bench which looked out into the quiet, still waters of the bay.

Hongbin was making audible noises of awe, whilst Leo walked straight to the bench and sat down. He took in the beautiful vista in front of him. Right below his feet, the deep dark green waters of the bay silently lapped against the stone. Straight ahead, the glassy waters reflected the sun with such a glare that the glint hurt his eyes. And if he looked to the horizon, the surprisingly clear view of the Pelopponesian mountain range was in the distance.

Really a huge island, the Pelopponese formed the southern border of the Corinth Canal, whilst the mainland where Itea was situated, formed the northern perimeter. In between, the waters of the Corinth were so beautiful and still they were like a glass mirror, or a metal sheet, that reflected the sky's moods with reverence.

Except for the chugging of the passing trawler, it was quiet and peaceful. They couldn't even hear the bustle of the street. Leo pulled out his phone to take pictures, hoping to send some back to his family when he reconnected to wifi. He took video clips and selfies with Hongbin, before they both settled into a comfortable silence, sitting on the bench together.

"Hyung, they really found a great place for us to have our vacation," Hongbin started.

Leo nodded thoughtfully while Hongbin studied his reaction.

"And our hosts are very nice." Another thoughtful nod.

"Mr Mikhalis is very accommodating. And Siana is very charming."

Leo looked at Hongbin pointedly. Hongbin took it as a sign to keep going.

"She was so friendly and helpful."

"She was avoiding me," Leo said.

"Hyung, you were wearing your scary face and barely said hello, of course she would keep her distance." Leo nodded reluctantly. Hongbin didn't know about their lift encounter, though.

"What do you think of her?" Hongbin ventured.

"Why are you asking me?" Leo asked, almost too quickly.

"We will be spending a lot of time together, which is a lot to expect from someone who is obviously a fan. I mean, can we trust her to act appropriately?"

Leo thought about Hongbin's question carefully, wanting to give it proper attention. Finally, he looked back at Hongbin.

"I don't know her enough to say."

"That's true. But what does your gut feeling say?"

Leo thought about it again. He sometimes felt a little disassociated from his feelings, or perhaps too wrapped up in them to think about them as thoughts. He had trouble expressing what he felt with words. Or perhaps he was just second-guessing himself. Then he remembered N's words, to just trust himself.

That brought him his answer.

"I would like to trust in her. But I still don't know her enough to do so." It was exactly how he felt, and he was okay with it being just that.

Hongbin was surprised to hear Leo say even that much.

"She seems trustworthy. She is certainly industrious. Teaching at such a young age. And helping her father with his business. Dealing with guests can be tiresome."

"And she is talented." Leo interjected.

"Oh?" Hongbin waited expectantly for Leo to continue. Leo smiled a sheepish smile.

"Oooh, Leo-hyung, you were spying on her too?"

"Yes. By accident."

"Did you accidentally watch every part of her rehearsal before you realised what you had done? And then accidentally did not reveal yourself when the others did?"

Leo laughed and leaned back on the bench to look up at the sky. Hongbin thought carefully about how he phrased his words.

"I see. By the look on your face I can tell she put on a good show."

Leo sat up and shook his head.

"No, it wasn't a show. It wasn't like that. She was so serious, trying to get it just right. She can do ballet, hip hop, ethnic-" Leo stopped for a moment. "Anyway, she is a perfectionist. Like you said, hard-working."

"Admirable qualities for a girl that age to have."

"No different from all the kids back home who go into training young," Leo murmured absently.

"But she is from a different world. There is no payoff like ours."

"If you mean celebrity and fame, then that is true. But in both worlds, hard work can bring satisfaction, purpose, money, security... It's not that different."

Hongbin realised that there was some truth in Leo's words. He wondered what it was about Siana that had piqued his interest, seeing as there were tonnes of girls just like her back home.

"But she is different, isn't she hyung?"

Leo answered almost nonchalantly, "Of course. She is half-Greek and will be our host for a few weeks. We don't know many people like that, do we?"

Hongbin could tell a deflection when he saw it. Either Leo was missing the point of his question, or trying to make it seem so. He let it go, not wanting to agitate Leo unnecessarily.

But then Leo continued.

"Maybe the difference is her attitude. She isn't in it for the fame or celebrity. So she doesn't have to risk much. She doesn't have the desperation some of us have when we start out, in our world. We didn't know if we would succeed. Knowing we have done well makes us confident. But for others, the competition can be hard."

"So, that is what makes her different for you, hyung? That she can walk away from that world?"

Leo looked at Hongbin.

"Yes. She doesn't need people like us." Leo looked out to sea, letting out a sigh and squinting his eyes with a frown.

Hongbin saw the truth of the matter immediately.

Leo saw Siana as someone who would want him for who he was, not what his fame could bring.

Hongbin wondered why the normally staid, steadfast Leo would even entertain such thoughts, especially with the finite amount of time they had here. Surely Leo could see that going for such depth in a relationship would end in heartache, since there was no possibility of pursuing it till the end? He wondered if he should trust in Leo's good intentions, and whether he could treat Siana right, knowing that their options were few.

He realised that there was another possibility: that Leo-hyung was deeper into this than he knew himself.

Hongbin sat back with a quiet whistle. He looked up at the sky for a moment, then glanced back at Leo.

The man looked like he was in pain.

 

**

 

Siana opened the door to the the shop and went in. Today she would organise the stuff her mother had sent and make as many deliveries as she could.

The items were mostly personal orders made to her mum from people who knew her here. They were housewives on a budget who wanted cheap crafting supplies but couldn't use the internet for lack of access or knowledge. Her mum bought the items for them because she wanted to help them, not really for a profit. She had already sent by post a large box of knitting wools and needles, just enough to stock a small shelf in their shop, but little enough not to garner any attention from customs. That package would arrive soon, and Siana would be letting the ladies know to come see. Her dad considered it to be akin to a garage sale, and in any case, they were doing a lot of the ladies a favour.

Jenny had packed the four or five individual orders separately, and Siana loaded these into a large tote bag that would fit on the back of her bike. The rest of the stuff were plastic and fake leather bag handles, jewellery-making tools, wires and an assortment of colourful beads, glue sticks for glue guns, and packets of embroidery needles and sewing machine needles of unusual sizes.

Siana took these out to the front where a lone bookshelf stood in the empty space. The shop space was located too close to the main road to have it make sense. The only view was the row of apartments opposite. There were bakeries and sundry shops nearby, so it made no sense to have something with a large front like it did. There weren't enough pedestrians wanting to shop to walk past it, and it didn't have a view or pretty atmosphere to be a cafe. It used to be a hair salon, but that closed years ago.

She really didn't even have to put the stuff in here because they took up so little space, but she didn't want to have people come upstairs to her place for them either. She put the items out neatly and grabbed the tote bag, slinging it over her shoulder. Because it was warmer now, she had left her jacket at home, going out in just her tee and a skinny sweater. She felt that it would probably get even warmer and if there was no chill wind, she could walk around in a single layer.

She locked up and went out to get the bike. She tied the tote bag to the small rack affixed to the back wheel which also acted as the pillion rider's painful seat. She got on the bike and pedalled out towards the centre of town.

By now the vendors had completely cleared the market place and the streets were empty save for a few pedestrians. She rode towards the main church, where smaller roads led to some of the customers. She rang doorbells and was let in with a buzz. She dropped off the packages one by one, greeting people she had last seen the year before.

Most had stews bubbling on the stove, or were cleaning vegetables. She smelled olive oil, garlic and wild thyme, and would be offered a taste or a coffee or sweet. She only stayed long enough to be polite and begged off with the excuse that she had more deliveries to make. Some of them passed her foodstuffs and personal items to ferry to the next person, since she was on the way anyway.

Siana left each house feeling more and more satisfied that she was being of help. Some of the ladies had grown children who had left the home, and rare visits by strangers were always welcome. Others were stressed by the racket their kids were making, and enjoyed a few minutes of peace while Siana played with their kids in the hallway.

She reminded all of them that she was teaching at the studio again and managed to come up with a tentative schedule that accommodated the ladies' routines.

Finally, Siana was done, and she got on the bike to take the long way home. She had ended up across the other side of town, so she decided to ride along the waterfront from the marina where she was at, past the main jetty, and onwards beyond Miami to her house.

By now most of the town was settling into that peaceful quiet afternoon siesta time. Many shops and businesses still closed after lunch until late afternoon, which seemed to her to accommodate a people who enjoyed their late nights socialising, but loved being early risers. A lack of sleep coupled with the food coma that came after lunch, made an afternoon nap the order of the day.

Some of the older periptera, the tiny shacks stationed at almost every corner which sold cigarettes, candies, newspapers and ice creams, would shut for the afternoon too, although some of the newer, younger owners catered to the rare tourist or local who liked to wander the town in the quiet.

She pedalled at a steady pace, letting the soft breeze lift her hair off her face, and feeling it press her sweater against her body. At the main jetty she stopped at the periptero that was open and peered into the small window behind which a young woman was sitting listening to a radio. She bought chikhla, the local chewing gum made from the gummy sap of a tree, just because she wanted to taste that bittery, powdery slightly sweet but bland taste. She didn't enjoy it much because it became hard too soon, but it was an old familiar taste she wanted to revisit.

She pushed off again, wanting to pedal out onto the jetty.

As she turned the corner, she rode straight into the path of Hongbin and Leo who were walking from the jetty to the main road.

She braked and hopped off her seat at the last moment to stop herself from riding through them. She felt rather than saw Hongbin's arm catch her around the waist. At the same time her eyes locked with Leo, who was directly in the path of the bike. He stopped the bike bodily, using his long arms to grab the handlebar and putting the force of his weight against the bike.

Hongbin grabbed her arm with his other hand to keep her from going off balance. Siana gasped as she and Leo came face to face. She stepped back. He looked so pissed.

"Are you alright?" Hongbin asked.

"Are you alright?" She asked Leo, who looked as if she had actually run him over. "I'm sorry! Are you hurt?"

Leo's frown turned to Hongbin, who had one hand around her waist, and another on her arm as he pulled her upright. Hongbin looked back at Leo, a momentary frown on his face too. He raised his chin as if to say, "Answer the lady!"

Leo glared at him, then turned to Siana to say he was fine. Hongbin rolled his eyes. Leo spoke as if he wanted to strangle her. Hongbin peered closely at her.

"Are you okay? You almost fell."

Siana seemed to register he was talking to her, and realised he was holding her upright. She nodded, pulling away.

"Thank you. I'm sorry, I didn't see you."

"It's alright, we are fine. Right, hyung?" Hongbin stepped to Leo's side, nudging him surreptitiously. Leo nodded absently as he grabbed and squeezed Hongbin's arm from behind, hidden from Siana. For a moment they stood in awkward silence. Siana looked out to the lighthouse at the end of the jetty.

"Did you see the lighthouse?" They nodded politely.

"It's very pretty here," smiled Hongbin. He felt like he could smack Leo right now for being so absurdly quiet. Unfortunately, his arm was locked in position by Leo.

A thought occurred to him.

"Ah, Miss Siana, Leo wants to try the Greek coffee at home. Where can we get some? Can you show us how to make it?"

Hongbin felt a sharp pain in his arm as Leo slowly tightened his death grip on him. Siana responded to his warm eyes and voice with a smile of her own.

"I can show you," she said. Then in excitement she remembered something. Her eyes lit up as she spoke happily to Hongbin.

"Shall we go get some now?" She turned her smiling eyes to Leo, thinking he was going to love what she had in mind.

His eyes, seeming so disdainful, held hers as she willed herself to keep smiling. She wasn't going to let Hongbin's warm politeness seep away under Leo's frown.

Against her better judgment, she looked down at his lips, which had a hard set to them. He seemed so cold all of a sudden. Where was the gentle giant that stood at her back in the lift as they laughed at themselves? He had been so close, she had felt the warmth of his breath on her skin.

Siana felt a heat rise in her cheeks in an instant, and a tiny breath escaped her lips. She looked back up at Leo to find him still staring at her. She smiled quickly, nervously, breaking their gaze and stepping away from her bike to begin walking.

They hadn't even said they wanted to, but she heard them turn to follow her anyway

 

**

 

The boys had an awkward tussle as Hongbin tried to lever his arm out of Leo's grip.

Hongbin finally broke away and hurried to walk next to Siana, while Leo hung back a little.

In his mind, Leo kept playing back that moment when Siana looked at his lips, turned red, then gasp as she looked up at him with an expression full of... he couldn't name it, but whatever it was, it stirred something inside of him.

Which didn't matter in the end, because she was obviously scared by him and couldn't wait to get away from him.

Leo wished he hadn't reacted so stiffly, causing that strange tension in the air. He knew Hongbin had gallantly helped Siana keep on her feet, but he felt more than a little disturbed seeing his friend's hands on Siana.

He had wanted to shout at him to get them off.

And then she had caught his angry expression and there wasn't much he could do without revealing the source of his discomfort. He couldn't very well tell Hongbin to get his hands off her.

He felt Hongbin was trying to make something happen, which he didn't like. He felt forced into the situation, and he wasn't ready. Plus, he had unthinkingly given Siana the impression he was angry, when truly he was concerned for her. And then unhappily irritated by Hongbin's unwelcome attentions.

He walked behind them sullenly. He felt like an ass, unable to lighten the mood and having to depend on Hongbin's easy grace to smooth things over. He watched as Siana slowly relaxed under Hongbin's cheerfulness. Leo felt jealous. He wanted to be the one who could do that. He knew he was his own source of anguish at that moment. He just had to let go, but didn't know how.

He thought of N's words, to trust himself.

He felt he could see a little more of what he had meant by that. He was too caught up in what she might think of him that he didn't realise she might like his concern. But somehow, by instinct, his walls went up before he knew it, and he kept them up with his self-doubts and second-guessing.

He decided he wanted to be free of that. After all, it wasn't as if they were going to end up being anything more than acquaintances, maybe even friends, with the little time they had. He had shared a delightful moment of silliness with her that morning, why couldn't he have more of that?

All he had to do was let go.

He slowly caught up, walking on the other side of her, listening to her pointing out things to notice to Hongbin. She hadn't realised he was by her side. Hongbin did of course, and he began finding interest in the shop windows as they were passing. In the lull of the conversation, Leo took the opportunity to ask Siana quietly, if she was alright.

She turned, her bright eyes looking up at him. She nodded, smiling. Then she looked ahead and pointed, saying they had arrived. He began to smell the aroma of roasting coffee.

She slowed to park her bike, and he watched as she expertly used the pedal to prop the bike against the kerb so that it stood upright with its tyres in the gutter. He liked the trick, and liked it even more that she did it smoothly. It signalled a certain repetitive part of her life which spoke of who she was: someone who loved to get about in her community on two wheels. It was these sorts of small gestures and actions which created what people felt was home to them. It made him think of days out on the bike in a friendly neighbourhood. She turned to him and spoke excitedly.

"I think you will really like this."

She went to the door of the tiny shop and pushed it to go in. He heard Hongbin's excited gasp just as he looked into the clear glass window front of the shop and saw a gigantic copper roasting machine.

"Hyung, look at that!" Hongbin looked into the window, watching the machine, essentially a boiler with a roasting pan and spinning arm to turn the beans attached to it. It was that rich, rosy, rusty coloured metal, taller than he was and taking up the better part of the shop. It looked like a giant cake mixer, except it had a woodfire burning in its base under the huge tray in which coffee beans were being stirred by a giant metal arm that tilled the beans in a never-ending loop. It looked amazing and the smell from outside was divine.

Siana was inside, holding open the door. She beckoned to Leo with a widening smile. He stepped into the shop.

And into an acrid, sour-smelling atmosphere that completely took the romance out of the moment.

He looked at Siana, who was biting her lip trying not to laugh. He held a hand up to his nose and and squeezed his eyes shut, coughing. She giggled and motioned for Hongbin to come in too. Hongbin had seen Leo's reaction, so he put a tentative foot inside the door, only to be pulled in bodily by Leo.

If he was going to suffer, Hongbin would too.

After a moment, he took his hand away and sniffed the air. Although it was still acrid in the air, his nose was getting used to the almost vinegary-flavour of the roasting coffee. It began to feel richer and warmer in his nose, rather than sour and thin as was the first impression.

The beans were laid out at the back to cool and then were ground and packaged daily for sale.

The old lady tending to the machine looked up from her tiny seat behind a high makeshift counter. Siana wondered how much the old copper machine would have cost and how old it was. For all she knew it was there during the war and had been servicing the local coffeeholics for almost a century. Their operation was small but certainly in demand, since they sold all their coffee daily.

"Yeiasou, Kyria Despina," Siana said, calling the lady Mrs Despina. She chatted in Greek to her briefly, then asked for a small packet for the boys. The old lady looked up at them appreciatively as she put a packet onto the counter. Siana realised it was still warm and she lifted it to her nose to inhale deeply before holding it up to Leo for him to smell.

He took it from her and held it up to his nose. She almost laughed when his eyes closed as if he had been given a drug.

What was it about coffee?

The old lady chuckled and called him mignon, a french term for cute - like, whole package, super gorgeous cute. She looked at Siana with a naughty glint in her eye and told her to be careful. She stood up to get a closer look. She certainly wasn't shy, and let the pleasure and appreciation on her face show.

Siana laughed, saying, "No, they're guests of my father's, they're not friends of mine."

The old lady shook her head. "Young kids. Don't grow old like me, before you realise you should have taken your chance, my child. If you're all willing and able, you should go for it while you can."

Siana's eyes widened and she gasped in surprise. This was hardly what she expected from Kyria Despina! The old lady went back to looking Leo up and down, then turning to watch Hongbin as Leo passed the coffee to him to smell.

"This one is very nice. Look at him, he's every mother's dream," she rasped happily. Hongbin smiled warmly at her and came closer to bow politely. The old lady put a hand up to his cheek with a mother's touch, before turning his face towards Siana and looking at her with a smirk.

"Who wouldn't want this?" She let him go and use the hand to waggle a finger at Siana. "Don't waste your time, child, you're in your prime and need to think about your future."

Siana giggled at the old lady. Leo and Hongbin looked at each other, bemused but still smiling politely.

The lady went to sit back down, her joints making her movements stiff. Hongbin went to help her, easing her into her chair. She patted his arm sweetly.

"Tell this one to come visit any time. Your man, I won't touch."

"Kyria Despina! What are you saying, for shame!" Siana gasped again. She sounded more like an old lady than Kyria Despina did.

Kyria Despina fixed her with an old lady stare which said, don't mess with me, I know what I am talking about.

"Men are like puppies. You need to give them reasons to protect you and love you. You can make them chase their own tails for you if you want. They just need to know what's on your mind. Don't play games with them like those cats who call themselves girls out there. Mad dogs are dangerous."

The old lady thought for a moment. "Unless that's what they want too. In which case, you better be ready for the consequences."

She looked up at Leo, whose poker face had settled on his features again.

"This one doesn't know it, but he's playing more games than you ever could. He's in a world of his own." She turned to look at Siana with glee, cackling as she said,

"I pity the girl who catches his heart, and doesn't know how to unravel it."

Hongbin was watching Siana closely, intrigued by the suddenly loaded tension between her and the old lady. He saw Siana's eyes flick over to Leo, who had turned to look at the coffee machine as it rolled the coffee beans over and over with a sound like waves breaking on the shore. She seemed to calm herself and turned back to the old lady with a laugh.

"Kyria Despina, are you telling fortunes now?" She said in Greek.

The old lady smiled and nodded, reaching up to pat Siana's hand.

"Ana mou, you're a good girl. I am just saying you are in charge. You must always be."

Siana smiled and nodded.

She understood the old lady, but deep down she wondered, how could she be in charge, when she barely knew how to control her own feelings?

 

**

 

They left the shop and Siana walked with them the rest of the way home.

It was very quiet now, and they walked at a gentle silent pace as they approached their building. Siana asked them if she should show them how to do the coffee now, or would they prefer to rest?

"Rest?" said Hongbin. He looked at Leo and they chortled together. Siana smiled. They mustn't be used to anything but a hectic pace. They insisted she get in the lift and both of them took the stairs. She got out at the top just before they arrived, and used her key to open their penthouse. She stood by the door, waiting for them to go in first, as it was their place now. They all paused to take off their shoes. She saw Hongbin go into the far right room and Leo into the master on the left.

She realised that he was staying directly above her, and it was probably him who had said hello the night before. Then she realised, more likely he was the one she had noticed above her father and her, who had stayed in the shadows. She turned to go to the kitchen.

She loved this penthouse. Unlike many older homes in Greece, it was airy and bright and had lots of open space. She saw that whilst it was all very neat, there was a rumble of bedding on the sofa where someone had spent the night.

In the kitchen, she saw the beautiful vista of the mountain range and the white-capped mountain of Parnassos. She slid open one of the kitchen windows to let in some of the breeze.

She heard the boys come round into the kitchen as she reached up to a shelf to get what looked like an ornamental pot with a handle. It was a briki, a coffee pot in which to make greek coffee, the size of a coffee mug, only with a long handle to hold it over a fire.

She fished around for a long-handled teaspoon in the drawer, then looked around for the small camping-sized gas cooker, which seemed to be a must for all greek kitchens to make their coffees with.

She saw it stacked up high on a shelf and went over to get it. Leo, who was standing nearby, reached over to get it for her, but before he could reach it, she had sprung up and neatly plucked it from the shelf, using her hand on the counter for extra leverage. She smiled up at him before turning to set it up on the counter by the kitchen sink.

Hongbin let out a sigh. "Ah, hyung, what use is all that height of yours? You need to be faster than that."

Leo smiled over Siana's head at Hongbin. He answered in that quiet voice of his, "She's like those little players that take you by surprise on the courts."

Siana listened to them chatting, pleased they were feeling at ease, which in turn made her feel at ease. She unwrapped the packet of coffee and found an airtight jar to pour it into.

"That reminds me, I found someone to play basketball with, hyung. I'm meeting them in a couple of hours, if you want to join me."

Siana's ears perked up at that. She looked up at Hongbin, interested.

"Do you mean Panos?"

"How did you know?"

"No one else would give up their siesta for basketball. It has to be Panos."

Leo listened intently to Hongbin and Siana chatting, as he kept his eyes on her moving hands. Was this the guy he had seen her with this morning and on the courts the night before? He remembered his arm around her waist, holding her tight in what he felt was an intimate embrace. It must be her boyfriend, he thought, which made him feel a little despondent.

Hongbin nodded.

"Yes, he was very friendly."

"Oh yes, he is. He helps us a lot with our guests, actually. His father owns a hotel by the beach, not far from here."

Not only handsome but rich too, Leo thought. He watched Siana's hands as she opened the tap to fill the strange little utensil she was holding.

"What is that?" he interrupted sullenly.

Siana and Hongbin looked at him. Siana suddenly remembered she was there to show them how to make the coffee, and here she was absently making it without instruction while she chatted to Hongbin.

"It's a briki. You can use any pot that is shaped like this. It has to be this shape, tallish and not too wide, because there is a trick to the boiling fo the coffee to get the krema on top. A good Greek coffee, just like a good espresso, should have a nice thick krema on top," she said, referring to the thick layer of foamy bubbles that lay on top of a well-made black coffee.

"So, you put enough water in for each person's little cup, then a very heaped teaspoon of coffee grounds, and sugar if you want sugar. Do you want sugar?"

Leo shook his head, Hongbin nodded. Hongbin looked at Leo with a thoughtful expression on his face.

"Well, I will put in a tiny bit of sugar, since the coffee is more bitter than anyone is used to. If you are in a cafe, you would say you want the coffee metrio, which means, moderately sweet." She put in a half-teaspoon of sugar, and then deftly stirred the water and coffee concoction. Like cocoa, the coffee took a while to absorb into the water, but she did not stir enough to completely dissolve it.

"See? You want it to be wet, but not completely mixed in. This helps create a better krema."

She lit up the camper gas stove with a lighter and put it on high, then placed the briki on top, taking out the teaspoon.

"Now we wait, but you must stay with the coffee. Do not leave the coffee at this stage!"

They peered into the briki and its contents, right now an uninspiring cold mess. Hongbin sneaked a sideways glance at Leo. What had put him into this sudden sullen mood? He thought back to what they were talking about. Panos. Basketball. Siana was saying that he was nice and friendly. Hongbin remembered that at the markets Leo had been watching her interaction with Panos with that same sulking look that he had on now. Was he jealous of Panos for some reason?

Then Hongbin realised Leo had no idea that Panos and Siana were cousins. He must think they were close friends, maybe lovers.

Hongbin wondered how long he could let Leo suffer before revealing the truth to him, before it became cruel. He turned his attention back to to the coffee.

"Who taught you how to make coffee like this?" he asked.

"My father." Siana smiled. They could hear the water beginning to simmer. Before Hongbin could continue with more questions, she turned her attention back to it.

"Oh, see how it's about to start bubbling? Under all the layer of coffee floating on top, the water will rise when it boils. This is where timing is everything. You need it to rise and bring the krema up to the lip of the briki. This is why you need a narrow pot like this. In a wide pot it won't rise up. But you also need to take it off the heat before the coffee overflows. It can be very exciting!" She laughed abashedly.

Hongbin looked at Leo, thinking this would be the perfect opportunity for him to say something, make a joke, or exclaim how interesting this all was - which Hongbin knew it would be. But there Leo stood, quiet and stony-faced. Poor Siana would think he was bored by her conversation. Hongbin felt it was only right that Leo suffer a little more after his poor showing as a gracious guest.

"You must have made this many times to be this confident. For your friends?" he said.

"Not really, we like to go out for our coffees."

"Oh. Do you make coffee for Panos?" Hongbin said pointedly. He saw Leo's hand curl on the counter top and smiled to himself. Ah, this was too easy.

"Yes, all the time, especially when I visit him at home, or at the hotel. They let me into the kitchen there."

"You must be very close," said Hongbin.

"Oh ya, since we were little kids. We're soul mates, I'm sure."

Hongbin watched Leo squirm alone on the other side of Siana. Leo's eyes were fixed on the coffee that was not yet really boiling, yet he looked at it as if he thought it was about to come screaming out of the pot.

"Ah, it's nice to have someone that understands you well, who accepts you for who you are completely."

Siana's tone turned serious.

"Panos has helped me through some tough times. I don't know what I would have done without him."

Leo cleared his throat and shifted his weight, obviously uncomfortable with the topic of discussion.

"Look, it's rising," Siana said, getting ready to turn off the heat.

The krema had formed a little disc in the centre of the pot, while water bubbles roiled around the sides of it. In an instant, the disc rose up the neck of the briki about a centimetre or so, and in a rush Siana had taken it off the fire and turned off the heat.

She poured a drop into each cup first, then filled each cup to the top.

Hongbin and Leo peered into their cups, noting the rich aroma and the thick smooth layer of tiny bubbles on top. She put the briki in the sink and put the cups onto a tray to take them to the low coffee table by the fireplace. Hongbin and Leo followed, each taking a seat. She reminded them not to drink to the bottom, as the very fine coffee grounds would settle there while they were drinking.

She went back to the kitchen to wash up.

"What about your coffee?" Hongbin asked.

"Not for me, I will be going now," she said as she quickly washed up and dried her hands.

"Oh, well, do you play basketball? Maybe you could join us later," Hongbin asked.

"Yes she does," Leo said, just as Siana said, "Yes I do."

Hongbin and Siana looked at Leo as he sipped on his coffee. Hongbin wondered how he would know that.

"Sorry, what did you say?" Siana asked.

Leo looked up, seeing they were both staring, and then realised he had revealed himself.

"Err... "

"He was agreeing you should join us - if that is what you want," covered Hongbin. Siana brightened up.

"I will. Anything with Panos will be fun! See you later, then." She waved as she walked out, grabbing her shoes and pulling shut the door.

Hongbin turned to Leo, who seemed ultra-interested in the coffee he was sipping.

"How do you know Siana likes to play basketball?"

Hongbin smiled widely as he watched Leo trying to come up with an answer to that.

"You must have seen her with a basketball or something, right?" Hongbin suddenly realised where. She was the girl they had all seen on the basketball court as they had entered Itea the night before. The girl whom Panos was hugging as they passed.

Leo nodded, still loving his coffee with his eyes.

Hongbin wondered how far he could go with this thing.

"You know, hyung, Siana seems like a very nice girl. Do you think she would be interested in me? Should I ask her out?"

Hongbin saw Leo's eyes widen momentarily, then his knuckles whitened as he gripped his coffee cup tighter. With a great amount of effort, he sipped the last of his coffee and carefully placed the cup and saucer on the table.

Hongbin pushed a little further.

"She's sweet and gentle, she seems to like me a lot. She was friendly towards me, I can't ignore that. What do you think?"

"I think... you should ask her boyfriend first." Leo said quietly, looking out the window.

 

**

 

Siana made herself a greek salad with the things she bought that morning, and put a couple of soft-boiled eggs into a bowl, topped with soy sauce. It was a mix of tastes which she loved. She ate slowly, watching a greek variety show on the tv. Like any variety show of all the cultures she knew, it was loud, silly, musical, comical and slightly bawdy. Same as the malay and korean shows she liked watching back home.

Her day had been eventful, to say the least, but she felt that she was beginning to feel the calm that descends upon oneself after the shock and panic of this kind of situation have subsided.

Well, maybe she was wrong and actually, the panic was beginning to bubble up.

Vixx was living all around her and she had practically seduced herself in the mirror while N, Hyuk and an as yet unknown person watched.

That person was either Hongbin, Ken or Leo. She thought it was likely Ken, since he had made a beeline towards her and all but winked at her, he had such a knowing look in his eye. Possibly it was Hongbin, whom she felt was discrete and gentlemanly and would not let on if he had seen her, for her sake. It could have been Leo... She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment, forgetting to chew.

It would be different if she were on stage, she thought.

No, it wouldn't. She would still feel highly conscious, because... well, he was Leo... and they were Vixx. It was something she was used to doing onstage, performing with an attitude that was required for the sake of expression. But because she had had such a deep crush on Leo as a distant fan for so long, the idea of a repeat performance knowing he was watching, was scary. It felt like too much of what was private for her was being put on display. She didn't like that feeling of vulnerability. It felt dangerous, like it would spin out of her control.

She cried out a baby cry, shaking her head. She took a deep breath, trying to think of something else. It wasn't good to cry over food. She would think of the positive... like, turning up to her dad's remote hometown to find VIXX WAS LIVING IN HER HOME.

She clanked her fork down and put her head in her hands, feeling a little like she was going to vomit.

She felt her emotions, which she had kept from getting out of control the whole day, begin to spiral up and make her heart race.

She thought of when Leo had walked in the room and barely acknowledged her, then minutes later shared a laugh with her at their silly situation in the lift. He seemed to run hot and cold from one moment to the next. Perhaps he was trying to keep his distance as a habit and felt forced to engage out of politeness when the situation called for it.

She wanted desperately not to fawn over him, or any of them, she hated that kind of thing. But she felt that he could see through her pretences and that he probably knew what kind of thoughts she had had about Vixx in the past, thoughts that would make him embarrassed if she were to announce them. She cringed. Ugh.

"And he would be riiight!" she wailed to the tv. "Because I am a creepy fangirl!"

Thoughts from imagining what music he liked to whether he slept in the nude. Thoughts about whether if she hugged him, her head would fit in the crook of his neck. Thoughts about what he would like to do on a date, during and after. Thoughts about whether his lips would taste as good as they looked, or if they would feel hard or soft on hers. She had had all these thoughts, and more. Or should she say, worse.

She flopped onto the sofa, too embarrassed by herself, too ashamed of her lascivious mind, but at the same time thinking, "My head would so fit into the crook of his neck!" proud that she was tall enough for that.

AND IS THAT SOMETHING TO BE PROUD OF SIANAAAAA?

She kicked the air with both legs.

She was teaching kids dance. Earning money. She had graduated, having started on her vocation early, being way ahead of her peers. She had loving parents and could visit her father freely. Those were things to be proud of!

Siana stood up and collected her food, still half eaten, to take to the kitchenette. She put the salad in the fridge for later and wolfed down the rest of the eggs.

She washed up and went to put on some sweats.

In the mirror, she saw herself, flushed and frowning. Her hair, which she had always thought was shiny and slinky, looked flat. Her eyes, which always seemed to her to be alive and pretty, looked boring and brown. Her straight nose was characterless. Her healthy clear skin, dull and dreary. She thought Leo would think these things if he noticed.

STOP SIANA!

She was unused to looking at herself and thinking whether she looked good enough for someone else. Much as she would love to impress Leo, or any of them, she reminded herself that they were still strangers. Acquaintances, guests. And although she may know more about them than they knew about her, she only knew what was allowed to be known.

She had no rights over them, and neither had they rights over her.

And that meant that, if Leo thought her hair was flat and her skin was dull and her eyes were boring... if he didn't like any of it, well, he could lump it.

She snapped her fingers at herself in the mirror. You go, girl.

Then, like a child about to jump into a giant basket of candy, she locked her door and ran down the stairs to go play basketball.

 

**

 

Leo changed into sports leggings and fleece shorts. He was dragging his feet, not really happy about Hongbin committing them both to their afternoon appointment on the basketball court.

He wondered if Hongbin really was interested in Siana. After all, he had been talking a mile about her on the jetty as they sat under the lighthouse. He acknowledged that Hongbin would have no idea of his own feelings towards her since he had never hinted to anyone that he found her even remotely attractive. As far as anyone knew, he was being his usual, quiet observing self.

Leo thought that Siana and Hongbin would be a good match, since it was obvious that Hongbin's gentle courteousness seemed to bring out her relaxed side. He thought that he had become more like that too, but it was clear from the day's proceedings that he had no idea how to make her feel comfortable around him.

He wondered how almost everyone else had become best buddies suddenly with her, a relative stranger. And how his own sense of ease around other people seemed to have disappeared in her presence. It wasn't as if she treated him differently, although she seemed to be shyer of him more than anyone else. That is probably because of me, he thought, giving off bad vibes or something. He admitted to himself that of them all, he was treating her with the least easiness.

Oh.

He realised why, suddenly. It was the guilt of knowing something no one else did - not her, not even his brothers.

It wasn't just the lying by omission - not admitting that he had accidentally and then purposefully, spied on her. N and Hyuk had already admitted to doing it quite freely. Although they were caught in the act, they could have denied seeing anything at all, which they didn't. There wasn't any shame in that.

The shame was in the fact that he had hidden that fact from everyone, and that it had sparked in him an interest in her that went beyond the casual informality of his members.

It made it hard for him to look at her without feeling like he was revealing his thoughts through his expression. Which was why he avoided making unnecessary eye contact. It made it hard for him to think of her as just their host. He had become hyper aware of her, even thinking of her when she wasn't around. He wondered if she were in her living room just below where he was standing, or whether she was further along in her bedroom, changing.

He stopped, his arms halfway through the sleeves of the hoodie he was about to pull on. The image of her slowly, enticingly bending backwards until he saw the top of her chest and the swell of her breasts under that bulky sweatshirt she was wearing, just as she released her head and allowed it to fall back completely, came into his head in a rush. When she had finally let her head fall back, he had glanced down and locked eyes for an instant with her. In almost the same instant he had stepped back into the shadows, his heart in his throat.

He felt sure she would not have seen his face.

He would hate to find out she knew all along it was him.

He hated being found out. He hated the idea of being caught spying on a girl like a naughty schoolboy peeping in the girls changing room. By the girl herself!

He did not want to admit that he had been enthralled, captivated by her grace, her beauty. Her sensuality.

Not to her, and not to his friends.

Hiding that fact from everyone seemed to make it all worse, and this was what he realised made him behave differently towards her, and consequently, made her a little uncomfortable around him.

Whenever he felt like he could begin to relax, something would happen to put him on edge again.

When she had almost fallen to the ground after falling off her bike, and he had been powerless to help her from his position. All he could do was stop the bike, and watch helplessly as Hongbin did the saving.

When he had realised slowly, over the coffee that she had made so expertly for them, that she felt deeply for that man Panos, who had been there for her through hard times, and that he himself would not have the chance to prove himself in the same way to her for lack of opportunity. All he could do was sit in moody silence, unable to make that leap past the weight of his own disappointment, to lighten up the atmosphere and have her feel at ease.

He slipped the hoody on and bent to lace up his sneakers. He tied them like he was punishing them.

Why all this angst? He asked himself.

It was as if he was punishing himself by wanting something he couldn't have, and actually, didn't know he wanted until he found out he couldn't have it. If someone had asked him two days ago if he wanted it, he would have said no.

Want what? He thought. He shook his head.

He would have said all that mattered to him was work, and the prospect of a good restful break, and the possibility of creating more music. Not girls, not love, and certainly not this strumming tension in his gut.

He thought he ought to have more self-control than that. Perhaps it was just the guilt. Maybe if I come clean, all this unpleasantness will be lifted, he thought.

Yes. He would tell her. Or, maybe he would tell Hongbin first. No, Hongbin was interested in her.

Ken. No, Ken would tell her in an instant, thinking it wasn't a big deal.

N. Yes. He should speak to N.

Leo ruffled his hair in frustration. Maybe he should just shut up and bear it.

He grabbed his jacket and called out to Hongbin that he would meet him downstairs, and ran down the stairs at a jog, feeling like a good round of basketball and sweating would help him get this strange feeling out of his system.

 

**

 

When Hongbin had joined him downstairs, Leo was pacing on the kerb opposite. Hongbin felt a twinge of guilt. He could easily assuage some of Leo's unspoken concerns by mentioning casually that Panos was Siana's cousin whose relationship was of a platonic nature.

But Hongbin had a pragmatist's approach to life and felt that people learned through experience rather than advice. Perhaps next time Leo would be more forthcoming about his personal concerns, especially when he had friends who were willing to listen and support.

Hongbin also had a conniving streak which allowed him to feel at ease with his own little game that he was playing with Leo. He knew it would seem judgmental and more than a little patronising if seen through another's eyes, as if he were trying to teach Leo a lesson. But he was willing to bear that accusation, if there was a chance Leo would open up more and depend on and trust his brothers. Or, even if just for the shallow desire to see Leo squirm for a little longer.

Pabo hyung, suffering in silence, not realising that the girl he thinks is unavailable to him, is all but waiting to say yes.

Well, maybe not even that.

Hongbin could see Siana had her head screwed on right. Although her attraction to Leo seemed obvious to Hongbin, she never tried to overstep her boundaries, which was more than could be said for the so many fans in their past who had crossed the line. The boys were used to it and accepted it as a part of their world. Sometimes it felt good, other times, Hongbin wondered what the fans really expected to result from their actions.

He had kissed enough women in his life, on and off screen, to know that attraction and compatibility didn't always go together. As performers, the boys learned very quickly to compartmentalise their feelings and desires to suit the professionalism required of them, and, as importantly, to keep the fans happy.

However, fans didn't always compartmentalise their feelings when it came to their idols, so Hongbin was rather pleasantly surprised at the level of professionalism Siana was maintaining, especially since they were inviting her into their little circle so willingly.

That would be a very heady experience for any fan.

Hongbin glanced at Leo, thinking he was probably fighting some natural emotions now, resulting in his awkward moods. There was spirited energy about him, as if he was looking for a fight.

Hongbin thought perhaps he should help diffuse some of that energy, sooner rather than later.

They walked past the kiddie playground to the little half-court that had been set up for basketball games. Siana was already on the court with Panos and two others, one of whom was the man he had seen come greet her so intimately by the van that morning. He remembered his name was Yanni, another of her cousins. The third man looked a little like him, so Hongbin assumed he was Yanni's brother.

He and Leo hung back a little, watching the play. Siana had the ball, and Panos was defending, standing behind her as she backed towards the hoop, trying to block her attempts to approach it. Panos had placed a hand low on her back to keep his distance. Hongbin felt rather than saw Leo bristle when he noticed that.

Yanni gestured for her as he was open, and she bounced the ball under Panos' outstretched arm, past his long leg. Yanni smoothly stopped it, swivelled and did a short set up, putting it into the basket neatly.

He turned to Siana with a shout and they grabbed each other's hands in victory. Panos shook his head as the other guy collected the ball.

Panos noticed them watching and called out with a smile. Hongbin walked ahead of Leo with an arm outstretched to greet him.

Panos was a truly handsome man with high cheekbones and eyes of such a light greenish hazel that, in the warm afternoon light, they looked like liquid gold. HIs blonde hair was shaggy, curling at the ends, and framed his face like the rays of the sun. When he smiled, dimples appeared in each cheek, impossibly cute and sexy at the same time.

Hongbin thought it was hilarious that the person whom Leo felt was his rival, would be as majestically handsome as the young Panos. He knew Leo would be sizing his opponent up as he walked up behind him, just as he would size up the opposing team in a sports match.

Time to take the wind out of his sails, Hongbin thought.

He turned to introduce Panos to Leo. "Hyung, this is Panos. Siana's cousin."

 

**

 

Hongbin watched Leo's step falter ever so slightly as he came forward. He did a quick double take between Panos and Siana, then remembered himself and shook Panos' outstretched hand.

"Cousins?" he asked Panos.

"Unfortunately. That idiot is Yanni," Panos said, indicating Siana's still-whooping partner, " And this idiot is Dimitri," he said, indicating his game partner, who had come up with the ball.

Hongbin smiled as he hear Leo let out a sigh, smiling and shaking hands with the two of them.

"Unfortunately?" Hongbin asked. Panos smiled, looking at Siana over his shoulder.

"The amount of work I have to do keeping that monkey out of trouble is tiresome," he muttered, shaking his head. Leo looked over at Siana, who was eyeing them suspiciously.

She shouted something in Greek to Panos. Panos exaggeratedly nodded his head. "Nai, nai, katalava!" He answered sarcastically.

Hongbin's ears perked up. "Ne?"

Panos turned back to him. "Yes. It means yes. Katalava means I understood. LOUD AND CLEAR," he said finally, for the benefit of Siana. He turned back to Hongbin, a sheepish look in his eye.

"She wants me to shut up so she can finish teaching me the true taste of defeat. Excuse me, gentlemen," Panos turned to go back to the game.

Hongbin and Leo sat on a bench to watch that scenario unfold.

"They say yes the same way we do, hyung." Leo looked at Hongbin sideways, his eyes daggers.

"Really? That is almost as interesting as the fact that you knew Panos was Siana's cousin all this time."

Hongbin feigned ignorance.

"Oh? Is there a reason I am not aware of as to why that matters so much, hyung?" Hongbin looked innocently into Leo's eyes, and could see that Leo was trying to figure just how much Hongbin knew what was going on with him. There was an internal struggle, he could tell.

Finally, he saw Leo relax a little.

"No, I just thought he was her boyfriend. When I said that earlier you didn't correct me." Leo looked accusingly at Hongbin, who sidestepped with a tactical distraction.

"Why did you think that he was her boyfriend?"

"I saw them hugging when we passed them at the school yesterday, so I thought-"

"Oooooh this explains everything!" Hongbin whistled and shook his head.

"Everything? I haven't told you anything."

"Hyung, you have been walking around with a personal dark cloud over your head. It's as if Debut Hyung was back again. Any other "secrets" you have to share? Because you seem to bear a grudge against our poor Siana over there."

"A grudge? No, not at all!" Leo glanced over at Siana with a frown on his face. Hongbin gently tapped his finger on Leo's eyebrow. Leo smacked his hand away.

"There. That. If she saw you now, she would think she was offending you somehow, just playing basketball and minding her own business with her own family."

Leo schooled his features, looking away and gripping his hands. He leaned forward, his elbows on his knees.

"You did see her in the studio, didn't you?"

Leo nodded, laughing quietly to himself in embarrassment.

"N and Hyuk saw too, I didn't do anything wrong, did I?"

"Well, you all did something wrong. But you alone were your usual self and turned a little secret into a big one. We could have all been laughing about it together, and you could have been getting to know Siana by now. What's the big deal anyway? It's not like you're interested." Hongbin was fishing now.

Leo slowly looked up at Siana, who was struggling to block the ball as Panos was about to shoot.

"Am I really like that?" he murmured.

"Like what?"

Leo turned to look at Hongbin, his knuckles white as he interlocked them.

"Angry. Scary. Do you think I made her scared?"

"No, she's not a wimp. And you're only frightening on the field. In real life, you're not really that scary, hyung." Hongbin put an apologetic hand on Leo's shoulder, making Leo laugh.

"But you thought I didn't like her."

Hongbin threw up his hands in despair. There was no talking tactfully with this kid, he just didn't get the hint.

"Hyung, I know that you like her. And the others would too, if they stopped to look at you. Just come clean. It's obvious anyway!"

Leo looked at Hongbin with such distress that Hongbin laughed.

"Hyung! It's not the end of the world if people know what you're thinking or feeling!"

"It is if that's the last thing I want them to know!" Leo was practically wailing in that soft voice of his. He buried his reddening face in his hands.

"Leo-ssi, you're acting like you have never been through this before. Stop it and be a man!" Hongbin giggled, slapping Leo on the back.

Through his hands Leo whined, "Every time I go through this, it's like I've never been through it before!"

Hongbin smiled. What an Adorable Hyung hyung was.

"So underneath that crabby old man exterior beats the virgin heart of a romantic?" he teased. Leo started laughing, hiding his head in the crook of his elbow as Hongbin pushed him till he crumpled over.

"All those girls you have forgotten, hyung, you just move on so easily?!"

Leo shook his head helplessly.

"Do you want me to believe you are a true romantic, in lurve with falling in luurve? Please!" Hongbin sat up, dusting himself off.

Leo sat up, feeling wrung out. So Hongbin knew all. He had been playing with him.

He felt happily used.

Sore that Hongbin had really been stringing him along, but happy that he had a comrade who knew his mind. Leo looked at Hongbin, feeling both suspicious of him and thankful for him. He knew Hongbin was the model of discretion, someone who didn't feel the need to tell all just because he knew something juicy. He had no need for that sort of attention.

He also realised that Hongbin enjoyed playing these sorts of games, whilst he liked to walk the straight line when it came to relationships. It was part of the reason keeping his foolish secrets were such a burden to him. At least now, some of that was lightened.

"How long have you known?"

"Since you tried to make us believe you had never been down that staircase. "Oh, look, this leads downstairs to the yard where Mr Mikhalis is". Psshhh!"

"Why didn't you say anything then?"

"Because you already looked burdened. I would have embarrassed you."

"You guys always embarrass me."

"But it would have mattered to you how you looked to her."

They both looked at Siana, who just laid up a ball and scored. She whooped like a jock and tried to chest bump Yanni, who pushed her away with disgust. She and Panos laughed as they all started walking off the court.

"How in the world would you know that?" Leo looked at Hongbin.

"Hyung, you're so relaxed nowadays, you know how to charm people without any discomfort on your part. You have finally realised that being charming on stage or at fanmeets is part of our work - it doesn't really mean anything, it's just fun. And most of our fans know that. But you were so different this morning. Everyone else was comfortable except you.

Was her dancing really something special?"

Leo looked at Siana as she chatted with the boys after their game.

"It's not like that. We've seen a thousand dances like that, on stage and in rehearsal. I guess it was because I was spying on a private moment. And she was enjoying herself. Really having fun, laughing. And also... She saw me."

"What?"

Hongbin looked at Siana. Was she playing games too?

Leo continued.

"I don't think she knows it was me. She might think it was Ken. Or you."

Hongbin felt relieved that his initial estimation of Siana was true.

He realised that she would likely think it was Ken from his behaviour when he met her. It dawned on him that Leo might be jealous of Ken too, as well as relieved that he was not the only suspect.

Hongbin looked at his hyung. There were many more levels to his predicament than Hongbin had realised.

"Hyung, Ken might come on strong, but he'a always playing, you know that."

Leo nodded, looking unconvinced.

"Think of it from her point of view. Would she be more comfortable with me, or with Ken?"

Hongbin looked at Siana again. She was laughing with the boys, avoiding their tickles and rough-housing. She looked carefree and happy. Then he looked at Leo and saw the true colours of his worries.

Leo didn't feel he could give her that, and had ended up proving the same. Of all things, he wasn't carefree and silly like Ken, or her cousins. Well, at least not to her.

"Hyung, you got off on the wrong foot. You're the real baby of the group, everybody knows that."

Leo looked at him disparagingly, making him laugh.

"Crabby ahjussi on the outside, gooey pudding on the inside." Hongbin batted his eyes at Leo.

They were interrupted by Panos, who shouted for them to come play. Yanni and his brother waved as they went off together, done for the day. Leo steeled himself with a deep breath as he stood up, and Hongbin patted him on the back, chatting idly about being out of practise. They approached the courts and split into two groups, Leo and Panos on one team and Siana and Hongbin on another.

They were surprised to find Siana and Panos didn't pull their punches, they went all out to score and were quite competitive with each other. Leo liked that. He didn't like holding back when it came to games. There was no purpose to sports for him unless it was to do his best.

Random play that wasn't for a warmup bored him - which explained his predilection for team games. Achieving something based on teamwork and collaboration was a feat that couldn't be matched by the display of pure physical prowess or speed in solo sports. Being able to use his physical talents for the benefit of others and as a team, suited him very much as he knew when to lead and when to support. He enjoyed being able to depend on his team too, knowing that they rose or fell as one. Perhaps it was a need to shine without having to bear total responsibility for the outcome that comforted him. Perhaps it was knowing that people had his back. Perhaps it was just a love of the game.

He found being in an idol group was very similar.

Each member contributed something that the others couldn't, whether it be from ability or even from personality or character. The dynamics of the group were very important, and he couldn't imagine Vixx working with even a single member less.

He wondered how other groups who had replaced or lost members adjusted to their new situation. They must have come to view it as more of a business arrangement. Just work.

He felt that if Vixx couldn't continue as one, then it wouldn't be Vixx anymore.

He knew Hongbin was a better and more fluid player than he was, but he and Panos had height on their side, as long as they didn't lose the ball to the other team during an offense. He had seen a little of what Siana and Panos could do, but he was unfamiliar with them and didn't want to underestimate their abilities.

He played hard, him and Panos gaining a lead right from the beginning. Leo was behind Panos when he saw Hongbin tying to smile at Siana for encouragement, but she was already staring down Panos as she went for the ball. The determination in her eyes was real, and he could see Panos steeling himself to go for it too. He tried to lay up a shot, but Siana was keeping a tight defense, so he turned to pass to Leo, who was ready to receive the ball.

As he did so, she shadowed the ball, intending to follow it as it went to Leo, because Hongbin was still on the other side of her, too far away to defend. Panos, who had not realised that Leo was too far to his left, had turned right, and had to overcompensate to make sure the ball went to Leo. He lost his balance, and took a long step to keep his footing.

Siana went flying over his suddenly outstretched leg, tripping over it and falling headlong into Leo's outstretched arms. She tried to twist out of the way at the last moment, but before they knew it, she had slammed into him, the ball bouncing away.

Leo, whose eye was on the ball, didn't realise the force with which she hit him, and couldn't brace himself fast enough. As they fell sideways, he wrapped his arms around her tight and twisted so that he would take the full force of the impact as they hit the ground.

Time seemed to draw out in a long moment as he felt the air rush past his ears and the ground seemingly coming up to body slam him. She fell bodily on him, her ponytail whipping against his face and neck.

He groaned, winded so hard he saw stars.

The air left his lungs and seemed to create a vacuum in there, making it hard for him to take a new breath. Thankfully she didn't crack her head against his, but she might as well have, as the jolt from impact seemed to rattle his brain.

As the dust settled, he dimly saw Hongbin and Panos come up to them in a rush and look down in concern. He could hear them asking them if they were alright, but he couldn't quite make out the words.

He blinked his eyes, trying to get them into focus. By the time his vision cleared, he could see Hongbin stifling a smirk, and Panos looking down at Siana with mock disdain.

He realised he still had his arms tightly clasped around Siana's arms and waist, and she was lying right on top of him on her side, her head cradled in his chest. He released her, and she slid off onto her back, trapping his arm under her neck.

He heard Hongbin tut-tutting as Panos said in a ruminative tone, "That looks like a foul, in my opinion. For shame, Siana."

"Excessive blocking and severe contact. I didn't think you would resort to that, hyung," Hongbin muttered in Korean, shaking his head.

Leo looked down at Siana lying along the length of the side of his body, whose face was flushed as she opened her eyes. She twisted out of his half-embrace, lifting her head up to look at him.

"Are you okay?" she asked, concerned.


	4. Souvenirs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So many boys and one too many uninterested, it seems

Leo saw her eyes were dark with worry, her upturned face close to his. He finally managed to inhale, deeply, catching her scent, a mixture of her delightful shampoo and fresh sweat.

He felt his breath catch in his throat, and he let out a gasp. She sat up in alarm, looking down at him.

"Can you breathe?" She laid a hand on his chest, then pulled it away abruptly, moving it instead to his arm to help him sit up. He nodded brusquely, resting his arms on his bent knees as he coughed before lifting his head to look up at Hongbin.

She looked up at Panos, "Oh god, I've cracked his rib or something!"

"You okay, hyung?" Leo wondered that Hongbin finally had the decency to look concerned. He nodded. He went to get up, and found the boys' arms encircling his own immediately.

"Siana, you should consider a career in American football. Or MMA," joked Panos as Hongbin and Siana helped Leo up. Leo disengaged immediately, feeling embarrassed by the fuss. He ran a hand through his hair, his eyes cast down.

"Are you okay?" he murmured to Siana, who was scowling at Panos. She turned to look at him, her face softening into a small shy smile.

"I'm fine. I didn't even touch the ground thanks to you," Her gaze rested on his chest for a moment before she looked back up at him. "Sorry about that. I didn't expect this big lug to get in my way," she said, giving Panos the dagger eyes.

Leo unconsciously stepped back as Siana reached out to put a hand on his arm. He saw her immediately withdraw her hand in shock, her eyes going from worried to disappointed. She clasped her hands together, unsure of what to do.

Hongbin looked at Leo in surprise.

"It was an accident, hyung," he said placatingly, smiling at Siana. Panos stepped forward between them.

"It was my fault, I knew she was there but I lost my balance."

"No, no, I was too aggressive, I should have let it go." Siana almost whispered.

Leo felt a flare of anger light up inside of him. He felt angry with himself that he couldn't keep upright when she bumped into him, that it had taken him so long to recover. Angry that he had lain there unconsciously holding Siana tight while the others had teased them. Angry that he had recoiled from her because he didn't want to be pitied. Which she wasn't doing, anyway. Angry that everyone thought he was angry - and it was only so because of his own reluctance to explain himself.

And he felt even more angry that she felt she had to apologise for being aggressive in a game of basketball. He could handle aggression on the court, why couldn't he handle this feeling he had?

He could see the weight of tension in the air, all because everyone was waiting to see his response. He felt put on the spot, and irritated that he couldn't instantly find it within himself to put her at ease. He looked to Hongbin, who was staring at him with his head cocked to one side, and remembered what he had said earlier.

He made a concerted effort to relax himself, easing the frown off his face. As a sportsman, he instinctively knew what he had to say to her. He shook his head and smiled.

"No, don't be sorry for going for it. I just... didn't expect you to be so... strong," he mumbled in embarrassment.

Hongbin laughed, clearly relieved. Leo felt the tension dissipate immediately.

Panos let out a dramatic gasp.

"Did you hear that? He called you heavy," he stage-whispered out of the side of his mouth to Siana. He pursed his lips prissily as he raised an eyebrow at her.

She stage-whispered back, "Are you deaf? He called me a go-getter."

She crinkled up her eyes as she smiled up at Leo, relieved and happy to hear his words.

Leo felt an indescribable relief that he had been able to allay her fears that she had hurt or offended him, and was pleased to see her smiling up at him so warmly. He wondered what it was that had him so tied up in knots that he could create such a tense situation, and realised it was his own self-consciousness, not wanting to look silly, or weak.

In the end what mattered most was that nobody was hurt, and that Siana didn't feel she had caused him harm or offence. He saw Hongbin smiling, and realised having him talking in his ear gently about his predicament had been of great help to him. He was grateful for that.

He was surprised by how easy it had been for him to change the tone of the situation. He should have done this earlier.

He heard a comical beep and turned to see their mini bus pull up on the street.

Ken had wound down a window and poked his head out. He was smiling that cute smile that made his eyes shine.

He called out to them in a piercingly shrill voice to get in the bus for the ride home. Panos picked up the ball and shook Hongbin and Leo's hands, then leaned in for a hug and a wet kiss on the cheek for Siana. She pushed him away in disgust, cursing at him in Greek.

Hongbin and Leo turned to Siana to invite her to take the bus home with them. She shook her head, gesturing to the bike, which she had to ride home.

"I'm very cold all of a sudden. Maybe Leo hyung can walk with you," Hongbin said, practically over his shoulder as he sprinted for the bus. He shut the door and sat down, pulling Ken back from the window and shutting it before he could insist on joining them for a walk too.

Leo and Siana watched in stunned silence as the bus pulled away and headed back to their home.

He felt a tug of emotions, being happy to have some time alone with Siana, and feeling abandoned at the same time. He laughed at himself. He wasn't a schoolboy anymore, and it wasn't as if he couldn't hold his own in a conversation.

He looked down at her as she tidied her hair and tucked it into her hoodie as she pulled it up. The evening chill was starting to set in, and they were still slightly sweaty from play. She picked up her jacket and slipped it on, then walked over to the bike, unhooking the pedal from the kerb and turning to look at him with a smile.

"You hungry?" she asked, her eyes bright.

 

**

 

They walked to Miami, Leo pushing the bike for her, even though it was too low for him to be comfortable. The sun was low in the sky but it was still bright and the sky was clear.

They sat at an outside table and ordered with Affendi some coffees and mezze, or pikilies - small snack plates with cheese and olives. Leo realised he hadn't eaten lunch yet. The tiny plates looked too pitifully small for him, but he supposed he would be having dinner soon.

Siana touched his arm briefly, and he turned to look at her.

"Are you really okay? I didn't hurt you, did I?"

He nodded, letting out a shy laugh. She kept watching him, as if to make sure he wasn't just pretending for her benefit. He felt as if his ears were burning, and he went to pick up a snack to munch, then felt a little too self-conscious to do so, so he put his hand back in his lap. She thought he was being polite, so she sat up and pushed the plate closer to him.

"Please, eat."

When he didn't, she picked up a piece of cheese and popped it into her mouth, chewing happily.

Siana closed her eyes and turned her face up towards the sky, a small smile playing on her lips. Leo picked up a of cheese as well and put it into his mouth. It was still quiet, but Leo could hear cars driving now and the sound of children playing as the town began to come back to life. He watched her for a moment, then did the same as she did, closing his eyes against the light of the sun as it was beginning to set, and feeling a small breeze play across his features as he chewed.

He heard her clear her throat, so he peeked out of one eye to see her, only to find she was squinting up at him with a wide smile. He smiled back. He was beginning to feel anxious that he had nothing to say.

She seemed totally at ease, though. She kept chewing, thoughtfully.

"It's nice to sit in silence, isn't it?" She said, looking out at the calm sea. "Very calming."

"Quiet is good," he ventured.

"Is it easy living with five other people?" she asked, taking a sip of her coffee.

"I'm used to living with other people. I don't know what it is like to live alone," he answered, shrugging.

"I'm the only child. At home it's just me and my mother. Here, I even have my own place. I like it, taking care of myself."

"Isn't it lonely?" Leo asked. He liked being alone, but he knew there was always someone willing to hang out, whether he was home with his family or back in the dorm. Whenever it got too much, he just walked out of his room and joined the group.

"I spend the whole day with people, usually. I don't feel lonely at all. Anyway, being alone is not the same as being lonely."

Leo nodded, knowing what she meant.

Sometimes, he felt exhausted just being with people in the same room. Too much noise, too many opinions, too much stimulus.

But most times, the silence made him depressed.

Siana continued, chatting comfortably. As he listened, he realised that something had changed between them, as if a wall had dropped away. Perhaps it was because she had knocked him down, and they had passed some threshold which by necessity did away with all pretences and self-consciousness. Somewhere between Hongbin leaving them on the court to sitting down at the outdoor table, Siana had decided she felt at ease with him.

Or perhaps he had decided he felt at ease with her.

"I have a tonne of relatives. I teach a bunch of noisy kids. There is always music or dance going on. So, I don't mind being around lots of people. But to be honest, the best part of meeting up with all my friends, is the walk I take alone to get there, or the quiet time I have getting home."

Siana laughed, a merry twinkle in her eye.

"Isn't that funny? Meeting up with people just so I can enjoy the moments before and after?"

Leo felt extraordinarily charmed by her words, and her sweet laughing eyes.

He felt she had encapsulated perfectly what he had always found difficult to articulate: that feeling that there were certain moments in life made sweeter by the events that came before and after. Contrast. Shade. Perspective.

Except, she saw being alone as positive, whilst he saw it as negative. She recharged in her down time, he recharged surrounded by people. He guessed that, while she seemed more cheerful and outgoing, she was truly an introvert; whilst he, who seemed more reluctant and shy in a crowd, actually depended on the energy of others, as an extravert.

He supposed this was why he came alive onstage, and seemed to become a different person. It was a mix of acting and performance that was required of him, but also a sort of catharsis for his psyche, to become the domineering stage persona that he did.

It was as much a part of him as being unable to chitchat comfortably with strangers.

He responded to her chuckle, smiling as his eyes dropped to her lips, which were a cherry red from all the exercise. They curved upwards over her teeth, one of which was slightly crooked in front, giving her smile a sweetness he had never seemed to notice in all the beautiful girls he worked with back home.

Perhaps it was her slightly exotic look, perhaps it was all the events that had taken place that day.

He didn't know exactly what it was, but he had a sudden and powerful urge to lean forward and taste her mouth with his lips.

He looked away roughly. He covered his sudden action with a cough, then looked back at her.

She kept chatting, relaxed.

"Sorry, I guess it doesn't make any sense. But everything's nicer in moderation. Because when the good stuff happens, it is all the more exciting and beautiful to me," she said guilelessly. Although she apologised, it seemed to Leo that she didn't really feel sorry for her belief. Her natural confidence was real.

"I've never understood the need for drugs. I want to hang on to life, not escape from it. Plenty of time for escaping in my dreams."

She leaned back in her chair, letting her head face up to the sky.

"You guys must be exposed to that life a lot, huh?"

"That life?"

"Fast living, drugs, girls," she turned to him, her face curious. "What do your parents think of it all?"

Leo was taken aback, and she noticed that.

"You don't have to answer," she stated matter-of-factly before turning her face back up to the sky. She went back to her thoughts for a moment. He guessed she must have thought it was a sensitive issue. She continued.

"Or maybe you're more like monks. Train, train, train, music, music, music, work, work, work. Like shaolin monks. Or like army cadets. But work is good. Feels good to be useful."

She seemed to understand things about him and his world that he didn't expect from someone outside of his world. A fan, who had yet to display any fan-like qualities. She seemed so relatable, so knowing, yet so nonjudgmental. It felt refreshing.

Then he realised in fact, it was he who wasn't acting like a pop idol, having been grumpy, secretive and unforthcoming for the better part of the day.

She seemed to be leading him in the maturity ranks.

Leo liked what he was hearing, but he liked what he was seeing even more.

He checked himself, knowing that there was a line that he was about to cross - that if he didn't stop himself, he would want to see things through in a way that he didn't see was possible.

He was Leo from Vixx, here on a working holiday, and there was no possibility that what he very much wished he could do, could happen.

He felt pressured by the lack of time, the impossible circumstances, and that he was the celebrity he was. He knew that he had to pull back, before he fell into that dark pit of lovesickness that he could see himself diving into.

He decided that being friends was all they could be, and that being friendly was a great way to stop thinking of her the way he wanted to.

Friends don't cross that line, after all.

He sipped his now-cold coffee, looking at the sky. The sun had set without him noticing, but the sky was still light. In the twilight, stars had appeared, and they twinkled brightly in the grey blue sky.

"We're here to work, actually," he volunteered. "We have set some goals that we need to achieve before our return."

"And then you will be rehearsing for the concerts. Yeah, one will be in my city, but I'll miss it because I'll be here helping my dad."

Leo could hear a trace of disappointment in her voice, but she was still smiling.

"That's too bad, we could have given you a backstage pass to come visit after the show."

Siana's smile disappeared. She sat up, serious.

"Don't say that, it makes me feel worse. If I was able to go back for the concert, would you really say that?"

"Yes, because it's true."

Siana turned away with a bitter laugh, then in mock fury, banged her clenched fists on the table, looking at him with such a cute WTF expression that he involuntarily laughed.

"Because it would be pretty pissy if you said that just because you knew you didn't have to keep that promise," she lectured, waggling her finger. He laughed at her, reaching out without thinking and catching her finger with one hand. He brought her hand close, and put his other hand on top.

He looked her in the eye, and for a satisfying moment, he saw her catch her breath and stop laughing. He knew then that he had an effect on her, and it made him feel good. He let the moment draw out as he paused to stare deeply into her eyes. He let the moment drag out before delivering his punchline proudly.

"That's exactly why I said it," he drawled.

She closed her eyes and turned away, biting her lip and trying not to laugh. When she turned back, her smile was bright, naughty.

"You can take your filthy hands off my finger now, thank you."

He let her go, chuckling. She put her head in her hands as she laughed, a mixture of despair and hysteria.

"Seriously, if you could come to the concert, we would get you a backstage pass," he said, leaning forward to so that he could speak in a hushed, conspirational tone.

Siana wailed quietly into her hands. Then she suddenly pushed back her hair and took a deep breath.

"Let's go before I kill you," she said curtly, waving to Affendi for the bill. They sat at the table smiling to themselves as he brought it to them. Leo had no money, but she had whipped out cash from a small pouch before he could say anything. She placed the receipt in the pouch and zipped it up.

"Thanks for the snacks, I will bill you." She pushed her chair back as she stood up, her smile still a mix of rueful glee. He was glad to see she had a great sense of humour, and that she seemed to like it sarcastic and dry.

He stood up and followed her back to the kerb where they got her bike and walked the rest of the way home.

She parked the bike and he followed her into the apartment building. They got into the lift, Siana turning as soon as she got in, to avoid their earlier predicament. Leo stood, practically hunching in the little cab. As they rode up to her floor, he felt an overwhelming pull towards her.

He felt as if he barely had control over himself, and realised that if he didn't get a grip, he would turn to her, press her body against the wall and kiss her deeply. He wanted to shake his head and shout out loud to rid himself of the urge, because he didn't think he could stop himself if he let that urge take over. For all he knew, she thought of him as an acquaintance, a guest she had to be nice to. But he had a lingering hunch that she was attracted to him too.

He bowed his head and closed his eyes in what felt like a superhuman effort to think of something else.

He felt a soft touch on his sleeve, and his eyes fluttered open in surprise. That she was touching him made his nerves all jumpy.

He looked at her, seeing that she had turned to face him. She removed her hand, folding it with her other arm across her chest. He stared at her eyes in a concerted effort not to look at her there. Her expression was one of genuine curiosity.

"Would you guys be more interested in the touristy stuff? I mean, I can show you the activities I roughly planned this afternoon."

He cleared his throat. "Anything will be fine," he said, his mouth suddenly dry. He leaned back, trying to put some distance between her and himself. Maybe he was deluding himself. While he was trying to rein in his wild feelings, she was going over their agenda. He felt out of sync, in his own world.

"Really? Hmm. Maybe I can show Mr Kim this evening and he can discuss it with you all," she said, absentmindedly reaching up to play with the end of her ponytail. He looked at her fingers as they twirled her hair expertly.

Be friendly. Be friends. What do they call it? The friend zone. That's where he needed to be.

"Yes, show him. We'll discuss it tomorrow," he said.

"Do you guys work out?" she asked suddenly.

"What?" Why was she asking that all of a sudden?

"Work out. Exercise? Do you need to go to a gym? Or do you want to do sports? Or other exercise? Because there is no gym here, only in the next town. So you would have to schedule that sort of thing."

"Oh. Uh... "

"I'll put some options in the list."

"Yes."

"Do you want to go out?" she asked again, suddenly. Leo couldn't believe his ears.

"Do I want to go out?" he practically squeaked. He was about to ask, "with you?" when she continued.

"Because there are some clubs here, but they are small. The big ones are in Arachova, but they only really get going on the weekends when the city folk come."

The lift stopped abruptly at her floor, and she pushed the door open. She turned and smiled, saying that she would let Mr Kim know.

Leo smiled back, feeling like he was straining. He stepped out, explaining that he would just walk the rest of the way up. She smiled, just as the door to the apartment opened to reveal Ken, who beamed a bright smile at Siana.

"Leo-hyung, what took you all so long?" he asked, not looking at Leo at all. Leo decided that he needed to take control of the situation immediately, and that trusting in Ken was not a viable option for him right now. Leo had a lot of excess energy inside that he felt needed channeling into positive action.

He strode towards Ken, pulling him inside the apartment and turning to shut the door. He kept a firm grip on Ken's upper arm as he held him fast to his side.

He gave Siana a last look at the door, saying, "I think I will speak to Kkomae about it now."

He bowed his head to her, as she said a cheerful goodbye and fished out her key. He closed the door before Ken could do anything.

Finally distanced from Siana, he let out a sigh. Ken allowed himself to be virtually dragged by the neck into the kitchen where Kkomae and Min Seok were watching the small wall-mounted television. They turned to acknowledge Leo as he came in.

"Hey we found a great place outside of town, near the marina. Seafood. Then we drove west along the coastline for about an hour, and guess, what? We found the wind farm! It's a small one, but it's spread all along this huge hill and cliff that hangs over the sea. It's so dramatic. We should shoot some footage there. I wonder if we need permission if they're just in the background?"

Leo sat Ken at the table. Ken looked up at Leo eagerly.

"Hyung, you spent some time with Siana, what's she like?" he asked.

"Off limits," Leo answered curtly, pulling out a tiny chair to sit on next to the others.

"Aggh, everyone is off limits, though," Ken turned to Kkomae. "Right?"

Kkomae took a deep breath and started reciting as if from memory, the same old spiel he pulled out for these moments with Ken.

"Your contract does not specify limited behaviour when it comes to relationships but does specify prioritising group activities during the tenure of your agreement. Thus whilst it is within your discretion as to what you do with your private life, all private activities shouldn't compromise public, group, or company agenda."

Leo turned to Ken with dead eyes. "Off limits," he said in a quiet voice.

"What do you mean? I can't be friends? I can't chat? Go out, watch a movie?" Ken asked, cutely of course.

"The nearest cinema is about 2 hours away," Min Seok said distractedly.

Ken sighed in frustration.

"We will be here for so long. We're not monks, you know," Ken rested his chin on his hand, looking at Leo for support.

Leo realised Ken had no inkling of what had transpired during the day between himself and Siana. His words reminded him of what Siana had said earlier about idol groups being like monks, and he softened his attitude toward Ken. He was naturally effusive and fun-loving, so how could he hold it against Ken that he was attracted to Siana too?

Ken has no idea what I am feeling, and I shouldn't mistreat him by distrusting him.

"You are coming on too strong, don't you think?" Leo tried.

"She liked it," Ken smiled.

"Everyone likes it when you come on to them. Even the boys," Leo mumbled. Ken nodded his head, smiling, and framing his face with his hands in a flower pot pose.

"It's just that I am so loveable," he said, playing.

But Leo had to admit he was right. He was truly loveable, and it made him jealous for a moment. Ken seemed to have no qualms about falling headlong into a relationship, whatever sort of relationship he was thinking of.

Whereas he always put those thoughts last, and now that he was consumed by them, he was trying so hard to pull back while Ken was getting ready for the plunge.

It made him envious of Ken, and he couldn't help feeling resentment. Why Ken and not me? He thought.

The words made Leo think again.

Why not me?

 

**

 

Siana shut the door behind her and took off all her outer layers, heading to her bathroom for another shower.

It was close to 7 now, and she knew that her dad would be hankering to catch up with her or go out for a meal together. She texted him and asked if he wanted to go out, or if he had already eaten, then dropped her phone onto the bed and peeled off all her clothes.

She jumped into the shower, ready for the hot water to heat up her body which felt cold and sticky from drying perspiration. She lathered up and washed her hair again, loving the clean feeling it gave her scalp.

What an eventful day. Playing basketball with the boys had certainly relaxed her after the initial shocking introduction she had had to them. She felt more at ease, even before the Leo accident that made it impossible for her to keep her distance or remain shy.

Because of it, she had the opportunity to show concern for Leo, whom she had decked so unceremoniously on the town council basketball court. And Hongbin... gentlemanly Hongbin had clearly attempted to smooth things over when it had looked like Leo was very put out by the whole incident.

She remembered the moment Leo had seemed to recoil from her when she tried to touch his arm out of concern, and then his subsequent effort to put her at ease and convince her that he wasn't upset.

She surmised that his initial surliness had been a very strong reaction of embarrassment rather than contempt for her clumsiness.

And that realisation made her coo over his self-conscious soul. She didn't think she could adore him more than in that instant that she realised that he was vulnerable and had his own set of fears just like everyone else.

Well, maybe when he grabbed her finger and made fun of her. She had looked into those momentarily serious eyes as they had turned naughty and curved into laugh lines when he made fun of her despair at missing their concert, and had felt something she hadn't felt ever: the urge to kill someone absolutely drop dead gorgeous.

She had tried so hard to be casual, relaxed, at ease - for his sake. She wanted him to forget what had happened on the court. She knew that moments like that could keep appearing in a self-conscious person's thoughts, bugging them and making them cringe at themselves. Distraction, relaxation and conversation was what she thought would best suit their brief time together at Miami. So she had yacked on and on in an effort to give him time to get comfortable.

And she was making such headway until he found out she knew about their concert and was going to miss it. Then he showed his evil side. His rub-it-in sense of humour. His kick-a-person-while-they-were down sensibility.

She loved it. And she gave back as good as she got.

She rinsed the shampoo from her hair and slathered on some conditioner as she tended to the rest of her body with soap. She was proud of the strength her body had. Of course, her muscles were toned from dancing, but it was her physical strength that made her happy. She felt good to be able to keep up with others better and faster than her. She felt good that her body served her well.

Her hands slowed as they reached her belly. She had considered a navel piercing but wasn't the type to show off her midriff. Although she wasn't self-conscious or prudish about showing her skin, she didn't feel the need to, and didn't want to unless it was for the benefit of a show. She told herself it was because then she had control over how people thought about her.

She laughed at herself. What did it matter anyway? She would twerk at the drop of a hat in a dance studio. That didn't leave much to the imagination. Then again, she wouldn't do it on the dance floor unless it was for laughs or for work. The kind of twerking that was for the sole purpose of attracting male attention was for other girls with a larger sense of personal bravado, to do. Which was cool with her, but she simply didn't operate that way.

She finished showering, rinsing off and then towelling dry vigorously. Although the bathroom was hot and steamy, the draught coming in under the door was chilly. She came out and pulled on heavy fleece-lined leggings, a turtleneck over her undershirt and a denim miniskirt. Her lithe body looked good in the turtleneck, and her miniskirt was A-line and skimmed over her hips and butt and showed off her lean leg muscles. She checked her phone - her dad had messaged that he was in the studio, the recording studio which he rarely used.

She raised an eyebrow. He must be preparing to hand it over to the boys. Or Ravi, to be precise.

She texted that she would be down to pick him up and they could go for a drive together before dinner.

"Want to go to Delphi?" she took a gamble, loving the idea of driving up to Delphi in the evening for some Greek mountain food. Namely, roast lamb on a spit and mountain vegetables.

Her dad texted back, "If I can finish up in a half hour, let's go."

She frowned. He didn't have to prepare the studio for them now, he could do it later when they came back. She wondered if they wanted to use it right away.

She grabbed her jacket and swung it on. She put money and her new driver's license into an inner zipped pocket, and looked into the cupboard for her favourite beanie - a bulky one with a huge pompom on it that her mum had made her a few years ago. She was a tad underdressed for the mountains, but she figured with the clear weather today she wouldn't be too cold. Besides, they would go straight from the car to the restaurant and would be back before she knew it.

She locked up and walked down to the ground floor. Opposite her father's apartment door were two other doors, one leading to the unused studio which was actually above the dance studio. Except for a long and high window, there was no access from the yard to the studio. The other door was a one-bedroom apartment which faced the main road.

She tried the studio door, which opened into a tiny sound-proofed vestibule, just about as wide as a hallway with enough room to swing open the other door ahead of her. This was a heavy door, also sound-proofed, and swung inwards to reveal the gloomy light of the rear of her father's studio. She knew that as she went in, she would see a huge plush sofa to the right against the back wall, and at the far end, a glass-encased, sound-proofed voice room. Between them both was the huge counter, which had been built around an old recording deck that was as big as a table - now useless and covered with a perspex box that protected the old vintage artefact. On top of that lay the actual recording console which was connected to a keyboard synthesiser and the simple but powerful sound system set up that her father had created for his professional recordings.

She had fond memories of this gloomy room, when she would hang out, half-excited by its magic, and half bored because she was being ignored, whilst her father banged out his recordings and played the same snippets over and over as he mastered his mixes. Now, equipment was such that he could work from his own home, and his work had become less about producing final masters, but about sending off final drafts of his compositions for local producers elsewhere to polish off.

She knew he kept fastidious order in here, so she wondered why he would have to tidy anything up before letting the boys in. She stepped into the room.

To see her father in a rapid-fire conversation between Ravi and Mr Kim.

She stopped short, up until that point fully expecting to be chilling with her dad... But now he had company, and it looked serious. Professional.

On the sofa, Hyuk and N sat perched together like twin oddly-sized birds, neat, with their heads glancing left and right as they paid avid attention to each speaker in the conversation. Hyuk noticed her and waved. N noticed him and looked at her, then beckoned for her to sit next to him. He patted the sofa cushion to his side.

She slid into the spot quietly, her eyes on her dad. He seemed so animated, alive with conversation. It was rare that she could see him like this, because he rarely talked about his work when he was with her. Ravi seemed excited too, and Mr Kim in between them, was finding it hard to keep up, being the language mediator between the two. But it seemed that her dad and Ravi barely noticed they were using a third party, because they seemed to guess each other's next words, fill in the gaps, and extrapolate meanings, all on their own.

N leaned in to talk in her ear.

"Siana-ssi. Since Ravi is excited to do some work in here, I had an idea to do something for our concert. We talked with Kkomae and the company, and we can start straight away. But," here he turned to look her in the eye, "we need a girl. A girl like you."

Siana raised an eyebrow. What did THAT mean?

Hyuk piped up, "It may or may not have something to do with a love triangle."

"Because we cannot confirm anything, not at this point," said N.

"And it may or may not have something to do with our next comeback theme," said Hyuk, completing the relay he and N had going for a moment.

N put his hand on her shoulder.

"We must rely on you to be discreet. Can you do that?"

Siana nodded, absent-mindedly raising her hand as if to swear. She adjusted it to three fingers, then scolded herself. What was she doing? She was never in the brownies, or boy scouts, or anything that required her taking an oath. She used her upraised hand to tuck her hair behind her ear.

N leaned in close, his mouth at her ear.

"Will you dance with me?"

She grabbed N's arm, her eyes wide. She searched his face for any signs of laughter. Was he joking? He seemed to take her reaction in his stride.

"Are you serious?" she asked, letting go of him. Hyuk nodded, a wide smile on his face.

N continued, "You will be standing in for our dancer back home. But we will need you while we work out the choreography for a reference guide."

Siana could feel hysterical excitement welling up inside, making her want to squeal and giggle like a little girl. Working with any choreographer was exciting, but here she would be working with oh, just a couple of kpop idols who would be creating their own dance for, you know, their CONCERT!

She controlled herself, not wanting even a hint of the insane excitement she felt inside to show in her face. She didn't want to come off as too green or excitable to handle the situation.

"Well, uhm, let me think about it - YES." She said, allowing it to be known that she understood that this was a wonderful opportunity for her.

N and Hyuk laughed aloud, causing Ravi and her dad to turn and look.

Siana smiled with glee, looking at her dad with such happiness that he raised an eyebrow. Next to him, Ravi asked the boys, "What?" as he watched Siana's expression with curiosity. N and Hyuk clapped their hands as Kkomae explained to Ravi that N had an idea for a dance routine, and Siana must have said yes to helping him.

Mikhalis nodded at her proudly, then asked, "Who will be dancing?"

"Me and Ravi," said N.

Siana looked up at Ravi in surprise. She had thought she would be dancing with N and Hyuk.

Ravi looked about as surprised as she was, and they both blinked at each other for a moment, before he turned to N.

"Nobody told me about this," he said to N. "I want to work on some music. I promised something new for a JellyBox release before the concert. I won't have time, N-hyung."

"It's a love triangle. If I am one corner of the triangle, and Siana-ssi is the another, the third corner can only be you," N said matter-of-factly.

"Why me?" asked Ravi, his eyebrows raised, guffawing. She thought he looked like a little kid.

"Well, it can't be Hongbin, because for our onstage personas he and I wouldn't fight each other - we would be fighting FOR each other," said N with a pleased smile. True, thought Siana, thinking back to their Toxic live performance together. She had always liked how gender boundaries and sexuality were blurred lines in kpop, and particularly when it came to N.

"And it can't be Ken, because he would lose the match," said Hyuk, smiling. N held his hand up for a high-five without looking, and Hyuk obliged.

Ravi nodded in agreement. "Yup. Total K.O." He thought for a minute.

"What about Leo?" said Ravi. Siana felt her heart jump up into her throat. There she went again, not being able to think straight whenever Leo came up in the conversation. Dancing with Leo? In a love triangle scenario?

Well, as a professional, she could do this without any anxiety.

Of course she could.

"Oh, no, me and Leo onstage, no we would never fight over a girl. It wouldn't work. We would be too nice to each other and the girl would get tired waiting for our bromance to stop spoiling the mood. Ugh, Ravi-ssi! We've discussed this before for all our previous concerts, you know it can only be you! You are the bad guy who doesn't get the girl in the end," N said smugly, throwing a proud but playful smile at Siana. "Because the good guy is me in this scenario."

Wow, they had it all worked out. She supposed it made sense, since they were all about performance concepts anyway.

Ravi laughed a deep throaty laugh, a sound which seemed to travel down her spine and make her shiver.

"You're right, it can only be me," he said with a twinkle in his eye, looking at Siana with that smile. She smiled back, watching his lips close over his teeth as he tried to stop smiling - but they kept drawing back as if of their own free will. It was like he couldn't keep his naturally sunny personality from welling up while he was trying to be suave and together.

She always thought he had a charming way of talking, where his mouth seemed to twitch as he spoke, as if he were thinking of a private joke which he couldn't share out loud. Sometimes he seemed to be pursing those pouty lips in thought, and she wondered whether he was aware of the effect that had on all his fans. Even she, who had always had eyes for Leo on video, loved to read Ravi's lips as he spoke to the camera.

She pulled her eyes away from staring at his lips, only to see her dad was watching her closely. Trying not to cringe, she turned to N as naturally as she could, and asked, "When do you want to start?"

"Tomorrow morning?" N asked, looking back at Ravi, who nodded.

Mikhalis turned back to Ravi and Kkomae, wanting to get back to the business at hand. Siana listened while they discussed a package for the hire of the studio, which would give Ravi complete access at any time. Because they were not looking to do any mastering, just some composition and recording, they were happy with the deal and shook hands on it.

She saw her father through new eyes, since she hadn't really seen this side of him through her own adult eyes, now able to understand what was going on. She felt suddenly proud of him, because she realised he was an industry player within the world of songwriting and recording, who somehow had the respect of other artists, such as Ravi, and company executives, such as Mr Kim.

The boys bowed respectfully as they left, promising to meet her at the dance studio at eleven the next morning.

Siana watched them leave, then looked at her dad, beaming.

"Good news for both of us tonight!" she said excitedly. Mikhalis smiled and gave her a warm hug.

"I was surprised to learn that we have mutual acquaintances and colleagues. They know an old friend of mine Eric, who is based in Korea now, making money selling songs to kpop idols," he said wryly. Siana laughed.

"Don't tell me you wish you had gone that route too?"

"No, I am very happy with what I have going on here," Mikhalis smiled. He started turning off equipment that he had turned on to check and make sure the others were familiar with it all.

"Oh, guess what I found? Remember when I recorded you for that kids' yoghurt commercial back when you were a kid?"

"You still have that recording?!" Siana laughed. She remembered her dad putting her in the soundbooth and sitting together with him on the floor as he played with her, tickled her and made her sing songs with him. Then he had coaxed her to sing alone, and she remembered being very happy at the unusually focused attention she was getting.

The results of that recording session was a cute little ad about happy children full on yoghurt, with a jingle that was catchy and played across Greek television stations for a couple of years.

"Yes, I found the original recordings on the hard drive here. I thought I had ditched them after I transferred everything to my hard disks in the house."

"Aww, we had fun that day. Mum was here too," Siana said, with a slow smile.

Mikhalis nodded, checking her to see if she was sad.

"It wouldn't be a memory that would be beautiful, if we did that sort of thing over and over until now, would it?" he said gently. He didn't ever want Siana to drown in the sadness of old memories. Siana nodded.

"Absolutely true, dad. Are you hungry?"

"Yes. You are sure you can last til we get to Delphi? That's almost an hour's drive," Mikhalis said as he turned off lights and ushered her out the door.

He locked up as she absentmindedly answered yes, then he turned and almost bumped into the back of her as she had stopped suddenly in her tracks.

He looked beyond her to see two gypsies standing in their lobby, one with a cap in his hand, and the other looking around the lobby furtively. Mikhalis immediately stepped forward, asking them what they wanted.

"Could you spare us any money, just for some food?" The one with the cap asked. His skin was leathery, sunbeaten, and his teeth, though clean, were missing in places, and Mikhalis could see some of them were gold-capped in the back. The other one's eyes were jumpy, like the eyes of a kid high on meth, but then they gained surprising focus when they suddenly settled on Siana.

Mikhalis felt his hackles rise, but he kept calm.

With a casual laugh, he gestured to the first gypsy's face.

"You could sell one of those gold teeth for more than a few meals, sir."

The gypsy's smile was almost a wince as he replied, "I have sold many teeth, and lost a few too."

Mikhalis nodded, keeping his tone light. There were many stories in the man's eye that he could see, even though he remained tightlipped.

Mikhalis decided that the master of the two was the mad-eyed one who was scoping out the place. He didn't like the all-too sudden look of curiosity he was giving Siana, and was sure she was feeling upset by the undesired attention.

Suddenly, she stepped forward, a tight smile on her face, holding out a ten-euro note.

"I hope this is enough for a meal for you both," she said, putting the note into the first man's hand which held his cap. Mikhalis felt a moment of panic as he knew that either of them could be dangerous, and could lash out and attack her, but he kept himself still. He realised she was trying to placate the man, and touch was a way of signalling that she cared, or at least, did not think of him as repulsive or forgotten. It was clever, but he wondered if she was being brave or careless.

Siana stepped back, putting her arm around her dad's and looking up at him pointedly.

"Come on dad, we'll be late," she said, trying to pull him along outside. The mad-eyed one stepped into her way, too close for Mikhalis to stand. He put an arm out against the man's chest.

"That's enough for him. What about me?" Mad Eye whispered.

 

**

 

Mad Eye was staring down Siana, who held her own, looking back at him with a steady gaze. Mikhalis felt a strength emanating from deep within her eyes. He knew in that instant that she would fight if she had to, which was something he had never really seen in her. Then again, they had never been in this situation before, where she seemed to be the target. It was a great reassurance to him that she had that fight in her.

Just then two men appeared in the stairwell, who seemed to be taking the steps four at a time as they chatted idly, coming down the stairs.

Mikhalis and Siana didn't let their gaze waver as the men behind them took in the situation and stopped talking. Mikhalis heard them step forward immediately, bristling in anticipation. He noted that they were two of the group of guests, but not any of whom he had just spoken to in the studio.

"Is everything okay here?" He heard one of them say in Korean. Siana said, "Mhhhmmm. They were just leaving."

The gypsy with the cap in his hand glanced between the men and Mikhalis and Siana, seeming to weigh the situation. He must have decided it was worth leaving, as he put his arm around Mad Eye, who seemed to lose focus at his touch and start looking around furtively again.

"Thank you for your kindness, sorry to bother you," he managed to say as he pulled on Mad Eye and guided him out the door.

One of the men walked forward with powerful strides, as if to usher them out the door, using his height and bulk to advance menacingly, right outside to the kerb, where he watched until they were out of sight.

Mikhalis looked at Siana to check if she was okay. She turned calm and steady eyes up at him and smiled a rueful smile. To his relief, she wasn't so much scared as sad that there was such a situation.

"Those two... they seem desperate. Not like the other gypsies we have seen who tend to keep to themselves."

Siana talked in a calm voice. She looked past Mikhalis to the two men that had gathered around them.

Mikhalis turned to thank them for their help. They were two of the guests who had come into the dance studio with the other character, the one Mikhalis had warned Siana about that morning. One was all dimply smiles and genuine concern, the other a glowering hulk of a boy, the one who had made sure the vagabonds had left the building.

"Thank you for your help boys, your timing was perfect."

Siana introduced them - Dimples she called Hongbin, and the other she called Leo. He liked the look of them both, even the angry-browed Leo, because they had stepped up as soon as they saw they were needed.

"Well, usually I am the one the guests call upon to get rid of unwanted people, not the other way around. Perhaps you boys would like to join us for dinner? It is the least I can do," Mikhalis said graciously.

Dimples bowed and said they would love to, but that they had arranged to meet up with the others for dinner out.

"Oh. Where will you all be going?" Mikhalis asked.

"Delphi," replied Dimples. Mikhalis and Siana looked at each other.

"You seem to be reading our minds."

Dimples' eyes widened. "Are you going there too?"

"Yes. Do you boys know where to go? How to get there?" Mikhalis asked.

"Yes we have the navi. We looked up some reviews on the net. We're going to Taverna Vakhos."

"Oh, the owner is my old schoolmate. Why don't we all meet there?" The boys looked at each other before Dimples nodded. Mikhalis noted that Leo was looking at Siana in concern, though he wasn't saying anything. Siana seemed to be in her own world of thought and didn't notice him staring.

Mikhalis steered Siana outside, wanting to get into the car. He started the engine to warm it up, and turned to Siana to ask if she was alright.

She nodded. Mikhalis spoke to her calmly, not wanting to alarm her unduly, but in order to make sure she realised the gravity of the situation.

"Not that gypsies are a menace or dangerous, but for anyone who lives hand to mouth, the slightest temptation may be hard to resist. I want you to be careful, Ana. There have been a few incidences of theft. There is no law against them coming into the building peacefully, but I don't like how they wouldn't give way to us. Especially the one with the crazy eyes."

Siana nodded, "I just thought letting them have what they asked for would discourage anything else they had on their mind. So I gave them the money."

"They may just come back for more. They may wander upstairs. It's not safe. I have to lock the front door and make sure the tenants keep it locked, rather than ajar as they like to do. I will tell the guests as well. Thank goodness for those boys. It made them decide to leave."

"Yes," said Siana, a little absently. Mikhalis watched as the boys and the rest of their company filed out onto the street, waiting as Mr Kim went to get the bus. Siana peered at them through the windscreen. Mikhalis noticed that Leo was watching them with worried eyes, or specifically her, presumably thinking he was under cover of darkness. He wondered how much that boy's concern was for both their safety, or more particularly for hers. He looked at Siana, who didn't seem to notice she was being watched. Her eyes were on the bus.

"It's a glorified van. I wonder why they didn't get something a little more luxurious? They don't need all that space. I think it seats about 15 people." She murmured.

"Probably to stay under the radar. Not to draw too much attention to themselves. Also, they had enough luggage to fill the back rows of seats," Mikhalis responded, putting the car into drive and moving out towards the centre of town. He felt Leo's eyes follow them, and he wondered how such a delicately-featured man managed to put off such a strong vibe. The man had used his thin but muscular frame to dominate the situation with his attitude and his posture, and MIkhalis could feel a certain powerful vibe emanating from him as he strode past them to make sure the gypsies knew in no uncertain terms that they were not welcome.

Mikhalis got the strongest feeling that Leo was protective, even possessive in nature. He sensed that there was more to his handling of the situation than common decency, and he looked at Siana out of the corner of his eyes. She sat staring into the darkness outside, her eyes glazed over as they followed the outlines of the landscape under dim streetlights.

This first drive together after her arrival was usually taken with excitement each year, but tonight Siana was subdued, thoughtful.

"Did that shock you or scare you?" he asked her tentatively.

"No, I really am okay. And don't worry, I will take care to be safe," Siana said gently. Mikhalis wanted to lift her spirits and take her mind off what had happened.

"Are you excited to start the choreography?" He asked. At that, Siana perked up.

"Yes! Oh god, dad, it's going to be awesome! They're both really good dancers, one is more classically trained, the other is more street, but you know what, it doesn't really matter because they bring their own style into it and make it all blend together well-" she suddenly realised she was going on too much and laughed at her dad's patient expression.

"Sorry, I'm just fangirling," Siana said.

"When I was speaking to them I got the impression that despite their youth, they have an amazing capacity for focus, and a great work ethic. I can understand your obsession with them. Because they are so hardworking. Respectful. Polite." MIkhalis said, jokingly. Siana giggled.

"Yes, those are EXACTLY the reasons why I love them so much, Dad!"

Siana loved that she and her dad could use sarcasm to acknowledge her rather less honourable reasons for loving the group without actually have to say things about the boys' looks, bodies and moves. Because it certainly wasn't their professional diligence that got her excited about them in the first place!

Siana remembered coming across the Error music video during her early enjoyment of kpop. She was totally into girls groups with their cute choreography at the time, but when Leo's other-worldly face flashed across the screen she literally yelped and restarted the clip.

Who was this heavenly creature?

It wasn't so much about looks, because there were days when he would look just like any other person, or even seemed distinctly plain. His high cheekbones could look puffy. His upturned eyes could look small and expressionless. He slouched a lot, and often seemed physically exhausted. His eyes sometimes darted around nervously. He had flat hair days too.

But for Siana, it was never really a boy's looks that she found attractive. It was that thing, that feel, that something else that each person had. Their own personal charm, their inner being. It had to do with their expressions, their actions. Actions said more to her than words, because they were immediate expressions of the self.

When it came to Leo, it was the turn of his head, the way he seemed self-conscious of his smile, the way he was reluctant to be seen as cute. Perhaps it was because he grew up the youngest boy in a family of girls, she thought. That would be enough fodder for kids to tease a gentle child already. Maybe he developed a belief that men had to be a certain way to be real men, and felt self-conscious when his true gentle self threatened to reveal itself.

This was the story about him that she built for herself.

Siana smirked. A gentle man trying to maintain macho, but joining a group like Vixx, where they were all about fantasy, drama and blurred sexual lines.

She had enjoyed watching his tight self-control unravel in public, under the influence of the boys around him, and probably under the influence of fans and public treatment. She thought it would be ignorant of him not to acknowledge himself as a desirable man when thousands of girls loved him no matter how much the macho facade was pulled away.

Siana realised she was smiling to herself like a silly girl. She cleared her throat and looked to see Mikhalis glancing over at her.

"You finished daydreaming?" he asked, leaning away as she tried to smack him.

"DAD! Oh god, you're worse than mum!" she whined.

She had been caught fangirling by her dad too many times in one day, and it made her cringe. Although she was happy that she didn't really have to hide it from him, and he didn't REALLY judge her for it.

 

**

 

They reached Delphi, and drove through the town almost to the end of it, where the statue of Prometheus stood. There, they made a sharp turn to follow a parallel road back the way they came, it being a one-way system through the tiny town.

The road rose sharply and at the apex Mikhalis found a parking spot on the road. They walked a few steps to Vakhos and went in.

Mikhalis went straight into the kitchen to look for his old friend while Siana walked to the back of the restaurant and out onto a spacious verandah which was built to take advantage of the beautiful view of the Amfissian plains - which stretched south towards the sea where she could see Itea's twinkling lights. Except for a couple dining near the front of the shop, it was still empty having just opened for the evening's business.

The verandah hung over the buildings below, but seemed to hang right over a precipice, since they were located high above the road. They had covered the verandah with clear plastic blinds to keep the cold out, but a flap had been rolled up for ventilation. She walked there and leaned on the verandah railing, feeling like she was suspended in the air above a landlocked cliff. She took a deep breath, finally feeling some relief after the tense situation back home.

She could hear some business going on behind her as her dad chatted with the owner, and they started arranging tables to accommodate their large party. Mikhalis was ordering ahead of the boys' arrival so that food would be ready sooner.

Siana felt a little out of sorts. The day had been long, but she felt suddenly hyper, and antsy. She was sure she was feeling the effects of adrenaline pumping through her system, from the shock of her encounter.

The situation at home earlier had unsettled her, and she began to feel that feeling she got in her body when she needed to go for a run, or exercise and sweat. She shook her head. Besides her run and dancing that morning, she had played basketball and knocked over a pop idol. Surely she had had enough for the day?

But the feeling was still there, and had an edge to it that she was unfamiliar with. Perhaps it was just the adrenaline. The tense situation called for an emergency response. And because she had maintained her control, there had been no real outlet for that nervous tension. Afterwards, the shock had settled in, making her a little subdued as she thought of the potential danger they had been in. Those men could have had a knife, or been violent.

She dismissed the notion that she was truly in physical danger. The gypsies seemed dangerous, but they had posed no actual threat. What felt ominous was that they seemed to be scoping out the place, and had felt the need to trespass in order to do so. They could return at any time, and as her father said, could venture upstairs.

She felt sad that this kind of world was creeping into the blissful, peaceful world of Itea that she had always known. She also felt sad that there were people less fortunate than her, unable to live normally and resorting to begging or worse to get by. But mostly she felt like there was a pent-up energy deep inside her, like a shout that never got a chance to be screamed.

She felt a presence behind her, and she turned to find Hongbin standing there, looking out into the darkness with her. He looked down, and smiled a little.

"Are you okay?" he asked. "You look a bit shaken up."

She nodded, suddenly feeling tears welling up. She was taken by surprise, since she didn't feel sad or scared. She blinked them away quickly and turned her face back to look out into the night. Hongbin noticed and quietly asked if she would rather he asked her father to come see to her. She shook her head.

"It's okay, it's just a touch of hysteria," she said, laughing a little nervously, putting both hands up to her face and pushing back her hair. She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, feeling the tears subside and taking a deep breath. She could feel the scream rise up in her throat and fall away as her deep, long breath began to calm her down.

It was like a delayed effect. The shock she thought she should have felt at the scene only came into effect now, almost an hour after. She saw Hongbin watching her, deadly serious.

"Please don't worry about me, I am fine. Honestly, if you don't cheer up you will make me cry for real," she said to him. He immediately flashed those dimples and nodded. He looked around to see who else had noticed, only to find Leo glaring at him from the front door. Hongbin turned back quickly, his smile fading.

"More reason for him to hate me right now," he said to himself.

"Sorry?" Siana asked, as she looked around to see whom Hongbin was referring to. She saw everyone had filed in, and noticed Leo nonchalantly taking off his coat as he walked over to the table, his eyes down. She looked back to see Hongbin was looking at Leo too, with a smirk on his face. She wondered what had happened. Hongbin looked at her, and gestured towards the table.

"Shall we go sit down?"

She nodded, turning to go first.

She sat next to her dad, who was at one end of the table. Opposite her was Leo, then next to him Hongbin, Ravi and Ken. On her side, next to her sat N and Hyuk whilst Min Seok and Mr Kim took the last seats at the other end, Mr Kim sitting opposite her father. Before they had settled, the wait staff had brought carafes of water and retsina, baskets of bread, plates of greek salad and local greens boiled and dressed in olive oil and lemon juice.

They must have been hungry, because she saw pieces of bread being broken off and dipped into the olive oil and forkfuls of salad and greens being placed on their eating plates. The simple food was delicious, tasty, what the Greeks called nostimo.

She took a mouthful of bread dipped in oil and forked a piece of feta in after it.

After a year of not tasting this food, it felt like heaven in her mouth, and she turned to her father with a smile. What was it about food, and memories, and comfort? He smiled back, both of them sentimental for a moment, and reached a hand out to her cheek, rubbing his thumb across her cheekbone.

She leaned into his gentle touch and closed her eyes, happy. The tension in her body seemed to melt away, and she felt a deep love for her dad, having missed him for so long, and not really recognising that fact until that moment, after a busy and eventful day.

She had tears in her eyes when she opened them to look at him, but the tears were from a happy and nostalgic place. Mikhalis also started to well up, and they both started nodding at each other, a little self-consciously, a little wryly, like a couple of clownish kids just acknowledging that they were sentimental fools to each other.

Finally they laughed, and Mikhalis chucked her on the chin before raising his glass to the table. As she picked up her glass too, she saw that Leo was looking at her with eyes that were like pools of darkness, unfathomable, and deeply engrossed in the exchange between her and her father. He nodded politely with his glass upraised as well, then turned to listen to Mikhalis make a toast.

"To our guests, welcome. After tonight's events, your presence here has gone from being a business arrangement, to something else for me, and I am sure for my Siana too. I am grateful to you two boys for helping us earlier, thank you. Here's to new friends, and new graces."

The others smiled and cheered, and Hongbin piped up to say thank you and that they just happened to turn up at the right moment. He joked that it seemed like Miss Siana had everything under control, and that he was glad that all was well.

She began to smell lamb roasting, and it whetted her appetite.

She sat quietly, just listening to the chatter around her, not really noticing what was beingsaid, and not noticing that Leo was silent too.

 

**

 

Leo had ridden up to Delphi in troubled silence.

He thought back to the moment he came down the stairs with Hongbin and realised that Siana and her father were in a bit of a situation. Hongbin had acted immediately, stepping in to break the tension, but he himself had hung back, unsure of how he could help.

He had glanced at Siana as she had answered Hongbin's question in a steady voice, and had seen a look of determined calm in her eyes, which told him that she had the situation under her control.

He recognised that she was steeling herself for the possibility of a bad reaction from the two vagrants who had come in to the apartment lobby. They weren't threatening, but they had an air of danger about them. He thought perhaps because the one who had leaned in close to her seemed a little unhinged, and unpredictable.

She could be close to attack by a madman, or just being stood too close to by someone a little light in the head.

When they decided to leave, he found himself walking forward menacingly, a strength and power imbuing his strides with the threat of violence. He knew that he could give off an impression of danger, or latent violence, and often found that that served him well, usually on the playing field - or on the stage.

Even so, he felt ineffective and a little over-dramatic, and wished he had been more forthcoming about his concern for Siana.

He had watched her get into her car, chatting with her dad as if nothing had happened, and wondered if he could ever really be able to care for someone who seemed to have so little need to be looked after.

She didn't seem to need help from anyone. What do you give someone who doesn't need anything from anyone?

Leo thought that the world was a clear cut place, where if you did the right thing and worked hard, your life would pan out as you wished it to. He believed that, ultimately, after all the fanfare of celebrity, after he finally set himself up for life, his purpose was to have a family and be someone that could be depended upon.

Someone who could bring happiness to his loved ones.

Dating was sporadic since he started working, but relationships with girls always seemed to take the same route: the girlier, the needier, the better the fit someone was for him. After all, it fit with his life goal, didn't it, to have someone who needed him more than he needed her?

But there had always been something missing, and eventually relationships would fizzle out. He thought that it was a side-effect of being ambitious. He had no time to care for someone properly, even before he became an idol. You couldn't become an idol if you valued your relationships and your personal space over the group's. If you eventually went solo, it was because your obsession with self-expression and success went beyond that of the group you were with in the first place.

Just now he had come face to face with the idea that maybe someone he was interested in, might just not need him or even reciprocate his interest.

It was an alarming prospect, and more than a little depressing. He might be able to dazzle his way into any girl's heart, but now he wondered, could he really satisfy this particular one's needs?

Seeing Siana handle herself so well, even when she could have let her father defend the situation and her, sent a clear message to Leo: if she were to choose him, it wouldn't be because he could fight her fights for her, or care for her, or do things for her.

That was what scared him the most: what could he offer her if she didn't need all those things?

He suddenly realised that he was thinking of her as a potential mate. He shook his head and nibbled at his lower lip. Why was he thinking like that, getting so caught up in her?

Next to him on the bus, Hongbin was chatting to N, explaining what had happened before the rest of them had come down.

"I'm glad nothing bad happened. Ooo, she has guts. She will be perfect for our routine, won't she be, Ravi-ssi?"

Ravi uhuh-ed as he turned around in his seat to look back at Hongbin and N. Leo's eyes darted to N.

"What routine?" he asked.

"I asked Siana to help me choreograph a routine for concert. It will be about a love triangle between me, her and Ravi here."

Leo felt the blood rise inside him. He immediately had to talk himself out of the sudden bad mood that he felt threatening to overtake him.

Touching, handling, sweating, breathlessness.

These were all normal parts of dance routines.

Why on earth would it bother him that she would be dancing with both N and Ravi?

He looked at Ravi from under hooded eyes. With that nose, that chiselled jaw and those puppy eyes, he was a study in contrasts. He was creative, but hard and driven. He worked out and had a body that was so lean it was wiry and taut all over - and yet, his persona was that of a boy-child, constantly sunny, always adoring of others. People thought he was awkward around girls, but the reality was, he simply wasn't interested. The music, the collaboration, the creativity - that was what drove him. Among the group, there was no pressure to be more than brotherly, and he enjoyed feeling at ease with them because there was no expectation to be sexy or caring, as girls often had when they were around him.

But right now, Leo could only think of him holding Siana, or worse, her holding him. He clenched his fist involuntarily. He didn't notice Hongbin looking at him for a moment, then turning back to N, who was continuing.

"I was supposed to be the good guy and Ravi the bad guy. He was supposed to steal her away from me by being sexy and seductive. Then I would save her from him. But after I heard about her bravery, I got inspired. I think it would be better to see that she doesn't let herself get forced into a game of hearts by us. Ravi-ssi, what do you think if she ends up rejecting us both?"

Ravi's eyes lit up. "I love it."

"Maybe she should punish you both for fighting over her and disregarding her," Hyuk shouted from the front. Leo saw Ravi's look of excitement as he and N dropped their mouths open together and gasped dramatically.

"WHIPS!" they exclaimed at the same time, before collapsing into laughter. Hongbin rolled his eyes as N grabbed his arm to shake him back and forth in sheer happiness.

"Wow, our minds are one!" said N, to which Hongbin replied under his breath, "Leave my mind out of it."

"Why can't I dance too?" Leo heard Ken pipe up from next to Ravi.

Ravi turned back to face front so he could see Ken properly.

"Awww," he said, his rubbly voice suddenly cooing over Ken, "It's okay if we don't dance together, so don't miss me, I still love you."

"Not you!" Ken yelled in his high pitched lady voice. "Why can't I dance with Siana too?"

Everyone answered together, "No."

Hyuk snickered from the front.

"Ken-hyung, it wouldn't be believable."

"Is it because of my nose? Is it my ears?" Ken whined, making Ravi and Hyuk giggle.

"If those were the problem they would have been doubly fixed long ago," Hongbin said matter-of-factly.

"Yeah, the problem is you," N said, patronisingly.

Ravi chuckled louder. Ken play-whacked Ravi on the chest, making Ravi giggle even harder.

"If you damage that chest, we will lose a tonne of starlights, stop, Ken, STOP!" N said in a deep growl that surprised Leo. Just as quickly as that growling masculinity appeared, N's gentle matronly manner reappeared. Leo didn't know how he did it, but it always seemed to drive their fans crazy.

They reached the restaurant and Min Seok dropped them off before driving further along to find a flat area to park the bus.

Hongbin went in with N and Hyuk first, whilst Ravi and Ken waited for Min Seok with Kkomae.

Leo looked into the restaurant before he went in, and saw Siana standing at the far end, looking out of the balcony with her back to them all. To his surprise, he saw Hongbin make a beeline directly to her, and start talking to her.

Leo stepped into the restaurant to see better. He saw Siana put her hands over her face, and then it looked like she was wiping away tears.

It irked him so bad that at the very moment when strong, independent Siana was feeling vulnerable, it was Hongbin who had stepped up first to see to her, not him.

He was just way-behind, too-late, un-noticing Leo, and he was angry at himself for it.

He saw Hongbin turn around, and they met eyes for a moment, before Hongbin turned back. Leo saw that Siana was turning around to see who Hongbin was looking at, and out of habit Leo looked away, pretending to walk toward the table as if he had been all along, taking off his coat.

He felt angry at himself for always missing his cue. He made a conscious decision that he would not miss any more opportunities to be there for Siana.

He was determined that if Siana was to fall for anyone, it would be him.

Not steadfast Hongbin.

Not cheerful N or Hyuk.

Not charismatic Ravi.

And certainly not fucking cutie Ken.

 

**

 

N was one of those people who looked at the world with a mild dictatorial benevolence.

He liked things to be just the way he liked them to be, but he was flexible and humble enough to recognise that he didn't own anyone - he just liked to act that way.

And mostly, people enjoyed his firm but gentle leadership, and he tended to get excellent results from simply taking charge in a courteous manner.

But when it came to variables, like character quirks and stubborn streaks in others, he often had to throw his hands up in despair. This was when he relied on his fellow idols to step in where they could and pour oil over troubled waters.

N liked to be straightforward, and he didn't feel ashamed of who he was or of his feelings - which he was happy to put out there when he felt like it. If he did it in a less tolerable way, he realised he would not be the good leader that he was. He had found a way to use humour and being the "fall guy" to disperse tensions and allay fears.

Still. Dealing with someone like Taekwoon could wear him down sometimes.

It was obvious to N that somewhere between having dinner last night and having dinner tonight, Taekwoon's cheery, playful and soft spirit had gone back into the cave that he and the boys had spent years trying to coax it out of.

He was practically glowering at the lamb chops on his plate.

He looked at Hongbin, who seemed to be hovering around Leo the whole day and evening. Perhaps Hongbin had caused this situation? N narrowed his eyes and pursed his lips. He thought not. Hongbin had too pragmatic a head on his shoulders to cause this kind of withdrawal in Leo. He didn't normally like to play games, although N knew that Hongbin had the head for it.

He looked further down the table to Ravi and Ken, who were all but sitting in each other's laps, they were so touchy-feely. N was never surprised when people assumed at some point, that some or all of Vixx were gay. He was rather proud of their crossover appeal, to both the gay community - and the hetero community who wished that Vixx were gay.

N was more shocked that young teens were so sexually-minded, when he felt that he was just beginning to understand what sexuality was. Of course, everyone understands what sex is and what being a boy or a girl is. But really, really understanding sexuality and its many layers, it's many definitions... there were limits and non-limits people had that N could never really presume to know.

All he knew was that from a young age he was highly sociable, a total leader and absolutely fabulous.

And both the girls and boys loved him.

He didn't discriminate. Everyone's adoration was better than just someone's adoration.

His mother encouraged his confidence and taught him how to deal with his low moments, so that he would always be able to care for himself even if he were alone in the world. He had always gone headlong towards his goal: to be a good person, and a good leader in whatever he did - which was dancing and singing.

He wasn't a songwriter, and had no aspirations to be. He had less of a hand in conceptualising their comebacks, but was always hands-on in the practical staging.

He knew what he could bring to the table, and he made sure everyone knew too. It was clearcut.

But people like Taekwoon? And other people's sexuality? N drew a blank. Nothing straight up in either of those things.

N chewed on the delicious food as his eyes scanned the rest of the table for the sources of Leo's black character rennaissance. It couldn't be Kkomae or Hyuk, since he had spent most of the day with them. He turned to Mr Mikhalis.

Perhaps it was the thing that happened with the gypsies? But Taekwoon had been out of sorts since before that, especially after he had come back from basketball with Hongbin and Siana.

N's eyes darted to Siana as he gasped dramatically to himself.

Could it be?

He looked at Leo, and found him to be staring down Siana as she chewed quietly on her food.

Then he glanced at Hongbin and caught him watching him with an expression of "Do you see what I see?"

Hongbin lifted his glass as N reached for his, and they both looked at each other over their glasses as they drank. So Hongbin knew something about Leo and Siana - and N was guessing that it wasn't about how well they played basketball.

N raised his eyebrows at Hongbin, who widened his eyes as if to say "You don't know the half of it!"

This piqued N's interest no end. Taekwoon? Falling for Siana?

Oh, the joy! N loved happy things - but from the way he looked, Taekwoon in love seemed to be like it was a hellhole of misery.

He decided that Taekwoon needed testing, which in N's opinion was the best way to bring out a person's best. However, knowing his reluctant side, N knew that the wrong move would make him totally withdraw out of pride or embarrassment.

He wondered if his asking Siana to work with him and Ravi was a sticking point for Leo. He realised it very well could be, even though he knew Leo would deny it, or even reject an opportunity to dance with her himself. He wasn't straightforward like that. He was like a crab that could only move sideways, all hard and prickly on the outside, but pretty much soft and boneless on the inside.

Everyone in the group knew that once you got over the initial fear of Taekwoon's grumpy outer being, he was putty in your hands, eager to be there for you, happy to be needed.

He turned to Siana, who looked up and turned her attention to him before he started talking. He loved that little gesture of acknowledgment as it made him think she was attentive to people's needs.

"Siana-ssi, is there a club we could go to? to listen to music, to dance?" N put a forkful of food in his mouth and chewed as he politely waited for her to answer.

Siana looked at him blankly.

N felt rather than saw the boys' surprise. N rarely wanted to go out, let alone to the clubs - none of them did.

"You mean, tonight?" she almost squeaked.

"Yes, tonight," he replied. He could see something light up in her eyes as she thought it through, and she smiled at him. He smiled back, almost conspirationally. They were on the same wavelength. In the club, it was all about expression. It was about connection with each other.

N recognised a kindred spirit who loved how dance could bring people - even strangers - together, whether for an instant, or for a night, or for a lifetime.

He knew that she understood that on the dancefloor, for them at least, they could become someone they normally weren't: they could be free, they could flirt and tease, they could cajole and reject... all for the sake of a feeling.

An elation. A connection.

For him, and he suspected for Siana too, that connection was all he needed - or wanted. The follow-through was too real and messy for him. There was nothing glamorous about real-life relationships. Eventually, relationships lost their lustre as the drudgery of the everyday took over.

On the dance-floor, a look could be loaded, a hand could wander almost too close, or proximity could be intimate, almost unbearably so - but it all stayed on the dance-floor once the music ended.

By the look in Siana's eye, she understood that deeply.

"You know why, don't you?" N asked. Siana sort of nodded through her smile, which she was trying to suppress.

"Why?" Mr Mikhalis asked, perplexed.

"So we can try each other out on the dance floor, so to speak," said N, matter-of-factly. Loudly.

Hongbin coughed into his drink.

N blinked, looking around the table to see if he had had the desired effect. Mikhalis put his fork down with a clang, turning to Siana to say in Greek, "Well, that is exactly what a father wants to hear."

Hongbin leaned over to Mr Mikhalis and said in a placatory tone, "I think he means-"

"I know what he means," Mikhalis said through clenched teeth as he turned to Hongbin with a killer look. Hongbin immediately cast his eyes down and sat back up straight.

Siana giggled at them both. Mikhalis turned his glare on her. She looked up at him with soft smiling eyes.

"Dad, it's just dancing. Performance. Fantasy. Right, N?"

She turned to look at him. N nodded neatly, a paragon of virtue. She nodded also, and turned back to Mikhalis with a tightlipped smile and innocent eyes. Before she could say anything else, N butted in.

"Mr Mikhalis, I can assure you it's worse in the rehearsal room," N said, again trying to be matter of fact.

N noticed Leo reacting in almost the same way as Mr Mikhalis, his eyes almost rolling back in his head as he restrained himself from banging on the table. It was all the confirmation N needed. Leo had a vested interest in Siana.

He knew he just had to get her on the dance-floor. And Leo had to be there too.

She was obviously game for it, and while he didn't really frequent clubs, he loved the dance-floor, be it in a nightclub, onstage or in the rehearsal room.

"Worse?"

Mr Mikhalis leaned forward as if very interested in what N had to say. Leo put his elbows on the table and steepled his fingers in front of his face, barely containing his discontent. If looks could kill, he was murdering N several times over.

Siana reached out a hand and touched her father's arm lightly.

"In the rehearsal room it's worse because we have to think of things technically. We have to worry about what it looks like and whether it is safe."

"Safe?" Mikhalis practically chirped.

"If there is a lift or a spin, we have to do it safely as well as make it look good. So, there is lots of repetition, with lots of holding and gripping and you know what I mean," Siana smiled at her dad, who seemed to understand.

Siana continued, "If you like, you can join us at the club. We won't be doing anything I wouldn't want you to see."

N nodded, although he hoped she was bluffing. She continued.

"I can take them to Uncle Stratos' place outside Kyrra, if you prefer. Panos and Yianni will come too if I ask them."

N watched Mr Mikhalis visibly relax. He noticed Leo seemed to relax too, but perhaps he was more suspicious of his brothers, having a particular concern for Siana.

Mr Mikhalis stuck his chin out belligerently, not knowing what to say or do. He glanced at Leo, whose face he examined. Leo seemed to be trying to keep the vein in his forehead from exploding.

He looked at Siana and jerked his head in Leo's direction, suddenly speaking to Siana in Greek.

"He hates the idea as much as I do. I tell you what, I will let you go as long as he goes too," and with that he called to the waiter for dessert.

Siana's face reddened so deeply she felt she could heat up the air around her. She couldn't help but glance at Leo, who now looked curious because of her sudden change in expression.

"Dad, we don't have to go out, it was just a suggestion-"

Mikhalis interrupted her to speak to the table in English.

"You all go out together, as long as Panos and Yianni join you. All of you. That is the condition."

The boys, all observing the tense situation, chimed in together, saying "Yes," and bowing without thinking. This seemed to placate Mr Mikhalis, who took a deep breath and let out a gentle sigh.

"Please, enjoy the food. I would like to treat you all tonight as my guests, and as gentlemen who were there for us when we needed them," he nodded toward Leo and Hongbin, who murmured about it being coincidental. Mikhalis brushed off their protests.

"Well, Siana can obviously take care of herself," he said, looking her steadfastly in the eye, "but it's nice to know there are people who are willing to be there for her. For us, I mean."

Mr Kim at the end of the table raised some objections, but Mikhalis stood his ground. The boys all thanked him profusely, eating up their fill of lamb chops, a variety of salads and cooked vegetables, and some homestyle fries. Mikhalis realised he was the only one drinking so he ordered cola for the others when the dessert arrived.

Dessert was a large platter of stewed and roasted stone fruit, smothered in thick, creamy yoghurt and drizzled with thyme honey, cinnamon powder and pistachio nuts. The various dishes were flavourful and rich, but Mikhalis had ordered only one main, and the rest were sides, knowing that a too-heavy meal at night would leave them unhappily full in the aftermath. He had loaded up on the vegetables, and while the dessert was very tasty, it was still light on the palate.

They fell to eating diligently, clearing the dishes quickly. As they sat idly chatting, Mr Mikhalis stood up and went to the balcony to stretch his legs.

N immediately got up and followed suit, which surprised Siana and made her more than a little worried. N seemed to have been unnecessarily provocative in his choice of words when speaking to her dad, and she wondered if he had any ulterior motive, since she knew that it might be considered rude if they were back in Asia or in Korea.

It being Greece, there were few cultural expectations with regards to the treatment of seniors. Here, you could consider other people of any age, even much older, to be your equal. Whilst respect for seniors was traditional, the meeting of similar minds set the tone for the equality, rather than the predilection of the senior-most person.

She involuntarily looked at Leo, who had been giving her the stank-eye all night over dinner. He was now peering into his empty plate, chewing on his lower lip thoughtfully.

She liked the way that looked.

Still, she felt perplexed and a little hot under the collar. Hadn't they parted on good terms after they got home that evening? Had she done something wrong or offended him somehow?

It had been his angry face that had convinced Mikhalis to let her go. She suddenly felt a surge of anger herself. She was now of age, but she had been going to Uncle Stratos' club since she was sixteen, with her father's blessing. He knew she went there to dance, not to drink or do drugs or pick up guys or get picked up by guys, even though others there did.

Why was her dad suddenly so put out by the thought? And why could she only go because Leo was going? She resented that her dad had somehow dismissed her independence and between him and Leo they seemed to decide they would LET her go.

She took a deep breath, trying to calm her anger. She knew her dad cared for her, but didn't he trust her? Why then, did he make a big deal out of this thing?

She realised it was definitely to do with N's way of putting forth the idea. He had to have done it on purpose, to get a rise out of her dad.

Oh yeah, it's because we are supposed to do the choreography about a three-way love between myself and N and Ravi.

She supposed that as her father, Mikhalis could possibly have a hard time dealing with that.

She turned to look at N who was speaking very politely, but animatedly to her dad at the balcony. Hyuk had joined them and was helping the conversation along with his better English. Her dad looked weary from the verbal wall of sound that was coming at him.

She smiled. N was killing him with politeness and conscientious assurances.

She turned back, with her smile still on her lips, to lock eyes with Leo.

Her eyes widened in surprise, as he leaned forward, with a determined set to his jaw. She noticed Hongbin trying not to listen.

"What did your father say that made you... uncomfortable?"

Siana swallowed. Oh please no, don't ask me that.

There was an edge to his tone, and it seemed like he wasn't sure if he really wanted to hear the answer. She realised perhaps it had sounded like he was being criticised by her father, when in fact, it was the opposite. But how she wished he had been criticised so that she wouldn't have to expose herself with the truth.

She swallowed drily as she took in those pretty eyes under angled eyebrows that gave them a penetrating gaze. She couldn't tell if he was angry now. She thought he was just curious, or perhaps slightly pissed off. She had a terrible, tempting urge to reach out and touch his face, he looked so intensely, handsomely interested in her.

Siana, he is interested in your answer, not you, she thought to herself. Snap out of it!

She took a moment to think of how she could answer truthfully without revealing the real reason for her reaction.

She couldn't help it: her gaze dropped to his lips, and stayed there as she opened her mouth to speak.

But no words came out. She was entranced. Those full lips, rosy from eating, were slightly pursed as he waited for her to answer. He had a perfectly formed cupid's bow, but even while the lips were pretty, the underlying muscle in his mouth and chin made them firm, and gave them a determined set. His lower lip was full, biteable and formed a pleasing shape under that top lip.

Siana gasped, realising her mouth was open. Her eyes fluttered up to meet his, and she struggled to find words. He seemed taken in by her, and he sat back, clearing his throat. Hongbin leaned forward.

"Perhaps it was private, Siana-ssi? Maybe she doesn't want to answer, hyung."

Leo looked down, turning his head towards Hongbin as if to listen, then he looked back at Siana in questioning. Siana just didn't want to lie, but Hongbin was giving her a way out.

"He.. He said he trusted you two because you helped us earlier," she managed to blurt out. It was an almost-truth that covered all the bases.

Hongbin chuckled. "Well, I can understand how that would make you embarrassed. I feel embarrassed by it too. We don't deserve such extraordinary compliments. Really it was nothing. Right, hyung?"

Hongbin put a hand on Leo's knee, looking him in the eye as he waited. Ever so slightly, he exerted a comfortable pressure on Leo, who eventually nodded.

Without warning, he gave Siana a look that read, "I know that is not true."

His expression. It was as if he had been betrayed. She saw passion, abandonment, resentment in that look. It was almost as if she had the power to hurt him - and he was mad that she had it in her to do it.

Why would Leo, whom she had found an easy rapport with that afternoon, be so mad at her? Why give her that look as if her half-truth was a total betrayal?

She realised that something had changed almost immediately after the event in the lobby. He seemed angry with the way she had handled the two gypsies.

Why so? She was rather proud that she was doing well until the boys turned up and tipped the odds in their favour.

The way he had manfully strode after them and made sure they were well and truly gone. She liked the way he looked, and liked the way it made her feel even more.

She felt cared for, protected. It made her stomach flutter, to imagine for a moment that Leo wanted to keep her safe. In her dreams, Leo would want her to himself, and wouldn't stomach the idea of someone else taking care of her instead of him.

He would get angry, jealous, if he had to share her.

It suddenly occurred her that Leo's look was like a look of jealousy, as well as resentment.

It filled her with dread, making her heart skip a beat.

And it also gave her a tantalising thought:

 

Leo wants me.

 

Siana, get a hold of yourself!

 _Maybe_ Leo wants me.

 _It would be really something if_ Leo wanted me.

 _Wouldn't it be cool_ if a pop idol were to fall in love with me? Those were more accurate ways of thinking that errant thought.

Who was she kidding? ALL those thoughts made her insides churn.

But all she had were her thoughts and just interpretations of his actions. There was no real definitive action on his part that proved that he wanted her to be his.

She was seeing things that any fan who had alternately loved and lusted after her idol would naturally see, especially after spending only a few hours in close contact with him. But had he ever said anything? No. Had he really ever sought her out to be with her? Well... she couldn't tell if their hanging out together that day meant anything to him. It certainly meant a lot to her - but she could only presume to have been good company for him, that was all.

In real life, if Leo wasn't someone she had admired from afar, who was famous, gorgeous and now living in the room upstairs, would she feel the same way about him? If he was just some cute kid whom she had known for a day?

YES, Oh my god, YES, look at him, he's so beautiful! she screamed to herself internally.

A Serious Siana thought butted in: But can he make you happy?

Siana suppressed a giggle. She felt like she could skip to the balcony and do a running double flip into the darkness and start flying, that's how happy she thought she could be.

Then again, she was only thinking about the now. If she really looked ahead to an imaginary future together, she saw a bleak, heartbreaking tale of crossed cultures, long distances and bad exposure to the public.

She shivered. She didn't want to put her life on display. She was happy with her work, her small but meaningful and purposeful dreams, and her family and friends.

She chewed on some fruit. Just a day ago she was daydreaming on the flight over here that she had bumped into Vixx in her imaginary workplace, imagining Leo noticing her as they got into the cargo lift together. She smiled a little, thinking of how in her fantasy, Leo had leaned in towards her in the elevator, almost as if to kiss her, but had really played a silly trick on her by pressing all the numbers in the lift before getting out in time for the doors to close.

Her daydream had gone from full-fledged crushing on one hot idol, to being pranked, punked, and trolled by him.

She spooned a mouthful of honeyed yoghurt into her mouth, still smiling, as Hakyeon sat down in his seat again with a happy thud.

She turned to look at him questioningly. He smiled at her then looked down at her lips. Before she knew it, he had cupped her face with his hand and used his thumb to wipe at her upper lip.

Surprised, she used her napkin to dab at her mouth, just as N brought his thumb to his mouth and sucked the yoghurt and honey off it, smacking his lips loudly. She could only gape at N, surprised that he was quite casual about it. Well, some people were comfortable sharing this way, though she wasn't one to share things like spoons and straws with people she barely knew.

"Mmmm, that's delicious. Leo-ssi, have you tried some?" N smiled innocently at Leo, spooning some fruit into a small bowl. Leo seemed to be glowering at N as he held out the bowl to him.

Hyuk laughed. "So childish, N-hyung. Don't worry, Siana-ssi, he does this indirect kiss thing with everyone, including me. It's tiresome."

Siana laughed it off, but she saw Hongbin's eyes go wide as he locked eyes with Hyuk. He reached out to get the bowl that N was holding out to Leo, who was burning holes into N's irritatingly smiling face.

N continuted, speaking pointedly to Leo. "See, I've had some already. What are you waiting for? Or maybe you wanted some but were too shy to ask? Or have you already had some, Leo-ssi?" N seemed to be smiling, but Siana wasn't watching him.

She was perplexed to see a flush creep up Leo's neck and into his cheeks. She could hear N idly continue chattering as he served up another bowl. She felt a strange tension in the air, and it was hanging between N and Leo.

"It's rare to come across lovely things like this. You shouldn't be shy to have some. You must take the opportunity now, while you can. There won't be anything like this back home. "

N held the bowl out to Hongbin, all the while looking at Leo. "Hongbin-ssi? Would you like some?"

Hongbin seemed hesitant to take it, looking between N and Leo.

Suddenly Leo reached out and grabbed the bowl, placing it squarely in front of Hongbin.

"Your point?" Leo's voice had a dangerous edge to it. Siana couldn't bear the tension, and stepped in to try to placate him.

"But he's right. You won't find this anywhere else, it's a local delicacy. There would be nothing like this back home. It just wouldn't taste the same."

Siana felt all eyes on her. Hongbin seemed to be holding his breath. She thought she saw a vein pumping blood in Leo's temple as he turned to look at her with wolf eyes. She almost flinched, he looked like he was going to devour her.

What the heck was going on with these boys? They were so k-drama emo.

"Is something wrong? What's up?" She asked them all.

Mikhalis suddenly appeared by her side and put a hand on her shoulder as he sat down.

"Young N here is a playful fellow, isn't he? But I don't think all his friends appreciate his sense of humour. Me neither."

He smiled pointedly at N. N bowed, saying sorry with a smile.

Mikhalis turned to Leo and put a hand on his shoulder. Siana saw Leo's face soften and relax. He forgot all the previous tension and was responding to her father's gesture.

"But, N is right. We go through a life full of opportunity, but we don't take them because of our belief that maybe it's not ours, or we don't deserve it. But all we have to do is reach out to take that opportunity. That's what you mean, don't you, N?"

N nodded. Mikhalis continued.

"Did you think he meant something else?" Mikhalis waited patiently for Leo to answer.

Leo looked briefly at N before answering, "Yes I did."

Mikhalis didn't press him for an explanation, but simply nodded.

"I can see why and I think perhaps even that was deliberate on N's part. However, to avoid bloodshed, let 's believe he was speaking of loftier things."

Hongbin, Hyuk and N laughed as Leo nodded politely with his eyes downcast. He looked relieved that he was let off the hook, as if he didn't really want to explain what all the angst was about.

Siana, on the other hand, was feeling agitated. She felt increasingly like she was being locked out of a little boys' club where the boys spoke in silly coded language so that the girls couldn't understand what was going on.

She pouted into her yoghurt as she chased a grape around her bowl with her spoon.

She was going to have words with her dad tonight.

 

**

 

In the car, Mikhalis blasted cold air onto the windscreen to stop it fogging up. He noticed Siana's mood over dinner had been sombre, but now he felt that perhaps she was more irate. She was fidgeting, and kept sighing.

"Did the boys upset you?" he asked gently.

She propped her elbow on the car window sill and rested her chin on her hand, looking out into the darkness of the road.

When Siana didn't answer, he knew she was more than a little upset. He prattled on, hoping to give her time to settle herself.

"N came over to apologise for making me upset. He seems so flamboyant, but really he is surprisingly mature. It's funny, he said he was sorry that he had to involve me like that. Maybe it was some prank he was playing on me. Or you. Have they been rude to you?" Mikhalis asked suddenly, wondering if that was what was bothering Siana.

She shook her head before turning back to him.

"Was it just me who got the feeling that everyone was talking over my head?"

Mikhalis smiled.

"No it wasn't just you. They were definitely speaking about something only they understood. But it seemed like only N was really doing it. The others were a little unhappy about it, I think."

"What was that all about?"

"Ana, I think there were just some prior issues between the boys that N was referring to. He didn't want to embarrass them by being open about it."

"Well, it was obvious enough. It felt like they were talking about me behind my back. To my face."

Siana realised how funny that sounded. After a beat they both giggled. Mikhalis turned cautiously round one of many sharp bends in the road as it snaked down the face of the mountain.

"I called Stratos, he said the boys will be working at the club tonight. Are you sure you're okay with going out?"

Siana nodded, then fished out her phone as she chatted to her dad.

"I'm not sure what that is all about either, since we are supposed to start choreography tomorrow. It's not like we can't do this in the studio."

She typed in _See you guys later at the club?_ and sent it off to Panos. He replied with a fireworks emoji. They were soon travelling through the olive groves on flat ground.

"Are they drinkers?" Mikhalis asked.

"I suppose they do occasionally have a drink, but I guess they would be wary of getting drunk in public. I doubt that there is any danger of that being an issue, Dad."

"You know, grown men still act like boys when they're in groups. If things turn ugly you get Panos to send you home."

He reached the main road of Itea and drove til he saw the jetty with its now-lit christmas tree-shaped lights at the end of it. He turned left and drove all the way past Miami til he reached the neighbouring village of Kirra.

"Why would you say that?" Siana asked, in all curiosity. "Do you think it could be a problem?"

Mikhalis needed to choose his words wisely. During dessert he had felt strong animosity between Leo and N. Or rather, he felt N was not realising how far he was pushing Leo. It almost looked like N was baiting him for a reaction. Mikhalis didn't know for sure what that business was all about, but he was pretty certain that Leo was someone who would be difficult to get a rise out of like that.

Mikhalis was only guessing what it could be at the time when he tried to dissipate the tension by stepping in, and he was very glad that Leo had responded well to his interaction. Leo's behaviour the whole evening, from the moment he had stepped forward in the lobby til the moment he had let go of whatever animosity he had felt towards N, suggested to Mikhalis that he was a man with something to prove.

He liked Leo for his quiet presence, whose actions spoke louder than words. And, although he and N had started off on the wrong foot, Mikhalis had soon come to see N as someone very observant, responsible and caring. It was obvious to him that the boys were going through a process that was private to them, with N instigating some behaviour that Leo was not very happy about.

Mikhalis was sure that it had something to do with Siana.

And much as he trusted the newcomers to a certain extent to be gentlemen, he knew that between even the best of friends, good intentions disappeared under the sway of jealousy. He didn't want Siana mixed up in anything like that, but then she would be dealing with them for a good few weeks, and he knew he couldn't step in her place for her. He had to let her handle it, but he had made very sure she would be surrounded by her people.

Mikhalis sighed. He wondered if his parents ever felt like they were letting go so hard they would fall forever into an abyss. Which was how he felt now. He silently thanked them for letting him muddle his way through is life. His mistakes made him the man he was. And his successes gave him his courage and confidence.

He needed to allow Siana to handle this herself.

Or maybe what's really going on here is that I am the one doing the growing, and she already knows how to take care of herself. Mikhalis gave her a knowing smile.

"You're a big girl Siana. You know how to take care of yourself. Anyway, don't I say that to you all the time?"

Siana smiled, relieved. "Yeah, you do."

They reached the end of the road, which intersected with another coastal highway. Across from them on the other side was a driveway that led up into the hill, where they could see a small carpark in front of what looked like a school hall. It was an old event hall which Stratos had revived as a nightclub. It was this road that Siana had run to early that morning before turning onto the highway and going into the olive groves.

Mikhalis crossed the dark and empty highway and ascended the drive.

"Say hi to the cousins for me. Do you need to be picked up?" Mikhalis asked as she prepared to get out.

"If the night is a bust, Panos will bring me home. If all goes well, I will catch a lift with the Korean pop idol group Vixx."

She smiled at him and pecked him on the cheek.

"Don't worry, I'll be fine."

With that, she got out of the car.

 

**

 

Leo strode into the club a few steps behind the rest of the boys, practically seething.

He had sat alone during the ride down. At first, he had been calm, thinking on what Mr Mikhalis had said. He got the feeling that Mr Mikhalis was sensing a fight coming on at the dinner table and tried to calm him down, and he appreciated the gesture, because it was like the irritable static in his body had been discharged from him.

And, Mr Mikhalis was right.

Leo had felt such a surge of anger listening to N that he thought he would lose all control.

He was annoyed that N had put two and two together about him and Siana and then had started pushing him for a reaction. It made him appreciate Hongbin's delicate handling of the matter earlier that day. However, Hongbin himself was at a loss when it came to lending a hand in the face of N's onslaught.

Leo was mad at himself for not being quick enough to laugh it off or distract N. But it was becoming more and more obvious that N was discussing Siana as if she represented some opportunity to be taken advantage of.

Leo was glad that Siana didn't seem to realise N was referring to her. And he hoped that further down the table, the others didn't notice what was going on.

During the ride down, his anger seemed to resurge, at a slow burn. The others sat in front, Ravi and Ken groaning over the delicious food that they had eaten, whilst N, Hyuk and Hongbin talked about the pretty twinkling lights of the couple of townships they saw along the way.

Now, as he walked into the darkened club, the thumping bass seemed to match his heartbeat. He felt a familiar shiver run down his spine as the hairs on his arms stood up. He felt like he was onstage, facing an audience that was going wild for him. This was the effect music had on him: the anticipation of drama, the heightened expectations of attitude and fantasy that Vixx brought to the stage.

There was something about music that could bring out the beast in him, and it only seemed to happen when the music was playing.

He had realised early in his career that there was something in his expression that was very charismatic during performance. Growing up, he often put off acquaintances and colleagues with his supposedly grumpy expression. He always thought he was just staring blankly into space, but it seemed that his features were set in such a way that he looked more fierce or aggressive than he really was. He certainly wasn't a confrontative person, so he spent a lot of time being bewildered by his alienating aura.

Once he began performing, and figuring out what worked for the camera and what didn't, he found the less he did the more reaction he got. Viewers would see what they came to see - and Vixx's particular brand of highly stylised pop, laced with a hint of kink, coupled with his expression, served to imbue his onstage character with an enigmatic flair that he felt he really didn't possess off the stage.

But here - tonight, after a long eventful day full of emotional ups and downs, and in a club that was almost full, atop a hill facing the sea, in the winter far away from home, where somewhere in the crowd was a girl with eyes that penetrated into his soul - he felt as if his heart was beating with a new pulse.

So this was what drew people to the clubs. Not just the music, not just the dancing, but the possibility of something... happening.

He searched the room for any sign of Siana. He saw Hakyeon wave to someone and made out the tall figure of Panos who was dancing in the throng across the room. He noticed more than a few faces turn and stare at the six tall unfamiliar men as they made their way forward.

His eyes adjusted to the chasing lights, and he waved absently back at Panos as he scanned the crowd. He finally recognised the jacket Siana had been wearing and stepped closer to see better.

In the warmth of the club, she had tied up her hair in a high ponytail and had let her jacket fall off her shoulders and hang in the crook of her elbows as she danced with no one in particular. Her figure-hugging turtleneck emphasised the her trim waist, and he couldn't help admiring her beautiful body. He paused to admire her free and easy style as she danced for herself, getting into her own groove. He thought wryly, at least here I can watch without hiding myself.

Leo felt that he was born for the stage, but for the life of him could not find it in himself to feel free on the dance-floor.

He noticed Ravi and Ken immediately getting into the music, which was a heavy RnB track, looking cool and definitely feeling the vibe. Hongbin and Hyuk hung back, but N unhesitatingly stepped up to Siana, who when she noticed him, gave him such a welcoming smile Leo felt his mood darken again immediately.

N didn't normally listen to this kind of music, but he certainly knew how to dance to it. He approached Siana, and Leo could see that she was looking into his eyes as he did so. N must have changed his expression because she suddenly gasped and laughed, biting her lower lip and reaching out to him with her hands. He grabbed them for a moment, then let go as they both laughed.

It was a talent N had. He had this ability to take something potentially cheesy or embarrassing, whether it was a situation on a variety show, or some retro dance move or gesture, and suddenly flip it into something sexy, masculine or mysterious. No matter how motherly he was, or naggy or nitpicky, N always ended up on top when it came to portraying charisma on the stage. And in an instant, N had won Siana's favour on the dance floor, even though earlier he had been the cause of her distress at the dinner table.

Not that she knew that.

It grated on Leo to stand by and watch as Hakyeon danced with Siana with an easy comfortable sexiness. They smiled at each other and turned to each other, opening up their bodies with dance moves that brought them close together without them touching.

Panos was also enjoying himself, and danced next to them unselfconsciously, watching them sometimes and then turning to others on the dance floor. He motioned to them to come join in, and Hyuk went forward a little hesitantly, eventually getting into it too.

Leo believed that dancing was a very intimate thing, even when he understood that an onstage performance was simply an act. He was always all about the business, making sure that he delivered for the audience. It was funny to him, because what he delivered was highly charged with emotion and sensuality. And yet, in a club, he couldn't dance freely because it felt like he was giving away too much of himself. As if he would reveal too much of himself if he danced in an environment which was not about putting on that performance.

Yet he could see that both Siana and N did not believe that, and had somehow managed to reconcile the performance part with the personal part. There was nothing personal going on between them, but they were dancing as if there were.

Leo felt supremely jealous that it was not he looking into Siana's eyes as she danced close to him, but N.

He didn't blame N at all, but it didn't mean he liked him for his behaviour. N and Siana were obviously similar creatures. It bothered Leo that he seemed to have the least rapport with Siana out of all of them. He felt like he could not bear to watch the scene, so he turned to go stand at the bar.

Hongbin appeared by his side immediately.

"Shall we get a beer, hyung?" He asked loudly into his ear. Leo nodded and leaned over to order from the bartender, who looked a little taken aback. Perhaps from seeing a foreign face, he supposed. He noticed the bartender sidle up to the other female bartender at the other end of the bar, and they turned to give him and Hongbin an appraising look.

Without acknowledging their stares, he turned to face the dance floor.

It was more like a large hall that had been rigged with speakers and lights. The bar was an island between the entry and the dance floor, which was packed with people. If it weren't for the darkness around the edge of the dance floor, the room would look much emptier.

"Hyung, are you alright?"

Leo nodded, patting Hongbin on the shoulder. He appreciated Hongbin's tact and grace, and was glad that he had shared his feelings with him earlier that day. Rather than feeling burdened by his own secretive nature, Hongbin had coaxed a confession out of him, and had given him space at the same time.

N was someone who wanted things out in the open, and Leo didn't appreciate not being allowed to go at his own pace. Leo felt that N was deliberately getting close to Siana to get a rise out of him, or to get him to make a move. He felt N was being reckless about it too. What if Siana got the idea that N was actually interested in her?

Leo watched as a couple of girls came up to Siana and said hi. She hugged them both, talking into their ears and then turning to make introductions with N. The music changed along with the lighting, suddenly going into chart music. Bieber's dancehall pop song "Sorry" came on, and he saw Siana and her girlfriends whoop with joy as they started doing the choreography. He saw N react apprehensively, smiling over at Hyuk who was also excited to hear the song and had his arms up as he danced.

Leo remembered what he saw in the dance studio that morning and figured that Siana loved these moves, rooted in dancehall and reggaeton, which had made their way into hip hop and pop music as choreo staples.

But though anyone could do the moves, only some people could really pull them off - and Siana was one of them. And N definitely wasn't. There was something intrinsically raw about those moves that Siana was feeling, and Leo could see she was trying to get N to feel it too by showing him a few steps. But N's style was much more something sensual rather than physical or sexual - and dancehall required a certain energy he didn't have.

Leo turned to receive the two beers from the male bartender, who opened them in front of him. He took them from the bartender, whose hand seemed to touch his for a little too long. Leo ignored it and passed one bottle to Hongbin. He was used to all sorts of unsolicited attentions from all sorts of people. He dealt with it by not acknowledging it, and that mostly worked. People got a little bit of him, and were happy to leave it at that.

He remembered Ravi laughingly called themselves prostitutes that morning.It wasn't far from the truth, but they all knew they were lucky and had choice. Leo sighed, knowing he wouldn't trade the life he had for a simpler one. So he came to terms with all the cons that came with it.

Leo looked over to Ravi and Ken, who seemed to be more into the song than N was, but they remained non-committal, avoiding eye contact, staring into space as they moved, and not really wanting to go the distance with the music. The only one truly enjoying himself was Hyuk, who, rather than dancing was really jumping up and down in excitement.

Hongbin laughed as he took his bottle.

"N-hyung's smile... it looks like fear," he giggled, slapping his thigh. Leo laughed too as he saw N look up and nod politely to Siana with that strained smile on his face, while she looked a little perplexed at his reticence. She turned her attention to her girlfriends, and they kept the rhythm together, aggressively popping their hips, chests and butts while laughing. It was a work out, Leo could see that they were breathless from the exertion.

The music changed to something slower, No Doubt's "Underneath It All", which was more of a classic reggae pop song. A few people, including Hyuk, left the dance floor for a breather since the music was slower, but Siana leaned in to speak to N, putting a light hand on his shoulder to balance herself as she went up a little on tiptoe.

Leo, who was about to take a swig from his bottle, stopped to watch the exchange.

He saw N listen carefully, then look down at Siana thoughtfully as she let go of him and resumed dancing, a little less aggressively and much more innocently, just swaying from side to side. She stepped forward to take N's hand in hers, encouraging him to follow her rhythm, which he did. Then she let go and slid her jacket back onto her shoulders, pulling the hood up for effect as she walked in place, rolling her shoulders with each step and putting a low bounce into her step. Suddenly the moves looked hiphop and masculine and it was something that N understood how to deliver. N hooked his thumb into his belt loop as he followed suit, and it was as if his temporary swag deficit had disappeared instantly.

Ravi and Ken found themselves stuck with the two friends of Siana, who had turned to include them in their dancing earlier. Too polite to leave the dance floor but too awkward to really get into it, they danced without making much eye contact. Leo knew they weren't shy, but were probably too used to the habit of not appearing to favour any individuals they came into contact with. Pop idol life was a life of ritual and obligation that they never really could shake off - and pop idols didn't pay special attention to others of the opposite sex unless they were fishing for trouble.

Leo watched Siana talking to N again, and gesturing with her hands. He realised she was talking about ideas she had for dancing together, because she would step back and try something new, and N would nod and try it himself.

Leo felt himself relax for the first time since their dinner, because he could see that, on the dance floor, it was all about the dancing for the two of them. Leo's anger towards N was still there, gently simmering. He would have to talk to N once they were alone. He didn't want it to be common knowledge that he was interested in Siana. There would be no end of ribbing, innuendo and god knows what else. The boys could end up letting her know about it, and he felt that he needed to have control over that eventuality. It made him angry to think that she could find out by accident, or through a joke. He didn't want everyone watching her, or him for that matter, when it became known.

IF it became known. Leo thought for a moment.

Did he mean to tell her? He realised that part of the reason he was so hesitant was habit. Force of habit instilled in them by expectations from their company. Actually, it was expectations from the fans, or so the company thought, that idols should remain committed to their fandom. As Kkomae had explained, it was simply an expectation.

That and the fact that he didn't think that forming a relationship here and now could possibly lead to anything more than a dalliance over a few weeks. Leo could not have that. For him, if he were going to be with someone, it was for a commitment - otherwise a relationship without purpose was a waste of time and effort.

He also knew what potential trouble lay ahead for him and for her, if he were to make it known that he was in a relationship.

Therefore, ANY relationship with Siana, whether permanent or temporary, could not happen.

He took another sip from his bottle, watching her with heavy lidded eyes under cover of darkness.

Therein lay the crux of the mattter.

No matter how much he tried, he couldn't stop thinking about her.

 

**

 

Siana was beginning to feel herself again, enjoying seeing her two friends Irini and Mirella who had their own dance school in the biggest township in the vicinity, in Amfissa. During the last year she had begun to notice the dancers in the area and had taken an interest in getting to know them and exchange ideas. They would often bump into each other in the various gathering spots in the area, but it was always in this club that they would hang out to dance.

Here, because of the unusually spacious dance area, they had room to move and chat as they danced to the music.

Now, she felt she was comfortable on the floor dancing with N, Irini and Mirella, whilst Ken and Ravi sort of kind of danced too. She thought it was funny that they continued dancing, even though they seemed to be getting more and more self-conscious with the girls dancing as a group with them. She presumed they were watching their behaviour as celebrities, but she felt it was more out of habit than because they believed they would actually be recognised.

She knew that the possibility of them being recognised by dancers was pretty high, since many of them were familiar with kpop dance routines. However, because dance instruction in the area tended to be more for traditional or classical dance, it was unlikely that students would know much about kpop idol groups.

People around here tended to want to learn the salsa, for exercise more than anything, and also tended to be older, as they could afford the luxury of dance lessons. So she felt there was little chance that they would be recognised, except maybe by a younger school crowd.

She realised N's dance vocabulary tended to live in the contemporary dance spectrum with commercial and hip hop thrown in. She and her dance friends, perhaps from being Greek and familiar with middle eastern belly dancing, enjoyed the more latin dance influences as well as reggae and hiphop.

She was relaxing, glad to see N responding to the music and getting into it, showing off his abilities to the pop reggae that was playing, albeit with a kpop-dance flavour.

She knew that, in most Greek nightclubs, the usual song lineup went from pop chart toppers in the early part of the evening when the doors opened around 10 pm, then moved into a more personal DJ selection which followed the various themes each night - and finally after midnight before the doors closed, would come the Greek pop, and commercial laika songs which would encourage clubbers to break out their tsifteteli moves. In Korea she knew the equivalent music to laika would be the faster dance trot songs, whilst in Malaysia the equivalent would be dangdut.

And while the appropriate dance moves didn't really resemble each other, there was one over-riding common theme: the music was meant to pluck the cultural heartstrings and make people let go. Clubbers de-stressed and ended up leaving the clubs feeling rejuvenated and uplifted, and a little more patriotic.

She made eye contact with Irini and Mirella, and they smiled knowingly. It was close to closing time and they knew the good songs were coming. She was hoping for some older Greek pop hits to make it to the playlist, and sure enough, the first strains of bouzouki strings laid over a middle-eastern beat began to play over the speakers.

There was a general shouting and whooping as the people returned to the dance floor, arms upraised and fingers snapping in time to the beat. This particular track was a big hit almost a decade ago, Panos Kiamos' "Return to Me", about a lovesick ex who admonishes his now-free girlfriend who is having a great time without him.

_"One heart, which is in pain for you and cries all night, senses you tonight._

_One life, which breaks in two and is now in pieces, cares for you tonight._

_One soul, which is lost and dies... for you"_

There is a word in Malay which describes the circumstance of being unable to bear one's feelings, be they the urge to pinch a baby's adorable cheeks, or feeling like biting someone out of irritation, or cuteness or lust - those feelings which threaten to spill over, are referred to as "geram".

And Siana always felt geram when she heard music which stirred the soul.

Hearing Kiamos' plaintive singing for the girl who was having too much fun while his heart was in pieces, created such feelings of angst and heartbreak in her, and she suspected, every other Greek in the house, that, coupled with the erotic beat of the middle eastern rhythm, made her body move sensually to the music.

Amidst the smiles and the cheers of happiness on the floor, there was an underlying soulful yearning in the moves that the song and the tsifteteli brought out, and Siana became lost in her own world.

She could see the lights change, and the people milling around her begin to sway, some making eye contact and smiling, others becoming introverted.

Although there was interaction between herself and others on the floor, the song and mood were about human loneliness, jealousy and submitting oneself to a cruel lover in order to feel loved. To the onlooker, the dancing may have seemed erotic, but to the dancer, there was an indescribable feeling of connection to a collective soul - recognising that all souls needed love, and that loneliness was a human condition shared by all.

She felt a tension rising in her body as she snaked her hips under cover of her jacket. Her arms twirled lazily above her head and she let her head drop back, making the hood fall and her hair spill out over her shoulder.

She closed her eyes, feeling a surge of emotion rise up from her chest, making her throat constrict. Swallowing hard, she covered her eyes with the back of her wrist, her other hand trailing down the front of her body to clutch at her heart for a moment as she undulated to the mesmerising strains of the song. A sudden shiver ran through her, raising goosebumps on the flesh of her arms and back.

She was struck by a sudden desire to be held close by someone.

She gasped, feeling as if she were about to cry. Her eyes fluttered open behind her wrist as she took a deep open-mouthed breath. She was familiar with this welling of emotions, which sometimes visited her when she was stressed or really getting into an emotional dance routine.

She let her hand drop, her eyes following it down to avoid meeting anyone's gaze. She didn't want anyone to mistake her expression for pain or sadness and become concerned.

But as she looked down, a tear fell from her eye, which took her by surprise.

Surreptitiously, she sniffed and wiped the tear away, taking care to hide her actions. She stopped dancing and turned to walk off the dance floor, when she felt someone catch her by the arm.

She turned to see Leo, tall magnificent Leo, looking at her with concern in his eyes. He stepped in towards her, at the same time pulling her to him so that she was close enough to feel the heat from his body as he looked down into her eyes.

"Are you okay?" he asked, so softly she didn't hear him, but only made out what he said by reading his lips.

She blinked, the tears in her eyes softening her vision. His lips were pink, and and for a moment hung open as he finished talking. She saw them press together in a stern line as he waited for her response.

It suddenly felt as she could keep her eyes open forever if it meant that they would see those lips, stern, or soft, or cruel or... She seemed to have lost the capacity to breathe.

Take a breath, Siana, take a breath. She felt that if she did take a breath, the moment would end and he would disappear or something. Finally, her eyes looked up to meet his.

She was not prepared for what she saw.

He was watching her with a mixture of concern and something else, something she could only describe as yearning, or hunger.

Desire.

She inhaled sharply, involuntarily, making a tiny noise which to her ears sounded desperate, helpless. There was no avoiding it now, no pretending, no denying.

She had seen it in his eyes, and he had seen her recognise his expression. In an instant, they had acknowledged their attraction for each other with a look.

She saw his eyes soften and could hear that his breathing was erratic as he leaned in to her ear.

"Let's go outside," he said, and without waiting for her answer, pulled her by the hand, his long stride making her walk faster, off the dance floor, out the front door and into the cool night air. The car park lights were bright and harsh under the dark sky.

The air was chilly, but felt like a caress on her cheeks and the exposed part of her neck. She felt her hand sit comfortably in Leo's warm grip as he walked a little way into the carpark towards one of the trees. Once they were out of sight of the entrance, he stopped. She stared at his broad shouldersas he took a moment to compose himself before turning to look at her.

He let go of her hand, putting both of his into his coat pockets. The action made her feel disappointed. Without thinking, she leaned back dejectedly against the tree and put her own hands into her pockets. She watched as his warm breath caused tendrils of mist to form as he exhaled. He looked down at her through the hair that had fallen into his eyes. She had a very geram urge to reach up and brush it out of the way.

"Why are you crying?" he asked, his voice soft and husky. The sound seemed to strike her deep in her chest. She thought he sounded breathless.

"I'm okay, it's just..." She didn't know how to describe her behaviour.

"Did anyone do anything to you? Because you were fine one moment, then..." He stopped, knowing that he had already given himself away.

Had he been watching her all that time? Siana felt her heart skip a beat. When she spoke, her voice was low and had become husky too.

"It... It's- It's the music. The song."

"It didn't sound like a sad song. What was it about?" He stepped closer, his hands coming out of his pockets. She had to lift her chin to keep eye contact, he was so close.

"It's about missing someone who doesn't think about you anymore," she said, and she saw his pupils dilating as he watched her mouth move while she spoke. She saw him swallow as he looked her in the eyes, his own eyes deep pools of desire.

"Missing someone?" he murmured, staring at her.He looked at her lips again, which had fallen open slightly. She nodded.

"Wanting someone?" he whispered, his eyes never leaving her lips.

"Yes," she whispered back, barely audible.

She saw him frown slightly, almost as if he was in pain, as he lifted his hands and put them lightly on each of her arms, leaning her gently against the tree.

He leaned down and forward, bringing his lips almost to hers as he breathed out the words, "Someone cruel?"

She didn't answer him as his mouth came down softly on hers, his lips firm but velvety. It was a gentle moment as he rested there with his chaste kiss, but it didn't last for long.

He opened his mouth and kissed her again, his lips hot and his tongue tracing along her lower lip. She opened to receive his ministrations, her own tongue meeting his as they kissed deeply, urgently. She felt his hands trace down along the outside of her arms, until they reached her wrists. He circled each wrist with his thumb and finger, cuffing them momentarily before letting them go.

Then she felt his hands go under her unzipped jacket, to rest lightly on her waist. She gasped, which allowed him to probe deeper inside her mouth with his tongue. She heard him moan, a sound that came from deep in his chest, a sound which made her feel like she could melt away.

Suddenly, she felt cold air on her wet lips, chilling them despite the heat they had generated.

Her eyes fluttered open to find that he was staring at her almost in horror.

"What?" she asked, in alarm. He released her, his hands falling to his sides, fisted. His expression went dark, and she watched him catch his breath as he stared into her eyes, desperate.

"What is it?" She reached out a hand, meaning to touch his arm, but he stepped back.

"I'm sorry. What am I doing?"

He rubbed a hand over his lips as he shook his head.

 


	5. Triple T

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Taekwoon confounds everyone at every moment, it seems

Leo wanted to put his hands on her, hold her tight, kiss, her, take her home with him.

But he kept his distance, his hand dropping from his mouth as he looked at her. Her mouth was still soft from their kiss. But her eyes... She was giving him such a look of bewilderment that he felt as if he had slapped her. She looked away, still a little taken aback by his sudden withdrawal.

He took her hand, hoping she would look back at him. She let out a bitter laugh and pulled her hand away, swallowing.

She finally looked at him, her eyes hard.

Leo wished he could go back, go back to when it was all alright, when it was him and her, and their kiss. Right now, he didn't know how to explain himself. He felt like he had lost control and taken something for himself, for him to feel good about, without thinking about the consequences.

Even now, even while she was obviously pained by him, he wanted another kiss, another forever of kissing and more.

The moment he walked away from Hongbin in the club was the moment he had abandoned his restraint, his composure, and all the measured thinking that he had been doing about Siana that day.

He strode towards her, watching her mouth open as she took a deep breath whilst dancing with her eyes closed. He felt the heat of lust curling in his gut, but more than that, he felt like he wanted to be the man she needed, to be the one to make her happy.

When he saw the teardrop fall as she tried to hide her emotions, he almost lunged for her. In that moment he felt that he couldn't let her get away. He caught her and pulled her to face him. She immediately hid her emotions, but he could also see that she was pleased to see him. He felt his heart could soar out of his body with a kind of joy he rarely felt. He wanted to pull her into his arms, and it took all his strength not to let the urge overcome him.

When he asked her if she was okay, she watched his mouth as if she wanted a taste. He had to shut his and control his erratic breathing. He felt crowded by the music, the people, by their friends. He wanted her all to himself, he needed to know what was going on in her head and her heart.

When he leaned in to talk in her ear, he wanted to put her earlobe into his mouth and suck on it.

He didn't know how he kept a control of himself, because he felt that he was a moment away from losing it.

When they were finally alone, he had to put his hands in his pockets to try to gain control. But... she was looking at him, telling him about the song, about the feelings that it had stirred in her, about the lover who had left without another thought. Her eyes had a sadness in them, they were still wet from earlier, but her expression as she looked at him, he thought she was searching for his soul in his eyes.

He had to have her, had to make her his. He knew that she would reciprocate if he made the first move, at least that was what he saw in her eyes: an invitation. He took his hands out of his pockets, taking a step closer. She seemed to soften, looking deeply into his eyes as he spoke softly about missing and wanting someone.

It struck him that for an ex-lover to flaunt her happiness in front of a heartbroken man, was a cruel thing to do.

When he finally kissed her, he tasted salt from her tear, and the sweet lingering aftertaste of the fruit they had both eaten earlier. He also tasted her, and felt her urging tongue respond to his. He felt alive, could hear his heartbeat in his ears, and his breath quickening.

He could feel his control unravelling, and heard himself moan deeply. He felt her become languid at the sound, as if she could melt into his arms, and knew that she was as vulnerable as he was to their passion.

It was then that he realised that Siana could be his, wanted to be his.

And the enormity of that realisation hit him like a tonne of bricks. Even as he felt her soft lips under his, he couldn't help thinking, how could he subject her to what was to come if he let her believe there was a possibility of them being together? She could not have any idea of what the consequences of being with him would be, and he didn't want to bring that aspect of his world crashing down into her world. She deserved more than that.

So he broke the kiss and stepped away.

And now she was looking at him as if he was scum.

"Don't tell me. It's for my own good?" she looked up at him accusingly.

He wished he could agree with her out loud because that was the real truth of it. But he knew he couldn't without hurting her, and it made him feel ashamed.

"Let me explain-" he began.

She pushed past him and began walking out of the carpark. Leo went after her, grabbing her hand. She turned on him, her eyes fiery. Her voice was quiet, but low and ominous.

"You want more souvenirs?" she spat.

He was aghast. She thought he was using her for kicks, just satisfying his own physical needs.

"I'm not like that-"

"But you are. You just behaved like that. You ARE like that." She stated, staring him dead in the eyes.

Leo didn't know what to say. He thought he was acting honourably, protecting her from himself and his world. Yet when she voiced his own reasoning back at him, her words, which matched his own thoughts, made him feel ashamed of himself. To her, it looked exactly like it was: she had exposed her desire to him, he had gotten his kiss and then dropped her cold.

Her pride was hurt, and she felt used. He realised with a jolt that his actions were a result of his overthinking, or at least his bad timing.

"I'm sorry." He stated plainly. He knew explaining himself would make things worse right now. He could only confess his true feelings, which were remorse.

"Please keep to yourself. I don't think I can stand to see you right now." He saw tears well up in her eyes, but she turned quickly and walked out of the carpark into the darkness.

 

**

 

Siana blinked the tears out of her eyes and shoved her hands into her pockets. She felt burning humiliation. She felt stupid and vulnerable, but mostly stupid.

Every time she thought about how she had looked longingly into Leo's eyes, she cringed. It should have been a better memory than that, but he had to go and turn away in the middle of one of the hottest, tastiest, most glorious moments of her life.

She remembered the look on his face as he had wiped his mouth. That gesture seemed to say it all, and it hurt her so bad.

Then the look in his eyes.

He looked... disgusted. The thought made her squeeze her eyes shut with mortification. She thought she had seen genuine signs of attraction, but maybe all this time she was imagining it.

Maybe all this time he had thought she was easy.

She groaned loudly up into the night sky. I've spent the whole day thinking about Leo and Vixx, and now I think I could actually be sick of them all, she thought.

Then she suddenly thought, maybe I am easy. I don't even know these guys, and there I was under a tree like some schoolgirl, dancing the Tongue Tango with Taekwoon.

She giggled through her pain. Then she heard Leo call out to her from behind.

She walked faster down the driveway and came to the highway, which was empty. She crossed it quickly and walked onto the main intersecting road that would take her almost to her doorstep, although she had to walk through Kirra first. The walk was a good three or four kilometres, but she was up for it, even in the dead of night.

She could hear Leo break into a trot as he tried to catch up with her. She wondered what twisted soul would keep on harassing someone they had just humiliated.

Someone like Tongue Tango Taekwoon, obviously.

She had to clamp her hand over her mouth to stop laughing.

She decided she would call him Triple T from now on.

She darted into the shadows and turned down a tiny lane that went directly to the pebble beach. If she walked along the beach instead of the main road, she would arrive at her uncle's hotel, from where it was a short walk across the same main street to her home. With any luck, Leo would be disoriented and return to his friends.

Even better, she hoped he would get lost and wander into the olive groves forever.

Siana smiled. That wouldn't happen as he would eventually come out the other side somewhere.

Her humorous thoughts made her relax a little. She could hear Leo call out to her from the main street, and she walked silently on, pleased with herself that he couldn't find her.

She looked at the still waters of the bay, which shone silver under the ambient starlight and gentle moonlight. The water lapped gently on the pebble shore, making a gentle tinkling noise. She breathed in a deep breath of the sea air, feeling a strange calm wash over her. She walked almost a kilometre until she came to a small jetty which jutted out into the bay. It was concrete, and barely stuck out more than a metre into the water. On it, she could still reach the pebbles on the beach to grab a handful to throw into the water.

The sound of the tiny pebbles falling into the water was like rain, and she did it over and over, its soft noise satisfying.

She remembered she was supposed to be under the chaperonage of Panos. She pulled out her mobile phone and texted him. Going home.

He texted back almost immediately. I know. Say goodnight to Leo for me. Kiss Kiss.

Siana could have thrown the phone into the sea. Instead she gently put it in her lap and put her head in her hands.

Did they all see them leave together? Oh god, did anyone follow them outside?

Hang on, shouldn't Panos have come after her and defended her honour?

She pouted.

I have been abandoned. I am alone, she thought dramatically, flinging her hands out and dropping back to lie down on the cold concrete jetty. She looked up at the stars. The cold air made her breath fog above her face as she lay there.

She heard the scrape of feet on the pebbles.

She was partly disappointed that her few moments alone under the stars were disrupted, but partly happy that Triple T had found her. She sat up, determined to be angry at him, but she seemed to have lost all her bitter feelings between wishing he would get lost and lying under the stars.

She turned, hardening her expression, and was alarmed to find it wasn't Leo, but the man who had entered their building earlier that evening.

Mad Eyes.

And his companion, the one who had seemed to be able to manage him and his craziness, was nowhere to be seen.

She jumped up on her feet and immediately got off the jetty. She wasn't going to have him try to corner her there. He came forward, his eyes roaming over her face and body as he did.

It made her mad to think that he had the right to look her over like that. But then she thought, he's unhinged. There's more going on here than feeling angry at the way this man was looking at her.

She steeled herself for an attack, going over in her mind the few points and maneouvres she had learnt in various self-defence and martial arts workshops she had attended at school. Aikido: use the assailant's force to unbalance him. If he grabs you, drop like a deadweight. If he pins you to the ground, use your body like a fulcrum to lever him off. Points of attack: eyes, neck, abdomen, groin.

Aaaah, she had no idea what to do.

None of that seemed to make any sense in the face of the panic that she felt. Mad Eyes was advancing, but besides the crazy eyes, he didn't seem to have one purposeful bone in his body. It was almost as if he would hone in on any moving object. She walked sideways towards the little alleyway that she had come down from the main road on, trying to keep herself face on to him.

As she circled back to the lane, she felt an ominous presence behind her. She darted a look around, expecting someone to be in the alleyway.

But it was the other gypsy, and he was standing right at her back.

She screamed a blood-curdling scream and whirled around, her right arm coming up with deadly force to hit him square in the nose with an upward thrust of the heel of her palm. She followed through with the weight of her body, driving her hand deep into his face with all her might.

His head snapped back and she saw a spurt of blood erupt from his nose as he humphed in pain. His cry became gurgled as the blood ran into his throat, and in a horrifyingly comic moment, one hand clutched at his face while the other reached out dramatically towards her, as he seemed to fall backwards onto the road in slow motion.

Siana's hands flew to her mouth as she watched him crumble onto the ground in pain.

She heard Mad Eyes run forward to help his comrade, but she was too shocked to move. Mad Eyes got on the ground, but all he could see was his friend's bloody face as he screamed with the pain.

Mad Eyes suddenly focused on her, and he jumped up as if to attack.

"Stop, let me call for help," she said, in as calm a voice as she could.

But suddenly he stilled, his eyes wary.

Siana looked closely, and felt the hairs on the back of her neck rise. He was looking a little above her head and to the side, and she got the creepiest feeling he was seeing a ghost.

Suddenly, Leo stepped forward from behind and stood in front of her, between her and Mad Eyes. She looked up to see his eyes were deadly, and the muscle in his cheek moved as he set his jaw in a determined line.

For an insane moment she thought, how dare he stand there and look like a hero, when she was the one who had decked the man now writhing in pain?

She looked at Mad Eyes. And then there was this guy. Standing there frightened by a tall good-looking man with the face of an anime warrior. Ugh.

"What is this, a music video?" she mumbled.

She saw a light come on in a couple of the nearby houses, and heard shutters open and people calling out, asking what was going on. She called out an apology in Greek, and heard people closing up again.

She saw Mad Eyes lose focus again, and he began to walk backwards into the shadows, his eyes glancing nervously between his hurt buddy and his escape route.

Leo walked forward and leaned over the prone man, putting a hand on his shoulder to try to calm him.

"I am too scared to ask what he did," Leo said to her.

"He startled me," she said in a small voice. She could see Leo stifling a smile. She was peeved that he thought it was funny.

"It was almost as funny as being cornered by two advancing strangers," she said petulantly.

Leo's smile disappeared.

Great. Now she felt like the meanest person in town. It was as if she had kicked the guy after he was down. There was not much she could do about the guilt she was feeling, even when she felt she had every right to protect herself when she thought she was in danger. She wasn't sure if she should tend to the man or call the police. She had never assaulted anyone before. Unless she counted the 8 year old school boy who had yanked on her pigtails at school that one time.

She pulled her phone out and called her dad. He answered almost immediately, still awake. In as calm a voice as possible she explained what had happened and asked him what she should do.

Both Mikhalis and Leo said at the same time, "He needs a doctor." Siana looked down at Leo, wishing that he would stop ticking all the right boxes over and over again.

Mikhalis told her to sit tight so he could pick them up. She hung up and kneeled down next to Leo in front of the man, and spoke to him for the first time since she knocked him down.

"Sir, help is coming. We will make sure you are okay first. If you want to report me for assault, I will gladly go with you to the station after we see to your nose. Your friend can come as your witness. If you can find him." Mad Eyes had disappeared and left his partner behind.

The man cried out helplessly, which prompted Leo to look at her out of the side of his eye.

"Are you alright?" he asked her. She nodded.

"Did you head-butt him?"

"No, I used my hand."

"You punched him?" Leo looked impressed.

She motioned with her hand, showing him what she did. He looked at her seriously.

"I should be glad that you didn't do that to me," he said quietly.

She dropped her hand, surprised. "I wouldn't have done that to you!" she squeaked.

He kept his eyes down.

Having time to cool down had given her time to decompress, and his statement made her wonder if she had overreacted to his behaviour. She decided she hadn't - because at the time, his action had hurt her very much.

But his words gave her pause to think. Perhaps he regretted it more than she had thought he did.

She spoke quietly, hesitantly.

"I've spent a day with Vixx. That's already ridiculous. Then you-" She looked up at him. He was watching her with a concerned look on his face. When she made eye contact with him, she was surprised to see his face redden. She couldn't say it out loud.

"I like you," he said, simply.

She felt her pulse quicken, but the events of the night made her wary. She bowed her head, not sure what to say.

"You were right. I acted dishonourably from the moment I thought you would be willing to-"

Siana put her head in her hands and groaned. "Can we just not talk about it please?" She didn't know which sounded worse, his own admission or his reference to her eagerness to kiss Triple T. She giggled through a sob.

The man on the ground whimpered. She looked to see he was peeking at her through his hand. She noted the blood had stopped flowing, and guessed that his wound was shallow. He seemed to be breathing alright. Just then they heard a car drive up and the glare of headlights lit them up.

Leo helped the man up, and she stood to see her dad come out of the car.

"Are you alright?"

She nodded, and watched as Leo opened the back door of the car as he held the man upright by his arm.

Before he could help the man get in, he wrenched free and scampered off into the darkness.

Mikhalis called after him in Greek, but the guy was soon gone. He turned back to look at Siana and Leo, who stood, silent and apart, near the car. He looked from one to the other.

"So. Where is everyone else?" he asked.

 

**

 

Mikhalis hung up and dropped his phone into the cup holder as he drove them home. Next to him, Siana sat primly in her seat whilst in the back, Leo sat almost sideways at the window seat to accommodate his long limbs.

Mikhalis turned to Siana, saying, "Uncle Mitsos has sent a patrol car to the area, but he said we should take extra precautions. You can make a police report too, which will mean they can be picked up for questioning if they are seen."

"But I hit him," Siana said.

"Self-defence."

"No. The guy I hit was just standing there. I hit him out of sheer surprise. It was the crazy looking other one that was stalking. If you could call it that. He may just be unhinged."

"Are you related to everyone in Itea?" Leo asked from the back.

Siana and Mikhalis looked at each other for a brief moment.

"Yes," they answered in unison.

"But not all blood relatives, you understand," explained Mikhalis. "And I married outside of Itea."

Siana looked at her father sideways with a raised eyebrow. What was he trying to excuse himself for?

"Dad, we're not inbred. Though I can't say much about Yianni and his brothers."

"No, neither can I," said Mikhalis. He and Siana bumped fists.

"So where is everyone else, anyway?" Mikhalis asked nonchalantly.

"They're still dancing I think." Siana answered.

"Oh, and how did that go?" Mikhalis prodded.

Siana looked out the window and smiled. She had a great time with N on the floor, but she had been surprised to find the boys in general a little reticent to let go in public.

"Some of them are shyer than others," she said.

"That's funny, though, for professional performers," Mikhalis said, checking Leo's reaction in the rear view window. Leo looked back at him impassively, not really knowing how he was supposed to react.

"I suppose they have a code of public behaviour. In case people take pictures of them or something."

"Is that your opinion, Leo?" Mikhalis asked. They pulled up to their building.

Leo took his time answering as MIkhalis parked.

"The backlash from bad press can be very... damaging," he said.

Mikhalis glanced at him one more time in the mirror, and saw that Leo was watching Siana the whole time. He pulled on the handbrake and opened the door, which lit up the interior. Mikhalis got out and watched as Leo came out too, his eyes on Siana. Siana, on the other hand, kept to herself, her eyes downcast.

Mikhalis wondered what had happened between those two. A fight? Over-excited lewd dancing at the club? Or perhaps something more intimate or personal?  
He shut the door and locked the car, letting Siana walk ahead as Leo came round the car. He wasn't about to interfere in her personal business, but Mikhalis felt Leo knew what he was talking about - and it looked as if Siana didn't like what she heard.

He hung back, pretending he had left something in the car, to give them a moment alone together. He waved them on, saying he would be in in a second. He pretended to rummage around in the car as he watched them walk into the lobby.

The more he learned about Leo, the more he liked him. He had seemed quiet, subdued, when they had first arrived, but Mikhalis noted that he had responded to his mates' conversation cheerily enough. Now it seemed that a pall had fallen over him since the incident in the lobby earlier that night, but Mikhalis suspected that could be for any number of reasons.

That Siana had left early with him was interesting, but Mikhalis didn't know enough of what happened to speculate.

He wondered, could there be an attraction between them that went beyond their status as fan and idol? Mikhalis sat in the car for a moment.

He didn't think he would mind someone like Leo being Siana's choice at all.

He counted to ten before loudly slamming the car door to give them notice of his impending arrival.

Inside, Leo reached a tentative hand out to Siana's elbow.

"Can we talk?" he asked.

Siana looked up at him with tired eyes. The corner of her mouth lifted slightly, and he wished he could kiss the wrinkle it made.

"You know, N had no problem dancing with me in the club. What's up with the rest of you?"

Leo ran a hand through his hair in frustration. A frown creased his forehead briefly as he dropped his hand to his side.

"If you tell me now that you still want me to keep away, I'll do it. But can we talk? Sometime soon?"

Siana didn't know what to say. It seemed so final to say that, even though she had already said it in the heat of the moment in the carpark.

She wished so hard that he had never pulled away. Or even that they had never kissed. At least, they would still be on comfortable speaking terms and able to enjoy each other's company as they had earlier that afternoon at Miami.

She wished she could show him Itea, and Delphi and Arachova. She wanted to take him to cafes and go for walks, or go up to the mountains.

She didn't want to say anything that could jeopardise those possibilities.

But is was not she who had cut it off. It was not she who had pulled away - but rather, he who had regretted them kissing. He who had asked himself, "What am I doing?" after kissing her with such gentle, but searing passion. What else was she supposed to think, except that he regretted kissing her? Or, worse, that it was all a ploy to steal it from her anyway.

She felt that for the next few weeks to work, they did have to talk. But she didn't want to think of it now, it was too recent and raw for her.

"Tomorrow morning I will be rehearsing with N and Ravi. I'm tired and I need to rest. Let's just leave it for now. Maybe give it a week."

Mikhalis came in, stamping his feet on the mat in front of the door, as if he had been walking through the rain or through snow. Siana frowned. He was acting funny though.

"Ah, Leo, let me show you the studio. I showed everyone else, and they told me you would be using it too."

Leo turned to face Mikhalis politely. Siana quickly opened the elevator door and said a quiet, overly cheerful "Goodnight!" and pulled it shut quickly behind her.

Leo glanced at the lift, but she was already going up. He turned back to Mikhalis, a tight smile on his face.  
Mikhalis unlocked the studio door and let Leo in.

 

**

[A little while after this chapter was first posted elsewhere, Leo from Vixx deactivated his IG account and twitter amidst the furore of fan anger regarding a picture they had misconstrued to be exclusivist activity:( ]

**

 

Leo was pleasantly surprised by how well-appointed the studio was, but he could see that it was unused, and he wondered why.

Mikhalis started turning on equipment as Leo wandered slowly around the room. He found awards, memorabilia and hard disks neatly arranged in locked glass cabinets. He could tell that Mr Mikhalis was successful in the music industry, but he wasn't a performer, perhaps not even a working musician. He surmised that he must be a producer who claimed accolades for his compositions or arrangements.

Leo knew that one day, if he ever lost his passion or ability for singing, this was what he would be doing too, if he could. He saw Mr Mikhalis with new respect.

When he finally stopped in the centre of the room, Mikhalis had booted up the main computer and had brought up a programme on the two monitors he had atop the desk.

Leo looked abashedly at him.

"I am not sure what to do with all this. I'm used to just using my keyboard and hard drive. Everything else is done by people more experienced than I am."

Mikhalis smiled. "There is always someone better, and more experienced than any of us. You can just use this for composition or you can play around with the software and see what you can make of it."

Leo looked at the equipment, a sombre expression on his face. He knew the company had rented the studio for Ravi and that he had full access to it, but he felt as if Mr Mikhalis was going out of his way to show him all this for some reason. After all, Ravi could have brought him here to show him around instead.

Mikhalis gestured for him to sit as he himself took a seat.

"It looks empty, doesn't it? Lifeless. I spent a lot of time in this studio and it served me very well. But it cost me my marriage, and I almost lost my baby girl as well. I got too busy thinking about the work."

Mikhalis smiled wistfully to himself. He imagined little baby Siana running around under the desk and crying because he wouldn't let her play under there.

"Now I have a small room in my home where I work all alone."

Leo knew this story. It was his too.

Mikhalis saw Leo's mood had fallen, and he reached over and slapped him on the knee.

"Nothing to be sad about. Because after work, I go outside and see my friends and family, and I enjoy the rest of my life. If I had done that sooner, my wife and daughter would still be here with me."

Mikhalis pulled back, watching Leo closely. Leo seemed to be searching for words to respond to him, but he continued.

"I don't know much about your group. But I can see you boys are committed to your work. And I know a bit about the pop culture going on there. It's brutal. It takes a lot to keep going, so I can presume that you all have the character to face whatever comes your way."

Leo sensed that Mikhalis was about to bring up Siana, and he wondered how much Mikhalis knew, or guessed, what was going on between them. He kept his eyes downcast repsectfully, bracing himself for a warning.

Mikhalis broke the intensity of his own gaze by looking around the room.

"You know, I recorded Ana here. But somewhere along the line, instead of bringing her with me on my journey, I shut her out." Mikhalis suddenly laughed to avoid crying. He blinked away tears, and was thankful Leo kept his eyes down. He took a deep breath and exhaled forcefully, gaining control of himself.

"Ana was young, and forgiving her father was easy for her. But her mother, well, she was alone in a strange world, and I can't forgive myself for abandoning her in her own home. If I could do it all again..."

Mikhalis stood and walked around his chair, coming to rest his elbows on the back of it to look at Leo. Leo, sensing he should show due attention, sat up and looked up at him.

"My biggest regret was thinking that I could protect them from my world by keeping them away from it. I didn't know that they were willing to go on that journey with me. I should have held them close, but I shut them out."

Leo searched Mikhalis' eyes for some meaning. He couldn't tell if he was being warned or being advised.

Mikhalis slapped the back of the chair and straightened up, laughing.

"Ah, I'm just an old man trying to be clever. I'm sure you kids have your life planned out better than I ever did."

He went to the desk and jiggled the mouse to make the pointer on the screen move.

"There's no lock, you can just use any part of it. And don't worry, you can't break it, so feel free to try anything. Just make sure to turn it all off when you leave and pull the door shut. Your manager has the key for when you want to come back in."

Mikhalis went to leave, and Leo stood and bowed politely.

"Mr Mikhalis, thank you. I think I will be here most of the time at first, because Ravi will be working with N tomorrow in the studio."

"Ah, N." Mikhalis smiled, shaking his head. Leo smiled too. Mikhalis waved for him to sit back down and left the studio.

Leo sat down, perplexed. Perhaps it was for language differences, but he wasn't certain what Mr Mikhalis was trying to tell him. From the atmosphere he knew that Siana's father intended to reach out to him, but it seemed like he had left his message open to interpretation.

Leo both liked that and disliked it. He liked it because it gave him the freedom to decide what he could do on his own. He disliked it because it mean that whatever he decided, he couldn't blame anyone but himself for the consequences of his actions.

Sometimes he wondered if he truly wanted freedom, because it meant being ultimately responsible for everything he did. It was kind of nice to be a part of a team, because it meant everyone rose and fell together. Leo realised that perhaps his true nature was to be a team player, even though he tended to take on leadership roles and stood out so much.

He pulled his chair up to the console and used the mouse to look through the files on the desktop monitor.

It was empty except for a couple of files labelled "Source" and "FX". When he clicked through them he realised they were live recordings Mr Mikhalis must have made to use for accent notes or sound effects for commercials or animations.

He found a file labelled Heart, and opened it. In it were tiny audio clips of a child laughing, crying, yelling, giggling. And finally, a longer file that turned out to be a jingle for some kind of baby product. He suddenly realised that he must be listening to the recordings of Siana that Mikhalis had mentioned. Leo leaned back in his seat and listened to the track again and again.

He imagined she would look up into her father's eyes with those twinkling brown eyes, and that her father would feel pride that she was his. Or perhaps, like Mikhalis had mentioned, he might have pushed her away so that he could continue working. He wondered if little Siana might have felt rejection and had left to cry alone.

Her voice was high, giggly, cute... nothing like the Siana he had met today of course. She was alternately grave, warm, determined, sexy... Leo couldn't help remember her dancing alone, studying herself, working out. The focus and intensity in her eyes, broken now and then by her sense of humour as she laughed at herself too, her beautiful, strong body... Her kiss.

Leo could feel conflicting energies in his body. He had been moved by Mr Mikhalis' story, and felt a deep connection to it. But he was also still high from that kiss, and low from the aftermath. He felt that his mind wanted to keep things uncomplicated and pure, but his body was urging him to follow through on every lustful thought he had about her.

It was this kind of energy that often stirred up the creative juices in Leo, because other than physical activity, he had no other outlet for his soulful passions. He couldn't talk to people when these moods struck him, not just because he was an idol and separate from friends and family, but because that was his nature too.

And he felt that someone in his place couldn't really complain about it.

He pulled up the programme software and tried to familiarise himself with it. All programmes had the same purpose, but functions were different and he was unfamiliar with this one. As long as he could figure out commands, he could begin composing and doing some simple recordings. With all the time he had here in Greece, he knew he would be able to do some arrangements and produce a final product. Mastering and engineering would be taken care of by someone else.

Leo suddenly felt a peace descend on him. He had something to focus on, which would also let him indulge his emotions as he worked through those conflicting feelings and put them all down onto musical tracks that he could sing his heart out on and let him expunge those feelings without ever having to take any action or make any decision. He would work, and slowly let thoughts of Siana leave him and his treasonous body.

Maybe I am just avoiding my problems, he thought wryly.

Then he suddenly remembered N's jokes about his prolific candle-making hobby in the bus as they had arrived in Itea that morning. He sighed, understanding that joke on a new level.

This is my candle-making, he thought to himself, laughing.

 

**

 

Siana woke up from a few hours of fitful sleep, her dreams fraught with images of Mad Eyes, Leo looking at her like she was disgusting, splashing blood and flashing lights.

She lay in bed, feeling battered and weary. She felt like the last thing she wanted was to see any of the boys. But without thinking, she brought her hand up to her lips.

This was where Leo had rested his mouth on hers and kissed her as if he was drinking honey.

She closed her eyes, reliving the memory. It made her insides grow warm.She had felt so cherished, so wanted, for a moment.

She turned on her side, feeling desire and sadness all at once.

He could have let her touch him, let her put her fingers through his hair, run her hands down his neck and shoulders. He could have let her have that, but he had torn that away from her, and she couldn't let it go.

She wanted to know why.

And he had asked her to give him the chance to explain, but she thought that maybe knowing would be worse.

What if the real truth was that he changed his mind halfway through their kiss? That he simply didn't desire her anymore.

What if the real truth was that he was unkind? That it was all a joke?

She squeezed her eyes shut. She didn't delude herself into thinking that she was in love, but these horrible feelings of uncertainty were exactly why she had avoided having a serious boyfriend for so long.

Why was she letting this one person whom she barely knew, get to her like this? She felt all the confidence she had about herself was being shaken.

She sat up, determined not to let this bring her down.

If he was fickle, and decided she wasn't worth it just because of their kiss, she didn't need someone like him.

If he was unkind and was playing her, then good riddance.

She got up, deciding to go down to the studio early to start warming up before the others arrived. As she pottered around, making her bed, washing up in the bathroom and making breakfast, she thought of the man upstairs who had such a hold over her.

She sat stirring a tea at the table. It was an unreal situation. She had been crushing on Leo for several years, had met him, and discovered that there was a mutual attraction which had seemed so deep and uncontrollable that they had shared a kiss within 24 hours of meeting.

It was natural that he would have this hold over her - but she still didn't like it.

She disliked that he seemed to have all the power, and had even changed the tone of their relationship without thought of her needs or wants, with his outrageous reaction.

But her anger from the night before had dissipated. Now she felt ragged at the edges, as if she had been through a tumbler and had her dreams washed away.

That awful sadness was all mixed up with the lingering sensual feelings that the kiss had awakened in her, and it made her feel frustrated.  
She sipped her tea, feeling irritated.

She didn't need this in her life. She couldn't face another how many weeks feeling like this, especially with him being in such close proximity. She had to get over him and dive into work and busy-ness and being happy to be here in Greece.

No matter what, she would put that Leo out of her mind.

No matter what.

 

**

 

Siana walked slowly down the stairs after her breakfast. She was hoping that a fresh start would take her mind off things, and looked forward to seeing N and finding out how he worked.

As she reached the bottom and started unlocking the small door that would lead to her studio from the lobby, she heard a door open to her left. She looked up to see Leo coming out of the studio, his wide frame filling the doorway as he looked around to switch off the lights. She stopped moving, not sure if he had seen her.

She realised that he was still wearing the same clothes as the night before, and that he had spent the night in there.

He noticed her, and turned immediately to look at her, his hand on the door knob. He leaned against the door jamb from inside the studio, and then let the door swing shut against his back.

His eyes were red-rimmed from a sleepless night, and his expression was something she could only describe as mellow. He looked down at her lazily, a soft smile on his lips. It was almost as if he was about to close his eyes and sleep leaning against the doorway. She had a sudden thought that in his semi-stupor, he looked incredibly seductive.

"Siana," he said, his voice dry and husky. He seemed goofy, a little insane from being up all night. He sighed, closing his eyes for a moment.

"Good morning," she said, politely. He frowned.

"Mmm. You sound like a stranger," he said, his eyes still closed, still frowning, as if her greeting had hurt his head.

"Well, we just met yesterday," Siana said, still polite.

His eyes fluttered open, and though they were bloodshot from being so close to sleep, they had an intense hurt quality that took her aback. He looked at her, almost accusingly, with a gaze that made her catch her breath.

He looked... hungry.

He leaned forward, squeezing out from between the door and the doorway, letting it click shut behind him, and took a step towards her.  
Involuntarily, Siana took a step back.

Her action seemed to wake him up a little. He stopped, suddenly aware that he may have seemed menacing. His face softened again, tiredness seeping back into his features.

"Yes, we just met yesterday," he said, resignedly. He looked despondently at her, his eyes full of regret.

He turned and pressed the call button for the lift, not realising it was already at the ground floor in his tiredness. Siana watched the interior light flash on and then off again as he let go of the button, and then realised he was waiting for it come down and hadn't noticed it was there already.

He leaned against the wall right next to the lift, letting his head fall against the wall and stared down the bridge of his nose at her with puppy eyes.

He was sleep-deprived and lovelorn. And he was leaning by the parked lift watching her, thinking it was not there yet.

She stifled a smile and walked forward to open the lift door. To do so, she had to reach almost around him, as he was partially obscuring the door handle.

He stood still, watching her come forward and not moving out of the way. His eyes followed hers as she neared him, until he was peering down at her face through his sleepiness, her mouth just a forward-bend away from kissing. He could smell her shampoo, he could feel the heat of her body, he knew she could feel his breath, he was so close.

As she pulled the door open, he put his hand on hers, forcing her to look into his eyes. He wanted to whisper his sorries and take her in his arms, and his breath quickened with longing.

"Please... let me explain," he said in a husky, fervent whisper.

Siana let him hold her there, his hand a welcome warmth on hers. She was torn. She wanted to let him speak, but she had felt so wrecked by the whole situation. And she had just resolved to move on from it no matter what.

She noticed that even in his exhausted state, his whole being seemed to thrum with intensity, and it was all focused on her.

She liked the feeling it gave her. The feeling that she had some effect on him.

She felt that, in his state of helplessness, she was something that he looked to for succour. For the first time since that dreadful parting, she had felt that he was waiting upon her pleasure, and that he would do whatever she wanted.

"Alright," she said simply.

He seemed surprised, unsure whether he had heard correctly. Then relief spread over his features. He opened his mouth to speak, but she interjected.

"But not now. Next week." She said.

He shut his mouth and drew in a patient breath, nodding.

"I might lose my mind in the meantime," he murmured, looking down at her mournfully.

Siana thought she might just lose her mind right at that moment. He was like a man-child, sleepily charming her with his petulance and sexiness.She had to make sure he understood that he couldn't play that game with her without consequences. Much as she would like to give in and let him follow through on what he seemed to promise, she was still smarting from his hurtful actions, and wanted him to take what he was giving too.

She put a hand onto his chest, which surprised him so that he looked down at it, and gently pushed him backwards into the lift.

As she let the door swing shut, she said, "And I will be dancing with N and Ravi in the meantime."

She turned, knowing that the light in the lift would turn off until he pressed for his floor. She didn't wait to see what he did, just walked down the little staircase til she reached the other door at the bottom.

She felt in control, without feeling controlling.

She unlocked the door and turned on the lights. She pulled her phone out and set up the bluetooth system. She put one of her more gentle playlists on shuffle and began some light warm ups incorporating stretching and yoga moves on the floor, as she was feeling a lack of energy.

She took some time to really lean into the stretches, focusing on her breathing. The process was relaxing her, unwinding that coiled spring of tension that she felt in her stomach.

When N and Ravi came in through the same door, she was planking. They walked to the mirrors without speaking, setting down their bags and phones and pulling off coats.

Wordlessly, they joined her in the centre, each going into his own warm ups.

Siana was planking, her body parallel to the ground as she rested only on her elbows and forearms, and on the tips of her toes. She was breaking a sweat, even though she had only planked for about two minutes. She had turned on the heating so that they could rehearse in comfort and keep their bodies warm, but she realised that it could make the room stuffier than she had expected.

She was trying to make five minutes while planking, but her focus was being diverted by the two tall men who were going through their warm ups. They were both wearing leggings under shorts, and after a few hard stretches, N stripped off to reveal a loose tank top.

She was trying hard not to stare at his bare arms and the hint of pectorals at the arm holes. When she averted her eyes away from his arms, she found herself looking at the base of his neck, where she could see the muscles of his chest meet in a taut centre line that dipped below the neckline of his shirt.

She realised, she had never seen that much of N's skin anywhere on her social media feeds.

She looked down at the spot between her forearms on the floor, using her breathing to help her control her energy. She closed her eyes, gritting her teeth. Then she heard N get on the ground as well, and his voice which sounded very close by her.

"You're up early."

She opened her eyes to find N was lying on his side facing her, his head propped up on one hand. She almost lost her concentration, but dropped her eyes back to their focus point on the ground before her in an effort to keep going.

"Everything okay?"

She nodded, a bead of sweat forming on her forehead and sliding slowly, irritatingly, down the side of her nose. She waited for it to fall onto the ground, but it didn't - which irritated her more.

"You disappeared last night. First I was watching you grinding to the music with your eyes closed. Very nice," he nodded, a slight smile on his lips.

"Then I turned away for a moment, and when I looked back, you were gone."

She knew N was watching her closely, so she looked up briefly, her expression a shrug. His was smiling, though his eyes were expressionless. For a moment, she felt as if he was looking at her threateningly, and she wondered if he knew she had left with Leo.

"Grinding? Nothing you haven't seen or done before, right?" She said, her voice a little strained from the effort of trying to keep her back from bowing to the ground.

His mouth made an O as the smile reached his eyes and then they turned naughty and conspirational.

"The more you talk the more I like you, Siana-ssi."

Siana rolled her eyes at him and dropped her head down slightly, to ease the tension she had in her neck from looking at him. She spoke in a sugar-saccharine sweet voice, mocking him.

"Oppa talks a lot but that doesn't make me like him more," she said, beginning to lose control of her plank position.

N gasped dramatically as Ravi burst into laughter in his corner. He literally fell about laughing. N reached out and grabbed her nearest arm and yanked it out from under her, causing her to flop unceremoniously onto her belly.

"Hey! It's in my contract, I have to talk whether I want to or not!" He glared at her with comical eyes.

"That's a diss. You've been dissed, hyung!" Ravi chortled.

Siana smiled into the floor, her face smooshed onto her other arm. She sat up crosslegged, her body warm, and pulled her sweater over her head, which made her hair come loose. She flung the sweater to the edge of the room and picked up her hair elastic which had fallen on the floor. Noting that the long-sleeved leotard she had worn underneath was already stained with sweat, she began pulling her hair into a high ponytail. She smiled to herself, enjoying the fact that she had made them laugh with her polite insult to N.

The room got quiet and she looked up to see N studying her face in the mirror, whilst she could see in the reflection that Ravi was staring directly at the back of her neck. She turned to look at him, but he quickly turned away in a twist to stretch. Then she saw N reach for his phone and scroll through it. The muscles in his forearm flicked as he stroked the screen until he found what he was looking for.

"After our time at the club, I got inspired by that island reggae sound. So I was looking for some music that I thought would go nicely with some choreography I already have in mind."

He asked her if she could play the song he wanted from her phone.

"Sure." She stood up, her thick tracksuit pants hanging low on her hips, bulky in contrast to the slim line of her torso under the skintight leotard. She ran lightly over to the small table nearest Ravi, where she had put her stuff earlier, and picked up her phone, bringing it to him to do a search.

The reggae sound of Primary's "Don't Be Shy" started playing, and she felt the groove of the reggae beat take effect on her straight away. Then Choa's quiet seductive vocals began their sensual whisper. She couldn't help but respond to the music.

She began walking back towards her position, past Ravi and towards N, her hips gently swaying and her back slightly arched as she followed the rhythm and gave it some vibe.

"This kind of groove?" She asked N, who was nodding and stood up, watching her.

She stopped, turning to face the mirror. Again, she caught Ravi watching her closely, this time his eyes on the small of her back. He averted them as soon as she noticed, but even when she wasn't looking, she could sense his gaze slowly returning to look at her. She didn't exactly feel uncomfortable, rather, curious about him.

She realised he was the only one of the boys she had caught actually checking her out.

Everyone else had, to some extent, avoided looking anywhere but her face. Even N, who watched her body as she moved, was watching for a reason that was to do with work. She stopped moving, pulling up her pants and untying and retying the string belt.

She noticed Ravi wasn't checking out her butt or her boobs, which was interesting for someone who seemed to have a problem keeping his eyes to himself. Even as she pulled up her pants, she noticed him looking at her ankles rather than her legs or backside. As casually as she could, she went up on tiptoes smoothly in a relevé, just something dancers do every now and then to test their strength and smoothness of movement.

She saw his breath catch ever so slightly.

This was very interesting.

She turned her attention to N, who was nodding his head and seemed to be going through some motions as he stared into the floor, trying to see if the choreography he had would work.

"The song has a great sound, but does it match the story you want to tell?" She asked. "Who is she talking to if she is the one saying "don't be shy"?  
N nodded, thinking. Perhaps it wasn't the best choice of song. But he loved the vibe it had, and he liked the strong feminine character given by the lyrics and the smooth vocals from Choa. He really wanted to use the song, but it seemed that it didn't have the right fit for the story he initially wanted to tell.

"Is she cute?" Siana asked, trying out a cutesy walk to the music. "Is it a straightforward seduction? Is she in heels or in sneakers?" Siana asked.

There was silence as N pondered over these questions. He noted that Siana knew how to think about the story they were supposed to tell, and that she was concerned about the character she was going to play. He liked that she was actively engaging.

"I mean, wouldn't this be a dance for one man?" She asked, her hands clasped and resting on the top of her thigh as she put her weight on one leg, standing before him. She cocked her head, looking at N seriously.

N loved seeing that clear expression, so cool and calm and serious, as she waited patiently for him to work through his answer.

She was right, this was a seduction of one man. It could not be about two men fighting over a girl.

"What if the voice isn't the girl's but one of the men's?" Ravi asked from his position, still on the ground.  
Siana and N turned to look at Ravi, who explained further.

"I mean, even though it is a female voice, the words could be from one of the male characters. Who is trying to seduce her away from her man."

N thought about that. He looked at Siana, who seemed doubtful. N played out what steps he had come up with in his head, trying to see if it could work. It all fit, because it matched the original intention. The only thing that didn't was the female voice.

"The only way is to try it," Siana said, looking back at Ravi.

N clapped his hands as if to start the class. "I like it, let's go."

Ravi came forward, and he and Siana stood behind and to either side of N and watched him in the mirror as he quickly went through each of their steps.

As they began to piece together the narrative of the story that N had created, it became clear to Siana that the good guy was clean-cut, boyish, maybe a little dismissive of the girl, and the bad boy was seductive, not entirely macho or strong, but someone who turned up right when the girl was feeling ignored, and was tempting her with the promise of complete adoration.

From her knowledge of the boys' stage personas, and what little she had come to know of them since meeting, she realised that either N or Ravi could play the good or the bad guy. There was no clear-cut line between who was boyish or macho, and who was straightforward or manipulative. It was what she liked about Vixx anyway, so she supposed that was to be expected.

After a first round of learning, they took a break, and she found a little courage to voice her thoughts, worried that she might seem to be criticising it, or analysing it when it was not her place to.

"I like how it isn't clear who is really the bad guy," she said. N looked at her in surprise. Ravi listened intently. She cleared her throat, wishing she hadn't ventured her opinion now that they were waiting for the rest of it.

"Like, how the good guy has his weakness which causes her to be discontented. And then the bad guy, he's crossing the line, but he treats her well, and they both have a connection. Maybe he just wants love but doesn't know how to do it honourably. You know? I like how there are many layers to their characters."

She stopped talking, her words hanging in the air as she let her hands flop to her sides. The boys were silent for a moment.

"What about the girl?" Ravi asked.

"She's cold." Siana said without thinking. Ravi exclaimed in surprise.

"Why do you say that?" N asked, curious.

"Well, how heartless is she to be tempted just because her guy was thoughtless? I mean, that's his flaw, but she could confront him about it instead of turning to the next guy. Her flaw is in letting someone else into the picture. If she didn't like him in the first place she should have left long ago. Or if she now wants something better, she should cut it off before cheating. She's worse than he is, to be honest. I mean, he was just lazy or thoughtless. She's selfish in a worse way."

N and Ravi looked at each other, surprised that they had to agree with her observation.

"Even if the bad guy gets her, she will ruin him too." Siana said. "I mean, that's what I think."

"You mean in the end she's the temptress?" Ravi asked.

"She's a femme fatale disguised as a sweet little thing," murmured N.

"So maybe it really is her voice - since she is the one doing the seducing?" Ravi asked.

"It makes better sense that way," N said, looking pleased. Siana smiled at him, happy that she had taken a chance by saying something. As they continued with the steps, all the various gestures and actions began to make sense, and the intentions behind each move became clear. It was as if everything that was hanging up in the air began to fall clearly into place.

They ended the session after a couple of hours, having gotten most of the choreography down.

Although N had obviously put in some risqué moves involving some touching and grabbing, their rehearsal was fairly dry, just about learning steps. She knew that after this would be the working on details, the capturing of a vibe or a feeling - and endless, monotonous repetition.

She couldn't wait.

Siana bent down to get her sweater and put it on. She realised that for a good part of the time she had spent here, she had kept her mind off Leo, although there was that lingering feeling that felt like a tightening in her gut that never went away.

She saw N and Ravi were standing close together by the door leading back into the lift lobby, talking quietly to each other. She turned off the speakers, gathered her phone and keys and walked up to them. As she approached, N looked her in the eyes, still speaking to Ravi. She smiled, meaning to usher them out so she could lock up.

"Can we go get a drink?" N asked. She found it a little worrisome that he wasn't really smiling back.

Ravi shook his head. "I'm going to go to the studio, you go on without me."

N looked at Siana, impassively waiting for her response.

"Sure," she said. She waited for them to go up the stairs, turning off the lights and locking up.

At the lobby, Ravi disappeared up the stairs after a quick goodbye.

Siana zipped up her jacket, feeling a little sticky under her leotard and sweater. N was still just in his tank top, heading towards the door with her.

"Aren't you cold?" she asked.

"I have a hot body," he smiled, watching her amusedly as she rolled her eyes at him.

"No, I really do. You can ask the boys," he said, pulling on his cardigan and folding up his jacket over one arm as he crossed both arms in front of his chest. N looked at her seriously, seeming to wait for a different reaction.

"I like how you don't ask me how the boys would know that."

Siana looked surprised, then laughed.

"I just assumed you told them whether they wanted to know or not, like you told me."

N laughed out loud suddenly, throwing back his head a little. His smile was charming, the lines around his eyes softening his demeanour.

"Whether they wanted to know or not, like you?" he nodded, still smiling to himself as they turned and began walking towards town at a comfortable pace.

"People get the idea that I force situations on them." N said, wistfully.

"Didn't I just say that?" Siana looked up at him, smiling. N laughed again, clapping his hands together and bowing his head, he was so amused.

"You do all that on purpose," she said accusingly, still smiling. N nodded, taking a breath and composing himself.

"You must have watched a lot of our shows," N countered, looking down at her sideways with a stifled smile. He watched her blush and try to hide her face in the collar of her jacket.

"I watched whatever I could," she whispered, suddenly shy. She was smiling into her jacket collar, not really liking that she was confessing her fangirling to her idol, but also feeling enormously light and giddy from putting it out there in the open.

"You were like that from the beginning, so you must have been like that at school," she ventured, trying to steer the spotlight away from herself.

N nodded. "I was born to be adored."

Siana laughed, glancing at him as he watched her in all seriousness. Another part of his schtick. She shook her head.

"You're too compassionate to be just that," she smiled up at him. N looked surprised.

"No matter what you say or do to be on top, you always let the others' wellbeing come first."

N nodded. "Yes, that is true. Does everyone think I am so lovely?" he looked at her, serious, but with a tiny smirk tugging at the corner of his lips.  
Siana laughed, amused by his unceasing confidence and sense of self.

"I mean, do all fans think like you do?" he asked.

"I'm sure they do. Even if they don't have the same thoughts I do, they all find it interesting how you interact with each other. It's like a story they want to learn more about. That's what I want anyway." She shrugged.

N nodded again. They had walked past Miami and were now almost in the centre of town. He felt touched that she had said that about him, and was happy that her direct nature allowed her to be open about her love for Vixx. N thought that his deep need for acceptance would never be filled, which was why he always covered it with the bravado he had. It kept things light, not just entertaining others, but making fun of himself before anyone else could. As a child he knew he could either submit to the cruellest of teasing, or become fabulously, outrageously, adorably, the focus of people's lives. It was his survival mode.

They walked the length of the jetty to the end, walking under the maypole of lights that looked grey and lifeless in the afternoon sun. Siana peered over the edge into the dark green waters that lapped at the stone footings.

N was a strange character, very fluid, mercurial. He put off an air of stodginess, but he took criticism and teasing well, managing to make himself look better for it sometimes. He often gave people dirty-eyed, judgy looks, but when he smiled, there was self-effacement and a sharp sort of elegance. She couldn't quite put her finger on it, but she felt he was a gentle, sensitive soul who had learned to hide his vulnerabilities with humour, bravado and talent.

He could look gloriously masculine and sensual one moment, and then soft, androgynous the next. It set the tone for the rest of Vixx, whose members mostly toed the line between being masculine and feminine - but every now and then crossed it to great effect.

There was Ravi, whose appeal to male fans was tangible. It was he and Hyuk who lead the boys in masculinity ranks, in her opinion. Even Leo came off as too pretty and soft in video clips, though she knew for sure now that what they were like on camera didn't necessarily match who they were in real life.

Ravi was a real success in his own right, and with his physicality had a masculine persona. But then, he seemed to have such a need for affection, and was often seen cooing over his brothers whenever they acted cute - and with the lyrics he wrote, she sensed that he had a need for love that was almost childlike, no matter how mature the words seemed. She could not think of a western public figure who effortlessly switched between strong and soft mode like that.

He was like a puppy, wanting to adore, rather than be adored. She supposed both men and women would be very attracted to that indeed.

Then there was N, whose sexuality she had always wondered about. Having spent what little time she had with him, she knew that he wasn't like other boys or men, or women for that matter, who would let any attraction show in their face. He seemed almost asexual, even when they were dancing together - strictly business, strictly non-threatening. She wondered if that was simply tight self-control, or whether he had no interest in romance, for want of a better word.

He sat down on the bench, primly, even though he rested against the back. He reminded her of a bird, even when he let go, he looked elegant. She wondered if they ever, ever felt comfortable enough to let their real selves show.

She looked at the horizon, taking a deep breath.

What did it matter? Even in real life, she was putting on a front for people. She would say she was fine even if she wasn't, if it would put her parents' minds at ease. She acted tough when she felt threatened and weak. She was just like everyone else in real life. And so were these boys, except their real life was recorded for all to see.

It was an enormous burden for them and required a strength of character she felt she wouldn't have.

She thought if she ever had to face the hate of a horde of fans, or even the scary hysteria of adoring fans, she would give up everything fame and success would bring.

She wanted her small dreams to play out well and inside her control, and she wanted to keep her loved ones close while she did it.

N patted the space next to him on the bench, and she went to sit down.

"What are we going to do about Taekwoon?" he asked, scaring the crap out of her.

"Hmm?" she squeaked, her eyes wide open in comedy surprise.

N leaned in closer, looking her dead in the eye.

"Our Taekwoon has fallen into such a mood lately. He was fine until last night. Right after that incident. Do you think he got scared by those gypsies?"

Siana felt like she was being questioned very, very politely by a mob boss. She understood that N was not really looking for her answer to his question - he was looking for her eventual confession. She could feel the heat rising in her cheeks and hoped he wasn't seeing her blush.

It was alarming how heavy the mood had become - and she was suddenly very aware of N's clout as a leader. She wondered what he was like if he became very angry, and shuddered at the thought. She knew that he would only expect the truth from her.

And she did not want him to know anything.

She wasn't sure how she could answer his impending questions truthfully, without giving herself away. Without telling him that she was a silly crushing fangirl who got to kiss her idol, then was dropped by him like a hot stone.

It was humiliating. And it was even more humiliating that Leo was trying to make things better for her - even though the fangirl in her felt like any attention from him was welcome. She felt at once pitied and happy, and she thought that was a strange and unhealthy place to be. It wasn't good for her ego.

She calmed herself, deciding on a step-by-step approach, readying herself if she were forced to tell the truth.

"No, he helped us take care of them." She realised N might not know of their later run-in with them after they left the club.

The club. N must have seen them leave together, after all, he was right next to her. And Panos had seen them leave. Who knows, they may have all discussed it after they were gone.

"Then dinner. That was strange," N started.

"Yes, dinner. You guys were all talking amongst yourselves. Maybe something going on between you all that I don't know about," Siana tried distraction.

N smiled, almost pityingly, at her frail attempt.

"I must admit that I was provoking him. But he was already upset before we left for Delphi. No, Siana-ssi, this is about you."  
Siana shooked her head.

"I don't think I did anything that upset him. We barely talked after the gypsies left."

N searched her face, and Siana kept it as poker-straight as she could. He sat back, a wry smile coming to his lips.

"You remind me of him right now. You seem to miss the point, which he does all the time. But I know you are more direct. You look like you are hiding something."

Siana looked away, back at the horizon. She fell back on what had always worked for her: telling the truth. But she knew there were ways to be truthful without giving away everything about it. And what she was about to say was the truth, and reflected her feelings honestly, without revealing much of herself at all.

"I don't know what happened. We played basketball, we had something to eat after you guys picked up Hongbin. It was nice. Everything was fine until the gypsies - but we barely talked that time at all. My dad did all the talking. I guess I was in shock, I don't know."

She remembered tearing up later, at the restaurant, glad that Hongbin had been there and had been discreet about her tears. She thought now that if it had been Leo, she would have held him if he had let her. She thought bitterly, after all that has happened, why would he be concerned about her tears? She stopped that thought. Except for their tragic kissing aftermath, she couldn't be certain he would react coldly to someone who needed comfort.

Ah Siana. Hongbin was right there, why hadn't she felt like she could use a hug from him? She felt confused. Maybe it was all just her hormones talking. Maybe she had no idea what she would have done if Leo had been there instead of Hongbin.

She realised that what happened after had affected the way she thought of what happened before.

"I must have been in shock, because it hit me once we got to the restaurant. You can ask Hongbin, he knows," she mumbled. She didn't notice N's eyes widen at that tidbit of information.

"Maybe he knows what was going on with Leo, he was there in the lobby too," she was hoping N would follow that train of thought and let her be.

"Anyway, shouldn't you just ask Leo yourself? Why are you asking me?"

N looked at her, weighing his options. He seemed to decide on something, and be pleased with the course of action he was about to take. Siana's realisation of the fact made her a little scared of what he was about to say.

"I am looking out for my friend. My brother. We know each other's family. We eat from the same bowls. You may not know the details, but we have had some strange encounters with fans in the past, you understand."

Siana nodded. She prided herself on not allowing her seemingly uncontrollable feelings of adoration for her idols get out of her control. Ultimately, she felt they were just normal people who were thrust into an abnormal situation which heightened their sexual appeal. That didn't give her the right to trespass on their normal human rights to privacy and dignity. And she wasn't going to lose her dignity by being another fangirl that went too far.

Siana, you Triple-T'd with Leo the moment you could, she mused, feeling herself flushing with heat. You are way past saving your dignity now, she thought to herself almost hysterically. Life was churning up her insides and she couldn't help but let it happen.

N cocked his head, seeing her sudden embarrassment. What had brought this on?

His curiosity about Leo's behaviour escalated. What had Leo done to this girl who had obviously been content to keep to herself, and had responded to their invitations to spend time together with professionalism and grace?

"What I want to ask is, what did Leo do to you?" Siana couldn't help it, she looked at N in shock. He studied her reaction for a moment.

"But maybe I should ask, what did you do to him?"

Siana gasped, her hands flying up to cover her face. She felt her chest tightening, as if it was going to explode. Those simple questions, the ones she knew he was going to ask, the ones that had been playing around in her head, the ones that got to the crux of the matter - those simple questions, now said and out there in the open, seemed to pierce her heart and squeeze it.

Did N think she had mistreated Leo?

Controlled, calm, steady, hardworking, determined, independent Siana who knew how to keep her feelings from colouring her rational actions just couldn't help it.

She burst into tears.

 

**

 

N almost jumped out of his seat.

He didn't expect this at all, not from the Siana he was getting to know. He didn't know whether to reach out and comfort her or just tell her to stop crying. He knew for certain that someone like her didn't burst into tears unless they were ready to crumble from feeling guilt.

Or, if they were hurting badly.

She stood up, smiling through her tears, half embarrassed and half stoic, her face hot and wet. She mumbled an apology in a shaky voice, and quickly turned to walk briskly away down the jetty towards the main road. He stood politely, too late, and watched her shoulders rise and fall as she tried to calm herself with deep breaths.

He couldn't let her walk home alone in that state. He ran after her, grabbing her by the elbow to make her stop.

"I'm okay, please, I want to be alone," she protested, trying to control her tears. N didn't let go.

N knew this emotional state - where the tears kept falling even if you felt your crying was over. It was as if the body needed to go through it, whether the mind or the heart wanted to or not.

"Can you tell me what happened?" N looked down at her. She finally looked up at him, her eyes red. She shook her head.

"Why not? It's obvious something did."

"You should speak to Leo," she said, simply. She had a lot she wanted to say, but she didn't think that it was right for her to go telling on Leo, when what happened between her and him was private - and for all she knew was something Leo didn't want to share.

No matter how unfair that seemed, she knew that she would probably never see him again once they left, but he and N were going to live and work together for a long time after - and had done so for a long time before she ever came into the picture. She didn't want to be the third party that whined about one to the other.

Although she didn't understand what had caused him to behave the way he did, she knew she had some responsibility in letting things go as far as they did, too.

After all, if she hadn't been willing, it would never have happened.

She could see N was concerned, but knew that besides his concern for her, there would be deeper layers of concern for Leo, and even for the group. Behaviour could be misconstrued if seen or heard of by the wrong people. She just wanted to get out of the mess of having N knowing what was going on.

"How do you know, anyway?" She asked N.

"I don't really know anything, only that Leo has been sensitive since before dinner, and that now you feel upset by my questions."

Siana shook her head, pulling away from N and folding her arms over her chest.

"In answer to your question, I didn't do anything to him." She realised that that was an admission by which N could make his own assumptions - namely that he might think she meant to imply to him that Leo was the one who had hurt her. She couldn't help what N would think. At the very least she had answered him honestly.

Unless kissing Leo was considered doing something to him that would cause him to behave the way he did. Agh she was just as confused as N was, she thought.

"Just please, speak to him. I'm okay, honestly."

She made to move past him, and he stepped aside, letting her go.

Siana walked to the main road, hoping that N wouldn't follow her again. She crossed the street and turned to see if he was behind her, but he still stood where he was, looking out to sea. She saw him rub his face with his hand and sigh. She ducked quickly into a side street and made her way towards the school compound in the outskirts of Itea, where she had played basketball with Panos and the boys the first day she was here.

They would be meeting as usual in a few hours, but she thought she needed to be alone til then. There were small places to get food nearby and she could easily use up her time til they arrived.

She texted her dad, saying she was going for a walk til she would see Panos. If Mr Kim needed anything, she could be back home in 20 minutes by foot.

She walked past the old main church, listening to the bustle of merchants and delivery trucks and people calling to each other across the street. She saw to her right further down one of the streets the little coffee roasting house she had taken the boys to the day before.

She remembered tiny Kyria Despina looking at Leo and murmuring aloud that she would pity the girl who tried to unravel his heart.

Siana thought it was funny that she had spent years doting on Leo's public persona and analysing who he seemed to be, while Kyria Despina had clocked him right off the bat. She knew right away from just one look at him that he was a reserve of complicated layers that some poor girl could get tangled up in instead of unravelling to open his heart.

Turned out that poor girl was her.

And how stunted were the beginnings of their non-relationship. Barely a kiss in, and it had soured so quickly.

Siana's mind went back to that sweet, sweet kiss. Just a moment longer, and she would have reached up and put her arms around his neck.

She sighed. Even that bittersweet memory stirred feelings inside of her that went low, deep into her gut.

She imagined what it might have been like if their kiss hadn't been interrupted - how it might have become more passionate, how she might have said something or whispered something to him, how they might have stayed under the tree or gone home together.

Was she ready for that? She sighed. She felt mentally ready for it. While their lips were locked, she was ready for it.

But now, in the clear light of day, and maybe because she had seen a side of him that had hurt her too much, she felt relief that it hadn't gone that far.

She realised that perhaps things had moved way too fast - but in that moment, she had believed that they were both of the same mind, both wanting the same thing, and both trusting that they would do right by each other.

What could have made him break out of that so suddenly?

She supposed she should wait to see what he had to say. Although she had set the ultimatum, she realised a week was a long time to wait, now that she had burst into tears in front of N. Unless he let it go, she would have to endure an uncomfortable working partnership for who knows how long. Unless things could be settled with Leo, there would be an awkwardness she didn't know how to handle.

What if N spoke to Ravi? What if the others learned all about it too?

She cringed. That they were nice boys made it worse. She valued not only how they would treat her, but their opinions of her too.If they were arses she could tell them to get lost, find another person to work with. She could stay out of their way, or deal with Mr Kim only.

She didn't really want that, though. She had made friends, of sorts. She liked Hongbin very much, who seemed to reflect her usually calm personality. And she did enjoy working with N especially, since they had clicked so well on the dance floor. She just hoped he wouldn't press her for details or try to push for some kind of resolution when she wasn't ready.

She had made friends with Leo.

But friends didn't kiss like that after knowing each other for a day. Siana felt a sob welling up, but she tamped it down quickly. Her brows were knitted as she tried to keep the sadness creeping into her expression. She exhaled loudly, feeling some of the tension dissipate.

She reached the school but walked past its entrance towards the cemetery next door to it. Her long gone grandparents were interred there, and she thought now would be a good and quiet time to visit them.

Greek custom was such that seven years after burial, the deceased's bones would be exhumed, washed in a family ritual and laid in boxes and stored in small crevices built into the long walls surrounding the cemetery perimeter.

Her father had done the ritual with his brother and sister but Siana had already begun her life alone with her mother in Malaysia, so she had not witnessed it. She was not sure she could.

She had come back to find they were no longer in the ground but on a shelf. It felt odd, coming to visit their bones - but there was a traditional significance to the ritual, and she knew what it meant to have the honour of washing the bones of one's parents.

Used to be that the children of the dead would drink from the skull of the deceased, but the need for that kind of honour had faded with modernity and enlightenment about hygiene. Thank goodness, she thought. She supposed throughout history people needed reminders about where they came from, about the transience of life, and about honourable deeds. But drinking from grandpa's skull? Ew. People could just think about it really deeply, couldn't they? She smiled to herself. If everyone did all that hard thinking, there would be no wars or intolerance. And probably, hardly anything would get done.

Ah, Siana, your mind is in overdrive, she thought whimsically.

She entered the cemetery and stopped at the tiny chapel that had been built to accommodate funerals. Outside the closed chapel was a carved wooden box with a slot for donations, which dispensed beeswax candles that smelled of honey and looked like it too. She dropped in a euro and took a candle, walking with it down a side lane in the cemetery towards her grandparents' little alcove.

When she reached it, she lit her candle using the flame from another oil lamp, and held it upside down so that wax would drip onto the rough concrete shelf their box was sitting in. When there was a tiny molten puddle of brown wax, she flipped it upright and stuck the bottom end of the candle in it. The candle stood like a brown sprout growing straight out of the concrete.

She stood quietly in front of the box, not really doing anything except looking at the pictures of her grandparents that her father had left for display and identification. She looked up, beyond the height of the wall, and could see a small hill rising up behind it. She knew the road there led up to the youth sports centre, a government facility that encouraged sports and healthy activities for the youth.

Dark green cypress trees stood straight out of the ground like pointy fingers against the brown and grey of the hill's rock face. The surroundings made for an idyllic setting, and she bowed her head, closing her eyes.

She thought, there is plenty of time for me to get where I went to go.

She opened her eyes and took a last look at the box, thinking about how, if there was an afterlife, she hoped that her grandparents were happy there. Although she wasn't religious, she did believe in something bigger than herself - a collective consciousness of sorts, where good wishes and prayers and good deeds counted for something.

She wished for her father's happiness, and hoped for him to be in good health. She wished for her mother's joy and hoped for her to be healthy. She wished for calm for herself, and hoped that she would be wise in her actions.

She turned, walking back the way she came, and exited the cemetery. It was past lunchtime and she was hungry. She walked back past the school and crossed the road where there was a restaurant owned by one of her aunty's neighbours.

After greeting them warmly, she took a table outside in the bright Greek sun and let the chill in the air settle over her.

 

**

 

N brushed past Hyuk who had opened the front door and went straight to Leo's room.

"He's asleep, hyung," Hyuk said. He looked over his left shoulder at Hongbin and Ken who were lounging on blankets and duvets on the floor by the open balcony doors. They could sense that all was not okay.

N tried the door but it was locked. He banged on it with the palm of his hand.

"Jung Taekwoon!" N yelled. He stood by the door with his hands on his hips, taking a deep breath.

Hyuk walked over and sat beside the others, who watched quietly. They rarely ever saw N like this. He could be crotchety, he could be angry, but he never raised his voice in anger at members that way. Least of all to Leo.

Ken looked at Hyuk and lifted his chin in questioning. Hyuk shrugged and looked at Hongbin, who raised a non-committal eyebrow.

They sat huddled like little rabbits in cotton bedding, watching, waiting for the drama to unfold.

Within seconds they heard the key squeak in the lock and a ruffled, puffy faced Leo squinted at N through the crack in the door.

"Cha Hakyeon. What is it?" Leo's soft voice was a husky whisper. He looked like he had jumped straight out of bed, blankets and all. He pinched the bridge of his nose and rubbed his eyes with one hand.

N glanced over his shoulder at the boys, then pushed open the door, shoving Leo back into the room. He shut the door behind him.

 

Hongbin bowed his head, nodding gravely. Leo had it coming.

Hyuk looked at Ken, who said, "Why do I feel like I'm ten years old and back home watching my parents fight?"

Hyuk smiled condescendingly at Ken.

"Sometimes, parents must talk about things that are not suitable for young ears. Frightening things, things little boys cannot handle. Like how to get rid of their noisy kids."

Ken snarled, curling his lip and swinging a pillow at Hyuk, who let it fluff his hair as he sat still, smiling.

Hongbin looked at the time on his phone. He sighed, getting up and straightening his clothes.

"I have a date with some boys in town."

Ken and Hyuk made catcalls at Hongbin. He smiled, nodding.

"I'm playing basketball, wanna come?"

Ken's eyes widened and his mouth dropped open.

"Really? Yes, I wanna go!" He jumped up, gathering the blankets off the floor and rolling Hyuk off them as he did so.

"Hyuk and I will change and come get you downstairs," Hongbin said as he took the blankets from Ken and walked towards his room to change.

Hyuk went to the kitchen as Ken sang, "We're all going on a date with boys in the town," in a kiddy voice as he left the penthouse.

Hongbin slowed as he passed Leo's room, trying to hear what was going on inside. It was quiet, so he said in a loud voice that they were going out, and quickly changed out of his jeans into some joggers.

Once he and Hyuk had gotten their sneakers on, they left, pulling the front door shut.

 

N pushed at Taekwoon, who in his slumberous state, didn't object, walking backwards in surprise until he almost fell onto the bed.

He waited as Leo finally got his balance and stood his ground, turning to him with his eyes wide and glaring. He flung his bedcovers off his shoulders onto the bed and crossed his arms, a frown on his face. He crossed his arms to stop himself from pushing back.

"What?!" What the hell had gotten into Hakyeon?

"I just made Siana burst into tears on the town jetty!" N looked furious, his mouth a thin line as he glared at Leo.

Leo felt panic and anger pull him out of the final vestiges of tiredness that was still clinging to him.

"You what? Why? What did you do?"

"I asked her that same question. You were funny all night yesterday, then you dragged her off the dance floor and disappeared and when I finally asked her what happened, she burst into tears."

Leo's initial anger that N had provoked the tears subsided, leaving only the fear that Siana was somewhere out there in tears. She had seemed so self-possessed that morning that he didn't even think for a moment that anyone could trigger that kind of reaction from her.

Then his ire rose again.

"And you left her alone?!" Angrily, Leo stepped forward, putting a hand out to reach for N's elbow.

N smacked his hand away, making Leo look at him in surprise, then with a dangerous flash of anger.

N stepped closer, matching Leo's temper with his own, and speaking in a low, menacing murmur.

"You are asking me if I left her alone when I am here to find out what you did to cause her pain in the first place? What is the matter with you? What happened, huh? She was fine this morning when we were rehearsing. Then suddenly, she couldn't take my simple questions. What did you do to her? This is not the Leo I know," N said, angry.

N realised he must have said something pertinent to Leo, because he saw that it took the wind out of his sails. Leo averted his eyes, turning away to look down at the bed. Eventually, he sat down and put his head in his hands.

N knew then that whatever it was, was serious.

He pulled on Leo's hand, forcing him to look up.

"I want to hear you say it."

"She didn't tell you?"

"No, she said you should tell me. Which means I may never find out the truth, you secretive idiot." N threw Leo's hand back at him and sat down on the bed.

He could see that Leo needed to talk, but there was no straightforward dealing with him. You could reach out to the truth, but it sidestepped, or disappeared, or turned out to be something else. That was the heartache of dealing with Leo. N rolled his eyes and shut them in pain. He had to appeal to a side of Leo that wouldn't feel like he would be vulnerable revealing the truth.

"Ok, yes or no. Answer without thinking. Did you hurt her?"

Leo laughed a sour laugh, shaking his head and looking away.

N laughed too. Even this was too hard.

"You did." N stated categorically. Leo looked back at him in protest, about to defend himself, but N held up a finger.

"Did she provoke you?" Leo looked at him with such a torn expression that N laughed again.

"Whaaat? It's a yes or no answer!"

Leo leaned on his elbows, covering his mouth with his hand. Finally, he said, "Depends-"

"You want to quantify what I meant by "provoke"?! N practically shrieked.

He smacked Leo's shoulder, which Leo let him do. Then he smacked his head and pushed him by the head so that he almost fell over. Irritated, Leo put up an arm and blocked his next attempt.

"Am I provoking you? Or not?" N continued his attack, poking Leo in the ribs, lifting a leg to try to kick him sideways. Leo found a point of balance and levered N off the bed, making him slide off in a heap.

"Alright, alright, I get it," Leo said, helping N back up.

"Taekwoon this is serious. If she was that kind, she could press charges for assault or whatever the hell "hurt" means." N watched Leo closely to see if he was getting warmer.

Leo seemed to think about it for a moment, then shake his head.

"She doesn't seem the type," he murmured, though some uncertainty remained in his eyes.

"You look as if there is that possibility though, which is why I am here. How serious is it? Did you have a fight? Did you insult her family? Did you-"

N suddenly stopped himself with a dramatic gasp.

Leo closed his eyes for a moment, dreading what was coming. He suddenly saw an image of Siana's face last night as she reached out to him after he had pulled away. He flinched as he remembered that he had stepped away from her to prevent her touching him.

She had thought he was disgusted by her - and wouldn't give him the chance to prove that she had got it all wrong. He was trying to protect her. That's what he told himself.

He finally opened his eyes, the pain of what he had inflicted on her written in his face. When he looked at N, N saw that he was hurting too.

"You were intimate," N said, "And it didn't end well."

Leo nodded. He leaned over onto his side and curled up, his back to N.

He had fallen straight asleep that morning from sheer tiredness, but while he was working all night, he kept seeing those pretty eyes looking at him in shock. He wished he could go back to that moment under the tree and do things differently. He wished he had let it play out instead of letting his doubts get the better of him. He wished he had said something, blurted out anything that was not "what am i doing?" as if he had made a bad mistake.

But he couldn't, and at the time, he really thought he was making a mistake.

Not in kissing Siana, but in drawing her into his world. In letting her believe there was a chance for them.

He frowned, unable to find the right combination of words that could adequately describe that moment when he kissed her that he thought, where can this go, where else but towards commitment, and how could i ask that of this sweet thing who wants me as badly as I want her?

"My mind is my obstacle," he mumbled into the bed.

"Yes, I agree," said N.

"Taekwoon, maybe you will be upset with my line of questioning, but I have to think of us all, and I need the facts. Were you both willing?"

Leo cringed. He knew that N was trying to clarify what he knew, but he couldn't help feeling insulted that N was considering the possibility that he would take advantage of an unwilling girl. Or even be dumb enough to do that with anyone, being a pop idol.

"You know I'm not like that," he said sullenly.

"But I don't know if she is not like that, though I think she isn't. And you may jhave been overcome by feelings. Still, I have to know. This may become an issue for the company if it doesn't settle properly. She may be fine now but what if she changes her mind later? We have had some close encounters with fans who don't know their limits," N stated matter-of-factly.

Leo could see the reason behind N's rationale, but he still didn't like what it sounded like. Discussing the moment seemed to taint it, and turn the already bittersweet memory of that kiss into something shameful, or dirty.

Leo knew that N would be persistent and would eventually dig out the information from him in one way or another, and the process of unearthing all that information would make the memory even more appalling than it was. Even beautiful memories could sour under the cold light of analysis and interrogation.

Leo sat up.

"She isn't like that, she never provoked me, she didn't do anything to me. We kissed, that's all." Leo blurted it all out before he could think twice.

N looked at him condescendingly, his eyes a look of pity.

"Thank you for your confession, but I already deduced all that from your torturous conversation. Tell me the real stuff, like why would she cry if I asked her what she did to you?"

Leo gasped, worried.

"You asked her what she did to me? You asked her like that?" Leo looked up at the ceiling in despair.

Of course, N wouldn't know what happened. But to Siana, that would have seemed unfair and accusatory. He suddenly wanted to run and find her, take her in his arms, and tell her that it was all a misunderstanding, and would she please let him explain?

"Tell me before I call your mother and make her talk to you!" N was impatient, knowing he was so close to finding out the truth of the matter. Leo was going back into his head, preventing the continuation of what should have been a natural progression in the conversation.

"Did you see her home properly?" N asked.

Leo thought about how she had disappeared into the side streets, and he had panicked, not really knowing the way home. He had a momentary concern for his own safety, being spooked by the silent, poorly lit streets. He was worried for Siana, but knew she was someplace she was familliar with, and, she was able to take care of herself.

He had decided to follow the beach back home, since he knew that he would eventually reach Itea if he walked along the coastline. He could not have been more surprised to come upon her by chance, just as she had launched a full attack on that poor man, using all her strength to attempt to shove his nose through to the back of his head.

He could not have been more relieved and glad that he had turned up at that time, because he knew the man's crazy friend could have turned violent or been triggered into action by her attack.

Then her father had come, and they had gone home in silent awkwardness.

"Are you trying to make me crazy? Even that is too hard to answer with a yes or a no?"

"I... Technically I saw her home. So yes. But I also kind of got swept up in a homeward journey which I didn't initiate. So, also, technically, no." Leo answered as frankly as he could. N gave him a look of such disgust and moral outrage that he laughed.

"No wonder you can't answer me straight. You are all bent up and crooked in the head," N tapped Leo's forehead.

Leo started giggling, trying to explain himself through his laughter. N shut his mouth with a firm hand until he stopped.

"Still doesn't explain anything. Shall I ask Siana to come join this conversation? You tell her that she is allowed to explain it, since you cannot behave like a normal human being. Tsk. Toying with us all. What are we, mice? Leo the Lion too far above us to explain himself?"

N could see that that comment got to Leo, who stopped giggling, pulling N's hand away.

"No, no. I just... you know how sometimes imagining the worst can make the worst thing happen?"

N nodded, waiting with baited breath.

"Well, I thought that I didn't want to give her false hope. I didn't want to lead her on." Leo could see how inadequate his answer was. He was kind of, sort of, not really, explaining himself.

He took a deep breath.

"I shouldn't have let it get that far. I just thought, she has no idea what she will have to face. So I stopped it."

N looked at him suspiciously.

"Stopped what?"

Leo turned red.

"You stopped what? Reading the paper? Climate change? WHAT?" N threw up his hands in despair.

"I stopped the kiss."

N stared at Leo, trying to comprehend.

"Oh I see. Not only above us, but a saint also. Wow, she must have felt like prize meat."

N looked at him, appalled.

Leo hung his head.

"DId you explain yourself?"

"I barely had time, she got upset and left."

"No, no, no, girls like that, they don't jump to conclusions unless they see it in your eyes, or you do something. You must have looked at her funny, because if you had explained yourself, she would have listened." N shook his head as he talked.

"I looked at her funny," Leo sighed.

"Oh god, you idiot! What the hell did you do? Why, why would you do that to her? She's so... fantastic. So nice."

"I was thinking-" N stood up, wagging a finger at Leo.

"No, that is not an excuse, that is your way out all the time. This was a real moment, an important moment with someone, this wasn't a music video or a guest appearance or work or fan meet. You can't say you "thought of something" and then let that thought turn your real moment into a disaster. That is not an excuse."

Leo nodded wordlessly. N was right, and he had known that the moment it had happened. It was as if he had prepared his whole life for the moment he met someone he could like or even consider being with seriously, and at the last moment, had failed, stupidly.

"You care for her?" N asked, suddenly.

Leo looked up in surprise. Of course he did, why ask that?

"Saying it is different from knowing it and not saying it. There is power in words. You make a commitment when you admit to the truth. You have to be responsible for what you say. Do you care for her?"

N waited, knowing that if Leo answered it would be a turning point for him, and N would be able to move forward knowing that Leo's intentions were clear.

"Yes," Leo said, quietly.

 

**

 

Siana had her faced turned up to the sun, her eyes closed, and her hot coffee cradled in her hands.

She was still sitting by the roadside outside the restaurant opposite the school. They had closed for siesta, but since they knew her, they had just asked her to leave the cup by the entrance before she left.

The afternoon sun was glorious, heating the ground and tempering the chill in the air.

She felt better after eating and spending some time alone, and she was looking forward to sweating on the courts with Panos. She felt that she had been dragged through an emotional turbine after all that had happened, and getting physical and working out would help her get grounded and feel herself again.

Her usual routine upon reaching Greece was to slowly get into the gentle daily life and decompress from living in a metropolis like Kuala Lumpur. Her mum still had family back in Sabah, so they often visited there - and that was the only other place where she could do the same. She thought maybe after she got back home, if her mum was willing, they could go visit Sabah for a week or two. Living in KL could be stressful, and for a seaside baby like herself who had grown up by the sea, whether it was in Sabah, or here in Itea, it had taken her about six months to acclimatise when she and her mum had moved there after the divorce. She had felt crowded by the people and the buildings.

She couldn't see the sky nor the sea, and it had made her feel like she was suffering cabin fever in the streets.

So coming to Greece felt like a ritual, yearly cleansing which she looked forward to. When she arrived, she would go about visiting all the usual places, like the morning market, the bike rides to the school and through the olive groves. Eventually she would make the rounds and see old relatives and then take long drives with her father to Delphi, Arachova and Amfissa. When all that was done, she would go visit another portside town to the west, more ancient and more lovely, called Galaxidi, which literally meant Vinegar Milk or Soured Milk.

Her father would take her on a long inland drive that would bring them back out along the coast several miles to the west of Galaxidi, near the wind farm.  
There, they would get out atop the cliff and look for the blue-purple anemone flowers, and she would pick some only to have them wither by the time they reached home.

These rituals, these comforting, repetitive routines, they were special things that cemented memories of her father, Itea and beautiful cold days in the sun, in her heart and mind.

They gave her sustenance, and they nourished her and prepared her once again for the bustle of her everyday life back home.

She brought her head up, eyes still closed against the sun, and smelled her way towards the coffee cup in her hands. Gently, she sipped the last of it, letting its nutty, earthy heat run down her throat and warm her.

She felt at once enraptured by the dance she was dancing with Leo, and at the same time as if her yearlong yearning for her peaceful rituals was truncated and stopped short.

Leo.

From the hype of meeting Vixx that was somewhat muted by his couldn't-care-less first entrance, to the unfortunate accident on the basketball court, to the wonderful, easy conversation they had had at Miami, to the strange mood he was in at dinner, to the heart-stopping words he had said to her on the dance floor and outside, and to the luscious, momentous, tongue-tangling moment under the tree... this dance was a wish come true that had spoiled the good things in her life.

She smiled. Dramatic, but true, and not necessarily a bad thing.

The only thing was, instead of being distanced from Leo, she wished that she could show him all the wonderful things that made her life good for her. She snorted. He was a pop idol who travelled the world and sang to thousands in stadiums. He bumped shoulders with seniors who had paved the way for him and was a representative for his industry and country. Would he even be interested in her long pointless drives to collect flowers that died on the way home?

Flower-killer, she called herself, smiling.

If only, if only, if only. She was a silly thing who got caught up in her fantasies and let herself be used because the object of her imaginary affections had reciprocated with his attentions.

But they were such nice attentions, Siana wailed silently, sliding down in her seat and sticking her legs out on their heels.

Why had she set herself up for torture? She had given him a second chance, but on a schedule a week from now, and it seemed like she was going to suffer from heartache waiting it out.

But she wasn't about to give in and let him explain sooner. She still had some pride.

But if the opportunity is forced upon us, well, I would be too belligerent if I didn't allow it to happen naturally. It would be plain obstinacy.

She heard her name being called from across the street and opened her eyes to find four Vixx boys waving at her.

Ravi, Hongbin, Hyuk and Ken.

Siana's heart leapt. What were they doing there? She was hoping it was a coincidence that they happened to have walked all the way out to the school on their own, without a car, without their manager.

She waved back, a little wary. She saw Hongbin looking at her seriously, a small smile on his lips. Ravi was chatting with Hyuk, and Ken... well there was that smile again, like she was the loveliest thing he had ever seen.

She felt like a sunflower basking in the light of the glorious sun. It was quite magical the effect Ken's attention had on her, surprisingly so, since she had never really sensed that about him til she saw him in real life.

She remembered him heading towards her in the studio when they had first met, and how he had made her feel like she was water, and he was a man dying of thirst.

But her concern was for whether Leo would notice her, or do something that would make her feel that same way. He hadn't.

Then she remembered being chased up the stairs by Ken, who had started it as an ice-breaker, but she had caught his wolfish glances at her body when she had spun around to look at him suddenly.

Those looks hadn't made her heart race or her breath stop like they did when Leo looked at her like that.

She wondered why she was thinking this way. She didn't like comparing people, especially not two who showed interest in her, who were close like brothers.

Ken beckoned, pretending she was saying no, then beckoned again, cutely, begging her to come join them. He was adorable, and he made her feel adorable.

She realised why she was comparing them.

Between Ken and Leo, she suspected being with Ken would be fun, harmless and charming, the opposite of what she now knew getting involved with Leo was like: complicated, unpredictable. Hot.

And much as she had always thought she would want the Ken option, she was certain that, even though he seemed the easier choice, she was just not interested in Ken.

That realisation made one thing supremely clear: she wanted Leo.

She got up, tidied her place and put the coffee cup by the door.

As she crossed the road, she thought to herself, way to make things hard for yourself, Siana.

 

**

 

Hongbin watched Ken out of the corner of his eye, and noticed Siana's response from across the street was polite, but lukewarm. He could see that, although Ken had started out turning on the charm almost out of habit, it was he who was getting charmed by Siana, as they all were, but perhaps was believing too much that his attentions would be reciprocated.

Hongbin hoped that Siana wouldn't lead Ken on, even if unwittingly. He hoped she had that extra sense that many didn't - to do the right thing at the right time, not too late, not too cruel.

He felt she would, and watched her carefully as she crossed to meet them. She was smiling sunnily back at Ken, but he felt the smile didn't quite reach her eyes. In fact, he got the impression she like a close friend about to drop some bad news, all ready to be business-like about it.

Hongbin looked at Ken, who was smiling almost dopily at her. Oh, he hoped she was kind about it.

Siana reached their side and looked at everyone, asking what they were doing here.

"Panos asked us to join the game," Hyuk piped up.

Siana realised that must have happened at the end of the night last night. It reminded her that maybe they were aware of her leaving with Leo. She sensed an opportunity to get things straight with Ken.

"Oh, I didn't know. I left early with Leo," she stated, baldly, hoping she didn't go red or get emotional.

She looked at Hongbin in the eye, trusting that he would be as sensitive and knowing as he had proven to be at dinner. He remained pokerfaced. She looked at Ravi, who seemed surprised. She saw that Hyuk was keeping his face non-reactive like Hongbin. When she finally looked at Ken, she saw innocent eyes wide with surprise.

"You left with hyung? Why?" She was trying not to read his expression as crestfallen, but rather as curious. She felt awful, as if she were a cat about to play with a wounded bird.

"He walked me home. But my dad picked us up before we got there." She paused a moment, letting Ken absorb the information. It was enough information to give a big hint, but was also somewhat commonplace, an observation of polite behaviour on Leo's part. She hoped there wouldn't be more questions, because she didn't want to have to spell it out to Ken that he could be cute all he liked, as long as he didn't expect it to go further than companionship.

Ken smiled, flirtily.

"Ooooh, alone time with hyung!" Siana hoped it didn't show in her face that he was absolutely right, and more.

"Did he keep you safe from monsters?" he asked, playfully.

"He did actually. We bumped into those gypsies again. Thank goodness he was there," Siana said, trying to drive the point home without driving too hard.

"What! Are you okay?" Hongbin asked, concerned.

Siana nodded, saying clearly, "Leo was with me when I needed help."

She felt like she was all kinds of liar.

She let that statement sink in, watching Ken's smile as he nodded in understanding. She smiled too, trying not to appear pitying, but warm, neutral.

Ken's smile seemed to waver, but it remained. "Ah. I see. Leo Hyung was there for you."

She wanted to hug him, but that would be the worst thing to do at that moment.

"That's when I called my dad," she said, "And I think he was grateful Leo was there. I think he showed him the studio."

Ravi nodded thoughtfully.

Siana felt she could not go any further with it, so she changed tack. Looking up brightly at Ken, she asked, "You ready to get hurt?" She hoped that her high-handed, flirty banter would signal to him that between them, it could be just about fun and nothing else.

Ken smiled back, nodding vigorously. She noticed that all the seduction had gone out of his flirting - he seemed to get the hint. He was playing along, and she sensed that he had accepted the possibility that she might not be interested in him.

She felt relief that he had taken the hint so graciously, even if he was unaware that he was doing so. She didn't think he had a conniving bone in his body, and it was highly plausible that his good nature lead him to act this way almost without thinking. Even if it was going against what he wanted.

She realised it was safe to joke with him, maybe even flirt back more, but that she could easily cross the line into being a tease. So she wanted to keep things light and upbeat, easy for the boys to be comfortable with her around.

She led them to the unlocked door in the court perimeter, and they made their way to the bleachers on the side, partially covered by the school building rooftop. Along the wall of the building were various lockers, and she punched in a combination code in one of them and opened to reveal a basketball.

She tossed it to Ken, who began dribbling, running around the ball in a comedy mime. She could see he was good, and looked forward to playing.She heard the door creak open and saw the welcome sight of Panos walking in, across the courts.

All the boys turned, a couple of them wolf whistling as Panos flexed his way towards them. She laughed. They had obviously clicked after she had left last night, and that made her happy. Amidst the high-fiving and chest-bumping, she felt happy to be towered over by all these boys, happy that her cousin and her new-found friends were friends, happy that they were about to drop some heavy on each other on the courts.

They chose teams: she and Ken on one team, Panos and Hyuk on another.

After a quick warm-up it was time to play ball.

 

**

 

Hongbin and Ravi sat on the bleachers, feeling the late afternoon sun warm their faces.

"Hongbinnie, I was working in the studio after dance rehearsal today. Leo-hyung wrote a song."

Hongbin looked at him in surprise.

"You listened to it?" he asked.

"Yes. It's nice. About a love that cannot be." Ravi shook his head. "Our hyung has always been a softie."

Hongbin smiled. He knew Ravi was no different. Despite all the achievements and the name he had made for himself as an up and coming rapper-songwriter, Ravi was just another puppy who wanted to be loved. All of them were.

Ravi shifted closer, nestling his shoulder against Hongbin, and looked at him with those puppy dog eyes.

"Is there something going on that I have missed? Because I feel like a movie started playing around me and I'm the only one who has no clue."

"That's true. You and Ken. No clue." Hongbin laughed. He watched Ken play, his ability at basketball unsurpassed by any in the group. He was playing hard, just as everyone was. Hongbin knew that Ken would probably be fooling around rather than trying to win, if Siana hadn't made if clear to him that he was being let down nicely, discreetly.

Hongbin had a new-found respect for Siana. She had enough experience to know that being thoughtless about handling the Ken situation could jeopardise their acquaintance. He could tell that she was the kind to care for sustaining relationships well. She was level-headed, even when he had figured that things had gone badly for her the night before.

Hongbin didn't know the details, but he guessed that she and Leo had gotten somewhat intimate, and that somehow, things had gone awry.

He was only guessing when he thought that she wouldn't have been the cause of their falling out. But then Hongbin thought, even if she did do something wrong or make a mistake, she was worth getting over it. Hongbin hoped that Leo realised how lucky he was.

It was hard enough coming across someone to be attracted to within the industry. Firstly, there was the unspoken agreement to keep all relationships in the idol industry strictly business-like, or platonic. Secondly, it was hard to be attracted to someone who may be even more hungry for fame than yourself. Thirdly, if there was dislike for your romantic ties, the relationship could fail horribly from the backlash. Girls got it the worst, since fans and media alike would attack their beauty, age and talent, something the boys didn't get judged for in the same way.

Hongbin suspected that Leo might have pulled back for just that reason. But, he didn't think that Leo would have gone far enough to warrant pulling back. If he did, if he had somehow lost control and gone further than he would normally allow himself to go - well that signalled to Hongbin that he was falling very hard for Siana.

And he could see why. She was talented, hard-working, smart and funny, obviously loved her father and her home, and was brave and spunky to boot.

Ravi followed Hongbin's eye line and realised he was looking at Siana.

"Oh? Is Siana interested in Ken?"

Hongbin rolled his eyes. "No."

Ravi gasped, "Are you interested in Siana?"

Hongbin looked at Ravi with pitying eyes. "No, I am not."

"Oh, you think she isn't all that."

"That's not what I said. She is great. I'm just not interested in her in that way."

"Why not? She's cute. She can dance. She's not shy," Ravi said, thinking of the rehearsals that morning. As usual, N had choreographed something that was distinctly his flavour, and it involved a certain amount of coquettishness both from the female and male dancers - as well as a lavish amount of loaded looks, gestures and holds.

Ravi's tastes leaned more towards street rather than narrative dancing, but he appreciated that the routine would go down very well with the fans. It satisfied both the performance and fan-service commitments that they had at concerts.

He was a little put out that N had decided without asking that he should be part of the new routine, but he had enjoyed working with Siana, who had given her ideas freely and even argued with N about certain points. And N, who usually brooked no argument when it came to his ideas, was surprisingly flexible and accepting of her points.

He wondered what it was that N saw in her that had opened him up to her as an equal.

Then she had taken off her bulky top and started tying up her hair.

In the middle of his stretching, he saw how the nape of her neck bent forward as she stroked her hands upwards, bringing her hair up into a high ponytail - one of his favourite hairstyles on a girl. She had tied it expertly with deft fingers, flipping it out as she finished and catching him looking at her.

Ravi just didn't stare at girls. But somehow, he had let himself get caught by someone he really had barely noticed til that moment. Or at least, thought of as attractive. Even so, he was not as much attracted to Siana, as he was to the graceful shape of her delicate neck. And the beautiful structure of her strong, slim ankle.

He wasn't one to admit to people that he might have a fetish for them. Not that he thought there was anything wrong with it - just that people didn't really want to understand. He didn't think it was any different from adoring someone's eyes or smile, but past experience told him to to let on too much about what made him weak.

So he felt uncomfortable being caught staring.

Even on the dance-floor the night before, he had felt uncomfortable dancing with her friends who had joined them, because it was a situation he was unsure of. He tried to take his cue from N, who was having a great time with Siana, but then the night ended and before he knew it they were piling into the car as Panos waved goodbye.

It was Panos who had told them that Leo had left, since no one seemed to have noticed him leaving. Which was not really unexpected from Leo. It seemed like antisocial behaviour, but the boys all knew that when Leo had enough of something, he left. If he could.

Ravi suddenly looked at Hongbin, who was watching him with a small smile on his face.

"Does Leo like Siana? Is that why he left early? Did they leave together?" He gasped, his hand flying to his mouth, then leaned in to whisper to Hongbin, "Is the song about her?"

He glanced over at Siana. He liked seeing her going hard, winning her priority. That was definitely a turn on for him. But his attraction for Siana was limited to individual parts of the whole, and there was nothing that he felt for her other than his own peculiar attraction for those individual parts.

He wondered what it was that Leo desired in Siana. Apart from the obvious, which was that she pretty, amiable, smart... Ravi supposed that there just must have been something. Something that clicked between Leo and Siana. It couldn't be explained, it was just real.

"You didn't notice they left together?" Hongbin asked. He had thought it was obvious. But he supposed, he was watching Leo who had suddenly walked away from him. And N must have had an idea, since he was next to her. Possibly Hyuk who was observant to a fault. Hongbin smiled. If anyone would fail to notice, it would be Ken and Ravi.

"But, can he do anything if he is interested? We're leaving just before Christmas. Is there any point, unless it's just a fling?"  
Hongbin shrugged. "Leo is not the type for a fling."

"But he wouldn't start something serious if he knows it's not going anywhere," Ravi said confidently. He glanced at Hongbin, who was looking thoughtful. Ravi leaned in closer, curious.

"Would he?" Ravi whispered.

He hoped Leo wouldn't. It was so easy to feel the need for a special someone to have for yourself, to be there for you when the work got tough, or the coworkers or the public got too much. Someone to talk to who wasn't part of that world, someone who would listen and encourage you. Someone who cared.

It was easy to give in to the need for love. Easy to give in to the need for touch, for talk, for temptation.

And much harder to extricate yourself from the life of someone you have fallen for, because you may never see them again.

Ravi wondered if Leo had it in him to fall in love with someone so deeply that he could propose that they be together for life. The reality of the situation was that the girl in question would have to face the worst of judgments, being looked down upon for being too short, too tall, too pale, too dark, too skinny or too fat. Or just for being the lucky one that caught Leo. The hate, the judgment... Ravi knew it could all be too much. The girl's life could be disturbed so much that she could come out of it scarred.

And it was a lot to ask of someone he barely knew to give up her life as she knew it, to become a pop idol's girlfriend and face the misery of online criticism.

Ravi could see it was not going to go anywhere.

So he was hoping against hope that Leo had not started anything he wasn't prepared to finish.

He looked at Siana laying up the ball and shooting. Everything that he had learned or noticed about her personality and her actions, brought Ravi to one conclusion.

She was a wonderful creature.

If Leo could resist her charms he would have to be a superhero.

 

**

 

Panos could see Siana was struggling.

Oh, she was playing well, and seemed to be holding her own against him and Hyuk. But he could see there was something on her mind, and it was bugging her.  
He had seen Leo walk over to her last night, and was surprised to notice his expression as he crossed the dance floor straight towards her. At first he thought it was concern, maybe even anger. It put Panos at the ready. Maybe Leo had cause for concern, or maybe he was angry at her for some reason, but Panos was ready to get to her side in either case.

He had glanced at Siana, noticed that she was in her own little world, dancing. He had often seen her like this, it was something she got into while on the dance floor. He could see she was stirred up, and noticed her tear falling. Panos knew her well enough to know that it was a cathartic process for her , that the music, and the excitement, and her depth of feeling when she got into her own headful of dreams, sometimes caused her to well up out of the blue. He teased her about it, but she called him on it - because he was exactly the same.

But when he looked back at Leo, he realised it was no longer concern or anger he was seeing, but rather, that singular, penetrating focus that a man on the prowl had. He knew then that Leo was, for want of a better word, on the hunt.

Panos didn't know if the attraction was one-sided, but he certainly wasn't going to stand and watch his cousin get harassed if she wasn't interested. He started making his way towards her, trying to get there in time.

When he saw Leo reach her and grab her hand, he stopped. The look on Siana's face was one of welcome, even though she seemed shy of Leo, or maybe from being caught at an emotional moment.

For the first time in all his years of knowing her, Panos felt he was intruding on a private moment.

But he wanted to be sure she was alright, so he watched as Leo bent down to speak to her. Flashing lights blinded him so he couldn't tell what Leo was saying, nor what her expression was as she was partially obscured by him. When he straightened up, Panos could see that whatever he had said, she was happy about it.

Then, Leo had pulled her behind him as he made his way towards the exit with her in tow.

Panos happened to catch Hongbin's eye as Leo and Siana walked out. He knew that Hongbin had witnessed the whole thing too, and saw that on Leo's side, there was someone concerned for him too.

Panos came off the dance floor and went over to Hongbin, who was standing by the bar, his drink in his hand, and Leo's forgotten bottle on the counter. Panos signalled to the bartender, who, annoyingly, was scrolling through his phone as the other bartender looked over his shoulder.

"Hey, you're working, put that away!" Panos yelled over the noise at him. The bartender was experienced, but had only just started working for his father's club, and Panos didn't like his superior attitude. He also put off a bitchy vibe which Panos personally detested, but knew that patrons sometimes liked. He asked for another bottle, looking at Hongbin as he did.

"Something going on that I don't know about?" he asked, hoping that Hongbin wouldn't give him the run around and give it to him straight.  
Hongbin smiled, pausing as he waited for the bartender to give Panos his drink. He was about to speak, when he paused again, smiling and looking down at the counter. Panos realised that Hongbin was aware of the proximity of the bartender to them, and probably valued discretion over the chance to speculate. Panos looked at the bartender, and was annoyed that he was loitering near them instead of giving them space.

Panos was familiar with this behaviour from having Siana as his cousin, as well as knowing her mother briefly, and from being educated by Siana as soon as she felt he needed to be educated.

The smiling was politeness, but probably hid irritation that they were not being given privacy.

"It's too noisy, let's go to my office," Panos said. He signalled to the tender to put the drinks on his tab, and then he and Hongbin walked towards the exit, but veered left into an office door that stood near it.

Inside, there was a pool table, a refrigerator and a desk behind which were a filing cabinet and some large pictures of himself with his father and brother. Behind one of them there was a safe for cash and documents.

Panos didn't live here, but there was a bed for times when he had to stay very late and was too tired to go home. His father being in the hotel and hospitality industry, had brought them up around him, at work. It was a life Panos was used to, and liked. He had independence, a flexible schedule and had become a bit of a local logistical expert who helped arrange on the ground transport and entertainment when big events happened in the area.

He was much older than Siana, almost thirty. He had served his military commitments to his country at a very young age, and had come out ready for anything. Because his father needed him, and because he had had such rigorous training, he fulfilled the role of capable deputy very well. His older brother, who had remained in school and become the family accountant during his two-year absence, had only just gone into his military service in the last year, having waited til the last possible moment so that he could be by his father's side while their business was growing.

His brother had clamped a hand on his shoulder and told him he was proud of him before he had left, and that he would do a good job of looking after their dad in his absence. Then they had cried like babies and waved goodbye to each other. Panos smiled. Ah, Greeks. Any reason to cry was a good reason to cry. It let out those feelings, brought people closer, humbled the ego and then made one feel light, free.

So when he ushered Hongbin into the office, he felt he was taking on a new role, that of an older brother to Siana, one that he never really felt he played, even though she was younger. She always put herself on his level, and had earned her right to be there. She was mature, capable and always ready to accept a challenge.

But now, he was concerned for her in a way that he had never been. There was worry for her emotional safety now, and he was always one to deal with an emerging challenge as soon as he found it.

Hongbin eyed the pool table as he walked around it. Panos naturally started setting up, bringing out the only two warped cues that he had, along with a tiny nub of chalk that he had made last for a year. Hongbin took one, admiring it with a critical eye.

"You must love these very much not to let go of them," he joked.

"They're family," Panos joked back.

He let Hongbin break, then took his first shot, waiting patiently for Hongbin to start talking.

He missed, and watched as Hongbin took a shot. Despite the lack of space and the twisted cue stick, his playing action was smooth and he managed to pocket two balls before letting Panos have a go.

As Panos surveyed the table, Hongbin sat on a bar stool and started talking.

"Leo and I found Siana and Mr Mikhalis being confronted by two beggars that had walked in off the street. She managed to send them off without any violence," Hongbin laughed, still rather impressed by her behaviour.

Panos looked up, concerned. He had heard of a few new gypsies roaming in the area, but they tended to keep to themselves and never ventured into people's homes. The club was rather isolated, and he had to make sure patrons weren't harassed or felt unsafe, so he liked to keep his ear to the ground about things like this.

"Anyway, seemed she was fine, and Mr Mikhalis invited us for dinner. Since then, I feel Leo has been very concerned for her safety."

"But," Panos interjected, eyeing Hongbin carefully, "That was not about her safety out there. They left to have some privacy. It is a rather sudden development, no? Haven't you all only met yesterday?"

Hongbin smiled, nodding. What could he do except agree?

"They spent some time together alone after we played basketball today. After that, we saw the incident with the gypsies. Between dinner and now, Leo has been very... on edge. Intense."

Hongbin reminded himself that N had seemed to cotton on to the attraction between Leo and Siana, and had added fuel to the fire by teasing during dinner and pushing for Leo to make a move.

Hongbin wasn't sure if N's method was entirely the best method, but he could see that it had had the desired effect. Leo had made a move, whatever that turned out to be.

Hongbin knew that, like himself, N was excited for the possibility of a romance for Leo. It was as if he was going to test the waters of having a relationship, on behalf of themselves.

He knew that most of the others wanted to keep work and personal lives separates. And since their work took up most of their personal lives, they simply chose not to look for love. But Hongbin felt that whatever the trials and tribulations that relationships brought, there was no perfect time to go through them. If you couldn't go through the tough times with your loved one, then what kind of relationship was that? The whole point of a relationship was to have someone to care for you and to care for when times got hard.

Hongbin wasn't searching for someone as such, but he felt that he was open to the eventuality and that he wouldn't put his love life on hold in order to protect himself and his love from the outside world. He was sure that N was the only other who shared his opinion - except that N wasn't really wishing to find someone, he just wished for that for others.

He knew Leo wanted to focus on his work, and had publicly stated that he would not hide his relationship if he were to fall in love. However, since making that statement, the boys had all gone through some form of public vilification, either individually or as Vixx. Leo, particularly, being so enigmatic, had a following that could only be described as possessive.

They would find themselves at the mercy of female hosts or guests who felt no qualms touching them inappropriately, or making suggestive comments. As boys and men, they felt pressured to laugh it off. It was all easy to cope with on camera, but once the cameras turned off, it was much harder to keep an appropriate distance with people making unwanted advances towards them, whether verbally or physically, even.

Hongbin knew that the girls in the industry were going through similar situations themselves, some of them coping better than others. The only difference was that culturally, they were more vulnerable. It was up to their individual characters to deal with it as they could.

Unfortunately, they didn't feel they could do much to buck the system - after all, they were trading on sexual attraction as well as music. And because they were all pretty much company executives in an odd musical industry, they had to consider the company's interests at all times.

There was enormous pressure on them for being pretty boys, and although Hongbin got his share of unsolicited attentions, he felt that Leo in particular was prone to it because people felt he was softer than he really was.

Leo was lucky he looked cold and distant, because that probably was his first unwitting line of defence against errant fans and industry peers who mistook his natural bitch resting face for anger or disgust.

Hongbin sighed. All he could do was hope for the best for Leo.

I approve of Siana, you may proceed, Hongbin thought to himself, pointlessly.

He was sure they were proceeding quite well without his permission.

 

**

 

Ken didn't expect to be breaking a sweat, but he was enjoying playing ball nonetheless.

He knew when he was being let down, and took the hint graciously. Siana's style kind of made him fall in love with her a little bit, but he knew there wasn't enough going on between them to warrant him getting obsessed over it.

Ah, puppy love. I'm full of it, he thought, wistfully.

But Leo hyung... so there was something going on there between him and Siana? If so, that was some fast moving, hyung! Ken thought to himself proudly.  
No wonder Leo had cut off his attempts to question him about Siana when they were hanging out with Kkomae that afternoon.

"Off limits," he said quietly to himself as he received the ball from Siana.

Leo-hyung's very words. He took aim and shot, springing up high into the air before Panos could react in time.

He scored, and Siana high-fived him with both hands. The urge to hold on and pull her into a bearhug was strong, but Ken let go, smiling at her.

Leo's words suggested that he had already become possessive about her, barely one day after they had arrived.

Ken felt a little sad that his immediate attraction to Siana's bubbly, sporty character had to go unrequited. But he knew that that was ll it was. He certainly didn't feel there were any feelings deeper than that. Or none that made him want to tell people she was off limits.

Ken knew what that feeling was like. The feeling that you wanted someone all to yourself, even if that person wasn't yours to begin with. He understood that anyone could feel that, even relative strangers.

This was what he believed fans felt. It was like agony. Wanting someone you couldn't have. It could drive people crazy with jealousy and make normally reasonable people irrational and out of touch with reality.

Oh yes, he had definitely been there.

It was a distraction and if things weren't going well or fast enough, and could eat up the insides of even the strongest person. One could literally become love-sick.

So Ken did have some reservations about Leo going into something when there was so little time that could be spent together. How fast did Leo Hyung want to move? Because there was barely enough time to get to know each other, let alone indulge passions.

Ken avoided Panos' offensive reaches, swivelled neatly and laid up another shot, scoring again, much to Siana's delight.

She punched Panos playfully in the shoulder and laughed. Normal gestures, everyday actions - but to an amorous onlooker, those very things became exciting, meaningful and suggestive. If he were Leo instead of Ken, seeing her do those little things would make her seem more fresh, vibrant, beautiful. Ken knew that being in that state made separation very painful.

It left a hole in your heart, a gap in your world - that could take weeks or months to get over if you have fallen hard. And he suspected Leo had. All because of those words.

Off limits.

Ken thought that maybe Leo was telling himself she was off limits too, at that time. Poor Leo Hyung, he couldn't help but fall into that pit called, for want of a better word, love.

They resumed playing, listening to Hyuk's not-so-gentle joking that maybe they should just let him play on his own as he was doing quite well winning by himself. He loudly complained that it was hard to be perfect on the courts AND look good. Amidst laughter they managed to play a rather boring game where Ken single-handedly put the ball in the net a few times in a row.

They came off the court feeling a little unsatisfied, even though they all felt they had run around a lot.

"I try to keep positive, but losing so easily makes me very bitter," joked Panos. Hongbin and Ravi laughed. Ken looked over and noticed Ravi admiring Siana's form with a surreptitious glance.

"How do I describe feeling bad about winning?" Siana smiled. "I barely did anything."

Hongbin shrugged, looking a moment too long at Siana, Ken thought. He smiled and twirled the ball on his finger.

"Just go with it, it will eventually feel good," he said cutely, making Siana roll her eyes as she glanced at him, laughing.

Oh, she was charming.

He felt like he was one of many moths gathering around her flame, and while he could, he would enjoy whatever form of attention he could get from her, even if just as a guest at her stayhouse.

Ken felt that he understood fans very well. They liked interaction, they liked being noticed, they wanted to share pictures, they wanted to be acknowledged. They wanted to feel their adoration was being received, even if there was no hope of reciprocation. Of course there were some who couldn't control themselves, but they were few and far between.

It was exactly the same situation. Except that, whether they knew it or not, Siana was their Vixx, and Vixx were all infatuated in one form or another.

And interesting place to be in close quarters, away from the public eye, on a time limit.

Ken smiled, letting his gaze linger on her sweet smile. He looked up to see Hongbin and Ravi watching him too.

This holiday was going to be very interesting indeed.

 

**

 

Leo ignited the burner and attempted to make Greek coffee as N watched him like a hawk.

"What are you doing?"

"Making coffee Greek-style."

"Where did you get all this?" N looked at the packet of coffee and the neatly laid out tiny cups on the counter.

Leo concentrated on getting the quantity of coffee right. Did Siana say two spoons per cup? Or one spoon per two cups? He realised he hadn't paid any attention at all when she was teaching them how to make it. He had been busy being very aware of her hands, her voice and her proximity. He hazarded a guess and put a spoonish portion for each cup. He nodded his head confidently.

Wait, how much water did he need?

Still waiting for an answer, N turned and walked out of the kitchen, going to the small sofa by the fireplace and flopping down into it.

"Now I know how my mother feels," he sighed.

There was a knock on the door, then he heard a key turn in the lock. It had to be Kkomae.

Sure enough, he and Min Seok came round the corner, bearing papers and wearing house robes.

N watched as they settled in the sofa opposite and Kkomae started spreading out the documents he was holding.

"Miss Siana dropped off a suggested itinerary."

N saw Leo go still, listening.

"That was quick," N said.

"Yes and I have planned out our stay."

"Shouldn't we wait for the others to decide?" Leo called from the kitchen.

"NO." N and Kkomae answered together.

Nothing would ever get decided with the eight of them trying to meld opinions.

"We will keep it free this week. So you guys will be rehearsing and everyone else can relax. We will visit restaurants, cafes and shops around here. This weekend, a day trip to Arachova which will end with hang-gliding after lunch in the mountains. There's not enough snow for skiing yet, but we might be able to go before we leave. Next week, some drives to nearby towns and locations. If you guys are up to it we can do some photoshoots."

N nodded. It was always good to have some fresh images, even if they had no official promotions on, which could be used for interim activities.

"We can go to Meteora, the famous hanging monasteries, but we need to stay overnight. There is Athens, the Acropolis, Plaka and shopping. And if you want nightlife, there are events around here but lots to do and see in Athens."

N nodded again. He heard Leo gasp and turned to see the coffee overflowing, pouring out of the tiny pot he was boiling, extinguishing the flame in the process. He jumped up, alarmed. Leo stepped back, holding the pot in one hand, watching the dark brown liquid drip over the counter and onto the floor.

"Aaagh," Leo grumbled, dumping the pot into the sink. He tried to turn off the gas but burnt his hand on the gas switch which was hot from being covered in liquid.

"You okay? Come on, let's just go out and get a coffee. You guys want to come?" He asked Kkomae and Min Seok.

Min Seok looked sheepish.

"We haven't bathed yet."

"Well, neither have we. Let's get ready and meet downstairs."

Kkomae and Min Seok nodded, getting up and gathering all the papers. N went over to help Leo mop up the coffee. The smell of drying, burnt coffee was strong, so he opened the windows to let the kitchen air.

As they left, N shouted out to Kkomae.

"We should bring Siana so she can help with any translations from Greek."

Kkomae shouted his approval and they left.

N looked at Leo, who had been mopping up the coffee with a tiny dishrag. Leo squeezed out the rag and rinsed it, repeating the process. He smirked and looked at N as he bent down to make sure the floor was clean.

"You know I can just see Siana anytime, there's no need to force the situation by asking her along with us."

"But you are too much of an old man to go against your own promise to stay away. Even after a week is over you might do that. So... I forced the situation."

Leo shook his head ruefully.

"You were coming on a little strong last night too. Were you trying to make me hit you?"

N leaned against the counter and crossed his arms as he watched Leo wipe down the floor thoroughly and then turn to clean up the cabinets.

"I was trying to see how much Siana was on your mind. If you didn't already know, she was all over it - you care a lot. My advice is, whether you pursue the matter or not, tell her what she has to look forward to."

Leo stood and dropped the rag into the sink. Before he could rinse his hands, N caught his wrist and looked him in the eye.

"All the good stuff. And all the bad stuff. Make sure she knows what she is in for."

Leo shook his head.

"It will just sound like I'm making excuses."

"It will be the truth, whether she believes you or not. You can't pull away without an explanation. She should know why. Don't force me to tell her myself."  
Leo washed his hands, nodding. N had a point, but he knew explanations just sounded like excuses.

"Okay, how about this. You let Siana be until we go this weekend. When you see her again, ask yourself what you feel. And please, please, if you have any feelings for her, be honest with her. If she can't take your honesty, maybe you would be better off without her. So don't talk yourself out of doing it, okay?"

Leo shrugged. It sounded fair.

He just wondered if he could really stay away for almost a week.

 

**

 

Siana was annoyed.

She had spent almost a week dancing with Ravi and N and had only just been told that she was "invited" to go hang-gliding with them tomorrow.

N hadn't mentioned any details but insisted that she should accompany them as they felt they might not be able to communicate properly - and safety was an issue. She felt obliged, although she smelt a rat. Of course, Leo would be there.

They had just finished repeating a particularly difficult part of the routine. There was a complicated maneuver where Ravi, who had stolen her away from N, held her in his arms and leaned her back against N's back, until he was hunched over and she lay across his back as if he were a bed or a table.

She had to put her weight on N, which was fine, but Ravi had to stay close, which made it unbalanced. She kept feeling like she would teeter off her feet and slide off to one side, pulling Ravi down with her.

They tried it with N almost down to the ground, then with him practically upright - but they couldn't get the balance just right.

The only way she could stay on, and with Ravi still in her embrace, was to have Ravi hold her very tight. But that meant that N would be taking both their weight, and also that Ravi no longer had balance either. He had to be the one carrying her weight so that she could lean back without falling over.

Plus, it would look weird.

Within the space of a week, I have become the heavy salad in an unbalanced dance Vixx sandwich, she thought drily.

She could see N was trying to think of an alternative. Perhaps he was considering changing it. She didn't know if they were oblivious to the obvious solution, or if they had considered it but dismissed it for some reason - but as she had said before, the only way was to try it and see if it worked. She felt it was obvious what needed to be done.

She gestured for them to try again, pulling into Ravi's embrace as N got into position. She let Ravi push her up against N's back, and could feel N starting to take her weight, keeping his back straight til the last moment, and using the power in his legs to receive her.

At the moment when the balance began to tip over to N, she lifted a leg and wrapped it around Ravi's hip, or tried to, since he was that much taller than her, all the while looking in the mirror to check their positions. It was just a move from ballroom dancing which she was familiar with.

She could only tuck her pointed foot behind his knee, resting the outside of her leg against the swell of his calf muscle. She saw Ravi react, but he schooled his features almost instantly, and she could see he knew this was how it would work. He changed his stance so that he was in more of a lunge, which shifted his position slightly to the back, opening up his body towards the audience as he twisted a little, taking all his weight and some of hers, onto one leg. Automatically, his hand came up to hold her leg under her knee, and as they settled into position, his bending forward made her knee come up high onto his hip, so that her calf was now resting along the back of his thigh.

N, who had also swivelled a little to face the audience three-quarters-on as he felt Siana's weight shift, suddenly saw their new formation in the mirror, and was happily surprised.

They were in a three-way tango suddenly, and it all made sense.

N applauded, ending the practise. Siana let Ravi pull her upright, and after the intensity of the hold and the expression, was charmed to find he smiled like a shy little boy. He and N chatted about how much better it worked that way.

They were ecstatic, because they finally found a solution, and it had acquired a depth of expression that it didn't have earlier. They could draw out the moment as she slid her bent leg higher, allowing Ravi to have a moment where he would be facing the audience with a girl in his arms, and his hand lingering on her leg.

Because the action involved N, it accentuated the story of deceit and seduction. It wasn't a private moment between two lovers, but expressed the pain of jealousy, adultery and lies.

But N was worried that this could actually put off the fans, rather than entice them into the story. Would they mind seeing Ravi so intimately entangled with a girl, even if she turned out to be evilly manipulating him in the story?

"I like it, it works," Siana, said, simply.

Ravi, who had maintained full commitment to the character as much as he could, except for that moment when she had lifted her leg around his body and surprised him, had to agree. However, he knew that fans were not watching for choreography that worked. They were watching to see their favourite idols dancing for them. The intimacy onstage could be too much.

N thought for a moment.

"The only way is to let the boys see it and get their feedback."

"WHAT?" Both Siana and Ravi said together.

"We're not ready, we have barely finished," Ravi grumbled.

Siana paled. She couldn't do this with Leo watching, with all their unfinished business hanging over them.

"Don't worry, I will just show them the video."

"It's almost lunch time, I don't think I can shoot the video now," Siana muttered.

N smiled and reached over to the phone that Siana realised was propped up against the foot of the mirror all this time.

"It's okay, I recorded the whole rehearsal."

Ravi cringed, throwing back his head.

"Aaagh, I forgot that he always records practise for monitoring!"

Siana resisted the urge to snatch the damn phone out of Cha Hakyeon's smug little hands.

As N scrolled through it, he chatted amiably to them as they sat on the floor, watching him with desperate eyes.

"We're done for the week. Tomorrow we have arranged to go hang-gliding as you have suggested, Miss Siana."  
Siana was taken aback. They hadn't asked her to arrange anything.

"You have?"

"Yes, your cousin Panos offered to make arrangements when Hongbin told him. They're becoming close. Panos hasn't told you?"

Siana shook her head. She had spent the week flopping into bed exhausted and rising the next morning like a zombie to do some stretching and having breakfast before warming up for another rehearsal.

She had no time for Panos and his new boyfriend.

N wanted to put in almost four hours in a continuous round of repetition every day, and that required rest. She spent the afternoons having lunch with her dad, and walked to the sea for a coffee after siesta time was over. Evenings were quiet. Sometimes when she felt certain Leo was not in his room, she would strum her guitar on her balcony, a little put out that she couldn't do it freely because she had Leo living above her.

The monotony and full focus on their task had kept her brain busy, and her heart quiet.

The sudden panic with which she had reacted to the idea of, not just seeing Leo again, but having him watch her seduce Ravi with her wayward leg on his phone, told her that, even though she thought she had barely had time or energy to think about Leo, the mere thought of him was enough to send her over the edge.

Well, the circumstances are unusual, Siana, she reminded herself. That didn't calm her at all.

N tapped his phone with a flourish.

"There. Sent!" He said, proudly.

Siana could only look at him, mortified.

"Hyungie, no!" Ravi squealed, lying back onto the floor and giggling.

"Oh, Siana. Could you meet us tomorrow at 11?" N said, getting up as if the conversation was over.

"Oh. Shouldn't Panos go with you since he arranged it all for you?" she asked as calmly as she could.

The hell she was going to hang out with Leo and his band of crusty manipulative beggar boys after they had all watched repeat viewings of her hanging on to Ravi's pelvis with her hook leg.

"Panos is busy, so I am asking you."

And with that, Siana's next 24 hours had been predetermined by the mistress of fate, in the guise of Cha Hakyeon.


	6. Hearts in Danger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things heat up in more ways than one.

It was after sunset. Ravi showered and dressed and went looking for Leo.

He could see that all of the members had watched the video on their chat group, but only Leo had failed to comment. The comments were basically verbal wolf-whistling, but they had kept it fairly tame, since everybody seemed to have put two and two together about Leo's interest in Siana.

He wanted to make sure that Leo wasn't taking it the wrong way, but he was fairly certain that even if Leo said he was fine about it, he would be saying so just to put him at ease.

Ken and Hyuk were draped over the sofas watching tv through half-closed eyes, whilst Hongbin was fiddling with coffee in the kitchen. He saw him lighting a gas burner, which he thought was odd. Wasn't there a stove?

Ravi knew N was still showering in Leo's bathroom, but Leo was nowhere to be seen.

"I'm going to the studio," he said to the boys, thinking Leo would be there.

He walked down the stairs, passing Siana's door. He could hear music playing inside, so he stopped, wanting to hear what song she was playing. He could hear it was a traditional song, probably in Greek. It was a lament, slow and sad - a strong female voice - and seemed to be a live recording of a concert. He was intrigued, both by the melody and by the fact that Siana was listening to such music.

He paused to listen, leaning his shoulder on the wall beside the door, a little smile on his face.

He had grown up hearing folk songs. And although he ended up loving different music, there was something about traditional folk music, even if he didn't recognise it as from his own culture, that moved him. Perhaps it was remembering comforting times as a child surrounded by family, or perhaps it was the beautiful themes of sadness, loneliness, love, regret. Folk and traditional songs always dealt with the sorrow and joy of being human. The effect on him was almost immediate, and he could feel himself getting emotional.

He sighed, standing back upright, only to find that Leo was standing on the stairs below, watching him with distrust in his eyes.

"Hyung," Ravi said with a start.

Leo looked at him dispassionately. Even though Ravi could see Leo's face held no expression, he felt waves of displeasure coming from him. Ravi felt flustered. It looked bad to be found hanging around Siana's door like this, and here he was trying to look for Leo to make sure he was okay about that video.

Not for the first time, Ravi cursed N's love for stirring things up.

"I was looking for you."

Leo took a step up and stopped.

"And you thought you would find me here?" He gestured to Siana's door. Ravi sensed a very strange tension in Leo. He seemed to be wound tight, like he would burst at the tiniest provocation.

"I was on the way to see if you were in the studio. But then I heard the music-"

Leo began walking up the stairs, not waiting for Ravi to finish. On impulse, Ravi stepped in his way.

"Hyung, can we talk?" He put a gentle hand on Leo's arm. He could feel Leo was resistant and didn't want to hear what he had to say.

Ravi felt that the moment would pass and he would lose his opportunity to settle this matter with Leo before their day trip in the morning. He didn't want to have the day marred by bad feelings, especially since Siana would be coming along.

He also thought it would be a great opportunity for them to see Leo and Siana's interaction during a day of fun, without any pressure. Despite his misgivings about any one of them going into a relationship, Ravi was a closet romantic who liked the idea of a blossoming romance. And he certainly didn't want any misunderstandings to cloud the atmosphere, especially if he could clear the air himself.

Leo looked at Ravi, hesitating. It was all Ravi needed to see that he had a chance.

"Please?"

At that moment, they heard the music stop.

Ravi saw Leo perk up, listening for Siana's movements. They both looked at her door. She seemed to be gathering things and approaching it. They heard keys  
jingling.

Suddenly, silently, Leo backed up and hopped down the stairs with graceful balletic steps, disappearing like a ghost and leaving Ravi standing alone outside her door by the stairs.

Ravi was so taken aback by Leo's comedic exit that he froze, his eyes and mouth wide in surprise. He clamped a hand over his mouth just as Siana opened the door and saw him standing there, one hand clutching the banister and the other over his mouth.

"Oh. Hi." She said, her eyes questioning as she slung her jacket on, then turned to pull her door shut.

Ravi smiled, then said loudly, "Siana-ssi, I just came to see if you knew where Leo was." He knew Leo would be lurking, as he liked to do, and would hear their conversation.

Siana smiled back, cool as a cucumber.

"Why do you think I would know where he is?"

"That's a logical answer, since even I am looking for him. Yes, why would you know where he is? You're right." Ravi laughed unnecessarily.

Siana smiled, standing there politely. She realised she may have come off as abrupt, so she continued, "Last time I saw him he was sleeping standing up, so I assume he is resting."

"Would you help me look for him?"

Ravi saw Siana look flustered for a moment, but she recovered to answer calmly, "My father is expecting me. Maybe Mr Joon or N will know?"

"Ah, yes, I will ask them."

Siana nodded, making a move to leave.

"Where are you going?" Ravi asked, a little abruptly. Siana paused, looking up at him. He seemed on edge, his smile a little tense. She wondered why he seemed awkward. She wanted to know why he was acting weirdly.

"I'm going to see my father," she said, deliberately obtuse.

"Yes. Uhm... are you going to have dinner?"

"Yes. That will be likely."

"Oh. Where?"

Siana smiled at Ravi, almost laughing. What was it with the interrogation?

"Ravi-ssi, would you like to join us? I'm sure my dad would like to talk to you about your work. Or we could tell him about our rehearsals. He would LOVE that."

Ravi smiled back, automatically putting up his hands and shaking his head no. Siana suddenly remembered that N had sent the video to Leo and all the boys.

"So, did everyone watch the video? What did they think?" she asked, her smile still on her lips, though fading from her eyes. Ravi cleared his throat.

"That's why I am looking for Hyung."

Siana nodded. Ravi's statement seemed loaded, like he was trying to tell her he knew more about the situation than she might realise. She wanted desperately to ask if Ravi thought Leo was mad about seeing her dancing with him, but she stopped herself, also thinking that Leo probably couldn't care less.

"Why would he care?" She mumbled to herself.

Ravi was surprised to hear Siana say that aloud. He knew she didn't mean to question whether he cared about the quality of their performance, but rather, the intimacy of their moves.

Did she not know that Leo was interested in her? Had Leo not confessed his interest? Or maybe, she had made advances, and it was Leo who had rejected them?

Ravi, who had just this morning thought it was best for Leo to keep his distance, now found himself asking how Leo could say no to this lovely thing standing before him.

He suddenly realised why N was being such a stirrer. Somehow, he wanted to see them come together. And Ravi realised, he would like that too.

So, he did what N did. He stuck his finger in the pot and stirred.

"Are you really asking why Leo would care?" Ravi asked. He heard a discreet cough from downstairs. Ravi imagined Leo wanting to run up the stairs to clamp a hand over his big mouth.

"I mean, what difference would it make to him if he sees that video? N is trying to make a big deal out of nothing," Siana said.

"We watch our rehearsals all the time - but you know why N sent the clip, don't you? It would not be just another dance rehearsal to Leo," Ravi said, gently.

Siana looked away. So they all knew.

"You may think he is very cold, or even distant. But that would be a mistake on your part. Leo Hyung is the kind of guy that-"

There was a sudden clattering noise and Leo appeared at the bottom of the stairs as he climbed up with speed.

He seemed out of breath and surprised that he had come across them standing there. He sneaked an alarmed look at Siana, before turning a fearsome expression on Ravi.

"Oh, Leo Hyung, where have you been?" Ravi exclaimed a little dramatically. He found it amusing that Leo was pretending that his arrival was coincidental.

Ravi looked down at Siana, who had stepped back a little from the edge of the stairwell, her eyes still averted.

"I was just telling Siana that-"

"Ah, I was looking for you Ravi. I want to show you something in the studio."

Leo avoided looking at Siana, keeping his eyes on Ravi. Ravi could see Siana shifting uncomfortably, looking down at her feet, and this told him that she was not ready to be confronted with what he had intended to say - which was that Leo was more passionate than he seemed, and he would care very much about seeing the video.

It also told him that his concern that Leo was jealous over seeing him dance with Siana was nothing compared to whatever was happening between them now.  
Ravi realised he did not really know the full story, and that he may have taken it too far if Leo hadn't interrupted him. He realised Leo had just stopped him from making a bad mistake.

He took his cue from Leo that the conversation would end now.

However Ravi felt bad that Siana seemed to be left hanging, and furthermore being ignored by Leo so pointedly. He turned to her, to try to make some paltry amends, but she had already lifted her chin and smiled at them both, not really looking at either.

"I'll be going then, Dad's waiting. I'll see you in the morning."

And with that, she was gone.

**

Ravi followed Leo into the studio. Leo turned on some lights and took the seat by the console, waiting for Ravi to sit as well.

Although it was Leo who had asked Ravi to come to the studio with him, it was Ravi who had wanted to talk in the first place. Leo had just used the studio as an excuse in front of Siana, to get Ravi to shut up.

Leo was glad that he had jumped into action before Ravi could say anything more to Siana. He knew that Ravi didn't mean anything by it - except that, like N, he had seemed to grow a huge impulse to goad him into making a move on Siana.

But if Ravi had continued on his train of thought and had actually intimated that Leo was very, very interested in Siana, it would have been very hurtful for her to hear, especially since what Ravi didn't know was that Leo had practically turned away from her.

Leo had been regretting that singular moment for almost every hour that he had spent apart from her, unable to explain.

The week that she had given him was finally over, and all he had wanted to was to find a quiet moment to square things with her.

But instead of being able to speak to her alone, they were now all going on a buddy trip with seven other people - most of whom were going to be watching them both with hawk eyes.

Leo couldn't help but think his brothers were all a bunch of sentimental romantics rooting for happy endings.

He looked at Ravi, who appeared sheepish and unsure of what to say. Leo knew that when he hadn't commented on the clip N had sent to their chat group, that he would be sending the message that he was not pleased about it.

When he had heard his phone ping that afternoon, he had been alone on the balcony in his bedroom. He saw from the thumbnail that it was a clip of them rehearsing, and he hesitated to open and watch it.

Since that that morning a week ago when he had been rudely awakened by N to be told that Siana had burst into tears, Leo had tried his best to stay out of her way. He had agreed with N that there needed to be some distance between them, both for his and her sakes.

For him, he needed to cool off. Even though Siana thought he wasn't interested, the fact of the matter was that he was frightened by the intensity of interest that he had for her. During his time alone he wondered if he had pulled away from her out of some kind of deeply-ingrained habit to keep personal relationships from developing - or was it something more instinctive?

Was he afraid of how much he wanted to be with her?

For her - he needed her to have time to get over the sting of his rejection, so that he could explain himself to her when she was calm.

He cringed inwardly. He had acted like a fool, even though he had felt justified at the time. And even now, felt somewhat justified. He had to explain to her that it was for her own good. That he was trying to save her the heartache of their eventual separation. That it couldn't go anywhere - and that he wasn't one for a casual romance.

Even if Siana wanted that, I could not go into it casually, he thought to himself. I would free fall and crash down into loving her and I don't think I could ever get out. And it would kill me if all she wanted was some excitement for the holidays, nothing more.

There was no way they could start something. He didn't even know what she wanted to do with her life. If they started something, where could it go? They barely knew each other.

Leo knew he had to keep control over himself when he spoke to her. He had to let her down gently, tell her all those myriad thoughts of the future which had somehow struck him during their kiss, and made him feel that he was stealing something from her without her knowing. She had to know the pitfalls of being with him - and how being together was a scenario that didn't stand a chance anyway.

Now, as he watched Ravi squirm and try to find a way to start his important conversation, he could see that unless he squared things with her soon, he would be just like Ravi in her eyes.

Burdened, guilty and ashamed.

"Wonshik-ah."

Ravi looked at him with plaintive eyes, hoping that Leo would relieve him of his burden. Leo remembered that he had tried to play games with him at the potential cost of Siana's feelings just a few moments ago. He could not just let that slide.

"Are you enjoying your rehearsals?" He kept his face expressionless.

Ravi's eyes widened. He stuttered, "Well, yes, I mean, the rehearsals are going fine."

Leo could see Ravi was discomfited by his sudden line of questioning. He liked not being on the receiving end of the teasing for once. There was pleasure in being cruel, Leo realised.

"I saw the video. Looks like you were having a hard time getting it to work. At first."

Ravi looked Leo in the eye, trying to gauge where he was coming from.

"Hyung, are you mad at me?"

Leo turned those words over in his head as he returned Ravi's stare. Was he mad at him? No, not really. He was mad at the situation. He was mad that Cha Hakyeon was trying to bait him into throwing a jealous fit. He was mad that it wasn't him there with Siana's leg wrapped around his hip.

But mostly he was mad at himself, because he had a beautiful girl in his arms, and he had let her go.

Leo ducked his head, breaking the stare with Ravi. He didn't have the heart for this sort of game. The momentary pleasure he got from making Ravi uncomfortable was not worth the pain of being confronted by the nature of his own behaviour.

"No, I'm not."

He thought he would sense Ravi relax, but he seemed to remain on edge. Perhaps he had more to say. Leo wondered what Ravi must be thinking was on his mind.

"You wanted to talk to me?"

"I forgot that N Hyungie likes to record our rehearsals to monitor our progress. We were having trouble with the technical side of the choreography. With Siana's help we were able to figure it all out. I wanted to speak to you because maybe N shouldn't have sent it like that. And you didn't respond, so I thought you were upset. At me."

Leo looked up at the ceiling, feeling very ragged around the edges.

He was all kinds of mad.

But he couldn't be mad at Ravi. Ravi hadn't done anything except be there.

He was mad at Siana for feeling so at ease being up close and personal with Ravi. But he also couldn't be mad at her, because she was finding a solution to their problem. And, he told himself, she was professional.

He was too, wasn't he? After all, he believed there should be nothing between them, for their own sakes.

He was mad at the others for complimenting them on their progress. Although he was certain they were genuine, he couldn't help feeling they were laughing at him.

For the first time since agreeing with N that he should just wait it out and speak to her when his time was up, he felt completely out of control of the situation. He had no control over his privacy, how his brothers thought about him and Siana, he had no control over how she was feeling.

Although he knew they were good boys, he didn't like them talking about the video without her knowledge of what they were saying. He wondered if they would say the things they had said in making fun of N and Ravi, if she were party to their conversation.

Because in making fun of the boys, they were making fun of her too. At least, that was how Leo felt.

His mind knew better - that it was innocent fun only intended to rib N and Ravi - but his heart told him it was wrong.

So he hadn't commented, for all those reasons, because he didn't want to be the surly, sullen older brother who was too sensitive.

Turned out that he gave off that impression anyway.

Leo felt suddenly helpless, lost. He felt his throat constrict, and he had to swallow a couple of times to loosen it.

Of a sudden, his eyes welled up with tears, which he blinked away rapidly, still looking up at the ceiling.

He knew Ravi would have noticed, but Ravi sat quietly, looking at the ground.

Ravi sensed that Leo was close to breaking, and he wanted to say something, but feared pushing him over the edge, even if it was a show of care for him.  
He swivelled his chair to face the console, turning it and the computer monitor on. He fussed with the equipment as he began to talk, giving Leo some space, but also catching his attention during a vulnerable moment.

"I heard your song. It made me think how nice it would be not to have to deal with heartbreak. Then there wouldn't be sadness, there wouldn't be goodbyes. You could feel safe knowing your heart would never get hurt."

Ravi laughed, a little sadly. He opened the file that Leo had saved and played it softly through the desk speakers. Finally, he turned to look at Leo, who had recovered somewhat and was watching him calmly.

"But then just now when I was speaking to Siana, I thought, if Hyung had to go through heartbreak with someone like her, it would be worth it."

Leo looked surprised. Ravi smiled at him, shaking his head.

"I mean, how could you keep away?" Ravi asked softly.

Leo looked at Ravi, a kind of comprehension hitting him.

How could he?

**

Siana came downstairs the next morning, nerves playing catch in her belly.

When she saw Leo last night in the stairwell, he had appeared so suddenly that she didn't have time to prepare herself. She was caught off guard, and had felt so shy of him she couldn't find a place to look. She was also in the midst of processing the knowledge that probably everyone in Vixx knew something about what was going on.

He seemed unwilling to acknowledge her, and that hurt a lot more than she thought it would.

She had tossed and turned in bed as midnight had approached, and was about to doze off when she heard the shutter doors to the balcony above hers creak open. She knew it was him, taking some air outside.

She had gone still, as if he could somehow tell she was awake from where he was.

No matter what I tell myself about his shitty behaviour, I can't stop thinking about whether he thinks of me, she complained to herself.

She was a 21st Century Single Lady failure. All the sass she thought she had, all those smarts, all the brains and all the attitude and how happy she was to be independent - all melted away every time an errant thought of how he was doing came into her mind.

She fluffed a pillow and lay it across her eyes, folding it down over her face to cover her ears. She lay her arms over it to pin the pillow down. The sensation of hearing herself breathing was a little off-putting, and as she began to relax, she started to hear her pulse in her ear.

She sat up, uncomfortable.

She got her phone and checked her messages. In a week's time, Min would be in Athens. The last time she had mentioned it, Siana was all excited about Vixx being in her home.

Now she couldn't wait to get away from them for a while and spend some time Leo-free in Athens with a girlfriend. They could have manicures and spas or go shopping or just eat. She was hoping Min would be in the mood to have some fun.

She checked her social media. Her selfie post from Arachova had gotten two types of responses: people who had no idea what she meant by the hashtag #dots, and people who went ape over her being so lucky to be there.

She checked Leo's profile without thinking. He hadn't posted since before travelling. Neither had any of the others. She wondered how long they could go before they had to become active again online. Surely their fans were wondering where they were or what they were doing?

She put the phone down.

When she finally lay back, it was to thoughts of the morning's activities. She hoped they wouldn't insist on her hang-gliding too.

She had done paragliding from the same launch point before, and the euphoria of gliding down into the deep valley below and out into open land was a real high.

She didn't want to feel that and then come crashing down when she was faced with Leo at the bottom of the trip. How could she smile at him and laugh and squeal at how amazing it was, if he were just biding his time to tell her some awful news about why he couldn't bring himself to complete his kiss that night?

She would want to jump in his arms and let him feel her pounding heart beat against his. She would want to look into his smiling eyes and know he understood her and felt the same high.

She turned over onto her stomach, lying over a pillow and folding her arms around it.

Her thoughts turned to Leo over and over again. She had done so well being distracted over the past week. And now, knowing she had to see him tomorrow, she seemed to be losing any modicum of control she had over her thoughts of him.

She imagined it was his torso she was lying against, not her pillow.

She imagined he had his arm around her, and she lay in the crook of it, holding onto him and feeling the warmth of his body. She imagined she smelled his scent, and wondered if he would smell good to her even when he smelled bad.

The sudden memory of him holding her tight as she slammed into him while they played basketball reminded her that she had been in this position before. When they had finally landed, she had slid off his broad chest and into that weird bedroom embrace. She cringed and hid her face in the pillow.

How she hated and loved that memory!

When she finally fell asleep, it was to half-dreamed, half-wished for fantasies of his face as he turned to look at her, of his lips as they parted, of that small moan he gave her as they kissed.

When she awoke, she felt as if her body had been a prison that had kept her inner self from spinning out of control.

She had dressed in thick leggings, bringing along her ski overalls which she would put on at the top if it was too cold. They would be at the base of the mountain proper, and even on a clear day, it was colder than it was a hundred feet below them. The vegetation changed to become alpine, and winds could have a much lower chill factor.

On top, a slouchy fleece tunic over her zip-up thermal hoodie, and finally her puffy jacket and her snow boots. She felt suitably ski-resorty, and wanted to look her best even though she felt her worst. She knew that she looked good, even in her understated clothes, because she was fit and strong.

It was her middle finger up to Leo, knowing she looked good. She wanted him to know, You could have had this.

That petty thought was all that was keeping her sanity intact, and it gave her a lot of pleasure, even though she knew it was a meaningless attempt to salvage her pride.

When she walked out into the sunshine, she saw the glorified van idling by the kerb. Hongbin, N and Ravi were standing by the open door, whilst Hyuk and Ken had taken their seats inside, in the back row of seats. She saw that Leo had taken the passenger seat in front, which was a relief for her. She didn't have to sit near him and he would be in front of her, which gave her more space.

Hongbin saw her and smiled. She couldn't help but respond. He had been so gentle and patient with her, and she appreciated his quiet presence that night at the restaurant. He stepped forward and bowed his head politely.

"Morning," he said, making Ravi and N turn. Leo turned his head, looking at the kerb. She watched as it took him a moment to look up at her, his eyes lingering on her body. He looked like he hadn't slept either. Before his eyes reached hers, she looked back at Hongbin.

"Hi," she said, as cheerfully as she could, aware of Leo's gaze as she approached.

The boys made way for her to get in, and she took a seat by the window two seats behind the driver. They piled in after her and drew the door shut.

She folded up her ski pants and rested them in her lap.

Ken announced loudly that he was going to sleep on the way up and that they were not allowed to take beauty pictures of him while he rested.

She smiled as she looked out the window, then turned back to look at him.

"Siana knows what I am talking about, look at her, she knows," he joked, giving her an uncle-y smile as he pulled his jacket up to his chin and winked at her.  
Gosh he was cute, his eyes little curves that had smile lines fanning out from the sides. She laughed and shook her head, turning back to face the front.  
Which was when she noticed that Leo could see her in the rearview mirror. She realised that she had picked the wrong seat - he had a clear view of her and she would be stuck there for the next hour or so as they travelled up.

He averted his eyes, but she had caught him looking at her as she had shared a laugh with Ken.

Well, she hoped her having fun with Ken burned him the way she felt his eyes burning into her. She felt hyper-aware of him and wanted to throw her hoodie over her face and pretend to sleep. She wished she had sunglasses, something, anything to put between herself and Leo in the mirror.  
Hongbin, who had sat in her row of seats, leaned over to ask her if she was going to hang-glide too.

N and Ravi, who were in front of her, turned in their seats to pay attention. Thankfully, she saw Leo lean against his window and look out, taking himself out of the reflection in the mirror.

She chatted amiably with the boys til they had passed through all the olive trees and had begun their ascent towards Delphi.

She watched the trees below as they winded up the road, loving the view anew. A small smile hung on her lips, and she thought of the times she had told her dad she wished she could fly just so that she could soar over this one little valley.

She felt that she hadn't seen much of her dad in the same way she usually did when she was here. She had gone headlong into a heavy schedule with N and Ravi. He hadn't complained though, but she felt distanced from him for being so busy.

She wanted to make it up to him, but she wouldn't have that much time to do day trips with him, especially since tomorrow was the first Sunday she would begin teaching classes. Her only free day would be Saturday, and that would last a few more weeks.

The boys had gone quiet, some dozing, some looking at the scenery, in their own pensive moods.

She turned from the window and looked directly into the rearview mirror.

Leo was looking at her again, his expression softer, more wistful.

He had caught her smiling to herself, and she felt she didn't want to be petty with an attitude because her thoughts were about good things. She held his gaze for a few seconds, her own gaze softening.

She could see him react with a look that seemed strangely hopeful. She wondered what was on his mind. She wanted desperately to hear what he had to say, but it didn't seem like it was going to happen today, surrounded by all the boys. Once they had lunch and jumped off the edge of the cliff, the day was over. She would be seeing her dad in the evening for a quick dinner, and then in the morning she would be busy.

She held his gentle gaze for a moment longer, then dropped her eyes to look at her hands in her lap.

Their momentary shared connection made all her fears and doubts fall away. Something in his eyes told her he wanted to share more time with her. She could see he wanted to speak to her just as much as she wanted to. Even if the news was going to be bad, she felt ready, if only because she simply wanted to be with him again.

She rested her head back on the head rest and looked out at the changing landscape. It was getting more rocky, and the trees were barren, except for the odd pine tree and red-leaved maple.

She would try to find a moment today. She had to be with him today.

Just for a moment.

**

That morning Leo had awoken with a start, feeling as if he had missed the bus, and missed his chance to finally see Siana.

He got up and got ready quickly, needing to get things in order before they got started. He packed a day pack for himself and took on the role of making breakfast for the boys.

He could see N and Ravi were hovering, keeping an eye on him as he moved around the kitchen making eggs and instant coffee. He eyed the gas burner and little pot and vowed he would learn to make greek coffee before he left.

He felt better than he did the day before, and almost optimistic that maybe Siana would be happy to see him and speak to him. He would speak to her somehow or other today, and if he couldn't do it during their trip he would seek her out as soon as they got home.

Talking to Ravi had put some things into perspective for him. Although he hadn't definitively said so, he got the feeling that Ravi wanted him to be happy, and if that meant being with Siana despite the odds... then so be it.

When Ravi had said, "How could you stay away?" it had hit home for Leo.

It was the essence of his dilemma. It was where the opposite forces of his heart and mind found some common ground. Both would agree that he could not stay away.

Despite wanting to keep her safe from harm, despite wanting to spare her a future that wasn't carefree, that wasn't this holiday, that wasn't private and precious - he felt that he was gravitating towards her with gathering force, and that at some point, she had felt that too.

All he had to do today was to find out if she still felt the same, even when he had acted so badly towards her.

He arrived at the car to find Min Seok was warming it up. He took the front seat, wanting to give Siana choice and space when she arrived. As the boys came wandering down the stairs with Joonie, he felt the atmosphere was good, even though anticipation kept him on edge.

Siana came out a few minutes later, her appearance heralded by Hongbin. He stopped himself from looking directly at her, thinking that he might seem overzealous, instead giving her a moment to greet the others. He saw that her snow boots were calf-length and had a rim of black fur around the top of them. Her leggings were thick but he could see the definition in her muscles as she walked, and that her legs were slim but had that elastic grace that dancers and athletes had.

He felt a stab of jealousy that one of those legs had been clinging to Ravi just yesterday. What a fool I am that these are my thoughts, he thought to himself. A fool to be envious of Ravi, a fool to have let her go, a fool to allow her to make me wait for so long.

He should have fixed everything as soon as he could.

If he had had his head about him back then, maybe he would have. But his mind overcame him with doubts and anticipation of bad things happening that had not even happened. But of course, things that were clear to him now, seemed a distant possibility then. Now, he wanted to fix things as soon as he could.

He looked up to find he had missed her gaze, and she had already turned to enter the car.

As they drove off, he realised he had a clear view of her in the rearview mirror, and he sneaked a look at her as she laughed at Ken. When she caught him at it, he knew he made her uncomfortable, so he tried to keep himself out of the sightline.

It was only later when all the cheer and excitement had died down, that he ventured another peek at her, to find her looking out of the window with a wistful smile. Whatever she was thinking, it was both sad and happy and made her beautiful.

He wished she would look at him, and when she did, it was as if she had answered his wish, as if she were seeking out his gaze. In that moment he knew that she was ready to hear whatever he had to say, and it made his heart race.

In Arachova they got out to swap drivers, stretching their legs briefly. Leo watched ahead as Joonie drove carefully up the now narrow road. Siana now sat right behind Joon so that she could guide him.

They had taken the final stretch of road which went straight up to the launch point. They were now at the highest vantage point with the view of the sea before the road would turn inland towards the mountain. The noonday sun was bright and illuminated the valley of dark green olive trees below under a misty haze that hung above them, giving the air a glinting quality.

Siana leaned forward, pointing out an area that had been covered with gravel.

"This is the launch point. But we will have lunch first. We have to hurry, because afternoon winds could be high. We need to start before 2pm. Just follow the bend and we'll stop at the first shop."

As they approached the gravelled area, Leo saw the road turned sharply to the right around a corner of the mountain face. As they followed the bend, everyone gasped in awe.

From being on the edge of a cliff, they were suddenly travelling on flatland, a plateau that was grey with stone but covered with a thin layer of soil and pure green grass.

The plateau stretched for about two or three kilometres, and when their eye travelled to the end, they saw that they hadn't even begun to approach the full height of the mountain. A forest of pines covered the base of the granite that rose out of the plateau like a monolith, and the fine mist that was in the air thickened into a fog further up.

In the plateau, were chalet resorts and sparse housing, and along the main road were dotted eateries and ski supply retailers.

Siana signalled to Joon to park at the first eatery they saw. As they clambered out, they could smell the meat on the grill already. Siana smiled.

"Panos made sure they would be ready for us," she said. Suddenly she waved at the little blonde lady that came out the front door and skipped over to give her a hug.

Leo heard her speak in Greek, her voice lilting with the gentle rise and fall of their chatter.

The boys watched her go in, happy to see a familiar face.

"Does she know everybody in this strange land?" Hyuk asked, staring dreamily out into the distance.

The boys chuckled as they followed in after her.

**

Siana was kept busy answering questions from N, Hyuk and Hongbin, who had cornered her at the table and wanted to find out more about her life. She answered demurely, aware that everyone else was listening, although quiet. She relaxed a little when she found the three of them responding with stories and observations about their own lives. Much as she had thought, they were like most human beings with dreams and passions of their own. Being with them in such proximity hit it home about their normalcy. They were just boys, just men, just dreaming, just working.

She observed that she hardly felt any of those fangirly feelings she had felt when she only knew them from a distance. At a distance, they seemed unreal, godly. Up close, they were guys, just like her cousins, and they were both familiar and unfamiliar to her as Vixx at the same time.

Familiar because they looked the same, and had the same expressions and behaviour as she had seen in videos.

Unfamiliar because they were still strangers that she was getting to know, and they had moods, and they were showing sides of themselves she hadn't seen before, not being close to them.

She could see that Leo was listening intently, though focused on his eating with Ravi and Ken. Every now and then they would make a comment to each other but she couldn't hear them. He seemed to turn over her words in his mind, sometimes nodding, or looking at her. It seemed as if the three boys talking to her voiced his thoughts for him, so he didn't need to ask or say anything.

She wondered if that was a product of them working so closely together. She knew that in a group dynamic, some people became louder or quieter, more dominant or more reserved, and that when the group changed numbers, their behaviour changed accordingly too. Perhaps he was just quiet because it was him listening to her story, and they had had a shared past that was a game-changer for them? Or maybe he always listened quietly, ruminating, going over the details in his mind?

She liked that, because it signalled a single-mindedness that she wished she possessed. She felt that she often let her feelings decide her actions for her, and it was only that she happened to have very grounded sort of feelings that were rooted in reality and pragmatism, that she didn't end up acting like an idiot.  
People tended to think she was level-headed, but she felt that it was more the fact that she felt for other people, that stopped her from being inconsiderately wanton about her actions. She had certainly had her share of awful moments where she had spoken without thinking, or hadn't listened properly to someone. The effects of her actions on others taught her to be more aware of them, because she couldn't stand hurting people, especially from being tactless or thoughtless.

Siana realised she was trying to give him character traits she couldn't confirm he possessed, just by watching him listening and eating at the same time.

Maybe he has a listening problem and processes dialogue slowly, Siana thought humorously.

Well, that made him adorable too, so she surmised that she needn't bother analysing, since her feeling was that anything he did was lovely.

She smiled as she chatted with N and Hyuk, feeling a warmth rise up inside. It was like a well of hormones and heated blood had combined to fill up the imaginary loveheart-space in her body that went from her belly to the top of her chest.

Lunch was brief, and the boys soon came out of the restaurant to take in the view outside, warm takeaway coffees in their hands.

Siana said her goodbyes to the owner and came outside to join them. They still had an hour before the operator would arrive to set up their equipment. That would take time, so they would have slightly more time even than that.

"What are we going to do for an hour?" Hyuk asked. He hung an arm around Leo's neck and leaned on him. She had to look at Leo when she looked at Hyuk.  
She pointed to a copse of trees that stood on a hill that rose out of the plateau, on the way up to the mountain.

"There's a cave up there, wanna go see?" She was answering Hyuk, but was waiting for Leo's response. He turned to look in the direction she was pointing.

"What would we do there?" asked N.

"Look inside. Turn back," Siana said. It was true, there wasn't much else to do there. Leo looked back at her, amused. Ken who was behind them, laughed.

"Anything inside?" Asked Hongbin.

"Yes, there is a stalactite and stalagmite formation. Pagans used to worship Pan up there because they thought it resembled him," Siana explained.

"Who was Pan?" Asked Ravi.

"The god of nature. And uhm, sexuality," Siana answered. She saw N and Ravi perk up.

"Let's go!" They said at the same time, starting toward the car. Hongbin and Hyuk laughed, following after them. As Hyuk left, he brushed past Leo, who let him go on ahead.

He stood before Siana, who was still smiling. He took a few steps towards her, watching her face for a reaction. Her smile softened as she realised he was coming closer and she gazed into his eyes as he moved.

He still had a small smile lingering on his lips, but it was the look in his eyes that caught her unawares. It was a strange mixture of gentleness coupled with the eagle-eyed gaze of a man on the hunt.

She broke the gaze for a moment by looking down at her feet, completely overcome by the intensity of that look. It was only for a moment, because she wanted to face him - it wasn't like she was frightened by it. She found it very compelling, and she was sure if she didn't break the stare she would react inappropriately - like reach out to him and pull him close.

But before she could look up she heard Ken yell, "Let's go Hyung!" and come up from behind Leo to take him by the shoulders and steer him towards the car. Leo looked at her one more moment before he was forced to turn away.

They insisted she sat in front so that she could show MIn Seok the way.

The continued on the road as if to go up to the mountain, but took a left just before the turn to the right that would take them up. The road was gravel and went into a sudden incline and before they knew it, it had narrowed to just wide enough for one car to pass. Every few hundred metres there was some extra space that allowed any oncoming car to slide past safely.

Min Seok, who was driving up, felt like he was teetering along the edge of the road.

They got to the end of the drive, and the road opened up just enough to allow a car to do a five-point turn and go back. Min Seok turned the car very, very carefully, so that it faced the direction they came from. Then they got out to have a look.

The air was fresh and bracing. They were parked very close to the opening of the cave, which stood gaping at them like a surprised child's mouth.

Siana lead the way to the entrance, which was wide and had a shallow floor covered in fine dusty earth, that dipped towards the back of the cave. She waited for everyone to join her, letting her eyes adjust to the darkness. Before long she could see the lone stalactite and stalagmite formation which had formed in the centre of what looked like a hallway. In the middle of that formation where the icy calcified columns met to form a large and wide trunk of ice, was what looked like a carved sculpture, the head of Pan.

"This is it," she said, cheerily. She knew it wasn't much, but it felt relatively awesome to know that a long time ago, people used this place to worship. She could only guess at the Bacchanalian shenanigans that might have occurred here too.

The boys trundled in, some whispering and some trying to get their phones to light up the darkness.

She watched Min Seok and Joon lead the way round to the back to view the formation from there, with Ravi, Ken and Hyuk following. N and Hongbin lingered by the wayside, looking at the walls, which were seeping water and glistening in the flashes of light from their phones.

Leo hung back, standing next to her.

She felt incredibly aware of his presence, and imagined his aura was tangible, radiating outward from his body like a buffer of warmth. She felt that if she took a step closer, she would be enveloped in it and would never be able to set herself free.

What a funny way to think of someone's proximity, she thought.

He suddenly turned towards her, making her turn to look up at him. The expression in his eyes was urgent, as if he didn't have much time left and had to say something before it was too late.

"Can we talk now? Can we go outside?" He searched her expression, looking as if he was holding his breath. She looked at the others, who were busy taking pictures and playing. They're playing, she thought, distracted.

He took her hand. "Please."

She nodded.

"We're going for a walk," Leo said loudly, turning to pull her out of the cave without waiting to hear a reply.

Her heart was beating fast as she walked out into the sun, Leo's hand gently tugging at hers to make sure she wouldn't let go. He kept walking, turning to go up the slight incline which took them across the face of the hill, and became more and more steep as they went. It curved around to the side, which took them out of view of the mouth of the cave.

After a few minutes, they reached an outcrop of rocks from which a gnarled pine tree curled and kinked its way toward the sun. They walked out until they were a few feet from the edge. They could see the road as it approached the cave, enclosed on one side by the rockface, and on the other by pine trees. Beyond that, below them, spread the wide plateau that was dotted with cabins.

There, he dropped her hand and turned to look at her. They were both out of breath from climbing the footpath, but also breathless from anticipation.

He put his hand on his hip as he looked down at her.

Her cheeks were rosy from the walk, and her mouth a cherry red, open and dewy. Her brown eyes were looking away as she tried to control her breathing.

She was so close, had been so close to being his. This time he was not going to screw up. He would lay it all out bare for her, make sure she understood that he had made a mistake, made sure that she knew what could possibly be in store for her, then ask her for a second chance.

His only worry was that after she heard what he had to say she would say no.

No. It seemed so final.

He didn't think he could take no as an answer. He didn't know what he would do if that was what she said. Would he beg her to reconsider? At that moment, he felt he could just go straight to begging, if it could only guarantee her acquiescence.

When she finally looked up at him, his breath caught in his throat. This was the girl who had covered her face with her hands and wailed when he had teased her about giving her backstage passes to their concert. This was the girl who had singlehandedly fended off her attacker while he stood watching helplessly, too late to help. The girl who had melted into his kiss so softly. The one whose eyes he had seen go from warm and inviting, to surprised, then hurt, then cold, in a heartbeat.

Now he saw that same warmth in her eyes, but this time she was holding back something. She wanted to hear him say what he had to say, but he felt like she had already decided something, and was just letting him say his piece before she delivered bad news.

Maybe he was just imagining it, but he knew that it was now, or never, and he had to go forward with his intentions.

"I... I wanted to tell you that... I..." he paused, frustrated. He had gone over in his head the words that he had wanted to say, the many different ways he could have expressed himself, but all thoughts seemed to have abandoned him. He couldn't process his feelings into sentences that would clarify and express them to her in a way that would capture her attention and keep her listening.

He could kick himself. He felt he was letting this block thwart his intentions, and he felt powerless to push through or to overcome it.

He took a breath, encouraged by her patience as she waited for him to find the words.

Now or never, Taekwoon. Don't let her down a second time.

"I acted badly that night. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that to you. I didn't want to," he started, but stopped when he saw her face fall.

"What is it?" he asked, alarmed.

Siana laughed bitterly, stepping back a little and holding back tears.

"Of all the things I was expecting you to say, I didn't expect to hear that," she said. "I mean, if this was all you had to say to me, it was clear from that night that you wish you hadn't kissed me. You didn't have to wait this long just to tell me that. It was obvious."

He grabbed her hand, panicked.

"That's not what I meant. I don't regret kissing you. I regret how I treated you after."

Siana blinked, watching him closely. He shook his head, knowing he couldn't stop now.

"I wish I had not spoiled it like I did. I missed that kiss. I missed you." Tentatively, he brought his hand up to her cheek and caressed it with the back of his fingers, then when he saw she didn't object, opened his hand to cup her cheek.

It was warm against his chilled fingers, and he felt her shiver at his touch. Her breath quickened as she looked back up at him through the tears brimming in her eyes.

"If I could do it all over again I would," he said urgently, willing her to trust him and believe his words. It seemed so right to be so close, and it seemed an even better idea to put his other arm around her and draw her in closer, but he had to bide his time, to make sure that he didn't make any wrong moves or say the wrong thing again.

"So, why...?" She murmured, staring into his eyes and leaning her cheek into his palm. She seemed on the verge of letting her emotions take control. Her eyes were wide, soft and plaintive, full of hope yet full of pain.

He brushed his thumb across her cheek in a last gesture before he took his hand away, looking down at his feet. He stuck his hands in his pockets as he spoke.

"There are some things you should know about me. About my life. Being in a relationship with me... it would be very hard on anyone. It would be hard on you. That's what I thought of. When I kissed you. I felt like I was leading you on, because I knew it couldn't go anywhere, not unless you want pain in your life. So, I did what I did. I was trying to save you the heartache, but I messed it all up so badly and I hurt you. I'm sorry."

He looked at her, a little red in the face, but his eyes were wide as he waited and hoped that she would understand where he was coming from. He could see she was thinking through what he had to say, and was trying to decide whether he was genuine or not.

"You must be aware of how the media can be. How our fans can be?" He waited for her to nod as she cast her eyes down. He saw a tear finally fall as she bent her head. It felt as if he were watching her esteem for him fall away. He felt disappointment in her very posture, as if she couldn't bear to look at him from sheer regret for his actions. He felt it, even though she had not said anything, because it was the last thing he wanted her to feel about him.

He wanted her to like him, to adore him, and to never feel like he had disappointed her.

Realising this made him aware of the depth of his desire to please her - and thus the depth of his desire to be with her. He kept talking, desperate to keep her listening, to keep any possibility of her accepting his excuses alive.

"Not all of them. But we have an obligation to be a certain way, to please people a certain way. You may know of times when misunderstandings made things very difficult for friends of mine. For colleagues of mine. Innocent people who got caught in the firing line, who got attacked. They got threats from people who claimed to love me. And, even if there was some hope of being accepted," he was reluctant to say, 'as mine', "there are things people feel they can do to me, or ways they feel they can treat me, that can cross the line for a woman in a relationship with me."

"Like what?" Siana interjected.

He didn't want to answer her, didn't want to tell her about the love letters, the personal gifts, some mildly erotic and others downright pornographic, the money fans spent lavishing presents and parties and possessions on him and the others in the group, some officially and others trying through unofficial channels. There were rules against fan gifts but it didn't stop the gifts from arriving. The company had to go through the items, even though all of it didn't reach the boys. There was no viable way of making sure there was nothing dangerous about them. Rejecting them could draw verbal violence, threats of self-harm or threats against him or the others. Women with power played their power games, trying to elicit promises to meet privately, trying to get higher ups to make sure it happened. Others with less selfish intentions still weren't quite right in the mind, and it seemed churlish to try to curb their behaviour, so they simply hoped that behaviour didn't escalate or turn harmful.

He had always thought of himself as the youngest brother in a family of females, relatively innocent to the ways of the world, and it irked him to be forced to think of himself as a sexual object the way some of the women out there did. Of course they would argue that that was his persona on the stage - but a stage persona is a construct, a fabrication that succeeded with lots of makeup, costumes, moves, expressions, lighting and of course, the music. It was not real life, where skin was flawed, faces were tired, there was no glamorous soundtrack to the tedium of daily life, and dancing couldn't heal the pain you caused someone.  
With the others in the group, they would joke about it, slightly embarrassed that they obviously held some attraction to women and girls of all kinds and ages, but sometimes perturbed by the feeling that they had no control over their own privacy.

And if he were to start seeing someone, he would be opening her world to that part of his life, which he felt would simply sour the romance of their relationship.

"Your silence tells me a lot," she said, sadly. She looked out into the valley beyond.

He reached for her hand.

"You don't think I could handle that?" she asked softly, turning back.

"No, I think you could handle it," he said, looking down at her hand in his. "I just don't want to put you through it."

He didn't have anything else to say about his world. But he had more to say about what he wanted from her. He wanted it to be clear to her that, despite his misgivings about it, he couldn't see himself walking away from being with her right now.

And all he wanted was the moment right now. With her, to last forever.

He felt her hand pull on his, and he looked up in surprise as she pulled him just enough to make him take a step closer. His heart beat faster as he realised that now, she was looking at him as if he was the target she wasn't going to miss.

"You don't even know me," she said quietly, looking at his mouth. He thought he saw her eyes go heavy for a moment, but then they looked back into his eyes, a crinkle at each corner as she laughed a little.

"It's not like we're getting married," she smiled up at him, holding both his hands close to her sides as they came even closer to each other.

When he didn't laugh at her joke, she went serious. He was staring at her lips, and his own had parted as his breath quickened.

She pulled her hands and his, round to the small of her back, so that his arms folded around her sides, and they were embracing with their fingers intertwined behind her. He had to lean down, and she felt his breath on her lips as he paused, looking her in her eyes for a moment longer, before letting his lips seek hers out.

She opened her mouth and took him in, surprising herself with the force of her desire. She could tell he was unprepared for the voracity of her kiss - though he certainly wasn't unhappy about it - yet he responded in kind, letting himself slake his thirst for her as she did her own for him.

She let go of his fingers, bringing her hands forward to his waist. She put them tentatively on his stomach, and was pleased to find his belly was taut, though flexing with his deep breaths. She put one hand around his waist and let it rest in the crook of his back, while the other slid up the flat planes of his torso, up, past his sternum until she snaked her palm around his neck and cupped the back of his head.

He groaned, sinking into her kiss deeper, turning his head more and letting his arms envelop her fully. His hands were resting in the small of her back, and he wanted to let them fall lower, but instead he brought them up higher, bending his elbows so that his hands came up to her upper back.He could feel the strap of her bra under his fingers, and he pressed his hands against her there so that she arched up towards him.

Her hand on his neck sent shivers down his spine as she let the pads of her fingertips stroke his skin there. An errant finger traced the outline of his ear, and he couldn't help himself, he sighed into her mouth, overcome by the erotic sensation.

She was like manna from heaven and he was a poor sinner needing redemption.

He broke away from her kiss, panting. Her eyes were closed, her lips plump and open and her breathing heavy.

He gave her one last kiss, pulling on her lower lip as he finished. He leaned his forehead on hers, trying to catch his breath.  
Her hand continued to play on his neck, while his dropped down from her back to rest on her waist. He ached to stroke her skin under her clothes, but he kept them still, waiting.

Their breaths mingled as they stood still, forehead to forehead. A sense of calm descended upon them, and he felt her arms come together at his neck as she reached up to hug him, tight.

He liked how her face rested in the crook of his neck, and she seemed to be breathing in the scent of his skin just under his jawline. He found it highly erotic and felt his breath quickening again. She relaxed her embrace a little, resting her head against his chest and bringing her arms down around his waist.

"Will you kiss me like that every day until you go?" she murmured, her voice thick and husky.

That brought him back down to the ground, hard. He didn't want to think of how short-lived their time together would be.

"Do you want it to end when I go?" he asked, his own voice quiet.

She pulled back to look up at him, perplexed. What else did he expect, since he was leaving at the end of his trip?

"When you go, that will be it. You go back to work, you tour, and then we think about each other til we stop thinking about each other."

He dropped an unexpected, chaste kiss on her talking lips. She inhaled sharply, the desire in her eyes rekindling again.

"That sounds horrible," he whispered.

"Are you trying to shut me up?" she mumbled, eyeing his lips which were swollen from working hard.

"Yes. I don't like the sound of your nonsense," he said with a smile, dropping another close-lipped kiss on her mouth as he looked straight into her eyes.

He was delighted to find that even his pecks were enough to make her catch her breath and close her eyes. She pushed on his chest with both hands to keep him from doing it again.

"You think I didn't know what this was going to be? When you asked me to go outside that night, I already knew how far I was willing to go with you, even though I knew you would be leaving soon. I know where I stand. I know what I want."

Hearing that turned him on even more. He kept getting surprised by Siana in ways he didn't expect. He pressed the length of his body against hers, trapping her hands between them so that they rested on his chest.

"Your interest in me is on a timer," he said, looking down at her with an amorous frown, half wishing he could kiss the resistance out of her, and half wishing she would kiss him and tell him she was joking.

She held his stare, bringing her chin up defiantly. She didn't like how accusatory that sounded.

"But we are on a timer. Once you go home, we will likely never see each other again," she stated simply.

"Why? Why must it be that way?" he asked.

"Well, unless you're going to commute to my home every time we miss each other, or unless I suddenly find a goldmine in my kitchen to buy myself tickets to Seoul on my days off, what kind of a relationship would we have? Long distance commitments? No, thanks. I'm just being realistic here."

"I will buy you all the tickets you need to some see me," he said, grandiosely.

Siana frowned. "I couldn't let you do that," she said.

"Why not?"

"Hold on, soldier, just a minute," She pushed against his chest again, making him release her, and stepped back to look at him with amusement on her face. He was acting like they were committed for life.

She smiled a crooked smile at him as he looked at her earnestly. How handsome he looked when he was looking at her earnestly.

Was he for real? It sounded like flights of fantasy were circling around and drawing love hearts in his head, but when she looked at him, she saw that he genuinely believed that their finite time together did not spell the end of whatever they were starting. Much as she would love to believe in the possibility that they could be together long-term, she had already accepted in her heart that once he left Greece, that would be it. And she had been coming to terms with being happy with the small amount of time they would have had together.

"Can't we just see where it takes us? Go with the flow?"

He gave her such a look of disdain for the idea that she giggled.

"Oh I see. You don't drive unless you have navigation. You're one of THOSE," she laughed.

He smiled, his upturned eyes changing from intense to boyish in an instant. He pursed his cupid's bow lips and for a moment she imagined he was blowing her a kiss.

"That's how I got where I am," he said, "I decide on what I want, I weigh all the outcomes and then I make sure every step I take leads me to that goal."

She liked hearing that. It was a little frightening too, because it meant that any failure was something he had to admit responsibility to. It also felt like if she were that goal he was talking about, she would feel like she was being hunted by a particularly single-minded animal.

Although she wasn't one to sit around waiting for things to happen, she had always found that things worked out in her favour when she set her mind on them. But she had never really set goals for herself in that deliberate sort of way. She wished or wanted for something, and she kept it in her mind all the time, and she grabbed opportunities and she learned and she did. It was more of an organic process that followed what life brought to her. She supposed that having what she wanted uppermost in her mind meant that she was open to the possibilities that surrounded her, and was able to take opportunities that she might have ignored if she were not so aware.

In that sense, she felt that she tended more to go with the flow. She saw herself as someone who received good opportunities and remembered to be grateful for them.

She now realised how important it had been for him NOT to have kissed her in the first place, not to get involved. He believed that getting involved meant commitment, something that would place a heavier burden on her than he thought it would on him.

His offer to pay her way to come visit him seemed at once irresponsible and flippant, and deep and serious at the same time. It made her uncomfortable. At first she thought it was because she didn't like the idea of a man paying for her to come visit him. It put a financial quality on the whole idea which she found off-putting. She also believed that if things turned sour, his generosity would be a burden on her and turn into a bad memory for him.

She could see that the struggle that he had had in the past week was much deeper than hers had been.

He had felt he had lost control of himself and gone headlong into a powerful kiss that he believed he should never have indulged himself in - because of the very reason she believed the relationship would be short-lived: he was leaving. They barely knew each other and he couldn't expect her to drop everything to be with him.

But now she saw that he wanted exactly that. She suspected he had done a lot of thinking about the logistics of them being together after his departure, and it both enchanted her that he wanted to go deep into it with her - and alarmed her that he seemed to be making plans that didn't involve what she believed in or wanted.

She looked at his child's smile, all upturned eyes and eyebrows, so different from the glaring ferocity he sometimes had on stage. She saw silliness and lightheartedness, something he seemed to hide.

Or maybe she had seen this side of him but ignored it because the domineering stage presence had her all caught up.

And under that wide toothy smile, she could see he was a little breathless, a little desperate for her to say yes.

It made her feel desired, needed.

It also made her sad that she couldn't give him the answer that he wanted so badly. But while she was a carefree spirit, she cared too much for the feelings of others to dismiss his deep feelings in order to protect her own.

"Can we just go into this without thinking of how we will come out on the other side?" She said gently, her hands moving up the front of his jacket to hold his collar. His smile slowly disappeared, and she could see he was preparing himself for something he didn't want to hear.

"You just asked me if I thought you couldn't handle a life with me," he said, a little sullenly. "At first I wanted to tell you that nothing could happen between us, for all those reasons I said. But I can't. I want you. I want to be with you."

Although those words made her breath catch, she couldn't help but think he was speaking too soon. He barely knew her.

"How do you know that for sure? Shouldn't we spend some time together to see if it works out?"

"We've kissed - you know there is something more than physical attraction between us," he said, his tone full of an unexpected, animal urgency that caught her by surprise. She felt, rather than understood, that he was right. It was true.

"Unless you don't feel what I feel. Unless what you feel is just physical," he said, morosely.

Siana was torn. She felt a deep pull towards him, but at the same time felt pressured by him, by those last words. He seemed to be making plans in his head which didn't have space for her own.

"Hey, don't do that," she said, touching her finger tip to his pouting lips briefly.

He looked at her, perplexed. She shook her head.

"That's not fair on me, saying things like that. I was ready to take a chance before you were. You're doing some heavy thinking here that doesn't seem to involve me at all."

He immediately looked rueful.

"Yes. I tend to do that. But what I am trying to tell you is that I want us to be together. And I am uncomfortable with the idea of this being something... temporary. It feels like you want me to just fit in some fun while I am here."

Siana was glad she had pointed out her side of the story, because then she had gotten this admission from him which made everything clear to her about where he was coming from.

While she wanted it to remain open-ended with the possibility that they would likely never see each other after the holidays, he thought that doing as she wished was a way for her to keep her distance, not to commit.

But commitment was what he wanted.

Leo from Vixx, I thought I had a crush on you, but now I find I am falling a little in love, she thought.

"What about we promise to make plans just before you go, and not earlier - and be okay if one or the other of us has changed our mind?" she said, trying to reach a compromise.

He pursed his lips again, not entirely happy, but considering what she had to say.

Her hands were still on his collar, so she pulled on it a little and reached up to plant a closed-lipped kiss on them, just like he had earlier.

"Don't do that, you're teasing me," he said, sulking.

"You did it to me, and I learnt it well from you," she said, smiling back cheerily.

She heard someone calling from the cave.

She pulled him down again, this time kissing him deeply as they looked into each other's eyes for a moment. She kissed him long and slow, taking her time and leaning into him.

When she pulled back, he still looked sullen, but also a little in pain from the delicious agony of tasting her mouth.

"If you're mad at me, I will take this kiss as an advance for tomorrow. So you know, you don't have to kiss me tomorrow if you don't want to."

He opened his mouth to say something, but she planted another peck on it and let him go, turning to yell to the others, "We're here!"

She turned to look at him with a mischievous expression. He was smiling, but he had a dangerous expression on his face, the kind someone has when they are about to return a dirty trick with one of their own.

He reached out to grab her hand, but she was quicker and sidestepped him, twisting away and leaping suddenly back towards the path. He gave chase, but had been caught off balance, so she managed to get away up the slope opposite before she realised she was caught too high up to get away. She would have to go back down towards him to make it safely back to the car.

He could see that she was trapped, and a devilish look came into his eyes. He stopped, standing languidly in her way and opened his arms.  
"It's okay, I forgive you," he said magnanimously, laughing at his own haughtiness. She gasped indignantly, putting her arms on her hips as she stood above him.

She saw his eyes drop to look admiringly at her legs in all their spandex glory. From where he was, he must have had a great view, she thought wryly.

She rolled her eyes at him when he finally looked back up at her, but his eyes held that hunger that she was coming to like seeing.

"What? They're mine now," he growled.

She felt her gut twist with an unexpected flush of heat.

Before she could react, Ken and Hongbin came up the footpath and found them standing in their strange formation, Siana with arms akimbo standing high up on the hillface, with Leo on the footpath staring at her with predatory tension.

"You guys ready to go?" Hongbin asked, giving Ken a sideways glance.

"Yup!" squeaked Siana, who hopped down just in front of Leo and quickly walked their way. She brushed past Ken and Hongbin and scampered along the path till she found the car and all the others, waiting.

Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit,

Siana. Things are getting real and all your high-falluting ideals about relationships don't seem to make any more sense.

She just knew that she was keenly aware of Leo, and that she was entering an orbit with him which seemed to be spinning her out of control.  
All because of his words. He might as well have said, "You're mine now."

All these thought and feelings, and all the emotions and physical sensations that he had given her with his touch and with his kisses, were roiling around inside her as she rather breathlessly approached the car and took her seat in the front.

She could sense all the boys inside it were trying very hard to remain aloof and look as if they weren't dying to find out the latest development in their favourite drama.

She saw Leo follow behind Hongbin and Ken as they came to the car, and he still had that expression on his face that looked like a mixture of anger and desire.

We're all about to go jump off a cliff, she thought, stupidly.

She felt as if she had already jumped, and that she was still falling. And she loved every moment of the glorious, exciting, stomach-churning fall.

**

Leo felt like he was burning up inside - and that if he stared hard enough at something, he would burn a hole in it with his eyes.

Siana had all but said yes. She had kind of, sort of, Not Said No.

That is, if he only processed the words that came out of that sweet and naughty mouth of hers.

But her body told him differently: it told him she wanted him just as badly as he wanted her. Her body that had pulled him close just as she was trying to talk him into slowing down. Her eyes which had stared into his as their lips touched, her nose as she scented him in their embrace, her hand as it had drawn a line enticingly up his torso, but had avoided really touching him the way he wanted - she was all contradictions, all push and pull, and he couldn't help but be drawn into it.

Go with the flow.

The weirdest, least romantic words he thought he had ever heard.

He wanted to hear her ask him for his kisses again, wanted to hear her say his name, wanted her to call him hers. But instead he had heard plenty about when he was leaving, why they should wait and promises to be alright with it going nowhere.

He felt at once disappointed and highly charged by her flirtatious manner.

Perhaps she didn't realise what she was doing, but her skittishness and reluctance to let him take the lead was seductive. He thought he would be leading her in this dance, but found that she was leading him - and he liked it much more than he thought he would.

He was beginning to understand on a gut level, some of the lyrics he had been singing for years without a second thought. About how pain and pleasure could almost be the same thing when it came to matters of love.

He stopped himself for a moment. Love? Was this love?

He watched her as she hurried away down the pathway and out of his sight for a moment, leaving Hongbin and Ken watching him out of the corners of their eyes as they slowly turned to follow her.

He wasn't exactly sure when it was during their conversation that he started having bad thoughts about her, but he suspected it was about the time he told her he didn't like how she seemed to expect him to just fit in some fun together while he was here. She was saying things that were making him mad, making him doubt that she had received the sincerity of his confession, but at the same time, was pulling on his collar, teasing him, letting him go.

The thought had crossed his mind that she was being insolent, even though he understood that she was just holding her ground, and trying to do so without offending him or making him feel small.

Maybe it's my hormones talking, because they're all wide awake and raring to go, he thought.

Her long, lithe, leggings-clad legs that were at eye-level just a few moments ago, came to mind. He had felt like just looking was not enough, and had imagined thoughts about those legs that he could only describe as bad.

And when he had seen her roll her eyes at him, something inside of him, that particular quality of his character that made him gentle, courteous and polite, had snapped.

She had just had her hands all over him, had been telling him things he didn't want to hear, or at least, had not been saying the things he DID want to hear, and she had had the gall to roll her eyes at him when his own eyes had strayed to those lovely legs - which were clearly on display for his benefit.

He thought, angrily, they had better have been on display for his benefit only, and not for the lascivious eyes of other men.

Then he had growled at her to his own surprise. He had never really spoken to anyone like that before, and didn't consider himself a person who declared his possessiveness like that. He felt that kind of behaviour was uncouth. Rough.

That is not what I am like, he thought. He hadn't expected that of himself, and for a moment, had felt remorse at his harsh tone.

But her reaction was unexpected, too. He had seen a flash of desire burn in her eyes, and she had gasped a little before hearing Hongbin call out.

That look of lust was gone in an instant, and she had got out of there so fast. He could only think that she was frightened by what he had said. Or maybe, she had been frightened by what she felt - perhaps from inexperience, or perhaps from not wanting to fall further for him than she had wanted to.

That last thought made him smile with devilish glee. If it were true that she was falling harder for him than she wanted to, then he had a chance.

Despite your own reluctance to commit to me, you will fall so hard, I will make sure of it, he thought to himself.

He suddenly realised that he was thinking of her as an opponent, and in this game they were playing, he wanted badly to win.

**

The flight set up team had already arrived and had laid out all their equipment on the flat ground atop the cliff they were to jump off. They had prepared tandem harnesses for both hang gliding and paragliding flights as they had been warned that the boys did not have enough experience, if any, to do solo flights.

Siana recognised a couple of guys and girls that she had come to know as acquaintances during the last few years that she had been working with her father. She knew they worked as freelancers and also were tied to the ski resort and local extreme sports groups, so she knew they were in good hands. She greeted them in Greek, and had to do some explaining about the group she was with. Both the guys and the girls couldn't help but notice that the boys were rather polished-looking to just be a random group of travelling friends seeking adventure.

"Who's the doll?" Asked one of the girls, making a stab of jealousy pierce Siana's heart. Did she mean Leo? Siana followed her line of sight and realised she was eyeing Ravi.

"Yeah, who's the doll?" chimed in one of the boys, winking at Siana.

She calmed herself. If there was something she wasn't prepared for, it was her surprisingly strong reaction against the idea that someone else could be interested in Leo. She wondered why she was thinking so foolishly. Firstly, he was a pop idol. Secondly, she had always looked down on possessiveness as a sign of weakness and immaturity. Thirdly, she believed fans had no true claim on their idols anyway, so what right had she?

My right is that I have staked a claim on him. And him on me, she thought to herself, feeling a delicious warmth envelop her body from knowing that that was the truth. She could still feel the force of his claim on her lips, and she wondered if he was as hyper-aware of it as she was.

And at this moment she thought she could see that possessiveness could be viewed as something meaningful, rather than immature or weak.

All this time I thought I knew it all, but really, I knew nothing, she thought whimsically.

But the jealous feeling was very strong and took her by surprise. She believed it was irrational, in any case. If she were jealous of anyone being interested in him, that would mean she would be jealous of almost everyone he came across. She stopped herself from sneaking a peek at him.  
I'll be jealous and bitter, then, she thought, thinking rather uncharitably, that he better be jealous and bitter too.

Then Siana stopped herself.

Didn't she just tell him to keep himself open to the possibility that they wouldn't last too long? Wasn't she the one who had basically poured cold water over his ardor just a few moments before this? Siana realised that despite her confidence in herself, she may have been thoughtless. She felt a tendril of remorse creep into her heart and wrap itself around it. She had felt that she had a claim on him, and yet she had more or less told him that whatever was happening between them was temporary.

He had done something very brave by confessing to her and telling her he wanted something more than just a holiday romance - and she had basically pooh-poohed it because she had figured in her mind there was no hope for them beyond the time they had together now. She had shut down his desire for them to make it work.

How he must feel right now.

She may have made him feel very small, as if what he felt didn't matter much to her.

She felt careless, like an inconsiderate tease, and her high spirits threatened to seep out of her like sand through her fingers. She had already decided that it was too much to expect that they would continue forward beyond the time they had together now, but if he had been willing to see it through, how could she have not recognised that that in itself was a big deal from someone in his position?

She felt someone step close to her and looked up to see that Leo was looking at her in concern.

"Are you alright?" he asked her gently, unperturbed by the looks that the flight team were giving them both. He took her hand in his, holding it down by his side. All his attention was on her, and she realised, he had noticed whatever miniscule change in expression she had made and had come to make sure she was okay.  
Siana felt as if something inside her cracked, and a molten surge of heat flowed out through that crack, melting her heart and making her feel loved. She looked up at him gratefully, smiling a little. She saw him react with a deep breath, as if he could see that he had made the right move checking in on her, and that he was happy being rewarded with her gratitude. It pleased her that her acknowledgement of him caused that reaction in him. And she knew that his concern for her had brought that out of her naturally.

She got a little inkling of what caring for someone else in this way felt like.

It was what he was asking for, and what he was giving her despite her protests. She had so thoughtlessly dismissed it - and she was sorry.  
She nodded, feeling more than a little emotional. She could see him searching her face, wondering why she was suddenly choked up.  
She smiled, saying, "Yes, I am okay. Thank you."

She heard the girl and guy whisper loudly to each other rather theatrically, "Oh, that one is taken. Hands off that one, do you hear?"

Siana laughed and turned to them, still holding his hand. "Would you like an introduction?"

"Yes," the girl said, squaring her shoulders as the male instructor also smiled naughtily. Siana giggled, and made a general introduction between the team and the boys. There were some team members she didn't know so they introduced themselves when she came to them. The boys took their cue from that and began introducing themselves too.

Siana said a silent prayer that they wouldn't do a group Vixx greeting, knowing that her Greek acquaintances could find it a little confrontative and alarming - and she could see Ken and Hyuk had noticed her expression and figured immediately what was on her mind. They nudged each other and looked at her, catching her eye, pretending like they were getting into formation for an official shouty greeting.

Siana gave them a dirty look, but she knew they were joking, after all they were supposedly keeping a low profile. When the lead instructor asked who would be going first in Greek, she pointed them out and nodded conspirationally to the instructors, who came forward and pulled them to the centre, presenting them to the leader like sacrificial chickens.

The others started moving aside and giving the team space to dress them in a harness each. One of the girls Siana knew chose Ken to fly tandem with, and he immediately turned on the charm, all twinkling eyes and giggling toothsome smiles. She could see the girl responding in kind, and wondered if she had been the same when he had lavished his attentions on her.

She surmised that she had, because that kind of personal adulation was very enchanting. A girl couldn't help but be flattered, even if he was coming on too strong. She realised that she might even have given all the boys the impression that she was interested in Ken just as her friend was giving that impression right now.

She caught Leo's eye and he smiled at her knowingly.

She smiled back shyly.

The air was fairly still although she could feel a slight breeze. If they delayed any longer the wind could lift and become too strong for a safe flight, although she knew that the instructors were all very experienced.

The boys had prepared their phones to capture their own and each others' flights, and Kkomae and Min Seok handed out a couple of tiny industry-grade cameras for recording as well.

She watched as both Kkomae and Min Seok reminded Hyuk and Ken of elements of the recording that they should aim for, and thought that, even in moments that were supposed to be about pure enjoyment or spontaneity, they had to think of the technical requirements of their job. She felt it was a little burdensome, but then again, she knew that as a fan, those were the things she was looking for: the best lighting, the best angle, their happiest and most energetic expressions. She felt both sad for them and a little guilty that she wanted them to capture the best quality for the sake of her viewing later.

It feels like an unhealthy relationship, she thought to herself, but one that we are both willing parties to.

Still, Ken and Hyuk didn't look at all put out by the work they were expected to do recording their journey through the sky. In fact, they looked excited and happy to be going first.

Ken and his lady instructor went first, and as he sailed out over the edge in his paragliding harness, he sang a full-bodied operatic note into the chasm below, causing most of the boys to erupt with laughter.

His instructor turned around, bit her lip and clutched her heart as she pretended to swoon, which caused even more hilarity from the boys and instructors they had left behind.

As she and Ken travelled further, that beautiful husky note turned into a blood-curdling scream as she pulled on the sail to give them more lift. The boys just laughed harder.

She noticed that Leo was barely laughing, but had come to stand close behind her, keeping her hand clasped in his tightly. She felt the warmth of his body at her back, and the feeling of being protected made her feel small and precious for the first time in a long time. The last time she had felt like this was when she had been small enough to be carried by her father when she was too tired to carry herself on her feet.

Hyuk was up next, and as he was prepped by his instructor on how to run and then slip his feet backwards into the little cocoon-like harness on his hang glider, another instructor gestured to Ravi and N to come up and get prepared next.

That left Hongbin and Leo, who came to crowd around them with her and watch as Ravi and N listened intently to their instructors. Ravi, whom she had thought of as very street wise, seemed unusually subdued and listened with eyes downcast as his lady instructor strapped the tandem harness to them both and adjusted the buckles at his shoulders, groin and back. Because she was guiding from behind, she was basically spooning him in an upright position. He looked a little abashed, but maybe also a little thrilled.

N looked him up and down, rather enviously. He was holding the other pro camera on a short-handled stick, which he turned to interview him with.

"Ravi, say something for the camera," he prompted.

Ravi smiled a shy smile for N's benefit.

"I think the preparation is as much fun as the flight itself," he said into N's camera.

N gave Ravi a dirty look.

"Oh, is it because of all the buckles and straps, or because there's a woman in control of you?" N said drily. Ravi might have blushed, Siana was not sure.

Hongbin stepped in front of him and smiled to camera, holding up his clenched fist.

"Vixx Fighting!"

Then he pushed past N, turning the camera on him instead.

"Is Leader Hyung going paragliding or hang gliding today?"

N touched up his hair in the camera viewfinder.

"Hang gliding. Because it feels more like flying."

"Not because it's easier on your bones? Because of your age? You know, gentler? Less strenuous? Because of your liver condition? Or was it your weak muscles?"  
N made stanky faces at Hongbin as he continued to prattle on.

Siana could see that it was such a part of their lifestyle to be playing off each other for the sake of the camera. There was artifice in everything they did, but they were at the same time genuinely themselves.

It was a strange duality that she was beginning to understand only on a gut level. If someone asked her to explain she wouldn't be able to do it.

She looked up at Leo again, who was watching them with his customary poker face. He looked back at her, his eyes widening a little in questioning.  
He really did look like a kitten - if kittens had bee-stung lips and milky skin. There was an innocent quality in his eyes when he looked at her like that, and she suddenly felt very protective of him.

Did he really enjoy the life he had? Was this something he could call his life's purpose? Or was he just working, just trying to get somewhere with the means that he had?

He suddenly smiled, those eyes crinkling at the edges.

"I think hang gliding sounds better though," he whispered down to her.

She chuckled, loving seeing the laugh lines his smile made.

"Like superman?"

"Yeah, like superman. Hongbin thinks it's cooler to sail down sitting in someone's lap." Leo thought that was exceedingly funny and giggled into the back of his hand.

"Aww don't make fun of Hongbin, he's got standards," she whispered back, making Leo laugh out loud. She was looking over at Hongbin and N's terse interaction as N got attached to his equipment by a rather burly instructor. She had never seen N as scrawny or malnourished, but he suddenly looked it next to the bigger guy. N looked up at the guy rather comically, while Hongbin captured that on camera for him.

They turned to watch Ravi just as he floated off the edge, cradled in his seat by the lady instructor. They could hear his low guffaws of excitement as he sailed out of view for a moment, then surged up higher before they began their descent.

Hongbin turned the camera back to N after Ravi had gone a little distance, signing off and handing the camera back to N. Then, as if he hadn't been trying to humiliate N for the last few minutes, he leaned in to give him a hug and wished him a great jump.

Siana could see that to a certain extent, they took what was a natural part of their character and used it for the benefit of the camera. It was natural, and if ever forced, was on purpose or for effect. They had become comfortable with the nature of their lifestyle - which was putting their personal lives out there, without putting too much of themselves out there at all.

She could see there was a form of self-censoring or self-management that never seemed to go away.

She wondered if they ever really relaxed or felt like themselves when they were at work.

It came to mind that this would have an effect on their family and friends as well, who might never get used to it. She supposed this was why they seemed to keep family life so separate.

If this was the life Leo wanted to offer her, would she be okay with being kept separate from it too?

This was what had scared him - and what he wanted her to understand she would be letting herself in for if they were to be together.

She knew there was only so much he could do to protect her from it if she didn't like it. In the end, the adjustment would have to be made by her.

She became aware that he was stroking the back of her hand with his thumb as he held it. It was a simple gesture that sent thrills up her spine. Without thinking, she leaned back against him, and he brought his other arm up round her shoulder, bringing it forward and across her upper chest to hug her tight, putting her into a gentle headlock in the crook of his elbow.

She giggled, falling back into him, and he bent his head down to nestle his cheek against the back of her neck.

If adjustments were to be made in order to have this, Siana felt that she could do it.

It would be worth it.

**

Leo had sensed that something was on Siana's mind, and he had taken his opportunity as soon as he saw her face become sombre all of a sudden.

Now, as he held her tight and nuzzled his face against her neck, he felt the elation of having scored a fantastic goal, the result of a process of maneouvres which together with insight and timing, had lead him to success.

Who am I kidding? I did what my heart told me instead of stopping myself with my own thoughts and doubts, he thought to himself.

He could see what N had been nagging him about all this time. He made a promise to himself to listen to his first instinct first before letting his thoughts take over.

Recognising what he truly wanted was probably the hardest part of the process, and he had never struggled this hard with his own doubts. He supposed when it came to matters of the heart, there was no denying what the heart wanted, and his willingness to trust his instincts had served him well in the end.  
He could sense the earlier jittery vibes Siana had were dissipating, and she was becoming relaxed.

She reminded him of a young foal, skittish, energetic, always knowing what she wanted, but maybe not quite sure how to go about getting it. He could see she was not someone to just follow, and that he had miscalculated his approach towards her somehow, which had made her hesitate to accept him fully.

He would be mistaken to think that she would be grateful to be his just because of who he was - and this was a sobering thought for him - for he could not use his celebrity status to his advantage. It had only provided her foreknowledge of him before they ever met. He could see she was analysing their behaviour, and may have been a little bewildered or put off by what she saw.

Although they hadn't spoken since their moment outside the cave, he could feel that there was something different, a softness, an acquiescence, that he didn't get from her before.

Perhaps she had decided that he was right, and that she wanted to see how far they could go. Perhaps she had simply felt sorry about how things had went - not that he was expecting her to be. But there was something different, and he wanted to hear what it was from her lips, not to make any presumptions about her thoughts and feelings as he had done earlier.

He was prepared now to wait a little longer till they had a more private moment together to really talk things through.

Despite the exciting prospect of his upcoming fight across the valley below, he couldn't wait for it to be over so that he could spend time with her.

Siana shifted slightly, taking her weight off him. He looked up to find that N was ready for take-off and that Hongbin was already strapped in with his instructor, awaiting his turn.

Siana let go of his hand as another instructor came forward to prepare Leo for the hang glider. She stepped back, admiring his lean form as he slipped into his harness and listened and watched with a blank expression on his face. She knew he was listening because he would nod cursorily every once in a while.

She found it funny that a person who made a living based on his expressions and singing and dancing, could be completely unaware of his own disinterested expressions in real life.

Min Seok and Kkomae, who were alternately capturing video of the others as they sailed away and of the ones still on land getting prepped, were now hovering around Hongbin and Leo.

Hongbin did a series of dimply expressions and peace signs for Min Seok's camera, while Kkomae just filmed Leo being instructed on what to do. As Hongbin ran off the cliff with his instructor, Min Seok walked slowly back towards them, preparing his camera to give to Leo to take down with him.

"Leo-ssi, have you done this before?"

"No," Leo answered without looking at the camera.

"Any thoughts before you go off the edge?"

"No."

Kkomae sighed and turned with the camera to get a view of the valley below. Before he could complete his step, Leo put his hand out and stopped the camera from moving, then turned Joon the other way to look at the view.

KKomae was momentarily perplexed, but then realised why Leo had stopped him from turning that way. Leo did not want any footage of Siana, who would have been standing in the view as Joonie turned that way, to be caught on their official footage.

He looked at Leo, who was staring at him with a serious expression. Leo held his gaze for a moment longer, waiting for an acknowledgement of some sort. Kkomae nodded curtly, realising that he would have to be more careful than even Leo was, if he was to protect the privacy not only of the boys, but of Siana as well. It was something Leo was nonverbally asking him to do now.

Kkomae had noticed the affections Leo had been showing Siana, and despite his misgivings as a company executive, he was happy to see it. The life of a pop idol could be tedious and heartless, and he was happy that despite his own brutal schedule, he had a life outside of his work that allowed him some personal comfort with family and friends. He couldn't say the same of the members, who had added pressures to keep romance out of their lives.

However, he did not see how this could be anything more than a fling. After all, they would be leaving soon, and it had only been a week since they had met. It was an opportunity for that and nothing more, as Kkomae saw it. He only hoped that Leo and Siana were cognizant of that fact and did not let it become something more than that - or at least were mature enough to understand that they should be careful. Just thinking of the company's reaction made him feel a little dizzy.

Speaking of which, there were two more flights set up and Joonie was not willing to take a running leap out into the abyss even for the sake of raw footage for the company. Besides, he would be needed to drive the van back down.

Leo was ready for his turn, and Joon saw him take one last look at Siana, before realising that she was not being prepped to jump.

"Kkomae, are you and Min Seok jumping?"

Min Seok paled, almost dropping the camera he was holding out to Leo.

"Me?" he whispered, "No, I have to drive the car down."

"I am driving it down, you go ahead," said Kkomae - as if doing Min Seok a favour.

Leo looked from one to the other, then looked at Siana.

"Let Siana take your place, but what about the other flight?" Leo said.

Siana stepped forward when she heard her name.

"I can ask them not to charge you for the unused equipment. Some of them would probably like to do a solo jump anyway."

Kkomae nodded and Min Seok breathed an audible sigh of relief.

"Would you like to jump, Siana-ssi?"

Leo looked at Siana, hoping she would. She in turn looked at Kkomae.

"I cannot pay for the flight-" she began.

Kkomae started to say that he would be paying for it anyway, but Leo butted in, saying, "I can pay for it."

Both Kkomae and Siana looked at Leo with a frown on their faces.

"-right now, but I will do so later if that's okay," Siana continued, still looking pointedly at Leo.

Meanwhile Kkomae waved at Leo, as if telling him to mind his own business, almost talking over Siana himself, saying, "It is within our budget and we would have wasted two jumps instead of one if you didn't end up jumping, so please feel free to do so as our guest."

Leo watched Siana's eyes turn to Kkomae, kinder and more appreciative than her own glare at him had been.

"Thank you Mr Kkomae, I appreciate it." She said with a smile.

Leo was taken aback as both Kkomae and Siana tut-tutted and turned away from him as his instructor lead him forward.

"Siana-ssi," he said, over his shoulder as he walked forward.

"Yes, Leo-ssi?" she turned to look at him with a smile in her eyes.

"I'll see you soon." He stated simply, his eyes steady on hers as he waited for her answer.

"Yes. Soon," she said.

He turned at the command of his instructor, followed the pace he set down the hill and walked into the air as if he was following his heart to soar over the plains.

**

Siana had noticed Leo's interaction with Kkomae and realised immediately what it was about.

She felt like the princess in the midst of some kind of security operation that had to be protected at all costs - and she wasn't sure if she liked it that much. On the one hand, she felt wonderfully cared for and precious, but on the other, she felt as if a virtual shadow had fallen over her existence.

Was she going to have to be watched over, or have to watch her own actions, from now on? It felt stifling.

The feeling she used to feel when she first began living in Kuala Lumpur - that claustrophobic, restricted feeling - came up for her as she was being strapped into her parasailing harness with the final instructor, someone she knew who travelled in the same circles as some of her clubbing friends.  
She nodded as he fed her instructions, even though they had both been through these flights before.

Her mind was on the gesture that Leo had made, putting his arm out to stop the camera from catching her. It seemed so protective and so presumptive at the same time, and despite her misgivings about what it meant for her freedom, his action made her ache to put her arms around him.

Watching him soar over the valley for a moment, she had felt an indescribable yearning to be right by his side, even though they had just been together just a few moments before.

He had flown away without looking back, making her feel a little silly waiting for him to do so.

Then she thought, why expect him to do that when she wanted him to enjoy every moment of his flight?

I just want it, she thought to herself, perplexed by her own petulant response. This is so not me, wanting something just because I want it.

"Don't worry, you'll be reunited in less time than you think. Meantime enjoy the jump, koukla," said her instructor, calling her a doll.

She smiled a little wanly. She didn't feel in the mood to respond.

She just wanted to be with Leo.

At last they were ready to go, and he shouted out final orders to the others left behind, one of whom would be doing a solo jump using the prepared but unwanted equipment. Siana had already spoken to the lead instructor who had agreed to waive the hire fees for the final jump. She was grateful to Kkomae for insisting that she jump, because she realised that if she drove down she wouldn't see Leo for over an hour, maybe more if the boys didn't want to wait at the landing spot and wanted to move on to someplace warmer.

Now, she was standing a few metres away from the edge and was about to do a run-up to meet the air, and for the first time, was thinking less about the jump and more about the landing.

It was unusual for her to be impatient with something as exciting as this, and not caring for the rush that she would expect to feel.  
She felt she was on a continuous high - and Leo was her addiction.

The instructor counted down and they began a slow trot towards the edge - and she could already feel the sail lift their weight before they reached the end of their runway, carrying them up into the air and over the chasm below.

Unlike the other instructors, hers was quiet, which she appreciated: their jump was not so much about the adrenaline rush, but about soaring high above for a few moments, enjoying their bird's eye view of the olive groves and small ancient towns below.

She looked below to see a herd of mountain goats running across an open area along the face of the mountain, which dipped down into the olive groves. She could hear the bells around their necks clanging in the distance, and their bleating. Other than that, she could hear the wind rushing through the parasail's lines above her head.

She could see down in the valley, the bright colours of Leo's glider as it approached the ground for landing. She saw it tip slightly as it came to a halt, and she looked over to the horizon to try to gauge how fast she was descending. The journey seemed interminably slow, and whilst she loved the feeling of being in the air and soaring like a bird, she wanted to land sooner, find Leo sooner.

Below her the leaves of the olive trees swayed and shimmered in the breeze, showing first the tops and then the undersides of their leaves, which were a different colour. On top, they were sage green, dark, foresty and murky. But on the bottom, they were a silvery, almost bluish grey green, and when they shifted in the breeze, it was like running a hand against the nap of a suede cloth: glinting and dark going one way and matt and bright going the other.

Her instructor readied her for landing, and she felt her heart beat faster as she anticipated that she would be seeing Leo again. they were landing a way away from where she could see the now empty glider standing. The others on the ground had gathered around together near an old bus that was waiting for the final jumpers to land, and she could see them generally milling around, some waving and whooping, some taking selfies. She waved back, but they were going to land out of sight of the group near a copse of trees. She couldn't discern which was Leo as she was fast approaching the ground and was facing away from them - and had to concentrate in order to find her footing in case they had to run to keep their balance.

But her instructor handled their landing very well, giving them an extra lift before touchdown so that they would land, plop, on their feet.

She thanked him and exchanged a quick hug before she quickly unstrapped herself and undid the harness. She pulled off her safety helmet and handed it to him as she looked around towards the group. She saw the instructor begin packing up the sail out of the corner of her eye.

She couldn't make out where Leo was, and her initial anticipation was dampened by that. She could still feel her heartbeat going strong from the jump and from looking out for him, but now she felt a little anxious.

Finally free of the harness, she turned and walked towards the group, through the copse of trees.

Then she heard his voice.

"Siana-ssi."

She turned to her right, to find that he was walking towards her all this time, approaching from behind. She stopped to face him, and he stopped too.

She couldn't contain her excitement, and she smiled a breathless smile.

"I didn't see you," she uttered, feeling silly.

"I wanted to wait for you," he answered.

She could feel herself breathing heavily, and smiled, feeling a little abashed over her excitement.

"Was it good?" She asked, wanting to know if he felt even a little of the excitement that she did. She searched his visage for clues, but he seemed closed, serious. He stepped forward, his eyes boring into hers.

He cupped her face with both hands, tilted her head up, and gave her a long, slow, deep kiss. She felt herself heat up under his touch, and she put her arms around his neck to hold him close. For a moment, it felt as if they could continue melting into each other forever.

But then they heard calling from the group.

She broke away to take a breath, leaning back to look at him with a smile.

"So it was good?"

He only nodded, leaning his head against hers and closing his eyes.

"You changed your mind," he stated simply.

She was surprised. So, this had been on his mind all this while, since that moment they had shared on the cliff, when she had finally realised what a big gesture it was that he had made towards her - and with how little regard she had responded. He may have wanted to say this then, but couldn't because they were surrounded by people.

He opened his eyes, looking at her as if with bated breath.

She nodded, watching his expression turn ever so slowly into relief and then pleasure. It was as if he had finally gotten the answer that he had prayed for, and she marvelled at how good the feeling was to make him feel good.

They heard more calling from the group, and could hear her instructor heft the equipment up and start walking. They could not hide in the little private gathering of trees for much longer without rousing suspicion.

Leo sighed and leaned his forehead once more on hers.

"I want to be alone with you. The next few hours are going to be... difficult for me," he whispered near her ear.

Siana felt a ripple of electricity sweep through her. She was at once excited to hear him say that, and alarmed that it was all going so fast. He was talking about the pain of not being alone with her over the next few hours - but didn't he mean the next few weeks?

She suddenly realised that this was a real relationship and he might have expectations of where it was going to go that she hadn't really given thought to aside from her fantasies and reliving each and every kiss he had given her.

Was she ready for what was to come? How fast did she want to go?

She felt her body pulsing with attraction for him, and thought to herself, she was ready for whatever was coming, but that she was going to set the pace.  
She looked up at him innocently, her eyes wide and dewy, and asked, "Why?"

His eyes fluttered momentarily as he looked at her in surprise. As he was searching for an answer, she gave him an open-mouthed kiss, then stopped to look at him as if she had simply done that to pass the time while she waited for him to say something.

She was delighted to see that the effect on him was stunning. He seemed unable to focus, his eyes glued to her lips as his mouth gaped.  
She bit her lip momentarily, and saw his eyelids go heavy as he watched her.

"Oh, because we will be with everyone else for the next few hours," she said. "We won't be alone." He nodded dumbly.

"I won't be able to do this," she said, stroking her hand up his neck and running her fingers up through the hair on the back of his head, fisting it in her hand and pulling on it for a moment. He sighed, his eyes closing.

Siana had never felt so in control of another person before. It was tantalising, and more than a little scary.

She heard more calls, this time a little urgent, and she realised that he would need a little more time to pull himself together than she would.

Also, if they were to make things a little more comfortable for the others, they should appear out of the woods separately - or so she told herself.

She disengaged, gently putting her hands against Leo and pushing him back a little. His eyes opened and he looked at her almost forlornly.

"But you are a gentleman. Even if I haven't been a lady," she smiled mischievously up at his pained eyes, bringing up one of his hands to kiss. He gently pulled his hand away and pushed her away by the cheek, making her giggle.

"Sorry," she said, slowly edging away towards the others.

"I'll see you out there when you're ready," she ventured, not daring to linger any longer, and turning on her heel to trot happily out into the open.

**

Leo walked out of the cover of the trees and fell in line with the instructor who was carrying the packed up parachute sail towards the parked bus by the edge of the field where the group were gathered.

It was late afternoon and the sun was warm.

He offered to help carry the equipment, but the older instructor waved him off, passing him the helmets to carry. As he handed them over, he gave Leo a look that he could only describe as knowing, but he said nothing. They fell in, walking in time and in silence.

As they approached the group, Leo could see Siana was standing with Hongbin and Hyuk, who were gesturing to each other about their flights. While she smiled and nodded excitedly, he noticed her become aware of him and look over as he approached.

He was glad to see she looked demure in front of everyone else after her brazen behaviour when they were alone.

He set his mouth in a grim line and shook his head at her, making her smile impishly. When he saw Hongbin notice their glances, he turned his glare on Hongbin too, who raised his eyebrows in surprise. Hyuk leaned in and looked over Hongbin's shoulder, giving Leo his own runway-ready glare as they watched him coming forward. Leo had to smile, but he covered it and looked away as he and the instructor swerved to stack their equipment in the belly of the bus.

The bus had been prepared to collect the instructors and the gear, but they had enough space to give their party a ride to the nearest town, Chrysso, which was tiny and ancient and had barely a coffee shop for them to sit in. They would be doubling back up the mountain but the instructors were heading that way anyway on their return to Arachova. On its outskirts, right on the highway leading back to Itea, there was a well-maintained set of sports courts for general use of the community, and they could be dropped off there where Kkomae and Min Seok would see them on their way down.

Leo followed N's lead of going around and thanking the instructors for their care, and let his brothers file into the bus along with the others. He saw Siana go in with Hongbin, and realised she was going to sit with him on the bus.

He supposed it was for the best, because he wasn't sure that he and Siana would behave themselves if they were seated together.

He got on, taking one last look at her as she sat down and glanced at him with a shy smile.

Why was she smiling shyly? She wasn't shy, he thought as he sat down at the very front of the bus.

He wondered briefly how much experience she had in relationships. He sensed an innocence about her but there were moments when she threw him off balance with her surprisingly forward behaviour. He heard her begin a conversation in Greek with one of the instructors, and could hear shades of her child's voice he heard in the recording he had found in her father's studio as she spoke. The language was different from his, but the intonations and the vocal gestures seemed so similar. It was like listening to a familiar song he didn't know the lyrics of.

His thoughts turned back to Siana's experience in love. He never thought he would care about the past of the person he fell in love with, but he felt absurdly sore about the possibility that she may have had a serious relationship - which he wished didn't matter as it was none of his business. He didn't want to share anything about her, not even with someone who was now out of her life.

He couldn't understand his sudden irritation with the notion. It wasn't as if he himself had no experience - how could he expect her to have none?  
It was a sense of possession over someone that he had never really felt before. He wasn't sure how he came to have it, because it just hit him out of the blue, and had nothing to do with how well he knew Siana. It had come to him almost from the moment he had spied her on the basketball courts on his way to Itea, before they had even met.

He felt as if everything that lead up to the moment that they met was leading him towards her: coming to Greece, staying at her father's home, seeing her before meeting her. It seemed as if the universe was introducing the idea of Siana to him before they were to meet - from him catching a glimpse of her hair as she hugged Panos on the courts, to him spying on her in her dance studio, to him finally seeing her eyes as she looked up at him unknowingly while he hid in the shadows of his balcony.

Unbeknownst to her, she had been a matter of intense interest to him. His attraction to her was primal, though more than physical.

He gazed out the window as they swerved gently up around a sharp corner.

He noticed that he had referred to himself as someone in love, and could feel the truth about that old cliche of love at first sight.  
It's not as if I can say I know Siana well at all. If this is love, it technically falls under the category of love at first sight. For me at least, he thought, feeling a heat rising in his cheeks.

He suddenly felt vulnerable. He could say that about himself with some certainty, but even with Siana finally acquiescing to him, he couldn't expect that she would feel that same certainty about him. He had no idea whether she believed in that. Maybe she believed love was something that grew out of a close friendship, or out of a physical relationship.

She's right. I don't know her at all, he thought, surprising himself by how brightly he viewed that realisation. It was a challenge for him - something he understood how to approach. It meant he had things to do, actions to take.

He would start by spending as much time as he could with her - which he realised wouldn't be that much if she was to rehearse with the boys during the week and teach during the weekends. He wondered what kind of things she would prefer to do on dates, whether she liked gifts or not.  
He didn't know anything, really. He supposed she was sporty, active, strong, and a little sentimental. She had a great sense of humour and was passionate.  
He shifted in his seat, thinking suddenly of her pulling him towards her outside the cave of Pan. Yes, passion was something Siana felt comfortable with - and he wanted to get to know the depths of her passions well.

He looked up as N came forward to sit with him in the front, clapping a hand on his knee as he sat down.

"Hello, Taekwoon," he said, looking at him with appraising eyes.

Leo looked at him, unable to stop himself from smiling. N's grin was wider than he had ever seen.

N poked him in the ribs gently with his elbow.

"Are you happy?"

Leo ducked his head, unused to his emotions being so laid out in the open, with all his feelings out there for people to see. Even with N, whom he considered one of his closest friends. He had always kept his feelings so close to his heart.

"There's no use being shy about this kind of thing. You can't hide it when it's written all over your dumb goofy face. Oh, yes, also because Public Displays of Affection on top of the mountain," N said, shaking his head.

Leo nodded, still smiling. N was right, keeping his feelings unexposed was a habit of his that was no longer relevant to his situation. Knowing that seemed immensely freeing. He didn't have any reasons for pretense.

"Does everyone know?" Leo asked, meaning if everyone understood that he and Siana were an item.

"Yes, everyone. Now all that are left are your parents and Siana's parents." N said sharply, looking at Leo out of the corner of his eye.

Leo nodded, still smiling. It made him happy to be thinking about those future prospects. N relaxed, visibly relieved to see Leo wasn't fazed by his words. He wanted to test further.

"And the rest of the world," N added, a little ruefully. At that, he could see Leo sober up a little. Leo slouched, leaning against N a little.

"I will deal with that when it comes. But I wonder if our members are all okay about it? Things could change a little. I don't know," Leo murmured, looking out at the passing trees. N relaxed, enjoying their camaraderie.

"Even if there are adjustments to be made, we've dealt with worse than a member finding happiness for himself," N said, patting Leo's arm amiably. "I am here for you, we all are. Even Kkomae is happy about it, and he's such a sour bugger sometimes."

Leo smiled, almost to himself. Having his circumstances acknowledged in this way was freeing for him, and also a little burdening. He didn't know what to do with what he saw as enormous generosity, both from N's words, and his promise that the boys were all there to support him. He felt cherished and selfish at the same time - but happy.

They heard Siana's conversation with the instructor end, and the guy yelled at the bus driver some instructions. N turned back to see what was up, and Hongbin explained that they would ride all the way back to Arachova to meet up with Kkomae there, since there were cafes and restaurants and it was still early.  
Leo nodded to himself. Any more time spent with Siana was good time. They could take a walk, talk, see things, and he would find out more about what she liked and disliked, and he would begin to learn what it was that had made him fall for her.

He would find out what made her tick, and in the process find out what made him tick too.

**

The bus stopped to let the boys and Siana off at a tiny carpark on the outskirts of Arachova, just before the turn to go back up the mountain to the flight club's headquarters. They saw the mini bus parked there, and Siana presumed that Min Seok and Kkomae were already camped by a warm fire indoors at a cafe or restaurant somewhere - probably with free wifi. She figured it would be one of the several cafes in the main square that was situated between where they were, and the other end of the main street where she had taken her selfie when she first arrived.

Gosh, that seemed so long ago.

After they waved off the bus, Siana gestured for them to walk straight until they came to the square in question. At this end of the town were ski supply shops, army surplus and tourist shops and the odd sundry shop. Eventually those shops would give way to fashion boutiques and artisan shops, including providors who sold locally made cheeses, meats and sweets. She loved those shops, and wanted to look into their windows and say hello to some of the familiar faces behind the counters.

Hongbin lead the way with N and Hyuk, whilst Ken and Ravi brought up the rear. The pedestrian kerb was barely wide enough for a single person, so they all trooped up the road on the street itself, moving out of the way every time a car beeped them as it approached.

Siana walked alongside Leo in companionable silence, listening to the boys' chatter as they moved uphill. They reached a large store that had local foods on display, and she looked into the window to see if the owner was there - an old school mate of her father's whom she felt she should greet out of courtesy. The others slowed down, watching as she peered into the shop.

She chatted briefly to the girl who was looking after the shop and asked her to pass on her regards. When she turned to continue walking, she found Ken and Ravi watching her with Leo.

"She really does know everyone," Ken said to Ravi, who nodded.

"We're all either related or related to each others' friends here," she joked, walking onto the road and passing them.

"Did you go to school here? Is that why you speak the language?"

Siana knew what they were interested in finding out - why she knew Greek better than Korean.

"When we lived here I went to school for a while. It was only for a year or so, but I picked up the language. I was old enough to remember it after... After my parents divorced. That's when we moved back to Malaysia," she said.

"You and your mother?" Ken asked.

"Yes. Even though we were all together here, she felt very alone. You know, foreign country, different language."

She didn't need to say, "absent husband" - they seemed to nod in understanding ahead of her meaning. Although she was conversing with Ken, she felt as if she were talking directly to Leo. She could see him taking in the information as if it were very important for him to know.

"And before that we lived in Sabah. Although there is a Korean community there, my mum spoke to her family mostly in their language, which is Kadazan, and to me in English. So I can understand, and I can converse a little, but my vocabulary is limited, as you know."

"After Sabah you came here because of your dad's work?" Ravi asked.

"Yes, he became very busy, very in demand. It was good for a while, but..." Siana let her sentence die. They knew what she meant.

"He knows one of our producers, Eric," Ravi mentioned.

"Yes, he mentioned that. He also said the kpop industry can be harsh," she said, laughing. "Do you think that's true?"

Ken and Ravi looked at each other, and then at Leo, all of them smiling, although a little ruefully.

"It gives us our livelihood, and we cannot complain. Life is good." Ravi said, simply.

Siana nodded, smiling back. She knew what that meant.

She felt vindicated as a fan that the boys were so likeable, so real. She wondered how being friends with them in day to day life would be like. She could see that she would get along with almost all of them.

Her mind skipped ahead of herself for a few moments. She imagined living in Seoul, managing a successful dance studio and interacting with the boys on a regular basis. She would chat with Hongbin and appreciate his quiet, dry humour. She would invite N out to go watch musicals and then they would analyse them after. She would play basketball with Ken and practise English with Hyuk. She would tease Ravi about his modelling engagements but accept his free tickets to fashion shows.

When it came to Leo, she stopped herself. She was imagining what it was like to live a fantastical life in a place she had never thought of living in, out of the blue. And imagining doing so with Leo seemed to be a very big step that she didn't want to take. It would set her up to want it, and she didn't think it could be a reality.

Even if it were suddenly possible for her to uproot, leave her work and her life and friends behind, to go live in the metropolis that was pretty much the stuff of fantasy, she didn't think she would do it because she would have to leave her mother alone. Besides, much as she agreed now that they should try to play for keeps - it could still fail. She could decide after a few weeks that she didn't really like him anymore - and he could change his mind about her too.

She felt that all her thoughts, positive and negative, seemed to give her pause.

Anyway, what was she doing imagining such outlandish things? Inviting N to go watch musicals, teasing Ravi about his modelling engagements? She cringed inwardly. She could not imagine herself telling any of them these thoughts, and she felt silly for thinking them so suddenly, in the middle of their conversation.  
They came to the square, which opened out from the main road into a wide, paved area that was lit by the dwindling afternoon sun. The cafes had set up their own chairs, umbrellas and outdoor heaters and there were some people already seated, turning their faces towards the heaters or the sun setting.

Ravi and Ken trotted ahead to sit with N, Hyuk and Hongbin, who had already found a heater and were pulling together tables enough for them all. Siana paused to look in a boutique window, still thinking to herself about her fantasies of life with celebrities in Seoul.

Her eyes fell on a mannequin which had been dressed in a mini dress trimmed with faux fur. Whilst she didn't think much of the outfit, the act of window-shopping made her think of walking around the city with Leo, looking into shops and chatting. If that were to happen, would they be left alone, or would they be mobbed? She supposed that celebrities knew where to go, did that sort of thing all the time, where people more or less would leave them alone.

"You like the dress?" She heard Leo's quiet voice by her side. Her eyes suddenly saw his reflection in the window as he stood by her side. Funnily, it looked as if his head were atop the mannequin for a moment, and she turned to him with laughter in her eyes.

"Not really, I just like looking," she said as she smiled up at him.

"Let's go in, let me buy it for you," he said, taking her hand as he looked for the entry.

"What? No, I don't want anything, I was just looking," Siana laughed, a little taken aback by his offer. She felt it was very impulsive - but maybe it was something Koreans did, or Korean celebrities. Maybe it was a thing, like knowing the first day a couple started going out. She was aware of their predilection for counting the number of days couples had been together - or was that just something she knew from watching dramas? She wasn't really sure at all. She thought of asking her mother later, but then realised that her mum was a different breed from her Korean family, and had long lost touch with any distant relatives she still had in Korea, let alone practised things the way they did there.

"Are you serious? I don't expect you to buy me any old thing I see, you know."

"But if it's something you like..."

"Then I will be happy to look at it and like it from this side of the glass, honestly! Or I would buy it myself. Anyway I don't want the dress." She looked at him with a grumpy face.

He laughed and tugged at the top of her ear. "So cute." She let him pull on her ear, but then he would not let go. She gave him a frown, looking sour. He giggled.

"You might think I was trying to get you to buy it for me." She shrugged her shoulder up to his hand, to get him to let go. He tried to pull on her other ear with his other hand, but she swatted his hand away before he could. He seemed to take it as a challenge, and Siana found herself batting his hands away. For a moment she felt like the Karate Kid as he tried to touch her hair, her ears, her face, as she backhanded and slapped away his attempts.

"What the- HEY!" Her eyes flared as she stuck him in the side of his neck with one hand and with the other, grabbed his wrist and pulled it down as she twisted it, making him wince and step towards her to alleviate the sharp pain. He had to bend his knees to give his wrist relief from her hold. He looked at her in surprise, his mouth falling open in shock - but then his eyes came alive with a threatening expression of "you did not just do that" - a dangerous half-smile on his lips. She faltered, he looked so sexy.

The boys turned to see why Leo had yelped, only to see him in the process of trying not to fall to his knees as she held him in her twisted wrist-lock.

She tried to stop herself smiling, but it just made her look impish, and it seemed to provoke him further. She let go of him and crossed her arms, a little scared of his expression, knowing that she had been quite forceful. He looked like he was about to pounce on her, and she felt a hysterical urge to turn and run.  
He straightened up, coming in closer to her as she lifted her chin defiantly.

She heard a whoop of encouragement from the boys, and turned to glare at them. Ken and Ravi looked away. She couldn't help but chuckle, as it was obvious they were rooting for the losing player.

"Is this your first fight?" Shouted N, "Because it's lame. Can you finish so we can order?"

"She's taking pity on you, stop trying, Leo Hyung," said Hongbin, shaking his head.

"Yeah, before she hurts your pride," chipped in Hyuk.

Leo softened his look with a smile that turned his eyes into a little boy's - which made her melt a little.

"Would you hurt my pride?" he drawled, looking down the bridge of his nose at her.

"You mean I didn't when I made you fall almost to your knees?" she raised her eyebrows. "Huh."

"You would have felt bad if you really hurt me so I had to adjust for your sake," he put his arms around her, trapping hers between them, and looked down at her.

"I regret nothing." She made a show of noticing his arms around her. "Is this your offensive strike? Trying to make me yield?"

"Yes. Is it working? I think it's working," He murmured, his eyes losing their smile as he watched her closely.

"Hurry up, Taekwoon-ah!" shuoted N. Leo ignored him.

"Eomma, Appa is gonna kiss that girl, eww!" squealed Ken.

N smacked him with a downward swipe. "If you don't shut up we'll miss it!" He glared dramatically at Ken as Hyuk and Ravi laughed. Hongbin shook his head and looked around for the waiter.

Siana smiled. It was working all right. She liked how he was trying to disarm her, charm her, manipulate her. She liked how he felt comfortable being like this in front of an audience, and how she felt comfortable too. She felt they were surrounded by friends whom they could trust.

She heard a camera click and turned to see N snapping a photo of them. Her mouth dropped open and she looked at Leo in surprise, hoiking her thumb at N as if to say, can you believe he did that?

But Leo dropped a kiss on her open mouth so quickly she didn't have time to respond. Then he took her hand and pulled her towards the boys.

She heard someone thump the table and the camera clicked again, too late.

"Ahh missed it!" said N, frustrated.

Leo pulled out a chair for her and after she had sat, pulled his own chair up close and huddled up next to her, a pleased smile on his face. He asked her if she was cold, if she wanted his jacket for her legs. She looked around at all the boys, who were smiling at them both rather comically. Hyuk leaned forward, a curious expression on his face.

"Ermm... who are you and what have you done to our Leo?" he asked him, making the boys laugh.

"Yes Leo, you look like you've won a race or something. You know, something like happiness," N said disdainfully.

"But Siana-ssi merely looks perplexed," stated Hongbin dryly. Siana giggled.

"I'm being boyfriendy," Leo said in a sweet voice, looking shy and proud at the same time. Siana could have squealed, it was too cute.

"Oh, so that's what that is," Hongbin said, still deadpan.

Siana could see that this was a side to Leo the boys may not have seen before. Although she was certain that, despite his often sombre, serious persona, his sense of humour tended towards dry sarcasm and silly dad jokes. But going from being very secretive about his feelings towards her, to being boyfriendy, as he put it, must have been new.

Well, it was to her, anyway. He seemed impulsive, overly generous and zealously caring. Brimming with joy.

It was strange, and wildly catching, curiously. She could feel giggles rising in her throat, her breath quickening and her heartbeat loud in her ears.

And boyfriendy - what a powerful effect him saying that had on her. He was proclaiming their status to the world, or at least, his world of friends. It was like a drug, heady and exciting, and she loved being pulled along in its wake, despite his unsettling desire to do things for her she hadn't expected or asked for.

She felt herself blushing, heating up. She bowed her head to hide her stupid grin, letting her ponytail fall forward. Leo noticed and pulled it back over her shoulder, causing her to glance up at him shyly. They smiled like idiots at each other.

As one, the boys groaned and looked around, calling for the waiter. They ordered and chatted as they waited for coffees, hot chocolates and snacks.

Eventually they thought of contacting Kkomae and Min Seok, and found they were in a small cafe across the street from the square, which was off a long set of stairs that rose up the face of the mountain and took pedestrians up through small alleys and twisting turning lanes. They could see them through the cafe window and they waved at each other.

Siana suddenly mentioned that they had shot some scenes in Descendants of the Sun in Arachova. N and Leo sat up, excited.

"Really? With the clock tower? And the arms dealers?" N asked. Siana nodded.

"We can walk there from here," she said, adding, "but if you want to take pictures it might be best to go now while the sun is still in the sky. The sunset will be beautiful. The nightlife is a little more exciting here too, if you guys want to go out. On the weekends, people drive up from Athens to get away. There's always a DJ in town or an interesting crowd."

Ravi and Ken looked interested in that, but the others seemed to want to go back to Itea for the evening. Siana too - she had classes to teach in the morning, early.

After a bit of debate, she got up suddenly and ran lightly over the street to go see Kkomae and Min Seok. A quick discussion revealed that they would try to accommodate what all the boys wanted to do, even if they had to split to chaperone two groups, or if they had to make two trips back and forth.

"I can easily call a taxi driver and ask him to pick up anyone from a club here to send back later after the night ends, so you guys can go home too if you want," Siana offered.

Kkomae shook his head. "One of us must stay with the boys if they want to go to a club," he stated simply. Siana understood it was to make sure they didn't drink themselves silly or get mobbed if they were recognised, although she doubted either scenario would eventuate.

"I guess it's two trips for the driver, then," she surmised, glancing at Min Seok, who nodded peaceably.

She realised looking after artistes was not that much of a glamorous job, but rather more like being a mother, or a warden: tiring, selfless and ultimately all about the wards - in this case, the Vixx boys.

"Okay, shall we leave in about a half hour? We're going to walk to the clock tower where they shot that scene from Descendants of the Sun."

Kkomae and Min Seok sat up, mouths agape.

"Are you serious? I LOVED that show," Min Seok gushed, surprising Siana with his sudden outpouring.

"I know, me too," she nodded. "You guys should do a trip to Zakynthos, with the shipwreck."

"You mean that's a real shipwreck, not a set?"

Siana loved Min Seok's reactions to finding out the locales were real and he could see them for himself.

"We're coming too," Joon said, getting up after a last swig of his coffee.

They crossed back across to the square, where Siana could see everyone was already finishing off drinks. Leo was nowhere to be seen, so she supposed he had gone to pay or gone to the bathroom.

As they began walking, she saw him come out of the boutique, a paper bag in his hand. He walked over to her, looking a little abashed, and held it out to her, his eyes cast down at the bag.

"You didn't have to do this," she said, taking it gently. She didn't want to make him feel bad, but she felt it was a waste that he had gone to buy it for her. But the bag felt a little light, and she opened it to peer inside.

"They didn't have a smaller bag," he said, by way of explanation.

Inside was a small black hair elastic with red plastic bobbles on it that looked like cherries. She smiled, happy, and reached inside to pull it out.

"Do you like it? I saw it and thought of you," he said quietly.

"I love it," she smiled, looking up at him. He looked so pleased she thought he would burst. She thought her heart would burst too, she liked this gift so much.

It's elastic and plastic, she thought, but no other gift could be lovelier to me.

She beamed at him, and they held each other's gaze for a moment. Then, he took her hand and they followed the others up the road towards the clock tower.

Before they reached the clock tower, they had to pass by the council building in front of which Siana had taken her selfie just a week before.

Siana stood by the wayside with Leo a little behind her, their little fingers loosely interlocked, and hidden from view. They didn't speak to each other or look at each other, but she felt as if every fibre of her being was aware of that tiny point of contact between them. Ravi and Hongbin were already walking on ahead to the clocktower which was just a few metres away, and Hyuk and Ken were watching the others taking their selfies.

N, Kkomae and Min Seok were excited to recognise the setting, and were taking their own photos just like she had.

Siana laughed, saying to N, "I made Dad stop on the street so I could do the same when I arrived last week." She wondered again whether they would share their pictures on social media.

"Are you guys going to post any pictures?"

N answered as he flicked through the pictures he had in his phone. "Well, we can't expose our location for security reasons. And we are all supposed to be on hiatus."

"But we can post selfies, right?" asked Ken. "It's been a while."

Siana nodded. N noticed and commented, "You follow us on social media, Siana-ssi?"

Siana shrugged, trying to look nonchalant, and avoiding making eye contact with anyone.

OF COURSE I DO, N.

She felt Leo start swinging their hands back and forth gently behind her back, as if they were playing a nursery game. She smiled as she wagged his hand back.

"Won't starlights be wondering why you're all inactive?" she asked.

"Maybe we should post pictures from indoors," ventured Hyuk.

"Why are we hiding our location anyway?" Ken asked N. N looked at Kkomae, who shrugged.

"Noone asked you to hide anything. You're free to post whatever you want," Kkomae said as he shrugged and moved on.

Ken and Hyuk looked accusingly at N. N held up his hands and siad, "Did I ever forbid you to post anything while we were here? It was just something we all assumed to do."

"Well it doesn't matter for you since you post so infrequently," Hyuk said.

"That's only on IG, elsewhere I am pretty active," N countered.

Ken turned to Hyuk with a sour expression.

"And on IG he has the most followers. What a waste," he said, turning up his nose.

"I try not to spoil my followers and always give them quality updates," N drawled, still checking out his pictures on his phone.

"That's the second time in my life I have been called cheap," Hyuk said, clutching his heart and rubbing it as if it were sore.

"You should ask yourself why," N continued, unperturbed.

Ken turned on Hyuk with a laugh, "Yeah, you're an IG slut, Hyukkie." Hyuk nodded happily and smiled till his eyes crinkled up.

Leo smiled to himself as Siana listened to the banter, feeling entertained by their soft-spoken barbs.

"Don't post anything with even a little of the scenery in the background. Someone will figure out where we are, and we still have about two or three more weeks of peace left," Hongbin reminded everyone.

"If you want to post a location, wait til we have left it before you do it," N murmured, eyes on his photos.

Siana felt that familiar regretful feeling she had felt before the flight launch earlier, when she realised how they had to be wary of exposing themselves too much.

She mused, maybe I'm just being too precious about it. Don't I watch what I say or keep my own secrets to avoid exposing myself to criticism in my own life too? Or even to avoid hurting others.

Perhaps the boys were just being mature and wise, and her feelings of discontent were just her being fanciful, overly protective and not minding her own business. After all, the pluses of being who they were, were too big to walk away from.

She leaned against Leo, and felt him disentangle his hand and slip it under her jacket to touch the back of her waist for a moment, before putting it around her shoulder and holding her close. She sighed, feeling happy and melty. N looked up and noticed, and smiled at her for a sweet moment before looking at Leo. His smiled disappeared.

"Honestly, I can't stand your face right now," he said, snapping a quick picture.

Siana glanced up, but she only managed to catch Leo looking at N in surprise.

"Hey, come on, just delete it-" began Leo, but N interrupted him.

"Don't worry, I just took your smug and self-satisfied mug, you can't see Siana's face."

Siana felt Leo's arm leave her shoulder abruptly as he stepped towards N to take his phone. N turned it so he could see. Siana peered around Leo's shoulder to have a look.

Although she felt a little put out by Leo and N's interaction, she loved the picture. Leo was smiling with his eyes closed. He really did look smug and self-satisfied, like a cat who got his milk.

But she wasn't sure how to feel about his immediate desire to have the picture deleted. Didn't he want pictures of them together? Not that it was one, because as N said, her face couldn't be seen.

She had to talk herself and her feelings down a little. She knew, of course she knew, that he had issues with privacy - in particular hers.  
She realised they would have to talk about this because she didn't fancy having to think twice about their behaviour in public. And didn't he already make a big decision about this, wasn't that the point of his confession just a few hours ago? Siana felt a little confused, even as she felt elated that he seemed so protective of her.

She had made it quite clear to him that she would be happy with whatever time they had together til he left.

But he had insisted that this could be something more, and she had finally understood that it was a possibility, and understood why she shouldn't just dismiss that possibiliity.

But now, she felt she was being pulled into an uncomfortable world where one's natural feelings and impulses had to be curbed, censored and watched. Not by her, but by him.

She felt as if she was not being given a choice, even though she understood that he was being protective.

And if he really believed that they could be serious - why was he intent on being secretive right off the bat?

She felt like she should know the answer - but her feelings were too strong for her to understand it other than mentally.

She looked at Leo's face as he studied the picture carefully. She could see that he was trying to decide whether he should insist on deleting it, and it made her sad that he was so caught up in it.

"It' s a nice picture. Keep it," she said, putting a hand on his.

N took back the phone before Leo could do anything.

"She's right, anyway it's my phone and I know how to protect people's privacy, Jung Taekwoon," he said in a huff. He turned, offering his arm to Siana, who hooked hers around his elbow. They both gave Leo a sad look before they walked off, leaving Leo standing there.

N leaned in to Siana, patting her arm.

"You know he's just being over-protective, yes?"

"Yeah, I get it," Siana murmured, looking ahead as they walked.

"Siana-ssi, don't over-think it. You can't both live in your heads. Somebody has to let their heart lead."

N nudged her with his shoulder.

"Anyway, he's trying to be your hero," N said, looking her in the eye.

Siana's heart leapt. N had put it so meaningfully - and she suddenly felt the weight of years of friendship and loyalty behind his words.

When she looked into his eyes, she could see that he was emotional, and it made her emotional too.

"Aww, N!" she said, feeling tears well up. She could see sudden tears in his eyes too, and they both arm-hugged each other as they kept walking. Siana started to giggle, feeling her confusion and discontent turn suddenly into a well of happiness.

N giggled along with her, then turned to glance surreptitiously behind him.

"Look at that poor beggar, thinking he has control over his heart," N whispered.

Siana looked behind her. Leo was just standing there, but N had said it just right, again. She laughed, feeling enormously happy.

"N, you're the best," she said, feeling so much better. He had said something she needed to hear, that had put everything into perspective for her.

"I know. I know," he said.

"I hope you will always be his friend," she spluttered without thinking. Now it was N's turn to look happy.

"And I hope we can keep you, friend," he said, squeezing her arm again.

They walked on, leaving Triple T behind.

**

They reached the clocktower and walked a little way down a large stone stairway towards its base. The clock had been built atop an outcrop of rock that jutted out of the deep valley that ran alongside the eastern boundaries of Arachova and down under the town towards the olive groves below. The town itself seemed to be suspended above the valley, but in truth it seemed so because of the depth of the valley that fell away beneath it.

The clocktower itself was not beautiful, in fact it was a rather utilitarian square brick building with a clock on each side. Its charm lay in its location and how it stood away from the rest of the town and offered a view of the entire valley and the mountain face opposite.

As they approached, Siana saw the main road which snaked its way out of Arachova towards Athens split into a stone road that traversed the lower face of the mountain and had been built into a row of shops that were faced with stone arches. The shops stood under the main road and created a picturesque piece of real estate that made a beautiful background to the clock tower.

She could see a bus load of asian tourists had already spent some time there and were making their way back towards the main road junction.

"It's going to get crowded soon if we take too long," she mentioned, her logistical instincts kicking in after three years of helping her dad arrange outings for their guests. If the tourists headed towards the clock tower, they could crowd the base or someone might recognise the boys. The probability of them being recognised was higher, though she knew they had pockets of hardcore fans around the world. Kkomae nodded, herding the boys ahead along up the stairs towards the base of the clock.

As they stepped out onto the small area at the base of the tower, they could see why the site was chosen for the drama's location. The views were pretty, but they could imagine how beautiful it would look from the air or from across the valley.

"I wish we had the drone camera here," murmured Min Seok.

"We should get some footage," Min Seok said, as Kkomae unpacked one of the pro cameras on its stick. He pulled it out to full length and gave it to Ken.

"360 please, and make it cheery, thank you," he instructed.

Ken dutifully looked into camera, blinking and puffing out his cheeks with the obligatory cute poses as he waited for Hyuk and Ravi to crowd around him. Then he started a slow turn, and as the boys got in sync with him, they became more animated, smiling, jumping as they turned and calling out greetings and laughing.

They slowed to a stop, excited from the effort, and passed the camera back to Kkomae, who turned to N.

"You know I get dizzy doing that," N said.

"Then check your hair for two minutes as usual," Kkomae replied.

Hongbin stepped in close, turning to look for Leo and tugging his sleeve to get him in shot.

N began a non-stop introduction, firstly with their greeting, and then about where they were, and Siana marvelled at how he was able to keep a smooth flow of talk whilst saying very little. When he stopped talking, Hongbin picked up just as smoothly, putting in a little info here and there about what they had done that day and how happy he was that he could share his journey with starlights. Suddenly, he turned to Leo, and he and N waited for a beat as Leo looked unblinkingly into the camera, then turned to each other to continue talking.

As they did, Leo looked off camera to Siana and turned up the corner of his mouth in a smirk.

She pursed her lips. Shouldn't he be concentrating? Wouldn't fans be wondering where he would be looking when they saw that onscreen? She could also see that they were very smooth, even when things looked like they were going wrong. She supposed they had been doing this for many years and would have good dynamics on camera that allowed them to be free and easy with each other whilst mentally ticking off a checklist of things they had to fulfil during filming.

She heard N sign off and bring the camera down to view the footage with Kkomae. Behind them she could see Min Seok had taken the second pro camera and was trying to get a pretty shot of them all from as far as he could extend his arm out beyond the railings. Then he turned to get down low on the ground to capture the clock tower in its entirety from a low angle.

She marvelled at how quickly they managed to get footage and complete presenting to the camera.

She heard footsteps below and looked down to see the tourists were indeed coming up to see the tower and the view. Kkomae noticed also and gently warned the boys, who paired off and began walking towards the exit. Siana could see that they were not all going to make it down the stairs before the tourists came up. She wasn't sure if she should hang back or go with them, but Kkomae nudged her forward so that she fell into step behind N and Hongbin, who were first.  
She turned to glance back at Leo, who was coming down last with Hyuk. With a tiny smile he zipped his jacket up to his chin and shook his hair into his eyes.  
Siana turned to walk on. Did he think that would really help disguise himself? Some fans would recognise him even if he was zipped up closed into a sleeping bag, she thought to herself, laughing. She was sure she could recognise members by the shape of their bodies, the way they walked and their mannerisms.

Pretty creepy, Siana, was her next thought.

She had even identified members on social media just from pictures of parts of their bodies - and that filled her with a familiar mixture of pride and shame.

Oh Siana, you're a little bit sad, but also a lot devoted. She smiled as she scampered down the steps.

She noticed that N and Hongbin walked quite nonchalantly and unhurriedly out onto the main road, managing to bypass the tourists quickly, who had their eyes on the tower and the shops. She was next, and Ravi and Ken after. They all walked up to the main road back towards the municipal council building where they gathered and waited for the others.

She could see there was a hold up as the last two, Leo and Hyuk, were stationary and posing with people she couldn't see. She saw Kkomae hurry them along when they were done, letting the boys come up first so that he could close ranks with Min Seok behind them.

"Some local girls recognised us!" Hyuk said excitedly.

"Not the tourists?" Ravi asked.

"No, wrong demo," Min Seok said.

"What is the Vixx demographic anyway?" Siana asked, a little afraid they would say 18-25 year olds with nothing better to do than pine over their Vixx posters. Or worse, 10-15 year olds. What would that make her? She glanced at Leo, remembering that she had recently fantasised that he had played a silly trick on her in an elevator. She felt herself reddening as they turned to look at her.

"Anyone who likes good vocals, good visuals and good value. In excelsis," said N, proudly. Hongbin looked at him in disbelief, pushing him away.

"We've had six-year olds sing us the lyrics to Hot Enough," said Ravi.

"It's disturbing, but we do not judge," Ken said magnanimously, pulling up his trousers.

"And then their mothers slip us their business cards," added Hongbin.

"And the mothers' brother gives us his handphone number," giggled Ravi.

"That's not the worst of it," Kkomae said, shaking his head. The boys erupted in laughter over mutual memories of Kkomae's past predicaments.

"Kkomae has received his own share of dubious advances," explained Hyuk.

"Love letters in his back pocket."

"Cupcakes in his backpack."

" 'Personal Massagers' in the company letterbox," said Hyuk, making air quotes with his fingers. Siana watched as the boys giggled over Kkomae's discomfort. She found that shocking, but not unbelievable.

"All of them for us, not for him," Ken said, smiling.

"I still feel violated. I have family!" Kkomae said, zipping the camera back into his bag.

"His mother and his dog," Hyuk drawled.

"Anyway, we should go," Kkomae commanded, fishing keys out of his pocket.

"What about the clubs?" Siana asked, remembering that Ken and Ravi wanted to stay to sample the nightlife. Kkomae's face screwed up as he remembered that too. He looked at Ravi and Ken despondently. They smiled down at him, refusing to budge.

"You want to wait here til they open?" You will be alone because Min Seok had to drive us back first."

"We should be fine. We'll have dinner," Ken said.

"It's so early, you still have about four or five hours til the clubs get going after ten," Kkomae said.

"I can ask Panos if he wants to come join you if you like," Siana suggested. The boys looked at Siana in surprise.

"Wouldn't he be at his own club?"

"Not every night. If he doesn't have to be there tonight, I'm sure he would go with you."

Siana saw Hongbin's face light up at the prospect of Panos joining them - but then he remembered he was tired and wanted to go home. She smiled at him, knowing that he had been meeting up with Panos for basketball with Hyuk and Ken during the week. She pulled out her phone to text her cousin.

_Some of the boys want to go clubbing in Arachova. You feel like babysitting them tonight?_ She texted.

__He promptly replied. _What kind of fan are you? Don't you mean babe-sitting?___ She rolled her eyes.

_____They need to be accompanied so the staff member Min Seok will be there too._ _ _ _ _

_____Ok, who's going?_ _ _ _ _

Siana looked up at Hongbin _ _ _ _ _ _. "Do you want to stay?"_ _ _ _ _ _

"Yes but I was looking forward to showering, changing, lying down and going to sleep," Hongbin said, a little forlornly. She laughed.

"How about just showering and changing, then Panos can pick you up before he drives up? You can nap on the way home."

Hongbin looked surprised. "Oh. A great solution. Yes!" She nodded, going back to texting.

_______Ken, Ravi and Hongbin._ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______My new brothers! Ok, I'm up for it._______ He replied. She could feel the happiness from Panos through her phone.

Siana thought of something. "But then what about Min Seok-ssi? Are you still going to come up again after dropping us off?"

Min Seok nodded matter-of-factly. "Someone must be with them from the company."

Siana nodded, wondering if the boys ever felt they were putting their staff out by making unscheduled personal trips like this.

"Maybe you should just stay here with them and relax for dinner rather than driving down and back up again. I mean, if you want to. Panos can drop you home all together, after the night has ended."

Min Seok looked at Kkomae, who nodded.

They all walked towards the square, where the boys who were staying said their goodbyes and got themselves a table to have an early dinner. The rest walked on towards the other end of town where the van was parked.

Kkomae and N got in the front whilst Siana, Leo and Hongbin got in the back, sitting all in a row.

The drive down was quiet as the sun had gone and darkness was looming. There was little traffic, but Kkomae who was unfamiliar with the twists and turns in the sometimes steep journey down, drove carefully and rather slowly, lulling his passengers to sleep.

**

Siana awoke when the van lurched to a stop outside their building.

In her sleep her head had dropped on to Leo's shoulder and she had turned to put her arm across his body. She was practically drooling onto his chest and she sat up quickly to wipe her mouth, checking to make sure that he hadn't noticed. Thank goodness she hadn't thrown a leg over him and hugged him like a bolster.

He was asleep too, his arms crossed over his slouched body and his face turned towards the window. No drooling.

How was it that he was sleeping perfectly poised like that? She heard a little snicker from the front and turned her tired sleepy head to see.

She was aghast to find Kkomae and N had turned to look at them all in the back, and were watching her with amused expressions.

"Comfortable, Siana-ssi?"

Siana looked at N as he wrinkled his nose in an attempt to look prudish. She cleared her throat and smoothed back her hair.

"I slept very well, thank you."

"I am sure of that," N drawled, turning back and gasping suddenly. He froze, looking out the window.

Siana turned to look, and saw that her father was standing on the kerb, watching them all.

She sat up, pulling her jacket close and blinking the sleep out of her eyes. Her father smiled and crooked his index finger at her, beckoning for her to come out.  
"I can't tell if he is in a good or bad humour," N said out of the corner of his mouth.

"He's fine, my dad's okay," Siana said, although she was just as unsure as N. She couldn't tell what he was thinking, but from experience knew that her dad was accepting of all kinds of behaviour.

N and Kkomae got out of the car, greeting her dad respectfully. N immediately got chatting to him, and Siana felt a little like he was trying to allay any fears her father might have by distracting him with chatter about what they had done that day and how tired they were from the drive down.

She stepped over Hongbin's feet and unlocked the door to slide it open. The noise didn't even wake him as she hopped onto the kerb to approach the others. She wondered if Hongbin would be making it back to Arachova this evening after all.

Mikhalis stared her down as she approached, ignoring N's chatter.

"How was your day?" He looked at her with a mixture of concern and reserve. Perhaps he didn't like what he had seen in the back seat of the bus? Although she knew he was fairly open, she had never been found sprawled across a boy's body by him before. A man's body, she corrected herself. She felt a little embarrassed, but not for having done it, just for putting her father in the position of finding her like that.

"It was good. Tiring."

"Then it will be an early night for you, yes?" Mikhalis said, reaching an arm out to put around her shoulders. Siana stepped into his embrace and gave him a sideways hug, her smile radiating warmth as she squeezed him back.

"Yes, but we haven't eaten yet," she said, a little sleepily. Mikhalis looked into the bus.

"Well, we can remedy that straight away. But where are the others?"

"They stayed on to go clubbing. Later Panos will come pick up Hongbin and join them too."

N walked over to the boys and shook Hongbin, who opened his big eyes one by one, looking at N with stony silence. Siana saw Leo stir, but all he did was turn to his side and curl up a little more.

She sighed as she watched him get more comfortable, he looked so contented. Then she met eyes with her dad, who waggled his eyebrows at her.

She giggled. So he had caught her mooning over a sleeping man, so what?

"Hey, sleeping princes, it's time to get up. Hurry and say hello to Mr Mikhalis!" N's voice took on a sharp quality, rather how mums' voices did when they wanted their children to understand that it was time to take things seriously.

She was surprised to see both Leo and Hongbin sit up, take deep breaths and come straight out of the car, smoothing out their clothes and hair as they did. Although their faces still bore evidence of having woken suddenly from sleep, their eyes were alert and focused, and they filed out of the car almost like cadets falling in line.

Still in their embrace, she and her father watched them, surprised by their alacrity, which they seemed to pull from the depths of whatever energy reserves they kept tucked away just for moments like these.

Although she knew her dad didn't expect them to behave this way - and he tried to gesture to them not to bother - she felt good seeing them pay their respects.

She tried to catch Leo's eye, but he was keeping his gaze on Mikhalis. They bowed politely. She smiled, tucking her head against her dad's shoulder.

"N you should have let them sleep," Mikhalis started.

"It's alright, we needed to lock the car and Hongbin has to get ready anyway," N said chirpily. She saw Leo nod as Hongbin smiled at her dad.

"And nothing wakes sleeping boys better than the dread of being rude to a senior," said Kkomae as he stuck his hand out to pull the door shut and remote lock the doors. Hongbin shook his head.

"Nothing!" he agreed cheerfully, smiling at Mikhalis. Leo finally dropped his gaze to look at Siana out of the corner of his eye, poker faced. She smiled up at him, her cheeks feeling rosy as her dad's arm hung around her shoulders. She felt utterly contented and only wanted for something to eat.

"Well, just so you know, I don't stand on ceremony like that," Mikhalis said. He turned to Kkomae.

"I can order us some food - would you all like to join us downstairs later? I will set up the table outside."

Kkomae and N looked at each other to see if they agreed. Leo, whose expression was straight all this time, finally let the corner of his lip lift in a miniscule smirk as he responded to her smile.

"That would be very nice, Mr Mikhalis - but I think we need to change first. Or perhaps-" N glanced at Kkomae before continuing, "What do you think about coming up to our place? It will be warm and there's more space."

Kkomae nodded, looking at Mikhalis, who looked down at Siana, and caught her smiling at Leo. Mikhalis stopped himself from following her gaze to look at Leo, turning back to N and Kkomae to nod at them.

"Let's say half an hour?"

They walked into the lobby. Mikhalis called for the lift, then wandered back into his apartment to make the order.

Hongbin and Kkomae took the stairs so that Hongbin could get a head start getting ready as the others waited for the lift.

Siana waited with N and Leo for the lift to arrive and they packed themselves neatly into the cab, finding there was just enough space for them to stand comfortably.

N bowed his head, not looking at either of them as Siana stood in front of Leo, both of them facing the same way. The space was so close that she could hear Leo's breathing, which was still deep and chesty from his sleep.

They stopped at her floor, and Leo got out with Siana, telling N that he would be up in a moment.

"Yes, just a few moments because you will be helping to clean up before Siana's Father comes to the house for dinner," N said warningly, emphatically.

Siana smiled at N as the door swung shut and he continued up. She walked to her door, then turned to look up at Leo, who was slouching behind her with his hands in his jacket pockets.

"You don't have to see me home," she said quietly.

"Yes I do, it's polite," he said. He stopped just next to her, his sleepy eyes staring at her half-closed from resting and also from being at a height.

"I know how to get to your place from here, you don't have to wait, I will be fine," she smiled, as she fished her keys out of her jacket pocket.

"I'm not here for you," he smiled back, leaning down a little so that the tip of his nose touched the bridge of hers lightly.

She lifted her chin, expecting that he would kiss her, but he just looked at her with a tiny smile that went all the way up to his crinkled eyes.

"I had a good day today," she said.

"Me too. Can we have another good day together tomorrow?"

"After I finish teaching downstairs, yes. We can go have lunch."

He nodded, stepping back slowly. She felt this was her cue to go in, but she just wanted to keep looking at him. He, seeing her hesitate, stopped short of turning to go up the stairs.

"Please go, we might end up standing here forever," she said, laughing.

"Sounds horrible."

With that, he turned and bounded up the stairs, leaving her shaking her head as she let herself into her home.

**

Hongbin came out of his room, showered and dressed for the night. He had already exchanged numbers with Panos earlier in the week, even though they had ended up just meeting for basketball every day in the afternoon. He had often gone with Ken and Hyuk and the three of them had taken a real liking to Panos and his cousins. After playing, if Panos wasn't rushing back home, they would walk down to the jetty and get snacks form the periptero that was open in the afternoon, or they would sit for drinks at Miami.

Panos had just texted him to say he would be there to collect him in a few minutes.

"I'm going, guys," he said in the general direction of the living area. There was no response, and he could hear someone pottering around in the kitchen, banging cabinet doors and jangling with the cutlery.

He walked towards the kitchen, wanting to make sure someone was aware he was leaving.

He found N piling cutlery onto a stack of plates and taking it from the kitchen to the living room sofas in front of the fireplace. Leo had been assigned broom duty, and he was busy shifting sofas to sweep under them. Hongbin was not surprised to see that he didn't look happy, even though he did the task he was given with care.

"Just think of it as making Siana and her father happy, Hyung," Hongbin said with a smile.

"Then why does it feel like I am doing this to make N happy?" Leo asked.

"Well, there it is, the truth of the matter," Hongbin whispered conspirationally to him. Leo smiled as he continued working. "Which is why I said to just THINK of it as making Siana happy. Then it won't hurt so much."

Leo straightened up, laughing and nodding. Hongbin was happy to see Leo was in good spirits, and happier knowing it had to do with Siana. He was seeing her in a better and better light, even though she had already started out by making a great impression on him in the first place. He knew that even though physical attraction had a lot to do with two people coming together, there had to be something else that would attract a somewhat reluctant man like Leo to her.  
Hongbin felt that there was a mixture of charm and maturity that she possessed, something that kept her real, and he had seen a moment of that when she had shown a vulnerable side of herself to him at dinner that night in Delphi. He had felt a bit like he was intruding on a private moment that should have been shared with Leo - and he knew that Leo had harboured jealousy about that for a while. But, it was incidental that it was he who had witnessed it, because anyone could have noticed she was not comfortable before he did. He just happened to be the one who did.

Having spent a lot of time with Panos over the past week, he had heard stories and impressions of Siana from the point of view of someone who knew her very well, and didn't hold back from the truth about who she was. He had enjoyed listening to anecdotes about their childhood together as wannabe street urchins playing during siesta, and also about how things had gone for her family when everything started to fall apart, and her eventual leaving of Itea.

It had been a few years before she began returning regularly, and she had grown from a sunny, tomboyish child into a gorgeous young woman whose determination hadn't drowned out that cheery happiness that she brought. Hongbin could tell Panos was very proud and protective of Siana, and that to some extent, they were soul mates.

Much as Hongbin was happy for Leo, and much as he was cheering for them both to be happy, Hongbin was beginning to feel protective of Siana too. Perhaps some of Panos' sentiment was rubbing off on him, but he wanted very much to make sure that Leo would treat Siana right, because the possibility that things could turn out badly for her was still there. She would only have Leo to depend on if things got tough. Hongbin wondered how much Leo would be open to the change that could come.

N had placed the plates on the table between the sofas and straightened up to look around. Leo made a final sweep and bent down to collect dust and bits and pieces into a dustpan.

"Who leaves wrappers on the floor?!" N asked, irritated, as he saw what Leo had swept up.

"Ken. Ravi. Leo." Hongbin stated, looking at his phone.

"I don't eat in the living room," Leo said, denial mode on.

"Oh yeah, you eat it in your room then bring the rubbish out here and dump it with someone else's," Hongbin retorted. Leo nodded good-naturedly.

"The trashcan is just two metres away! Just put it straight in there! Is the target too small for you, Mr Dream Team?!" N said, taking a swipe at Leo as he walked back into the kitchen. Leo just laughed. Hongbin realised that if Leo hadn't been so willing to clean up after himself, or to be bossed around in penance for his dirty habit, he would some off as curmudgeonly rather than as adorable, as he was now.

The seeming duality of his personality was what made him so charming, Hongbin mused. He could be charismatic, handsome, almost heroic in stature, but could also be painfully self-conscious, awkward and socially clumsy. Then again, he could be extremely self-aware, attention-seeking and a poser - but could dissolve into silly giggles, and indulged his old man sense of humour any time he could.

Who could compare to that? Hongbin thought. A vibrant, captivating girl like Siana wouldn't want for anything, with a man like Leo.  
Hongbin looked at Leo as he straightened up and shuffled in his house slippers to empty the dust pan into the kitchen trash. He felt a little surprised at his train of thought. Was he comparing himself to Leo?

Hongbin has always prided himself on keeping calm and maintaining level-headedness. The only inkling people had as to the depth of his emotions was the sharpness of his sarcastic comments - which he rarely let out of his control. But at this very moment he felt that that levelheadedness was boring. Stodgy. He didn't understand why he was thinking of himself that way, he had always been content to follow a steady, hardworking path in his life.

He got a message on his phone - Panos was downstairs.

"I'm going, have fun," he pivoted gracefully and was out of the house in seconds. Downstairs, Panos was waiting in the car, and they set off for Arachova in high spirits.

Hongbin decided that he was not going to let himself feel down on a rare night when he could go out with his old and new friends. Arachova seemed to offer them a great opportunity to experience some nightlife as themselves - although it was a small town, it promised some good times with it being a gathering place for urbanites and socialites. They could expect to have some personal space and maybe let go a little.

He thought of Min Seok for a moment, knowing that he would probably love to let loose and join in the fun too, but unfortunately he was on duty this evening. Hongbin had long stopped feeling sorry for the staff who had to work even when they were having fun. Having spoken to them and found out how they felt about it, he knew that sometimes they wished they could relax too, but that they had to view their job as looking after precious goods.

Knowing that made Hongbin realise two disparate things: that he was more or less just a product of the company brand, and that the staff's impartiality afforded him great privileges he couldn't have otherwise. He felt very grateful, yet was aware that, like the staff, his own needs really didn't figure much in the grand scheme of things - and he was alright with that. It seemed to be the way of the world, that the individual would eventually have to compromise for the sake of the whole - be that a company, a family, a society, or even a couple.

That word got him thinking about the couple in their midst. He already knew what kind of compromises Leo faced.

But what compromise would Siana have to make?

"You are thinking about much, my friend," Panos said, looking at him out of the side of his eye.

"Oh, we had a lot of fun today. Thank you for arranging it. I was thinking about your cousin and my Hyung - they seem to be a couple now."

"And is that a good or a bad thing? Because you look troubled."

Hongbin raised his eyebrows. Did he? He supposed he might look troubled if he was preoccupied with his thoughts.

"No, it is good for them. We are pleased to say we approve of Siana," he joked, adding, "Very much. I hope you feel the same about our Taekwoon."

Panos laughed.

"Any man Siana chooses is a good choice," he said simply.

Hongbin nodded, looking down at hands. He suddenly felt awkward, unsure of what to say.

"You are still worried about something," Panos nudged.

"Well, at first I was very excited about the possibility of a romance for Hyung, but now I am thinking of what this means for Siana."

"Aaah," Panos nodded. "Because you are all leaving soon. But isn't it best to wait and see what happens? Take things as they come?"

Hongbin screwed up his nose.

"What is that? I mean, what kind of relationship would that be?"

Panos thought for a minute.

"I see what you mean. So, perhaps it is more serious than I thought. Oh. I see. What happens when it is time to go? How do they expect to continue their relationship?"

Hongbin nodded. It was suddenly quiet in the car. Hongbin laughed a little awkwardly.

"I didn't mean to bring the mood down," he said sheepishly. Panos laughed.

"Well, there's not much we can do about it. Let them have some time to get to know each other better and enjoy the early sparks before they have to start thinking about this heavy stuff."

Hongbin nodded, finding some relief in Panos' words. He would have some fun with the boys tonight, and think about it tomorrow.

They continued their drive in silence, both of them lost in thought.

Hongbin sighed.

He still couldn't shake the feeling that Siana needed to be careful, more so than Pabo Hyung.

**

Siana decided to go downstairs and escort her father up. She had showered and put on fresh sweats over a camisole, and rugged up with a cheap, synthetic and totally warm and comfortable blanket she had bought from the markets a year ago. No regrets, better than the real thing, she thought, as she pulled her door shut and bound down the three flights of stairs to knock on her father's door.

As she waited, she heard the door opposite open, and turned to see her father coming out of the studio, turning off the last light and letting the door swing shut, before locking it.

"Ana, my love, I was just coming up," he said when she came up to join him at the lift. He pushed the button, summoning it down, then put a hand out to ruffle her drying hair.

"You'll get sick walking around in the cold like that," he said, before pulling back his hand suddenly. Siana looked at him in surprise.

"That's what your mother used to say."

"Yeah, you always told her to let me be. Anyway, I rarely get sick from walking around with wet hair. That's just a fallacy. Germs. Germs make you sick."

Mikhalis pushed her shoulder, making her giggle.

"Smarty pants."

"Like my mother," she said proudly, smiling up at him. He nodded. "That is true."

The lift arrived and they got in. as they started riding up, Siana thought that she should say something about herself and Leo rather than let her father see or deduce something on his own during dinner. He had already seen enough to make some assumptions, but she felt it was only right.

"About Leo and I." She turned her head to look up at him, while he kept his smiling eyes fixed on the passing concrete and elevator safety doors as the cab rambled upwards.

"Yeeeees?"

"Well, there has been a development."

"I deduced that from watching my little girl snuggling with him in the back of the car just now."

Siana cringed. Yuuurrrghhh this was uncomfortable.

"Sorry about that, but in all honesty I wasn't aware I was doing it til I woke up."

Mikhalis lay a heavy hand on her shoulder.

"I've done worse, and if you keep going on about it, I will tell you every detail."

"Dad!" He laughed as she shrugged off his hand.

"Aww, if you're going to be an adult, I promise I will act like one too," he smiled, snuggling against her and planting a kiss on her head.

"Does your mother know?"

Siana gasped. She hadn't even thought about her mum, she had been so busy dancing and trying not to think about Leo all week.

"Maybe I should call her and tell her everything," Mikhalis joked.

Siana looked at him in surprise. This was the first time he had really expressed any intent to contact her mother since the divorce, even if it was in jest. She nodded vigorously.

"Dad, that's a great idea!"

Mikhalis sobered pretty quickly at the thought. He had never tried to contact Jenny because she had asked him to let the break be clean, to let them go on with their lives. He had been heartbroken, but he knew that she had carried her own heartbreak for much longer. She didn't try to stop him being Siana's father, but she made it clear that their lives were separate and that as the primary carer, things would go as she desired when it came to Siana's livelihood.

He shook his head, his smile a little sadder.

"Ah, much as I would like to share some gossip about you and your boy with your mother, it would be very inappropriate for me to call her out of the blue just to chat."

Siana pushed open the lift door as it came to a stop, and they stepped out into the lobby that led directly to the penthouse door. She pressed the doorbell and heard it sound inside.

"Aww, dad, I think enough time has passed that you can call her if you wanted to. Just as a friend."

Mikhalis looked at her a little sadly.

"But we're not just friends, my darling. She was my love."

Siana felt tears prick at her eyes. She could feel the weight of regret behind her father's words, and his voice sounded tired and regretful. She watched him as he took a deep breath and let out a sigh. She could see his statement put him on the verge of tears too, and she took his hand lightly in hers.

"There is no calling her just as a friend, anymore."

"Stop it dad, don't say that. Mum isn't suffering anymore. She has had time to let it all become water under the bridge. She is happy. We're happy. Maybe distance and separation has made all the past easier to remember-"

The door opened with a whoosh and N looked out at them briefly, taking in the situation in an instant.

Leaving the door open, he turned back towards the living room, shouting over his shoulder, "Ah, there you are, come in, but please excuse us, just a little more tidying we have to do in the kitchen!"

Siana could see he was giving them a moment to compose themselves and looked up at her father to smile at him. This was a conversation for another time. She smiled at him impishly.

"That's Hakyeon for you, busy, busy, busy, being all observant and kindly."

"Yes, an annoying creature you can't help but want to spend time with," laughed her dad, sniffing a little.

"Don't I stan a great group? I mean, imagine if they were rockers."

"Hmmm, that would still be better than electro heads. Those guys are so emo."

Siana laughed, because they really had no idea what they were talking about. In better spirits, they entered the penthouse, arm in arm.

They walked into the brightly lit living area to find N and Leo standing sheepishly by the fireplace.

She smelled extinguished matches and guessed that they had tried to light the fire but failed. She and Mikhalis stood by the coffee table that was between the two sofas that had been set with plates, cutlery and glasses.

"It doesn't have an ON button," N said, deadpan. Leo nodded as Mikhalis peered into the fireplace, threw back his head and laughed.

"I think I have to introduce you to the concept of kindling," he said, pushing them aside gently to reach into the pile of firewood that was sitting stacked along the length of wall on one side of the fireplace. There, was a neatly folded old newspaper that had fallen to the side between the wood pieces.

N and Leo turned and gave their full attention to Mikhalis as he pulled out a leaf of it and folded the remaining paper up again. Then he peered at the firewood and pulled tiny branches and dried leaves off them where he could find any.

"These are tree trunks in here," he said, pulling the two large logs that they had placed on the metal plate that formed the base of the fireplace out towards the side. He grabbed a couple of thinner logs with loose bark on them, and a sturdier, smoother one, setting them up so that the logs rested against each other and allowed air to circulate between them.

With a tiny handful of twigs and leaves, he arranged them into a little pile under and between the logs and tore up half of the paper, scrunching them up into loose rolls. He lit one and held it under the kindling, watching for the twigs to take and start crackling. Before that paper burnt out, he had lit the other to keep it going. When he needed to, he blew on the dwindling flame to give it a boost. He looked up at the mantelpiece where there was a long wooden carved bowl filled with dried old pinecones, and took a couple to drop onto the little pile. They crackled instantly.

"Oh. We thought those were for decoration," said N, surprised. He and Leo giggled.

"I believe in multifunctional items," smiled Mikhalis.

Before long the logs had caught fire and were beginning to generate heat.

The boys turned to find Siana had made herself comfortable on one of the sofas, had rested her head on one of the arms and gone to sleep.

"She's multitasking on our behalf," joked Mikhalis, sitting on the sofa opposite her, gesturing to the boys to sit.

N could see that Leo was not sure where to sit: next to Siana on her sofa, or next to Mr Mikhalis on his. He smiled, knowing that in these situations Leo would wait to take his cue from everyone else. But N didn't indicate where he would sit, rather, left the living area to go fetch an extra chair from the dining table. As he did, the doorbell rang, and he paused to open and let Kkomae in.

"Really? Your bathrobe?" N sneered.

"I like it because it is loose and covers all the appropriate body parts," Kkomae stated indifferently as he breezed past and went to the living room. He and Mikhalis greeted each other with loud hellos as Kkomae spread his arms out. N followed after him with the chair and put it by the coffee table.

He was pleased to note Leo had perched himself on the ledge by the fireplace, the best choice out of the potential seating that he had. Good Boyfriend, he thought to himself.

"The food will be delivered soon. I got kokoretsi. I hope you like meat, fat and guts," Mikhalis said.

They all nodded happily. Someone clapped.

"Would you like a drink, Mr Mikhalis?" N asked.

"What do you have?"

"Milk, water and half a can of someone's soda," N smiled. Mikhalis laughed and got up, walking into the kitchen.

He opened the cabinets under the sink and pulled out a large plastic carafe that had a stopper in its mouth, and held it up triumphantly.

"Retsina. My brother's brew. The other carafe in there is olive oil, also my brother's first press," Mikhalis said as he looked in the cabinets for something else. Eventually he found a small vessel enough for a half-litre of liquid, which he rinsed and filled with the pinkish retsina out of the carafe. He stopped it up carefully and replaced the carafe under the sink.

Then he brought the jug over to the table.

"I store them up here as spares," he smiled. "Are you all drinking?" he asked.

Everyone nodded as N took the jug to pour out everyone's drinks. The doorbell rang and Mikhalis went to answer it. He came back with two plastic bags full of food and set it all down on the table. He sat, rubbing his hands with glee.

"You guys are going to love this!"

"Shall I get some serving plates?" Mikhalis shook his head.

"No need to involve extra plates in this transaction!" Kkomae and he chuckled gleefully as he opened the first package, a large, rounded parcel that he tore open to reveal a whole roast chicken sitting on thick cut potato chips already soggy from its juices. The smell filled the room and seemed to punch them in the gut, they all reacted so loudly to it. Immediately Kkomae sat down next to Mikhalis and N took the chair. Mikhalis gestured to Leo to sit next to the sleeping Siana. Leo walked round the sofa and perched on the end of it.

"Just be comfortable," Mikhalis said as he placed the chicken in the centre of the table and made a little nest under it with its wrappings. Next, he pulled out a smaller, log-shaped parcel which he opened carefully to reveal messy slices of kokoretsi, which was lamb guts wrapped around seasoned lamb innards and roasted on a spit. The outside of the kokoretsi was a deep caramelised crispy brown, while the insides were creamy and fatty.

Mikhalis looked around and felt vindicated by the boys' reactions. If they weren't staring at it lovingly they were licking their lips or gasping with delight.

"It's heavy, which is why we need the salad and the retsina," Mikhalis declared, opening the last two plastic takeaway containers which were a raw cabbage and carrot salad, sliced paper thin and dressed simply with olive oil, salt and lemon juice, and a greek salad with a large slab of feta cheese sprinkled heavily with dried oregano on top.

Siana sat up suddenly, inhaling deeply. She smiled sleepily in the general direction of the food, then pushed her hair out of her face.

"Kokoretsi!" she sighed as she undid her hair to re-tie it neatly.

"Retsina?" Mikhalis asked.

"No, I have class tomorrow morning, early." She realised Leo was sitting next to her and smiled at him warmly.

"Here you go," Mikhalis gave her a plate stacked with chicken, chips and a pile of kokoretsi. "Start."

N and Kkomae had also piled up plates already, whilst Leo was picking food directly from the table. N looked at him sideways as Leo shoved a slice of crumbling kokoretsi in his mouth. He was about to comment on his manners, but when Leo's eyes fluttered closed when the hot juices from the meat filled his mouth as he chewed, N forgot his lecture and turned to his own food, inhaling its aroma deeply before ploughing in.

Soon, the room was quiet with the sound of munching, slurping and groaning with delight. Siana smiled at her dad as he chewed, knowing he loved this sort of company, just food and friends and the comfort of home.

Mikhalis asked Kkomae how they had come to choose his place to stay.

"The size and the view," Kkomae said, through a mouthful of chicken.

Siana smiled. She knew most older buildings didn't have that sort of size available, but her grandfather had insisted on the whole floor for a penthouse when he built the building in the 70s. His plan was for the entire family to feel they had the freedom to stay with them. Her uncle and aunt both ended up with different parts of their parents' estate after their passing, and were quite happy to leave the building and its tenants to her father.

Up until ten years ago they had had an uninterrupted view of the Corinthian straits but development had eventually blocked part of it. Still, the penthouse had a good view over most of Itea from almost all sides, being one of the taller buildings in the area.

Because Greece was vulnerable to earthquakes, most buildings were built low to the ground. However her grandfather had prepared foundations strong enough for a taller building than the four storeys he built, and she had always felt safe whenever the building began to shiver and shake during the few earthquakes she had experienced whilst in Greece.

Her father, N and Kkomae were leading the conversation, whilst she and Leo sat apart on the sofa, highly aware of one another, but also aware of the others.  
Since she had awakened, she had felt a little self-conscious, having accidentally fallen asleep and woken up dishevelled and a little disoriented. She had thought she was home already and sleeping in her bed. So when she smelled the food and opened her eyes, it took her a moment to remember where she was.

When Leo had come to sit by her, she could tell he was self-conscious too, by the way he sat so upright. Was he simply being respectful of her father? If so, he could still be a little more relaxed, after all, Kkomae was lounging back against the sofa in his bathrobe, resting his plate on his chest as he mopped up the juices on his plate with leftover chips. And N was sitting crosslegged like an elegant yogi as he sipped on the retsina.

Everyone else was comfortable except Leo.

She looked directly at him, smiling. He turned his head to look at her seriously, as if to politely listen to anything she was about to say.

She bit on a chip and chewed as she smiled at him more, waiting for him to respond, but no dice. He turned back to look at the table, his own plate empty. She glanced over at her father, and could see he was paying no attention to Leo as he chuckled and chatted with Kkomae.

She realised Leo needed a little help to feel comfortable, otherwise he would get a cramp from sitting so stiffly.

She gathered up her blanket around her and shuffled closer to him until her leg was against his leg, and her body could lean into him. She could feel him react with surprise, but she cuddled closer.

"It's cold," she said quietly, smiling up at him.

"You're closer to the fire than I am," he said, a little alarmed by her proximity. She could feel his body stiffen even as she was trying to get comfortable against him.

"Hmm, it just doesn't make any sense," she kept looking at him with her smile. She was hoping that he would get that the sort of propriety he was trying to show her father was not necessary, since she had already had her conversation with him before they arrived, and made sure that he was apprised of their situation.

She could see he was not relaxing, even though it was already obvious through her behaviour to anyone who was watching. She looked at the others. Nobody had even noticed their sudden proximity, which was probably why Leo seemed to be looking for a way to disengage from her before someone did.

"Dad, I took Hongbin and Leo to get coffee the other day, did I tell you? We saw Kyria Despina," she said across the table to her father.

Leo froze.

N and Kkomae looked up, surprised to see Siana leaning on Leo. They immediately looked at Mr Mikhalis to gauge his reaction.

"Really? Did you show them how to make it?" Mikhalis answered, unperturbed by the sight of Siana cuddling up to Leo on the sofa.

"Yes, but I don't know if they tried it on their own," she said as she turned to Leo in questioning. "Did you?"

Leo opened his mouth to talk, but when Mikhalis turned to him to listen to his answer, he seemed to lose his voice suddenly.

N piped up, "Yes he did, and he did a pretty good job too." Leo looked at N with a sort of deadness in his eyes - or was that desperation? N smiled a tight-lipped smile and looked back at Siana to avoid Leo's glance.

Siana lifted her plate and asked for more kokoretsi, which N obligingly placed on it for her.

"Ah, a coffee after dinner would be just nice!" Mikhalis said. She saw N glance at Leo in a moment of alarm and realised that he had fibbed to make Leo look good. Leo shifted uncomfortably.

She saw an opportunity and took it.

"I'll help you make it," she said to him, as she settled back against him to eat her food.

It was chewy, crunchy, salty and juicy, and she was enjoying it so much she forgot about Leo for a moment as she closed her eyes and let the juices run down the back of her throat.

"Mmm, it's delicious!" she said, licking her fingers and smacking her lips. She finished, and leaned forward to gather up a few things to take with her to the kitchen.

N helped her make a little pile of crockery and cutlery, and when she stood up, her blanket fell off her shoulders onto the sofa. She made sure she wouldn't trip over Leo as she shuffled between him and the table to get into the kitchen, where she put everything into the sink. Behind her, she heard someone follow to help.

She put the kettle on to boil some water for the greasy plates, and gathered up the mini gas stove and the coffee and utensils. She turned to see it was Leo beside her, who was standing in front of the sink, readying to wash up. She went and stood right next to him and watched him pulling up his sleeves and picking up the dish soap to pour a little over the sponge. She wanted to say something, but he kept moving, intent on completing his task.

The bottle was almost empty, and it made a loud farting noise as he tried to squeeze out the soap.

He looked down at her with such an expression of woe that she laughed. It seemed the night couldn't get any worse for him.

He squeezed the bottle again, and it farted again.

She giggled as he dropped both items into the sink in disgust and put his hands on the edge of it, hanging his head. She couldn't help it, she put her arms around his waist and laughed into his sleeve. They could hear the others making comments and laughing at the noise.

She stopped laughing, getting serious.

"It's alright, everyone farts," she whispered.

He cracked up, his shoulders shaking, and turned his lowered head towards her, til their breaths mingled as they giggled. She kissed his cheek suddenly, and could see him sobering up again with that show of affection.

"Tonight you're very shy, suddenly," she said to him.

"We're not alone," he whispered, trying to stand upright. She wouldn't let go.

"Can't you tell my dad is okay about it? We're both adults. Anyway, he's already seen worse," she smiled. Leo looked alarmed.

"Worse?"

"He saw us in a compromising position in the car when we arrived earlier." She looked at him with an impish smile. She could see him growing more worried.

"Hey, we were asleep." She realised that she had been the one doing the compromising, whilst Leo had simply been sleeping in a minding-his-own-business kind of way.

"Anyway, what matters is that he is totally fine. You can relax, he's very Greek about it all."

"What does that mean?"

"It means, he's happy for us," she said, smiling cheerily. Leo watched her for a moment, and looked like he decided to believe her. He seemed to relax, relieved, and she could feel the tension in his body sliding away.

He hung his head, smiling to himself as he shook it slowly.

"Is it so hard to believe?" she asked him gently.

"No, just... unexpected."

"Why? Did you think he would be against the idea?"

Leo remembered the talk he had had with MIkhalis. He was certain now, that Mikhalis had been aware of their gravitation towards each other, even then.

"No, I just didn't think he would be okay with an open display of affection," he stated simply.

"Well, even conservative Greeks are okay with open displays of affection," she said.

The kettle was boiling, so she let him go to bring it over to the sink.

"Why don't you let me do this. You can make the coffee," she said as she made him move away.

"You know I can't do it," he muttered, prodding the coffee pot with his finger.

"I will show you," Mikhalis said, appearing in the kitchen. Leo seemed to snap to attention, but Mikhalis just waved at him as he walked up to the counter.

"I taught Siana how to make this coffee. Her mum never got the hang of it," he said, patting her on the shoulder. She nodded as she stopped the sinkhole and partly filled the sink with cold water, then poured hot water in and emptied the dish soap into it til it was sudsy. As she listened to her father chitchatting, she soaped up the glasses first, then cutlery and then the dishes, and quickly rinsed everything off and set them in the dish rack to drip dry.

Leo was concentrating, his hand on the coffee pot handle as it bubbled on the tiny gas stove. He nodded as MIkhalis gave him instructions on measurements and then the timing of the boiling. Just as the coffee krema began to rise in the pot, Mikhalis calmly instructed him to take the pot off the stove, and then, just as Siana had explained that day, made him pour just a drop into each cup before going back to fill them up properly.

Mikhalis stood between Siana and Leo as they watched Leo fill the last cup. He put his arms around both of them, and looked up at Leo warmly.

"I'm happy to see you both having fun. Be wise, and enjoy it while you can," he said jovially, patting them both before turning to go back to the living room.

Siana watched Leo's expression. She wasn't sure what exactly her father had meant by "while you can". He could be presuming that once Leo left, their relationship would come to an end, or, he could mean something more general along the lines of "enjoy it while you're young". She couldn't tell, but knew that it was an issue that would keep coming up for them both, since everyone knew that their time together in Greece was limited. What everyone else didn't know was that Leo had insisted that they look beyond that time - and she had agreed.

**

Hongbin felt the sudden welcome chill of mountain air as he opened the door and left the club, Panos close behind him. Although he had enjoyed being out and with guys who were great fun, he was glad to be outside and wanted to have some time to wind down before they returned home.

The ride up with Panos had been quiet but comfortable, as they had fallen into an easy companionship during the last week from spending so much time together.

However, Hongbin's mind was preoccupied, during the ride and during the clubbing.

Much as he had been rooting for Leo Hyung and hoping that he would follow through on whatever attraction he had obviously had for Siana from the start, he couldn't help thinking about Siana's welfare.

Even though Panos had often spoken of Siana's toughness and independence, Hongbin couldn't help feeling that Panos was worried too. As her cousin, he would be aware of Siana's vulnerabilities, which, besides Hongbin's own concerns from afar, could lay her open to attack. Hongbin could see Panos was keeping those concerns to himself - and it spoke of a deep and intimate knowledge of her that only these close cousins could have, which he didn't want to share with relative strangers, no matter how friendly they had become.

Hongbin could take a guess though, from any number of presumptions. Siana was a single child, she came from a broken marriage, and lived her life between two homes. She was striking out pretty much on her own at a young age, but even with the support of loving parents, was alone in her endeavours. He worried how a failed relationship in this particular situation would affect her - and by particular he meant a celebrity for whom she had obviously carried a torch for a long time before they had even met. What expectations would she have? Was she going into this realistically? Did she have much experience with men? Hongbin couldn't help thinking that she was going into this relationship with barely anything on her side.

Also, this was Leo Hyung, whose commitment to complication seemed inevitable.

Panos gestured to a tiny fastfood bar that served hot sandwiches and drinks. They walked in and Hongbin let Panos order two baguettes, stuffed with lamb from the gyros and slathered an eggplant and tomato concoction before it was pressed flat on a griddle. They took a seat at the tiny bar that ran along the length of the wall and the front window, facing the street.

Hongbin took a moment to text the others and found they were ready to leave the club and have some food too.

"Let's eat!" Panos said, unwrapping his sandwich and biting the top of it with relish. Hongbin took a bite of the compressed bread and was pleased with how neatly the sandwich could be consumed, despite its messy contents.

"So what do you think about this development with Siana?" Hongbin asked out of the corner of his stuffed mouth.

Panos chewed thoughtfully, pausing to take a sip of soda and swallow his mouthful. They watched as Ken, Ravi and Min Seok appeared from the alley and dawdled up towards their eatery. Hongbin was happy that Ravi and Ken had had some fun, because other than the dance studio, they rarely had the occasion to enjoy music and dancing without restraint. The club had been quite full and dark and nobody had even an inkling htat they were tourists. Or at least, it was the sort of crowd that didn't care much who they were.

The boys bustled in, interrupting Panos' train of thought by peering over their shoulders at their sandwiches, then going up to the counter to look into the display fridge which held all the possible fillings and condiments that they could want.

"Do they have kimchi?" joked Ken out loud.

To their surprise, the stout little man behind the counter pulled out a commercial tub of kimchi from a corner of the fridge and dropped it on the counter matter-of-factly.

The boys were so surprised that Panos stopped trying to answer Hongbin, and asked the man how he came to have kimchi.

"You forgot we have those Koreans here for weeks when they were shooting? My business is booming because of them. They used to come clubbing around here after their work. Nice guys."

"Do many Korean tourists come here and ask for kimchi?" Panos asked, intrigued.

The man shrugged. "More non-Koreans want it than Koreans."

Panos laughed and explained to the boys why the man had a stock of kimchi. The boys were impressed and clapped dutifully in awe.

As the others made a careful selection for their post-clubbing fare, Panos turned back to pick up his sandwich and continue his conversation with Hongbin.

"Until this moment, I have been thinking that I am happy for Siana. But you have raised the issue twice and it makes me think twice, my friend," he said, as he took another bite out of his sandwich.

Hongbin nodded. "About what? About Leo's commitment? About Siana's well-being?"

Panos looked at Hongbin, resting an elbow on the bar.

"About you."

Hongbin was taken aback. He did not expect that.

"Are you suspicious of your friend? Do you have doubts about his integrity? Because not so long ago I thought you were very happy about the idea."

"I-I am happy, but I have always had my doubts - for Siana's sake." Hongbin stuttered. He was unused to being unsure of even what he felt or thought. Panos' words had thrown him for a loop.

"Ah, this is something that also makes me think twice. Are you concerned for Siana the way I am concerned for Siana? Or do you have some other more private reason to be concerned for her?" Panos looked at him shrewdly, before cosking an eyebrow. Hongbin felt himself hold his breath. What was Panos trying to say all of a sudden? He stared back in surprise as Panos gazed at him.

Then Panos waggled his eyebrows.

"Just playing with you, Hongbin!" he laughed, slapping Hongbin on the shoulder.

Hongbin felt the blood drain out of his face.

Panos resumed eating. "But I do wonder why you bring it up."

"Bring what up?" Asked Ken, suddenly leaning forward onto Hongbin from behind. Hongbin didn't mind physical proximity with Ken, but tonight for some reason, he didn't particularly feel like being spooned so heartily at that exact moment. He shrugged him off irritatedly, catching Panos' eye as he did so.  
Panos nodded thoughtfully as if to confirm his theories.

"Don't look at me like that," Hongbin said to him as Ken took a seat beside him.

"Like what?" asked Ravi, who took the seat next to Panos. Min Seok settled near Ken, and everyone leaned in to listen properly.

Hongbin suddenly stood up, feeling a little cornered, making Panos laugh and pull him back down.

"Sorry, man, I was just having a little fun! Come, sit down, finish eating."

"Ah, I cannot joke about things like this, it makes me uncomfortable," Hongbin said with a strained smile. He couldn't look at anyone, which was strange to him. What did he have to feel guilty for anyway?

"About WHAT?!" shrieked Ken, albeit quietly. Ravi laughed.

Panos looked at Hongbin to see if he could speak to the boys. Hongbin shook his head, picking up his sandwich.

"Hongbin is concerned about Siana- " Panos began.

"And Leo," interjected Hongbin.

"And wonders how things will turn out for my pretty cousin." Panos finished.

"And Leo," Hongbin added, hopelessly.

"Really? Don't you think they are good together?" Ravi asked Hongbin. Before Hongbin could answer, Panos interjected.

"He worries about whether Siana will come out unscathed."

Ravi nodded. "I have had those thoughts too. Not to say I don't trust Siana-ssi, but I was worried that Leo Hyung was falling too hard. We had a talk about it, actually."

Hongbin was surprised to hear Ravi say that, having thought that he was the only one besides N who was privy to Leo's hidden attraction for Siana.

"In the end, I think it would be harder for them to try to stay apart than to just see where this goes." Ravi said through a couple of mouthfuls of food.

"Yes, I agree," said Panos. Ken nodded thoughtfully as he ate.

Hongbin finished his sandwich and scrunched up the wrapper into a neat little ball. Something still bothered him, and he realised after hearing the boys talking about seeing where things would lead, that they had not given thought to the fact that Leo would want more than a holiday romance. In fact, Hongbin was pretty sure that Leo had already put it out there to Siana that he would want full commitment - and she may have agreed to that.

Though he just wasn't sure now, after Panos' ribbing, whether he himself was concerned for her because he would have been no matter who she was, or if it was because it was Siana. She was a lovely girl after all, who seemed to have captured everyone's interest somehow. Hongbin felt he had gotten quite close to Siana, even though their time spent together had been limited. She had trusted him enough to do that, and he felt he was in a position to protect her. Although he didn't like assuming the worst of others' behaviour, he was ready to be there for her if Hyung didn't treat her well.

Hongbin suddenly felt that his turn of thoughts were becoming inappropriate, and that he needed to steer himself away from them.

Of course he was concerned for her because he would be for any girl who ended up being in this position with any of them - but in particular because in these circumstances, the decision about the nature of their relationship (to be temporary or not) had to be made sooner or later.

He just had a hunch that the decision had been made, and he felt strangely uncomfortable that he couldn't do much about it.

He felt his phone buzzing in his pocket, and pulled it out to find N was trying to video chat with him. He answered, holding up the phone to show he was with company. Ken leaned in to look too.

"Hi guys!" N's cheery phone voice echoed against the glass window.

"Annyeong, Hyung," said Ken. Hongbin could see N was at home and that they had built a fire.

"You lit the fire without us?" Ken asked.

"No, Mr. Mikhalis did," said N as he turned with the camera to show that, at the sofa, Mikhalis and Kkomae were chatting over their drinks.

Hongbin was startled to catch Leo and Siana sitting together on the other sofa, Leo leaning back against the chair arm, and Siana leaning back against him, wrapped in a blanket. Did they feel so comfortable they could be so intimate in front of Siana's father? Hongbin then realised that they had been given the stamp of approval from her dad. That was very quick.

It was a short glimpse as N passed them to stop on Mr Mikhalis, which seemed to stab at him inside. Hongbin drew a deep breath, trying to keep his hand steady.

"I hope you guys had a good time because you missed the best food yet," N said conversationally. He continued.

"We saved you some to taste but I want to know if you will be back soon because we're all tired here. You done? Or you still going?"

"We're just eating then we'll be on our way, Hyung," said Ravi.

"We have to come back here together, Hyung, you will like it a lot. Siana must come too! We can leave Appa behind if he doesn't want to dance!" shouted Ken nice and loud into the phone.

N laughed, although Hongbin realised Leo hadn't even reacted to their jibes. N looked over at Leo, then back at the camera.

"Leo is busy right now, but I am sure if Siana-ssi goes dancing with you lot, he will be going too," N smiled. Hongbin nodded, feeling unsettled.

They said their goodbyes and hung up. As he put his phone away in his jacket pocket, he caught Panos watching him again.

**

Siana had her breakfast on the balcony. The sun was already up and she had an hour to go before the first batch of kids would arrive for their dance lesson. She leaned back on her chair and put her legs up on the balcony rails as she ate her soggy cereal and watched the sunlight slowly warm up the town.

She was already dressed in ballet tights and leotard under her jacket and had her hair tied up tight in a bun. Although the classes were very casual, the little girls loved all things to do with ballet, so Siana dressed as a proper ballerina, prim and neat and tidy, as an example to them. She would spend a bit of time going through ballet etiquette and things like posture and deportment - introducing the culture of the ballet dancer along with the dance.

She munched on her cereal thoughtfully.

Much as she had been looking forward to starting the classes with the kids, she was looking forward to seeing Leo later in the day. She felt light, as if a long, long wait was finally over. Although there was a giddying flurry of nerves played in her belly, it was from anticipation rather than anxiety.

She was grateful that her father seemed to be very happy for her, and even liked Leo. It seemed so easy, despite all all the odds that she had thought were against them.

She felt like they had passed through an important crossroad, and now the road ahead was an open highway. She knew there was going to be a time where they would have to stop and take stock, but that was in the future. All she wanted to do now was to take that heady drive with Leo, and see what the open road would bring them.

She finished and got up to wash her bowl in the kitchen. Grabbing a bottle of water, she picked up her ballet shoes, slipped on her sneakers, then grabbed her phone and keys and left the house.

Downstairs, she opened up the main entry door and then the small door by the lift so that parents could drop their children off at the front instead of walking around through the back yard. In the studio, she turned on a portable heater and checked the playlist on her phone.

She still had some time to go. Although she didn't really need to warm up to conduct these classes, she decided there was enough time for her to fit in some stretching and perhaps some practise for herself.

She lay on the floor and focused on long, deep stretches that worked on her turnout and her flexibility in her legs and her back. She felt like a cat, the stretches rippling through her body as it began to wake up from a long night of rest. She got up off the floor did some centre exercises, pliés, pirouettes and jumps, focusing more on her technique and strength and finally feeling like her body was awake and primed for physical activity.

She heard the voices of the first bunch of kids as they came in, and when they saw her in the room, they came squealing own the rest of the stairs to rush to her and give her a hug, followed by a couple of bedraggled mothers bearing bags, bottles and pink ballet shoes.

The quiet was gone as the girls readied themselves for their class while Siana chatted quickly with the mothers. Some of the kids had siblings who would do the next class, and so Siana would be doing double duty both teaching and babysitting the extra children as they sat and waited for their turn.

Siana didn't mind at all, since she realised that effectively, she was offering a creche service. The parents were grateful for some activity that would keep the kids preoccupied for a while and gave them time for their church or personal activities on a sunday morning. Sooner or later, it had paid off for Siana as many mums began asking if she would do classes for adults too. Eventually, she would see herself getting busier and busier during weeknights, and by the end of her stay, would amass a tidy sum for efforts.

However, that was the last thing on Siana's mind. She felt preoccupied as she began the warm ups with the kids after the mums had gone. Although she conducted the class just the same, in the back of her mind she wondered what Leo would think if he was to see her teaching kids. Did he like being with kids? Would her class like him if he were to appear suddenly and interact with them?

Her mind was constantly ruminating, running through similar thoughts for the entire duration of her two hours. By the time the last parent arrived to pick up their kid, she was feeling mentally tired and emotionally a little drained. Although she had been active the whole morning, she had not really done anything physical, and could feel that familiar feeling of restlessness in her muscles. She thought she could go through some routines while she was in the studio, but felt constrained by the space.

She wanted to be outside, in the warm sun and cool air, and to feel her heart pumping and her muscles working. She locked up quickly, checking the time. It was not yet 11 so she figured she had time to do something before she was to meet with Leo later.

She left her shoes in the studio and locked up, walking out the front door into the brilliant morning sunshine and unlocking the yard door to retrieve her old bike.

Hefting it onto the street, she hopped on and pedalled towards town.

The town, though quiet, would soon be bustling with sunday traffic as the church crowd would file out of the morning service and out into the various cafes and eateries that were open and ready to serve.

She pedalled as fast as she could on her clunker of a bike, working up a sweat and making her heart pump furiously as she kept her pace up all along the length of the main street near the waterfront. As she approached the central road leading towards the town centre and main church, she slowed to take the turn carefully. As she pedalled towards the church, she decided on a whim to stop at the half court near the childrens' playground. She knew the playground would be filled with families taking their kids out in the lovely weather later, and hoped that she could get a few minutes there while it was still quiet.

As she hopped off the bike, she saw that her cousin Panos was already there on the court, dribbling the ball to lay it up for a score.

"Yeiasou Pano!" she said in Greek.

"Kalimera, koukla," he replied as he took a shot and missed. She caught the ball before it bounced away and threw it back to him.

"How was last night? Have fun with your new playmates?"

"We had a lot of fun. Music was good, dancing was good, food was good." He looked at her pointedly. "Conversation was good too."

"Really? So you're finally making real friends?" Siana wasn't going to take the bait by asking what they talked about. She knew Panos was about to drop some heavy teasing.

He laughed, taking another shot and missing.

"Not enough sleep, cousin?" she asked as she caught it again and bounced it to him.

"Just thinking about all the things I heard last night. Anything you would like to tell me, cousin?"

"You're the biggest gossip in town, maybe you should tell me!"

Panos dribbled lazily around the court, smiling to himself.

"Well, I know all about you and Leo, could see it happening from that night out. But what is really interesting is how much my new friends are invested in your happiness," he said.

"MY happiness?" Siana was surprised by Panos' observation.

"Yes. They are quite protective of you. I can't think why," he added slyly. She rolled her eyes.

"It must be my charming personality," she joked, her lip curled.

"Well, consider them all well and truly charmed. Some more than others," he added, as he took another shot. He scored.

They heard a whoop from behind them, and both turned to see Ken and Hongbin approaching from the playground. They were smiling at Panos, but only noticed Siana was there after they walked forward and she came into their view.

Ken gasped with joy and ran up to her to give her a huge bear hug, basically putting her head into a headlock. She wriggled out of it, pushing him away and reaching up to fix her mussed up hair.

Panos noticed Hongbin coming up to him quietly, patting him in the back in greeting.

"Nice to see you too, Ken Oppa," she smiled a fake sweet smile, pulling her hair elastic out to re-tie her hair. Ken spied the red bobbles and pointed to it, turning to Panos with a beaming smile, chest out.

"My Hyung gave her that, isn't it pretty? She's ours now!"

Siana kicked him before she could stop herself. She tied it up and unzipped her jacket to take it off.

"It will take more than that to make her all ours," Hongbin admonished.

Ken and Panos looked at him in surprise, which made him go red.

"I-I mean-"

"We know what you meant," Ken said, suddenly serious. "Hyung's gift is too small, is that it?"

"My cousin can't be bought for cheap, is that what you meant?" Panos chipped in.

"Will you all shut up?" Siana huffed, throwing her jacket off to the side. "It's pretty and it's meaningful."

Ken and Panos clutched their hearts, pretending to tear up. Hongbin was too flustered not to explain himself.

"I meant she can't be bought, that's what I meant, and not for all of us, of course not, I mean, that would be..." Panos looked at Hongbin smugly.

"That would be ridiculous," Hongbin finished, averting his eyes. Siana hugged his arm all of a sudden and looked up at him,

"Thank you, Hongbin," she said, warmly.

Then she turned to Panos with a steely expression and said, "Let's play ball!"

**

Siana was just feeling like she was getting into the morning's activity when Panos said he was hungry and was going to grab a bite to eat.

"What? We just got here!" Siana said, checking her watch.

"You guys just got here. I've been here since ten. I want food."

"Me too!" said Ken, his hand up high in the air. Hongbin looked at him, then at Siana.

"Umm..."

"Let's go, brother!" Panos said, high-fiving Ken and walking off the court.

Siana bounced the ball on the spot, sulking. Hongbin looked helplessly back at Ken, who scrunched up his face and held his tummy as if he was starving, then turned quickly to follow Panos.

"Are you hungry too?" Siana asked Hongbin, squinting up at him under the approaching noonday sun.

"Yes, we didn't have breakfast." Hongbin said, hoping that Siana would let him leave instead of holding him there with so much... expectation. She looked like she really wanted to continue playing and he didn't feel like he could abandon her. But... food.

"Well, you don't have to wait here with me," she said, holding the ball against her belly with her arms. She blew her cheeks out, held her breath and pouted.  
Hongbin did a double-take.

"A-are... Are you trying to be... cute?" He asked in surprise. "Stop it."

Siana let the air out of her cheeks and smiled up at him.

"Is it as irritating as I think it is?" she asked.

Hongbin laughed. "Almost as irritating as being asked to do it."

"Oh really? You guys don't live for doing that on camera? Huh. And I always thought you were okay with it," she said sarcastically.

"No. Not okay. Ken is okay. And Hyuk will do it as a joke. But the rest of us hate it."

"I think Ken will do it til he's 80."

"Yes, and that will be his punishment to everyone for making him do it in the first place."

Siana laughed.

"So you're all bitter about it then? Even Ken?"

Hongbin nodded, smiling. Siana giggled, her initial disappointment at having to stop, fading.

"You okay to just shoot some hoops? I'll buy you a snack!" she said, her eyes shining.

Hongbin laughed, "Gosh, you're so cheap. Okay!"

"Awww, just for me? You're so kind!" Siana turned and lopped the ball straight into the hoop. Hongbin's jaw dropped open. She whooped, happy with her easy score, and ran to retrieve the ball.

"I see we have started," Hongbin said, drily.

"One Nil to Siana," she snickered.

Hongbin watched her turn excitedly to come back to shoot again as he walked out of the way.

"But if I faint from hunger I expect you will carry me home out of the goodness of your heart."

Siana laughed, pausing to put her hand on her heart and making an oath.

"If I have to tie your leg to my bike and drag you home, I'll do it Hongbin-ssi!"

It was Hongbin's turn to laugh now, and he watched her concentrate as she took another shot. Her clear brown eyes took on a serious cast as she bent her knees before shooting. He could see a little wrinkle at the top of her nose. She shot, and the ball ran around the rim of the hoop before falling out to the side. Hongbin caught it before it bounced and went to take her spot as she moved out of the way.

He dribbled the ball on the spot for a few seconds, then took a shot, getting it in. Siana sent the ball back to him and he immediately put it back in the hoop. She caught it and sent it back to him again.

He looked at the hoop, shut his eyes and shot again, getting it in.

He smiled and opened his eyes, only to see Siana rolling her eyes at him as she threw the ball into his arms, hard.

"I didn't expect you to be such a show off!"

Hongbin looked at her pityingly. "I'm a kpop idol, what are you talking about?"

Siana laughed. "Okay so since it looks like I won't get to play if we do it this way, how about one on one? At least I can run around and play instead of being the designated ball retriever!"

"But Siana-ssi, I am so hungry and weak," Hongbin whined.

"First to three, it won't be long!" Siana smiled.

"If we stop this now, I have earned my snack. What do I get for playing longer?"

Siana huffed. "Oh, it's like that then?"

Hongbin nodded.

"What are you thinking?"

"Lamb, chicken, seafood, ice cream," Hongbin twirled the ball on his finger. She tried to snatch the ball from him, but he just transferred it, still spinning to his other hand.

"If they have lamb, chicken and seafood ice cream, I'll buy you one," she huffed, trying again. Hongbin laughed.

"If you stay here, I'll catch up with Ken and Panos then get Ken Hyung to come back and play with you," he threatened amicably.

"Ken obviously doesn't have a loyal bone in his body."

Hongbin caught the ball and looked down at her, one dimple showing with a lopsided smile.

"You mean, to you? Are you implying that I am loyal because I stayed to play even though my hunger is like a pit in my stomach?" He was teasing, but he saw Siana sober up a little at his words.

"No, I meant loyal to you, look how he scrambled out of here as soon as he could. I mean-" she seemed distracted by another train of thought. "Are you really that hungry? I thought you just didn't really feel like playing for too long. If it's that bad, we can stop, honestly."

Hongbin nodded, holding the ball towards Siana with finality.

"Yes, I am that hungry, Siana-ssi. I would like to eat, and soon. But we can play one on one. First to three."

Without warning, he bounced the ball around her, caught up with it and laid it up for a smooth shot. He caught the ball as it bounced and turned to look at her triumphantly.

Hongbin was surprised to see Siana had stopped to look at him, worried.

"What is it?"

"You're really that hungry? We should stop, then," she said, hesitant.

"But we have started now. That's One Nil. Hongbin. That's Lee Hongbin," he said, eager enough to see who would win that his hunger was still under control.  
But Siana walked slowly towards him, her eyes large pools of gentle concern.

Hongbin felt his breath catch in his throat. She looked like she was going to put her arms around him. He put his free hand up between them.

"I'm okay, reall-" Hongbin didn't finish as Siana tapped the ball out of his light hold, bounced it on a quick turn and shot a clean goal, right over his head, as he watched her do it. They were so close the hoop that the ball seemed to bounce right back into her hands.

He gaped at her as she bit back her smug smile and tried not to lift her chin in satisfaction.

"I can't believe you-"

"Believe it, Hongbin-ssi," Siana turned and dribbled lazily towards the three-point line, not even looking at him, which made his blood rise. She turned suddenly and saw his expression.

"Oh, you don't like that? You can give it, but you can't take it, is that how it is? Ooo Hongbin-ssi, your secret's out!"

Her words seemed to trigger his reaction. Hongbin sprang into action, surging forward to try to take her by surprise, but she sidestepped him elegantly, pivoting once to end up outside the three point line. With a neat jump, she sent the ball through the hoop.

"Siana 2. Hongbin- oh, sorry! LEE Hongbin. One."

Siana's eyes sparkled merrily, naughtily as she smiled at him. Hongbin didn't know if he wanted to laugh or shout in frustration. She had tricked him!  
He felt raw from the humiliation of being tricked by someone whom he knew was not as good a player as he was - but at the same time was enjoying her insolence. Her subtle teasing. He liked the feeling that she had gotten the better of him.

He heard her words repeat in his mind: "You can give it, but you can't take it."

She was right. He had started the cheating streak by jumping the gun without fair warning.

She was also right about something else. Hongbin felt that she had put her finger on something that others rarely realised about him.

He was an observer, a critic, an advisor. He often seemed to fly under the radar, not quite steering the ship, but always influencing, always commenting, always having his finger on the pulse.

And, much like his little secret-keeping from Leo earlier that week, he often played his cards close to his chest with a sense of guilt - because he always felt that he knew more than people assumed he did, and that he was not as forthcoming and straightforward about what it as they thought.

When he had waited before revealing to Leo that Panos was Siana's cousin, he had consciously prolonged Leo's mistaken presumption. In the end it was harmless, but the guilt he felt stemmed from the idea that maybe he was playing around with someone else's emotions rather than just having a bit of fun.  
And Siana's words hit home.

Although he felt that his intentions were not bad, his actions could be called secretive, manipulative. He could certainly give it, but he wasn't sure that he could take it if someone were to be like that to him.

He realised that Siana, besides being kind and cheerful, was very shrewd, and seemed to see right through him.

It was at that moment that Hongbin felt he understood what it was about Siana that made everyone fall in love with her.

Although he had gotten along well with her, he had only been playing the role of a supportive bystander to her.

Now, their interaction was truly one on one - and he felt that her character arsenal was full, comprehensive and deadly.

If anyone ever put themselves in her sights, they would be enraptured, captured, conquered - and not by her design, but because it was inevitable.

He shook himself out of his distraction enough to go after the ball, not realising that she had fallen directly behind him, her step light and silent.

He bounced the ball, suddenly speeding up his footwork and moving lightly around. He then realised that she was covering him when he felt the light touch of her hand on his back as she tried to maintain proper distance, using her hand to gauge his next move.

He had been in many kinds of embraces before, on screen and on stage, but this kind of proximity was a dance that he realised held too much excitement for him. He tried to move away, lunging and pivoting as he expertly handled the ball, but she kept up with him. She displayed skill and some intuition, seeming to predict his every move, such that he felt cornered under the hoop, unable to get a clear shot.

With great effort, he twisted away, using his momentary break away from her to loop the ball from under the basket with one arm, up against the backboard. The ball seemed to slowly, lazily rise up to hit the corner of the box on the board, and fall gently into the hoop.

At last he had found that opening to even up the odds.

They were now breathing heavily from exertion and he knew that he was more tired than she was. He reached for the ball as it fell from the hoop but her hand shot out to swipe it towards the centre.

He groaned, turning to go after it as she did.

She reached it first before it bounced away, and sprang up suddenly, turning midair to launch an attempt to score.

He couldn't stop completely, but sprang up as well to try to block the shot. He missed.

He didn't have to look back to see if she made it - he heard the ball go through the basket.

She turned back, triumphant, as he straightened up and turned around.

She seemed inordinately close, and he could see a drop of sweat run from in front of her ear down her neck and into the neckline of her sweat shirt. He could see the strap of the leotard she was wearing under her shirt, which was hanging off to one side on her shoulder.

She looked up at him, beaming impishly.

Hongbin stared down at her, trying to control his breathing with longer breaths, his eyes taking in the glow he could see in her face.

He felt a sort of gentle anguish as he took in her pretty, rosy complexion. Anguish because he understood what he had to do - for her sake, and for Leo's sake.  
He knew that if he didn't take himself out of the way, he too would be enraptured. Captured.

And for the first time in a long time, he wanted to be caught.

**

Siana stowed the ball under one of the park benches, securing it with a bungee rope and small net that was kept there for that purpose. It was a thing all the users of the court understood, and everyone simply trusted that the ball would be there if they wanted to use it.

She gathered up her jacket and slipped it on as she went to her bike to unhook its pedal from the kerb.

Then she and Hongbin walked towards the main road. It was past midday, and she was looking forward to seeing Leo.

She had finally gotten to work her muscles and although it was just for a short time, she felt better for it.

She looked into every eatery they passed, which were all filling up with an older church crowd in their sunday best. They were already halfway home and she still hadn't spied Ken and Panos in any of the places they passed. She supposed Panos might have taken Ken to his father's hotel, which was a little way past the apartment block.

"Do you want to stop to get a takeaway? I don't know where the others went."

Hongbin, who had been quiet all this time, checked the clock on his phone.

"I can have something at home. You have a lunch date. You should get ready," he smiled at her before looking into the next shop.

Siana felt remorse that getting what she wanted, which was that extra time on the court with a playing partner, had caused Hongbin to miss out on not only a nice lunch, but company. Now he was offering to go straight home so that she could have time to prepare for her own appointment.

They reached the building, and she put the bike back in the yard, closing and locking the gate. Hongbin stood waiting as she turned back to look at him.

"Maybe I can order something for you? If Leo doesn't mind, you could join us for lunch? I mean, not that he would mind, it's just that-"

"No. No, no no." Hongbin said, a little too fast. Siana bit her lip.

"Sorry, I just feel bad now. Can make it up to you some other time?"

Hongbin felt alarmed that he wanted to take her up on her promise. It made him uncomfortable that he was close to doing so, if only to keep the lines open with her. After all, she genuinely felt she owed him for keeping him from his friends. His stomach growled. He saw her glance at his tummy and then look up at him with such a sorry expression that he laughed, holding up both hands.

"No, seriously, don't worry about it. There is food in the house and people too. I'll be fine."

She linked her arm with his, apologetically leading him to the door. Reluctantly, he followed, not happy that her proximity, and the gentle pressure that she put on his arm, felt good.

"Oh, I feel awful and selfish. You know Hongbin, you've been so nice to me. At a time we barely knew each other, you cared for my wellbeing."

Hongbin could feel a kind of darkness closing in around him. She didn't know how close she was to melting his resolve not to put himself in her sights. Gently, he extricated himself from her grasp, looking down at her with a tightlipped smile as he let her go in through the door first.

"But I was concerned because of that incident with the vagrants. Anyone would be."

"Well, you were a great comfort, even if you felt you didn't do much. Thank you." She went forward to call for the lift. He didn't know how to respond to her, feeling that saying "you're welcome" was a little trite.

Hongbin felt awkward as they waited for the lift. He wanted to run up the stairs, but he felt he would be rude not waiting with her.

Or am I giving myself an excuse to hang around for longer? He thought. Then he knew he had to get away. He turned to her and smiled politely.

"But yes, awful and selfish." She giggled in surprise, averting her gaze because she believed it was the truth. Hongbin made himself continue, even though he wanted to watch her reaction for longer.

"Anyway, I stink, so, I will take the stairs. Have a nice lunch!" He said almost too cheerfully, leaving her before she could respond. He ran all the way up the stairs without stopping, ringing the doorbell of the penthouse twice.

He was surprised to see Ken open the door.

"Ah, Hongbinnie, we got you some food. Food for everyone, see?"

Hongbin glanced towards the living area where he could see Panos was walking from the balcony in towards the sofas and the fireplace. Hongbin was filled with a sudden dread. What if Panos was in a silly mood and decided to tease him in front of the others like he had the night before? Or what if he said something outright that, up until this morning, Hongbin could have easily laughed off as nonsense.

Now, he was beginning to believe that Panos' suspicions, or teasing rather, were true.

"I'm going to have a shower first," Hongbin said to Ken as he turned away towards the bedrooms, almost walking into Leo, who was about to leave.

"Ah! Hyung! Uh, Siana's not ready, she just got back. I mean, we just got back. We played basketball. All of us! Ken was there too, Panos too."

Hongbin scrabbled past Leo and went into his room, shutting the door behind him.

He sat on his bed and ran his fingers through his hair.

Outright denial.

That was the way he was going to deal with any suggestions that he might be interested in Siana.

They were friends. He had been there for her, as she said, and for which she seemed very grateful and shy about. And she had seemed so prettily shy about it too, he remembered how she was as they had waited for the lift just minutes ago.

Hongbin shook himself, getting up to grab his towel and stripping off his outer layers before heading towards the bathroom.

Feelings were funny, he thought as he got into the shower.

They operated without jurisdiction from the brain. From rational thought.

Well, I am a highly rational person who listens to his head all the time. I can manage my heart, he thought.

And he thought very determinedly about how he would resolve his feelings for her: he would keep his distance, keep busy and preoccupy his mind with thoughts of sightseeing, resting, and relaxing.

Hongbin bent his head, letting the hot spray seep heat into his neck and shoulders. He didn't know how long he stood there, but the hot water had begun to run out by the time he came to a very sad conclusion: he could definitely control his heart, and eventually would be able to get over this sudden infatuation that he had developed.

It would just be a very lonely and hard time that he couldn't share the burden of with anyone.

**

Siana had bathed and changed and was downstairs in less than fifteen minutes, but she found Leo already waiting on the pavement, leaning against the telephone pole near the edge of the road.

He didn't notice her, and she took the time to look at him.

He had a peacoat on that was dark blue and slightly longer than usual. The collar was large and high, obscuring his neck, and with his hands in his pockets, his overgrown hair, his down cast eyes looking past the pretty bridge of his nose, he looked like something out of a period drama.

Except that he also had ripped skinny jeans and slouchy sneakers on.

Siana pulled out her phone and snapped a picture of him unawares. He looked up when he heard the sound, and smiled a small smile, standing upright and turning to face her.

She walked up to him, feeling a little shy all of a sudden.

"I hope you don't mind, I took a picture," she said. He shook his head, his lips still a gentle smile as he peered down at her.

"Are you hungry?" he asked. She nodded, holding up her hand and jangling the keys in it.

"Dad gave me the car, I'm going to take you to Galaxidi for seafood," she said, pressing the remote to unlock the car doors. They got in, and she turned on the local radio.

She drove out onto the main road and turned up the middle of town past the church and towards the junction where the school was. There she took a left and very quickly they found themselves on a coastal highway that gave them open views of the sea to their left as they drove west along a meandering shoreline, past a huge bauxite refinery that turned the land and road a rusty red around it, and then on towards the next town, Galaxidi.

She explained to him that Galaxidi was a name taken from two words, Gala meaning milk, and xidi meaning vinegar. The name meant soured milk, or vinegar milk. She wasn't sure why it had been named that, but romantically assumed it was something to do with the crying of the womenfolk over their men who went to sea for weeks and months on end.

Because Itea was situated on one side of the huge bay it lay in, and Galaxidi on the other, the towns faced each other over water despite the fact that they were on the same mainland - they just had a huge span of shoreline between them.

They drove in comfortable silence, Leo taking pictures every now and then with his phone. Siana remembered the last time they had felt this comfortable before that fated kiss - when they had strolled amicably together to Miami and had enjoyed drinks and snacks in the late afternoon sun. It was before they realised what a weird roller coaster ride they would take together.

She felt amused by how they seemed to switch from being very comfortable and easy with each other to being highly charged with their attraction for each other. Right now, it felt as if they were old friends hanging out on their way to lunch. Whereas just yesterday, they had kissed under cover of trees to the point that he had to have a few minutes to himself to regain his composure.

Siana had had enough history to know that she had never experienced such a relationship. Perhaps it was because this was Leo, or perhaps it was that what she felt for him was different, new. She was unable to put her finger on it yet, but was looking forward to finding out more about what made their experience together so different from what she knew.

Eventually they entered the town via a sharp turnoff form the highway, into some minor backroads which led them upwards into the town and into a series of one-way roads that had her practically zigzagging towards the centre.

Because it was so old, the town buildings were small, cramped - but very pretty. There was no room for a double carriageway within the town limits, which was why almost every road on the approach to the centre was a one-way street.

Suddenly, they took a turn which brought them down and out into a wide main road that ran along the waterfront. They were at the corner of a U-shaped dock which was a relatively modern addition that took advantage of the calm waters of the naturally wide inlet. On all sides of the wide, beautifully paved pier, were tiny caiques - fishermen's boats - and small yachts and trawlers that were anchored for the day. The waters were dark but clear, and schools of fish could be seen in them. In one corner, a floating hatch bobbed on the waters gently, housing the ducks that lived in the pier waters.

A lone periptero stood at the corner where Siana had brought the car out, and next to it some small, coin-operated children's rides stood adjacent to multiple ice cream fridges.

She turned left and found a spot to park on the road. They got out to see that it was lined with cafes that had covered outdoor seating areas. The whole front of this part of town had been built to accommodate the tourist and young crowd that enjoyed sitting, people watching and mingling with others. It was a high contrast to the rest of the cramped, albeit extremely pretty town.

She locked the door and turned to find Leo had already come around and was waiting to take her hand. They walked along the waterfront for a while, looking at the small boats which were painted in bright colours. She suspected that they were painted and parked for aesthetic value and probably didn't venture out much for actual fishing, even though they were caiques, made for that purpose.

Leo stopped, peering down into the depths of the waters for a moment.

"Do you like the sea?" he asked quietly.

"Yes. I've grown up by the sea. I love it. I used to be brown like a nut because I wouldn't listen to my mum and get out of the water," she smiled up at him.

"It seems a bit scary to me," he said, continuing walking with her. "I can never get used to it. I spent my whole life in the city."

"Why is it scary?" she asked.

"I can't see what is underneath me. And I am scared of the currents." He looked at her thoughtfully. "A person must be very brave, and strong, to face all that without fear."

Siana wished she could say that she was brave and strong about those things, but she knew that really, it was something anybody could be.

"FIrst of all, I feel fear too, if I can't see what's in the water. I don't like to swim in the deep. I have tried scuba diving, and while that can show you what's under there, it doesn't make the fear go away. In fact, it made it worse for me. Secondly, knowing how to swim in the currents, and being wise, is the only strength I have against them. If anyone gets caught in a bad current, it can sweep you away no matter how strong you are."

She smiled up at him.

"So, I swim as far the sand stays right under my feet. And I try not to play guessing games with the currents. Anyway, what I love about the sea is the feel of the water against my skin - so, a swim in the pool is just as pleasant for me as in the sea!" She laughed.

She turned to him suddenly.

"You ever been swimming in the winter? I mean, in the sea?"

"No. You?"

"No. I mean, yes. I swam once when it was an unusually hot day during the winter. It happens quite a lot in Itea. But swimming in the cold doesn't seem right to me."

Leo nodded, agreeing.

They walked along in silence for a little, before they came across a restaurant that was starting to fill up with people. They could smell food, and with a squeeze of his hand, Leo signalled for them to go in.

They found a table by the outdoor heater which had a clear view of the road and the water.

The waiter arrived with a basket of cutlery, paper napkins and half a loaf of bread perched on top and placed it on the table. Siana noticed LEo looking at the bread.

"It's part of the service charge, we get bread," she informed him, to which he nodded. She asked the waiter what the order of the day was, to which he replied fresh grilled octopus. After a brief discussion with Leo, she ordered a serving of marida (fried smelt), octopus, stuffed vineleaves, a greek salad and fries.

The salads arrived almost immediately, and Siana showed Leo that he could dip the bread into the olive oil and salt salad dressing which had become infused with the juice from the tomato and the dried oregano. They both had an appetite, and had had several slices of the thick bread when the first plate of fried smelt arrived.

Simply prepared, they were dusted with flour and then fried and served with large wedges of lemon. These were little fish almost like sardines, but with softer flesh and less of a strong taste. They could be eaten whole, and as they crunched on them, Siana and Leo looked at each other, smacking their lips over the food.

"A beer or retsina would be nice right now," Leo said, popping a fish tail into his mouth and munching happily. He spied the waiter coming over with a couple of plates.

"Would you like something to drink?" he asked. Siana nodded. "Cola please."

Leo ordered with the waiter as he put down a plate of hot fries and a small serving of stuffed vine leaves - which were usually just filled with a seasoned, herbed rice mixture but often came with different meats. Theirs was just a little on the tart, vinegary side, which went perfectly with all the fried goodness they were enjoying.

At last the octopus arrived, grilled and tender and cut into small pieces. It was served with a bowl of an oil and lemon mixture sprinkled through with dried herbs and garlic.

"Is this enough?" Siana asked, one cheek full as she licked the corner of her mouth.

Leo, who had a half-eaten fish held daintily in one hand and a forkful of fries in the other, nodded as he swallowed before eating each item, one after the other. The waiter returned with drinks and they seemed to relax over their food after their initial feeding semi-frenzy.

Leo held up his drink to Siana as he chewed. She clinked her glass to his beer, saying, "Nice to meet you, Jung Taekwoon."

He smiled, finally swallowing. They drank. The beer was ice cold and was a pleasant counterpoint to the rich, though simple food. He felt himself relax a little more, and felt pleased to see Siana eating with an almost reverent gusto.

"Siana-ssi." She stabbed at a slice of tomato and put it into her mouth, listening.

"What did you think when you first met us that day?"

Siana put her fork down, chewing thoughtfully. How could she put it into words, without sounding breathless, silly or infatuated, that it was one of the loveliest, most shocking, happy, disappointing and electrifying moments in her short little life?

"Well, I wasn't expecting Vixx. And I was surprised by how friendly most of you were," Siana looked at him pointedly, sipping some cola with a queen-like grace. He laughed, feeling so tickled by her sarcasm that he clapped his hands in amusement.

"Ah. I have to apologise. I don't have an excuse for my behaviour. It was a bit rude."

"Not rude-" How could she say she was disappointed that he wasn't more personable at their first meeting because he was her bias and she had been fangirling over him for almost two years? No way. It was too soon for that.

Thinking about it being too soon made Siana think about the time in the future when she might be able to confess that to him - which made her wonder how long they could expect to go. It seemed so surreal, not only because it was Leo, but also because it was the first time she had really felt this deep attraction for someone.

She was smart enough to know that perhaps some of it was due to her prior long-standing relationship with him, which really was a one-sided fantasy. She couldn't help but wonder why he seemed to have the same level of infatuation for her, seeing as he had only known her for a week now. And he had only known her a day before their kiss.

Was it really possible, all this "love at first sight" stuff?

From being especially distant at their first encounter, to waylaying her for a dizzying kiss in the carpark just a day later, something about Leo had turned him from being indifferent to being urgently attracted to her. She wondered if he was simply an intense sort of person, whose emotions, thoughts, or attraction to others could just be vamped up in such a short amount of time.

She found that very attractive, even though she had always thought that she would prefer a steadfast sort of person to fall in love with. That sudden deep attraction could very well turn into a sudden deep revulsion too. And yet, that fear itself was what made it attractive to her.

She could see that what she wanted in her ideal man, did not necessarily match up with what she wanted from the man in front of her. She continued.

"-Perhaps a bit cold. Maybe shy. I don't know. But I don't think you were rude."

Leo looked down, playing with the glass in his hand. He had a habit of sticking his jaw out with his lips pursed tightly together, then biting his lower lip. When he found himself doing it, he would stop, but it left his lips wet.

Siana had a sudden wish to lick them dry, like a cat would lick another for comfort.

Siana drew in a deep breath, trying to steer her thoughts elsewhere. Imagining herself licking him for comfort made her jaw go slack, and she felt embarrassed that her thoughts had caused such a physical reaction in her that anyone could see what she was thinking. She took a gulp of her drink, dragging her eyes away from him to look around the place.

Because if I were licking his lips for comfort, I would be all over him, holding him down, and it would be entirely for my pleasure and-

Siana put her drink down so hard that Leo looked up. She tried to control her breath, but her heart was suddenly beating so fast. He was startled by her demeanour.

"What is it?"

"Nothing. My hand slipped. You were saying?" Siana was aware that some people were glancing their way. She schooled her features and tried to relax.

"I wasn't saying anything. But I was thinking of how I behaved that day. I wish I had been nicer from the beginning."

"It's alright, I barely noticed because everyone else was being so nice to me," she smiled sweetly.

Leo pursed his lips, scowling.

"Yes. Ken."

Siana laughed and buried her face in her hands. She remembered that she suspected him of spying on her while she had been dancing alone to Hug Me, pretending that she was gyrating against the absent dancer she was doing her routine with.

"What?" Leo asked, wondering why she was cringing.

"You know, I think he was spying on me that day. Before you all came along."

Leo nodded, suddenly stiff.

"Why do you think that?"

"Well, I saw someone in the mirror. Standing in the staircase. I don't know how long he was there for. But as soon as he came in, he looked at me so directly, remember? He came right up to me. I assume it was because he knew what I had been doing before you all arrived. Maybe spying is not the right word. But he still hasn't admitted he did it."

"Maybe he thinks you might get embarrassed if you knew it was him," Leo said, quietly.

"It didn't embarrass me at all at the time. Not until I realised who you guys were. People often look in while I am rehearsing or teaching, either by mistake or because they want to watch - so I thought it was just someone who had come at the wrong time, then left. Everyone knows I rehearse alone, so they wouldn't have been surprised."

"Maybe he was embarrassed," Leo ventured, a little more quietly.

"Well, he came on a little strong, so that could be true. Maybe it was bravado." Siana mused. Leo seemed to perk up at this information.

"You think he came on too strong?" Siana nodded a little apologetically.

"It's kind of the stuff he would do on camera, so I thought it was a front. For example, Hongbin was completely laid back and genuine. It didn't feel like he was trying to impress me."

Leo nodded, thoughtful. So Siana was suspecting Ken, not realising that the bravado or the front that she was talking of, that she believed he did for the cameras, was really his character, especially when he was full of energy. Ken was always playful, always reaching out somehow to make others happy. Leo realised that because his intended audience was someone like Siana, his playing would have taken on a flirty edge.

And someone like Siana could well believe that it was put on - and in the circumstances, done to cover up his guilt of spying.

Leo didn't want Siana to have a false impression of Ken, so he felt the need to speak up on his behalf.

"But why don't you suspect Hongbin?" He came to close to saying "or myself?" and felt that if he did he would give himself away.  
Siana smiled dreamily for a moment.

"N and Hongbin were my friends before you could bring yourself to be nicer to me," she joked, watching his face for his reaction. He crinkled up his eyes and smiled, looking abashed. How was he so handsome? She thought to herself.

"Yes, I can see Hakyeonnie has claimed you as his soulmate. You know he has scolded me about you?" Leo stopped smiling, and she realised he had not intended to reveal that much to her.

"If he did, then you must have really deserved it," she said with a naughty smile. Leo laughed again, her words taking him by surprise. Leo realised that if Hakyeon ever sided with Siana against him, he would lose.

What am I thinking? Hakyeon will always side with Siana - he loves her so much - Leo thought, half pleased and half scared about that notion.

They slipped into a silence as they finished off the food and leaned back into their chairs.

"Let's walk it off," Siana said as she signalled for the bill. Leo insisted on paying, then they got their coats and left.

 

**

Leo knew he didn't have much time.

He presumed that since Siana had already talked to him about her unknown Peeping Tom, she could possibly talk to any of the others about it too, and his identity as Tom would be revealed. It would definitely be in his favour to be the one to do it first, than be found out. He presumed Hongbin had kept the knowledge to himself, but Leo hadn't asked him to, and he may feel free to divulge the information to any of the others, or even to Siana, if she asked him.

He felt uncomfortably nervous for some reason, like it was a confession that could change things between them. He knew he had to do it soon.

Today. Now.

Or else he would never find the right moment, and, as was his usual habit, he would procrastinate until he was forced to confront it, which until now, he had been fortunate enough to somehow avoid. People often forgot, or it was a situation where he could bravado his way through, or pretend ignorance.

But he couldn't do that for this situation.

Somehow he felt overly burdened by this tiny secret that he should have exposed immediately.

I was too busy being overcome, he thought, glancing down at Siana as they walked along the pier back to the car. They got in, and she drove along the other side of the U-shaped dock into small road that followed the shored further along the coast. The road was lined with pine trees that lead up a small hill which they rounded towards the west.

He felt like he had wasted time spending a week apart from her. They had very little time to have to themselves, since, once he was back into his usual schedules, their time together would become other people's time.

It was hard enough doing that with his own family, whom he realised were better off keeping their private lives separate from his public life. When they attended any of his shows, they couldn't arrive together, couldn't leave together. His time at work was everyone's time, and he couldn't adequately pay attention to his loved ones while he was expected to attend to the business of being an idol. So, when they came to support him and cheer him on, he couldn't stand greet them, or walk them out in public after each show.

Life had become a series of transfers between cars and venues, airport runway walks and interplay with fan reporters, and rehearsals. He had a great passion for singing, performing and creating music - and did enjoy the adulation in his own way. But now, going back to that seemed a rather dull prospect.  
Here I am, imagining situations that haven't happened yet, that I have no real control over from this far ahead of their time, he thought, helplessly. He supposed he would never stop being like this, but realised he could stop those thoughts and focus on actually taking some action instead.

They passed by a tiny bay with a narrow strip of a pebbley beach, and eventually came to a small promontory of rock that had been paved with the dead end of the road. At the very end, a small white building stood right at the edge of the water. Siana parked and they got out. She lead him towards the building, which he realised was not a building at all, but rather a concrete framework that looked like a monument, or a piece of architectural art.

Against the deep sparkling green of the sea and the brilliant blue sky, the stark white concrete made a beautiful contrast. It seemed such an unusual thing to be perched on the edge of the waters like this, out of sight from the rest of the world.

"I don't really know what this is. It looks like an unfinished shed, doesn't it? I think it is an outdoor setup for the hospitality academy," Siana said, indicating the hill behind them. Leo turned to see there was a hostel-like building perched on the top of it.

"It's pretty," Leo said absently, looking back down at Siana.

She pulled his hand gently as she walked towards the water's edge. It was a man-made pier built on a tumble of rocks and concrete, and they stood about a metre above the sea level on a flat pouring of concrete, traversed by a single, foot-wide, angular arch of white concrete. The water was clear and still, with barely a wave lapping at the stones

They looked out towards the water, and Siana pointed to a faint outline of mountains on the horizon.

"You can see the Peloppenese mountain range there, see? Ah, it's so beautiful!" She sighed, and he glanced at them for a moment, more because she asked him to than because he was interested. He wanted to watch her face as she stared out into the green-grey light.

He stood a little behind her, enough so that she didn't notice he was staring, and watched as she closed her eyes and breathed in the sea air gently. The corner of her mouth lifted as she smiled, and he noticed again the little mole at her jawline just in front of her ear. She ran her hand through her hair, pulling it back to lift it out from under her jacket, where some of it had caught when she put it on. He glimpsed the back of her lovely neck before her hair fell back down in a flurry. Then she turned to him suddenly, catching him watching her.

Oh, how he hated being caught out.

Without thinking, he said, "It was me."

Her surprise at having found him staring turned into confusion as she raised her eyebrows. "Sorry?"

He almost laughed at himself. He believed he blurted it out because he was trying to cover the fact that he had been caught staring.

You idiot, he thought. Always looking to sidestep the issue has brought you to this. He supposed it was a good thing, since it was leading him to tell the truth for something more important. Or at least, to stop lying by omission and avoidance.

He was distracted by her eyes, which had relaxed in their surprise and were now watching him with an open, curious light. Did she realise what effect that had on him? He felt like he could fall into them, and dissolve.

"Who was you?" she prompted, her eyes crinkling as she smiled. He looked down at her smile, her rosy lips soft and inviting. Smiling made her face heart-shaped. He saw her become aware of him staring at her lips, and he felt heartened to see her turn away a little, affected by his attention.

"Go on, spit it out." She said, rolling her eyes.

"I was the one who was watching you that day. In the studio." He said, letting go of a breath he didn't realise he was holding. She gasped, looking up at him in what looked like terror. For a moment, he felt panic that she might think the worst.

He could see her mentally going over something, and a crinkle appeared between her brows as she worried her lower lip with her teeth.

"What did you- I mean, how long... How much did you see?" she asked anxiously.

"Everything from just before Crush began to sing," he said quietly. He could see her run back through her memory of that day, and saw on her face the moment that she realised that he had seen pretty much every little sensual expression, gyration and thrust she had made during her rehearsal, and even the silly belly-dancing and laughing to herself.

He was charmed by how her face crumpled in despair that he had seen every little thing. She whimpered as she suddenly grabbed his jacket lapels and hid her face against his chest, pulling the jacket around the sides of her face to hide herself.

He was taken aback, not expecting that she would feel so upset about it that she would hide her face in this manner. He thought she would be mad, or worse, unaffected. He felt a peculiar pleasure and pride that this was her reaction.

He wanted to pull her close, but before he could raise his arms, she pulled away and buried her face in both hands, shaking her head.

"Sorry! Oh god, oh god!" she murmured, barely controlling her voice.

"Are you mad at me?" he asked, perplexed. He wasn't sure if he should be as happy and as proud as he felt.

"No. Nonono! Oh god!"

She suddenly turned to him, he noticed amusedly, wringing her hands unconsciously.

"I wasn't dancing by myself. I mean, it was supposed to be with a partner. It wasn't me... getting busy... in the mirror, by myself, for myself, I mean for my character's self - you know? It was from a routine. With a partner. But I was alone. Please say you get it. Oh god!"

Leo couldn't help it, he had to smile.

"It's okay, either way. Aren't you mad at me?"

"For what?"

"For not admitting it was me," he said.

"Well, why didn't you?" she asked, catching her breath.

Because you might think I was a creep, he thought, hesitating to answer.

"I mean people walk in on me rehearsing all the time, so the only reason would be that... you didn't like what you saw," she mumbled, looking away.

How to say that I liked what I saw without sounding like a creep, he thought.

"But you know, it was just practise. I wasn't trying to get off or anything. Oh god!" She squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head.

She thinks I think she's a creep, he thought, mindlessly. He didn't know how to stop her train of thought and reassure her that she had nothing to fear about how he thought of her. Wasn't it enough that they were together, now? What did it matter something that happened before that fact?

Because it has been important to me to come to this point where I could confess. And now she knows it was me, it is important to her. He realised how he behaved now was going to be the deciding factor in how she would view this shared moment - and that past, shared moment in the studio.

Gently, he took her hands and squeezed them.

"I liked what I saw. Because it looked like you liked what you were doing, which of course, I liked. And I know it was just dancing. I realised it was for some routine because you were going over it again and again."

He could see her relaxing a little, even though she was still cringing.

"Why would you think I didn't like it?

"You seemed so scary and distant that day, that I preferred to believe it was Ken. Or Hongbin. Now that I think of it, you looked angry."

I was worried you would recognise it was me that was watching and think I was a creep, he thought to himself incredulously. All his worry over what he would look like and he had missed this opportunity to allay her own fears that he might dislike her or disapprove. He could see that, rather than being embarrassed that he had caught her dancing suggestively, she worried that he might have misjudged her character that first day, because of the moody face he had on when they met.

Me and my moody face, he thought.

"I wasn't angry. I thought you might figure out it was me spying on you, and I didn't want to be caught like that," he said. Her face relaxed.

"But you were spying on me."

"Yes-"

"Which is creepy if you don't admit to it," she said, her expression thoughtful.

"But-"

"I guess it would be hard to do in front of everyone, and my dad," she tapped a finger on her chin.

"Ah, yes, that's why-"

"But to wait a week, now that's what I'm trying to understand," she frowned as if she was thinking hard.

Leo blinked, worried. He needed the right words, needed to make things right, and he found himself unable to explain himself properly in such a way as to clear things up for her.

Then he saw her lips press together in an attempt to stop herself smiling. Her eyes took on a mischievous cast as she peered up at him. He felt relief flood him as he realised that she was tormenting him, but also felt a flash of heat that she had gotten the better of him. When had she gotten over her embarrassment? He missed that moment, and wondered if he would ever be able to accurately read her emotions and behaviour.

That feeling that he was off the hook, mixed with the anger over being tricked, and the strange, discomforting understanding that he would never really be able to pin her down, created a sudden rush of feeling that he could only describe as desire.

He wanted to punish her and kiss her at the same time, but he felt as if he needed permission to do any of it - and that irked him because that meant he was not in control. She was.

This creature who seemed inordinately embarrassed by the realisation that he was the one, the spy, this thing who could take care of herself without him, who had wanted nothing more than a dalliance while he waited out the rest of his trip... This girl, this woman whom he had barely known for a week - what was it about her that pulled him to her so hard?

She was independent without acting standoffish - in fact she seemed so girly sometimes, despite her lack of concern for fashion trends and makeup. She seemed to need no one, even though she was warm and giving. She seemed innocent, but wildly knowing. He couldn't help but wonder about the depths of her character, and wanted desperately to know if she was as smitten by him as he was by her.

He realised she had an attraction for him - but was that her living out a fantasy come true with her idol? He couldn't help but question whether his celebrity got in the way of him ever knowing the true mind of another.

Her behaviour, from serious, grounded, and sometimes sentimental, could flit over to silly, mischievous and brazen in an instant. Could she be playing him?  
It was possible, he thought, but he sensed that there was more to her than that, and only had to look at her relationships with others to see that she was kind and compassionate. The way they treated her showed him who she was - and he felt that she was genuine.

So, he could accept that this was her character, and that as he felt himself to be slow on the uptake when it came to reading others, he would always be in a state of flux when it came to her.

It excited him more than he wanted to admit, and he worried that he would show that in his face.

He watched as her expression changed, turning from naughty to sober in an instant. Was that a touch of fear he saw?

"I can't tell if you're mad, or..." she caught her breath as he bent forward and took her mouth urgently.

She softened immediately, returning his kiss with fervour. Whatever fear she may have felt, she certainly had none now.

He felt as if he was trying to posses her, to persuade her into submission, but knew that she was giving him as much as he was giving her in that kiss.

Her hands wandered under his jacket and travelled down his chest to his belly before they came back up again, and he wondered how the girl who had been cringing just a moment ago when she had discovered it was him who had spied on her, now had the gumption to touch him so freely. He grabbed them, pulling away sharply to see her dazed expression as she looked up at him in surprise.

"What are you doing?" he said breathlessly.

"I don't know, let me think," she said, her eyes hooded. Smart mouth, he thought, wanting to shut it.

"Just a moment ago you were shy," he said, accusingly.

"Just a moment ago you kissed me first," she said, opening her lips as she watched him speak. "Why are you talking so much?"

He paused, his hands still holding hers at his chest. She dragged her eyes away from his mouth and looked up at him pleadingly.

"Is this a habit I should know about? Because it's the second time," she whispered, her eyes soft.

"I can't tell what you're thinking," he said, alarmed.

"I'm not thinking, I'm doing. Do it with me," she said, her breath hot. She splayed her closed fingers out against his chest, letting her fingertips rub against the fabric of his shirt. He felt her lean in as she looked up at him imploringly.

"Please," she whispered, her eyes deep depths of desire.

He couldn't remember what it was that made him interrupt their kiss, and wondered what kind of fool he was to want to pursue that chain of thought at that moment, of all moments.

He forgot pride, forgot doubts, forgot logic and reasoning. What did it matter whatever questions he wanted answers to right now?

He felt as if she was asking him to forget it all, and to step over the edge with him and leave rationality behind.

He could feel his body quicken, and respond to that request ahead of his thoughts, and for the first time understood what falling headlong into the unknown felt like: incredibly freeing and enthralling.

He let go of her wrists, and felt her hands smooth their way up to his shoulders. One hand travelled up the side of his neck to the back of his head, where she ran her fingers up through his hair as she tilted her face up towards him.

His breathing became heavy as she grasped his hair in her closed fist, and he leaned and angled his head towards her. Their lips met, and he felt as if he could never get enough of her as she responded to his ardour with an eager tongue.

His thoughts didn't flow one after the other, but became shards of knowing that seemed irrelevant and unnecessarily busy. There was nothing steady, nothing grounded, nothing examined.

He was all senses, all feeling, all heartbeat and all mouth.

I am stepping over the edge. Falling in to the unknown. Tumbling into the abyss.

**

Propriety.

What did that mean anymore? Siana vaguely thought as she tugged on her hands which Leo held tight against his chest.

I have just lost the last vestiges of any sense of propriety I might have had. Kiss, Leo. Leo, kiss me. Don't stop, why are you talking?

Her thoughts went through her head as if she were under a dreamy spell. She wanted to beg him not to stop.

So it had been Leo all along, not Ken. The moment she clicked that was what he meant by "it was me", an almost-sleeping dread had reawakened, and the mortification that he had seen her do all those things in the mirror made her cringe so hard.

But his words made it clear to her: he was more afraid of her reaction than she was of his. After all, as she had said, that sort of situation happened to her all the time. Plus because she had already gotten over the fact that N and Hyuk had witnessed her wanton display, it had eased her past the horrible revelation faster than she expected. Realising that Leo had found it burdensome to have kept the secret triggered the trickster inside her, and she just had to have a little fun with him while she could.

But now, he was doing that thing again, interrupting their kiss with that second-guessing, that double-analyzing, and here she was waiting for him to settle his thoughts while he held her hands to his chest. He had grasped them more than a little roughly, and if she hadn't seen the genuine need for answers in his face, she might have thought that it was incredibly hot.

But she had never felt so close to this sort of frustration before.

The first time, he had awkwardly, disastrously proven himself to be a concerned gentleman. Now, he seemed to need a lesson in kissing etiquette: finish first, talk later. Don't leave the lady waiting.

"Do it with me," Siana heard herself pining. She couldn't let him set the tone of their encounter, she wanted to have more than just a taste.

She reached out to him, touching him through his clothes, wishing she could do more, but she sensed that if she tried pulling away to free her hands, she would break the spell.

"Please," she breathed, finally realising that she had no more feeling about him seeing her dance alone, no more embarrassment or mortification. She didn't care much that he had only told her now - in fact she thought he had told her just at the right time.

Because right now she was ready to show him all of that, to give it to him if he wanted it, and more.

Propriety. What did that mean anyway? She felt like any sort of propriety she had ever had when it came to boys or love or sex had disappeared.

At least when it come to this man.

So when he finally relented and kissed her again, she let the frustration of all their stop-and-start moments fuel the hunger in her kiss. She could feel him relenting, letting go, and when she grabbed his hair he stepped forward involuntarily, hunching over and holding her so close she could feel his torso against hers.

She felt his breath become ragged as she arched towards him, and her body seemed to hum with tension as she felt her breasts brush against him.

He moaned, taking his mouth away and leaning his forehead against hers, panting. Their breaths mingled for a moment before she opened her eyes to look at him. His eyes were closed, and he had a small frown on his brow as he tried to control his breathing.  
For a moment she thought that maybe he felt it was going to fast, or that she was coming on too strong, so she waited, even though she wanted to take his mouth in hers. Then he took a long breath, exhaling gently as he nuzzled his nose against hers, his warm lips looking for her mouth.

He planted soft, sucking kisses on her lips, one at a time, slowing the pace, making her reach for him each time with her mouth, all the while running his hands slowly under her jacket to go round her waist. He stroked her back languidly, sending shivers up her spine, as he loved her with his lips.

The kiss had changed, from being urgent and rather hard, to becoming softer, more pliant. There was something else, a sort of purposeful advancement, and she realised he was building her excitement and her desire, making her feel needy for it, making her want him to never stop.

Triple T, she thought, you know how to turn a girl on.

She felt his fingers brush the edge of her top upwards and slip under to caress the skin on her back. Then both his hands were sliding upwards, pressing against her upper back so that he held her tight against him for a moment, before he released her and let them dawdle lazily back down, the light traces of his fingertips against her skin making her gasp involuntarily.

This time she broke the kiss, her head rolling back to expose her neck as she sighed deeply, closing her eyes against the brilliant light of the day.

He paused, watching her with eyes like a wolf, hungry, breathless and on edge. As she opened her eyes and tried to straighten up, she felt him lean forward to nuzzle her neck, his nose running along the length of it til he reached her ear, where he put his tongue under her earlobe and sucked on it, sweetly.  
Siana felt a deep wave of pleasure mount in her body, which made her moan so hard she sobbed.

She clutched at his neck and shoulders as he suckled on her earlobe before moving downwards onto her neck and jawline, planting more soft, suckling kisses on her skin, which seemed to prickle in anticipation of his next move.

She felt as if the flesh under her skin was thrumming, as if it were made just for him, and now that she had met him, he had awakened her senses. It was a heady feeling that became more heated as it descended down through her body, from the beating of her heart to the throbbing of her blood in her veins.  
Siana felt him place a languid kiss on her collarbone, then pause. He seemed to be scenting her skin, his nose barely an inch from her body, his eyes closed. She could sense that he was biding his time, perhaps trying to collect himself, or wondering whether he should go further.

Yes, keep going, you were heading downwards, she thought mindlessly.

He took a deep breath, and she sensed that he was trying to gain control of himself, his breathing short and sharp. He looked up at her, his mouth hot and red, his eyes wild, and swallowed hard. He still had his hands under her shirt, but they were still, and warm. She arched her back a little, to feel them press against her again. She felt them shift onto her waist, but outside of the fabric, as he stepped back a little, still a little breathless.

"Siana-ssi if we don't stop now-"

"We don't have to stop," Siana breathed, her eyes half-closed as she looked back at him.

"-I'm not sure I can be responsible for what could happen," he mumbled, staring into her beautiful, sensual eyes.

Siana almost giggled. He sounded like what he looked like: someone out of a period drama.

"You're so sexy," she said, before she realised she had said it out loud. She put her hand up to cover her mouth, giggling a low giggle as she looked up at him. She didn't mean to just say that like that. It seemed so unnecessary, such an obvious statement. But more than that, it was an admission of her desire that was frank, and let him know what she liked.

He watched her as she covered her mouth, ignoring what she said. With a look a little like impatience, he pulled on her hand so he could see her smile. With a last glance, he brought his hands up to cup her face and kissed her again before running his fingers through her hair and bunching it in his fists as he opened her mouth with his tongue and traced the inside of her lips with it.

Siana liked seeing that moment of impatience in his eyes, as if she had obstructed his view, or his access to her mouth. She liked that despite his own attempt to slow things down, he couldn't stop himself when it came to her, and that sexual power over him made her eager to give him more, to make it worth his while.  
Siana, what happened to the you who flew across the world just days ago?

She felt as if some part of her that had been dormant all her life, a part of her that enjoyed having power over someone else, that loved being the object of someone's desire, and that wanted to pleasure him purely for physical gratification, had awakened - and instead of it being a stranger, was like an old friend that she recognised and felt at home with instantly.

Maybe she was a late bloomer. She had never understood girls her age going crazy for boys when she was in school. Or maybe it was just that I subconsciously wanted to go there with the right kind of person.

Well, Triple T was definitely the right kind of person.

Siana-ssi, you're secretly wanton and you like it, she thought to herself, suddenly sucking on his tongue.

He broke away, letting her go, stepping back with a sort of snarl on his face as he gasped.

"If we don't stop I'm going to embarrass myself like a green schoolboy," his snarl turning into a pained, lopsided smile as he dropped his head.

She reached for him, completely turned on now, but he caught her hands by the wrists to stop her from touching him. Oh, she wanted to touch him!

He pivoted suddenly towards the car, her hands firmly in his wristlock, and took her round to the driver's seat, opening the door and sitting her down bodily before slamming it shut. She saw him pause outside the door for a moment before walking round to the passenger seat and getting in.

She smiled and bit her lip when she saw him gathering his long limbs into the car and sitting knees together, angled away from her.

"Seatbelt," he said firmly, pulling his own on and running his hands through his hair as she strapped in.

"Drive," he said, resting his elbow against the car door and biting on a fingernail as he looked outside.

She started the car, the sensual heat in her body gradually cooling into a molten pool in her belly as she turned and headed back the way they came. A smile played on her lips as she glanced over at him. He seemed shaken by the force of their attraction, as she noticed him worrying his fingernail between his teeth.

"Can we have lunch again tonight?" she asked, her voice husky.

He laughed, shaking his head. His toothsome smile made her happy, and she loved seeing his eyes crinkle up into sweet lines.

"You're greedy," he said, looking out the window.

"You're tasty," she countered, then seeing him bite his lip. Was she shocking him? She wondered. She was in a playful mood, but he seemed to get serious, and she wondered if he was into what she was saying, or whether he disapproved somehow.

It was an observation she was making because of his sombre reaction. After all, he didn't disapprove when they were all over each other a few moments ago. So she could suppose that how she was speaking to him was having a stronger effect on him than mere playfulness would. It made her feel so good that admitting to her desire for and appreciation of him, affected him deeply.

Leo wanted more than just a holiday romance. But was this going too fast?

Siana felt that things were taking their course, and that having been separated for a week, the course was such that they had a lot of catching up to do and she didn't think it was wrong for them to have such powerful physical encounters. They were adults after all.

But for some reason, Siana sensed she was much more eager than he was to see the natural progression of their encounter through.  
If he was having second thoughts, Siana wanted to know so that she could reassure him that, on her side, she was quite ready to go as far as possible with him, and that he needn't hesitate over her needs.

And I didn't know it until today, but I have a whole bunch of needs that only Jung Taekwoon can take care of for me.

She smiled to herself, a little shocked at the direction her thoughts were going.

Who are you and what have you done with Siana? she thought to herself, picking up speed as she got onto the highway and headed back home.

**

Hongbin was dimly aware of the spinning lights and the thumping of the house music as he leaned against the darkened wall behind the central bar of the club. His head felt heavy as he dangled the thin neck of his beer bottle between his two fingers. He shut his eyes for a moment, letting his chin fall towards his chest.  
The electronic pulsing of the bass sent thrums through his body, making him feel like his blood was settling in his legs and feet, making him feel rooted to the spot.

It was like a dull heartbeat that reminded him that he was lonely, with no one to share the excitement of the club, or to feel the heady fizz of alcohol buzzing through his veins.

The song's vocalist sang a high ethereal note, creating a buzzing feeling in his head - and he began to feel as if he was stuck in some sort of time or dimension warp. He wasn't quite feeling himself.

He needed to get out.

He tried to stand up straight, to take a few steps, but to his alarm he found he was immobile. He couldn't even open his eyes, it felt as if his muscles were deadened and heavy.

The only thing that didn't feel that way was his heart, which was racing uncomfortably.

I need help. I need someone, he thought.

It was as if he had been buried alive, and had nothing but his thoughts to keep him company through hell's panic and the terrifying sensation of drowning, in air.

"It's a dream," he heard a soft voice in his head say.

He felt a warm touch on his chest, someone trying to calm his racing heart by pressing on it. It soothed him, despite the fact that his heart kept beating too fast.

Someone was helping him.

"Breathe," the voice said, a soft whisper he could hear through the cottonheaded sound of house music.

His immobilised, weighted chest heaved and he felt the cool rush of air in his lungs which felt like succour after a long unhappiness. I can breathe, I feel better, he thought, feeling the bottle fall from his hand.

Or did someone take it? He frowned, his eyes still closed. He felt like he was going to cry, but there were no tears, only fear, discomfort... and trust in the voice he could hear in his head.

The hand moved to his shoulder, squeezing til he could feel his muscles relax and warm up. Then it went round his neck, the heat soothing his skin, and he felt the warm rush of sweet breath as she whispered at his ear.

"For looking after me. For watching me. For loving me."

Then soft lips pressed against his cheek near his ear, making his breath deepen suddenly. He felt those lips kiss him again on the cheek, and then softly press against his mouth.

He didn't kiss back, though his body was responding. His breath caught, and he shuddered involuntarily.

Who was she?

With great effort he opened his pained eyes, but it was dark and he couldn't focus. He felt her put her other hand round his neck as well, and she leaned against him, opening her mouth to kiss him again.

He sighed, giving in, letting himself receive her gentle attentions. His head bowed, her hands twined around his neck, it felt as if she were breathing life into him, and he gradually felt himself become lighter, breathing deeper, feeling oh so much better.

It was as if the dull warped sounds of the music were catching up to speed, and he was suddenly back in the present, feeling more like himself, though in the arms of an unknown woman who seemed to have a healing touch in her kiss.

He put his hands on her hips, to gently push her back so he could take a look at her.

It was Siana, who looked at him as if she were dying of thirst and he was the last water she had.

With a cry he pushed her away, only to have all the lights come on suddenly and the wall behind him slam into his back with tremendous force.

Hongbin saw stars, his head concussed, his chest a vacuum from losing his breath after getting winded.

He looked around, surprised to see the nightclub had a fireplace a bit like the one in their living room, and that the sofa there was right next to him against the wall that hit him, too.

"Hyung, you okay?" he heard Hyuk's lazy, napped-out voice ask him.

He looked up to see Hyuk sprawled across the other sofa, one arm slung over his eyes to keep the afternoon light out of his eyes. The tv was on, but it was a blare of inaudible speech from the variety show that was on. Above him he looked to see that the kitchen on the ceiling contained a very concerned-looking Ken who was holding a kettle he was about to pour hot water out of into a mug.

He realised he wasn't standing against a nightclub wall, but had fallen off his couch, startled by a very vivid dream.

A nightmare, he thought, panicked by the mental movements of his psyche's subconsciousness.

A fantasy, he thought again, remembering the cool touch of her lips which had brought him back from the edge of a painful, dull existence.  
He felt his body respond again, as if she were still holding him and kissing him so sweetly. He glanced at Hyuk in alarm, trying to gauge if he had given himself away somehow.

"Ow," he said aloud. Hyuk shifted to lie on his side, facing away.

"Hyung, you had a bad dream. Were you drowning? Or falling? Or dying? It sounded scary," Hyuk mumbled, his breathing regulating quickly.

All of the above, and more, Hongbin thought. He picked himself up, sitting back on the sofa and putting his face in his hands.

"Sounded like something else to me," Ken said loudly, turning towards the sink to attend to his task. Hongbin waited to see if Ken would say more, but he didn't.  
He knew it was just a dream, just an acting out of a jumble of thoughts he had thought during the day which his mind was just purging to reset his brain.  
Except instead of expunging these thoughts, I have more and I like the feelings I have during and after, thought they are laced with panic and fear and are accompanied by petrifying palpitations - Hongbin thought.

Now that he was certain he hadn't somehow unconsciously revealed himself or the name of the subject of his dreams to Ken or Hyuk whilst he was asleep, he wanted to close his eyes and continue the dream from before he left off.

He wanted that kiss again, and to see in her eyes that he was everything she needed.

Hongbin frowned, his mouth a thin line.

Given the depth of his physical and emotional feelings, and the alarm with which he viewed himself as disloyal, to Leo, to himself, to Siana - Hongbin felt that he wouldn't be able to face any of them if he tried to relive the dream again.

He could see the image of that pretty face again, made even more beautiful by the desire in it as she looked at him in his dream.

How could he look at Siana in the eyes after this without revealing to her what had gone through his head? He didn't think he could. She would see in a heartbeat the very thing he would try to hide. Because when he saw her, he would relive that moment in his dream.

I really do have to get out of here, he thought, meaning, away from Siana, away from the reality of her and Leo. He didn't feel jealous of them, just preoccupied, consumed by thoughts of her which he thought were inappropriate.

Inappropriate, he laughed humourlessly to himself. Hardly the word he would use to describe the thoughts he was having about his Hyung's love interest.  
He had never been in this situation before, had never felt himself itching to cross the line like this. One thing about the dream was right. He felt suffocated, restricted by things that should have made him feel free, feel good.

He had to get out. He had to get away from the very thing he thought should make him happy.

"Ken Hyung, maybe we should take a day trip on our own, just the three of us. Get out of town for a while, be alone." Hongbin put out there, his voice a little querulous from nerves.

"As long as I don't have to drive, I am in," Ken said. Hongbin smiled. Ken always drove, no matter what he said.

"What, now?" Hyuk asked, turning his neck to look over his shoulder at Hongbin as much as he could.

"Yeah, we can go now, great idea!" Hongbin smiled, slapping his hands against his knees in a final sort of way and standing to smooth out his crumpled jeans.

"No, I have plans with my eyelids right now. We're closed." Hyuk mumbled as he settled back in to further his nap-time commune with his eyelids.

"Okay, what about tomorrow? Let's go out of town. Let's go to Athens!" Hongbin said with sudden inspiration. Ken shouted in agreement from the kitchen, and even Hyuk nodded in his sleep.

Yes! Having two people agree meant that he had company and could ostensibly avoid having to spend more time in Siana's presence than was necessary. Although he could avoid it by simply staying in the house, Hongbin was spending a lot of time with Siana's cousin and lived in the same building.

They were bound to cross paths again and again.

And Hongbin didn't trust himself to keep himself to himself anymore.

**

They reached home and Siana parked further down the road where she found a space. She felt unready to be apart from Leo, and could sense that he wanted to be with her as much as he could today too, from the way he hung back by his car door as she locked up. They looked at each other across the hood of the car, a new meaning in their gazes.

Things had progressed beyond what she thought were preliminary stages of a relationship. They were heading towards an important milestone, and she wanted her eyes and heart open along the way there.

Life is no longer coming towards me, I am going towards it, she thought, feeling buoyed by the thought of it.

"Can we go for a walk?" she asked. He nodded, reaching a hand towards her as he walked to the front of the car. She took it, and they naturally turned towards  
the sea.

She grasped his long fingers and felt his thumb rub against the underside of her hand, sending a warm trill of excitement up her arm. He walked slightly ahead of her with his long gait, and she watched his profile as he stared ahead. The sea breeze was coming in and because they were in a a wider part of the street approaching the fork in the road, the wind gusted this way and that, and whipped his longish hair across his forehead and cheekbones.

They walked past a square corner house whose yard was filled with cats, some of which were basking in the warm afternoon sun along the top of the high wall that ran in front of the house.

Greek cats seemed to her to be especially fat, cute and lazy, though many were bad-tempered. These wall-topping cats were docile, well-fed and used to attention. They purred loudly as she came closer and reached out towards them.

"They're cute," murmured Leo, watching her let a little, sweet-faced kitty play with her finger. "Do you have a cat?"

Siana paused, not knowing whether to say that she already had her hands on her most favourite of cats, Leo.

She smiled, squinting up at him in the sunlight, waiting to see if he knew that's how many people saw him.

Nothing. He was waiting expectantly.

"I love cats. But I don't have one. My mum thinks she would be doing all the cleaning and caring for me because I'm too busy. So, no cats."

"Is she right?" he looked down at her, serious, except for a tiny twitch at the corner of his mouth.

Siana turned back imperiously to look at the cat which had caught her finger with its tiny padded paws and was gnawing at it with its teeny milky teeth.

"Maybe. Anyway, I go away every year so I suppose she would hate it for two or three months while I am away," she sighed, freeing her finger and petting the cat on its head before stepping back on their way. Leo followed, letting her lead for a moment before he caught up to her again in a stride or two.

"We go back in less than three weeks," Leo said, suddenly. "When are you supposed to return?"

"In the new year," Siana replied, solemnly. He nodded. They were both thinking of what they would have to consider when the time came to make some decisions about what they would do. But neither of them vocalised their thoughts. They turned to walk on.

Leo cleared his throat.

"What will you do now that you have finished school?"

"I'm already working. I have been for the last two years of college, teaching kids and also dancing with a couple of crews. I suppose now I could teach at a school or an academy, but I am happy with my place now."

"Where do you perform?"

"Mostly events, but sometimes tv recordings and competitions. My dance school, where I work at, always sends the teachers out for clinics and workshops, so I do a lot of networking on their behalf," Siana mused.

"You must be good at that," he said.

"Yeah, I am," she said in surprise. Her lady boss relied on her to make contact with potential clients in her stead, and trusted her over her own partners, who were all about the dancing and didn't want to do the business side of business. She had already received an offer to partner with her, but Siana didn't feel ready to get so serious, or to let go of the more creative emphasis she still had on dancing.

"Why do you say so? Is it because I'm chatty and cheerful?" she beamed up at him, jokingly, feeling happy he had complimented her.

"Because you're not shy, even when you are," he said, looking ahead at the seafront they were fast approaching.

Siana took that to mean that he thought that, even if she didn't feel confident, she behaved confidently. She thought that it might be a hang-up of his, just because she saw him as a performer who, up until only recently, never quite felt comfortable in his own skin when required to "perform" as himself rather than as a singer, dancer, an entertainer or a musician.

"Do you think you are shy?" she asked him.

"I'm a performer, how can I be shy?" he mumbled, smiling.

"The urge to express oneself has no correlation to one's shyness, I think. Lots of shy people need to express themselves somehow, and if it is through creativity or performance, then they just go through it. I reckon even extraverts can be shy," she said. "They just relate to people differently."

"I never thought of it that way," he murmured.

"I just realised early I had very little control over how someone saw me. I couldbe good at something or do well, but there was always something that made someone unhappy, so it felt sensible to just be myself. Speaking to strangers is not difficult for me. Neither is asking them for something or refusing to do something for them. It all becomes really simple if you just think about what you want, and try not to over-analyse the whys and the hows. Anyways, my dad always said this Greek saying - "it's not like we'll be sharing our macaroni with them!"

"What does that mean?" he asked, glancing at her.

"Macaroni is simple home cooked food you reserve for family, right? When you're around the kitchen table with loved ones. So it means why should we care for the opinions of people we wouldn't share our cheap old delicious macaroni with?"

Leo looked up at the sky, a smile on his lips.

"Cha Hakyeon must be Greek too," he said to the clouds, shaking his head. Siana laughed.

"Is he the blessing you never thought you wanted?" she giggled. He laughed out loud, surprisingly heartily, which made Siana feel happy for some reason. Who would have thought the sound of someone laughing with genuine enjoyment could have such a strong effect on one's own happiness?

"That person in your life that's like the one you need and who understands you most, but you don't know why because sometimes you wonder what planet they are from and why they care for you, or you for them..." she chatted with a big smile on her face.

"You could say he is like that for me," Leo said, "but you could say that about almost all the others too."

"Hmm, sounds more like you haven't realised that the common denominator in all your problematic relationships is you," she said, peering thoughtfully up at him, like an owlish professor.

He looked at her our of the corner of his eye, a smirk on his lips. Then he sighed deeply as he checked the road for traffic.

"I see you're going to be another "blessing" in my life," he said, sarcastically. She laughed again, again pleasantly surprised that he had a dry sense of humour.  
She had been half-expecting him to react badly to her observation, even if she was teasing him. Some people didn't like being told they needed to look at themselves, no matter how sweetly the message was given.

"I have a couple of those too. My mum, for one. She's quirky, but always says the right thing at the right time. Whatever I need to hear to make things right, you know? My old friend Min too - she's a firecracker. She always calls me on my bullshit."

He listened, processing her words, because he realised they weren't literal. After a moment, he figured out what she meant, but another thought occurred to him.

"Your father?"

"Oh, well Dad is always pretty sensible. Sentimental. I mean, he is now. It's like he's trying to make up for lost time, you know?"

She looked up at him with a little sadness in her eyes, but she smiled.

"Anyway, he's solid. Very easy to get along with, very giving and flexible. But my mum and Min... They're the Hakyeons in my life. I need them even when I don't want to need them. They keep me safe."

She looked into his eyes to see if he understood. It was a moment that gave him insight into who she was - and that was someone who valued the good things, the good people that came to her in her life. He could see it because he knew what that was like, and he wondered why he had never articulated that sentiment to himself before.

It was like seeing someone he didn't know, but recognised. Finding a friend in a stranger, or understanding a strange language somehow.

"Are you sad that he is trying to make up for lost time?" he asked gently.

"I'm sad he feels the need to. I don't think he owes it to me," she said, suddenly tearing up. She looked into the wind, letting it sting her eyes.

Leo watched her as she took control of herself, thinking, that's me too, always trying to control myself. How people see me. He squeezed her hand as if to guide her across the road.

They passed the tiny Miami parking lot and started walking along the stone pier towards the jetty. It was late in the afternoon, and kids were out on bicycles and skateboards. The water was stirred up by the sea breeze, and waves were lapping against the boulders strewn across the water front from the old reclamation that had claimed part of the sea during the building of the pier.

Leo wondered how Siana would behave in full view of the townspeople, whom he knew she would know. Even the boss of Miami, who was serving drinks to his afternoon clientele, was close by and could see them from his place of work if he happened to look outside. Here Leo was a stranger, and she was someone they had watched grow up into a beautiful person. She had more to be concerned about than he did.

But she still held his hand, sometimes swinging it as she chatted excitedly about something, or pointed out spots along the way. He noticed people watching, sometimes looking at him openly with curiosity, other times nodding at them, some looking more or less happy than others. The only time she let go was to pull out the little red hair tie that he had given her, to tie back her hair that was getting messy in the breeze.

"By the way, I love this!" she said to him as she held it up in front of him for a moment before tying up her long straight hair, flicking it out on the last twist. She suddenly seemed dancery to him, with her hair up in a high ponytail.

He wanted to reach out and play with it, to grasp it and smooth it out. He also liked it loose, and suddenly had an image in his mind of her hair strewn across the pillow as she lay sleeping deeply. He coughed, looking out at the sea as a loud wave splashed across the rocks.

They walked past a playground which was fenced off and positioned right by the waterfront, filled with families with little kids playing. A couple of them knew Siana and waved, and Leo noticed one of the little girls in ballet tights and her hair up in a bun, who must have taken one of the classes that morning. She ran up to the perimeter fence and climbed up to look over it at Siana.

"Yeiasou Sianoula!" she called out, waving a pudgy hand. It was a Greek way of cutifying a name, like saying "little Siana".

Siana waved back, speaking to the little girl in Greek. Leo was watching Siana speak animatedly, sweetly asking the girl questions and answering hers. The girl looked at Leo as she conversed, and he realised Siana was being quizzed on who he was. Whatever Siana said, the little girl screwed up her nose and looked at him doubtfully, making Siana giggle.

Siana said a cheery goodbye and waved to the girl's family as they moved away.

"She was wondering who my new friend is," she said as they approached the large main jetty.

"Who is he?" he said, looking at her with a smile.

"Someone I've known for a long time, but whom I have only just met," she smiled back. "She found that a little confusing."

"She didn't like him very much," Leo said, accusingly. Siana laughed.

"Do you think you should value her opinion of him?" Siana asked. He paused, about to say something, but thinking the better of it.

"No. No macaroni," he stated flatly. She scoffed. "Yeah!"

She squeezed his hand, pulling him along until they turned on to the wide jetty which was heavy with a Sunday afternoon traffic made up of slow strollers, dawdlers and people fishing.

They walked near the edge, looking into the clear water, holding on to each other distrustfully as they did so. They made it to the end, but it was so busy with people there was nowhere to stand or sit comfortably without feeling crowded. They turned back, feeling the wind pushing against their backs.

"What will you do when you go back?" Siana asked.

"We will present whatever we have prepared for next year's comeback. And then, rehearsals, concerts. We will travel for almost a month. We might have a short break before we start with the recordings."

"Do you have anything to present yet?

"Nothing much. The others are enjoying letting their bodies rest. And their brains." He smiled, proud of his little joke.

"I have a song." He paused for a moment, then continued, "But whether we use it depends on the overall concept." He looked away, out to sea as they walked back to the main road.

They crossed it and made their way towards the centre of town where they had played basketball on the half-court near the playground.

"What about the choreography you have been doing with N and Ravi?"

Siana couldn't help gushing about it.

"You don't know how excited I was to work with N! And it turned out to be so much fun, better than I thought it could be. He is quite collaborative, and it was great to be able to give my own ideas-"

"Yes I know about your ideas," he interrupted. She looked at him to try to gauge the tone of his expression, knowing that he was referring to her rather close encounter with Ravi that had happened early in rehearsals. She knew there was the possibility that he might actually dislike the thought of it, and that would make things uncomfortable because dance was the last thing she felt she would ever compromise on.

"They're the kind of ideas that give people other ideas," he looked at her with a tight smile. "They're very good and I hated them all!"

She laughed, and he laughed too, as she linked arms with him to lean against him.

He leaned in close, his laughter dying down as he said quietly, "I've never wanted to be Ravi so much."

He said it with such a sudden intensity that Siana felt her breath catch. She checked his expression, half-expecting him to say he felt jealous and wanted to ask her to stop. She felt a charge of excitement ripple through her as she realised that, even if he did say that to her, even if she wouldn't accept it, she liked that he was possessive.

I really am finding out more about myself than I thought I knew, she realised.

"It was just dancing. You know it doesn't mean anything," she said quietly. They slowed to a standstill, having reached the road by the playground and court. He turned to face her, letting her arm go and shoving his hands into his jacket pockets.

She liked seeing the expression on his face, it was focused, intense, making his brows furrow and his lips set in a firm line. Whatever was on his mind seemed about to consume him.

"I know that. I just wanted it to be me." He looked at her with bated breath, as if he was waiting to see if she would react badlly. Siana's heart leapt, and she couldn't help but breathe in sharply, a shy curve on her lips.

He was jealous. She reached her hands out to lightly grasp the open sides on his jacket, then took a step closer as she looked up at him.

"Oh, Hakyeon will be so happy to hear you want to dance too," she said, a bubble of laughter rising up inside her.

It took him a moment to register before he shook his head at her terrible sense of humour and purposely bad timing. He suddenly laughed out loud, a deep-throated guffaw which made her feel tingly in her toes and other places, too.

With that beautiful smile he leaned forward and gave her a deep, breathy kiss, his hands still in his pockets. She let go of his jacket and put her arms around his waist, still giggling as she kissed back. She could feel him sink into it, and realised they were about to get heavy. In front of the playground, with the church-going public and families milling about.

Reluctantly, she pulled back, pushing him back as well. His eyes had gone heavy, and he looked at her with a kind of heat that felt like a languid tension.

The push-and-pull. It seemed to mark their relationship from the start. Hot, cold, relaxed, intense. Heated one moment, chilled and blissful the next. Even their day had been spent like that. They would be talking about family one moment, then kissing with such ardor she wondered how long just kissing would do.  
The only common denominator there is tongue, she thought, stupidly looking at his mouth. I made a great nickname. Triple T, Triple T, Triple T, she thought, licking her lips unawares.

He exhaled sharply, looking up and running a hand through his hair.

He seemed suddenly antsy, almost like he had an itch under his skin that made him jumpy. He looked at her sharply, almost urgently, his eyes a little wild.  
"I want it to be me. I never say things like that. I don't think things like that. I go slow, but now I'm going fast. It feels too fast, but I can't go faster, I don't want to. Do you feel it? Do you understand me? Is it just me?"

Siana was taken aback by the change in his tone. He hadn't seen this sort of intensity in him, not even in that first moment before their kiss under the tree. It felt like he was abandoning some sort of self-imposed restraint, and maybe he was afraid that he was doing it all alone, and not for himself.

It looked like it frightened him.

She put a soothing hand on his arm, and he seemed to calm down a little, from seeing her eyes go soft as she looked at him.

"All the time," she said, in a whisper that spoke of her own sense of desperation that she had no control over it either.

It was as if her words were a touchstone that offered him relief, and he sobered immediately, the wild look in his eyes disappearing. He wasn't alone in feeling overwhelmed by his emotions - and her calm admission told him she had come through her own process of working through them too.

So now that they were on the same page about it, he knew what the next step was, and wondered how soon they could get there. It was then that he clicked that she had already reached that stage, and that she had probably already decided how soon she was willing to get there.

It all came to him suddenly, her words, the things she had said to him in the throes of passion, which he didn't realise the significance of until now.

She was ready to go there, had been ready sooner than he had expected of her - and he finally understood she had been ready before he even thought of whether he was or not. He marvelled at her, at how quickly she knew her mind and her emotions - and how easily she accepted herself and what she wanted.  
She had given him hints. She had told him explicitly. And she had been patiently letting him set the pace. He felt like he was the one who need to be lead, when all along he thought he was taking the lead.

He was so caught up in getting things right he got in the way of just letting them happen. I am still my own obstacle, he thought.

Slow Taekwoon, Silly Taekwoon.

Lucky Taekwoon.

 


	7. Falling

If there ever was such a sensation as feeling your heart leap and plummet at exactly the same time, this was it.

Hongbin felt dread fall over him as he caught sight of Siana and Leo standing by the basketball court, their hands on each other. Although they were still, the intensity of their gazes told him that much was going on. He instinctively turned to Ken and put a hand on his arm, stopping him.

"You really want to play? I am feeling a little tired after last night."

"Why didn't you say so before we left? I changed clothes. I walked here." Hongbin couldn't help but glance over towards the two in the distance.

Ken leaned in conspirationally. "Is it because of the dream you had of Siana-ssi over there?"

Hongbin paled, his eyes wide. Ken smiled and patted him on the shoulder. "Don't worry, no one else heard you calling for her. With such longing. In your sleep. Before falling off the couch. I won't tell anyone."

Hongbin's mouth dropped open before he clamped his hand over it and squeezed his eyes shut in mortification.

"Tell anyone what?" Hyuk asked, bringing up the rear with the basketball he had fished out from under the bench.

Hongbin jumped, a desperate gasp escaping his lips as his eyes darted to Ken. Ken nonchalantly tugged at his jersey's sleeves, as if he were tidying shirt cuffs on a suit. He was James Bond, he was Man from U.N.C.L.E.

"Nothing young Hyukkie needs to know. Just an awesome secret between myself and the guilty party, Hongbin here."

"I'm not guilty of anything," Hongbin said weakly.

"Yet." Ken looked at Hyuk with great gravitas as he turned and slid past Hongbin.

Hyuk watched him go impassively, as Hongbin fidgeted with his hands, trying to find a goddam pocket to slip them into.

"Does he mean the bad dream that you had about SIana-ssi?" Hyuk asked, his eyes still on Ken.

"I think this is the bad dream, actually," Hongbin murmured, trying to take as deep a breath of air as he could, and failing.

"Was she mean to you? Did she try to kill you? Because you were out of breath and panting her name," Hyuk looked down at Hongbin, his customary pose the same, two hands primly holding each other at chest level, as he blinked and waited with a detestable patience. Hongbin could see that Hyuk knew exactly what kind of a dream he had had, and this was how he was teasing him.

"Anyone can have these kinds of dreams-" Hongbin started.

"About the only beautiful woman they have made friends with whom they took care of while the guy they were interested in was busy sorting out his personal issues. Hmmm. Sounds like second male lead syndrome, Hyungie," Hyuk finished philosophically.

"I've never really hit you before have I, Maknae?"

"I have borne the brunt of your cutting wit and excellent verbal sparring. My scars still heal, Sunbae-nim." Hyuk gave a little martial arts bow.

As usual, irritatingly and entertainingly funny, thought Hongbin, his soul dying inside.

"Which is why Athens," Hyuk continued, "seems so interesting to you all of a sudden. Hmmm, through observation I am beginning to understand that human psyche more and more, and also, to disbelieve the idea of rational thought overcoming the urges of the human heart-"

Hongbin gave Hyuk such a dead-eyed look of "shut up" that he ended abruptly.

"Ah, it's not that bad. Like you said, everyone has those dreams."

"Have you?" Hongbin asked tersely.

"Of course," Hyuk answered, cheerily.

"About Siana, who is in love with Leo Hyung?" Hongbin said.

"No of course not, that would be weird and inappropriate!" Hyuk answered, again cheerily.

Hongbin raised his arm and swiped at Hyuk ineffectively several times. Hyuk ducked and emitted a blood-curdling, high-pitched scream, which had everyone turn to look at them, including Siana and Leo.

Someone shouted at them in Greek with heated irritation. Hyuk covered his mouth in embarrassment as Hongbin lowered his arm.

"Oops! Sorry Hyung!" Hyuk never calls me Hyung, Hongbin thought.

He saw Siana and Leo look over, and then watched in horror as she came forward, shouting back at the guy in a tone just as irritable. As she crossed over towards them, Leo turned to follow, his face a mask. Oh shit, Hongbin thought.

Siana looked angry, her frown and her voice stern as she replied to the man's comments with vigorous arm movements.

"Wow," Hyuk said, distracted by the sight.

The man was in military uniform, his mouth a grim line. He started coming forward, leaving his cohort behind him.

Siana veered towards him, zipping up her jacket.

Hongbin realised with alarm that she could be in danger when he saw Leo quicken his pace. Ken, who was closest to the approaching man, put his hands up in a placatory manner, stepping forward to try to get between the guy and Siana.

In a surreal moment, he wondered what the Greek military thought about their men picking fights with girls, and that Ken Hyung should protect his pretty face above all. I wish I could laugh right now, he thought inanely.

Things seemed to come to a head, with everyone surging forward, trying to reach them in time - just as Siana and the man alarmingly reached out... and gripped each other in a fierce bearhug.

The boys slowed down in surprise as she pulled back to get a better look at the guy and touch his cheek.

"Is she crying?" Hyuk asked.

"Yeiasou Yiorgo, ti kaneis?" Siana asked the man, who kissed her cheek and took her in an even closer hug.

Hongbin looked around. The embracing couple were surrounded by four Korean strangers, one of whom was her love interest. And another of whom was himself.

Siana hugged back, then turned to introduce everyone, her arm around the man's shoulder.

"This is George. Panos' older brother," she said joyfully.

Hongbin forgot his thoughts for a moment and felt his own happiness surge. They knew each other? And this was my new best buddy's brother?

He, Ken and Hyuk simply enveloped George in a crowd hug, the whoops of congratulatory joy for being the brother of their friend Panos, and the sheer relief that it wasn't going to be a fight, making the hug boisterous and loud.

Siana was squeezed out of the foursome, and she leant into Leo's waiting arms as they watched them express their spontaneous love.

George laughed and called over his friend, who was hanging his head as if embarrassed by behaviour he was used to seeing.

Introductions were made, and the friend, Lukas, complimented Siana on being as crazy a cousin as George had made her out to be.

Leo could see the family resemblance between George and Panos now that they had been introduced. But a few moments ago he would not have clocked George as Panos' brother, nor even as a friendly stranger.

The rising panic he felt when he realised that Siana was making for a fight with the rather burly army man spurred him into a run at the last possible moment. But then Siana and George had embraced, and his anxiety disappeared under a plethora of mixed feelings. On the one hand, he was thoroughly relieved she wasn't in danger and also that she wasn't a closet maniac who liked to look for fights with strangers.

And on the other, he felt like he had been had. Well and truly.

It was a feeling he supposed he would have to get used to when it came to Siana. She had an impish streak that coloured her rather gentle side, making her unlike any girls he knew. Although there were jokesters among them, they put themselves out there as such, whereas Siana didn't. She rather hid that side of her, or at least, when it manifested, he didn't see it coming because she was so good at being genuine.

She's got the humour of an old man trying to mislead gullible youngsters - all seriousness and denials.

Like me, he thought, not sure whether that was a good thing.

Today's incident was all the more convincing because she had shown herself to be tough in the face of confrontation, and so he had thoroughly believed she was about to deck the man for giving Hyuk grief over his screaming.

And he found it more than a little hot when he thought that she was up for a fight.

Leo glanced at Hyuk, wondering what on earth had possessed him to shriek til the birds in the trees took off in fright. Hyuk was looking suitably embarrassed, but happy nevertheless that all had turned out to be a joke, and that George was someone they knew. Ken was saying how ready he was to throw a punch for Siana, which made Leo smile because even though he knew Ken had those intentions, it was likely that his scrawny wrists would get hurt on impact with George's square jaw.

They all turned to look at Siana, who was still leaning back against him, her hands holding his arms as he crossed them over at her shoulders. She smiled and praised Ken for his chivalry, joking that if he had really had to fight a stranger, she would have been glad to have known him, even if for such a brief time.

Leo noticed everyone laughed and looked at Siana except Hongbin, who seemed to be quite distracted, even though he was listening and half-smiling in response to the chatter. He supposed Hongbin might have been really affected by the possibility that Sians could get hurt, and may be just getting over the anxiety of it.

Leo wanted to speak to Hongbin, whom he knew had been there for Siana during some tough moments when she might have felt alone. Hongbin was also the first to be spurred into action when they had come across the vagrants looking like they were going to pounce on SIana and her father that night.

He regretted being so upset by the incident that he had failed to be the one to check on her after it had happened. Hongbin had done that, and he felt grateful that someone had been there for her - something he envied Hongbin for. But he know it was his own procrastination and inaction which lost him an opportunity to show her he cared. That Hongbin stepped in was simply a matter of decency.

Leo saw Hongbin notice him, and was surprised to see him react with a start. Leo tried to smile at him but Hongbin had looked away before he could, putting his hands into his pockets and turning as if to look at the people around them.

Siana's conversation with George changed to English so that the others could follow.

"How long will you be here for?"

"I have a few days. I go back to Athens on Friday, then Lukas and I will be back in Thessaloniki before the new year." George put a hand Lukas' shoulder.

Leo noticed Lukas still hadn't taken his eyes off Siana, even though she was in his arms. He felt Siana give his arms a squeeze, but he was getting agitated that Lukas was not hiding his appreciation of Siana. He could feel a tension seeping into his shoulders. He didn't like what was happening at all.

George looked up at Leo with a smile, then asked Siana, "New friend?"

Siana laughed and looked up at him too, but he was still eyeing Lukas. Her smile froze, imperceptibly, but George noticed and looked at Lukas too.

He tightened his grip on Lukas' shoulder and shook him. In Greek, he said gruffly, "You're embarrassing me and my cousin. Put your tongue back in. She's not here for your pleasure."

Leo was surprised to see Lukas blush crimson and look sheepish. He supposed Lukas was greener than he had thought, and didn't know how to hide his admiration for Siana. He watched him take a step back, head down. Then he saw George smile back up at him.

"Don't mind him, he still needs help feeding himself."

Leo nodded, letting a small smile crinkle the side of his mouth.

"Our little Siana is a big girl now, huh?" he smiled at Siana, who laughed.

"I'm the same as I was when I saw you last year, Yiorgo," pronouncing his name in Greek.

"No, sweetheart, not the same at all," George smiled at her, then Leo.

"Have you seen your mum yet?" Siana asked.

"We arrived before dawn so we waited here to surprise her on the way to church. She gave me a hug and told me to eat more. So now she is at the hotel, cooking. We're having dinner there - come join us, all of you!"

"Don't you think you should ask your mum first before you invite us all to eat the food she is making for you? She may want to speak to you in private about your lack of a wife and children."

George laughed. "When would that ever be a private conversation? It's okay, she said she will invite everyone anyway, Uncle too, I'm sure."

Siana looked up at Leo, then the others. Ken and Hyuk nodded vigorously, so she said yes.

"Okay, we'll be there," Siana said happily.

George smiled, then stopped for a moment, seeing something beyond the group, over Siana's shoulder.

"What time should we be there?" Siana asked. George snapped his attention back to Siana, his expression back to smiling.

"Come at eight," he said, turning to steer Lukas off, but not before glancing back over Siana's shoulder for the tiniest of moments.

**

Siana got ready quickly, locking up and running down the stairs to knock on her father's door. She and Leo had reluctantly parted ways, he more than her, as she was excited to go early to visit her aunt's kitchen and help with the preparations. They would see each other later, when he and the boys arrived for the dinner.

Mikhalis opened in a rush, his hair dripping wet as he buttoned his shirt.

"Why do we have to go so early, Ana?" he asked irritably, turning to go back into the flat. Siana bounced in after him, excited to get going.

"Awww don't you want to see everyone all dressed up nicely and celebrating George's return?" she asked excitedly.

Mikhalis rolled his eyes. "Like when he came back at Easter? Not really. Honestly, you go on ahead and I will bring the boys."

"You're already ready! Look, I'll dry your hair for you," she grabbed a the towel he had through across a chair and proceeded to rub his hair dry at whip speed. He protested, but before he could stop, she had pulled it away with panache, and he was surprised to find his hair was quite dry.

"How-?"

"I think it's a girl thing, we have different arm muscles," she said impatiently, dropping the towel on the chair, grabbing his jacket and ushering him out the door.

They walked to the hotel, which was a couple of parallel streets away, heading east along the shore. She remembered the last time she had come out this way, she was walking back home alone from that night at the club on the cliff. Well, she thought she had been alone. She had been lucky that Leo had come after her when she had walked alone out into the night. Her thoughts turned to the earlier part of that night.

It seemed like that kiss had only happened yesterday, but the night itself seemed so long ago. She turned to her dad.

"Has anyone found those two guys? The one I hit? What if he was badly hurt?"

Mikhalis shrugged. "If he had any sense in him he would go to a hospital. But if he's illegal or has a record, he may not want to do that."

"But-"

"Ana, he has been surviving for longer than the time he has known you. There isn't much we can do if he has disappeared. It's been a week, so if he hasn't collapsed from infection or pain, he is probably out helping his friend terrorise other people."

Mikhalis hugged her round the shoulder as they walked.

"Anyway, I'm more concerned about the crazy looking one. I've been trying to figure out whether they are just trying to survive together, or if one is the leader of the other."

They approached the hotel down a single-laned road and soon came to an open air carpark that sat right on the water front. There was a tiny strip of pebble beach where the water lapped gently against the stones, and the hotel faced the water and the glorious setting sun. Her uncle, or rather her grandfather, had purchased the land after the war and the family had developed it and had worked hard to make it a profitable family business.

At ten stories high, it was no small hotel, and the interior, though well-appointed, boasted a simplicity that suited less european tastes and went well with a younger, family crowd.

They walked through the double door entry and found the front lobby to be empty except for Panos, who was setting up for a band in the far corner.

Siana squealed, giving Panos a fright.

"Oh god! Are we having bouzoukia tonight?!" she asked breathlessly. She LOVED bouzoukia - greek mandolins and similar, banjo-like instruments that were reminiscent of the malay gambus. The music was middle-eastern, oriental and had a lot of pathos and sentiment to it, and there were many sorts of dances to dance, which she felt up for.

"My father wants to reproduce his shameless exhibition last year. We are afraid he wants to make it a tradition," Panos said drily, coiling up wires and setting them neatly by the chairs where the musicians would sit.

"All this for Yiorgos? Bah," Mikhalis said good-naturedly.

Panos laughed.

"No, it just seems that Mama thought Christmas could come early for all of us, since everyone seems to be free tonight. Family reunion."

"George asked all the boys to come along too - is that alright? They're getting ready to come here," Siana said. Panos and Mikhalis held up their hands together, giving her a look of "what kind of people do you think we are to turn away friends?" and then dismissively waving her away.

Mikhalis went to test the old upright piano that was to the side, facing the lounge. He ran trills across the keyboard, working his fingers to warm them up.

Panos came out from behind all the stage chairs and walked towards Siana. He turned and they watched Mikhalis playing for a moment.

"I wonder why he never wanted to perform?" Siana wondered out loud. Panos looked down at her.

"But he did."

"What?" Siana looked at him, intrigued. "I didn't know that!"

"Sure. He performed all the time, locally. He used to play here, and a lot in Arachova and Delphi. Just standards and golden oldies."

"Why did he give it up?"

Panos put a hand on her shoulder.

"He got married and had a baby and decided to compose instead." He smiled down at her as the enormity of what he had just said sank in. Tears came to Siana's eyes as she realised there was a history to her father that she had not been aware of, and the poignancy of knowing it hit her hard.

Panos hugged her, ruffling her hair.

"Don't be silly, he wanted to do so badly. I remember it, I was about 7 at the time, and Dad was upset because he had a hard time finding replacements from out of town," Panos said.

"But.."

"No buts, he made the best decision. He could spend time with you and made a lot more money," Panos let go of Siana and pushed her towards the kitchen.

"Too many crying women in the house, go help in the kitchen like a good girl."

Siana turned to kick him, but then slowly gave him a hug as she sniffed into his sweater. She pulled back and looked up at him, wiping her tears.

"Your mum is right. Who's going to have you if you talk like that?"

Panos laughed and put a hand on her face to push her away.

Siana stepped back, looking at him pitifully and shaking her head. Then she turned and trotted off to the kitchen as if nothing had happened.

She pushed through the heavy kitchen swing doors and walked into what looked and felt like a steamy sauna filled with large men and women in various states of undress. The heat had caused her aunts and uncles and distant relatives to strip down to their tees, leggings and shorts as they prepared stews and fried dishes for the dinner.

Most of the food had been finished, but the kitchen seemed like a cacophony of loud opinions and huffs. Her Aunt, Panos' mum Glykia, saw Siana and walked over, shaking her head as she gave her a sweaty hug.

"Yeiasou, Theia," Siana said, a smirk on her face.

"Hello my darling, how are you? Panos says you are very happy these days, hmmm?" Siana smiled, nodding with a twinkle in her eye.

"Aaaah, these are the best times of your life. How is your mother?" Siana was reminded that she needed to speak to her mother, to tell her about what was happening in her life. She glanced at the relatives crowding her kitchen, and saw Glykia shake her head again.

"Look at all of them trying to help me and getting in my way. They're trying to decide how to serve the food, as if I am not a hotelier, and this isn't my hotel!"

Siana laughed.

"Can I help you in any way?" She asked merrily as Glykia rolled her eyes.

Like her name, Glykia was a sweet woman with sparkling, cheery eyes and a way of handling all sorts of people. To see her stressed out by people who were trying to help signalled that she was nearing her threshold of tolerance.

"If you can drag any of them out of here that would help!" Glykia went back towards the deepest part of the kitchen

Siana called out to the bickering relatives, who looked up in surprise. They yelled at her in surprise and came forward, greeting her in Greek. Amidst loud protestations about why she hadn't come to visit, Siana admitted that she had been busy, and was already teaching dance on the weekends.

"She has a boyfriend!" Glykia called from the back, making at least a half dozen faces turn to her with avid excitement in their eyes.

"Who is he? What family is he from? Does he live nearby?"

Siana made a face at Aunty Glykia, who smiled at her sweetly and waved as Siana backed out of the kitchen through the swing doors.

"Wow, it's so nice and cool outside," she said, getting a few of them to follow after her.

"Pano, did you know about this?" One of her uncles-in-law asked him accusingly. Panos looked up from what he was doing and shrugged.

"Know about what?" Mikhalis asked from his seat behind the piano.

Siana cringed. She knew what was coming, but even worse than having to face this now, was the possibility that her relatives would do the same to Leo later.

"Our Siana has a boyfriend!"

Mikhalis looked at them as if he couldn't understand what they were trying to say.

"Do you know him, Mikhali?"

"Is he from Arachova?"

"Maybe Amfissa?"

"I think he's human, isn't that right sweetie?" Mikhalis said as he came out from behind his seat.

"Pshh! This is serious Mika, we need to know who this boy is. Do we know his family?"

Mikhalis put his hands up as he approached them.

"You can find out for yourselves tonight, because he is coming to dinner with his friends."

Siana watched the various faces change expression. It was like a comedy, she could almost predict their reactions already. The rellies turned to each other and then to her. She saw Panos and her father look at her with Mr Bean-esque expressions over their heads, and had to stifle a laugh.

"Well, why didn't you just say so, little thing?" they said accusingly.

Siana felt a little twinge of a an old feeling, that she was being looked at as an outsider who was trying to put people out. She knew that they couldn't help being who they were, but she realised that there was still a feeling she had of not quite belonging here in her extended family.

Then she saw the smiling faces of Panos and her father, and realised that she was being silly.

Those two were her family.

Her mum was her family.

Her friends were her family.

She looked back at the overly curious faces and smiled at them, nodding in agreement.

"Yes, I should have said it right from the start," she said agreeably.

They looked at her, a little deflated. They had nothing to fight after that, and their zealous tones dwindled. Suddenly she saw them as underdressed, sweaty old people standing in a hotel lobby. Mikhalis put his hand on someone's shoulder.

"If you go get dressed now, you won't miss his entrance later," he advised.

They nodded vigorously, beginning to argue as they shuffled towards the lift to go back to their rooms.

Mikhalis came over to put an arm around her shoulder as Panos shook his head and went back to sorting things on the stage.

Siana looked up at him, a tight smile on her lips. Mikhalis leaned over to whisper to her.

"Your skinny pale Korean and his five six-foot friends... Do you think they will get a fright?"

Siana giggled. She put a finger on her chin, thoughtfully.

"Maybe I should warn them not to wear any makeup."

Mikhalis laughed, nodding. THen he gave her shoulder a squeeze.

"Don't worry about them. Just be as natural and as free together as you would with me. I'll be the yardstick. Remember..."

Siana smiled up at him as they both said, "It's not like we're eating macaroni with them!"

**

Hongbin sat, fidgeting, on the couch he had fallen off earlier that day, as he waited for everyone else to get ready.

Opposite, Leo was slouched into the corner of the sofa, his legs crossed and his arms crossed over his knee. He was gazing into the fireplace, which had a small fire dwindling in it. Since they had returned the night before, Kkomae had shown everyone the finer points of keeping a fire ablaze, and each of the boys had taken various levels of interest in never letting the thing die.

So they had been burning wood for almost twenty four hours straight.

It seemed a waste since the days were not that cold down here in Itea at sea level, but Hongbin felt that the love of the experience was a worthy one to keep it going. They had even been taught to let the fire die down but keep the embers going so that when they left the house, the heat would keep until they returned to rekindle the fire again quickly.

The room felt unbearably hot to him, though Leo seemed to enjoy the furnace-like wave of heat emanating from the fireplace. Hongbin watched him close his eyes, looking just like his namesake, a large, lanky lion whose closed, upturned eyes were both pretty and menacing at the same time.

Hongbin felt like he needed to say something, but the very thing he needed to say was what he didn't want to say at all. He felt that he was betraying himself - that attraction, or whatever it was that had such a sudden hold on him, was rushing him, making him feel guilty over something he hadn't done yet.

Perhaps it was his straightforward nature, perhaps he was lovestruck. He didn't think it was the latter. He just had an overwhelming need to come clean. To Leo. About Siana.

Do I even care for Siana in that way? He thought, looking at Leo's peaceful basking in the fire's heat.

I care for her as a friend. As a person who has shown she cares for us too, personally. He sighed suddenly. How physical attraction suddenly entered into his thoughts about her, was beyond him. When had he crossed that threshold? Was he simply lonely, and had a sudden jealousy upon seeing his Hyung get involved?

Hongbin felt that seemed rational. Then, it would be explainable that he felt protective over Siana, since he had already been there for her when she needed someone.

There it was. Hongbin realised, calmly.

There was that seed of thought that had made him compare himself to Leo.

He had been there for her, when Leo hadn't. That thought, which although seemed true, was actually an inflated sense of self-importance which was colouring his view of the events.

Even though he had been there for her, it was as a friend, and it was coincidental. She hadn't sought him out, she hadn't asked for him to be there. And at the time, he entertained no such thoughts as those he had now. Furthermore, they were not yet together at the time, and she wasn't crying about Leo, but about something completely unrelated.

Looking back at it, Hongbin realised he had given himself a significance to Siana that he didn't really have.

This was the power that lust had over one's rational thought, Hongbin mused. Not that lust was all he had on his mind. No, it was an urge to care for, to protect someone. Perhaps that is just something I am ready for, and it just so happens that I am witness to the unfolding of a relationship between a person I love, and a person who represents someone I wish I could care for.

Perhaps I am finally ready for that in my own life.

All at once, something in him settled, and the low-level anxiety that had been plaguing him for hours, dwindled, and died.

Now he could see why, now he understood.

Suddenly, the heat didn't seem so intense. Suddenly, it felt like it was seeping into him rather than attacking him, and he could feel it relax his muscles, as gentle as a sigh.

"I have to thank you, Binnie," he heard Leo's soft voice as he spoke through lazied lips. He looked up to see Leo's intense gaze on him.

"Hyung?" Hongbin was surprised.

"You held Siana's hand for me while I got my act together. You helped her wait for me patiently." Hongbin was taken aback. Leo paused, a catch in his throat. But he never let his gaze waver. Hongbin realised he was holding his breath.

"You just knew what to do, when I was still trying to figure out what was happening. I could have missed my opportunities. But you helped keep them open for me, in trust."

Hongbin laughed a little, overcome by emotion. Leo had just acknowledged everything that he had, up until the last moment, been resenting his Hyung for.

He nodded, looking down. He realised it was fortuitous that he had come to his own realisation about Siana just in time, because if he had heard Leo's confession earlier, he may not have really heard what Leo was saying.

It was disarming to have his respected brother acknowledge him in this manner, and he felt that he owed him an honest reply.

"Hyung, I just happened to be there. Siana didn't need any help from me. But she is someone I care for. She is a friend, and someone I could love too."

He paused, wondering what Leo would think of that. He could see Leo absorbing what he said and nodding, understanding. It was relieving, to have spoken the truth without it having a hold on him. There was no longer an emotional attachment to the idea. It was just a simple fact. Siana was loveable, and Leo got what Hongbin meant.

"We all love her." He finished, simply.

Leo nodded, looking back into the fire. He sniffed, then sighed.

They sat there in companionable silence until they heard N shuffle up to them in his socks, with his boots in hand. He plopped neatly onto the sofa next to Hongbin and started putting them on and adjusting the laces.

"If you think about it, we're like those american debutantes. You know? About to be introduced to society!" N smiled his smirky tight-lipped smile at Hongbin.

Hongbin laughed. Of course, that was how N would put it.

"Itea is about to be educated about six useless city boys who made it in the world," he said, loosening and tightening his laces with neat precision.

Leo smiled, closing his eyes again against the warmth from the fire. He hadn't moved once, and he looked the picture of feline grace with his arms crossed over his crossed legs.

"Mr Sphinx over there seems overwhelmed by excitement. How about you, our Hongbin?" N slapped a hand on Hongbin's knee. Out of habit, Hongbin's hand came out and deflected easily. Then, also out of habit, N grasped that hand and hugged it close to his chest. Hongbin giggled. N surely had a way of turning everything around to be about him.

"I can see you are excited, just like me. But let's save our affection for the public!" Hongbin laughed, hearing Leo chuckle quietly. N always delivered his words in such a way that outsider wouldn't know he was being deadpan, playing up his role as the queen of the bunch.

The boys knew he was anything but, but they loved it anyway. And also enjoyed helping him dig himself deeper into his role, much to his chagrin.

 

Panos saw George come out of the lift in the lobby, freshly showered and changed, with Lukas following close behind. George beckoned to him and walked outside into the carpark, leaving Lukas to make his way towards the bar.

Panos walked out and joined him in the crisp evening air, and saw that he had a sombre expression on his face.

"What's up?" he asked without preamble.

"I saw something today which worried me," George said, staring out into the carpark. "I met Siana with her friends-" he began.

"Hey, her friends are cool, I told you already," Panos said with a frown. George turned to him irritably.

"No. As I was saying goodbye I noticed someone taking pictures of them."

Panos smiled, nodding his head.

"I can explain that. The boys are all part of a k-pop group, so maybe it was a fan who recognised them."

George shook his head.

"You already told me this. Fans... you can tell when someone is a fan. No. I knew this person. You know this person. It's that new guy we got at the club - you know, the one who is always badmouthing people on the job."

Stavros, their bartender, the one he had scolded that night at the club for not paying attention while on the job, playing with his phone.

He had been particularly annoying this last week, being impatient and wondering aloud about an early Christmas bonus. Panos was in half a mind to fire him, but there was no real reason to, and he knew that Stavros was the type to hold grudges and go telling stories to anyone who would listen. Already there was jealousy, not just of his family, even of him, for being young and successful in a small town where there was hardly anyone else who could compete with him. Stavros would find plenty of willing ears to listen to his version of events.

Panos was reminded of an incident when Stavros had been caught talking smack about their father, who had dropped in one day before opening time and confronted him for posting sarcastic remarks about his new work place, namely, their club.

Panos felt an old irritation surge. Despite his lack of prudence, the man was a good worker who seemed to be known for his bitchy attitude - and the clientele liked their cocktails served with a side of sour and bitter.

There were few people to be found in Itea and its surrounds who could replace him. He mixed drinks with panache and put on a show, which was its own entertainment act.

"Maybe he knows who the boys are?"

George looked at him doubtfully.

"He may know of them but I don't think he has the intentions of a fan. But the thing that worries me is... he was taking pictures of Siana." George looked at Panos solemnly. Panos absorbed this information with a growing anger.

What the hell was Stavros playing at?

"If you know his social media, you better check it. See what he is doing with those pictures. There is probably video too. Oh!"

George's eyes went wide as he remembered something.

"I forgot. Siana and I were acting like we were fighting. He could have filmed all that. God knows what the hell he wants it for."

Panos gasped.

"Hey, you could get into trouble for things like this! Were you still in uniform?!"

George nodded.

"Why didn't you call him over or take his phone or something? You're still his boss," Panos was getting more and more angry. Stavros had better not have posted any footage yet. George clapped a hand on his shoulder, pulling him close.

"Don't worry, we will have it sorted out before I leave on Friday. He may not have even done anything with it, just being a cowardly idiot or trying to make some waves."

"He could try to use it against you."

"Anyone can see we were just playing. We even hugged at the end."

Panos looked at his brother irritably.

"And if he doesn't show the ending? Come on, Yiorgo, it can look really bad. You should make a report, or talk to your superior about it. Why didn't you say something earlier? I can't go and find that asshole now that we have gues-"

"Panos, my man!" Panos stopped himself from cursing out loud at the interruption. Then he realised it was Hyuk who had called out from the road as they approached the hotel. He turned to see him and Hongbin coming up the small road, smiling at him.

He smiled and waved, turning to say briefly to George, "Let's fix this tonight, and sort out a new bartender before the weekend." He patted George brusquely on the shoulder before turning to walk towards the boys.

"You better warn them too," George said quietly as Panos reached them. George waved at them and walked back inside, looking for Lukas.

Panos greeted Hyuk and Hongbin with a tight smile, grasping their outstretched hands and pulling them close for a chest bump.

"You okay?" Hongbin asked Panos. Panos shook his head, spying Ravi and Ken coming up the road as well. Behind them he saw Leo, N and the two staff chatting as they brought up the rear.

"Something has come up, but I would rather tell you guys later. Let's not spoil the evening. Yet."

Hongbin looked back to see where Panos had glanced, and could see that it was Leo he was looking at. He turned back to Panos with concern, a frown wrinkling his forehead.

"What is it? Is it to do with Leo? Did something happen to Siana?"

Panos shook his head, putting up his hands and clapping them onto both their shoulders.

"Look, right now it's nothing, but I promise, I will tell you after dinner. Alright? For now, let's have some fun. My brother is back in town and we are celebrating the fact that he is leaving already!" he laughed, hoping to lighten the sobriety that hung in the air. Hyuk laughed along with him as Hongbin smiled. They all went inside, but Hongbin couldn't help feeling perturbed by Panos' agitated state.

 

The Comfort of Welcome

 

Leo walked into the hotel lobby to find it was already busy with people milling around the six long rows of tables set out mess-style to accommodate about ten people per table. They were arranged so that access to the space in front of the tiny stage was easy. There was a lot of space too, and he realised that that was for dancing.

The stage was already set and he could see about ten men all dressed in black, getting ready to play. There were three main players holding stringed instruments which looked like banjos and mandolins, an electric guitarist with two other acoustic guitars ready and set up for him to use as he wished next to him. On the other side of the three main players was a bass guitarist, and behind him a drum set stood waiting as the drummer adjusted the floor fan that was set up for him. A keyboard player sat next to the piano and he had a mic set up for him to sing, as did two of the main string players. Behind the electric guitarist, a percussionist stood surrounded by his various drums, bells and chimes as he checked them all for sound.

Ravi turned around to give him a look of surprise. There was very little amplification, only for the microphones and the electric instruments. The main instruments were not wired up but there were microphones set up to capture their acoustic sound. Leo supposed the main string players would be heard because of the sheer volume of the three of them playing all at once.

He saw Ravi point to a small banquet table that had been stacked with piles and piles of white crockery - side plates stacked as tall as they could go. He and Ken went up for further inspection, which was when Siana's father joined them and began pointing to the plate-laden table. Leo watched them listening to Mr Mikhalis, who was quite animated, picking up small baskets which had been filled with the flowerheads of red and white carnations. There were at least 20 such tiny baskets on the table along with the dozens of plates stacked high. He saw Mr Mikhalis list up the skirt of the table and the boys react when they saw that under it were more baskets, neatly stacked and ready to replenish supplies later.

The tables were laden with bowls of salads, cheese, piatellas of roast lamb legs, roast chicken and grilled fish, all surrounded by mounds of pasta, steaming plates of cooked vegetables and pots of stew. Loaves of bread that were almost sliced through were placed straight on the table top next to stacks of glass tumblers and carafes of wine.

After the initial awe of seeing such a splendid spread, Leo realised that more than a few heads had turned, some faces looking a little hostile, some openly curious and others nonplussed - the usual reaction they seemed to attract when they were noticed as a group.

He saw N wave at them cutely out of the corner of his eye and would have shaken his head if some of the crowd hadn't waved back.Spontaneously, N and those people stepped towards each other to shake hands and speak to each other without understanding. He was always surprised by how easily N plowed through awkward situations.

I suppose because he is the kind to wave cutely without a care, while I am the kind who would judge him for doing so, Leo thought to himself as he saw N being dragged towards a table where someone was offering him a drink already. He turned to check where Kkomae and Min Seok were, and found them crowding around Hongbin and Hyuk, who were already surrounded by a set of matching aunties and grandmas.

Everyone seems to be getting some love, and here I am, not even sure what to do with my hands, Leo thought, wanting to put them into his pockets but not wanting to look as if he was uncomfortable, or disinterested. They hung awkwardly by his side until he clasped them together at his crotch. Weird but comfortable, he thought.

He felt an old familiar feeling come over him. He wanted to walk up to someone, listen in, join in, take part. But he dreaded being unnoticed, or worse, unwanted, or bothersome. He felt silly and irrational, but the feeling was real and so deeply ingrained it sometimes had this paralysing effect on him. He scanned the room, telling himself that none of the boys actually went looking to get involved in people's business, but people had approached them to get them involved.

He caught a look at himself in a large mirror hanging in the lobby. Although he wasn't upset, he looked like he was frowning. I'm not frowning, though, he thought, tilting his chin up. He sighed, raising his eyebrows. He didn't really know how not to look like he was frowning without smiling inanely. He looked over to Ravi and Ken, thinking he should walk there since Ravi had looked at him earlier. They could talk about the musical set up.

He took a step, almost knocking into a short lady bearing a large heavy pot that was obviously hot. She tutted, muttering to herself as she hurried on. He sidestepped the person coming after her, almost knocking over the christmas tree which he hadn't noticed earlier.

He looked at it accusingly. It was huge. How had he not noticed it was there?

He stepped away, treading on a large man's foot. He immediately turned to apologise as the man put a hand out to stop him from knocking into someone behind him.

Across the room, Panos stood watching next to Siana as she gasped in horror. He leaned in to say, "Are you sure about him?"

Siana laughed and smacked him as she started towards Leo through the crowd, her laughter bubbling up as she watched him trying to regain some composure.

She was still giggling when he finally turned towards her and saw her. She felt her pulse quicken, and the laughter in her died down. He looked lost for a moment, and then when he realised she was coming for him, she saw him inhale sharply, his eyes boring into hers. There was a moment of relief that she was there, which turned quickly into something else.

He looked at her like she was the loveliest thing he had ever seen. And then, as if he was about to consume her with the fire in his eyes.

She slowed, her initial joy and mirth disappearing under the heat of his eyes. She felt blood rising in her cheeks, and she felt herself being pulled towards him, as if she was falling into his gaze.

How had he gone from awkward to this in an instant? He held out a hand towards her as she reached him, and she took it and pulled herself close, all the while never breaking eye contact. She could feel him hesitate, unsure of their situation. After all they were in a roomful of her family.

Siana put a hand on his chest and tilted her face up to give him a soft, breathless kiss on the lips, pulling away quickly and looking up at him with a shy smile.

He supposed now that there was no question as to what they were to each other, to anyone who saw that. It suddenly seemed a waste of his energy to wonder how he looked to anyone, or whether he fit in well enough. All that mattered was how Siana felt about him, and how she was welcoming him into her life and family.

She held his hand and pulled him towards the stage where her dad was seating Ravi and Ken, and beckoning to the others across the room to come and sit down too.

Mikhalis turned and greeted Leo with a warm smile, patting him on the back as he showed him a seat next to Ravi. He leaned over their chairs, wishing for them to enjoy the dinner and to feel welcome. Siana sat down next to Leo and smiled up at Hyuk and Hongbin who had come over to take their places.

Eventually everyone was seated, eating and drinking, and the band began playing.

The music was oriental, which Leo could recognise, but there were elements that he found unusual, like the sound of the bouzoukia and the way they were being played.

He and Ravi were surprised with the unusual time signature of some of the songs, and were trying hard to figure it out, counting aloud. Siana on the other hand, felt the rhythm naturally, not because she was a student of music, but because she had grown up knowing it. Many of the songs had a fast 1212123-1212123 structure, and they were intrigued by its effect. It seemed to have a go-go-wait effect on the feel of the songs, and they could see the audience becoming excited by the music as the dinner was finishing.

The musicians were committed to bringing out a feeling of celebration, and by the time dessert plates were being cleared, there were already a few dancers on the dance floor.

"This is just the start. They're only playing the popular happy stuff. Before the night ends, the true spirit of the Greeks will emerge," Panos shouted to them from the next table, with a smirk.

Hongbin asked Siana from across the table, "What is the true spirit of the Greeks?"

She smiled, and said, "Greeks have always had a romantic idea that they are wanderers in the world, uprooted from home and always missing their beloved whom they left behind. Whether it is a woman, a parent, or just the motherland."

George stood and came over, holding out a hand out to Siana.

"Ella, koukla mou, pame na chorepsoume," he said. Come, my sweet doll, let's go dance.

She squeezed Leo's arm and stood up, just as the music turned more traditional, slower. The crowd let out a whoop of happiness, and the boys were surprised to see ten people come up and hold hands, forming a circle.

Siana looked back at Leo and the boys, hoping they would enjoy watching the traditional dance that was about to happen.

 

Have ME

 

They had expected to join in the dancing to the modern music, but as they got up, the band started a traditional song, which everyone seemed to be waiting for. Not everyone could dance to pop music, but everyone knew how to dance their traditional dances in Greece. It was ingrained into their bodies through every school event and community get together.

Siana took her place amongst the people who had come up - besides another cousin of hers, she was the only girl. She was familiar with some greek traditional dances, and liked this one, which was the tsamiko, traditionally danced by men only. George, having come up to dance at just that moment, was immediately ushered to the top of the line, to be the lead dancer.

The tsamiko was a very masculine dance, requiring good physical ability and grace. Rather than following a set of fixed steps, it was one that allowed the lead dancer to improvise a little - because it was much more about the beauty and strength of the male form in action than it was about the celebration of the dance. The others were his support, and stood in line, holding each others' hands and following him as he moved slowly in a circle. Often, the lead would make stunning jumps into the air, scissoring his legs and slapping his foot before he landed. Sometimes, he did a graceful balancing act, using all the muscles in his body to control himself as he lowered almost to the ground before coming back up again.

Usually, there was an order to who danced first, but his father, Uncle Stratos, let him take the lead while he himself took the supporting role. The man next in line often had to bear the most weight of the lead dancer, holding him only by the hand or fingers as he bent low or did slow turns on his feet, almost kneeling, almost touching the ground.

Siana could see George get a little emotional that his father had given him the place of honour, and she felt a well of emotions rise up in her chest too. She was always in awe of the power of dancing over people - especially traditional dances or music that affected the community. She glanced at Panos, who had taken a place further along the line towards her, and he nodded to her with a gentle smile on his face.

George was much older, a little shorter than Panos but fit and manly, and in his black dress pants, white shirt and loosened tie, looked very masculine and handsome as he took a table napkin in each hand, offering one to his father to hold with him.

The music started, and George began taking his steps, to the sound of whistling and catcalling coming from the tables. A few people got down on one knee to clap and cheer him on, as he advanced and began pulling the line in a slow circle.

The boys at the table were leaning forward, some taking video footage and pictures, others simply watching in awe. Leo couldn't help watching George as he pivoted on his toes, crouching down and swerving around under the napkin he held with his father, which allowed him to turn easily whilst putting his weight on his father's arm. He came out of the turn and straightened up, to applause from his family.

Leo glanced at Siana, who seemed to be very taken with the dance, and was somehow affected by it. He realised that the family were watching George's performance as if they were all witnessing a rite of passage, engaging on a significant level that made them very proud of him.

He suddenly leaped high into the air, his legs scissoring over each other so that his leading leg landed first, but not before he slapped the foot of his following leg which had come up from behind him. He repeated the move twice more in succession, always landing quietly and with a sort of grace that bespoke his athleticism.

The cheering was constant, and he could hear them shouting "Oppa!" which sounded like their Korean word, except the emphasis was on the first, and not the second syllable. It seemed to be a word of encouragement, rather like their "fighting!".

He felt someone sit down next to him, and looked to see it was Mr Mikhalis, who nodded at him, looking a little moist in the eyes.

"They're good boys, we are very proud of them!" he shouted to Leo over the music. Leo smiled and nodded, looking back to see Panos come over and take his turn at the lead, letting George be his supporting man. Although sprightlier than George, his dancing didn't have the same gravitas as the older brother's did, perhaps because this was a farewell of sorts for him, even though temporary.

The dance ended and there was an enormous surge of cheering and people enveloping George and his father for tearful hugs.

The band leader said a few words over the microphone, and Leo was surprised to see a few women stand, mostly the matriarchs of the family, but also a few shy teens and kids. The only other women were Siana and another girl who had both danced with the men.

He saw Siana listen to the speaker, then look around apprehensively before turning to walk off the floor - but she was waylaid by a group of older women, who insisted she stay on to dance.

The music began, just the bouzoukia, a vibrant and middle eastern sound that was quickly joined by the percussion, and then the drums. The crowd was ecstatic, the women raising their arms and the men whistling.

He heard someone shout in a deep and throaty voice "Accchhh", which sounded so full of yearning he couldn't help looking to see who it was. He saw an older lady, seated and unable to dance, with her arms up and her face a sad smile. She was swaying, looking up at a young kid who grabbed her hands and swayed along with her.

He didn't know the song, nor what it was about, but he could see it had an immediate effect on the crowd, whether from nostalgia or from its meaning.

Then the vocalist began singing, and it was unlike any vocal presentation he had heard. The man sang deep in his throat, as if he were on the verge of crying. He gave little flourishes at the end of his phrases, but mostly it was the quality of the hoarseness in his voice that was enthralling. He felt it was at once deeply sad and yearningly erotic.

He looked around the room, and saw the women dancing, some with more abandon than others, some elegantly, some almost trashily. They were twisting their hips, rolling their bodies, using their hands to draw tendrils and corkscrews in the air. It was an erotic dance, but all the women of all ages were doing it. It seemed to be for the male eyes, but it also seemed to be for each other, or for themselves.

He could see grandmas encouraging the younger kids to let go and feel the music, giving it an innocent exploration of their bodies and music. Then he saw the teens trying too hard, being too self-conscious, but getting encouragement from their mothers, to experiment til they found their style. He watched, intrigued, as the older ladies of the house, with their mothers' bodies and tired frames, come to life with the minimum of effort, dancing with the experience of years of loving and caring and doting. He felt particularly moved by them, they had a dignity and grace that imbued their sensual moves with a world of meaning. He could see yearning, sadness, life, celebration.

He glanced around the table, and could see the various reactions of his brothers, some a little more taken aback than others, some trying to hide their curiosity and excitement, some relaxed and absorbing the atmosphere with a kind of knowing.

Then he realised he hadn't seen Siana, and felt his pulse quicken and his gut twist with a dull ache. He wanted to see her. He wanted to see how she was responding to the music.

He remembered that he had already seen her do something like this when she thought she was alone, without an audience.

Now, she was in full view of everyone, and he was there.

He was her audience.

He searched, almost afraid to see what he would find.

There, he saw in the thick of the crowd, her long hair which shimmered as she flipped it and turned to face the front.

And looked straight into his eyes with such a burning look of desire he gasped.

Then she was gone, swallowed up by the moving women, and all he had left was his breathlessness and something a bit like pain in his chest.

 

We Agreed

 

Siana had danced the tsifteteli almost all of her life, at family and community gatherings whenever she was in Greece, as well as for events where she was paid to help hype up the crowd along with other dancers. She did it with a smile, often types making it celebratory, even though depending on who was dancing it, it could range from being very sedate to being very salacious.

But when she heard the band leader announce the song they were going to sing, she got scared.

She had always danced for herself, or for the crowd. She had never danced for Someone.

And now she had someone to dance for - him - and it felt like it was going too fast.

When her aunts and relatives saw her balking, they practically barricaded her way off the floor, with their arms, with their looks.

"Where do you think you are going?"

"Now you have someone to dance for and you want to sit down? Psshh!" hissed someone, she didn't know who.

"A dancer with that body and you want to sit this one out? Makes me so mad!" "This is what this song is for."

"The sweetest time of your life, don't waste it."

Siana smiled at them, shaking her head. She felt grateful that they were looking out for her, teasing her. But this was something a little bigger than she had ever dealt with.

It was something very private and precious to her which she would be putting out there, even though she had danced these moves many times, on display for all to see.

She knew she could just see it as a performance, as another stage - just like Leo would be able to see it just as a performance or stage. He and the boys would surely understand that there was a personal side of oneself that didn't appear during a performance. that maybe, what she was about to dance for all to see, didn't mean anything more than a few moves designed to stir up some sort of appreciation for the performance.

Only thing was, she didn't see this as a performance. It was something that would give a bodily expression to the real feelings she was having for a real person - and whether he understood that would colour the way he reacted.

He might not see it as an honest expression, but just for show, for the evening's celebration, to be a part of the family's party. She would feel vulnerable putting herself out there if he didn't receive her message for what it was.

But then she couldn't do it without being honest. She couldn't just do it for show - it suddenly felt that doing so would made a mockery of the ecstatic, heady feeling of infatuation, of head-over-heeliness, of desire, that she felt for him.

The music started, and with the first emphatic notes from the singer, a shiver ran through her, raising the hairs on her neck and arms. It felt as if something was decided, and she couldn't help but go along with it.

The song was a traditional folk song, seemingly innocent, but actually rife with the sexual tension between two people in a conservative world. It only had a few lines of lyrics which repeated back and forth, almost like a nursery rhyme - but coupled with the yearning, plaintive vocal style and melody, it became a song about the urgent ardour of two lovers in their physical courtship.

The song was called Sala Sala. Sala was the Greek word for living room, but could also mean a cafe-type setting where people mingled. It sounded like it was talking about marriage, but it also had other sexual connotations, and these all served to make Siana's body charge up with a rising heat.

 

_In the living room, we talked it out_

_You will take me and I will take you, we agreed._

_You will take me and I will take you, we agreed._

_In the living room, we talked it out._

 

Siana closed her eyes, letting her body move. She was in the throng of the crowd, she knew she was hidden from everyone but those on stage. The words, they seemed to be such intimate whisperings between two people disguising their intentions with normal conversation.

The singer's voice was guttural, almost growling and husky as he sang, and when he finished the last sentence, he yelped, letting go of the passions that had stirred up, as the bouzoukia took over again with that highly recognisable opening riff. She opened her eyes slowly, taking in the women around her, who were in their own world. Some acknowledged her, some ignored her, all of them were intent on the feelings that were coming up for them, memories of being loved, or wishes to be loved.

Men and women alike were whistling and making catcalls from the tables, all of them adoring the display on the dance floor. She heard someone exhale "aaaachh!" out loud, and it sounded like the pain of a beautiful agony that hurts the soul, but that you would never willingly let go of.

She imagined Leo, unawares, watching them all without realising what significance this moment had for her.

You have all but said it out loud, Siana, she thought. He has already seen you do worse anyway, what would it matter for him to see you wiggle your butt on the dance floor now?

Because it's not just dancing, she thought. It's a wish. It's a call.

Come and have me. Come and take me.

At that moment, she found him, his pale face shrouded by that familiar glower. His eyes had already found her, and they glinted in the darkness as their gazes locked.

In that instant, she could have sobbed from the need she felt for him. She felt as if her body was not hers, but his, and the feeling took her so suddenly she pulled back, frightened. It was overpowering, and it felt like it was a deep and dark part of her soul and body which could never be filled.

She sensed rather than saw her father sitting next to him, and felt like she couldn't continue with the dancing. She couldn't have that showing in her face for all to see.

Though she knew Leo had seen it.

It was all too raw, too intense. She turned, but not before she saw him respond to her, not before she saw in his face a reflection of what she felt: desire, vulnerability and fear.

She continued dancing, but under cover of the crowd. She looked outward, focusing on the others around her, letting herself enjoy the dance, all the while dreading facing everyone once the music stopped. She felt hot, her cheeks burning. She edged out towards the tables, wanting to get out of the thick of things.

The singer began the last verse, and the crowd surged, some of the men joining in as well.

 

_Never black, never white, never red_

_If you asked me for my heart, I would give it to you_

_If you asked me for my heart, I would give it to you_

_Never black, never white, never red_

 

She felt the sound of the guitars wash over her, the words taking her by surprise.

They urged her, they called out to her.

She had only ever entertained the idea that she could be with him for a while. But he had asked for more, and she had agreed, not really knowing how it would all work out.

But now, with desire like a fire in her body that had been stoked into flames, she felt the seduction of love calling to her, asking her to let go, to let it wash over her like the warm sea, and pull her into oblivion.

She looked up, and found him again, this time he was standing, had moved back away from the table to be alone. He watched her with an intensity she found mesmerising. She couldn't break eye contact, his gaze was searching, hungry, black with want.

She heard the words singing in her head, and in her heart, she answered the call, returning his look with her own yearning gaze.

_If you asked me for my heart, I would give it to you._

 

**

 

Stratos sidled over and sat next to Mikhalis, who was now sitting alone. He nudged him conspirationally.

"So, will you do it? For old times' sake?"

Mikhalis smiled at him, then nodded. Stratos laughed deeply and slapped him on the back. Then he turned to look up at Leo, who was standing and moving back out of the way of the other tables, his eyes on the dancefloor.

"So..."

Mikhalis looked at him expectantly, taking a sip out of his tumbler of retsina.

Stratos shrugged, looking over at the dancefloor, then looking back at Leo again, then back at Mikhalis.

Mikhalis regarded him with a smirk.

"Yeeeees?"

"Nothing. I have nothing to ask you about Siana and all her new friends!" Stratos pretended to strangle Mikhalis, who took it goodnaturedly.

The music changed had ended, and now the band was playing a rousing traditional number, with everyone joining in to dance the kalamatiano.

Stratos smiled, then looked at Mikhalis carefully. Oh no, here it comes, Mikhalis thought.

"So how is Jenny? Have you heard from her? Do you keep in touch?"

Stratos asked him this almost every time they met, and Mikhalis' answer was always the truth: No.

He thought he couldn't bear to repeat himself, but he was feeling the sentiment of the evening, After all, he had already agreed to Stratos' prior request, and was feeling more than ready to fulfil the promise he had made.

"I miss her. Especially when Siana visits. And now Siana has found someone, I feel myself alone, even though she is here with me. Even more than when she is not."

Stavros looked at him, a little taken aback. Mikhalis smiled back as he held up his drink again, his eyes shining. He wasn't going to cry, but he was feeling the melancholy that he knew was going to colour the rest of the night for him.

Stratos shook his head, and exhaled a loud "Aaach" before taking a swig of his drink as well. They both turned to look at the two squashed circles of relatives trying to dance the sprightly kalamatiano without hurting themselves.

Mikhalis couldn't see Siana. He was hoping she was feeling happy and safe and wanted in Leo's arms. He was happy that she had chanced upon romance here where he could see her happiness blossom, and was very pleased that she had chosen someone he liked and respected - but more importantly, seemed to care for her despite his non-demonstrative nature.

Mikhalis thought about his own courtship of Siana's mother. People don't realise what strengths and weaknesses they have in them until they become part of a couple. Things they used to be proud of themselves for suddenly seemed trivial or time-consuming. And other parts of their character which they never thought they had in them, surfaced to meet the same in the other person.

It was as if proximity, or love, or fate or whatever - brought out the best and worst in each other. Your partner became your mirror, whether you liked it or not.

And in my case, he thought sadly, I didn't recognise my own loneliness - so I never saw hers. Mikhalis felt a sudden stab of deep regret, such that he had never felt before, not even at the height of their antagonism toward each other just before they finally split.

It was all here, right here in my hands, and I let it all go as if I didn't know what treasure I held.

Mikhalis looked down, feeling a strange emotion rising up inside him. He sniffed, blinking away tears. It had been a decade since their divorce. What was it that was triggering all this feeling?

He realised it was partly from the high emotion of the night, partly from the drink, partly from the promise he had made to Stratos and the anticipation of what he was about to do - and partly because he was seeing himself and Jenny in Leo and Siana. Of course, he and Leo were musicians, and there was a worry that history might repeat itself.

But he could see himself in Siana very much, a little smitten, a little unsure, a little new to love - which was how he had been with her mother.

He didn't know it then, but he was immature and had no real understanding of what it took to love someone.

He tried very hard. He gave up many things, worked hard for his family... not knowing that, while that was good for something, it wasn't good for his lonely, isolated wife. He couldn't understand, couldn't compute when she said he didn't have to do any of those things, that he could continue to be who he was, do what he wanted to do.

Jenny tried to tell him, but the simplicity of her demands just confused him more. Just love me. Be with me.

He saw the repetitive and tedious nature of childrearing as drudgery, and began to pull away. Her simple requests became too demanding, too intrusive.

The regret he felt that he had missed all his chances to see Siana's smiles and heartbreaks and Jenny's tiredness, happiness and sadness... all served to stoke his melancholy.

Now that he had a shared a little with Stratos, he felt that he had been heard, and that a little of the evening's elation was beginning to seep into his bones. He stood, taking a deep breath, and walked forward to find a spot to wait next to the band.

The lead player nodded at him, then turned to indicate to the band that MIkhalis was at the ready.

Before too long the music ended, and the leader gestured to him to come up on stage. MIkhalis came forward, standing on the dance floor in front of them.

As he took the mic, Stratos wolf-whistled loudly, yelling "Your health, Brother!" and causing everyone to turn and see Mikhalis getting onstage. There were gasps and yells of celebration.

Mikhalis faced the crowd, looking at all the smiling faces, some of them a little teary. He couldn't find Siana.

"Pou eisai, Siana mou?" He asked. Where are you, my Siana?

He saw her step forward from the edge of the crowd, her face smiling, surprised.

He spoke to her in Greek.

"My daughter, my baby. You are my blessing, my grace. And I want you to have happiness and kindness in your life."

He saw her eyes fill with tears as she listened. He saw Leo a little away from her, watching her with a deep curiosity, and something else.

A man in love?

Mikhalis felt heartened by the sight, and turned to cue the players.

He put the mic down, preferring to free his hands, and stood straight in the centre of the dance floor, surrounded by his family, and the one he loved most.

He paused a moment, stilling his breath. Then, he began to sing.

 

_Do not pity me, send me away tonight_

_As if I'm a wildflower, cut me and my life_

_I started my journey naked, I travel alone_

_My home is the road, and pain is my song_

_Send me away without pity, don't fear for my own_

_If it should snow or if it rains, this wildflower will endure_

 

The players joined in with perfect timing as he ended his song. He blew Siana a kiss and walked towards her, shaking his head when he saw her tears, wiping them away. He kissed her forehead and embraced her, and they swayed to the music as the band leader took over singing the rest of the song.

 

**

 

Leo stepped back, watching Siana and her father embrace after he had finished singing.

He didn't understand the lyrics, but he understood the singer.

Mikhalis' voice was rich and strong, but he sang with such a deep sadness that Leo couldn't help but understand him. He sang about love, and all the things about love that can make one sad. Leo didn't need to know the words to know that.

Her father had laid his soul bare and Siana was touched.

There was no place for him in this picture right now, so, he stepped back.

He found his way back to his table and sat down next to N, who had been watching from the edge of the crowd too. He now sat with his head bowed, his hands together in his lap.

Leo put a hand on his shoulder, and was startled to see N look up with tears in his eyes.

"What's the matter?"

N sniffed and blinked away the tears. He shrugged, smiling. Leo guessed he had been moved by the music, and by the connection Mikhalis and Siana had made.

Next to him , Ravi and Ken were quiet, looking out at the crowd, observing.

Leo looked around to find Hongbin and Hyuk still watching as the crowd began to disperse and the musicians readied for the next round. The music started, heavy, not too fast nor too slow.

He saw a swarthy older man, the one who had supported Siana's cousin when he had danced earlier, come up to the dance floor with his arms raised, his face a mask of sorrow over a small lingering smile.

Several other men knelt before him, clapping their hands in support.

At first he swayed to the music, snapping his fingers to the beat. Leo realised he couldn't keep a count of the music. Again, it was in a strange time signature, and it took him a moment to figure out the rhytm. He glanced at Ravi, who looked at him, perplexed. Mutely, they tried to follow the rhythm, looking at each other for cues as to how it went. When they finally figured out the count, they gave each other looks of surprise. Leo had come across strange time signatures in his studies, but experiencing the music in this setting gave it a life he never sensed sitting in classrooms.

The music, and the dance, seemed heavy, ponderous. Grave. But because of the odd extra beat, it felt like at every phrase of music, there was a deep sigh, a rest, a pause.

And by the look on the dancer's face, it was meant to convey the darkness, sadness and loneliness of life.

But, rather than being depressing, it seemed to be uplifting. Dancing made the dancer and his onlookers feel their sadness, live it, then let it go.

And even though there was only one dancer on the floor, it seemed as if everyone was experiencing a communal catharsis together.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Hongbin turn to come and join them, followed by Hyuk.

Hongbin's face was sombre, though Hyuk seemed enthralled by the atmosphere and music. They were all coming back together, and Leo felt as if every one of his brothers had experienced something new to them this night.

As they joined the table, Leo sat down next to N. He glanced around to check on Siana, and saw her standing behind Mikhalis,his arm around her shoulder as they watched the dancer together. She was still teary, but her face, rather than sad, seemed resigned, almost peaceful.

Suddenly she looked at him, her wet eyes like pools of soft vulnerability. She smiled softly, leaning against her father's shoulder as she did so.

Her look was so open, so clear of any shyness or inhibition. She just wanted to see him, that was all, and she looked at him as if to etch his image into her brain.

Leo looked at her back, a quiet peace settling within him. HE had no thought of the past, nor of the future. He was here, now, just being with Siana.

He was happy.

"My father is dancing the zembekiko. We are all very happy it isn't the tsifteteli like last year!" He heard Panos' voice as he sat down in front of him, obscuring his view of Siana.

Leo smiled at Panos as he continued, speaking to Hongbin in particular.

"It's just free dancing. Expressing the sadness of life. Love, tragedy, loneliness. Separation. Homesickness. The good stuff. The feelings!" Panos laughed, although Leo saw his eyes grow wet.

He realised the Greeks, or at least, this set of Greeks, kept their emotions high, up near the surface, ready to come spilling out, as if they were necessary to add sweetness to life.

And even the happier emotions were tinged with sorrow, or tragedy, or bitterness - and it made the happier emotions taste even sweeter.

Although he came from a society that encouraged tamping down of one's emotions, their industry necessarily required of them to bring those emotions up, and if they couldn't, to at least act like they were doing it, and well.

He glanced at N, who had succeeded in reigning back his emotions and was now listening, though still sniffly, to Panos with interest. Although N allowed himself to feel his emotions sooner than all of them, none of them could boast that they could ever have true control over them. They were in this business because they all had something deep inside them that they wanted to express, even their often seemingly emotionless and intellectual Hyuk.

Tonight, it was as if they had all been drinking at the same well, and had come away a little affected, a little touched.

He saw Panos suddenly change, go business-like, as he spoke to them all around the table.

"I need to speak with you all. My brother George noticed today that one of our employees was taking footage of you all today in the playground. He is worried that you looked like you were fighting. It's a worry because he was in uniform, but we will be talking to our staff tonight. I just wanted to let you know, because this is a concern for you. I want to handle it today, and I want to assure you that we will take care of it."

Leo saw N immediately perk up. "What fighting?"

Hongbin explained what had happened, and it was soon clear to N that no fighting had actually occurred. Leo saw Ken explaining to Ravi, who was the only other one absent that afternoon.

Although Leo could see that there would be an issue for George, he didn't feel overly concerned for their sake, not the way Panos was. But he saw N's face turn very grave as he listened to Hongbin. N looked at Panos, who looked back at him in all seriousness.

"Will you try to get the pictures?" N asked.

Panos nodded.

"We have had some issues with him before. He could be mad at George. But I wonder if he has had any encounters with you guys, especially that night when you came to club?"

"How would we know who he is?" Hongbin asked. Panos turned to him.

"You may remember the bartender? We left the bar to get more privacy because he was listening to our conversation. Remember?"

Hongbin remembered alright. He didn't want to continue his conversation because he felt that even in the loud club, he was too close for comfort.

Leo's eyes widened as he remembered something which had irked him, though he hadn't thought much of it at the time. The bartender had touched him whilst serving his drink. That could happen of course, but he had felt it was more of a caress than an accident.

At the time, he had brushed it off, having had many similar encounters from all sorts of people during his life as an idol.

"You think he was filming?" N asked. Panos shrugged. "We presume so."

"Us? Or George?" asked Leo. Everyone turned to him. It was a question that seemed to change the tone of their conversation.

Suddenly, they saw the bartender as someone with intent, not just a passerby who happened to catch a scene on camera.

Panos shook his head.

"We need to make sure we get that footage. He could edit it. He could discredit my brother. He could reveal your whereabouts. Your privacy could be compromised. Your security." Panos said, simply.

"Will you let us know what happens later? N asked, before thinking of something else. "Should one of us go with you? Our manager?"

Panos shook his head.

"Let's keep this as separate from you guys as possible. My brother has already informed his superior and has been asked to standby to return to Athens. We will see what happens later. But," Panos stood, smoothing the creases in his pants, "please enjoy the rest of the night. You are very welcome here, friends!"

He nodded to them as he turned away, leaving them all looking around at each other at the table.

Leo frowned. The night had started with a promise, but now seemed to be ending with a threat.

He looked back at Siana, and suddenly felt as if their heated, shared connection when she was on the dance floor, had happened ages ago. The pull of that moment, the sheer attraction towards her that had brought him around the room to meet her, had been muted by the sudden outpouring of expression that her father had made.

But now, that simmering, molten attraction seemed to evaporate into the air.

In its place, concern.

Dread.

Although he had wanted desperately to be with Siana for the rest of the night, he could see that this was a moment where parting ways, even just for the night, was necessary.

She, because she needed to be with her father right now.

And he, because he needed to be with his brothers.

Although Panos seemed to think this was all about George, Leo felt a mounting, sick feeling in his gut that this was not about George at all.

 

**

 

Ravi recognised the song Mr Mikhalis was singing.

It was the song Siana had been playing inside her apartment the day he went looking for Leo, who had instead found him eavesdropping on her outside her door in the stairwell.

No wonder Siana had reacted so strongly to her father singing - the song resonated with her somehow, even if only on a musical level. Ravi was sure the lyrics were very powerful, perhaps even on a personal level for Siana, not just from a poetic point of view. He was intrigued by the unknown words, and wanted to find out more about what had triggered this reaction between the father and daughter.

He turned to speak to Leo, but was taken aback by the look on his face.

"Leo-ssi, you look like you've seen a ghost," he laughed, a little nervously. Leo looked at him with unseeing eyes. Ravi thought that if he just kept talking, Leo would eventually come back from whatever thoughts he had disappeared into in his head.

"Remember the day you found me outside Siana's door? This was the song she was listening to. It's very evocative, isn't it?" Ravi looked expectantly at Leo, sensing that Ken, who was beside him, was intrigued at the mention of Siana's name. He and Ken glanced at each other as they realised Leo was not really listening, but was in his own world, a dark frown on his brow.

Ravi realised that maybe Leo was still absorbing the news that Panos had given them, but he didn't think that it deserved this kind of sombre reaction. He wondered if there was more to what had happened that afternoon in the park, but from Ken's account, it was simply a prank that Siana and George had pulled on them, to great effect.

He wondered then, why one of Panos' staff would bear a grudge on his family, or his family business. There must have been a history between that guy and the management, or at least, an incident that coloured the man's rational sense.

He looked up to see Siana approaching the table, holding her father's hand, who trailed behind her. He noted that Leo stood up, watching her with closely-veiled concern. As she reached the table, she let go of Mr Mikhalis and reached for Leo, who held out his hand as she came to him. Mr Mikhalis came around to the head of the table, smiling at Panos as he left, and giving him a hug.

Ravi watched as Siana slipped her arms around Leo's waist and held him close, leaning her head against his shoulder and closing her eyes. Had he missed something?

When had they gone from shyly pecking each other in Arachova, to being intimately comfortable like this in public?

Ravi heard a soft sigh and then felt Ken rest his head against his shoulder. He looked down at Ken to find him staring happily at Leo and Siana, a dumb smile on his face. Next to him, N was cooing softly at the couple. Ravi frowned, almost comically.

"What is all this?" Ravi murmured to Ken, who just sighed again. Across the table, he saw Hongbin smirking at them both.

"Are you up to speed now, Hyung?" he asked Ravi, who shook his head.

"What happened between yesterday and today?" Ravi asked, laughing.

Hongbin, Hyuk and N replied all together, "Lunch." They looked at each other with mischievous glints in their eyes.

"I think Ravi-ssi missed a few episodes of our unfolding romance," Hongbin said, quietly.

Then they chuckled at each other until Mr Mikhalis joined them at the table, waving at them to remain seated as they shuffled to stand up. Ravi began to chat with Mr Mikhalis about the song, and soon they were talking about time signatures and instruments and working for others, from home.

Siana disengaged from Leo and they came to sit down as well, surreptitiously holding hands under the table.

Siana listened to the conversation, but she could feel a tension from Leo which she didn't understand. Although he had hugged her back, there was something about the way he didn't quite look at her in the same way as he had at the beginning of the night. She could see it wasn't aimed at her, but she couldn't help feeling that it was consuming him to the point that he wasn't as relaxed as she thought he would be. He was preoccupied, and she put it down to the effect of her father's emotional performance. Perhaps he felt saddened by it, perhaps he was feeling concern for her.

She squeezed his hand a little, hoping to convey that she was happy. He looked up at her quickly, before dropping his gaze down to their hands, which were resting on his knee. He rubbed his thumb along the back of her hand, and she thought he looked like he was going to say something.

But he didn't.

George came over to the table to pat his uncle on the back. Mikhalis gestured for him to sit, but he shook his head.

"Panos and I have some business to attend to. But thank you all for coming," he said.

In Greek, he thanked MIkhalis for his song, and asked him if he would sing again. Mikhalis shrugged, looking at Siana, who sat forward suddenly, nodding. She let go of Leo' hand to put her on the table.

"Dad, that would be awesome, I didn't even know you used to sing here. Did you know that?" She asked him, tears welling up again in her eyes.

Mikhalis looked at her in surprise. "You don't remember? You used to sit in that corner over by the tree with your mum. I would sing til you fell asleep!"

Siana shook her head. Mikhalis nodded, thoughtfully. He never realised Siana had no memory of those times. It dawned upon him that, all this time, those now painful memories were only shared between himself and Jenny. Siana had never really looked back with any regrets about those times because she didn't have memories of them. She only seemed to be aware of the recordings she had done with him at the studio - because he always reminded her of those sessions.

Siana must have been thoroughly perplexed by their separation and eventual divorce, since she had very little idea what it was that had driven the wedge between them. Mikhalis realised that he had never really talked to her about that time - and that probably Jenny hadn't either. This was something he felt he needed to rectify, and resolved to talk with Siana soon.

George patted him on the back, then made to leave.

"We'll see you again, won't we?" Siana asked in English.

"I will be in Athens before the weekend," George said. Siana sat up with a start.

"Really? I'm supposed to go to Athens too!" Siana noticed Hongbin and Ken look up, startled.

"We just decided to go there too," Ken said, smiling around the table, then pointing to Hongbin. "It was his idea!"

Hongbin laughed nervously, catching Siana's eye before he looked at Leo, behind her. "It's just a suggestion I had."

Siana turned to look at Leo, and found him looking at her questioningly.

"My friend will be in town, we've been planning this since I got here," Siana said. She turned to speak to her dad. "It's Min, she will be here this weekend."

Mikhalis nodded, saying, "Ask her to come stay for a while."

"She can't, she's on a turnaround and will fly straight back the next day. If the schedule is still the same, she should be here Thursday night. I'll be back Saturday morning."

She turned to look at Leo, who smiled at her. Even so, she felt discomfited, thinking he felt she had kept this information from him. She supposed she could have mentioned it earlier, but so much had happened.

How unimportant Min's arrival seemed to her while she was spending time with him, until the moment she announced she was going away for a couple of days.

Now, suddenly, Siana saw herself as a rather thoughtless person who had failed to think about his thoughts on the matter.

"She's a stewardess, we arranged to meet when I flew in. I should have told you earlier."

Leo looked at her, frowning. Before he could say anything, George interrupted.

"Siana, I am going with the boys so I can't offer you a lift."

"Oh no, don't worry, I was going to take the bus anyway." Siana smiled up at George, though she felt anxious all of a sudden about Leo.

"We can take you! We'll drive down altogether!" Ken said, excitedly. Hyuk laughed out loud, his eyes on Hongbin, whose face seemed to have drained of all colour.

"I like how we are not included at all in this matter," said N, who found a surprising ally in Ravi. Ravi nodded furiously, looking at Ken with wide eyes.

"You left me out? I can't believe it! You don't think I want to go to Athens too?" Ken and Hyuk started giggling.

N slapped a hand on the table.

"The timing is perfect, we should all go. I mean, if that is alright with you Mr Mikhalis?" N looked at Mikhalis, who shrugged.

"You can do whatever you want to do. Siana will be staying with Min, as is usually what happens when Min is in town. Right, Siana?"

Siana nodded, feeling herself reddening.

She badly wanted to take Leo's hand again, but she felt oddly uncomfortable, strained by her omission, and feeling as if he was bristling with every new plan that was being made.

Was he mad at her?

 

**

 

Leo watched from the entrance as Siana and Mikhalis said their goodbyes to their family. Ravi and Ken had gone on ahead, having said a quick goodbye to Panos. N, Hyuk and Hongbin were still being polite, saying goodbyes ahead of Siana and her father, slowly heading towards him as he stood near the christmas tree.

He had shadowed Ravi and Ken as they had left, seeing that they were being brisk and wanting to get home - and had thus avoided being impolite by leaving without greeting the hosts.He didn't mind saying goodbye to relative strangers, but tonight he felt on edge, and had been since he realised that things were not as straightforward as Panos and George thought they were when it came to their errant staff member.

The sense of dread that had descended on him held him for the rest of the night, and he found it hard to shake off that feeling, even with Siana close by.

He felt as if he was breaking out in a cold sweat. The thought that had occurred to him made him wish he was being stupid or irrational. It was just a little thought, but had huge repercussions.

What if, that bartender whom George thought was taking pictures of him and Siana fighting, was not taking pictures of them at all?

Leo thought back to that night at the club. He distinctly remembered feeling the bartender's hand linger too long on his as he passed him the drinks.

Had he imagined it? After all, he had been deeply distracted by his view of Siana that night. But that was the thing - he had paused to think about it, meaning that it had struck him that the touch had been too lingering.

Too invasive.

Leo remembered noting the incident, and then shrugging it off as just another in a long line of unsolicited attentions from others - male or female.

But, was the bartender, Stavros, showing an interest in him because he recognised him as a kpop idol? Or was it simply from personal attraction?

Laughing, Leo wished for the latter.

Then, at least, the matter would be much simpler and wouldn't involve his public identity.

But the dread continued to grow, and he couldn't help feeling like he should accompany Panos and George to get to the root of the matter.

He sought out Hongbin, who was coming ahead of the other two. He felt that Binnie had been on edge all evening too, and wondered if he was thinking along the same lines as him.

When he caught Hongbin's eye, he saw there was concern there already, and he gestured for him to come outside quickly. Hongbin gave a worried look over his shoulder at Siana and her father, then ducked out after Leo into the cold winter air.

"What is it Hyung?" Hongbin asked, his face drawn and pale.

"By the look on your face I can tell you have already had some thoughts on this matter," Leo said, checking to see if anyone was nearby.

"Thoughts?" Hongbin looked, for want of a better word, scared. He continued.

"Hyung, I really didn't know that this was going to happen. It is a coincidence, I swear," Hongbin hugged his arms around himself, bunching his coat up as he did so.

"A coincidence?" Leo was confused. "What coincidence?"

"I made the arrangements separately. We didn't know Siana was going to Athens til she said so just now. We weren't planning our own trip together, I just want to make it clear."

"What are you talking about?" Leo felt irritated. He thought Hongbin was on edge because he was concerned about the incident with the bartender that afternoon.

Hongbin paused, a look of confusion on his face.

"You're- you're not mad at us? Because we didn't tell you of our plans to go to Athens? You're not mad at Siana?"

Leo felt his fists bunch involuntarily. What the heck was Hongbin babbling about?

"Mad at Siana? For god's sake, do I have to explain my stupid frown all the time? I'm not mad at Siana!"

Hongbin looked at him, surprised by his outburst.

"Hyung, you wouldn't even look at her at the table. She was very uncomfortable. I thought it was because of the trip to Athens. Which was coincidental. There was no plan to leave you out of it." Hongbin watched Leo's face carefully, as realisation hit him.

Leo scrunched up his face in frustration and looked away.

"No. No, that isn't a problem at all. If anyone should accompany Siana it should be you anyway, Binnie-"

"ME?" Hongbin squeaked, his hand inadvertently coming up to his chest. Leo threw his hands up in despair.

"Yes, of course you! She's been the closest to you hasn't she? Except for N. Why not, you're good friends. Now can we talk about something a bit more urgent?"

Hongbin shut his surprised gaping mouth and nodded, his eyes wide. Leo muttered under his breath for a moment, shaking his head.

"The man who was taking pictures today. The bartender, you remember him from that night at the club?"

Hongbin nodded. He remembered the man hovering too close when he was trying to have a private conversation with Panos. They had gone to Panos' office because of that. He felt leery of him at the time, thinking he did not know his place. And now, he was still leery of him.

"I remember. Why?"

Leo ran a hand through his hair, before putting it on his hip and shaking his head.

"I don't know, it's just a feeling. He took too long to hand me our drinks, you get what I mean?"

Hongbin nodded. Usual stuff. Then his eyes widened in shock as a thought struck him. He looked at Leo, who had obviously been thinking the same thought.

"You think he was filming you and not George?"

Leo nodded, saying, "Maybe filming me and Siana."

Hongbin's jaw clenched. He had seen Leo with Siana being intimate there at the playground that afternoon. Nothing offensive, but enough that, on film and out of context, could be seen as inappropriate at best, and downright scandalous at worst. And if that footage was spliced together with footage of Siana shouting and fighting with George...

Hongbin closed his eyes and hung his head, holding it with his hands.

To try to stop the pictures getting out, to try to keep this situation in check - if it wasn't done straight away, it would be like trying to stop water spilling out of a torn balloon.

"Hyung. You have to speak to Kkomae. N Hyung needs to know." Hongbin couldn't believe he had been fretting over Leo's seeming disapproval over the Athens trip while the big issue had been consuming his brother alone.

Leo shook his head.

"We don't know the truth of the situation yet. He might not know who we are. Who I am. It could be what George says it is, beef with management. Maybe nothing will come of it."

Hongbin calmed down. Leo was right in that they didn't know the whys of the situation, and they should in order to proceed with the proper action.

"We should go with Panos," Hongbin said suddenly, to which Leo nodded.

"That's why I am speaking to you. I wanted you to go with me."

Hongbin looked at Leo. For the first time since their debut, he saw a tension that was unlike any had ever seen, making him seem drawn and haggard. He could feel the anxiety emanating from his hyung, and he wondered how he had managed to keep that anxiety tamped down during the evening's proceedings.

He realised there was a self-control to Leo that was infinitely tighter than his own. Somehow, despite the potential threat that loomed above Leo's head, he had managed to keep his anxiety to himself, even though he had seemed agitated.

If it were me, I would have lost it. Hongbin looked at his hands and found them to be trembling. This could potentially involve all of them, since their location was supposed to be secret anyway.

It wasn't just a matter of security. There was a tender relationship of trust that existed between the group and their fans. This could come off looking like a betrayal.

Hongbin knew that they had to give their support team a heads up, even if it turned out to be for no reason. The way they handled this sort of thing publicly had a real effect on the outcome, and how well they came through unscathed.

Wait, wait. Hongbin took a breath. Leo was still right in saying the situation was still unknown. There was no reason to jump the gun, especially in this situation where it involved Siana, and her family.

The door swung open and N stepped out, his expression hawk-eyed as he walked towards them purposefully. Hongbin sensed that he and Leo looked rather like they had been caught red-handed.

"What is going on with you two?" N hissed, sneaking a look behind him.

"Nothing, go back inside!" Leo scolded feebly.

"Siana is coming out, you better make everything alright, Taekwoon." N turned, smiling that tight-lipped smile, as the door opened and Mikhalis let Siana walk out first.

 

**

 

Siana walked out, seeing Leo straight away. Despite the strange atmosphere towards the end of the evening, she still felt her heart leap a little seeing him.

His eyes met hers, and she knew for sure there was something going on. Beside him, Hongbin also looked tense and was trying not to look like he was watching her.

She saw N come forward to speak to her dad. It seemed natural, but from the tense atmosphere she could feel between the three of them, she realised N was giving her and Leo some space.

Leo was still gazing at her, his eyes concerned. She turned to her dad, interrupting him and N.

"Dad, would you mind if I go for a walk?" Mikhalis glanced at Leo, then looked around at the boys. Hongbin immediately smiled a little to try to lighten the atmosphere, stepping away from Leo and going over to N. Mikhalis looked back to Siana, who just waited patiently for his answer.

"Of course not. It's a beautiful night, a nice walk is in order," Mikhalis said, slowly and carefully, still watching Siana. She was quiet, but her eyes betrayed no anxiety. Mikhalis could see that, despite his wish to spend a little time with Siana after the evening, it could wait.

"Let's have lunch tomorrow? You hear that, N? She will be spending some time with me tomorrow," he said to N, an eyebrow raised. N nodded, laughing.

Siana said goodnight to him with a kiss and waited for N, Hongbin and her father to walk down the lane back towards home.

She turned to Leo, but was interrupted by Hyuk, who came hurrying out of the hotel with two bags full of leftovers.

"Siana-ssi, look! Enough for midnight lunch haha!" he exclaimed joyously, before noticing Leo.

"Ah, okay, I see. Goodnight. Thank you!" he nodded as she laughed. Then he scurried off, catching up with the others.

Siana finally was alone with Leo.

He looked down at her, his hands in his coat pockets, his breath misting the air before him. His dark hair seemed to have a halo of light around it, from the moonlight. In the cold, the light seemed to cast a strange blueness in the air.

"Will you go for a walk with me?" she stepped closer to him, hooking a finger onto his pocket flap. He stepped closer too, something in his eyes changing, softening. Whatever was on his mind was gone for now, replaced by something else, something that had started off the evening and had been going somewhere on the dance floor - til everything changed. She looked up at him without blinking, feeling like her eyes couldn't see enough of him.

"Anything with you," he said breathlessly.

Siana couldn't help feeling herself grow warm. She took a breath, pulling on that pocket flap with her finger.

Without a word, she walked past him, out into the car park and down towards the sea.

The water was gently lapping on the shore, the waves making tinkling noises on the tiny pebbles. High above them, the moon shone white, and created an atmosphere of glassiness as its light went through the miniscule water molecules that were suspended in the cold air.

She stopped before reaching the beach, at the edge of the car park, turning to face him as he walked up behind her. She could see into the large hotel windows, and noticed there were still people on the dance floor, even though it was late.

Before he could reach her, she turned and continued down towards the water, her shoes scrunching into the pebbles. He glanced behind him to see what she was looking at, and realised she didn't want to be in view of the others. The beach dipped towards the sea and soon he saw, they were out of sight of the hotel windows.

He watched her saunter down to the edge of the water, her hair neatly tied up with the red bobble he had given her. With her gait, her ponytail swished from side to side. Again, he thought of how it would feel if he ran it through his hands, or if he could wrap it around his fist. He had to ask himself why he was so fascinated by the idea.

Because I want her to be mine, he thought. And be able to do that whenever I want to.

The thought made his blood quicken, and he felt himself walk a little faster to catch up with her. She had stopped and turned, and waited for him to come and stand before her by the water.

She looked up at him, his eyes black under the moonlight, his angled eyebrows giving his mien a haunted, hunted look. Not for the first time, she stared at him and wondered how he could be so beautiful. He seemed to look at her with a kind of pain, as if he was waiting for her to say something to relieve it.

"You're moody."

He closed his eyes briefly, opening them with the tiniest of smiles on his lips.

"No, I'm not."

"And stubborn."

"No."

"In denial."

"No."

She smiled, feeling that their breathy non-conversation was leading them somewhere they shouldn't be going, out here on water's edge.

He didn't smile back, just watched the crinkle at the side of her mouth as she did. His jaw seemed to go slack, he was all concentration. He was gently rocking back and forth, ever so slightly, his breath quickening and his eyes glazing over under his frown as they watched her lips.

"Something's on your mind."

"No."

"You wanna talk about it?"

He closed his eyes, a small frown on his brow. When he opened them, they had cleared and focused, making Siana regret she had said anything. She wanted to see what happened when Triple T's eyes glazed over and he couldn't take his eyes off her mouth. Her hands, gloveless and cold, slipped into her jacket sleeves as she waited for him to respond.

He shook his head, his pained frown deepening as he leaned forward a little, his lips parting slightly. Oh god, he looked so hot. He looked hungry, thirsty, angry. But he was quiet, still, just watching.

She couldn't help thinking about how much she wanted to taste him again. But, hadn't they come out for a walk to talk things through? To clear things up?

I think everything's pretty clear here, she thought to herself. The details could wait.

They stood there for a few moments in silence, without moving - but speaking to each other, loud and clear.

_I want you._

_I miss you._

_Kiss me._

_Touch me._

_Hold me._

Siana opened her mouth to take a breath, and watch him slowly, gently, lean forward to seal her lips with his.

They were warm and wet, and he seemed to sink into their kiss with a heavy longing. Her hands, which were now warm from being inside her sleeves, reached up, one grasping his collar and the other sliding up to cup his jaw where it met his neck. She could feel his muscles there working as he kissed her, and he swallowed, hard.

His hands came out of his pockets and he reached around her waist and pulled her slowly but surely against him, making her arch involuntarily against his chest.

She fit perfectly against him, and she could feel the hard muscles of his thighs against her legs, and his torso like marble against her softness.

She felt an inexplicable impatience surge within her, as if she couldn't get enough of his kiss, his tongue, his body. Without thinking, she nipped at his lips with her teeth, stopping herself before she actually bit him. He gasped, pulling back to look at her in surprise. She gasped too, not knowing why she had done that, and aghast that she had literally tried to hurt him.

But then she saw his eyes change, from surprise to heated pleasure in an instant. He liked it. He liked it a lot. But he sounded angry when he spoke.

"You tried to bite me?" he asked, still holding her close, his eyes on her lips. She tried to still her breathing, which was fast and loud.

"Did it hurt?" she asked.

"Do you wish it did?" he countered, his eyes hooded and his mouth slack.

"Of course not," she whispered.

"And yet you did it," he looked into her eyes then, accusation and knowing in them.

Siana could feel herself blushing furiously. What was he thinking that made him look at her like that? And why did that look make her face grow hot and her heart race?

"You're blushing. You're red. Why?"

Siana just stared back at him. He looked down to watch the pulse in her neck as her heart raced. Then he placed his lips there, stilling for a moment until he could feel that heartbeat against his softened mouth. He pulled away, sucking on her skin for an instant before doing so. She whimpered, which gave him satisfaction.

"I saw you. You were dancing for me."

Siana caught her breath. That one moment on the dance floor when she had truly let herself go, let herself show him what she wanted from him. Let herself show him what he could have.

"Yes," she breathed, shy.

"And then you kiss me. Then you bite me. And then you blush." He took a breath, searching her face for clues. "Do I scare you?"

 

She shook her head.

"You want to punish me for something, is that it?" he seemed to be smirking at her.

She hesitated to answer, which he caught. He seemed surprised.

"You think I deserve it?"

"Yes," she finally breathed. She saw that his surprise was genuine, though he seemed to be trying to decide whether she was joking, or flirting.

"You do? For what?"

She sighed, wishing she didn't have to articulate what she felt inside: hot, bothered, turned on but close to frustration. Close to asking him to come home with her.

"Well, midnight seemed to come early tonight because you turned into a pumpkin real quick." She looked up at him petulantly.

He laughed then, loud and hearty, surprising her this time. Because he was still holding her tight to him, she could feel his laughter resonating deep in his chest, and felt his arms tighten as he looked up to the sky. Although he was laughing, she could feel that tension creeping back into his voice, as if he was at the edge of despair. She tightened her grip on his arms.

"Yes, I did," he smiled down at her, the crinkles at the edges of his eyes changing his demeanour entirely. He was no longer the hot, sexy man with the wolfish gaze, but rather, boyish. Playful.

His laughter died down as he looked at her, dwindling into a soft smile.

"But it wasn't because of you," he said, sombrely.

"But something happened, didn't it? Something changed?" She watched him turn his face away towards the sea, nodding slightly. A small frown worried his face, and she reached up to touch his cheek. He turned his face toward her, into her hand, and looked into her eyes with a soft, plaintive gaze.

Oh. Oh my, she thought, feeling like her heart had dropped away. That's a look.

As he stared into her eyes, he planted a soft kiss on the inside of her hand, and he reached up to press her hand against his mouth, then to bring it down and hold it against his chest.

"We should go on that walk. We have to talk."

Siana felt a sudden fear. This wasn't about his moodiness anymore. Something important had happened that had affected him, and it was something that he felt obliged to tell her. Which meant that even though she didn't cause the change in him, it involved her somehow.

He bent his head, still clutching her hand at his heart, and for a moment, she thought he looked like he was saying a prayer. Then he slowly raised his head, bringing his mouth to hers for the softest, slowest of kisses.

It was different this time. Tender, giving. When he pulled back, his eyes remained closed as he took a slow, deep breath.

When he opened them, he looked at her with something like sadness, or sorrow. Siana realised with a shock, that he looked like a man about to say goodbye.

"What is it? You're really scaring me now," she asked.

He let her hand go, and reached up to brush the hair out of his eyes.

"Let's walk."

He stepped out of their embrace, taking her hand and leading her along the shore towards the centre of town. They walked slowly, listening to the crunch of the pebbles beneath their feet.

She waited for him to talk, which he didn't do til they reached the end of the pebble beach, right where the promenade started, right by Miami. He stopped and turned to her, just where they were still in the shadows, out of the light that spilled out to the sea from Miami's interior.

For a few moments, he looked out into the water, which was glassy under the moonlight. She looked out too, enjoying the cold air on her warm face. He turned a little to her, taking a deep breath.

"Today at the playground, when George was saying goodbye, remember?"

She nodded, surprised by the topic.

"He noticed someone taking footage of you. Of him. Someone he knows."

Siana absorbed the information, waiting for him to continue.

"It was the bartender at your uncle's club."

Siana nodded, but she needed more information to figure out why this was pertinent to his change of mood earlier that evening. "Okay."

"George and Panos are worried that it looks like he was fighting with a girl in public, in uniform."

"Oh. Yes, that could look bad. But only if it got posted or something. They don't trust him?"

"No. Neither do I, but for another reason."

Leo looked out at sea again. When he looked back at her, he was slightly abashed by what he was about to say.

"That bartender interacted with me at the club. That night." Siana nodded, biting her lip as he looked at her. Yes, she remembered that night all too clearly.

"Maybe I imagined it, but I thought he was coming on to me somehow."

Siana smiled. "I guess you might be used to that?"

"Well, I thought nothing of it at the time. I had other things on my mind." He looked at her, pausing.

"Uhuh."

She was trying hard not to lose her concentration, but why was he reminding her of all those distracting things? Stick to the facts, Triple T, she urged silently.

"But it occurred to me that maybe, he wasn't recording you and George this afternoon."

Siana snapped to attention. Oh no.

"I thought that maybe he was recording you and me."

Leo looked at her then, and waited with baited breath to see her reaction.

Siana could see why this was a big worry to him. But she couldn't grasp the enormity of the consequences of footage of them getting out there would have on him, on her. She needed for him to articulate what exactly about this knowledge was disturbing him.

"Okay. Are you worried that he might post footage of us?"

Leo laughed, a little desparately. Siana guessed that he had already thought of a plethora of possible consequences to that happening, and that was what tinged his laughter with despair.

"When I started training, it was like being at school again. I didn't know why we had to learn it like a drill. Like the times table. I thought we were being brainwashed. But it was such a small and silly price to pay for the opportunity I felt I was being given."

He glanced at her, then down at his feet.

"As far as the fans go, we are single and celibate, and the only time we would ever think about love or sex, it was in the context of fan service or performance."

Siana nodded, having heard something similar from her father. The reality of that existence suddenly hit home. What happened if an idol fell in love? Or even, if they were just looking to hook up with someone for a while? She couldn't imagine having to keep all the feelings that she had felt in the last few days secret, or even to have to lie barefaced to her family.

She supposed that there were many who had to do that, obliged to keep the facade required, but also to keep the two parties involved safe from public outcry.

This also turned her thought to Leo's intentions.

He had made it clear to her that he wanted more than just a holiday fling - which was something she was content to experience. She still thought now that she was being realistic. After all, they were to separate soon, and there was much that he had to lose from entering into a relationship for long term as he wished.

But now, she wondered why he was so concerned.

Was the threat of exposure something that triggered his sense of self-protection? Maybe he realised that he would have to face a lot if their relationship were to be made public. Maybe he was having second thoughts about pursuing something more serious.

She glanced at him, unsure of her feelings about that. Even though it was she who had been happy with the idea of keeping it short and sweet, thinking that he might be getting cold feet now made her a little agitated. A little put out.

She thought that maybe, he would at least put up a fight for her. Wasn't she worth more than the discomfort of public exposure?

Shut up Siana, she thought to herself. He hasn't even finished what he has to say, and here you are jumping to conclusions.

My feelings, my prerogative, she retorted to herself. It didn't feel good to think that he was getting cold feet at the slightest hint of trouble. The feeling was real and she was having a hard time being patient in hearing him out.

"He could post something, and it could disappear without any notice. But," and here Leo turned to her, so serious she felt alarmed, "he could edit it, or make up a story, or have some other bad intention. My biggest fear is that he harbours hatred for me. Or worse, for you."

Siana was startled by that. Oh. If the man felt rejected by Leo, then seeing him with a girl could definitely engender hatred for her.

If he was that kind of person.

Siana felt an encroaching dread. Leo could see that she was beginning to get the idea.

"That's if there is any passion in his intention. It could be that he is motivated by something completely different, like money. He could sell the footage, which would allow whoever buys it to edit it however they wish. They would own it. We would need to take legal action to stop them from using it."

Leo's jaw clenched and he sighed irritably, looking back out into the moonlit sea.

"I'm just hoping that George is right. I'm just hoping that maybe I have an over-inflated sense of myself and that maybe the guy doesn't know who I am. That he doesn't care who the hell I think I am. But I cannot stop worrying about this, about what this could do to you."

"To me?" Siana's throat was dry. Leo looked back at her, his expression anguished. She reached a hand out to his.

"If it turns out that I am the reason, if it's because of who I am, I don't think I could forgive myself for being the cause of your distress."

Siana couldn't help thinking that she was stupid, stupid to ever think that she would be happy with just a few weeks, a few moments, with this man.

In the midst of all that looming trouble, of all the anxiety that she could feel building up inside him and the threat that seemed to lurk in the darkness around them, she actually felt herself falling, falling so hard and so deep in love that she thought her heart would burst.


	8. Hurry Home

Panos parked the car and he and George got out and walked into the club.

It was past opening hour but the car park was still a little empty as it was a weeknight. He knew there were several regulars who would always be there, nightowls who came for the company rather than the dancing or the drinking.

The party at the hotel was still going on, but he and George felt they had to check on Stavros straight away before he did anything rash, even if he had no intentions to do anything with that footage at all.They had decided against waiting til the morning to see Stavros away from the workplace. There was the possibility that he could react badly to their intervention, whether he was innocent of any wrongdoing or not, but they felt the urgency of the situation called for their immediate action.

They had said their goodnights and left.

As they walked out to the car, he got a text from Hongbin asking if he could go with them to see Stavros. Panos thought it was not a good idea, and let Hongbin know they would settle this business without him as it was an in-house matter.

He knew what potential situations Hongbin was thinking about - and he thought it wise that if Stavros were really up to no good and knew the identity of Leo, that no one from the group be there when they confronted him. Hongbin agreed with that, but he let him know about the potential outcomes of that footage getting out, if seen under the wrong context.

Panos was surprised by how much detail Hongbin went into all the possible scenarios that could arise. It was as if he was reciting textbook information, he knew them so well. He realised that, although nothing could be certain, any potential outcome could be construed as scandalous and this was a huge worry for the group.

Panos wanted to make sure that the situation was controlled immediately.

He went up to the bar while George opened up the office.

Stavros was there already, chatting idly with the other bartender, Eleni at the bar.

"Yeiasas. Kyrie Stavros, ena lepto parakalo," he asked Stavros for a minute, waiting patiently as Stavros exchanged looks with Eleni before coming out of the bar to follow him to the office.

Inside, George leaned on the desk, waiting, and gestured to Stavros to sit on the couch. Panos pulled up a chair and they began. George cut straight to the matter at hand.

"You were in the park filming me today," George began, as it was obvious that Stavros knew what this was about.

Stavros laughed, a bitchy smirk on his face.

"Oh come on Mr George, why would I be filming you?"

Panos felt his anger surge. Stavros had a way of stirring up his ire with an immediate effect. He glanced at George, who kept an admirably cool countenance as he stared Stavros down.

"That is what I asked myself too, actually. Why would my bartender be filming me?"

Stavros scoffed, turning to let his eyes roam about the office. The staff rarely came in here, and Panos thought it just like Stavros, that even under these circumstances, his greedy gossip eyes were feasting on details he was already making mental notes about.

Now, now, Panos told himself. Easy on the presumptions. He drew a slow, calming breath.

When George didn't press any further, Stavros turned back to look at him. The silence was uncomfortable for him, and Panos could see it was riling him up. He was used to reacting with vitriol, but he certainly wasn't one to take the lead in an offensive strike.

He's a coward, thought Panos. He feels better about his cowardice by backtalking, side talking and dropping bitchy remarks, and making himself feel bigger than he really is.

He watched George eyeing Stavros calmly, letting him stew for a while.

Then George smiled, looking as if he was snarling silently. Panos wondered what kindly, gentle George who like his accounting books to balance neatly, had gone through in the last few months, that had brought this side out of him.

Panos thought back to his own time there. He had gone early because it suited the time and the energy that he had. He was still too young to really handle the work he would have liked to do for his father, and he felt at his peak. In the army, he had been popular with seniors and made some good friends. But what he had learned after coming back home was that, whatever he thought he learned in the army and brought out with him, he had really already had all along.

It was just that in the army, he found those strengths and weaknesses were shown to him in ways he never saw at home, at rest.

So, whatever beast it was that George seemed to be keeping on a leash inside him, had always been there, even when George was the gentle, bookish man who had stayed by his father's side as long as he could before going into service.

Panos knew, that beast was loyalty, protection. George wasn't going to let this little man in their house try to get one up on him, or on their family.

Panos wondered if Stavros knew Siana well, and was trying to set her up for public outcry. He knew it wouldn't matter here in Itea. Siana, whilst welcome, didn't live here. She had certain liberties as an outsider, even though being an outsider sometimes hurt her in the past.

He looked once more to Stavros, who was fidgeting, but still clutching at his bravado and trying to maintain the upper hand. He detested that the man put so much energy into creating negativity. But, he supposed, there was something that appealed to customers, since it suited the image of the cool bartender.

They just don't see it as whining like management does, Panos smirked.

George crossed his arms, settling more comfortably against the desk.

"I think Stavros here must think I am so full of myself. Well, I am, I really am. Which is why it hurt me so much to realise he wasn't filming me at all."

Stavros huffed, catching Panos' eye and looking away.

"Then I thought, is Stavros a k-pop fan? Is he just glad to get close to an idol?" George paused to watch Stavros carefully, and Panos observed him too. The surprise in his face was interesting. It bespoke surprise that kpop came up, but not that it was assumed he was recording Leo.

"Do you know who they are?" Panos asked, a small smile on his face. Stavros, happy to duck out of Stavros' intense perusal, turned to Panos.

"I know now." Panos thought that was an interesting answer too.

"You know now? You didn't know when you were recording? So you were recording because of the fighting? Or what looked like fighting," he corrected himself. He glanced at George.

Stavros seemed to squirm, looking a little unsure, but as if he would burst if he didn't share what he had to say.

"Eleni is a fan, so she told me who they were," he said, his hands gesturing unnecessarily.

George made a big show of going "Ah, I see," and nodding, as if he understood the glee with which a fan would react to such information.

"Oh, Eleni recognised them when they came here that night." Panos stated matter-of-factly.

"Yes," Stavros nodded emphatically, stopping when he locked eyes with Panos. Panos smiled kindly at him, but Stavros had given himself away. He was filming Leo after all, and knew who he was when he began recording. Behind his smile, Panos felt the situation had turned grave, and how they retrieved the material from Stavros would colour the way this panned out.

"Something to share with Eleni perhaps?" Panos asked.

"Uh, yeah. I mean, I showed her the footage. She's a fan, after all."

George leaned forward suddenly, looking Stavros dead in the eye.

"Here's the thing, Stavros. I'm a very shy man. I don't like having my picture taken without my knowledge. I don't want my face all over the internet. Not in my uniform. Now, I know you weren't recording me, but I am in the video. So," George sat back up, softening his voice a little, but never letting go of Stavros' gaze, "I would like you to delete it please."

Stavros blinked.

Panos waited, his breath still.

"But-"

George held up his hand.

"Maybe you would never share it, but I don't know you well enough to trust that would never happen, do I? And it would be difficult for me to focus on my responsibilities while I am away, if we have this distrust hanging between us, wouldn't it?"

George stood then, walking forward to sit in the chair next to Panos, and leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees.

"So, as a show of faith, I would like it very much if you could delete it. Please."

Panos watched Stavros' face. He could see something wasn't adding up for Stavros, and there was a kind of fear in his eyes. But, before he could say something, Stavros whipped out his phone and scrolled through it.

He found the clip and held up the phone, then was about to delete it when George stopped him.

"Wait."

Stavros looked at him, startled.

"Let me see that."

"What? Why? I'm about to delete it."

So quickly Panos was startled, George whipped forward and snatched the phone out of his hands. Stavros yelped, but sat back, utterly shaken.

"You see, I know you were about to delete it. But the thumbnail, Stavros. The picture caught my eye," George muttered, shaking his head as he brought up the video and held it up for them all to see.

 

**

 

Hongbin was seated on the carpet, with Hyuk sprawled out on the floor in front of him. N, Kkomae and Seokkie were taking up all the available space in front of the fireplace and TV, so he and Hyuk had taken up the floor space near the balcony doors with the others.

He noticed a text come through on his phone.

As he opened up his messages to read it, he felt the warm presence of Ravi and Ken on either side of him. They were peering over each shoulder to see his phone. Hyuk looked up and rolled his eyes.

Hongbin paused, his thumb hovering over the message notification. He looked left and right, but they just waited.

"Are you guys hugging each other with me in between?" Hongbin asked quietly.

Ravi settled his chin on his shoulder with a little sigh. Ken patted his shoulder, but it turned into a slow rub.

"You have a message, Hongbinnie," Ken said in a soft voice.

Hongbin shifted a little to look at him properly, but Ken's eyes were just glued to the phone.

He looked at Hyuk, who was smiling down at his hands as he curled them into the carpet.

"Sometimes I get the disturbing feeling I have no idea what the reality of my life is," Hongbin murmured to Hyuk, who lifted his hands to rub his eyes as he laughed. His large hands dominated his face, which seemed to disappear behind them.

"So cute," Ravi cooed, his chin still resting on Hongbin's shoulder.

"I'm cute," Ken said, whining.

"Aww, you're cute," Ravi agreed. Hongbin felt a little pressure on his body as they squeezed each other behind him.

Hongbin arched out of their odd embrace, pulling forward and away, to turn and look at them as they collapsed into a gentle heap behind him.

They looked like half-asleep puppies, confused by the sudden removal of their warm comforter.

"You guys need to understand a few things about personal space," Hongbin said, finally opening up his messages.

"My parents warned me about this kind of behaviour," Hyuk said, shaking his head.

"Girl... I need a girl..." Ken sang Taeyang's song softly, his hand stroking the shaved part of Ravi's hair at the back of his head. Ravi's feet waggled as he smiled.

Hyuk laughed, making Ken laugh too.

"Yes, my parents were right, exactly this kind of behaviour," Hyuk giggled.

"Don't judge me, maknae!" Ken screeched, making Ravi guffaw so hard his body shook. They looked at Hongbin to see his reaction.

He looked up from his phone, his face drained of colour. Their laughter died down.

"We're just playing, Binnie," Ravi said, looking at the others. At the sofa, N looked over when he heard the change in Ravi's voice.

"It's from Panos," Hongbin said, turning the phone to face the others. N got up and came over.

The clip showed the playground and its surrounds, as it had been that afternoon. They could see Leo, in his dark blue peacoat, his hands in his pockets. Before him stood Siana, her face turned up to him.

Hongbin waited for the boys to settle before playing the clip. He knew that, somewhere to the left of frame, he and Ken were approaching the playground and basketball court, and that in a few moments, the fake fight between Siana and George would play out.

Hongbin already knew what the video had captured, because he had seen it in real life himself. He pressed play, keeping an eye on N's reaction. Behind him, he noticed Kkomae look over to watch them.

They watched as Leo looked down at Siana, his face a mask. She spoke, concern in her eyes, as she reached for his jacket and stepped closer.

Ravi's eyes widened. Ken gasped.

Then she smiled, an impish smile. They realised she was teasing him, and held their breath waiting to see his reaction.

When he laughed that clear, deep laugh, they were a little taken aback, but not as much as when he suddenly leaned down and kissed her full on the lips. Her hands went under his jacket, encircling his body.

This time N gasped, his hand flying up to his mouth.

"Should we watch this?" he said, looking worried. Hongbin could see N felt they were intruding on Leo's privacy. However the fact of the matter was, someone else had already done that, and it wasn't one of their own. They had to proceed.

They watched in silence as they saw him almost swaying against her, their kiss was so fervent, then breaking away to look down at her, his jaw slack and his eyes pained.

Hongbin didn't feel he could keep watching, so he stared at the carpet instead, hearing rather than seeing what developed in the clip.

N frowned, looking away momentarily. Hongbin understood what N was feeling. If anyone understood Leo Hyung, it was N - especially when it came to his self-consciousness. It had taken so much to coax out his relaxed side, and to develop the onscreen persona that he felt comfortable showing the public. Hongbin himself felt horrible that they were privy to this intensely personal, intimate moment. He could only imagine what N Hyung felt.

Leo ran a hand through his hair and looked up, anxious, as he seemed to blurt out something to her. She softened, pulling her hands out to hold his arms, looking at him with a gentle concern as she whispered something to him.

Whatever she had said, it affected him - or maybe it was the touch of her hand. But that wild look in his eyes disappeared as he seemed to focus on her with an intensity that made the boys lean forward, as if to try to hear what she would say next.

Hongbin looked at the clip then, seeing Leo's face, when that afternoon he had seen Siana's face only.

He seemed to gape at Siana, as if realising for the first time, what she meant to him.

Or at least, that was what struck Hongbin. He sighed, deeply. Maybe the public wouldn't agree with him, but he was absolutely convinced that his was the face of a man in love.

Then they heard Hyuk's high-pitched scream, and saw Siana look towards the playground where they were. Leo didn't seem to hear anything, he just kept looking at her. Then, she was walking forward, her voice raised as she yelled at George.

They watched til the end, which lasted longer than the fight. They were disturbed to see that whoever took the clip, recorded their introductions and their cheerful conversation, all the while keeping Leo and Siana in focus.

Leo, standing against Siana's back as she leaned into him and kept her hands on his arms, which she held hung around her shoulders. They could even see the tiny moment when George noticed the camera, just seconds before the clip ended.

Hongbin turned the phone towards him to go out of his messages, just as another pinged in.

The boys were quiet, but N was particularly agitated, shaking his head.

"Does Taekwoon know?" he asked Hongbin. Hongbin shook his head, reading his new message.

"There's more," he said flatly, a frown worrying his brows.

"What?" gasped Ravi, Ken unusually quiet by his side. N got up and walked over to Kkomae, and they immediately began a hushed conversation.

"What is it?" asked Hyuk.

Hongbin read the message again.

"They found two other clips on the guy's phone. One was us all on the dance-floor the night we went to the club. Another was taken outside."

Hongbin's phone pinged again as the two clips came in. He shook his head. He couldn't bear it.

"I don't think I can watch this. Panos wouldn't have sent it unless it was... I don't think we should watch."

Hongbin was thankful that the boys were in agreement about that, but he felt sick to his stomach already. He felt on behalf of Leo that violation of privacy, and it made him at once angry and fearful of the consequences.

He suddenly, desperately wished that they had never come here.

He hated that he thought that, hated that this defeatist thought had entered his mind. Hated that there were people out there that created that reaction in him.

Hongbin took a deep breath. Even now, he could understand the person's actions. He could see why, he could see how their emotions got the better of them and spoiled their judgment, leading them to intrude on someone's personal moment with such... determination.

He could even see how there were so many separate, unrelated incidents that simply led to a confluence of paths where this person decided to record something he had no right to.

Hongbin understood all that - how the events themselves were basically neutral incidences.

What he couldn't reconcile was the thought that once the person was presented with the choice to record or not to record, they continually decided on invasion, abuse - and did it for a solid ten minutes, let alone the other clips they hadn't seen. It felt humiliating, as if Leo and Siana had been robbed of their choice, and were not even aware of it happening. They were not given the opportunity to say no.

Or to decide for themselves when they would feel comfortable with showing the world what was going on between them.

Hongbin felt bile rising in his throat. He felt deeply for Siana too, and wondered what would happen to her if all this went badly.

This turned his thoughts to Leo, and for a moment, he felt a sudden surge of anger that he had not taken better care, had not protected her, or even noticed that they were being recorded. He should have done one of those useless flying kicks on the man and destroyed his phone, he thought, irrationally.

He took another deep breath. That sickening feeling of dread, anger and futility was roiling around inside his chest, and it was making him think like a madman.

I'm going to lose my shit, he thought, standing abruptly and yanking open a balcony door to step outside.

He felt the chill against his face and let his breath out, misting the air. He took a moment to calm his breathing, leaning his hands against the railing and looking down at the small street below.

He heard someone come out, and looked up to see N.

"Hyung." N looked at Hongbin in the eyes, his mien serious, his eyes piercing.

"You alright, Binnie?" he asked, slinging an arm around Hongbin's shoulders and giving them a quick squeeze before turning to face the apartment and lean against the railing.

"I feel sick," Hongbin sighed. N nodded, sighing irritatedly.

"Why now?" N said. Hongbin looked up to see N was emotional, his throat working as he swallowed.

"Hyung?"

"I just wanted for one of us to have something... something just for themselves. Something beautiful. They haven't had enough time together and now..."

Hongbin straightened up, sensing the depth of feeling N had about this.

"Maybe we are overreacting. We got the footage. Panos said they deleted it all from the guy's phone."

"You think he hasn't shown it off to someone? Or emailed it to himself already? Or made a copy or posted it. Or sold it?" N looked at Hongbin with a wet-eyed defiance.

"I haven't thought that far ahead. I was thinking of how Leo will feel when we tell him."

N's face changed, and it broke Hongbin's heart. N blinked away tears as his mouth turned down at the corners, his lips trembling a little.

N sobbed, a quiet smiling sob that spoke of his anguish.

"Hyung. What are we going to do?"

N brusquely wiped away tears and sniffed.

"Kkomae is already notifying SajangNim."

Hongbin's mouth dropped open.

"Shouldn't we speak to Leo Hyung first?"

N shook his head.

"It pains me to say this, but Leo's feelings come last right now. We have to make sure the situation is under control first, and we can't wait for him to take the first step." N looked down at his hands, which he held together in front of him. He was worrying his fingers, squeezing and rubbing them as if to give himself comfort.

"It must be hard for you, Hyung," Hongbin murmured, realising that N was putting his concern for Leo's feelings second to his concern for Leo's reputation.

He hoped that Leo would see that the same way. He turned to look towards the bay, searching the brightly lit main road for any sign of him.

He took out his phone and sent a message to Leo.

_Come home. Panos has the footage._

He sent it and tucked the phone back into his pocket.

Hurry home, Taekwoon.

 

**

 

Leo felt the message come through on his phone, but he ignored it. He knew, it could be dreaded news. But this moment was very important to him, and also very important to Siana.

Whatever news the message contained, it could wait until he was certain of the outcome of their conversation. Achieving that resolution, whatever it may be, was paramount to him, and he did not want the circumstances of their predicament to distract, sway or affect that in any way. So for now, that message had to wait. It may be urgent, but this was much more important.

Siana had listened to him confess his deepest fear about the situation, and he had been taken aback by her reaction.

Tears had suddenly welled up in her eyes, and she shook her head, almost laughing, as she wiped them roughly away and sniffed.

"Why are you more afraid for me than I am?" she said, her voice thick. Leo didn't answer. He felt he had already said what he had to say, and now her line of questioning was like asking him to repeat himself.

Finally, she looked back at him, her face soft with tears and her lips red. Perhaps she realised she needed to rephrase her words.

"Why do you want to be with me?" she said.

He blinked. This was as direct a question as she could ask without actually asking that other question, "do you love me?"

When he didn't answer, she instinctively crossed her arms over her body, hugging herself tight and looking down at the tiny rocks at her feet.

He searched her face for a clue as to what was going on in her mind. She worried her lip with her teeth, unaware that he was looking at her.

"You could just deny it," she smiled at the ground, her eyes wet.

He shook his head.

"It would save you a lot of trouble. And your company. The boys," she continued, finally looking up at him with that strange smile. He pursed his lips. Why was she saying this? He felt a peculiar anger rising. Had she not understood what he had just said?

That he could never forgive himself if he were to be the cause of her distress.

She seemed to be acting all obtuse about his admission. Had he been unclear? Did she not value what he felt? He had all but confessed love to her, and yet she seemed to be caught up in her pointless pursuit of clarification.

"Or I could fabricate a lie. Pretend it was for a shoot or something," he blurted out, coldly.

Then he saw it, that hurt in her eyes. But, she masked it quickly, nodding, her mouth still smiling.

"It would explain it all very well," she said, nodding.

"I mean, maybe nothing will come of it. Maybe there's nothing to worry about. But if this were to blow up out of proportion, and if, as you say, it could hurt me... You already have the explanation that could make it all go away."

She inhaled deeply, looking out at sea. Then she turned to him, her demeanour finally composed.

"Which is why I ask you again, if it turns out bad, and if it hurts me, then why do you want to be with me?"

She looked at him with eyes still wet, but clear and filled with intention. He realised that, despite her tears, she had all along understood him better than he had understood himself.

Siana was giving him a chance to protect them both.

 

**

 

Panos left the office, leaving George to deal with Stavros.

He had just sent all the clips he had found to Hongbin and to himself. He had deleted them, feeling a sense of foreboding, as if deleting them would actually cause more problems than avoid them.

He wished he could keep Stavros' phone for longer but there were limits that even they as employers had to observe. What he wanted was to go through his email and messages, but Stavros had his own rights too - and much as he wanted to just throw caution to the wind, George was involved and he didn't want things to get any more complicated than they already were.

As he left, he heard George say something about how well they had treated Stavros despite the fact that he had violated the privacy of several people and could even be seen as trying to besmirch the good reputation of a serving member of the Hellenic Military Corps. Panos smirked. That may work, but it could also backfire, as Stavros could accuse George of strong-arming him into submission - and although he had given them permission to go through his photos and delete them, he could say he was under duress to do that, too.

Still, Panos believed that Stavros was ultimately a coward, and would likely lay low.

He wanted to speak to Siana and didn't want any prying eyes or ears, so he walked past the bar to go sit in his car. As he passed, Eleni looked up briefly, a worried look on her face. Of course, she would be concerned about Stavros as a friend as well as a co-worker.

"I'll be outside if anyone needs me," Panos said brusquely, hearing her acknowledge him as he left.

Outside, he got into his car and texted Siana.

I have updated Hongbin, need to talk to you.

Her message remained unread for a few minutes. Panos sighed impatiently, and called instead.

She picked up after a few rings.

"Nai, Pano," she said in Greek, her voice thick.

"Pou eisai?" Where are you?

"Sto yialo." At the beach.

"You know where I am?"

"At the club. Did you find anything?"

"Yes. We got it all, we deleted it. Hongbin has a copy."

"All?" Panos heard a flicker of worry in Siana's voice. He knew she was quick. And tough. But he didn't know how she would handle the next bit of news. After all, she had her pride, and liked her privacy. He took a deep breath.

"You and Leo in the carpark outside the club. And you and him in Galaxidi."

Panos felt the silence grow so thick it was deafening. He spoke to fill it in.

"Outside the club, I can understand. But how he got footage of you in Galaxidi-"

"That was this afternoon, Pano." Siana's voice was small, tense.

Panos sat up. "What? That means he followed you back to Itea-"

"Where in Galaxidi?" Siana was obviously ahead of him.

Panos cleared his throat, remembering the images he saw, of Siana in Leo's heated embrace by the waters. The footage had been taken from high up - and he knew it was from the hospitality academy, a place Stavros regularly visited.

"By the sea. The academy."

He waited, not knowing how Siana would respond.

"I'll call you back. But... Thank you, Pano." Siana sounded defeated. Small.

He hated that. He hated that this was being done to Siana.

"Anything, doll." Panos hung up. Suddenly angered, he got out of the car and strode back inside, past Eleni who was standing by the entrance, whose eyes widened at his expression. It irritated him that she was so fearful when his anger was obviously directed at someone else. His blood was already boiling as he approached the office door.

He banged through the office door, making Stavros jump. George looked up quizzically.

Panos glared at Stavros, who seemed to crumple in on himself from fear.

"You followed her! You followed her, you slime! What did she ever do to you, you goddam maggot?!" Panos could have screamed at the top of his lungs, he was so angry.

"What's this?" George stood up, his eyes like daggers as he towered over the cowering Stavros.

"The clip from Galaxidi was from today, before you met Siana in town. He followed her all day."

"No! No I didn't!" Stavros' voice was strangled in his throat.

"Explain yourself, then" George said, his calm voice threatening.

"I-it.. it was sent to me!" Stavros wailed. George looked at Panos, his eyes wide with surprise.

"What the hell is going on here, Stavros? You trying to say there are more assholes out there like you, and you have an organised network, is that it?"

"No, it wasn't like that! It just happened. A... a friend saw them and took it, then sent it to me," he wailed.

Panos had never felt like he could beat someone with his bare hands, but the rage that ran through him when he thought about how Siana must feel...

Panos heard a door slam outside, and he cocked his head to listen for more noise. He looked at Stavros, who had turned toward the sound, still simpering to himself on the couch. Then Stavros sneaked a look at him, and was shocked to find Panos watching him.

Panos suddenly got it.

He went out, looking for Eleni.

She was gone.

 

**

 

Siana was still waiting for Leo to answer her when she felt the message come through on her phone.

She didn't like how she sounded. Whiny. Needy. She suddenly realised he might be taking her line of questioning the wrong way.

"Don't answer that. Forget I asked," she said quickly.

She sat down on the pebbles, running her fingers through the tiny stones. Leo sat down too, and they stared out into the sea in silence.

She knew why he had said what he said about fabricating a lie. Like her, he could see how this looming situation could be explained away, easily. The way he had said it was hurtful, but she could tell he was also offended that she had even brought it up.

It was showing up the fundamental difference between them, in how they looked at their relationship. It also showed how they felt the same way.

He wanted to preserve the integrity of it, to stay true to himself and to her, no matter the onslaught. She was flexible, and willing to give some leeway as to how they presented themselves, and how they felt for each other. She could be happy to be upfront, or happy to lay low.

In their separate ways, they shared the same endpoint of being together.

She had brought up her question because she felt that if, as he believed, and it seemed, as the rest of them did, that their being together was going to be difficult, then why did the possibility of this situation erupting have to be the deciding factor in how they revealed themselves to the world?

Nobody had to know for sure if they were an item. She had noticed enough of celebrity life to see that if the celeb lay low long enough, whatever trifling scandals that came up were soon forgotten and forgiven by the public, as long as they hadn't done anything unacceptably immoral.

She was quite willing to play along with a charade if that were necessary. What she wanted to know was why he didn't even consider it as a first option.

Then she took a moment to listen to herself, to look at herself, and decided she didn't like that she had asked that question of him. Firstly, she felt overly clingy about it. Secondly, she realised she had somehow offended him.

He didn't like that she was questioning his loyalty, so soon after she had gone soft over him worrying about being the cause of her misery.

Again she was reminded that being with someone meant a whole lot of adjusting - and that the proper, orderly disclosure of feelings and intention were necessary for clarity, and the building of trust.

Ah Siana, she thought. Just because you have a train of thought doesn't mean you should follow it. Not when doing so meant walking all over another's feelings.

"I... I only said that because I don't want you to feel like you're to blame. You didn't do this to me. And I hope you don't blame me either."

She laughed a little, feeling suddenly vulnerable. She didn't think she could care so much what another person thought of her.

She felt him take her hand gently, and she looked down at their interlaced fingers as he squeezed them. She felt a sudden tiredness come over her. The evening had been full, even so after a full day. How had she ever felt tired from a normal day of life? This emotional up and down of a day had her exhausted - and she felt a numbness creep over the anxiety she felt about their situation. She wanted to be able to just draw a curtain over it all, and forget it was there.

She wished to lay down and sleep, and wanted to wake with him in her arms.

She looked up at him, watched his fine profile as he stared down at their hands. If she asked him, would he indulge her wish?

Then her phone rang, and he smiled a little as he let her hand go.

As she answered, he pulled his own phone out to check his messages.

They both looked at each other at the same time, which was when she realised they hadn't even begun to imagine the depth of the situation they were in.

 

**

 

Mikhalis opened the door to find Siana standing outside with Leo, their hands entwined as they waited for him to open it.

He knew immediately something was up, from the sombre expression in Leo's eyes as he bowed his head in greeting, and from Siana's teary, tired eyes. Something had happened between him walking home and them walking home, and he could see that his normally happy Siana was somewhere where she could not see happiness.

"Koukla mou, ti yeinetai?" Darling, what's happening?

He waited as she turned to Leo and nodded, letting him go. He went to the stairs, looking back one last time before taking the steps up, two at a time. Siana turned back to him and smiled a weary smile. Mikhalis turned and walked inside, letting her close the door behind her.

He put the kettle on to boil and waited for her to come into the kitchen. She came in, obviously distracted by her thoughts, and leaned against the counter as they listened to the water begin to rumble inside the pot.

Mikhalis just waited, knowing that she was trying to find the words, or the right moment when she had control of her feelings, to express herself.

Finally, she reached for his hand across the counter, unable to meet his eyes.

"I still haven't called mum. She doesn't know," she said softly, as he took it.

She started crying then, and he drew her in for a hug. She rested her head on his shoulder, sobbing quietly. Mikhalis felt alarmed by her emotion, not having seen her cry like this since she was a little kid. He would immediately have thought she had a falling out with Leo, but he had seen with his own eyes that they had not.

He knew Siana understood that the only thing she had total control over, were her own actions and her feelings. Thus he surmised that this outburst was not so much to do with her newfound relationship, but rather something bigger than it, that would affect it in a way she could not control.

This thought scared Mikhalis, because he worried that it was something that he could not do anything about at all to help her.

"Mum won't mind, you know that," he said gently.

"She will if she doesn't hear it from me first," Siana mumbled, pulling away to sniff and wipe her face with her hands.

Mikhalis looked at her quizzically. "It's only been a few days, she won't mind that you found someone and didn't tell her straight away."

Saying that seemed to upset Siana rather than calm her.

"Can we sit outside? It feels better outside," Siana said, going to the kitchen door and opening to let herself into the yard.

Mikhalis grabbed an old jacket he kept by the door just for this purpose: Siana's predilection for sitting in the cold on the hard wrought iron furniture at all times of the day meant that he had to be prepared.

She sat at the table, sinking into her chair and resting her head on the back of it to look up at the stars. He saw her eyes momentarily flick over to the balcony above them where the boys were staying. He could see her tears were already drying, and felt better for her.

She sighed, saying, "Dad, you're mature enough, right?"

Mikhalis laughed, nodding. "Yes, Ana mou, I can take whatever it is you're going to tell me."

Siana giggled, a little hysteria overcoming her for a moment. She smiled at him, on the verge of crying again, but not letting herself. MIkhalis sensed that perhaps she felt reluctant to speak to him about something that was intensely personal to her. Maybe she felt she had no choice, and now felt obligated to give him a heads up before he found out from someone else - just as she had felt guilty about not speaking to her mother yet. Mikhalis wanted to tell her that none of that mattered to him. After all, she and Leo had only known each other less than a couple of weeks. Who was he to expect her to report everything to him, when he himself understood that in the sweetness of a new romance, noone would want to include other people at all.

Whatever it was that was on her mind, he hated it, hated that it was obliging her to come to him like this. He wanted very much to alleviate that burden, at the very least to let her know that he wasn't going to judge her, and that his love for her remained no matter what. He knew one of the easiest ways to communicate to Siana was through humour, even in the direst of situations. If it triggered tears, he would do it still, because at least then she could sob it out through her laughter, or curse him, or relax or whatever happened to get those burdensome feelings out.

She sat up, leaning forward onto the table.

"I don't know how to start-"

"Is it a boy thing? Do you need sex advice?" Mikhalis was joking, but in all seriousness he wanted Siana to feel that whatever was going on, he was least concerned about her feminine virtues - she had more worth to him than the status of her personal, intimate activities.

She collapsed into laughter, burying her face in her folded arms on the table.

"Because that would be uncomfortable for me, darling. I can ask Kyria Despina to speak to you, or maybe the village priest?" he kept on chatting amicably to her as she shook with laughter.

"Stop!"

"Don't be embarrassed, we have all been there. Should I speak to Leo instead? You are obviously incapacitated at the moment. Maybe a housemeeting would be appropriate."

Siana held up a hand weak at the wrist, trying to get him to stop. Mikhalis took it, holding it as if she was looking for a saving hand.

"Oh, my dear girl, you are losing control of yourself. You're so weak, there's no strength in your hand! Maybe we should call a town meeting? Call everyone together with the church bells."

Finally, he started laughing along with her, and felt better that she was relaxing a little. He let go of her hand, and she sat up, still chuckling as she unzipped her jacket, warm from the laughter.

"Oh god, Kyria Despina already made her moves on the boys," she said, "When I took them to her shop."

Mikhalis laughed, still waiting for Siana to finally say what she had come to say.

"If Kyria Despina liked Leo, then he's okay with me," he smiled. "You already know that anyway, don't you, my love?"

Siana nodded.

"Thank you, Dad," she said, her eyes tearing again. She sniffed, sitting up and taking a sudden deep breath.

"I'm sorry to have worried you. I feel that something I had in my hands is being taken away from me, but... nothing's actually happened yet."

"Can you tell me?"

Siana sighed, then covered her face with her hands.

She had to tell her dad that there were pictures of her snogging Leo from Vixx out there. She couldn't help but feel mortified, not so much that they were out there, not even that they had been taken without her knowledge - but because her parents might see them. She couldn't bring herself to say it, and felt herself burning up with embarrassment.

"Are you pregnant?"

"NO! Daaaad!" Siana snatched her hands away from her face and looked up at the balcony above, obviously worried that he might have been overheard by someone, anyone.

"Then what? Is he married or something?"

"No!"

"Is he secretly gay and wants you to pretend to be his girlfriend?" Mikhalis was trying so hard to come up with joke scenarios to show her there were many, many dire situations that he had already thought of - and that what she had to say was not going to upset him as badly as she seemed to believe.

Siana laughed bitterly. "That would be preferable to what is happening right now."

Mikhalis laughed. "Really? Come on, sweetie, it can't be so bad!"

"There are pictures," she blurted out, cringing.

MIkhalis was quiet for a moment. He reached over and pulled her hand into his grasp, looking at her worriedly.

"You've exchanged nudes already? Isn't that too soon?" His face was the picture of concern.

Siana laughed, so hard. Oh, how she loved her dad. He had somehow figured out that the way to get her over her own mortification was to mortify her even more with his own lurid thoughts.

They heard the kettle whistling.

Mikhalis patted her hand and stood up, mumbling casually over his shoulder as he turned towards the kitchen, "You're a human being with normal feelings. If it isn't murder or cruelty, there is nothing that you can do that would upset me, my darling."

As he walked up the stairs, Siana felt hot burning tears streak down her cheeks.

In the strangest, most despairing moments of her life, she felt surrounded by love.

 

**

 

Leo reached the landing outside the penthouse and sighed. He felt defeated, as if he had been winded before he could put his hands up to fight. He was about to ring the doorbell when he pulled back his hand and waited.

He knew it would be warm inside and that his brothers were all waiting to be there for him.

He just couldn't bear to see them right now. When he finally spoke to N on the phone, he found out that they had been taped, as he had feared, but that was not all. There was footage from this afternoon when they were by the sea. And footage from the night they first kissed.

He didn't ask how much N had seen, or if everyone had seen it all. It was already bad enough that they knew what the clips were of.

His own deep-seated desire to control the pace of their exposure had been wrested from him, and he felt deeply violated by the act.

Although, he felt more disappointed than angry. He could see why the man recorded them, after all, he knew that as long as anyone knew who he was, he could expect that a camera would be recording him.

He just didn't expect that here, he had even been recognised.

He wondered if that bartender had spiteful intentions, because he felt he had been rejected. He wondered if perhaps he should have acknowledged the man that night.

Leo sighed again, turning towards the staircase and sitting down a few steps above the landing. The air was chilly, and he looked up to let the chill sweep over his warm face. He leaned back, resting his elbows on a higher step.

From experience, he knew that acknowledging a fan's overzealous attentions could either have calming effects on them, or could heighten their zeal. Ignoring that sort of behaviour, like screaming, or reaching or touching, had always been his best policy, and it also fit his sometimes cold demeanour.

He was at the point where he was comfortable chatting idly to the more reasonable fans, whose sense of humour often set the tone for him, and helped him respond with his usual dry comments.

He shook his head. He believed he acted as any person would have when receiving unsolicited attentions, celebrity or not.

His hunch was that the man had taken the footage for his own personal satisfaction of having caught such a private moment. Unfortunately, the urge to share and be the one with such a scoop of a recording, could overcome even the best of fans.

He knew that by now, the machinery that was their company support team would have been set into action. Back home, a tiny team of staff would already be scouring the net for any of that footage, ready to pounce on the publishers or sharers. If it was bigger than they could handle, the job would be outsourced to a professional service. He frowned. More and more people would become privy to this, even if the clips never really saw the light of day.

He took a deep breath. There was no shame in what they were doing, in his mind.

But they could become fodder for shamers. And Siana would bear the brunt of it.

It wouldn't be like they had broken any laws, but that would make it all the more reasonable to haters to take on the role of punishers and judges themselves.

He sat back up, groaning. He couldn't help but wonder if the clip of him and Siana on the night at the club was clear. Whether it captured their faces, or just their forms. Whether anyone could see him looking at her with desire just before he kissed her for the very first time. Or if it caught her expression when he pulled away. He squeezed his eyes shut, hanging his head.

The look he had given her as he wiped his mouth and said, "What am I doing?"

He felt so ashamed of that moment, and it had taken him so long to square it with her, to get her to trust him again. And now, barely a day or two after their stalled romance had turned into something so sweet and hot, this.

He ran his hands through his hair in agitation, tears forming in his eyes. He felt frustrated, and totally at a loss.

Although he and Siana had been able to talk during their walk along the beach, once they each got their calls, they found they were silent as they walked back to their building. He had been engrossed with the thoughts of what would be going on back home, and what this could mean for her. She... he wasn't sure how close she was to going back to "let's just see what happens". Or to saying, enough.

He realised that him insisting on their relationship being more than a holiday romance, was putting pressure on her. He had managed to get her to meet him halfway, to consider thinking of their time in Greece as a precursor to something more once they both got back home. But now, he couldn't help replaying her teary question to him on the beach.

"...if it hurts me, then why do you want to be with me?"

The question had stung him. His initial perception was that she was being accusatory, but he knew better. He could see she had not faltered from her commitment to him. She was thinking of them both. He was gladdened to realise she was thinking of him.

He wondered if he could be with her just for another couple of weeks, then casually say goodbye forever. Originally, what did that mean for her? Was she really up for something so casual? He could see she was free of traditional beliefs about commitment. He felt that he was too. He didn't believe that he necessarily had to have such commitment to someone just because he was attracted to them, or wanted to indulge in a physical relationhsip.

Except when it came to her.

No, he realised what his instincts had already told him. Siana was someone special, and he did not think he could explain to anyone why. She just was. Perhaps it was because she seemed to see him for what he was, and didn't push for anything more than what he was ready to give.

In fact, it was he doing more of the pushing than she was. She seemed to be drawing him out of himself, elliciting words and actions he hadn't thought he wanted to say or do - until they came into each others' lives.

He remembered the immediate possessive feeling he had had over her, before they had even had their first conversation.

Was it only because he had secretly watched her dancing alone? He thought not. After all, even though her moves had been salacious, none of them were new to him, he had seen it over the years and even danced his own versions with other women who made their living the same way he did.

Perhaps it was the way she had first looked at him when he slouched into the studio like the guilty sap that he was, pretending to be aloof when he was actually still reeling from almost being found out. It was a look that was full of expectation, seeking, but restrained.

Perhaps it was her self-assurance in the face of their sudden appearance. In the face of N's smirking attentions. Of Ken's heated approach.

He thought of their afternoon of basketball, after she had fallen bodily against him on the ground, when she had pulled her hand away from his chest after inadvertently touching him to see if he was okay.

She knew her place, and never overstepped her professional bounds. She reigned in her temper but wasn't afraid to show her indignance, either. He recalled the moment she thought N had implied she needed reminding to keep their presence in Itea a secret during that walk to Miami for breakfast.

Leo looked up in sudden realisation.

She didn't need anything from him. He had nothing that he could give her - because all the things he could give her, she didn't want or need.

In fact, he seemed to come with a whole lot of unnecessary baggage for her.

Yet, she still wanted him.

Leo felt his sunken feelings lift suddenly. In the face of the whole sordid affair, he felt lightened, alive. Siana still wants to be with me, he thought, even though she was trying to give me, us, an out. He felt a warmth suffuse him, spreading from deep within his chest and rising up into his cheeks.

The door opened suddenly, and he looked up to see N poke his head out the door, then yelp in fright to find him sitting there.

"Why are you sitting there all cold and lonely when we are in here worrying about you, you..." N stopped when he saw Leo's calm, almost contented face.

"What?" N looked behind him, then stepped out of the house, pulling the door almost closed.

He came forward and looked down at Leo, his arms crossed to keep himself warm.

"You okay?"

Leo sighed, shrugging. He looked up at N, a small, sad smile on his lips. This was his friend, someone whom he could lean on, but who couldn't help him. He reached up, and N unfolded his arms to take his outstretched hand. They stood there like a tired old couple, used to feelings of weariness.

"You said everyone wanted this for me. Do you still feel the same?" he asked quietly, looking up into N's concerned eyes. N rolled them and let go of his hand.

"I said we all were happy to see you happy. None of us want what is happening now to burden you," he said, sitting down next to him and hugging him around the shoulders. Leo smiled, his eyes on the door.

He leaned over to N and whispered, "Is that Ken or Hyukkie?"

N sighed, "I thought they were too scared to see your angry face."

Ken peeked his head around the door, his normally smiling eyes large and concerned.

"Ken here," he said, unnecessarily.

He opened the door wider and leaned against its edge. Hyuk came around from behind him, to lean against the door jamb.

"Hyung. You look... calm," Hyuk said.

Leo looked from one to the other.

"How much did you see?" Leo asked.

"We only watched the one from today," N said. "The one in the park."

Leo nodded. He knew they had not watched the rest for his sake. But he would have to watch the other clips himself to see what was on them, and he knew, so would Kkomae who had to speak to the higher ups about it. Eventually the boys would find out what was on it.

But what would that matter if the whole world had access to it? Leo knew he had to move on from that regret, there was nothing he could do about it now.

Hyuk gently asked, "Hyung, are you mad we watched it?"

Leo heard a gentleness in his voice that he rarely did. He looked at Hyukkie's purposely blank expression, knowing he couldn't be mad at any of them, didn't want to be.

"I'm mad, but not at you. I just wanted a bit more time. Do you know what I mean?" Hyuk nodded.

"Why are you so calm?" Ken's suddenly loud voice echoed through the stairwell. Leo looked up at him, seeing that he was agitated. Ravi appeared at his side, putting a hand on his shoulder.

"It's okay," he murmured, looking over at Leo.

"I want to kick that guy. Deflate his tires. Spit in his water," Ken said, angrily, cutely.

"Alright, don't hurt yourself, tough guy," Ravi nodded with a tiny smirk on his face. He gently steered Ken back inside. Leo could hear his low mumblings as he tried to placate Ken.

Hyuk smiled as Hongbin sidled up to the doorway and looked around curiously.

"Why is this meeting being held here and not inside where it's warm and soft?" he asked drily, looking at Leo as he asked.

N leaned against Leo and practically purred.

"Because Taekwoon wanted to stay out here and I can be-" Leo stood then, laughing and pulling N up as well. Hongbin stepped aside as they went in with Hyuk.

He noticed Leo had left his phone on the stairs, so he went to pick it up before going in. As he turned, he heard the creak of a metal hinge above him. He looked up to see that there was a metal door at the top of the semicircular stairs, right above where they had been sitting. It was closed, so he put it down to normal house creaks and noises. He presumed it was the door to the roof where wind and sun would affect its state throughout the day.

He followed them all inside to find Leo seated by the fireplace on one of the sofas, with N next to him and Hyuk perched on one of the arms. Opposite, Kkomae sat alone. Hongbin sat down with him. Ravi seemed to be consoling a morose Ken on the carpet by the balcony doors.

"Good news," Kkomae started, peering at his handphone and scrolling down through his email. "Nothing has come up in any of the searches so as far as the company is concerned, there is no immediate danger of exposure. Since Mr Panos deleted the original clips, we will assume that none have been posted to the net. However there may be other copies if the clips have been shared, or they may be stored on a harddrive... we don't know."

Kkomae shifted, glancing up from his phone finally to look at Leo. Leo's face was a mask, and he stared dead eyed at the table between them. He couldn't help but feel that he should have been more careful, given out more warnings to all the boys. He had seen the attraction between Siana and Leo, and had been happy for it. Perhaps he should have taken a more professional stance.

Kkomae didn't like the idea. Even with this all hanging over Leo, over them all, he was glad that he had had even a few moments of fun, let alone happiness.

However he felt, he was now carrying out corporate duties, and he turned his attention back to his phone.

"Perhaps our error was in trying to maintain secrecy. The company would like you all to begin posting a few pictures of tourist destinations here, to reveal being on an official company holiday. Post pictures of the people we have met if they allow it, but do not reveal the nature of your relationship. For example, Mr Mikhalis is not our landlord, but a musical collaborator. Miss Siana is not the daughter of our landlord, but a local stand-in for N-ssi's preparation for the new stage. Show footage. You can even reveal that we have been here for almost two weeks. Do not reveal the address, do not reveal that we are staying here, even if you post pictures of Itea. No location IDs, only pretty pictures, selcas and work pictures. Is it clear?"

Everyone nodded except Leo, who bowed his head.

"It is fortunate we have a trip planned for Athens. I will be arranging an official meeting and tour with the embassy and we will be guests at an event."

Kkomae paused as a few of the boys started murmuring.

"We are preparing for any eventuality, and having a public profile of our presence here will soften any possible eventualities. At the very least we will not look like we have been hiding away here in secret."

N nodded. Slowly, the others chimed in with their acquiescence, most of them thinking of Leo. With this public scrutiny, his chances of a romance blooming naturally were severely curtailed. If ever he was seen in public with Siana, he would have to pretend they were nothing more than acquaintances or professional colleagues.

Suddenly they heard Leo speak.

"Guys. I am so sorry," he sniffed.

N and Hongbin looked at each other in shock. Hyuk glanced at Ravi and Ken.

"I brought this all on you. We might as well be home, working," he looked up, his eyes red.

N curled his lip in disgust, his own tears threatening to spill.

"For god's sake, WHAT ISWRONG WITH YOU?" he yelled.

 

 

**

 

Siana took the lift up to her apartment and let herself in, exhausted. She stripped her outer clothes off and got into the shower, shivering with the unheated water, but feeling like she needed it badly. She roughly shampooed her hair and rinsed it, running conditioner through it before soaping up her body. The cold water made it harder for the conditioner to rinse out, so she simply let the water rain down on her head as she cleaned herself.

She had come to a very simple conclusion after her conversation with her father: if he was okay, she was okay.

She knew the same would go for her mother. She had no other people in her life that she felt she owed any explanations to, and only wanted to see Leo soon, as they had not finished their conversation. There were still things left unresolved. They had no idea what the other clips were of - although she was certain the first clip from today was of them in their passionate embrace by the sea.

She stopped, turning to face the wall and letting the cold water run down the length of her neck and back as she held her arms tightly crossed over her breasts. She gasped as the still-icy water ran in unrelentingly cold rivulets down her body.

She remembered gasping in almost the same way when he had suckled on her earlobe. Under the chill of the water she felt a heat blossom in her belly. It rose up into her chest and flowed down between her legs and she felt suffused with an aching desire that couldn't be dampened by the cold.

In a moment that felt like spinning madness, she wondered why he couldn't be with her now, why they shouldn't already be in each others' arms and having what the world might presume to think they have anyway. To hell with the consequences, they could be free and enjoy each other.

At least, for now.

The madness reached a crescendo before it came crashing down, to the reality of the situation. She turned off the water as she stood there breathless and hot and cold all over.

As she reached for her towel and stepped out of the shower stall, she thought to herself that the obstacle now lay in how Taekwoon looked at their relationship.

Taekwoon. She let his name repeat in her thoughts. Funny how she had never really referred to him with his real name except in fun, she was so used to his stage moniker.

Taekwoon. Serious. Stalwart. Loyal.

She could see he wanted to do right by her. She could sense his devotion to the building of their relationship - or at least his intention to do so. He seemed so earnest, so honourable. Such wonderful things which she wanted, but knew were colouring his perception of what their relationship could be.

She felt increasingly that what he wanted was to do the right thing - and it wasn't that she didn't want that either. It was just that she wanted other things more, or at least, that he just had to BE with her.

Just be.

She dressed, finally feeling warmed through, in her sleeping clothes of fresh clean jogger pants and hoodie. She boiled the kettle to make tea and put on the tv to some late night variety show. As she waited by the kettle, running her fingers through her drying hair, she gazed at the gas flame.

She pondered over his predilection for restraint and caution, which only seemed to extend as far as his words. She raised an eyebrow. When it came to physical matters though, he wasn't afraid to colour outside the lines. She smiled to herself, enjoying a few flashbacks of his singular ardour. She huffed, shaking her head. Even with his minimal overtures, he certainly knew how to make her heart race.

Until he opened up that door to the part of his brain that liked to halt their intimate proceedings with concerns, anxieties and preemptive hogwash.

She stopped, resting her hands on the counter and feeling indignant.

The man was a tease.

She thought for a moment. Well, maybe that wasn't technically true. At least, it wasn't his intention, she would give him that. But she could feel the effects of having her physical desires stoked over and over, without a chance of the embers actually lighting up in flame. At some point, something had to give.

She could feel her skin, now so sensitive after being iced by water whilst her body burned with the memory of his kisses, as if it were chafing under the gentle fabric of her clothes.

She saw his strong and gentle hands as they reached for her, and wanted desperately to feel the pads of his fingertips trace across her body.

The kettle seemed to climax on her behalf, reminding her that she was making tea to calm herself in anticipation of a good night's sleep. She laughed at herself. It seemed like falling in love was nothing but a series of cliches that suddenly didn't seem so silly or unreasonable anymore.

Am I falling in love? She thought she would be able to definitively answer that question once she did, but now that she was in the thick of it, she couldn't identify her feelings at all.

She felt mentally objective. But her body seemed to betray her with its animalistic, sensual responses.

She felt, she knew, that everything about this was right. But she couldn't verbally or mentally articulate it as falling in love.

She poured her cup and brought the tea to the sofa bed, turning off lights along the way.

I can't even say if it was love at first sight, unless you count falling for a digital representation of a person you have never met as a legitimate way of doing so. That would mean that when I first saw him in the studio, I was already in love if that is what you call it. She suddenly thought, maybe I shouldn't think of falling in love as something that involves knowing each other in the conventional sense.

After all, you can realise you love someone after getting to know them over time. Or you can lust after someone without even liking or loving them. So falling in love isn't necessarily about knowing the other person's character or heart or mind... but just about knowing.

About it being right.

And for Siana, this felt so right.

She just wished she could somehow convey to him that understanding, so that he might just keep that door in his mind shut, or forgotten, and just let himself fall into love as freely as she wanted to do.

Siana, Siana, Siana. She shook her head as she brought the tea up to her lips and blew on its surface.

You're just spinning some shit to make your raging hormonal urges seem more wholesome.

She smiled and sipped her tea, feeling that lovely warmth slide down her throat and bring a soft heat to her throat.

She realised that, somehow, they had each gone home to their family for solace.

She hoped that he, like she, had found some touchstone that helped disperse the anxiety within, through contact with his brothers. She supposed that as long as he let them, at least N or Hongbin would somehow find a way to assure him they were there for him.

She watched the tv unblinkingly, not really hearing or seeing anything, wondering what news would have come from home for him.

Her body was so tired she felt exhausted holding herself upright, so she leaned back and to the side, putting her tea safely on the small side table next to the sofa. She leaned her head into her folded arms and watched the tv from a sideway position, dozing off gently.

She heard a knock on her door, and opened her eyes to find that the programme had ceased and late night commercials were playing. How long had she been asleep? She sat up with a deep draw of breath, waking herself up.

It had to be past midnight. Who could be at her door? She got up, fully awake, and went quietly to the door to listen.

"Siana. Ana," she heard him say softly. She felt a moment of panic. Did he have bad news?

She unlocked the door and pulled it open, her eyes adjusting to the glare of the bright light outside.

He was leaning against the door frame, his wide shoulders hunched over with his hands in his pockets. He too had bathed and changed, and was in slouchy clothes with a long overcoat thrown on top.

His eyes were red-rimmed, tired. He had a resigned look on his face, and she could feel that the tiredness reached deep to his bones.

They stared at each other for a long moment, he looking forlorn and ragged. She dropped her eyes to his mouth, usually firm but now open, and pouty from tiredness.

She waited to see if he would say anything, but he seemed to be so lost, so unable to find the words.

She leaned on the door frame on her side of the doorway, coming in close so that she had to look up into his solemn eyes. As she did, she reached her hand up and placed it on his heart.

She felt him take a shaky breath, his head dropping forward towards her. She put gentle pressure on him there, rubbing his chest slowly, calmingly. His eyes drooped closed for a moment as a frown knitted his brows together. She could see his breath was uneven, but couldn't tell what emotion was running through him.

Was he in despair? Or just responding physically to her touch? Did he really have bad news and couldn't tell her?

She didn't care about any news he might have. Right now, she had him in front of her, and she wanted to assuage whatever fear or anxiety he seemed to have. She stepped closer, putting her hands around his waist and hugging him. She let her head rest against the very spot she had touched, and listened for his heartbeat. She inhaled slowly, deeply, smelling laundry detergent heated by the warmth of his body.

It was sexy, masculine. Comforting. She inhaled again, then realised he was not hugging her back, his hands still in his pockets.

She sighed, thinking that he was holding back again, and leaned back a little to look up at him, only to find that he was watching her with a sort of sleepy tenderness that she found surprising.

"Are you here to say goodnight?" she asked him, a little amusedly.

Unamusedly, he shook his head. She saw his chin jut a little, as if he were a sullen child. She suddenly felt that he was sulking, or looking for solace.

"Is there something you want to talk about?" he nodded, then shook his head, making her smile. Two truths. She felt herself softening, realising that under that sombre, sulky exterior, he was also playing.

"Is Taekwoon sad?" she saw him respond to her using his name, then he nodded, forlornly, his eyes now deep with something like sadness.

Longing.

"Does Taekwoon need another hug?" she whispered, smiling up at him. He smiled a little then.

He nodded, then paused, the smile slowly disappearing. Looking searchingly into her eyes, he then shook his head.

Siana felt her heartbeat surge. He looked staggeringly, desperately handsome as he watched her own smile fade away. Her hands dropped away from him.

He watched her, calmly, unwaveringly, as she reached for his hand.

Then she took a step back, and pulled him into her home.


End file.
